Could You Hear Me?

Written by: Tyesha Ehigiator

Ignorant questions you asked
While requesting in return intelligent answers

A pillow of tears I cried 
But only for awhile

Yet instead my heart was beating like a hammer beats a nail
And I was slowly decreasing like a paper being filed

Into shelter I would hide
Behind doors I cried
Over the  phone I denied
And  inside I died

As if hanging up in my face weren't enough
You left me no choice, but to fall asleep with your 
Thoughtless and careless words

The constant need to be in control of everything and everyone 
I closed my eyes to hold back those tears
Those tears that were trying so desperately to break through

But steadily they came running down my face
Like I was pouring water down a drain

But did you hear me
That language that I spoke

I was talking out loud to all the distant ears
I begged you to lower your voice
But you were to busy screaming at me to hear

You see I constantly found myself apologizing to you
Not believing that I had a right to my own opinion
And that I had a right to be loved and respected

I cursed at times, You kept me mad
And then most days you left me sad
But could you hear me
Could you take my point of view for once
After all that was said and done

My heart was aching and my soul was breaking
A little attention, Like a baby crying out for its mother
Is all I asked of you

Only to hear you speak your truth of belief
And then hang up in my face with a gasp of relief
As if my voice was killing you

When I defended myself , I never knew what I would face
Never knew how you'd react, But I was acting on faith
So I took that leap of faith, I didn't know what else to do
But thank God I found the courage to stand up to you

You made it seem like we were in some game
And half time conversations is all you could spare

Yet like a mother in the midst of labor
I bared all the pain, You couldn't bare

But I had to speak out 
My silence had to be broken

Words shattered at that moment
Shock encountered ones face
Something that never happened before

I would not pretend, That all was well
But you weren't listening to me, I was talking to myself

When I poured out my heart to you sincerely
You belittled me, cursed me, degraded and ignored me
Picked and devoured me like I was poultry

You took me through so much misery
You see this lonely faucet, Only runs so deep
But I found the strength to break free, finally

I wanted to be friends but I remember too clearly 
Just how it was in the past, When you couldn't hear me