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PLEASE Don't Hit Me When You Read This Vienna

Tim Ryerson Avatar Tim Ryerson - Premium MemberPremium Member Send Soup Mail Go to Poets Blog Block poet from commenting on your poetry

Below is the poem entitled PLEASE Don't Hit Me When You Read This Vienna which was written by poet Tim Ryerson. Please feel free to comment on this poem. However, please remember, PoetrySoup is a place of encouragement and growth.

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PLEASE Don't Hit Me When You Read This Vienna

I find it disgusting the way that you snore
That snort when you laugh I truly abhor
So tired of you burping up food after lunch
When you nag I get fever and chilly goose-bumps
I HATE that you gossip, it's a shameful disgrace
(I'm scared of that mole on the side of your face)
You took all my money and now I'm flat broke
and the way that you dress? Good LORD what a joke!
So I'm kicking you out! Go pack up your stuff!
(If this is a nightmare, PLEASE wake me up)

Sometimes I stay up just to watch as you sleep
The way that you laugh sweeps me clean off my feet
Love those cute little hiccups after you dine
and your kind suggestions keep my ego in line
You listen politely when someone else speaks
(I ADORE that beauty mark there on your cheek)
The investments you made were wise and worthwhile
and your unique outfits show a grand sense of style
If you ever leave me, I'll kick and I'll scream
What else can I say? You're this old boy's dream

For Vienna's 'Let me have it then kiss my petunia' contest

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  1. Date: 10/23/2012 5:34:00 PM

    You sure are rockin' the couplet form cher..how about trying a 3 liner for me? XXOO Light & Love

  1. Date: 8/31/2012 5:22:00 PM

    Hi Tim, you are likely to get a bop on the head with the first and a rush of romance for the second. Love how you dissect the two!

  1. Date: 8/28/2012 8:13:00 PM

    Wow, I'm bowled over by your two opposing sides here. Nice work and the very best of luck to you in the contest. A delightful read, Tim. :)

  1. Date: 8/28/2012 12:21:00 PM

    LOL, love the fun of the first stanza and sweetness of the second, Tim. Congrats on all your wins, my friend : )

  1. Date: 8/28/2012 4:05:00 AM

    charming write that sets the tone of your winsome thoughts, tim.. winning wishes and super huggs!..:)

  1. Date: 8/27/2012 2:05:00 PM

    good one, funny!!

  1. Date: 8/26/2012 11:11:00 AM

    Tim - Will the real whoever please stand up? Great poem. love, Kathy

  1. Date: 8/22/2012 5:40:00 PM

    tim, I hope you realize the poem under which you just left me a message was not a constanza. I was not sure from the way it read. My blog is in the blog section in case you never saw it yet. The black diamond night is a triolet. A long time ago I actually did a triolet contest. I adore triolet and have written many. I have only written one constanza poem in my life.

  1. Date: 8/22/2012 5:15:00 PM

    the guys on Soup are having too much fun with this one. hahaha. I haven't seen many women doing it. I just don't have a clue. I need to get really creative or I can't hold a candle to one like this. About my constanza, I gave a very detailed lesson on doing it at my blog.

  1. Date: 8/22/2012 5:15:00 PM

    i meant constanza contest, the constanza is a form of connie Marcum Wong.

  1. Date: 8/22/2012 12:10:00 PM

    your wit is beyond relief, tim ..lol.. enjoyed the progression of thought and the sly images.. vie will surely rate this well!..:) hugggs!

  1. Date: 8/22/2012 7:43:00 AM

    I think she'll love it Tim, well written a joy to read, good luck. in contest

  1. Date: 8/22/2012 5:51:00 AM

    Tim, either she will love it or start running now, the former I think....David

  1. Date: 8/22/2012 5:40:00 AM

    I loved this and so will Vie.. nice entry good luck have a great day.. cory