No one lies awake at night,
wondering where I am,
or why I haven't called.
No one fears losing me.
No restless heart waits,
To hear my voice.
No one notices the silence,
When I'm gone.
I was never the place
Someone was afraid to lose
Or wanted to be
Never home.
I could disappear quietly
And their world keep turning.
My chair empty
My name unspoken
Maybe eventually--
Someone wouldn't even remember
Someone was once there.
The cruelest part isn't being left behind.
It's realizing that...
No one would notice
I was never there to begin with.
So I sat smaller
Quieter
Easily forgotten
A shadow
The heart no one longs for
An absence
Even before I am gone.
There was a time when happiness
seemed to me the only way of life.
Summer seemed to last forever
as if freedom had been served to me
on a big beautiful silver platter.
Youth was timeless and grand
with rainbows forever adorning the skies.
Whatever went wrong?
Late night conversations
Leading me to long nights with
Torn up journal pages and
Back to back convos in my head
If I knew the respect I deserve
Was never there, why didn’t I leave?
Why did I have so much faith in you?
Am I too desperate trying to love again?
Sometimes I question if I was too fast
Or wasn’t moving fast enough for you?
We were on two different timings and
We could never agree on the zone we’re in
I remember the weekly arguments
The tired look on my face
With the lowest grades I’ve ever had
Everything felt delicate and I didn’t want to break it
When I think about you,
I get scared trying to love again
Sometimes I wish you’d get punished
But there’s no point to it.
At the end of the day
You still carry part of my heart
And I’m trying to peace it back together
So I can give it to the right person
No more waiting for the next one
I don’t expect my feelings to disappear
But I hope one day I can look back
And thank you for helping me know
What I want next for me.
Maybe I was stupid for loving you
But I won’t for the right one.
When The River Was Empty
“When there is nothing left to burn, you have to set yourself on fire.”
– “Your Ex-Lover is Dead” by Stars
When the river was empty
you moved on…
I stayed
gaining nothing but age.
Tell me the day
does not equal decades
sifting through silt
and cigarette butts.
The sand proved too quick
for you to stand.
Old currents have caught me
and brought me back to our beds
through unteachable trails
where none is less travelled.
your footprints
still lead me ‘round
to when the thirst turned
back upon itself
creating
a wasting whirlpool
of what was
to be.
Why can’t time just forgive time?
And move me along instead of drowning
me in all my wrongs.
Someday the cold cold mountains (as they do)
will melt making many many drops of forgiveness
forging a small spring anew with life
reviving a renewed river,
rushing my ashes
to renewal.
I Once Was….
I once was young
Fresh out of school
The future lay at my feet
And everything was cool.
My face was void of wrinkles
My body flexible and strong
There was nothing I couldn't do
And my dreams inspired my song.
I never thought of aging
Of growing old
Forced to give up activities
Because my limits were sold.
I looked at older people
And felt a sense of relief
I had years to enjoy my life
Was my misconceptive belief.
Day after day
Year after year
I took life for granted
And lived without fear.
One day I woke up
And I looked in the mirror
I saw time had dwindled down
And my age was suddenly clear.
I was no longer young
With years stretched before
me
My body stiff like the tin man
My bladder the size of a pea.
My memory has faltered
Simple things playing hide and seek
And I faced the fact
That time had sprung a leak.
I once was young
And ready to take on the world
But time somehow got away from me
Like a newspaper age curled.
There once was a man named Clegg
Who had a wooden leg
It was full of coins
Right up to his loins
So he never had to beg.
IN AND OF WHAT WAS, WILL BE AGAIN
(I.E., There’s Nothing New Under The Sun)
In more ways than one,
it has been often said,
“what’s going to happen,
happened once before;
and what happened before,
will surely happen again.”
How thought-provoking.
Is there anything ever new?
Pondering the question,
check out the following flow:
Was not the present POTUS,
once before; and did he not get
kicked out of that office?
And will he not be
kicked out again,
this time too?
Indeed, no matter
how it goes, he will go:-
Just check out the Daily Sun,
and its sojourns: yo-yoing yesterday,
today, and tomorrow; as if to summarize:
“Its happened before, and will again.”
And hey, just check this out:
“Finally, let me say, remember,
we always reap whatever we sow.”
(“There’s nothing new under the sun.”)
