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1708: Spruce

Jake Ponce Avatar  Send Soup Mail  Block poet from commenting on your poetry

Below is the poem entitled 1708: Spruce which was written by poet Jake Ponce. Please feel free to comment on this poem. However, please remember, PoetrySoup is a place of encouragement and growth.

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1708: Spruce

Hands and wings melting The love made by a finger and a blade That feels every lash of your lips Upon every turn of the page Rolling across the frets are my phrases Dissonant chords wailing beneath the spruce Feelings strung and forgotten altogether As the music tells them their tragic tale Moons and the king behind the veils A ring touched by the blackest heart Sewn sentiments keep the city Awake with the smell of blood Breaths grew silent. I could smell barley from the parcel. Reversed for us, the cold truth Made as such so we may learn Smoke I painted facets of you on the fogged glass I remember those conversations As vomit pretending to be warm soup Hands and wings merging The love between a feather and a blade That feels the rush of your fingertips As you distastefully turn every page Details deemed unimportant remain unseen. Even if the way you see me has, our story still won't change. #1708: SPRUCE ©Jake Ponce [May 20, 2013, 12:04am] ***Rewritten October 22, 2013 for the "GROOVE IT!" contest under Rock and Roll neptunerune.tumblr.com neptunerune.deviantart.com facebook.com/neptunerune

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  1. Date: 6/12/2014 9:07:00 PM
    This is a truly fantastic write my friend!!! I find amazing meaning it's message.. Directly into my FAV it goes!!! Thanks

    Ponce Avatar Jake Ponce
    Date: 6/12/2014 10:47:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry


    Thanks, Robert!
  1. Date: 4/24/2014 3:38:00 AM
    Wow~ Amazing piece here! "As vomit pretending to be warm soup" Amazing, and disgusting line!! Loved many aspects of this poem and there are a lot of memorable metaphors. I love how you bring back the first stanza but with alteration of words. Coolbeans. : ) Always, Laura

    Ponce Avatar Jake Ponce
    Date: 6/12/2014 10:49:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry


    Hi, Laura! Glad you enjoyed this and that specific line. I actually had so many metaphors in mind while writing this and glad I picked that. LOL
  1. Date: 10/30/2013 12:24:00 PM
    Hello Jake, , enjoyed your GROOVE IT win............. ~LOVE SKAT~

    Ponce Avatar Jake Ponce
    Date: 6/12/2014 10:49:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry


    Thanks!
  1. Date: 10/29/2013 1:01:00 PM
    so proud of you, jake... the medicine man rakes in it.. congrats on your fine win in my contest; well deserved.. hope you got my soup mail!..:) encore!..:) huggs

  1. Date: 10/29/2013 10:02:00 AM
    Hi, everyone! I still can't believe that this piece made it. Thank you for always dropping by, I really appreciate your time and thoughts.

  1. Date: 10/29/2013 5:15:00 AM
    - Always enjoyable to read your poetry - Today I want to congratulate your winning poem Jake. - oxox // Anne-Lise :)

  1. Date: 10/28/2013 10:00:00 PM
    Jake. You rocked this one. Just read your poem with a guitar on my lap...feeling it, man. Grats! CTB

  1. Date: 10/28/2013 11:51:00 AM
    Jake, nicely done ... congratulations on your win...LINDA

  1. Date: 10/28/2013 7:44:00 AM
    Congrats on the win in the contest, Jack

  1. Date: 10/27/2013 9:02:00 PM
    Congrats, Jake! First place and that's briliant! You're such an awesome writer! Bless you! Love,love,love! :-) - Den

  1. Date: 10/27/2013 8:35:00 PM
    Deserving of a win, and nice job!

  1. Date: 10/27/2013 8:14:00 PM
    an amazing piece from your Jake...congrats on your first place win :)

  1. Date: 10/27/2013 4:04:00 PM
    Congrad's on your win. Light & Love

  1. Date: 10/27/2013 12:03:00 PM
    Jake---Many congrats on your 1st place win in Nette's contest....I had a feeling it would win! Julie :-)

  1. Date: 10/27/2013 11:34:00 AM
    Jake, congrats on your rocking poem and nice win. G.

  1. Date: 10/26/2013 11:51:00 AM
    Jake This is one emotional and heartfelt poem. Gives the reader goosebumps when they read the story created by you. Nice job Thanks for great comment on my Closed Minded poem.

  1. Date: 10/23/2013 11:19:00 AM
    Splendid write Jake. your poetry clutch at the heartstrings. I can feel the emotions in every line as I read it. thank you.

    Ponce Avatar Jake Ponce
    Date: 10/26/2013 9:37:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry


    Thank you!
  1. Date: 10/23/2013 9:24:00 AM
    Great job on this one, Jake...impeccable imagery! Much enjoyed, Julie :-)

    Ponce Avatar Jake Ponce
    Date: 10/26/2013 9:38:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry


    Thanks for always taking the time to read my work, Julie!
  1. Date: 10/23/2013 8:06:00 AM
    soup mail!

    Ponce Avatar Jake Ponce
    Date: 10/23/2013 11:03:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry


    Yes, ma'am~ :)
  1. Date: 10/23/2013 4:18:00 AM
    whhooo, a bombardment of edgy images and what a study- in -contrast approach, jake... you slay me to bits with this poetic sting.. hope you can include this in my ongoing contest... filipinos are good; this reminds me of nick joaquin's lamentations..:) huggs