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Empty

Andrea Dietrich Avatar Andrea Dietrich - LIFETIME Premium Member Andrea Dietrich - Premium MemberPremium Member Send Soup Mail Go to Poets Blog Block poet from commenting on your poetry

Below is the poem entitled Empty which was written by poet Andrea Dietrich. Please feel free to comment on this poem. However, please remember, PoetrySoup is a place of encouragement and growth.

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Empty

When I talk to you. . . I'm talking to the wall
                                                                      to photos arranged
across from where you hung the paintings
made by your own two hands. 
           
                            Set behind the dusty glass of antiquated frames -
                                                the photos tell of family, heritage, and you
 in your youthful glory. . . of you with dark lush locks
                        that framed the face 
                          of a rose in bloom


When I talk to you. . . I'm talking to the birds -
    two sweet parakeets 
                                        now more than a decade old.
The cage is not as clean as it was             when you were in your prime
                                                                   and all was immaculate!
Now someone else is caring for these birds
which tilt their little heads and inquisitively 
                                                    peer at me
                                                       as if to ask: Are we supposed to understand?

                                       and silence
                                                 meets my ears.

When I talk to you. . . .I'm talking to the air.
It smells of
              antiseptics, and today           your room is stifling.


I push you
 in your wheelchair
    to the garden, where breath of spring                  awaits us.

I talk to you, but we                                  do         not          converse.
I look into your eyes                                 grown   pale.
                                 Their   empty   stare
seems fixed 
upon the roses.             I gently pluck one up
                             
                                      and place it in


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  1. Date: 2/4/2014 9:51:00 AM

    Beautiful...beautiful write Congratulations on the win

  1. Date: 2/3/2014 7:15:00 PM

    Oh la la!! Mrs Dietrich's talent has no boundaries! A terrific free verse! Hand-clapping on your win, Andrea!

    O. Avatar Ruben O. Date: 2/3/2014 7:16:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    It's in my favorites!!
  1. Date: 2/3/2014 6:49:00 PM

    aha, I had a sneaking feeling this one might be yours, andrea! I like how you have used the spacing to emphasize the words, and of course the poignancy of the subject matter makes it a winner with me - congrats on your win in my contest :)

  1. Date: 2/3/2014 5:35:00 PM

    Congrad's on your win. Fine free verse. Light & Love

  1. Date: 11/16/2013 7:36:00 AM

    The spacing between the words in the lines of this poem bring the imagery to life: "to the garden, where the breath of spring / awaits us." The white space, to me, represented the narrator and the character being embraced by the crisp, vivid brilliance of a spring day. Brilliant work.

  1. Date: 10/28/2013 5:57:00 PM

    Lovely poem you have written here Andrea.It made me feel quite sad, but I loved it, and the way it was laid out...Peter

  1. Date: 9/20/2013 10:22:00 PM

    Very artistic on this poem. I am all empty this week. It has been so busy and I am glad the weekend is here. Maybe get on to the second half of the deck. love phyl

  1. Date: 9/6/2013 10:38:00 AM

    Your use of line breakage and elliptic pauses is breathtaking. Your artful display of technique made the title of your poem exquisitely appropriate and beautiful. Also, thanks for your positive feedback regarding the poem I entered into Nathan's contest. My poetry is non-linear and visionary. And--more importantly--you seemed to have understood and felt that. Sincerely, Alex

  1. Date: 9/5/2013 3:45:00 PM

    nice layout Andrea... xox..Linda

  1. Date: 9/5/2013 1:02:00 PM

    Congrats on your great win..Sara

  1. Date: 9/4/2013 3:30:00 PM

    Sad. Touching. Well written. And someday, it may be us with the flower being stuck in our thinning hair. Nice job, Andrea. Well done.

  1. Date: 9/2/2013 8:18:00 PM

    I knew this tender, emotional poem could not help but place high! It really tugs at my heart! Well done, Andrea!

