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Haiku Twenty-something

Gwendolen Rix Avatar    Block poet from commenting on your poetry

Below is the poem entitled Haiku Twenty-something which was written by poet Gwendolen Rix. Please feel free to comment on this poem. However, please remember, PoetrySoup is a place of encouragement and growth.

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Haiku Twenty-something


mausoleum sits

damp and musty-

spider web dangles


front doors creek

foot steps echo-

teenagers giggle



 9-14-12
 By Gwendolen Rix


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  1. Date: 5/13/2013 2:35:00 PM
    Hey Gwendolen..this is one creaky/ creepy write I 'must say' it reminds of some places visited.. Needles to say one hotel like that is enough for a lifetimes experience of stays.. hope you are well Joe..)

  1. Date: 10/4/2012 8:44:00 PM
    nice haiku Gwen....left me in suspense...what happens next....hugs...

  1. Date: 10/1/2012 7:52:00 AM
    Dear Gwendolen, Everything comes around. If I were the corpse I'd love the giggles. love, Kathy

  1. Date: 9/27/2012 7:04:00 PM
    this is awesome. Makes me wonder what else recent of yours I have missed. Soupmail.

  1. Date: 9/27/2012 7:18:00 AM
    Lovely write! Thanks for your comments on my Clerihew( A Genius in my Home).

  1. Date: 9/25/2012 6:46:00 AM
    Yes, the wonder years, reliving days of beers and fears. Our nieve ways of knowing nothing. When we were young and twenty- something. Loved taking the journey down memory lane with you Gwen. Have a lovely today.

  1. Date: 9/23/2012 8:20:00 PM
    I love your descritions and the images you've created. I can so much visualize it all before me as I read you. Very poignant and absolutely cleverly crafted.

  1. Date: 9/19/2012 5:56:00 AM
    I know you've strayed from the traditional haiku, but I fell you've captured the essence of the form very well, this is a very enjoyable piece on many levels.

  1. Date: 9/16/2012 7:19:00 PM
    Hopefully this is the right one [duck] it seems more halloweenie? [a mausoleum/ sits damp and musty--webs dangle] try for short LONG short..this is a haiku :) [do not be afraid of the little words the 'articles' a, the, an etc.] the front door creeks/as foot steps echo--teens giggle] see how th [as] gramatically joined line 1 and 2 and creeks acts as the verb..so in its simplist form a haiku has a subject line 1, and action line 2 & additional scensory input line 3! Gwen did it! Light & Love

  1. Date: 9/15/2012 11:35:00 PM
    A truly meaningful Haiku Gwendolen, no easy accomplishment - I am suprised at how many angles of interpretation I can stride into from this marvel of brevity - reincarnation, chakras, robust imagery, religious rites, age manifesting suddenly, and oh, what are those kids up to? J.A.B. %

  1. Date: 9/15/2012 5:10:00 PM
    Very good haiku Gwen!Specially 2nd one.

  1. Date: 9/15/2012 2:41:00 PM
    I love this witty haiku, Gwendolen - and just love the title too, lol

  1. Date: 9/14/2012 5:27:00 PM
    For teens, even mausoleums are laughing matter ....nostalgia about days when life brims with love and laughter!! jag

  1. Date: 9/14/2012 10:59:00 AM
    Coolio, creepy-crawly haiku here, Gwendolen. Mausoleums and cemetaries are absolutely grand. May the Light of Lucifer shine upon you always. Ahwomen and Ahmen.

  1. Date: 9/14/2012 10:29:00 AM
    I giggled a bit I also ...... good Gwen. - I wish you a good weekend. - Oxox love Anne-Lise :)

  1. Date: 9/14/2012 9:55:00 AM
    Such lovely memories, enjoyed your haiku Gwen, love and light vie

  1. Date: 9/14/2012 9:47:00 AM
    not unlike my childhood, love these, Gwen, wonderful Haiku's

  1. Date: 9/14/2012 8:59:00 AM
    And the pumpkin man runs at the teenagers and scares them to death! This is quite the fun write my friend! I really enjoyed your creativity with this incredible poem full of delight and intrigue...awesome piece Gwendolen! Great Work!!

  1. Date: 9/14/2012 7:47:00 AM
    My sister and I lived near a mausoleum and it was the centerpiece of most teenage dares! :)