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The Hermit Story poem

Lucilla Carrillo Avatar Lucilla Carrillo - Premium MemberPremium Member Send Soup Mail  Block poet from commenting on your poetry

Below is the poem entitled The Hermit Story poem which was written by poet Lucilla Carrillo. Please feel free to comment on this poem. However, please remember, PoetrySoup is a place of encouragement and growth.

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The Hermit Story poem

The Hermit There once was a young man- that fell deeply in love with a beautiful girl. she was too rich and not in his reach. They loved eachother, but their love could not be. her parents sent her away and their love vanished that day. He left and went far away. He isolated himself and a hermit he became. People knew about him, but they didn't know much. He had a brother that found out where he was. He would go to see him every now and then. The hermit lived in an old shack deep in the woods. his brother was very different from him. He smoke, drank, gambled and had many women. The hermit didn't think that was right, but his brother kepted on living his life. One day the hermit got very sick and couldn't go out to look for his food. An Angel came to see him and brought him some food. After that - the Angel would come everyday and fad him out of her hand. One day the brother came to see him and the hermit told him that he had to change his ways, or he would never go to heaven. He told him look at me - I have already won heaven. I don't have no sins. I eat out of an Angel's hand everyday. The brother said - that's good, but I have repented of my sins. That day the Angel left and never came back. The hermit died all alone. When he got to heaven - he was told, this is not where you belong. He asked - why not? You should never brag about yourself. The hermit was sent to hell. His brother repented and went to heaven. Life is not what it seems. Sometimes when we think we have gained something - in a minute - we can lose it all...
07/26/2013 Written by Lucilla M. Carrillo Note: Moral of the story is - no matter how good we think we are - we should never brag about it.

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  1. Date: 10/16/2013 8:12:00 PM
    Just stopping by to say Hi this evening it's been too long since I have read your fine verse. Light & Love

  1. Date: 8/7/2013 3:03:00 AM
    Great story, excellent message within, yes I agree with the moral of the story, well done I enjoyed the read, les sings sueellen

  1. Date: 8/2/2013 5:45:00 PM
    Great insight and wisdom you have shown here Lucy You are becoming a great storyteller AND another hilarious joke would be nice too! - Tim

  1. Date: 8/2/2013 11:36:00 AM
    Lovely story as usual Lucy you are the master of these writes. Take care, Richard

  1. Date: 7/31/2013 11:35:00 PM
    So true....So true. Beautiful wisdom in words well heard. :o)

  1. Date: 7/31/2013 4:00:00 PM
    This goes a long way...lessons learnt!

  1. Date: 7/30/2013 5:40:00 PM
    Thank yiou for your comment. I have written a spanish villanelle, but without anyone to really proof read, not sure if I will post. I like your story here. Good work

    Kithinji Avatar Gerald Kithinji
    Date: 7/31/2013 3:53:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry


    Please post it pronto. Vou tentar traduzir lo!
  1. Date: 7/30/2013 1:10:00 PM
    Lucilla, you always "catch" to me with your "story" poem .... Love it. - All the best to you my dear friend! - oxox / / Anne-Lise :)

  1. Date: 7/29/2013 1:38:00 AM
    Excellent. Lovely presentation. Truth is shown here. Enjoyed reading it. Tks

  1. Date: 7/27/2013 5:15:00 PM
    Super deep! This was quite the story you have written- definitely didn't fail to keep me thoroughly entertained! Well done. :)

  1. Date: 7/26/2013 11:35:00 PM
    Yes, this is how it goes. Like the prodigal son and other stories from the Bible . You are a modern parable giver!

  1. Date: 7/26/2013 5:46:00 PM
    This poem-story is as beautiful as you are inside and out Lucilla.....

  1. Date: 7/26/2013 2:58:00 PM
    Interesting story with a surprise ending..Enjoyed reading it...Thanks for your visit to my work..Sara

  1. Date: 7/26/2013 1:32:00 PM
    We are all never without sin, we need to be like the brother that repented for his sins, and be humble with the love and grace that was bestowed upon us! I really loved reading your ingenious tale that you have told! You have presented a glorious poem, full of truth! What a brilliant piece, Great Work!!

  1. Date: 7/26/2013 9:51:00 AM
    absolutely true." Sometimes when we think we have gained something - in a minute - we can lose it all.." Hermit is also a human.being. I ask myself many a time. should we lead a life closer to nature. or should we choose a life against the nature.

  1. Date: 7/26/2013 8:20:00 AM
    Life, sadly, can have a wicked sense of humor towards others. This was quite the story you told here. Lot of emotions embedded on & in between the lines.