Cruddy Poems

X Rated - bawdy

...With my girlfriend in tip top condition
To film sex scenes for late television
She got sick in bed
So I went instead
And was heckled with spiteful derision

Well their laughter had made...

Fries And Burgers

...
Feeling kinda cruddy, yup, that's the word
Too many fries, too many burgs

When will I learn I can't handle that stuff
Stomach rebels, starts causing a fuss

Once could eat nails and ...

Growth Beyond Grimy

...Written By:  D. Collins 11/12/24


 A growth spurt beyond grimy, some never do.
No need for names.  They know who I'm talking to.
<>

another abcedarian for fun

...all automatic alligators arrive arrogantly
barely behave beautifully but brazenly
carousing with creepy cruddy crocodiles
desperately denying despicable wiles
effectively expediting expediency
f...

Crazy Town

...No one goes down to crazy town
they stay put or don't care,
but floods seep
tides rise
snakes swim.
Crazy town does not knock
before it comes in.

Murderous are the many
who though few
do m...

Farmer Mcgillicuddy

...Poor old Farmer McGillicuddy
He’s somewhat of a fuddy-duddy
   He plows with an ox
   All progress he blocks
No wonder his corn tastes so cruddy...

Hula Hoop and Chicken Coop

...Hula Hoop and Chicken Coop

had a hula hoop
we were thrown for a big loop
cruddy chicken coup...

A Matthew By Any Other Name

...Hey Diddle Diddle 
My Little in his Middle
My Machu; My Pichu
Mommy loves you so much I could eat you
My Handsomest Man
You smell like a crayon
My Mammer; My Jammer
Your Uncle Peanut says you'...

My Latest Current Events Poetry

...My Latest Current Events Poetry

Trump like Pinocchio lied and nose did protrude,
And many people it appeared he would delude;
Even we knew,
Scheme up brew;
With jaundiced eye witnesses and riv...

Victims of Insurgency

...Half choked by a rising paroxysm of rage, then nisus,
The brittle and mirthless smile on his face were pathetic,
A nonaged;
Amputated and broken with a heart big but beats quiet,
Suddenly, he sig...

Always Will Wonder What If and More

...Always Will Wonder What If

I always had wondered what if,
When we were to take a whiff,
Of who;
Maybe you;
Can cruddy smell nock us over cliff.

Jim Horn

Have Been Told By Bernie

What ...

Pay Held Back By Trump and More

...Pay Held Back By Trump

Government Employees pay held back,
And common sense nary childish crack;
Trump out of line;
His not mine, 
While in White House blowing his stack.

Jim Horn

In wor...

Priest Is Fuddy Duddy

...Priest is fuddy duddy wearing clothes that are cruddy,
And we had decided to invite him to our Bible study;
Told us God,
Is not a fraud;
Now each week he has been our Bible study buddy.

Jim Ho...

Elf

...There once was a man named Buddy 

Whose life was pretty darn cruddy 

He thought he was an elf 

Then found his new self 

And then his past was no longer muddy...

Bible Study Buddy

...Bible Study Buddy

When the Bible we  will start to study;
Always best when you have a buddy;
Help  then assist;
And we do insist;
Not being with one can be cruddy.

Jim Horn...

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