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Long Angst Poems | Long Angst Poetry

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Long Poems
Long poem by J. W. M. Earnings | Details |

Your Sanity

Stuck in place…
Free in space…
you’re insane 
I’m as sweet as sugar cane…
Whatever happened to your unique personality?
Whatever happened to your sanity? 
Has it transformed to insanity?
I like the way you make me feel
Oh, you don’t have to make it a big deal
I love the way you lie about me 
Right behind my back
I never needed you in the first place
I don’t want you back! I don’t want to see your hideous face!
You pushed me in the margins…and you threw me away
You took advantage of me as if it was another boring and laborious day!
I don’t want you back, 
So go ahead and run away with your pack!
I’m the last magazine, 
Left alone on the magazine rack
I don’t want you to see my cry a river…
Whatever happened to your sanity?
Do you see my ocean of emotion? 
Why are you sponging in melancholy?
Pray to God for forgiveness 
He’ll consider you His faithful child of serenity
I don’t want to bleed without you…
But you’re rather bittersweet 
You boast way too much – that’s just neat…
I hate the way you treat me – like B.S. literally  
You think you’re better than everyone else – 
I think otherwise, you stinging bee!
You are literally bad to the bone
Whatever happened to your sanity?
Do you understand what I’m saying? 
Do you consider my plea?
Pray to God for forgiveness 
He’ll consider you His faithful child of serenity
I’m a loner, talking to myself again, 
Walking all alone…in the streets of shame
My happiness is hardly ever shown – this feeling of rejection has no name
Feelin’ this shame without a name…
I know these feelings might seem lame,
But they’re real to me – 
I’m jaded corrupted
Am I the cause of your misfortune?
Am I a singer, singing out of tune?
I miss you, but at the same time, 
I’m happy that you’re gone
I’ve never grown out of my fears of losing you – that’s sublime!
But, it seems like I can’t move on
Move on…man…just move on with this life
Though I might be the victim of strife
Your envy and heartless comments stabs me like a knife
And you ask if I’m alright…
Good riddance, you weren’t my ecstatic delight! 
You disowned me 
You joined the pack…
You rejected me…
You never got my back
Instead, you stabbed me in the back…
Whatever happened to your sanity?
Do you even remember who I was? 
Your friend who would make your 
Heart jump with glee?
Pray to God for forgiveness 
He’ll consider you His… 
His compassionate child of jubilance
Am I of any significance? 
You are a wolf in sheep’s clothing
You will feel my loathing…
I’m gaining fruitful insight 
That you lack tremendously
Your thoughtless words 
Made me taste your envy and vanity

Whatever happened to your sanity?
 
Whatever happened to your sanity? 

What are you afraid of? 
Returning to your misery?
Pray to God for forgiveness 
He’ll accept you in His family 
We’ll all sing with merriness 
In our hearts, we’ll never let our passion 
Get in the way or our lament will stay
God is our Father and 
We need to honor Him 
And obey every single day
I’m surrounded by my enemies now….
Save me…deliver me from them, 
For they use their bullying ways
God will answer our prayer in His own time – 
It might take hours, it might take days…
Until He takes full action
But He wants us to have a cheerful heart, 
Beating vigorously with gratification 
My emotions are ganging up on me…yah see? 
Will you ever leave me be?
I’m fighting this battle for my own sake…
I will watch you suffer and slowly, but surely break
Don’t take it easy, you’re getting it the hard way
Whatever happened to your sanity?
Whatever happened to your singing, uplifting me?
Pray to God for forgiveness 
He’ll consider you His faithful child of tranquility
Tough luck, you jerk! You’re so berserk! 
You’re like a madman…
Bombing the city and doing abominable work!
 
Maybe you’ll find your courage another day
Do me a favor and unchain me free from my poverty
Maybe we’ll be in good terms 
And in the same demented boat
Whatever happened to your sanity?
Why are using uncalled for profanity?
I can relate to your eccentric insanity…
I need you to do me a quick favor and 
Pray to God for forgiveness 
He’ll consider you His faithful child of serenity
Pray to God for forgiveness 
He’ll craft His miracles of mesmerizing euphoria 
Free me from this abhorrent agony 
Keep on pressing on with your uplifting ecstasy…
You would win my heart 
If you’d be so kind to make me a root beer float
You are the opposite of gravity, 
Lifting me higher than the mountains 
That used to stare me down 
The morning will be brought back to life 
Sooner than you think
I’m not in the brink of total disaster – 
I trust you won’t break my heart 
Like you did in the past…
The past’s wicked adversaries reduced me to sorrow
IS there hope in store for Tomorrow? 
Please tell me if it’s so…or this envied grief and curiosity will grow…
You wouldn’t catch me before I sink 
I’d like to thank you – that was sarcasm
I’ll give you a wink that signifies my appreciation of having you, you little brat 
But, you and I have gone through hardships in our personal lives…
I should’ve not of trusted you, but you were as mysterious as a bat! 
You were as sneaky as a black cat! 
You are so deceptive…so corruptive…so inattentive…but I still love you 
Hey! Don’t even try to step on me over and over again like a mat!
I won’t let you stomp all over me like that! 
My faith towards You will never shrink
As long as You’re here with me…
That’s what matters most, you see?
I would like to visit you 
We’ll meet eye to eye one day with a smile on our faces – 
Not a trace of dismay is seen and we’ll share our embraces
I really don’t know what to do or say
I’m speechless, but I’m fatigued, 
So let me lay my head on Your shoulders for a while
I want Your relief to shed Your perpetual peace on me, 
Wiping away the despicable bile
Rinsing away the mixed emotions, piling on me for a while…
It seemed like a long time 
At least it’s all over – at least I don’t take pleasure in committing a crime


Long poem by J. W. M. Earnings | Details |

Used As An Experiment

Used As an Experiment

THE SILENCE IS BREAKING MEEEE….CAN’T YOU SEE?


