Submit a Poem
Get Your Premium Membership
spacer
Pinterest button
Comments Inbox

 

Cut Up Without You

long dark night
                 
you never say
                 
return to me

this orange bedroom

its open fire

crackling through acetylcholine

tongues like fingers

bodies arched

two spoons

smeared in oils
                    
red and umber

the drifting leaves

the streets advertise
       
allegorical objects

on a wall 
                          
not imagery

for leaving me 
                  
lost with innocence

and weeping 
                    
like the hunted

who flick up
                       
the window of

light-washed sky
               
against the tilted

patchwork fields
                
the falling landscape





written using the surrealist cut-up technique

Please Login to post a comment
 
  1. Date: 4/11/2013 10:39:00 AM

    Superbly intense piece. Heartstrings were pulled here...

  1. Date: 4/11/2013 6:47:00 AM

    Hi, Charlotte, just came here to see how you were.

  1. Date: 3/29/2013 6:22:00 PM

    Soupmail

  1. Date: 3/23/2013 12:32:00 PM

    CHARLOTTE, congratulations with your awesome and wonderful poem. Always~ Linda

  1. Date: 3/23/2013 9:12:00 AM

    Ditto on Ruben's comment--so skillfully crafted and a fun read--Thanks Charlotte!

  1. Date: 3/22/2013 8:44:00 PM

    I love your surrealistic cut-up technique, Charlotte! I love this poem and Im going to fav it! Excellent write ... one of the best in this list of winners! Congratulations on your win! Ruben.

  1. Date: 3/22/2013 7:03:00 PM

    I'd love to learn more about this form. Congrad's on your win. Light & Love

  1. Date: 3/17/2013 10:27:00 AM

    This arrangement speaks of being used or being left in a sad way. A very interesting form. Enjoyable to read it as an arranged puzzle.

  1. Date: 3/16/2013 5:58:00 PM

    Interesting, isn't it, how a random selection of phrases makes sense? I like to think of writing this way (I do too) analogous to collage in art. Nice work! Jack

  1. Date: 3/15/2013 12:50:00 PM

    Lovely poem!

  1. Date: 3/15/2013 1:06:00 AM

    It's very good. Nice seeing you here tonight, Charlotte. How goes it?

  1. Date: 3/14/2013 6:45:00 PM

    A deep and allegorical cut-up, Charlotte, it makes a great read. Glad that you liked IVF . To me too, yours was the most impressive of the lot in the challenge and the one i guessed right:) Jag