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ONWARD CHRISTIAN POETS

ONWARD CHRISTIAN POETS


(To the tune of Onward Christian
Soldiers)


(Please try to sing along)


Onward then ye poets, we
all want some more,
All that writing poems - we
all do adore,
Now my ink is dry, as I start
to cry,
No one writes good poems
now, this I can't deny.

(Chorus)
Onward Christian Poets,
writing as they do,
I have writers cramp now,
and I need the loo.

Onward to the library, as
it's quiet like home,
But why are so many 
yapping on their mobile
phone?
This I will not tolerate, 
and they have to go,
All I want is peace and 
quiet - that they'll all soon
know!

(Chorus)
Onward Christian poets,
having a crafty smoke,
Will they continue writing - 
oh yes, but where's our 
coke?

Onward to the council,
we want a tax-free grant,
All that red tape, now, it
really makes me rant!
Jobsworths in their offices,
looking all elite,
Grinning like a Cheshire 
cat - their pockets they do
treat!

(Chorus)
Onward Christian poets,
feeling very down,
When they're free from
writing - they all hit the
town!

Come now turn those phones
off - I can't concentrate,
All that clicking and yapping - 
all this I really hate!
Turn the darn things off, I
say - as I lose my cool,
Now I'm Victor Meldrew - 
I don't believe it, fool! 

(Chorus)
Onward Christian poets,
sitting down for tea,
Hello to that nice lady - 
sitting on my knee!

Onward Christian poets
march to London Town,
They are to campaign, 
and to see the crown.
Onward to the palace, 
and to see the Queen - 
Can she save the poets
verse, and tell them
they're supreme!

(Chorus)
Onward Christian poets,
all do want some sun,
Facing boring Nick Clegg - 
and David Cameron!

Onward then to Parliament,
were the corrupt do plot,
Guy Fawkes at the ready - 
writing his verse in soot.
Will we write the poems of
what happened here,
Poets at the ready now - 
we've nothing left to fear!

(Chorus)
Onward Christian poets,
you are now the best.
For you have all made
history - by writing in
mode text!


THE END

BY
DARRYL ASHTON  

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