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Commandment Battlement - Part One -

Justin Bordner Avatar Justin Bordner - Premium MemberPremium Member Send Soup Mail Go to Poets Blog Block poet from commenting on your poetry

Below is the poem entitled Commandment Battlement - Part One - which was written by poet Justin Bordner. Please feel free to comment on this poem. However, please remember, PoetrySoup is a place of encouragement and growth.

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Commandment Battlement - Part One -

Better to be bold in battle
then benign in retreat!
No victory comes from actions prattle;
May honor be found in refusing defeat -

My vaults will not be breeched
by faults,
may we have a merry waltz
devoid of all unsavory salts,
this of you I have beseeched -

On this table we have met to render fable
rich as ancient Babyl,
heralds of ancestral heros and our forces' label,
bulwarks raised above this field's haze,stalwart gaurds strong and poised,
daunting sounds of ritual carols,the primal ones that spirits praise,
what is this match but a moment for atonement,
trite tribute and humble homage if you wicked will foment,
my battalions and I are stolid,faithful,our souls not being rent,
the birds in sky like personal medallions signify for we,victory is meant,
in the center sentries stood,subterfuge,lethal blows I knew you would,
a Queen as envoy repelled rudely,religiously crude as you brood,
armistice you will seek knowing bleak the future be,
like battered egos quiet speak,loosing strength,you shall weep and sneek
to snatch the proud prey from eagle's beak,your pommel being sweaty sleek,
terrified of the Promeathean peak,of my glory you may peek,

The mellow march of my bagpipes,a pallid pitch that makes men creep
they like leary sheep my wolves will eat,
must you trust a God of glutton lust,and savor his decree,
of Athena I have asked,athwart this army made by brass,
as broken glass shattered fast it shall yeild to Her Mass,
shaken soldiers running past,your eyes will cry the slaughters vast,
pray not in vain to block our rasp,or for this fauna you'll be mast,
my blood as Emperor say you crave,oh how brave,
like a slave made the day his grave was paved,
such a man is never saved,

J.A.B. Part One -

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  1. Date: 9/29/2012 9:02:00 PM
    ((continue)) How did you know the picture. Okay, I'm off the subject again... lol.. If you go to the soups contest. I have a contest I posted last night. Called.. "Spoil me with -UNICORN POEMS-" Click on my contest.... and scroll down the page.. I added the picture on there just for you... always~ your friend LINDA

    Bordner Avatar Justin Bordner
    Date: 9/30/2012 12:21:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry


    This marvelous image you posted coincided with a couple of ancient symbol concepts that I have had in my mind for a few months now in regards to my studies - and I have an affinity for strange & powerful women - I accept your contest invitation, and friendship with zeal Linda - J.A.B. %
  1. Date: 9/29/2012 8:59:00 PM
    ((continue)) I would like to see how your pen, does with a poem, that has nothing to do with reality. I want magic from your pen. You know a land of rainbows... PLEASE...please!! Okay, now I'm starting to sound like a kid. Okay, here's the deal. I love your all your comments. I bragged about you in a past blog. You are the only that got my avatar right. She is mystical, surrounded by a lake of fire. With a horn on the center of her forehead. Tell me, do you play EQ. Just wondering. ((continue))

    Bordner Avatar Justin Bordner
    Date: 9/30/2012 12:12:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry


    I have ample magic for you my Sphinx - I am not familiar with this EQ. game, but if you are enthralled by it then it must be quality -
  1. Date: 9/29/2012 8:54:00 PM
    Hi, Justin, your poem is great... I was wondering about your poetry. I see you are a poet who takes his writes with the dignity of truth. ((in which I love)) . The ending to this part, captured my thoughts on how life will always be over powered by sin. Ok, the real reason I'm here. I have a contest... And I was wondering since you are one of my new favorite poets. Would you like to honor me with a Unicorn poem for my upcoming birthday.. ((continue))

    Bordner Avatar Justin Bordner
    Date: 9/30/2012 12:08:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry


    Absolutely PD. - I'll compose a masterpriece for you, because I respect you immensely - your spirit excites me - J.A.B. %
  1. Date: 8/21/2012 9:11:00 PM
    Excellent! Will continue the next part of this epic and enlightening read. Always, Laura

    Bordner Avatar Justin Bordner
    Date: 8/23/2012 5:04:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry


    I am grateful for your esteemed appreciation Laura - J.A.B.
  1. Date: 7/28/2012 12:48:00 PM
    Amazing write...it's meaning and intent really strikes a chord to the demise of humanity and the ending of days.God's war is on

    Bordner Avatar Justin Bordner
    Date: 7/30/2012 5:58:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry


    Perhaps the Time is right for settling grievences Anne - J.A.B.
  1. Date: 7/27/2012 5:39:00 PM
    I like how you are attempting to use internal rhyme. Nice alliteration too & metaphor. PROOF READ ;) Have to use the spell checker! line 2 [retreat] what is [actions prattle]? line 7 [Babel] Light 7 Love

    Bordner Avatar Justin Bordner
    Date: 7/28/2012 11:50:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry


    I should "Proof Read" more often Debbie,my spelling when using keypads can be horrendous - Thanks - J.A.B.
    Bordner Avatar Justin Bordner
    Date: 7/27/2012 10:44:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry


    I welcome your suggestions debbie,thank you - It is a good thing that I'm not attempting to make money on my poetry! I 've never used spell checker,or a thesaurus in my craft though,just don't need 'em - "actions prattle" translates into "talking the talk,but not walking the walk" -prattle is a word meaning: trifling or childish talk - "Babyl is an archaic use for the noun Babel - Thanks - J.A.B.
  1. Date: 7/25/2012 5:34:00 PM
    You are a prince of metaphor and symbolism, Justin! A write of the ultimate Good versus the Horror of evil? The latter feels he is supreme thus the "leary sheep my wolves will eat".:( God, Jesus and His Angels, we will pray for a better outcome! Justin, this is a brain banger! Best wishes, Mikki

    Bordner Avatar Justin Bordner
    Date: 7/26/2012 10:38:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry


    Lets get it done together my friend! your compliments raise my spirit - I always give thanks to Deity & Providence - I'm thrilled you like this composition Mikki; means alot to me! J.A.B.