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Star Trek and Captain Kirk's Final Frontier

Tim Ryerson Avatar Tim Ryerson - Premium MemberPremium Member Send Soup Mail Go to Poets Blog Block poet from commenting on your poetry

Below is the poem entitled Star Trek and Captain Kirk's Final Frontier which was written by poet Tim Ryerson. Please feel free to comment on this poem. However, please remember, PoetrySoup is a place of encouragement and growth.

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Star Trek and Captain Kirk's Final Frontier

Kirk: ‘Lt. Uhura, come to my quarters at 1800 hours’
Uhura: ‘Yes captain, might I ask what’s up?’
Kirk: ‘Nothing now but something WILL be at 1800 hours’
Bones: ‘Jim, is this a medical issue?’
Kirk: ‘You bet your boner it is, Bones’
Sulu: ‘Captain, a Klingon ship is approaching’
Kirk:  ‘Blast that sucker to smithereens, I got a date’
Chekov: ‘Captain, you’ll need protection on this mission’
Kirk: No problem Ensign, got a few here in my wallet’

Obi-Wan Kenobi: ‘May the force be with you’
Kirk:’ Thanks Obi, but you’re in the wrong contest’
Obi-Wan Kenobi: ‘This isn’t PD’s contest?’
Kirk: ‘HELL no, now SKAT will probably disqualify us’
Obi-Wan Kenobi: ‘Well, may the force be with you anyway’
Kirk: ‘Look Kenobi, nobody’s forcing ANYBODY here’

Spock: ‘Captain, I’m receiving a message from SKATfleet Command’
Kirk: ‘What Mr. Spock? And why do you always talk like that?’
Spock: ‘To qualify for the contest, the writer has to command the ship’
Kirk: ‘Damn it all! What the…FRONT AND CENTER WRITER!’
Writer: ‘Um…All hands on deck?...Anchors away?’

Uhura: ‘Ohh Captain KIRRK, it’s 1800 hours’…
Kirk: ‘Not now Uhura, I’m not in the mood!’
Uhura: Ohh Captain WRITERRR, it’s 1800 hours’…
Writer: ‘Kirk, you have the helm. I’ll be in my quarters’ 
Spock: ‘Fascinating’
Kirk: ‘Shut-up Spock’…

Tim Ryerson
Theme: Sexual harassment in the workplace
For SKAT’s contest


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  1. Date: 1/23/2014 11:35:00 AM

    I don't know how I missed this; but wonderful Tim! lol

  1. Date: 12/25/2013 4:08:00 AM

    Like this a lot Tony Kirk

  1. Date: 9/8/2013 6:03:00 PM

    funny stuff...congrats on your win

  1. Date: 9/8/2013 10:43:00 AM

    lol loved the way you pieced this one together....congrats on your win :)

  1. Date: 9/6/2013 8:57:00 AM

    Hola, Tim, The Star Trek fan :-)~ , a nice and awesome win... always looking forward in reading and following all your winning poems... Luv~ LINDA

  1. Date: 9/5/2013 9:09:00 PM

    man this surely rocks! had or having a big smile while reading this. . you bet this is going to my favourite Congrats on your win. Morgan

  1. Date: 9/5/2013 6:26:00 PM

    Hi Tim Tim, , CONGRATS! thank you very much for this one... love your entry.... enjoy my newest poem :) SKAT

  1. Date: 8/29/2013 6:29:00 PM

    This is so funny and great, Loved watching Star Trek, I still love William Shatner

  1. Date: 8/19/2013 9:53:00 AM

    You win hands down!... in my book. This was great! Live long and prosper!

  1. Date: 8/12/2013 1:52:00 PM

    Tim, this is hilarious!! I laughed out loud and can't stop smiling. You could write a spoof script for Star Trek, too bad Leslie Neilsen wasn't still alive to act in it. Awesome entry and write!

  1. Date: 8/9/2013 2:04:00 PM

    You did a great job with the theme...I like how you put in Obi....that was funny

  1. Date: 8/8/2013 7:35:00 PM

    Hahahaha, I'm still laughing!!! What's going on in that head of yours (lol)? You come up with the craziest writing. Right on, Mr Entertainer. YOU ROCK!!!!!!!!! Licia :-)

  1. Date: 8/7/2013 5:58:00 PM

    Oh my gosh.....I'm still laughing......:-) :-) :-) :-) :-) :-) I know just enough about these shows to know you did an awesome Job here Tim...better than alien vs predator! Haha

  1. Date: 8/7/2013 9:34:00 AM

    this is hilarious! well done!

  1. Date: 8/6/2013 7:37:00 PM

    Kirk: 'STAR TREK RULES!!!'...Writer: 'Shut-up Kirk, that's MY line'...