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A Hospital Stay Part IV

William Masonis Avatar William Masonis - Premium MemberPremium Member Send Soup Mail Go to Poets Blog Block poet from commenting on your poetry

Below is the poem entitled A Hospital Stay Part IV which was written by poet William Masonis. Please feel free to comment on this poem. However, please remember, PoetrySoup is a place of encouragement and growth.

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A Hospital Stay Part IV

                                                                  4.

                                                        The Slippage

All through the night of the day when the madness began
Fever comes to visit me.
In bed immobile,
Sheets dampen beneath my filthy hair
Shivering/Burning     Shivering/Burning
The night creeps on towards dawn
And no sleep preceeds it.

When at last it comes,
It marks the point at which
     Breathing becomes my sole occupation
     Tests define my days
     I and the medical machines
     Begin to merge.
New lines are attached daily;
Monitors, nutrients, fluids, blood.
In all directions they flow from me
Until my metal caretakers and I are so interconnected
That spongebathing becomes choreography.

     Meanwhile, outside
     Invisible killers roam at will,
     Dealing death and wounds
     Then moving on, like clouds across the sun.
     A seige mentality settles over the entire area
     The shadow of sudden, random death passes over all.

My personal shadow lies upon my lungs,
Quietly, steadily, pressing away my breath.

     The tests go on and on and on
     Blood is drawn 'til veins begin collapsing
     I feel like a prisoner of the Inquisition,
     Sustained solely by the spirit of those
     Good fortune makes my own:
     Wife, Children, Parents, Friends
     - All the best reasons, in short, to live -
     Never fail to help bear me up,
     Feeding me the honor of their concern.

     They fan me when I burn,
     Warm me as I shake with cold,
     Remind me of all the good
     Awaiting my return.

Then at last there fell the evil day
When they moved me back to the higher ward,
The place from which one usually does not return,
Chills washing me like Arctic waters,
Shaking like an epileptic
Fighting the mounting panic
As I gasp shallow breaths
Like a fish hauled aground.

Since that time I've seen it claimed
That suffocation brings the kindest death.

Whoever wrote that 
Had a strange view of kindness.

There followed a hard night of fear and confusion
That passed into a dawn I never saw nor felt.

At some undefined hour they wheel me back to Intensive,
As Gulliver's god slides off the wall ....
And everything comes to full stop.

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  1. Date: 8/24/2013 11:11:00 AM
    Thank you, Wm, for sharing these times with me. Ya know what I remember most about you, besides being the gentleman that you are, is that your poetry primarily had a metaphysical bent, and (the lady in the green dress) your wife, also shared your views. I think, just think, that what they meant about suffication being merciful is that, at a certain point, we lose consciousness. Perhaps that is best, to quell our fears, and you are right,

    Lindsey Avatar Catie Lindsey
    Date: 8/24/2013 11:13:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry


    Just remember... your Beloveds...are always just a heartbeat away... as close as your own thoughts...hugs... :)
    Lindsey Avatar Catie Lindsey
    Date: 8/24/2013 11:11:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry


    it is primarily the fear of being separated from our beloveds. I will be thinking of you, rereading some of my favorite poems by you, and certainly holding you up to the light at this time for healing. Love and hugs, Catie :)