V.1: Strong AS STEEL, wrapped up with silver, heartfelt ribbons
Give it to me – the rope of hope
You smoked me out like a cigarette…
Used like I’m an experiment…I mope…I mope…
I’ve been ruined a thousand times
Yet, I stayed strong – I never cried a tear

(pre-chorus)
You’re getting by – I’ll let you through and go ahead and commit your 
crimes!
I have no fear in my young heart…I don’t bottle up fear
And I ain’t gonna shed a tear for you 
I’ll keep searching for the light with or without you
(pre-chorus)
You’re getting by – I’ll let you through and go ahead and commit your 
crimes!
I have no fear in my young heart…I don’t bottle up fear
And I ain’t gonna shed a tear for you 
I’ll keep searching for the light with or without you

(chorus)
What am I supposed to do? 
Your hate internalized in me…
Don’t ask me to change – I sift out every single lie
Because I won’t stop believing in the Lord Most High
I burned in the dense flames, 
I churned…in the ocean of blames…
Remorse, calling me names

V.2: I bleed…you were my disease once upon a time
Visiting rehab in my head…
Addicted to you like a drug…
Abused and moved by you….
I don’t care about me anymore…
Disaster unfolds, trapped in your scorching RIBCAGE…
Restoring rage….you called me hideous names behind your breath
I’m like an absurd bird, longing to fly out of her cage
Now, I get you…I get your motives of abandoning me…. 
You neglected me…you stubborn, attention-seeker
You never listened to my acknowledging complements 

(pre-chorus)
You’re getting by – I’ll let you through and go ahead and commit your 
crimes!
I have no fear in my young heart…I don’t bottle up fear
And I ain’t gonna shed a tear for you 
I’ll keep searching for the light with or without you

(chorus)
What am I supposed to do? 
Your hate internalized in me…
Don’t ask me to change – I sift out every single lie
Because I won’t stop believing in the Lord Most High
I burned in the dense flames, 
I churned…in the ocean of blames…
Remorse, calling me names

V.3: You ditched me with heartless selfishness in your heart – you’re a 
devil! 
Your lips soaked up the poison in your heart…it cements
Deep inside of you…deep down inside…
Wait for me, so I can keep up with you…
I don’t care about me anymore…
Disaster unfolds, trapped in your RIBCAGE…
Restoring rage….burning wild like wild sage…
I’m like an absurd bird, longing to fly out of his cage
Don’t discard me – give your heart a break
Don’t hurt me – for Mount Heaven’s sake!

(pre-chorus)
 You’re getting by – I’ll let you through and go ahead and commit your 
crimes!
I have no fear in my young heart…I don’t bottle up fear
And I ain’t gonna shed a tear for you 
I’ll keep searching for the light with or without you

(chorus)
What am I supposed to do? 
Your hate internalized in me…
Don’t ask me to change – I sift out every single lie
Because I won’t stop believing in the Lord Most High
I burned in the dense flames, 
I churned…in the ocean of blames…
Remorse, calling me names

V.4: Loving you ain’t easy, that’s for shore…we never were a fine pair (you 
only lived for your own satisfactions)
Blameworthy – I seem to be these days
Get up from the ground and think better about your actions (For all I’ve 
stood for, you were never appreciative…I swam lonely in the pool of misery 
and despair)
Next time, leave the front door…
I’ve been wandering in the maze of bewilderment
Find your own way out of my labyrinth of lament
Dare to wonder where I’ve been?
In the cave of sin…caved in by sin…
Getting devoured in the lion’s den…

(pre-chorus)
 You’re getting by – I’ll let you through and go ahead and commit your 
crimes!
I have no fear in my young heart…I don’t bottle up fear
And I ain’t gonna shed a tear for you 
I’ll keep searching for the light with or without you

(chorus)
What am I supposed to do? 
Your hate internalized in me…
Don’t ask me to change – I sift out every single lie
Because I won’t stop believing in the Lord Most High
I burned in the dense flames, 
I churned…in the ocean of blames…
Remorse, calling me names

V.5: I don’t care anymore…
Disaster unfolds, trapped in your RIBCAGE…
Restoring rage…burning bright like a star with a tattooed scar
It feels so wrong to be in the dark, so far…so far…
Away from your charms…your warm, cuddly arms…
So far, I’ve been digging deep in your soul…
Anxiety banging at my skull…skull…
In my mind and heart again
Forget and forgive 
Feed the flames of uncertainty
You don’t deserve to die or live
Where shall I flee? Free me…

(pre-chorus)
 You’re getting by – I’ll let you through and go ahead and commit your 
crimes!
I have no fear in my young heart…I don’t bottle up fear
And I ain’t gonna shed a tear for you 
I’ll keep searching for the light with or without you
(pre-chorus)
 You’re getting by – I’ll let you through and go ahead and commit your 
crimes!
I have no fear in my young heart…I don’t bottle up fear
And I ain’t gonna shed a tear for you 
I’ll keep searching for the light with or without you

(chorus)
What am I supposed to do? 
Your hate internalized in me…
Don’t ask me to change – I sift out every single lie
Because I won’t stop believing in the Lord Most High
I burned in the dense flames, 
I churned…in the ocean of blames…
Remorse, calling me names

V.6: Yet, I stayed strong – I never cried a tear
I’ve been ruined a thousand times
Used like I’m an experiment…I mope…I mope…
You smoked me out like a cigarette…
Give it to me – the rope of hope
On my own, feeling like I don’t belong – wrapped up with blue, heartless 
ribbons


THE DISTRESS ABYSS IS SUCKING ME UP – RELEASE MEEEEE….


