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Contains Poems - Poems about Contains

Premium Member Yeah, I know my poetic oeuvre contains a fair bit of junk
Yeah, I know my poetic oeuvre contains a fair bit of junk. But you know what? Even God created something called a skunk. In the works of all unparalleled thinkers, you can expect to find quite a few genuine stinkers ~ most art never attains great heights ~ most just immediately goes kerplunk. Bonus verse I don't take myself too seriously. If...

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Categories: contains, art, humor, poetry, writing,
Form: Light Verse
Premium Member WARNING THIS POEM CONTAINS TOILET HUMOUR
A poet, that's me I'm called Jan Was NEVER a poetry fan Now two books bear my name Not for fortune or fame I'll pen poop whenever I can! If ever I am stuck for words I resort to write about turds Brown things that you poo When you're sat on the loo Poop poetry's not just for nerds! ...

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Categories: contains, humorous, me, poetry,
Form: Limerick



The Locksmith
It's an honourable profession to be a locksmith by trade I've done it for years and my work is A grade I'm not one to boast but I say constantly That I've made every key there can possibly be Car keys, skeleton keys, master keys, house keys You name it I've done it, I can make them with ease That was...

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Categories: contains, humor,
Form: Rhyme
Premium Member Morning Glory - Contains Innendo - Bawdy
The farmer’s cock rises each morning It signals a new day is dawning His wife ignores him in bed Says she’s got a bad head Perhaps she requires pre-warning NB I BREAK NO RULES POSTING BAWDY LIMERICKS - THE FORM IS BY NATURE ALLOWED TO BE RIBALD AND I GIVE WARNING THE POEM MAY CONTAIN INNUENDO 07/08/21...

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Categories: contains, humorous,
Form: Limerick
Premium Member Teething Troubles - Scared Witless - Warning Contains Humour
The dentist’s poised wearing his gown I’m anxious, my face wears a frown He’ll pull out my tooth (Assisted by Ruth) I’m thankful my panties are brown! He powered up his dental drill The noise from it made me feel ill Bad tooth he requires He’ll pull it with pliers Then present me with a huge bill Of dental issues I’m now wary - I find...

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Categories: contains, health, humorous,
Form: Limerick



Premium Member The Great British Pancake Day Toss Off - Warning Contains Innuendo
Today it’s Pancake Day and there’s to be a pancake race Entrants are on the starting line with a smile upon their face Old Ted ‘s ready with his frying pan, he is a fat old josser but when it comes to pancakes, Ted’s an expert tosser The gun goes BANG and off they go, Ted’s busy tossing away busty...

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Categories: contains, food, humorous, race,
Form: Couplet
Premium Member She Wears Jimmy Phews - Warning Contains Humour
A lady I knew called Griselda Collected shoes just like Imelda* But she’d such cheesy feet When she walked down the street Folk secretly called her Ismelldya! *Imelda Marcos owned at least 1200 pairs of shoes NB After being on the site for over 7 years people are well aware of my style and love of writing the limerick form. If i...

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Categories: contains, how i feel, humorous,
Form: Limerick
Premium Member Little Willy - Warning Contains Innuendo
Out shopping, I meet Uncle Billy I exclaim can I stroke your willy Feel free to pet him He says with a grin My willy’s quite cold brr its chilly I kneel down and give Willy a stroke And juggle his brown balls for a joke Willy’s a rescue pet Billy got from the vet My uncle’s a dachshund loving bloke! 10/19/20...

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Categories: contains, humorous,
Form: Limerick
Premium Member The Knickerless Vicar - Contains Innuendo :- Collaboration With Nina Parmenter
For a man of the cloth, our dear vicar is not very partial to clothes He is almost allergic to trousers and y-fronts get right up his nose. Ev’ry Sunday as he climbs in the pulpit (where the choir boys are sitting below) His meat and two veg are seen swinging And it’s proof that he is commando The ladies who bake and...

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Categories: contains, clothes,
Form: Rhyme
Premium Member Poetry Contains Revolutionary Power
Yes it does! Poetry contains Revolutionary Power It can alter landscapes, tear down governments, cause the populace to rise up, create a ruckus, transform morals, foster a new way of thinking, bring emotions to a tempest, entice new beliefs, systematize evolution, inform you, all the while functioning for the good of humanity....

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Categories: contains, future, society, strength,
Form: Free verse
The Zero World
The zero world How the tide rises and falls, How the sky lightens and fails, How the wind peacefully goes To the zero scale it contains - zero doesn't judge, it just exists. (c) Maryna Tchianova, Ukraine Copyright © Maryna Tchianova | Year Posted 2016...

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Categories: contains, adventure, allegory, freedom, future,
Form: Elegiac Lyric
Premium Member Acceptance Contains No Regret
Its taken me a long time to finally admit that you aren't coming back to me I knew from the start you were a quick fix I struggled with my loneliness forever so it seems but I have to admit, it got easier each day The empty mug sits in the sink ,no longer yours...

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Categories: contains, grief,
Form: Verse
This Is a Limerick That Contains No E's
This is a limerick that contains no e’s, Though that may be hard to believe. But I declare it be true, (Okay, maybe a few, Cuz “no e’s” is really hard to achieve!)...

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Categories: contains, humorous,
Form: Limerick
Elicit Illicit Lucid Dreams -Contains Nudity-
~JSLambert does not (currently:) use, or encourage hallucinogenic drug use. Telepathic psilocybin prescription erasing elastic depression. Competition wanes, just when nocturnal emission drains. Lifted poetic wing clipping. This party only makes sense to those encrypted with unconsciousness. Scalpel in hand, methodical break and entering, break dancing meninges remove portions of brain doin'...

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Categories: contains, allegory, allusion, appreciation, beauty,
Form: Carpe Diem
Free Cee This Poem Contains Anthrax So Do Not Read
INSTRUMENTAL INFATURATION The piano man stopped playing when you walked in And that’s when I heard the brass begin The flautist was taken aback by your grin And then I heard the voice of a violin The drummer stumbled over his beat As I bumbled over my feet Then a sax and the trumpet came to meet And suddenly the syncopation was complete I...

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Categories: contains, music, song, song, i
Form: Quatrain

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Book: Radiant Verses: A Journey Through Inspiring Poetry