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Safety Pin Security
safety pins are my new friends. they leave no blood traces
only scars
and i run my hands over the rough ridges
counting the moments before the last amen
in the prayers i can't seem to pray for myself any longer
because prayer takes belief
how did i get so old without the God i have always known to be true
just now pain is beauty. i can already feel your alarm as you read
these letters to my madness
and wonder if my madness is catching
this is why safety pins are my new friends
don't be my friend
don't be my love
don't be my salvation.
give me more safety pins
another stroke, another line
another welt, another scar
i am too afraid to tell my mother what happens behind my door
with safety pins
but i wish i was stronger. i want her to stop me
i don't want anyone to ever know
i run my hands over these rough ridges and count the moments before the last amen
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