I Am

Written by: Autumn Page

I am tired of asking myself if you're ever going to make your way back. 
I am tired of using other people as distractions to keep my mind off of you. 
I am tired of catching myself when I'm at the bottom. 
I am tired of writing the same letter, but never sending it. 
I am tired of obsessively checking phone, expecting a missed call from you. 
I am tired of pretending to be okay. 
I am tired of feeling and appearing so pathetic. 
And I am tired of the way I act when you're not around. 
As if I am someone to be around. 
I am tired of the way the sky looks when you're not here. 
I am tired of the way I want him, because you're not here.
I am tired of letting myself go to depressing songs. 
I am tired of not being able to focus on my actual life. 
I am tired of looking at pictures from a while back and saying to myself, "when things
were good." 
I am tired of going back. 
I am tired of remembering . 
I am tired of wanting something I know I'll never have. 
I am tired of coming up with excuses. 
And other than that, I am tired of writing this letter to you. 
So take this, and run with it. 
Because that is what you always do.