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old thoughts of myself

.i have listened to this tune at least a 100 times 
as i sit and ponder the puzzle around me how to play the pieces 
is there even a chance in this chess game of romance 
i have been alone all my life never no sibling 
she taken from me before her chance at this game this 
journey of this world just descent on to the after life 
continue on my journey thru life school education 
or one torment of bullying and torment why did i live 
this pain destroying the inside destroying the brain 
13 years of this middle and high school a bit different 
this brings new weapons to the game the game invloing love
still a game it seems i cant win not then not in middle school no girl ever 
looked at me nor in high school i was hung up on one that would never love me 
no prom dates no dates at all am i really that much of a distburnce 

still threw all this i have tried threw failure after failure and being nice trying 
to help other giving advice trying to let others love backing away for the sake 
and sanity of others and there game there journey 
so tonight i sit and listen to these tunes once again crawling looking again 
hoping the reality of my turn becomes true i wanna slow dance in a burning 
room just to hold some one in my arms be the one she all ways dream of
I have said all the right things countless times but its like destiny 
wont let me win some times so i ask god are u going to leave me crawling in 
the dark or 
are u going to show me some light some me some mercy and throw some one 
in my life 
that will give me the love i deserve i pray once again trying to have hope trying 
show u some faith so work ur will show me something give me a sign help me 
before i lose my mind i am tired of being stuck in the torrment please put me in 
some new 
chapters a chaper with some love in life i need some one i truly do so please 
point me where i need to be



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