Three Heads Are Better Than None

Written by: Jimmy Anderson

A two headed dragon one day.
Came to Scotland a person to slay.
   A guy in a kilt.
   You could tell didn't wilt
Was so frisky and wanted to play.

The dragon took one look at him.
But the guy in the kilt was so slim.
   The wind blew a gust.
   His kilt did adjust.
Could see all, if your eyes were not dim!

The wind blew him this way and that.
The dragon got hold of his hat.
   "I'll make you my meal
    If you'll just be still."
"Oh no you won't I'm far too fat!"

Laughing with glee in his eye.
His privates the dragon did spy.
   "Pull down your kilt
   Your flower will wilt.
For I think you'll make a good pie!"

The man in the kilt laughed with glee.
"You'll not eat me and I will go free.
   For I have this hose
   which now has arose,
and will kill you, there's no need to plea!"

The hose that arose now was froze.
And he used it to beat his oppose.
   The dragon now dead
   was beat with a head.
His kilt was in place I suppose.

The moral of this Scotish hymn.
Take pictures and keep them on film.
   For proof of your story
   no dragons get glory.
A sacrifice yes, not a whim!


*For "Indulge Me Scotish Style" contest