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Written by: Tony Kirk  Send Soup Mail    
Read Poems by Tony Kirk

Lieutenant Uhura

I met up with Lieutenant Uhura
in a small cake shop in Truro. 
She was the Starship’s communications officer
and she played havoc with my blood pressure.

We ordered some cake and some clotted cream
Drank Romulan scrumpy and methylene
“Kirk to Uhura!” I heard the captain say
“Report to the bridge right away.”

“The reception desk is empty the temp has gone away”
“There’s no one on the Enterprise answer the phone today.”
Then she looked deep into my dark blue eyes and said

“I take one bloody day’s holiday and look what happens”

Soon she was back on board with her crew
"Good morning, Starship enterprise, how can I help you”


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  1. Date: 4/16/2014 12:57:00 AM

    Oh fab write Tony - I loved the old Star Trek with William Shatner etc, but but we are currently watching old episodes of Next Generation - could listen to Patrick Stewart's voice all day lol Hugs Jan x
  1. Date: 4/12/2014 8:25:00 PM

    Love Star Trek, great write!
  1. Date: 4/11/2014 8:13:00 AM

    HA! Very funny, Tony! Enjoyed. love and hugs, catie :)

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