Long poem by Ruben O. | Details |

Drink Responsible - Slogans -

.
                         Can you hear me now? Good!                                 
                       I can't seem to forget you                                         
                    I love what you do for me                                          
                 It must be love                                                             
              between love and madness lies obsession                       
           Like always. Like never before                                        

At the sign of the                                         cat 
have a break, have a                              Kit-Kat                    
Tastes so good cats ask for it by name 
                                                      Schhhh ... You-know-who       

I'd rather die of thirst than drink from the cup of mediocrity
                                                                  Perfect to you
                                                                       Purely you 
There's a smile in every Bar                                                                                   
               Obey your thirst                                                                        
               This Bud's for you                                                
One a day helps you work, rest, and play                     
               More fun than rum                                             
               Drink responsible                                   
Heineken open your                                            world                                                
Because  that's
                                              i                      n
                                 k                                              d
                          e                                                             o
                        h                                                                 f
                        t                                                                m
                                                                                      o
                                                                                m
                                                                         y
                                                                  o
                                                             u
                                                          a
                                                          r
                                                          e
                                  
 ... nobody can say no to the honey nut O              
a bowl a day keeps the bullies away         

                           
                   Our plans are based on yours                      
                   You have my word on it                    
Be the first to know                       
Who we are                                 
                The "no problem" people  
                                                   Only smarties have the answer           
                                                   Making it all make sense 
                       
Drink responsible                    
                       Because that's the kind of mom you are                
Sometimes you've got to break the rules       
                       Blow your own bubble                           
You're invited                                       
                       Catch our smile?
Everything we do is driven by you                                     
Driven by what's inside                                            
                       We'll take more care of you                                 
                       You asked for it.                You got it                            
We know what it means to serve                 
On your side                                              
Allied on your side     
      
You're in good hands  
We make it happen     
We'll be there                           
Get the feeling                       
Im lovin' it                                   
You are the controller                       
Only on Playstation                    
                                 You are now free to move                
                            Unleash the beast       
                       Is it in you?       
                  Do you dare?   



About this poem:
To "write" this poem, I used slogans, short and often memorable phrases
used in advertising campaigns. Below you can find the name of the product 
(or the company) in order of appearance.

-Verizon Wireless; Wind Song; Toyota; Honda; Calvin Klein; Saturn
-Mercury; Kit Kat; Meow Mix; Schweppes
-Stella Artois; Wella; Dell; Hershey's; Sprite; Budweiser; Mars; Malibu;
 Captain Morgan; Heineken; Rice Krispies; Cheerios; Applejacks Cereal
-Assurant; Isuzu; CNN; Guardian Life Ins; Auto-owners Ins;
 Smarties; Microsoft
-Captain Morgan; Rice Krispies; Buger King; Bubble Yum; Red Hills Inn; 
 Pacific Southwest Airlines;  Ford; Subaru; British Airways; Toyota; USSA;
 Nationwide Mutual Ins; Allied Ins
-Allstate; IBM; Chevrolet; Toyota; Mc Donalds; Microsoft Kinect; PS3;
 Southwest Airlines; Monster Energy; Gatorade; Curious.



Long poem by Poetryof Providence | Details |

The Forge

I remember the beach sand and swing
when you and mother were still something
I remember the ducks in the lake
you held my hand watching their wake
I remember the sheep dogs when the day was through
and the mornings grass all covered with dew
I remember the dead man and blood on the floor
my hand in my mothers as she went for the door
I remember the stairs I thought I’d fall through
and the building where she was hidden from you
she tried drowning me in the bath and the tub
her hands on my throat on the dining room rug
the pain of the walls where my body flew
the floor of the closet when she was through
I remember you entering the door
as you picked up my body from off the floor
the words were so ugly I’ve forgotten them now
but things haven’t changed much anyhow
I remember the willows and switches not few
a home not mine and the children were new
a string of families never seeming to end
the abuse and the beatings I’m not on the mend
I remember the the rage and the red flushed face
what did I do to fall from your grace
I remember the fear when I tried to hide
the man and the 2by4 when it hit my side
the bruise and welts with noone to care
my mother and father aren’t even there
I remember the family that took me in
they had no daughter just two young men
one boy was loving the other was slime
but the parents protected me most of the time
I was safe for awhile with nightmares not few
and some of my demons she helped to slew
I remember you taking me home at last
you had remarried some six months past
I remember the woman was cruel and mean
she remained that way till I was sixteen
At fifteen I had been already raped twice
the drugs and pills and the wrist yet to slice
I remember the police to the hospital sped
the straight jacket and thorazine I should have been dead
I remember the airplane that sent me away
with my half brothers mother I was to stay
my neck with a forearm pinned to the wall
my half brothers brother screaming he will have all
I remember the screaming as I flew down the stairs
his violence had caught me totally unawares
the pain as he smashed me on the walls of the hall
the kicks in the ribs after my fall
the nine months I walked in a state of fear
how I passed my classes is very unclear
I remember the man when I hitched into town
the car was a sedan of dirty brown
the doors had no handles no way to get out
he pulled out a knife and proceeded to shout
how he would cut me and make me bleed
if I didn’t fill some sort of need
how I grabbed the wheel for steering the car
when he slammed on the brakes down the road not far
when he slid out the door by the side of the road
it seemed to me that all time had slowed
he released me with curses not language unknown
from the cage of his car this bird had flown
I remember the man preaching justice and truth
but to find answers one must become sleuth
I remember the marriage and I made him swear
that to hit or harm me he must never dare
I remember the baby with curls of gold
by seventeen to marriage my father me sold
I remember the lapses of time I had lost
the forge of my youth and the price it had cost
the thread that kept me alive was so thin
in my mind it was always me against him
I remember the children that helped keep me sane
with some sort of focus with the man I had lain
I remember the striving for some sort of truth
what kind of a mother my children had in their youth
I remember it all so plain and clear
that violence from men will always be near
I swore at sixteen no child to have
if you couldn’t play safely with joy and a laugh
forgive me my children for bringing you here
the reasons I do things are sometimes not clear
My parents are gone and I do not mourn
but only for the life I was never shown
I did try to spare you the same kind of fate
I hoped that my love would be never to late
I had no control of the time or the chance
that injustice would look upon you with his glance
I raise my eyes to the heavens and vent to his name
to save all the children who are yet put thru shame
In a blast furnace my life has been forged
the tool of the hammer has formed my discourse
in molten metal I have been shaped
the tool of another I have not escaped
what of the purpose he hopes to hew
a piece of equipment all shiny and new
I remember my maker and the state of his grace
the road laid before me and the words of his face
the view of my nature he seeks to tame
with so many others who walk in the flame
in wails united to pull heaven down
and with its brightness scour the ground
his promise to do so has not yet passed
when all of mankind will feel his blast
the call has gone forth the meaning is clear
to give an accounting is so very near
those who think themselves high shall be made low
the dust of the earth their destined to know
the one that I follow has carved out the path
his star has shown brightly beneath thorn and the lash
I reach my arm forth to take hold his hand
to walk among humans woman and man
he paints a clear future for those of us all
a paradise lost to man in his fall

