Manners Poems

Manners Maketh Man

The premise goes everyone knows
before entering the premises
while still outside yet on the mat
it's no gentleman who forgets
to doff his cap or remove his hat
if dining out or at a private party
for a particular person
it's impolite at most
to sip slurp or slink a drink
before the toast to a hospitable host
and when beside the table laden
confronted

They Taught Me Manners, Not Consent

They taught me
to keep my voice folded
like a handkerchief in my pocket,
clean, unused,
never to be raised,
never to be loud.

They taught me
to sit like a question
that dared not be asked,
to smile like a mirror
that reflects everyone
but never itself.

They taught me
how to serve tea
with trembling hands,
how to laugh without volume,
how to cover my chest
with shame stitched
by mothers

Where did manners go

Hello how are you
How've you been
Things we need to hear again
Thank you. Please. Appreciation
Have disappeared from this nation
Manners and more pleasantries 
Need returning. They have fleed
From the hearts of me and you
We need to really undo
All the damage we have caused
With our mean and hateful flaws

Table Manners

At his wife he shouted: I’ve had my fill;
your cooking gets first prize for swill.
Why, it isn’t even fit for a hungry pig.
Is that why, she shouted, you down big
and bigger portions, and why your nose
dives blindly into it and disappears?
Wake up, porky. What do you suppose
I’ve been feeding all these years?

Supper Table

It is here that children are given instructions on what it means to be human. We make men at it, we make women.
Joy Harjo her poem Perhaps the World Ends Here

Supper Table

There was a time when the supper
table was a gathering place.
A time when children and parents
sat down together.
A time when television, computers,
cell phones didn’t

Theory of Use and Misuse

Lamarck’s ‘Theory of Use and Disuse’,
By giraffes seems subjected to misuse.
They learnt the table manners,
Eating through gaps of manors.
This photo of theirs gets million reviews!

Dinner Manners

Quietly waiting
at the table
legs swinging…
Then, Aunty Jean 
brings in
green soup.

Mother-glares at me,
sister-stares with me
at the cold green soup.
Is it medicine,
pond slime, 
mushed frogs?
...at least twenty 
spoonfuls long.
Silently I say, “Ugh!”

Quietly waiting 
at the table…
Aunty Jean brings in
passionfruit cheese-cake,
cream dessert.

Is it more slime,
frog spawn,
tadpole eyes...?

Oh no, it’s a giant slice.
I take one bite…

“Oh,” says Uncle Ron,
“Don’t

The Gift

I gave a gift, he took it, and then he set it aside.
Maybe it is too narrow, or maybe it is too wide.
The flu is going around, so maybe his voice is hoarse.
Maybe it needs a bow. Then he'd know it's a gift, of course.

Perhaps he doesn't like it. Then I'd give it to another.
I

Keep Off the Couch Says Miss Manners

I worry about a deep scratch,
That is on the glass, not the hatch.
On couch, keep a clutch -
Your blow’s a bit much,
When farts, with a stain, do dispatch.

I Refuse To Believe It

I've refused to quite believe it
The first thing I'll cast into pit:
A man keeping a grace feline,
Whereas he quaffs a lot of wine;
Better than all of us name signs,
Fine Table Manners as he dines;
In the streets makes no careless call,
Steady strides while The Sober fall.

Keep I shall taxing my poor wit:
An endless search for answers

Social Media

SOCIAL MEDIA
I don’t know much about social media
I need help from an encyclopaedia
Social media has its place
I would rather talk face to face
Although, I do like texting and emailing too
They are the easiest things to do
But, you can’t get a hug via text or email
You could try but you would fail
You could even write a

Manners

manners maketh man
as time slips by
men in short supply

Sly Swimmer

there once was a sly swimmer bloke
whose manners were sure to provoke
	his form was unique
	a brand new technique
he mastered the women’s breaststroke

C a T and the Sphinx

***  C A T and the SPHINX***

Cat is on the prowl
Without taking a step!
Proud fellow, often unseen,
Gracefully gliding by.

He feels he knows it all —
At least all that is necessary to know —
Of the far, the wide, on  
Past the doors and through the walls.

Cat tallies his receipts
   From his surroundings,

Merlin the Magic Cat

Merlin the cranky cat
sat around getting fat.
Wanting to be heard
he mewed and purred. 

He yowled and howled
and even growled
all with the same result.
He felt it quite the insult.

He snarled and hissed
What had he missed?
He tried a mewl
and lost his cool.

Short of a caterwaul
what should he call?
A tiny squeak perhaps?
Were they taking naps?

Chirrups and chirps
brought no

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