Slacker Poems

P Q R S T U

...Prophet predicted priceless profit for Pree
***** prophecy if you ask me
Revitalized my cousin though said Dee
Saccharine suggestion motivated lazy she
Tickling this ragamuffin terrifically
Ulti...

Easier To Run

...Am I a coward because I’m afraid?
My time is up and there’s dues to be paid.
And now my welcome seems long over-stayed.
So, what do I do?
I can see just where I’m supposed to be
But I can’t conq...

i went into a book shop and asked, 'where do you keep the bibles?'

...yeah, i went in
and i picked up a novel and took it to the counter
she said, "oooh, i do like this one. so heartbreaking and inescapable.
it's about being dislocated from friends and numbing routi...

Mother Grimm

...Mother loves her darling, infant girl. 
Mother must protect her from such a callous world. 
In a world full of heart break and pain we must count the cost. 
Plus each day is just another day lost....

The Packer's Weed Whacker

...Mrs. Packer bought a weed whacker
So, her husband could trim the grass
But he was a slacker
Thus, ever after
The whacker was out of gas...

Christmas With Honey

...Honey, it's almost Christmas
and you're such a slacker
do I have to call Nicky
to give me an answer.
The elves are so antsy
to hear the bells ring.
Honey, it's only money
did You buy Me some B...

Dire Desire To Meet Vampire

...About Herschel Walker

did have desire
had mentioned a vampire
conditions are dire

patience wearing thin
level of an Olympian
werewolf was in din

was so much suspense
discovered that he ...

A Carrot Cake Tributary Visit

...the fence is now made of rust
the patio now has a see through floor
the grass is now a mirror for the aging sun
the trees are now all skeletons in the unfortunate name of abandonment

the clothe...

Intermission Fool - Cafeteria Monitor

...Can I go to the bathroom? This place is full of jackasses. This place is full of jackasses jerking each other off. This place is full of ignorant, parochial, zit-sucking jackasses undeserving of thei...

Panic At the Food Bank

...When Cowardice and Sloth shook hands,
their deal produced a special breed 
of thief whose basic low-risk plans
to victimize the ones in need
required no smarts and little speed.

This slacker w...

Watch Out, Bullies

...If I and my poems were dissed
by those deemed elite--just dismissed,
I’d be so mature.
Their barbs I’d endure—
unless I should get REALLY p_ _ _ _ _! 

My sarcastic quips might be flyin...

Enough Has Been Enough

...Enough Is Enough Horn Haiku

enough is enough
trump really was terrible
so we should impeach

completely absurd
totally denigrating
should get rid of trump

had been Bellau Wood
soldiers w...

Theres a Squirrel In the Vending Machine

...There’s a squirrel in the vending machine,
I’ll bet that he thinks he is very keen.
He’s eating up all of the jelly beans!
He’s the worst irritant that I have seen.

He’s devoured all...

Georgia Cracker Who Was a Hacker

...a Georgia cracker
who really had been hacker
also some slacker

Jim Horn

Where is your sense of humor
in suspense and very dense?...

While In Deep Sleep Revelation of Matthew Scott Woke

...I surmise yours truly i.e. me
a slacker boomer - ye,
whereby repose finds me
face buried in pillow free
and clear of Earthly worry

mainly, namely, particularly...
lack of legal tender re: mon...

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