I Was Here A While
I was here as the last breeze unfurls
To see the waves last few curls
What shall become of me afterwhile
Waiting for the moon I think I'll
Make my peace watching the ocean meet the sky
Pondering all those things that no one knows why
While the sun's last rays stand in the way
The moon has no place to play
I was here a while on this tiny sphere
Vibrating to the ocean"s roar so clear
In the earth's blink of her eye
Even a billion years after I die
To this marble I'll be dead for sure
In God's gift to the universe I'll remain obscure
A life of searching for where I fit
Maybe all I can do is imagine it
Not to forever live
Only mere moments does he give
Each a blessing
To be possessing
Beyond my time the future lays
And what may happen in those days
For I have no way to know
What may come and what may go
When my last breeze blows
And my final wave goes
All those moments of joy and pain
Will be lost like tears in the rain
As cold as my heart is
For a moment I felt heat around it
Could it be he managed to morph me
To something I never dreamt to be
Something sweet, something weak
Something I fear to, on the mirror meet.
Was it the hug so warm to me
That it balanced my homeostasis.
Was it the kiss so passionate
That he began by caressing my cheek
Perhaps when he put on mine his lips
When he slowly, soothingly pleased
My rarely touched skin
I began to have emotions, feelings.
Sudden joy and pain and love and hate trips
Oh dang! What had I done?
Now I look back and beg
To go back in time and rectify
What did not go according to plan
To the me that never cared
To myself which was ne'er fair
To that evil and ugly monster'ess
To as cold as my heart ...was
By Neptune
Written: September 17, for a contest sponsored by: John Lawless
***********
I flipped the book with a steady hand,
chapters etched as runes into the sand.
The tale was tangled, the lead crowned,
beyond, silence fell, no closing to be found.
The final leaf had vanished, sly and fleet,
perhaps devoured by some voracious beet.
Or maybe scribes, with quizzacious delight,
slipped it away to prank the sleepless night.
I searched the margins, parsed each crabbed line,
for clues the author left in sly design.
A smudge, a doodle, statice pressed in place—
but no denouement, no triumphant grace.
So now I tell the tale with aplomb:
the villain married, bought a stately home.
The hero tripped, repined, then took a nap—
the dragon joined a choir, and learned to rap.
And if you ask what moral can be spun,
I’ll say: beware a most distant sun.
For endings hide, as frenemy or ghost—
the last page missing always laughs the most.
There once was a certain floozie
Who sang just like a chantoozie
Not in smoky night clubs
But in outback pubs
It happened when she got quite boozy.
He Was a Child Once, Too
He was a child once, too—
before the dusk outgrew the dawn,
before his little hands knew
how much a heart could carry on.
A face once lived beyond his sight,
then slipped away from memory’s light;
and childhood, like a fading tune,
grew quiet beneath a borrowed moon.
He became a roof in someone’s rain,
a little warmth against their pain;
he gave his flame so others could see,
while darkness kept a place for him silently.
He wore the years like a borrowed coat,
kept every storm inside his throat;
and though the world saw strength in him,
I know the child still lives within.
To me, that man is not merely strong—
he is the real hero of my life.
I love you, Abu.
— Zehreen
I was in the mood
for a real page-turner.
My bibliophile friend
handed me a book of white-knuckle suspense.
"Read this! It's quite a doozy!," she promised.
And she wasn't lying....
I blew off many a phone call,
filed away my to-do lists,
prioritized book above all hobbies,
yadda yadda.....
I was surprised how fast I got to
the final chapter.
Alas, I didn't get to close the book.
Not yet anyway...
A surprise I never anticipated, you see.
Ugh, never have I
groaned so loudly in my life!
Jane knew I'd come to her
confused, demanding an explanation....
"Hey, is this your idea of a practical joke?", I asked.
She guffawed her "Yes,"
handing me
the last page she tore out.
Silly gal, best believe I'll get her back.....
did you see it?
good luck to you
take a sound recording of the gurgling under the kitchen sink
if you play that backwards you will find
it is an interpretation of an inversion
play it back and forth
it's actually Beethoven's 5th.
like Smoke on the Water
in an encouraging interview, the guitar player
was both humble and forthcoming
my son in his music lessons
will listen to samples of classical music
selected by the teacher
i've encouraged him to ask as the piece ends
to raise his hand and say,
'now play that backwards.'
You call yourself my father but you never even bother to call me your daughter.
I sat for a while thinking about you
I thought that maybe hes on the moon
“Mollee what did you do, to make him leave all of you?”
I realize that it was never my fault
Hes and adult
Why should I blame myself for him walking away, it’s not like i was old enough to tell him to stay
Thinking about him leaving used to hurt more then bleeding.
I'm 14 now and somehow I still don't know why you left
you just settled on theft.
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