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Afrika

Caroline Youngless Avatar  Send Soup Mail  Block poet from commenting on your poetry

Below is the poem entitled Afrika which was written by poet Caroline Youngless. Please feel free to comment on this poem. However, please remember, PoetrySoup is a place of encouragement and growth.

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Afrika

For Herda & Wangugi

To become a man he has a difficult task:
he must be brave enough to kill a beast.
A tradition in his tribe, you may ask.
The boy is not fierce, strong, or fast in the least.

The boy has hardly a weapon, hand-made, and surely not a gun:
but a long stick with a sharpened tip, a spear.
This is the tradition, such hunting calls for a shun
from the village if the task is not complete, that is clear.

The lion is too fast, the boy cannot outrun it.
The boy must be silent; the lion is too strong,
and has spotted the boy, it picks up it's speed.
The boy was not careful; the lion too strong.

There is a stuggle, but the boy has killed the lion.
The boy is now a man in his village.

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  1. Date: 4/25/2012 6:42:00 PM

    You tell such important tales and bring us where we may never have gone, the content is excellent to improve the form I would gift you this TRY to improve your meter [the rise and fall of your voice] try to stick to a 10-12 syllable count per line. It has been a joy to read your verse this eve. Light & Love

    Youngless Avatar Caroline Youngless
    Date: 4/25/2012 6:47:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry


    Thank you Debbie. Some of these poems on here still need revising. I was playing with this one some, it's not yet complete. I enjoy hearing your insight. <3 C.R.Y.