Hey! I am your long lost brother
Remember the one who moved over sea?
The one who always tormented you,
Made you fall and graze your knee.
The one who pulled the heads of your dollies,
Set fire to your dolls house
The one who accidentally while you were out
Killed your little pet mouse.
The one who called you silly names,
And sniggered at your fashion trends
The one who always went out of his way
To embarrass you in front of your friends
The one who told you fairies weren’t real
Until you cried and would then still persist
The one who broke your childhood dreams
When they told you Santa also didn't exist
Yes, I am your long lost brother
You know, the one who caused you great pain?
The one you really, really hoped
You would never see again