COPYRIGHT © 2009 C Michael Miller
via Duboff Law Group LLC

COPYRIGHT © 2009 C Michael Miller via Duboff Law Group LLC


Long poem by J. W. M. Earnings | Details |

My Robotic Fantasy

Livin’ in filth…
Flippin’ out on everyone…
Pow! to my head. Pow! to my head.
Hand me a gun…gun…
Was livin’ my dream
Once in a great while
Was dyin’ in reality
Run just one more mile

*whisper* What am I s’posed to do?
Sit there and cry?
Why am I sick with dem luv flu?
Why do I lie…
TO MYSELF!?

I put my mind into my work
Sorry for acting like a total jerk
That’s so abserk
Stressed out
Dry as a drought
But, I fought the battles that were wondering in my head
The attitude of gratitude drench me not with dread

Livin’ in a robotic fantasy 
Livin’ in a robotic fantasy
Livin’ in a robotic fantasy
Livin’ in a…
Livin’ in a-a-a-a…
Livin’ in a robotic fantasy…
I speak in rhythm
I speak to them
A sweet talk of non-insanity
I’m sane 
On another lane
I’m sane 
On another lane
I’m sane
On another lane…

Was livin’ my dream
Once in a great while
Was dyin’ in reality
Run just one more mile

*whisper* What am I s’posed to do?
Sit there and cry?
Why am I sick with dem luv flu?
Why do I lie…
TO MYSELF!?

Nervous reaction…I talk with no action…
My dreams will be fulfilled with satisfaction…
Give me a fraction of your satisfaction…
GIVE ME A FRACTION OF YOUR……….satisfaction…..
Satisfaction…
Shun out the light of the moon
Happiness will hunt me down soon

Livin’ in a robotic fantasy 
Livin’ in a robotic fantasy
Livin’ in a robotic fantasy
Livin’ in a…
Livin’ in a-a-a-a…
Livin’ in a robotic fantasy…
I speak in rhythm
I speak to them
A sweet talk of non-insanity
I’m sane 
On another lane
I’m sane 
On another lane
I’m sane
On another lane…

Society splintered my hope…
I was addicted to you like people hooked on dope

Was livin’ my dream
Once in a great while
Was dyin’ in reality
Run just one more mile

*whisper* What am I s’posed to do?
Sit there and cry?
Why am I sick with dem luv flu?
Why do I lie…
TO MYSELF!?

Was livin’ my dream
Once in a great while
Was dyin’ in reality
Run just one more mile

*whisper* What am I s’posed to do?
Sit there and cry?
Why am I sick with dem luv flu?
Why do I lie…
TO MYSELF!?

Decorate me with the finest gold
I am young, yet I have a mind of an old, old
Man, why does this pain drive me into insanity?
Can I be free for once in a lifetime?
Fairies dance before my eyes…
Flowers bloom before my eyes…
The grass is greener on the other side…
Stay by my side…don’t subside from my side, my beautiful bride
I’m crucified by these scars on my body…
Everybody stares at me…………….me…………me……….
Put a stop to this sorrow in my heart…
It’s ripping me apart…and I’m drifting in the death cart
Breathe into me your sunlit glee
Breathe into me your bittersweet envy
Breathe into me good traits from the Lord
He struck a chord within me…an accord I can’t afford

Livin’ in a robotic fantasy 
Livin’ in a robotic fantasy
Livin’ in a robotic fantasy
Livin’ in a…
Livin’ in a-a-a-a…
Livin’ in a robotic fantasy…
I speak in rhythm
I speak to them
A sweet talk of non-insanity
I’m sane 
On another lane
I’m sane 
On another lane
I’m sane
On another lane…

Was livin’ my dream
Once in a great while
Was dyin’ in reality
Run just one more mile

*whisper* What am I s’posed to do?
Sit there and cry?
Why am I sick with dem luv flu?
Why do I lie…
TO MYSELF!?

