Undefined

Written by: Nesma Alnsour

My pen I will confess,
For you will hear my every thought
Without condemn

When I’m alone, my head
Is abundant with loud questions
Of where I belong
I sometimes find myself gazing
Through nothingness without an end
I find myself drifting
Through this life without effect
I wonder
If I deserve this gift I’ve been given
From a god I have forgotten
I wonder
If I’m worth what I’ve been blessed

Eyes to see
Ears to listen 
Hands to touch
Mind to think
Heart to love
Life to live

I swirl through days and night
Searching for a definition
For this life I’m living

I often try hard,
To analyze and guess,
To investigate and ponder
For things I don’t understand

Somewhere deeper, there must be
Some meaning to this life,
Some way to make a difference,
An ending for the puzzle of the mind

...It's undefined

Is there some hidden meaning?
Maybe in a dictionary I haven’t found
A greater purpose awaits 
For care and desire

It bothers and hurt me, to be always slightly out of sight;
A vivid vision out of reach,
Where darkness sheds the light

I struggle to bring clarity
For a vision that might give me an answer
Yet, this perfect illusion
Always fades before my glare.

Just adds more questions,
To my tired endless gaze

Perhaps I'm trying too hard,
To understand it all,
For can we ever truly know
Just what we have in this haunted soul?
But will my searching bring to me
The answers i cant define

Or will it leave me shattered,
And confused as I always am,
While questions bring no relief 
To my wrinkled eyes

still...
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