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Fang Decay

Milton Toran Avatar Milton Toran - Premium MemberPremium Member  Go to Poets Blog Block poet from commenting on your poetry

Below is the poem entitled Fang Decay which was written by poet Milton Toran. Please feel free to comment on this poem. However, please remember, PoetrySoup is a place of encouragement and growth.

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Fang Decay

Dracula needed dentures,
That's the story I've been told
The man was getting up in age,
Nearly seven centuries old!

He refused to see a dentist,
While losing his fatal bite
He soon became a laughing stock,
Not a soul feared him at night!

The Transylvanian Drooler,
His newly appointed name
He lost his reputation,
His bite was rather lame!

Each time he'd suck a neck,
His victims failed to succumb
He had no fangs to penetrate,
For all he could do was "gum!"

No more humiliation!
It was time to buy some teeth;
His remaining shred of dignity,
Sank to the gutters beneath!

A brand new set of choppers,
Created a lovely smile
Soaring back to action,
Has always been his style!

Behold, another damsel,
How could she escape?
He swooped around the corner,
Binding her with his cape!

He took one mighty bite,
With very little effect
When he tried to pull away,
His teeth were stuck in her neck!

His face turned red as a beacon,
What a mockery to the undead
His victim cried with laughter,
Then smacked him across the head!

Dracula quit the business,
Heeding retirement's call
Suckin' down Bloody Marys,
Toothless and gummin' a straw! 

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  1. Date: 8/28/2013 3:36:00 PM

    What a great write, you are brilliantly funny, my friend. a good laugh first thing in the morning is appreciated, thanks Milt....Peter

  1. Date: 8/6/2013 1:13:00 PM

    This is hilarious, Milt! I love it. Going in my favs. Love, Kim

  1. Date: 8/2/2013 12:52:00 AM

    hahaha,you are pretty good with humor. Where the heck were you when I had my contest asking for humorous poetry? I could have used someone like you in my contest!!!

    Toran Avatar Milton Toran Date: 8/2/2013 12:55:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Thanks Andrea! Next time you have one, pick one out and I'll be more than happy to submit it. Just drop me a line when you're ready! God bless U!...Milt