  1. Date: 9/2/2013 2:49:00 PM

    beautiful poem and pleasing to the eye congrats on your win Shadow x smiles

  1. Date: 9/2/2013 12:35:00 PM

    What a marvelous write to win in the Creative Layouts contest of Broken Wings on 8/31/2013. An skillfully written piece expected only from you Andrea. Thanks also for your warm message on the win of my poem My Pen. Surely I'll read your poem on this subject and learn a few things from you. Love. -Mohammad

  1. Date: 9/2/2013 8:00:00 AM

    wonderful write Andrea....congrats on your win

  1. Date: 9/1/2013 3:45:00 PM

    Another win!! You are amazing. Congratulations... Jack

  1. Date: 9/1/2013 1:42:00 PM

    Andrea, Congratulations on your awesome win....................... SKAT

  1. Date: 8/31/2013 8:46:00 PM

    you have painted this scene beautifully Andrea...sad but beautifully written...congrats on your big win :)

  1. Date: 8/25/2013 4:02:00 PM

    very sad..

  1. Date: 8/24/2013 9:04:00 PM

    spouse, children, parent... my personal take. great write and form ~lori

  1. Date: 8/20/2013 7:07:00 PM

    Very moving poem Petal, sadly we see more of this around nowadays. I suspect this will do very well in the contest. Take care, Richard

  1. Date: 8/18/2013 4:16:00 PM

    I see why this is in the top 100. Nicely done. Thank you for your visits and comments. Havent been commenting much. I have had a MRSA infection in my ear since July 16th and it wont go away. 2 months on antibiotics.Hope things are well for you. Love Colleen

  1. Date: 8/12/2013 9:48:00 AM

    oh btw, I posted a couple of poems-- one is in Filipino though, so it's ok if you don't read it since I didn't put a translation. The other is just depressing. Oops! So maybe you're better off not reading them, I am weird.

  1. Date: 8/12/2013 9:46:00 AM

    Shucks, Andrea-- your title says "Empty" but this sure is just full of emotion, of meaning and you just bring it on to the page-- I am digging how you formatted this one too-- adding another layer to the poem. I can't help but be reeled in here with you.... I agree with Charlotte-- your free verse can definitely be awesome! Sorry, pls I have to do a rain check on email :( I have to sleep. Just hugging you now, I can't help but just feel the sadness here...

  1. Date: 8/10/2013 12:44:00 PM

    (An adjective) always confused.... An adjective usually precedes the noun or the pronoun which it modifies..... ur " Avatar" with ur so beautiful creation (Poetry) does not match. hmm..... please clear.

    Dietrich Avatar Andrea Dietrich Date: 8/10/2013 4:34:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    I don't get what you are trying to say about my Avatar. As for the title, I did not want to call it "Empty" but the contest asks for us to title it how it makes us feel. so I chose empty.
  1. Date: 8/10/2013 6:36:00 AM

    Oh my! I am not sure what to say about such a stunning emotional poem. This is brilliant writing. It brought tears to my eyes.

  1. Date: 8/10/2013 5:25:00 AM

    andrea! can I believe my eyes? this is the lady who reckons she struggles to write free verse? you're writing like a seasoned free verser here, I love both the content and the layout, just wish I knew how to do these indented lines, can't figure it out, I learnt tabulation on an old manual typewriter! that's how antiquated I am haha and btw thanks for my 1st place in your contest, an honour, I've managed to locate one poem of mine that you've never seen, it's called 'still life' :)

  1. Date: 8/8/2013 2:44:00 AM

    This is so touching, gently and caring, though it my not be but it si reminded me of my dear mother inlaw who suffered alzimer, very nicely written blessings sueellen

  1. Date: 8/7/2013 6:43:00 PM

    This is sad and very heartfelt. I agree with Jack - it's a gem of a poem. Thanks for sharing.... Lucilla

  1. Date: 8/7/2013 4:26:00 PM

    this heartfelt gem is a sure winner, Andrea

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