It's like nobody knows me, or
Maybe nobody cares.
It's like I'm alone, so empty,
Though I'm surrounded by empty stares.
I try to be grateful.
I try not to be rude, but
It's as though the gifts and thoughts for me
Are filled with self-gratitude
From the giver, into the solitude.
I search deep within me.
I just cannot find
The answers buried in my heart, and
The truth behind the excuses in my mind.
I fall helplessly into misunderstanding.
I see myself so spiteful and demanding.
I hate the way I am;
I hate the way I've been.
I hate the way I'm feeling.
There is no defense.
Someday I will figure out
Everything confusing me inside.
Today is not that day.
Right now is not the time.