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www.poetrypoem.com/shadowfiend

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Below is the poem entitled www.poetrypoem.com/shadowfiend which was written by poet Troy Nelson. Please feel free to comment on this poem. However, please remember, PoetrySoup is a place of encouragement and growth.

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www.poetrypoem.com/shadowfiend

years of writing and learning
working
guts spilled
heart ripped out
torn to holes
stabbing myself open
and spreading myself thin

learning this about that thing
this thing about that stuff
computer whizz i am not
but one comes along
and i am forever lost in the shuffle of the game 
playing with myself
solitaire with levels
puzzles with destinations to surf the web to give
my writing a new purpose

lead you here to find where else for you to go to find the next puzzle to ponder and 
meaning of it all
as if I'm some genius
unfinished puzzle
I've been shut down
and how do i explain this to my children
walking in my crutches
who cannot afford to be read one more time
as i whine in the midst of my goose chase
of level three leading you back to level one

and my space is just a place to look for something to do
top point at the famous players and how i got my foot in the door
and how they know me one day
and I'm not shy to get my attention whether I'm good or not
i have something to say
we are a community and I'm here for the life of fun and games
I'm here for the utopia
why does it have to be like a bully ruled school yard of conviction where no one 
knows who they think they are
and no one is worrying about who questions anybody
and laugh at estimations
of underestimating thew jobs we never apply for

fingers pointing over here and over there and nothing left to lose
so was it worth it
when now i cant sign in due to scandal
i cant fix any perfected mistakes due to friends who know pass codes that affect 
me still
tight lips are sinking my ship and the truth be told
the police wont get involved
just thought you should know I'm in the Center of nothing
spiraling out to place to find if i can be
where none will ever go

a journal of the one who was everything written of emotion from gods joke 
to inspiration to writers and communicating generation gaps
and now its all lost because of hate crimes we cant solve and peoples 
paranoias of technology and phishing scams
cant sell my work anymore or access my pay pal
years of work not backed up 
lumpy lessons served with lemon aid
 just go surf and see the game 
do the pieces fit
of the head strong ahead of his timer terrified false prophet goose chase
inter net hacked shut down?
something to think about for you!!

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