Was livin’ my dream
Once in a great while
Was dyin’ in reality
Run just one more mile

*whisper* What am I s’posed to do?
Sit there and cry?
Why am I sick with dem luv flu?
Why do I lie…
TO MYSELF!?

Drive this pain away from the scars I have on my skin
Shedding awful thoughts of suicide from within

*whisper* I want my own family
To smile with them gladly
Prescribe me happiness from up above
I’m 17 years old and not acting my age…fly away, dear beloved dove
Nervouscited as hell’s fire, coursing inside of me again
Drowning in my tears again…let the journey of life begin
Getting rid of golden….desire….
You dumped me in the trash bin…let the fire
Burn your soul to the ground
Like ashes, you fall without a sound

Livin’ in a robotic fantasy
Livin’ a robotic fantasy
Relivin’ God’s way of life
Forgetting the past’s strife…
It slices me open like a knife

*whisper* What am I s’posed to do?
Sit there and cry?
Why am I sick with dem luv flu?
Why do I lie…
TO MYSELF!?
*whisper* What am I s’posed to do?
Sit there and cry?
Why am I sick with dem luv flu?
Why do I lie? Why do I cry? 
Why do I hide from my obsessions of plenty?
Don’t you see the roaring sea?
Please, God, hear my plea………
My grief-stricken, faithful plea……..
Heal me
Steal away the pain
I was the thief in the night
I was watching the scenes of temporary lust –
The pornography of life turns to dust
My heart yearns for You alone
Don’t gnaw at me like a dog with his bone 

Hold on, dear friend
The pain will have its end


Long poem by J. W. M. Earnings | Details |

Throw the Blame on Me

Giving in to the silence one last time,
Everyone needs encouragement once in a while
Some need it everyday
For God’s sake, hear me out during this time of suffering
You're different from everyone else
It's not your fault x2
It's okay to be unique as long as you get along with your friends and enemies
Don't you feel comfortable with your group of friends?
You don't have to run away from the truth... 
Unless your bound to hear those heartless, malicious lies

Why don’t you
Throw the blame on me? 
Why don’t you
Unchain me free? Can you do that for me?
Can you do that to earn 
A ticket to freedom?
Can you heal this burn
That makes me feel numb and dumb?
Why don’t you
Throw the blame on me?
If it makes you feel better,
You can go ahead and ignore my plea
Throw the blame on me x3
Throw the b-blame on m-me

I’m the only one, feeling down in the gutters
I sponge in everyone’s emotions and it crashes into me
It seeps through me like the cool atmosphere
Sending me shivers down my spine, giving me mere fear
I don't know what you're thinking or making up in your silly, little mind
Are you planning on doing revenge? 

Why don’t you
Throw the blame on me? 
Why don’t you
Unchain me free? Can you do that for me?
Can you do that to earn 
A ticket to freedom?
Can you heal this burn
That makes me feel numb and dumb?
Why don’t you
Throw the blame on me?
If it makes you feel better,
You can go ahead and ignore my plea
Throw the blame on me x3
Throw the b-blame on m-me
Throw the blame on others, but YOU are not innocent 
If only you'd repent... Now you're faith is put on sale
Blame it on me, you pathetic jerkasaurus! I sting like a sinister serpent 
You're the "hero that won everone's heart" - you're a flippin' fail!!

I see that you're cornered by anger
I saw you almost falling off the edge
I smell your fury like a wildfire !! !!
But, I know that I might bring you some light...when the day embraces the night
You're different...now that's no lie...you never leave my sight
You never leave my sight
You are cotton candy, melting in my mouth with utter delight 
Why do I have to wave goodbye to our love when it's just the beginning? 
Maybe our time is tight! Alright...
Everything's black and white now! 
Give me your full attention somehow!

Why don’t you
Throw the blame on me? 
Why don’t you
Unchain me free? Can you do that for me?
Can you do that to earn 
A ticket to freedom?
Can you heal this burn
That makes me feel numb and dumb?
Why don’t you
Throw the blame on me?
If it makes you feel better,
You can go ahead and ignore my plea
Throw the blame on me 
Do you have proof, you act like a stubborn fool that used the wrong tool 
Why are you so extremely... Cruel??
You aren't cool - you're fire from hell
Where does your heart dwell? You make my heart go pell-mell!! 
Don't even try to put all the b-blame on m-me
You nearly killed me with your malicious envy!! 

Why did everything result in my breaking point?
My fragile, yet sturdy bones are out of joint 
I wanna share with you my divine flight
Reach for the sunlit sky with the peace-abiding angels
Fly like a herd of elegant birds
Hear me out - I can't meet to your high standards 

Why don’t you
Throw the blame on me? 
Why don’t you
Unchain me free? Can you do that for me?
Can you do that to earn 
A ticket to freedom?
Can you heal this burn
That makes me feel numb and dumb?
Why don’t you
Throw the blame on me?
If it makes you feel better,
You can go ahead and ignore my plea
Throw the blame on me x3
Throw the b-blame on m-me

This hardhearted love never warmed me up in the first place
I never want to see your face in the streets again…

Why don’t you
Throw the blame on me? 
Why don’t you
Unchain me free? Can you do that for me?
Can you do that to earn 
A ticket to freedom?
Can you heal this burn
That makes me feel numb and dumb?
Why don’t you
Throw the blame on me?
If it makes you feel better,
You can go ahead and ignore my plea
Throw the blame on me x3
Throw the b-blame on m-me
If it makes you feel better,
You can walk away from my sight and leave me be
I'll never look back at your shadows... Reflections
Why do I feel like you abandon me like a long, lost puppy - I hate having to deal with rejections
I've been handed the wrong directions

I never want to see your face in the streets again…

You left me without a trace
You left me alone in an empty room all day and you didn't have any pity of my soul - sorry to be blunt, but it's the bothering truth you must learn to accept - you must pay the price
You never gave me a piece of your grace
If it makes you feel better,
You can go ahead and ignore my plea
Though my heart would give in to the gloom of today and you didn't even bother to actually take my little advice and I'm, once again, your living sacrifice
Break the silence and greet me with a promising smile


Long poem by wala na | Details |

Am I Turning into a Lizard Serial Killer

Hmmm, where do I start? With deep sighs, I am sighing right now.
I just finished burying 2 lizards, and my heart is heavy...

