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Colonoscopy Poems - Poems about Colonoscopy


Premium Member Colonoscopy
The concept is crazy. It's entirely insane. Thanks for suggesting, but I will abstain. No way, I'll never do that. I'll drink rusty water from a wagon left in the rain, mixed with boiled fat and a tank of propane, but I'll never do that...again....

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Categories: colonoscopy, humor,
Form: Rhyme
Premium Member Colonoscopy
I have a special interest in telling about my colonoscopy. The doc cheerful, secure in his specialty, colon cancer being the second leading cause of cancer death after lung tumors. They can snip the precancerous polyps right out of you during the test. At first the doc gave me the statistics but having paid 25 bucks for this ...

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Categories: colonoscopy, cancer, death, future, nature,
Form: Free verse



Ace colonoscopy doctor Kellen Karl Kovalovich
Ace colonoscopy doctor Kellen Karl Kovalovich revisited January 23rd, 2024 on the evening before yours truly (the one and only Matthew Scott Harris), a stand up comic wannabe, who historically heartily hales from Schwenksville, Pennsylvania undergoes oh joy rapture colonoscopy. Three days before that first appointment with estimable gastroenterologist Doctor Kellen Karl Kovalovich regarding upcoming procedure scheduled for August 17th, 2022), unfortunately yielded inconclusive results meaning the...

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Categories: colonoscopy, angel, anxiety, appreciation, birthday,
Form: Free verse
Colonoscopy
Colonoscopy Colonoscopy, strikes dread. It’s not too bad - when Colon trouble free. Jules Verne-like travel, up your ****, spelunking through strange, pink-ridged caverns. Hunting for the snark, or boojum, or polyp, who feasts, darkly, in there. Snipety-snap - jaws, polyp-snatch; dragging from view, miscreant tissue. Pathology dock - destined. Tried in the morning, suspected malign. Tried.. judged innocent. Callooh! callay! It vanished softly — my boojum....

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Categories: colonoscopy, endurance, farewell, humanity, humorous,
Form: Free verse
Ace Colonoscopy Doctors Kellen Karl Kovalovich and Larry Borowsky
Ace colonoscopy doctors Kellen Karl Kovalovich and Larry Borowsky Though necessary to down: four Dulcolax laxative tablets, quaff half 238 gram bottle of Miralax over span of eight hours, and if necessary even one Fleets Enema, I grudgingly accept short lived lower abdominal discomfort analogous to reasonable and tolerable assault upon me derriere considerably less severe than...

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Categories: colonoscopy, adventure, age, anxiety, appreciation,
Form: Free verse



My Colonoscopy
I passed a colonoscopy that gas was asked to free When all about my head went dead and smell was left to be That all my senses cried for help embarrassed for the cause That every doctor bared the sound of what was near applause So off I went to seek my fame and show I wasn't sick And let them probe my butt for...

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Categories: colonoscopy, appreciation, caregiving, grief, health,
Form: Quatrain
Online Colonoscopy
It's time to Test the new The latest in Technology No more need To drink over a Gallon of foul Liquid or any Sorts of pills To sort through In fact it's Almost Like a drive thru Butt in your own Home butt it's A bit more Complicated with Software butt What's worse Is the hard Drive...

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Categories: colonoscopy, america, baptism, birth, christian,
Form: Cowboy Poetry
Premium Member A Colonoscopy Sounds Like Fun
Tiger me growls, kicking the dog on the floor. She yelps, giving me the “I love you no matter what” eyes. That makes Tiger me mad, so she wakes up Trixie. They start wrestling around, growling and biting. Trixie is scratching her eyes out. I get to work and get sent home. It was not a dream. I have pink...

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Categories: colonoscopy, age,
Form: Free verse
My Colonoscopy
Not sure if this would be consider taboo To even mention the view Did I just hear her say the word touche When the doctor proceeded to do what she had to do With stage crew and camara in hand Filming what little dignity I have left Are the tapes rolling, I may need consoling When this crazy trip finds...

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Categories: colonoscopy, funny, humor,
Form: Free verse
Colonoscopy
I went to the hospital and they said they were going to shove a camera up my ass. I told them that I didn't want that to happen, I told them that I was going to pass. But they said it was too late because I'd already signed the papers that allowed them to treat me. But I...

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Categories: colonoscopy, funny, humor, humorous,
Form: Rhyme
Premium Member An Unusual Colonoscopy
I stepped in for my first colonoscopy. I was nervous everyone could see I had a choice to be awake or put out if I was skittish...but no not me I chose the former so I could watch my own ass on TV They go right up your canal with a camera like an RV Imagine my surprise when...

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Categories: colonoscopy, humor, humorous,
Form: Couplet
Premium Member I Bet You'D Rather Have a Colonoscopy
These are my people they're not yours or are they? You don't want them to be can see that clearly... So how come you come around? How come your attraction is mixed with such reticence? Yeah, I get it that you never thought about it. And you don't have to forever but here we are doing this and I gotta feelin' You wanna know what it means....

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Categories: colonoscopy, health,
Form: Light Verse
Colonoscopy
After 50 - states a well known belief Your colon can cause you some grief. To get it checked is the answer In case there’s a cancer With a procedure which can give you relief. A colonoscopy needs to be done Granted it isn’t...

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Categories: colonoscopy, healthhope,
Form: Limerick

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