A Redneck Visits Venice
By Elton Camp
The big-box store bought Bubba out
The price he got made him shout
“I never expected nothing’ like this!
I’m gonna make up for all I miss.”
“Italy’s the place you ought to go,”
The travel agent’s words became so
Venice was old Bubba’s first stop
When he saw it, his jaw did drop
For he saw, without any doubt,
A heavy rain had flooded it out
Bubba wrote to the folks at home
“If I kin git away I’ll go to Rome.”
“Th’ streets air flooded head deep.
Buildings air crumbling into a heap.”
“I ain’t never seen sich a place.
This disaster is a pure disgrace.”
“Hit looks like th’ Pope could pray
And make that floodin’ go away.”
Being here shore gives me chills.
I’ll be glad to git back to th’ hills.”