Let me back up a bit...bear with me if I might turn out to be confusing here,
but I just need to write this, release something, in some way
Although I must admit, this is not exactly what I had in mind to write for this day,
hopefully I can write something more decent later...

I have been wanting to write something for my brother since yesterday,
since February 26 is his 10th year death anniversary.
The words remained stuck in my heart, 'til I fell asleep.

Visited him again today, heard mass for him, 
ate a Chinese dinner with my parents and sister, went home.

I now needed dessert. Got a piece of Ferrero Rocher, but just one wouldn't do.
So I got a piece of Almond Roca this time and ate it while walking.

All this time, I have managed to keep my tears away
but maybe somehow, someway, if tears want to fall, they will find a way?

I walk to that area again as I ate that piece of chocolate-
when what do you know, what do you know??

Oh sighs.

I stepped on a lizard.  Again 

Yes. Almost exactly the Same area, tail falls off, and the lizard skitters away.

But. I did not slip this time. But, yes, I still screamed, scaring everybody again.

I. Could. Not. Simply. Believe. IT.

One month and 25 days after, I step on a lizard. Again.

Today, of all days. As if I needed more reason to be sadder.

This time around, I had the sense to try to find that lizard. 
I had to know if it lived, if it was okay.
I pushed away the nearby cabinet.
And there it was.
Rather, and there they were.

The lizard that I stepped on now
and the petrified remains of the lizard that I stepped on on new year's day...
the other one didn't live after all :(

I know it was that lizard, same area, no tail, who else could it be?
Survival mechanism, no match for my killer foot.

By this time, I am crying, sobbing. 
Seriously, the tears just start falling, and my heart so heavy.
And I know it's from the combination of so many things.
The day itself, what I had just done, just things running through me.

What broke my heart, was to see that lizard. 
I was wearing rubber shoes this time, last time I was wearing slippers.
And its guts had spilled from its sides. 
I couldn't help but keep on saying, "Oh, oh, oh lizard, I am so sorry"

I touched it feebly, and it was literally gaping its mouth.
I don't think I can ever forget that?
Such a small creature, gasping, with its insides out, 
its skin on its legs and body scraped.
In pain.
Dying.

And it was all my fault.

My sister was there with me, trying to help in her own way.

But yes, there's nothing you can really do...I didn't want to stress it even more,
and let death finish what I did. 


There's so much I can glean from this, and I want to ramble on, so badly
but I will try to stop myself from rambling too much.

I put the two lizards, along with a note, the dates when I stepped on them 
(ok, killed them), and placed them carefully in a chocolate truffle box.

I buried them and still feel so sorry.

In some ways, this is can be so funny, and just  freaky & crazy (what's new, this is me?)
What were the odds??? Same place, same thing happening.
And I can't help but roll my eyes at myself as well, just finding it so hard to fathom
how I stepped on not just one but Two lizards in just two months.

I bet that the lizards are all afraid of me now, 
saying how I am a lizard killer. A serial lizard killer.
MO: stepping on them while screaming, maybe my screams also killed them off?

I actually took photos of both lizards, I am not sure why though.
Oh dear God, help me, I am acting like one, even documenting them.

I tell you, as I watched that lizard die, I couldn't help but just also
think of St. Jude (for the impossible) and St. Francis of Assisi (for animals).

I know he was dying, but somehow, yes, prayers still comfort me.

I just feel so guilty, with this happening. 

I still can't help but cry for those lizards, death by me, for no reason at all,
no purpose served.

Animals, people....death.

I know it's all a part of life... 
but it still doesn't change the fact how death can change us
and of how I am responsible for two lizard deaths.
I know they were just small animals, but Still. They were living creatures.

Death can change us in small ways, some in big ways, negatively or positively.

It all boils down to death transforming us one way or another...

I won't expound on it anymore, this is too long,
but one of the ways I can think of comparing it to, is that of a chemical change,
maybe of the spirit, the soul? Not merely a physical change.


And we can never be the same. 






022720141207123552


Long poem by Keith Bickerstaffe | Details |

Obsession


...inspired by 'Portrait Of A Lady' by T.S. Eliot


On winter days the view outside is nebulous at best,
within, the furniture is as it always was, and I am waiting,
waiting for a glimpse of you to silence my equivocating.
Somber is my attitude, the light is dim, curtains at rest,
as dust mites dance, the clock ticks unobtrusively,
marking time, the chamber maids make ready for my guest,
and dust the tables, clean the silver, place the flowers perfectly.
You return from 'La Boheme,' affected by the tragedy, 
emboldened by Puccini's art, transfiguring his sadness
to an everlasting theme of hope eternal, with no misery.
A small group of confederates who seize the meaning clearly,
examine his conceptions with a true and honest face,
only those who can conceptualize his grace.
And we are bereft of conversation.
The curtain falls between our faces,
we are left with little else to say.
Gone are common talk, and airs and graces,
walls have grown, and bars along the way.
Your friends have grown in stature, tried and true,
reflecting what you feel within your soul,
and you must follow them and share their view,
as long as it will bring you to your goal.
Friendship is a bond that can't be broken,
even though you dally with your heart,
you cannot spring the lock, that sacred token,
that keeps your deepest feelings true to art.
Your friends are pure disciples of your creed,
they will legitimize your need
to pave your way to conquer and succeed.

