The mind is like a swinging door,
Opening and closing all the time.
It remembers everything good and bad.
Intrusions take over the mind if aloud.
But even though I know this well,
A fear erupts now and then from deep within-
Growing old, not dying, but living way too long,
Ending up in a nursing home lonely and forgotten,
Broken, walking-not, my freedom cut short,
Dependent on not myself, but hands of many strangers,
Cries are ignored, silencing my tears forcing them within
My numerous surgeries have deepened these fears.
I'm used to a spine fused too many times,
And legs weakened far too long.
What will happen to me
When I no longer can care for myself?
"Don't worry about tomorrow, enjoy today"
Hard to do when I allow my fears to override my thoughts.