Mart Poems

The Labubu Craze

Labubu grins, a curious work of art,  
Kasing Lung’s dream, brought forth from the heart.  
Pop Mart displays, collecting carts start,  
Lisa’s embrace gives trends a new chart.

People of faith, consider your part,
Not every craze should capture your heart.
Fame’s shining lure can pull us apart,
Discernment and wisdom must always take part.

Enjoy what

Shoe Mart

Half besides Shoe Mart
Rise height of ephemeral,
The other side blank.

Mart Taught Me

Mart has almost no friends.
He is a different race than anyone at school.
His low I.Q. makes him act differently.
He is a concrete thinker.
Abstract thoughts he does not grasp.

When he gets a friend, he is super thrilled.
His exuberance overwhelms them.
He speaks in a super loud voice.
He is an incessant talker.
He needs no personal space, so he

Wally World Or Walmart

1.	As you search the aisles at Walmart for something to say to your boyfriend’s mother?

a.	You look for kind words in the book section
b.	You search through the sheets and comforters
c.	You listen to the other customer’s conversations
d.	You pray that she isn’t listening closely to your wisdoms

2.	When there is a sale at Walmart, you – 

a.	Grab your car

Face of a Dead Woman

On her face the portrayal:
Was undeserved betrayal:
While resting in mortuary;
Later in her obituary.
But her photo had come first:
A scream-it-to-The World thirst.
 
But I have my own challenge:
What would finding a thing change?
Lies that could break a strong heart:
She’d shoplifted in a mart?
Or whisper desultory
Alleging adultery
“Man had been a betrayer,
Her face ‘not First Soothsayer…”

Art Is No Milch Cow

What if Mona Lisa’s treated like corn? 
In multiple forms made and marketed? 
From one of a kind and mysterious born, 
What if it steals no heart nor turns keen head?
Imagine several shades of dull grey, 
And classics that meander out of hands, 
What if Sun never sets nor ends the day? 
Bouquet that passes

I Wanted To Buy Wal Mart Stock

I wanted to buy Walmart stock
My husband said it was a bad deal
It would never increase in value
I had a different idea, but he is the financial genius
So I backed down
And watched it rise up and up and up and up and up
I am still watching it rise up
But I keep my mouth shut about

Welcome To Kansas Sofa Mart

“Welcome to Kansas Sofa Mart. How are you today? Looking for anything in particular?”
They look like an odd couple. He is old and ugly; she is young and cute. Too cute.

Husband glares. Wife runs toward salesman, jumps on my lap, strokes my beard.
“You remind me of my daddy,” wife says. Husband looks damned mad.

I jump

Wal-Mart Convenience

Do you have a copy machine?
Well certainly, Wal-mart said.
And she proved it.
I don’t suppose you have a notary, I said hesitantly.
I AM a notary, Wal-mart said.
She grabbed up her rubber stamp, ready to stamp.
I don’t suppose you take blood tests here, I asked.
“DNA tests?” She asked, perking up, getting out a DNA kit.
“Marriage blood tests,”

Another Quake At Dino Mart

Once there was a ginormous purple dinosaur.
His nickname was “Tiny”, and he was very poor.
One day he went stomping into the yummy store
wanting Fruity Pebbles; he didn’t have any more.

One old box was left on the shelf and it was ripped.
Irritated was Tiny, he trampled and flipped. 
He ran full speed around the store, fell

Parking Lot Meditation

PARKING LOT MEDITATION 

Leaning back on my car hood
the old blue skies have my eyes   
squinting  ion clues of a melody 
wanting to be born of scars in me 
innerspheres humming to a song 
an accompaniment to this show 
of seagulls’ white wings soundless 
in a crowded messaging sky shared 
with jets

Kwik-E-Mart

Altiloquent in behavior
Quick to carom
Unabashedly pawky
A labyrinthine of misadventure

Like living in Greenland
Hardly felt warmth
Got the oil-
Wanted nothing more

Silenced your weapon
Named it trust
In the end
Just shot yourself

Like Halloween everyday
Since the mask came on
A new disguise
Darker and darker you stay

Jeff Mart Jingle

Years ago I wrote a jingle for a real store.
They didn't know I did, but I did.




The soda pop shop
The soda pop shop
Be sure to stop
In the soda pop shop
If it ain't pop
We ain't got it
Jeff Mart!

On Second Foundation Day of D-Mart

In the month of July during whirlpool
A Legacy was born to challenge a fool 
Who in sphere of market did money drool. 
As all feast and dance and sing in yule
Many people like Vipul, Maulik and Sanket rule 
Over minds of customers who remain very cool
In our D-Mart which served as a perfect tool,
Come and

Why I Hate Shopping At Snarl-Mart

Why I Hate Shopping at Snarl-Mart 
  
By Elton Camp

The parking lot’s hard to bear
For it must be a mile square

Any spot close to the door,
No parking there anymore.

Dozens of them are labeled
“For use only by the disabled.”

Enough for every wheelchair
Within a hundred miles of there.

At the door, I nearly start to choke
Employees around

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