Bah, Humbug

Written by: John Heck

Ah, the glorious damned winter
and the inviting  
gray chill in the air.
I meander 
ever 
so
slowly 
past lawns
strewn 
with a cluttered array
of pagan snow zombies -
staring blankly,
as I obliterate pint-sized
snow angels 
failing to don halos
that could have easily been
brush stroked with 
da Vinci's golden teardrops.

(Impoverished attention-getters)

"I suggest you peruse Alighieri’s 'Inferno' –
it may, at least, promote heat - if not hope!"

(Simpletons)

Frost continues to cloud my spectacles -
thick and relentless
eagerly permeating the glass -
endeavoring to dance
a feverish Fantasia foxtrot
upon the skins of my pupils.

My heavy feet scuffle
past these endearing peasants.
Bleak…frozen…
forgotten Mt. Everest tombstones.
Disgraced outcasts of embarrassment -
smashed against a stark white canvas
hands cut off –

sticking out their parched tongues
begging for alms.
Click and count.

Their fragile bodies so much alive
their dark, hallowed eyes 
so 
much 
dead.

(So be it)

They stealthily huddle alone -
(Hah! I’ve created my own personal oxymoron!)

These gruesome street urchin waifs -
Dumber than a sackful of hammers and
frostier than a Maine Christmas morn,
convulsing and shivering ‘neath lampposts
without snow shoes or socks,

bawling and boo-hooing...
“Clutching weather-worn copies
of James Hilton’s 'Lost Horizon'
and littering the virgin snow
with salty saline discharge –
igniting street corner bonfires
without the faintest hint of smoke."

(Wasteful)

Ah, the glorious damned winter
and that magnificent gray chill in the air.
My arctic thighs carry me home now
where I am safe.
Where I can slam my door
and shut my eyes.

My cavernous domicile
whereas I can privately converse
with Mr. Dickens and Mr. O’Neill
and read “A Christmas Carol”
or “The Iceman Cometh” -
without a snaggle-toothed interruption...
Listen to the haunting strains of L’Inverno
from Vivaldi’s “Le Quattro Staggioni”
and cackle wildly as I burn first editions
of Clement Clark Moore’s
most infamous penning -

pour myself a 
tall glass of ice cubes -
devour a heaping bowl
of vichyssoise -

scarf down a fudgcicle
and just...

turn the air conditioner

ON.