Within the mellow of the violins,
the sweetness of the celli and the horns,
I hear a tattoo beating all alone,
the tympani begin to pound 
a loud crescendo of their own.
I listen, there is something out of tone.
With cigarettes and sherry, unconcerned,
we wander through the garden unaware, 
take in the sights and pass without a care,
as if our similarities don't matter,
we give ourselves to nonsense, idle chatter.

Roses now are brightly blooming,
to your friends now you are calling.
I know not of what you speak,
I cannot fathom your delight.
You say: 'Try to understand my mission,
learn to trust in things unseen,
I must find what nature seeks
and fathom its eternal meaning.
Youth will never gather roses,
never see beyond the garden.'
I will stay for now, trapped in the cold.

Though I'll remember nature's wonders,
sunsets and the breath of spring,
feel the wind blow through my hair
and know the thrill of sunrise cresting.

We see the universe as dancing,
two such different creatures trancing,
we two will never understand
the private notions of the other,
even if we take each other's hand.

Coming close to your destruction
you will see the other side,
who says who has satisfied
requirements for a better life?
Friendship, if we could but find it,
yields the seeds of greater profit,
greater than the seeds of strife.

I now remain just as I ever was.

I shall take my morning walk,
communing with the birds and talking
to myself while reading Kafka,
glancing at the latest headlines.
Dear Stravinsky's 'Rite' is slighted,
(he'll return when ears are righted.)
When I smell a rose I'm prompted 
to recall a certain lady, gifted with
a new perception, I must sadly 
take exception, for the moment anyway.

The chill of morning, people yawning,
I am tired, the blush of dawning has me
feeling ill at ease, my spirit sags,
I barely reach the second floor.
'When will you return? Is Paris so much more
than you have here?' is my unanswered question.
I drag my heels to breakfast, 
listless as a lazy dog, and nibble toast,
my countenance as pallid as a ghost.

A letter would be welcomed. 
I shall miss you; there, I've said it. 
I am your friend, are you not mine? 
Tenuous and strained, two casual 
acquaintances who share so little time,
we brush elbows, like strangers passing
on a platform, sharing sidelong glances,
afraid to say hello. I watch you as you go.

Others swore we would be close,
peas in a pod, familiar.
Instead there is no warmth, not yet.
Were you to try we might combine
and nibble toast together, and take
a walk, your hand in mine, and
stammer conversation 'til we knew
there was no reason e'er to rue.
I shall sit with pleasant thoughts of you.

Desperate, I ponder on your death,
scant breath expended twixt the two of us,
and loneliness an ache too harsh to mention,
pen in hand and no one to subscribe.
I'll scarce recall the softness of your skin,
or search your heart to find what lies within.
Should I be bold, or take a gentler path?
encourage you... would I incur your wrath?
If you were to die I'd never know your truth,
and I should lose the vigour of my youth.


Long poem by J. W. M. Earnings | Details |

Echo Your Empathy

You’re my star – I set fire to our firey rose Bouquet of stars – I hand to you – We’re opposites, like poetry and prose You came out of the blue, I’m left without a clue! It all came so soon – the package of surprises All along, you were echoing your leave Anybody out there to help me? Hello? I can’t hear your echo Your echo is what keeps me on my feet I’m a believer…I’m getting discreet Around and round and round, We’re going round in circles We’re doing freestyle singing Swinging side by side…back and forth, Our fate keeps on swinging… Who will fill in the gaps? I never saw the light in goodbye… I’m caving in my ruins…I’m caving in my ruins I admit it – I can’t live without you, Lingering around me like a fly, enchanted by the lightbulb What am I supposed to do with this work of art? I’ve stumbled upon you and fell in love with you But, I’m lost in paradise – dropping levels – there’s mistakes we can’t undo There’s no perfect peace with the world falling at the seams, kissing the debris, Screwing with my head…you won’t ever see a trace of tears on my face – I’m left to be All alone, all along…but without you, I’m stranded in the wilderness… Giving me night-scares instead of dreams of reality I can’t hear your echo of empathy…I can hear chaos unraveling; I can hear the commotion of the ocean Falling victim to bittersweet emotion I can’t hear your echo of empathy…I can barely make out any hope in store I miss living my dream! I keep tell you that! – and all you do is ignore I’m on edge and I get upset and cry my eyes out No one can love this monster, but I won’t accept such foolishness I strayed from my heart’s passion and I got all the symptoms Of a guy with a solitary, silver soul….you stole my dignity My pride, my surreal sensations, my innocence Don’t dismiss me as nonsense Echo your empathy… I’m brokenhearted, but I won’t reveal it to you – you never felt for me So, don’t even bother to ask me why I’m crying? ’Cause I’ll never give you the full truth Almost all my life, I’ve been searching for the woman I love…and to find my heart’s tune But, love didn’t seem like enough – good luck will shower upon me soon You and I will view the astounding full moon… Find your way out of the maze of bewilderment I’m treading this rocky road with or without you – I can’t stand tall You are playing games with me, nourishing my resentment I’m swimming home – underneath the surface, feeling oh so blue Feeling the rejection…the jaded corruption banging at my skull I heard you screaming out my name Are you echoing your praise to me? Are you covering up my shame? Are you echoing my empathy? Echo your empathy… my delightful dolphin in the sea I’m screaming at the top of my lungs When I close my eyes, everything seems so fine Is my love good enough for you? I can hear you echo your empathy My voice is fading and dying out, but you’re my baby… My darling angelic friend of mine Our friendship mixed with love is as succulent as wine Listen to my echoes of my appreciation towards you I could make out your echo of empathy Echo your empathy of ecstasy! Give me your all…whisper in my ears I’ve been lost for many-a-years Come out of your black hole and resuce from my demise Echo your empathy upon me if can be so kind and wise Pursue our zealous goals and we’ll echo our triumph I don’t wanna bleed without you I don’t wanna breathe without you I wanna see your face, glistening with grace Gleaming with grace and I feel like I can beat this race I feel so alive for the first time in a lifetime For the first time in forever, you make me feel happy and oh so sublime Our exaltation is beyond amazing… I can’t get yah out of my head You’re my lullaby – I set fire to the pitch-black sky and I ascend so wondrously The firey rose – I give it to you – it’s a gift that’s articulate and almost flawless You blossomed like a precious rose in the Garden of Glory We’re opposites, like black and white, but you and I will never kiss the abyss Echo your empathy…my munificent maid! You’ve grown so much, miss! I can’t put my mind to bed…it’s racing with thoughts of you always and forever It’s racing with thoughts, blooming so true Echo your words of wisdom and hide not in shadows anymore (your hope’s a blur) – Come out of your shell and stop being so insecure Echo your empathy and you’ll be part of my crew


