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ON CREEPY HILL

Maria Paz Samelo Avatar  Send Soup Mail  Block poet from commenting on your poetry

Below is the poem entitled ON CREEPY HILL which was written by poet Maria Paz Samelo. Please feel free to comment on this poem. However, please remember, PoetrySoup is a place of encouragement and growth.

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ON CREEPY HILL

In a far away secluded place
There’s a hill known for its beauty
But lies a secret that finally revealed
Its haunted, its creepy… wants to know the story?

There were five 4th graders
Joined in the field demonstration in school
They needed fine branches to form a shape
That hill they choose because it’s the nearest
And decided to go there before the sunset

The distance is one kilometer so they walked happily
Before going up to the hill they’ve felt uneasy
Because once they heard that at the top lies a dead body
But they still continue their journey anyway
And saw a wrecked bamboo hut was empty

Going further inside the creepy hill
One girl was beaten by some sticky spider
Everybody were afraid and shouted 
They also heard people laughing at the end

The 4th graders looked at each other and wondering
What they were doing at six in the evening at the wrecked hut?
Three people, two pretty women and one handsome man
Wearing white and seated on a dirty and old bench
They looked enchanting but the children were afraid 

When three people looked at the children they smiled and asked;
“What are you doing here? Its’ getting dark, you’ve supposed to go home”
Shocked for the question they didn’t answer but run as fast as they can
One girl lost her slipper while going down on the hill so she cried hard
They keep on running even if their feet were tired…they were so scared	
The voices were still echoed in the air as they keep running

When they reached home, all of them told the shocking story
Their parents confirmed that hill is haunted for many years already
It’s the city of unknown people because they heard it many times
The children were chilled by the news and wailed 

The five 4th graders never attempted to go there for more than 30 years
But the experienced they truly can’t forget for the rest of their lives
Its Halloween month at that time and its Halloween night indeed
No trick and treats, no pumpkin, no costume but a real experience
The people leaving there know the story and nobody dare to go up
How about you? Want to try to go to the creepy hill too?



Date written: September 5, 2012

Note: the girl who lost her slipper was ME 






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  1. Date: 11/10/2013 5:35:00 PM

    you brought the hill to life wonderfully...i think i'll stay away from that hill....congrats on your win :)

  1. Date: 11/10/2013 4:41:00 PM

    Cool is the word to describe this free verse, and congrats on your win, Maria. G.

  1. Date: 11/10/2013 9:13:00 AM

    congrats on your win Maria

  1. Date: 11/10/2013 12:52:00 AM

    Congrats on the win, Maria

  1. Date: 11/9/2013 6:38:00 PM

    wow, it is so cool to learn this is based on a true story. it was one of the scariest of the entries. BIG congrats for your well deserved win. It gets first place with me.

  1. Date: 11/9/2013 5:14:00 PM

    Maria, Congratulations on your awesome Halloween win. Love ~ SKAT~

  1. Date: 11/14/2012 7:55:00 AM

    Congratulations on your win in Nathan's "Free Verse Writers" contest Maria. Love, Carol

  1. Date: 11/13/2012 7:56:00 AM

    Wow too creepy for me , well done and congratulations xx

  1. Date: 11/12/2012 6:07:00 AM

    Creepy Hill..... Lucky we are over here .. we have no hills where creepy "atmospheres' rule... But I do like your creepy hill just for reading "... A well deserved win :+) Ellie Daphne

  1. Date: 11/11/2012 11:29:00 PM

    MY HEARTY CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR AWESOME WIN MY FRIEND! love/hugs, LG

  1. Date: 11/11/2012 11:18:00 PM

    CONGRATS MARIA ON A PHENOMENAL WRITE AND WIN FOR FREE VERSE LUV .. AMAZING WORK

  1. Date: 11/11/2012 7:28:00 PM

    ' Good win' Nate

  1. Date: 9/6/2012 6:04:00 AM

    Hoping you continue to find the inspiration to write and share your wonderful poetry with us Maria. I enjoyed reading your poetry this morning while I am having a cup of coffee and starting my day with a smile. Love, Carol

  1. Date: 9/5/2012 10:07:00 AM

    Wow!! It's a very beautiful story my dear!!! Congratulations on a great write! Good luck to you in the contest!!!

  1. Date: 9/5/2012 10:03:00 AM

    enjoyed your story, creepy though