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The Kitchen Fitter

Mandy Tams The Golden Girl Avatar  Send Soup Mail  Block poet from commenting on your poetry

Below is the poem entitled The Kitchen Fitter which was written by poet Mandy Tams The Golden Girl. Please feel free to comment on this poem. However, please remember, PoetrySoup is a place of encouragement and growth.

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The Kitchen Fitter

The Kitchen Fitter
As the wire set alight I cursed his low born name
Then he hit me with a bill and I said you go to hell.
To court he did take me, to pay he was going to make me.

The first appearance was a joke, the judge in squash shorts and a coat
He wanted time to read the papers thoroughly through and through

The kitchen fitter looked smug, but I said just watch your mug
He said, you will have to pay and I told him, no, no way
I said if you do proceed you will greatly regret this deed

The fitter laughed as he told me that he could have bought and sold me
But in court I was to have the last laugh on him.

I stood there and defended my reason not to pay
The judge looked bored to him this was just another day
I said that it’s a crime and for it the fitter should do time
And a counter case I proceeded to relay
Just ask the low born fitter what bad parts he used that day

I began.
 It is a criminal offence to take to court on some pretence
When you know that you don’t really have a claim
So I turned the tables on him, and the judge demanded to know
Hey you kitchen fitter, just what do you think is your game?
I proclaimed that he used faulty parts and that he knew it
And as the fire started their defence was gone because the fuses blew it
The judge decreed that I must succeed and he did proceed
To throw out the spurious claim for pay

I then related quietly that he had kept me up nightly
wondering how to put right the dubious work he did on that day.

The judge looked at me and he said oh I can guarantee 
That the kitchen fitter will now be the one to pay
There will be compensation and I make a declaration
That if he comes before me in any shape or form again

Not only will he pay but he’ll come to rue the day
That he ever set foot in this court and your name tried to defame.

 © 17/04 2013-04-17 Dragon, One Fitter Nil.
Contest entry: The Dragon Slayer Contest. True Story

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  1. Date: 6/13/2013 3:07:00 PM
    I don't think you understand the glee your blog took from me. I was happy to post that poem for you. Then I went back, and read Ruben's and Beccas comment. I hate what you did to me. Not all men have thick skin

  1. Date: 6/4/2013 10:54:00 PM
    Bravo Mandy, wonderful telling of this story, congratulations on a successful legal case.

  1. Date: 5/18/2013 8:49:00 PM
    Congratulations on your well deserved winning poem.. Hail Yeah! to all the dragon slayer winners :-) :-) :-) *LINDA

  1. Date: 5/17/2013 1:28:00 PM
    congrats on your win Mandy

  1. Date: 5/17/2013 12:35:00 PM
    Hooray for Mandy!!...And congratulations to Mandy too!! - Tim

  1. Date: 5/17/2013 8:58:00 AM
    Good for you..........!!! You won in more than one way!!! Congratulations!

  1. Date: 5/17/2013 5:51:00 AM
    congrats on your deserved number 1

  1. Date: 5/17/2013 2:31:00 AM
    Well done. Congrats on your win. Rick

  1. Date: 5/16/2013 8:59:00 PM
    Thank you for entering my contest

  1. Date: 4/21/2013 7:46:00 AM
    Interesting, Mandy. Good one!

  1. Date: 4/20/2013 7:08:00 PM
    Mandy the Golden Girl.... very entertaining, witty creative. Loved the fun This reminds me also of a poem I wrote (The King of Sanctimonious) I will have to post it sometime. Great Writing Skill!

  1. Date: 4/19/2013 2:57:00 PM
    wow, and I see it was true too! Great write, my friend x

  1. Date: 4/19/2013 1:48:00 PM
    Mandy...get em' gal! Entertaining as always!...have a good weekend!

  1. Date: 4/17/2013 5:40:00 PM
    hi my dearest Golden angel Mandy, very nice written ...enjoyed much your talent ..congratulation for the contest.. <3 much luv :) <3

  1. Date: 4/17/2013 10:50:00 AM
    we need more like you Mandy, there is a lot of Dragons out there, another wondrous poem from the Golden Girl..

    horsman Avatar harry horsman
    Date: 4/17/2013 4:44:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry


    yes it is,
    Tams The Golden Girl Avatar Mandy Tams The Golden Girl
    Date: 4/17/2013 11:27:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry


    Bless you harry , not to sure about this one being free verse xx