Long poem by J. W. M. Earnings | Details |

The Insane Lane

You healed me…you saved me with a kind, kind heart of sympathy
With well-spoken words (and you deleted the history of my endless rage)
Of empathetic wisdom and positivity…erasing the negativity and rehearsing accord in my mind of past grief and poverty
My tension releases like a billion birds (out of his ribcage)

You dragged me down with bad news…
You had everything to lose…
I had so little to win for…
But, you made me have this bruise
In my heart…you hit me to the core…
With cheerfulness and affection 
In my young, hopeless, genuine heart,
You are my illuminated night – show me some direction!
I was that dim light bulb from the start

Catch me before I fall
To tell you the truth, I have tried to stand tall
And give it my all…just answer my call
My heart is pounding in appall

Pound to the rhythm of my heart x8

Oh, I am going insane
Anxiety and curiosity brewing in my brain

Going insane…
Driving in another dark lane
You were loved
In the bottom of my heart
You were in chains in my heart
I tried to smile bright tonight
I wish you were gone in my life
I tried so hard…to take wing in the light
I wish you the best in life…
I pray for peace to murder the strife

You’re my – 
You’re my sunrise
You are – 
You are the one I prize
I am – 
I am the sunset in your eyes
I am – 
I am the nightfall before your eyes…
I unveil my beauty and I memorize
Every word you utter…
Your words – as smooth as butter 

Catch me before I fall
To tell you the truth, I have tried to stand tall
And give it my all…just answer my call
My heart is pounding in appall

Pound to the rhythm of my heart x8

Oh, I am going insane
Anxiety and curiosity brewing in my brain

And now I’m…
Now I’m…
I can’t say it…
I’m chained to this pit…
Of shame…
Without a name…

Going insane…
Driving in another dark lane
You were loved
In the bottom of my heart
You were in chains in my heart
I tried to smile bright tonight
I wish you were gone in my life
I tried so hard…to take wing in the light
I wish you the best in life…
I pray for peace to murder the strife

I’ve lost the race, 
I haven’t passed the test
But I’ll keep trying (trying)
Though, I’m frankly dying x3 (flying)
I’ll make it up to you, radiant friend of mine
Wipe off the grime from my face…this anger and envy becomes serpentine
To my heart…to my young, once-innocent heart

Pound to the rhythm of my heart x4
I tried to keep pace with the rhythm of my heart
Pound to the rhythm of my heart x4
I’m rolling in the deathcart…into the abyss, I go…take heart, foes that drag me down to the ground heartlessly… vicious night hunts me down like I’m its next prey…I pray x3 my life won’t transform into strife…blooming blasphemy in my young, anguish-whelmed heart 

Catch me before I fall
To tell you the truth, I have tried to stand tall
And give it my all…just answer my call
My heart is pounding in appall

Pound to the rhythm of my heart x8

Oh, I am going insane
Anxiety and curiosity brewing in my brain

And now I’m…
Now I’m…
I can’t say it…
I’m chained to this pit…
Of shame…
Without a name…

Going insane…
Driving in another dark lane
You were loved
In the bottom of my heart
You were in chains in my heart
I tried to smile bright tonight
I wish you were gone in my life
I tried so hard…to take wing in the light
I wish you the best in life…though it slits you like a jagged knife
I tried to search for you with all of my remaining might
I pray for peace to murder the strife…to end this miserable, chaotic life
Death isn’t in this grand land of ours 

Close the corridors of your blue eyes
Tell the truth and sift out the lies
I was black and lonely,
But, now I’m white and carrying with me the attitude of gratitude
I’m wearing an upside down frown of sunlit glee
In my heart…you hit me to the core…
But, you made me have this bruise
I had so much to win for…
You had nothing to lose…
You uplifted me with your good news

Your priceless words gave me ecstatic happiness
Your helping hands brought me out of the abysssssss
I was gravity-bound in the chambers of my mind…I was once numb…and she spit me out like tasteless, gross gum
Can’t help, but wish for God’s kingdom to come x4
You dug deep into my soul of anguish and cheer - thank you kindly for your empathetic words of wisdom


Long Poems