Written by: Louise Picek

My old self whispers to me,
taunts me,
tells me they are what I want.
In my darkest of moments they are there for me,
reminding me of how free I can feel.
Deep down they tear out my soul,
they never seem to let go.
I count the years,
the months,
the days,
that I've claimed to be free from their grasp,
but daily they are haunting me.

At moments I relish in the thoughts,
dream of their relief,
find my self reaching for their devilish devices.
Tears start to overtake me,
so much strength it takes,
how I want to give in to my vices,
let them cut me deep within,
but I somehow fight their enticements,
keep clawing at the chains that they throw on me.
Daily these battles are churning,
vices so cunningly sweet,
leaving me at the brink of insanity.