Twas the night before Christmas, I say, in my gentle refrain.
Dear Santa had been busy, traveling the night, so very long.
He left us for last, as we were always gave him, a lot of pain.
No matter our good intentions, something always went wrong.
We surprised him with Carols, and he jumped back into the fire.
With so much magic, you’d think his clothes, wouldn’t singe so?
As our Great Dane jumped up, to kiss him, I thought he’d expire!
They fell into the tree, now entwined on the floor, so cute, all-aglow!
But the cat was a little pissed as he came out of the tree, you see…
And he attacked Santa for disturbing, his comfy good dreams.
I pulled the cat off, and falling on top, he accidentally got kneed.
Asking forgiveness, I offered a cookie, and he suddenly screamed.
The Great Dane had grabbed the cookie, while it was IN his hand!
Thank goodness, he’s a great, wonderful, and forgiving old man!
Last year, he’d ask the tree, be near his escape, a great game plan.
But he now got entangled in the big, hanging stockings, as out he ran.
He was choking, bright red, a good color on him, as we cut him free.
But he was dizzy and fell into the hot chocolate, and it’s warming pan.
So he jumped up and down, waving his arm, as he again, tried to flee.
Leaving, I heard him exclaim, ‘My day job is easier, I’m a stunt man!’
Still, next year he’ll be back, he says we’re nice, you see…
We just all understand, he’ll also be in a hurry to… leave.