It's funny how you wanted everything,
To slowly wanting nothing at all.
If you don't intend on catching me,
Please don't make me fall.
I still have a little hope.
I mean, you thought we could last.
Now everything is switched.
You think we're fading fast.
Sometimes I just feel numb.
Sometimes I cry at night.
This is all too much.
I don't want to continue this fight.
My life is frustrating me.
I fear how my heart will ache.
Small things continuously scare me.
And I fear soon I'll break.
I've been called selfish.
I've been told to "just go die"
If I had listened to that order,
Just imagine how much you'd cry.
I've been called bad things.
I've been called crazy and depressed.
I've been called attention seeking.
Been told I'm not "really" a mess.
I say "today is just not my day."
I think that's just always the case.
Putting up a mask is hard.
Don't always believe the ease in my face.
I have these really happy moments.
And it seems like they're always alone.
Unless these moments are with you,
In which case I feel very at home.
I get it now, things are different.
I got it, they're not the same.
But I'm not sure I understand.
Is it myself that I should blame?
I knew that this would happen.
I knew someone would get attached.
Most likely it'd be me.
Other girls I can't quite match.
I don't want to put in effort.
When I do, I feel I'm the one giving more.
Eventually being the only one is hard,
Eventually it makes you heart sore.
I can't tell you how this hurts,
I can't let you feel bad.
Contrary to other's beliefs,
I don't believe anyone deserves that.
I still think you deserve the world.
I love you to the moon and back.
And it's probably odd and sad,
but I'd go further than the moon if you asked.
I know what's slowly approaching,
I know that relationships end.
I just want you to know,
You're one of my best friends.