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The Darn Straight Truth
I was on the roof shingling;
When a bee lit on my nose.
With my hammer in hand I swung at it...
But, you already heard this, I suppose.
*****
Well, I was hoeing weeds in the garden;
A snake slithered up my pants.
I opened my front and started pullin’ it out,
My neighbor lady went into a trance.
*****
Last night, a cat strayed into my shed,
I was cleaning brushes with turpentine.
I bumped a jar... tipped it over,
... and splashed some on its behind.
Till then, things was quiet,
Then the fluid hit the mark
His eyes got big, he let out a scream,
I heard a crash as he shot into the dark.
A biker was laying on the roadway
Muttering, “a cat passed me having a fit.
I stepped off my bike doing sixty,
‘Cause I thought the engine had quit.”
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