happy fathers day big fat dad

Written by: Steve Humphries Artist

Happy Fathers Day Big Fat Father!

Happy fathers day big fat Dad
I forgot to get you a card but don’t be sad
Its not that I forgot, more that I got distracted
You know what it’s like when you’re mean and tight-fisted

I said to myself as I left the house,
I’ll get him a card but I will use my nouse,
What would dad do, let me see
I know, he’d try and get a card for 20p

But when I got to the blasted shop,
Wide eyed and in amazement I had to stop,
For you see the cards were very expensive
Something I knew you would find offensive,

So after spending my money on myself,
I decided to give you something of far greater wealth,
I know, I thought, I will make him a card,
All sentimental a real colourful work of art!

But then it occurred to me while I was trying to be kind,
You wouldn’t appreciate it because your colour blind,
Not only that (and this broke my heart),
You wouldn’t understand it, being a silly old fart.

So after thinking and pondering all of the night
I didn’t know what to do, try as I might,
I was starting to worry and with seconds to spare
I wrote you this crap poem and I don’t even care!