Used to wonder how you are.
Now I know all I need to.
Was afraid you'd be consumed with fire
while I didn't cross your mind at all.
Guess I was just work to you,
you couldn't see the person.
I was just another crazy falling apart in your hands on the couch.
You'd put me back together telling me I'm unique, beautiful and unusual.
The nerve I must have had to believe you.
Your house was a haven
and your face was peace.
Once I'd given in, you learned the secret
and it wasn't hard,
wasn't hard to tell I loved you.
Now I've got empty pockets and a suspicious heart
but you can always smirk
when you think back to the girl
who thought you had a heart.
You're not half the man she thought you were.
Someone will read this and say Joy, this should be discussed
put in its place,
spoken face to face.
Should I really have to say it hurt
when from you I never got a visit,
never got a call,
never got *crap*,
no, nothing at all
when my mother stopped breathing?
Hardest time of my life
and everyone sold me for a song
and were nowhere around.
Now if I passed you on the street, you'd hardly notice
and the former things would not be called to your mind,
I will do what I'm good at and smile.
This is just a cycle you clockwork through.
I was just a patient on your long, long list.
Well, doc, thanks but I'll cure myself.
I'm worth much more than a song.
I'm twenty, God **** two
still have growing up to do
without you, without people like you.