Sniffer Poems

Hair Clogged The Magical Drain

...As Far as our Eyes will see,
In a Vast, and seemingly
endless World
to the Future’s greatest of Extents,
in a little Hut,
Hidden in a Swamp,
Lies little Old
Ms.
Garratha.
with the few who Re...

HALLS OF AMENTI 2

...HALLS OF AMENTI 2

Doom dark in the 
Halls of Amenti
whole families are 
dropped down drains 
covers shut tight
no pink flamingos  
not a single orange 
tree in sight

They grope along hol...

IN THE SHADOW OF SUNLIGHT

...Pete Kovacs was a cop based in Cyprus, a small mid-western town
Nothing much happened with regards to crime from sunup to sundown
But on the 4th of June a couple came in to report their daughte...

The Enthusiastic One

...Excitement radiatin' from her body
Sun glistening down at walking dolly, 
Azure eyes engaged in small and big blooms    
Sniffer gravitates to the perfumes, 
Vast bag hangs off the back with snac...

I Refuse to Teach Macbeth When It's Forty Degrees Outside

...King Duncan wouldn't allow it
Chin sweat and air conditioning 
Sending me into a linguistic shaming spiral

Flavoursome mints and sparkling water
Won't fix this wet nightmare
Telling the steps ...

War Dogs of Bagram Airfield Afghanistan

...Bagram airfield the Ugandans handled the bomb dogs.. heading back to my CHU after a mission i would see them for their morning walks.. one dog famously wore motorcycle goggles, story is he took a bla...

Interrupting Two Black Panthers

...I had never interrupted a black panther conversation before.
I stopped in my tracks, barely breathing.
Hoping neither of them had noticed me.
One of them had a sniffer high in the air.
I ducked b...

Tom Cunninghams Cunning Marmite Conspiracy - An Ice Cream Gran Special

...It’s dreadful, a disaster, it’s a terrible calamity
Housewives going frantic for the thing they seek but cannot see
Supermarket workers helping those who shout the most
Try their best to find a ja...

Take a Powder

...Go away, Today,
You have overstayed your stay.
You think you're tough,
We've had enough it's been rough,
It's time to go.
Go now,
We can't allow
This bedlam to last,
You've had your day,
Jus...

Rainbow Eagles Vs Death Stars

...Imagine for a second
      that the entire Afghanistan affair 
were a baseball game between two arch rivals.
The United States Rainbow Eagles and the Taliban death stars
The eagles start the game...

Truffle Hunt

...Black Gold, French haute cuisine, that is!
Truffles - Black, White and Brown! 
These humble amorphous lumps of fungi fruit dung,
are diamonds in the dirt, 
much coveted by chefs all over,
for th...

The Bum Sniffer Then Licked My Face

...She's home, She's home
I'm no longer alone
I'll show her I love her 
 she'll put down her phone
With a jump and a lick
Maybe do a small trick
She'll get out my lead, but remind me
"Well have t...

Subjective Smell

...The sweet perfume of the flower 
Is in the nose of the sniffer....

A Little Doggie Missile Immune To a Whistle

...She’s a little missile
Hears my whistle 
Pretends it’s a whisper
Too busy with her sniffer

Every doggie has a nose
Some worth more than gold
My little one, uses hers for fun
She ignores me i...

The Campaign

...CAMPAIGN
Ngalia! ngalia! ngalia! again
Today with an imploring tone
"Barabara nimeunda choo nimechimba"
Stomach above the brain underneath
This time on luxurious Benz
For real no sincere tearin...

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