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my memory album

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my memory album

Last night I took apart the album I made for you
the one of our family before they left
before the sorrow clung to your every breath.

I separated each memory from their plastic sheath
and piled them in categories known and before me.
Military and quick I added the ones I found
from the folders covered in dust.

Each picture memorized to me
from the years of gazing and longing
for our life that couldn’t be.

I put them in one of my families new set.
To place on the book shelf to show them
the life they chose to forget

As I lay in bed last night they wafted through my eyes
like wraiths to drain my mind.
The tears never came, years have brought a drought
that leaves my husk parched as the shells
we found and used in the first album.

I lay beside my husband waiting for slumber
to erase the days I could not live
and the nights I dreamed about them.
I waited for the dust to creep and settle 
this grieving part of me to sleep

This morning the day is new and responsibility awaits.
Anxiety shadows my chest
Like the wraith of the past I try to forget.

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