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From anxiety to Joy

Peter Duggan Avatar Peter Duggan - LIFETIME Premium Member Peter Duggan - Premium MemberPremium Member Send Soup Mail Go to Poets Blog Block poet from commenting on your poetry

Below is the poem entitled From anxiety to Joy which was written by poet Peter Duggan. Please feel free to comment on this poem. However, please remember, PoetrySoup is a place of encouragement and growth.

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From anxiety to Joy

From anxiety to joy

Hi to all my friends
   I decided to write this story of me down, because I see so many unhappy people on this site. They make this very clear to me when I read some of their beautiful poems. I have tried telling it in verse, but now I feel it is time to write it down in prose

    When I was a child I was not happy because I had very strict parents who robbed me of all my freedom. I was a very freedom loving boy and I felt so totally restricted in a family that never could and never would understand me. There was a lot of psychological cruelty handed out to me by my Father and a hell of lot of bullying, I was subjected to by the other kids, I came from a very rough part of London called Peckham, and I was an extremely sensitive young lad.

    When I grew up I married a beautiful Australian girl named Vera who is still my beloved wife after fifty years. We immigrated to Australia, and after about three months, I decided to join the army, and I volunteered to go to Vietnam, so I could pay back the kindness that the Australians had Showed me by receiving me to their beautiful country.

     I served in Vietnam for about nine and a half months, then they decided to ship me back to Australia because of injuries and illness. when I came back my troubles all started and I developed PTSD, even though I had not really been in much danger during my days of war. I was filled with a terrible anxiety, and  was absolutely terrified of both life and death. I had these periods of deep, deep dread that completely ruled my life. I was angry most of the time, and I detested everybody I ever met with a vengeance so hard to understand

     This got worse and worse as the year proceeded, and I tried everything to control it, from counselling to reading every kind of self help books, and I read every religion, and all the stuff by so many different Spiritual teachers until I had a bookcase brim filled with all the books I had read. I tried every kind of meditation, plus yoga, Tai chi, and many other things. However, nothing worked. They helped a bit but not enough to stop the ugly terror I felt.

    Then one day I came across a man named John Sherman on the net, who has helped so many people, and thousands of people now practice what he advocates with much success.

     John told me that all I had to do was close my eyes and look at the me ness of me, it was as simple as that. At first I laughed at him with this simplistic approach to gaining back ones sanity. But I was desperate; I had walked out on my wife for a year and given everything I had away. My anger was getting worse and worse, and when I finally came back to my family, I really wasn’t worth being with. My wife tolerated me because she loved me so totally, but I could tell that I was leading her into Pyschological, of physical illness.

    So I gave John’s method a try, I meditated every day using my me ness as a meditation point. I don’t mean my thoughts or sensations, emotions or such. I mean the ‘me’ the part of me that actually runs the show. The ‘me’ that always seems hidden but is always there in the background. I noticed some changes in me very quickly, but then the progress came slower, but very steady.  Now I have been doing this for nearly five years and the difference in me is phenomenal. I am so happy now, that I could almost scream with joy. I have no more anxiety any more, and the dread that once debilitated is totally gone.

     My neurotic fear of death has faded, and although I don’t want to die, when it comes I will be totally ready for it. My life is so beautiful these days and everything seems so beautiful, and crystal clear. These days I walk on feather feet, and I am so grateful to John and his wife Carla for what they gave to me. I really want to share this with anyone who cares to listen. You would not believe how beautiful my life is these days.  Thank you for reading, all you who reached the end of this story. I hope it helps you as it most certainly helped me….Peter.

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  1. Date: 12/27/2013 10:32:00 AM
    Peter, this story really touches me. It's almost as if you are describing my husband in yourself, and me in your wife. Joe never went to any war, but his life has been full of problems . well, I should continue this in soupmail. I will have to remember this John sherman's name.

