They may be making a memorial
For when she writes an editorial
Which happens to be way out far
Making her become a rising star.
Her writing is just like an infection
That seems to spread in every direction;
She has hired a new news reporter
Who was caught on a Star Trek transporter.
Heavens to Betsy as well as God forbid
Transporter went backwards; now she's a kid
Who later worked way up newspaper ranks;
Closest competitors were some old cranks.
Why with her pleasant, perfect personality
She is inhibited with Southern hospitality;
Wouldn't you know it between you and me
First three month's subscription is for free.
So since she recently become a Saint
Picture of her they decided to paint
Which will be hung up by them on a wall
And is so big it takes up a whole hall.