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free verse 1

Christopher Pitts Avatar    Block poet from commenting on your poetry

Below is the poem entitled free verse 1 which was written by poet Christopher Pitts. Please feel free to comment on this poem. However, please remember, PoetrySoup is a place of encouragement and growth.

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free verse 1

this is my first time actually trying free verse. 
give me your thoughts, where i need improvement or what have you. 
any help is appreciated


we live in mingled symmetry 
with port holes in our face
stepping back we see the past
while stepping forward its gone again
you see the water rising slow
as if the ocean had swallowed us
dragging us down, further than we thought
but no one has yet to panic
we know the end must come
and come it shall

we looked into the waters depths
to see if its alright
the light has dimmed from the surface
not much is left to see.
a piercing shriek escapes the blue
and reaches inside our ships walls
we wont be back to the ones we loved
but panic we shall not

our blood stays warm in the face of this new threat
the water seeping passed the cracks of the boards
how the ship has withstood so much
none of us can be sure
intact it stays, as we hit the bottom
the cracks get larger with the force
a spray of salty ocean infiltrates
ignoring everything in its path.

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