    Duggan Avatar Peter Duggan
    Date: 12/27/2013 4:02:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry


    Yes you are right Andrea he is a Rottweiler. He was given to me when he was nine months old cause he could not be controlled, but he is quite obedient these days. he was hard work to train though lol. I reckon that you were right, it was you ollyver coming back to say goodbye...peter
    Duggan Avatar Peter Duggan
    Date: 12/27/2013 3:58:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry


    Thank you Andrea, John Sherman is a man who takes no money for all the work he puts out, and he helps many lost people to find themselves with his simple action, He is not religious or spiritual, just simple and down to earth You can find him on 'justonelook.org' I am sure he will inspire you as he did me. I owe him much....peter
  1. Date: 12/27/2013 10:27:00 AM
    Before I read this one, I wanted to know what kind of dog was rotty bear? sounds like a rottweiler!! I got my dog when his habits were deeply instilled in him and I just could never train him. But I suppose if I were rich and could have hired a better trainer to help me, he could have been trained. I wrote an earlier poem about my supernatural visit from Ollyver. I like to believe my dream was him actually coming back to say goodbye to me on his way to the next life!!

  1. Date: 12/23/2013 7:29:00 PM
    Peter is my cousin and I know about his life story, I would also like to add that he has helped me with my own fears and anxieties , the only member of my entire family who was there for me, I will always love and respect this man for his kindness, generosity, compassion and most of all for just being him, I only wish you had been part of my life years ago. Loves ya Alf xxx

    Duggan Avatar Peter Duggan
    Date: 12/23/2013 10:00:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry


    Thank you so much my favourite cousin, you are too kind to me, but keep saying what you are saying it is so good for my inflated ego Lol. I really appreciate your comments Suzi.....Peterxxxxxx
  1. Date: 12/23/2013 6:35:00 PM
    If you want to be healed you will find the way and you should be very proud of yourself. Merry Christmas, Light & Love

    Duggan Avatar Peter Duggan
    Date: 12/23/2013 10:02:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry


    Thank you Debbie .Many poor vets suffered so much that they will never get over it I am afraid. I had to change or lose everything that I held dear. Many thanks for your kindness, my friend....peter
  1. Date: 12/23/2013 6:21:00 PM
    Great story my dear, not only do you have to thank John Sherman but I also have to thank him for giving my husband back to me. Luv. Ve x

    Duggan Avatar Peter Duggan
    Date: 12/23/2013 10:05:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry


    Thank you. my angel. Our marriage was treading on dangerous ground before my transformation. So I ditto that. I really appreciate the help that John gave me. I appreciate your comment very much....Peterxxxxxxxx
  1. Date: 12/23/2013 1:20:00 PM
    Great story Peter. So glad it had a happy ending. Thank you for all your good advice. Have a great Holiday and a wonderful new year!

    Duggan Avatar Peter Duggan
    Date: 12/23/2013 3:41:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry


    Thank you Vincent, after hearing some folk, I feel guilty about being so filled with joy. So I gave this story for others to see...Thanks for all your wonderful comments Vincent, and have a wonderful Christmas...peter
  1. Date: 12/23/2013 1:00:00 PM
    Peter, Thank you for visiting and also for sharing this write. I'm certain it can offer inspiration of the most needed type to many. Have a fantastic holiday season!Brad

    Duggan Avatar Peter Duggan
    Date: 12/23/2013 3:43:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry


    Thank you Bradley. it was a pleasure to read you lovely poetry. You have a wonderful holiday too...peter
  1. Date: 12/23/2013 10:33:00 AM
    Thanks for sharing your story. It's great that you found a 'cure' that works for you. I've figured out a few things over the years that work well too...and with a clear head, writing is a joy.

    Duggan Avatar Peter Duggan
    Date: 12/23/2013 3:45:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry


    Thank you David, It would be lovely if we could spread happiness to the whole wide world, but one can only try. There are a lot of unhappy people out there. You have a wonderful holiday, my friend.
  1. Date: 12/23/2013 1:04:00 AM
    How wonderful that you found your higher self. I hope your message helps others who are seeking find what they also need to find happiness. Blessings

    Duggan Avatar Peter Duggan
    Date: 12/23/2013 3:47:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry


    Thank you so much Connie, there is no need for perpetual unhappiness that see on many people's faces, so I try to spread my joy. You have a wonderful holiday period, my friend....peter