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Sad Memory Poems | Sad Poems About Memory

These Sad Memory poems are examples of Sad poems about Memory. These are the best examples of Sad Memory poems written by international PoetrySoup poets

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Details | Rhyme | |

Dust From The Past

Looking back again, back into the past, 
it was written in sand, all those questions we asked
on those last days of summer, something was wrong
as the leaves started turning, and shadows grew long

There was dust on the tables, and the clutter remained
where never before, .... had it not been restrained
You were known for your grace, now your pride was at risk
Quickly swept, polished fine, brushed away with a whisk

This just wasn't you, having bricks without mortar
You were never unkempt ...now a life out of order?
You would never have allowed such things out of place
Something so small, would have been your disgrace

There was something to blame, something was strange
Even small tasks, we noticed, had changed
Another piece of a puzzle, fell into place
Your trace of bewilderment, when a name was erased

Your memory lost, and a world gone absurd ...
Then, once it was you....alone and disturbed 
Lost and afraid, but mostly confused
Forgetting the day, many things you would lose,
or someone you loved, so much undefined
shoved back to blind spaces, your words couldn't find

Dust motes collected where never before,
would settle, make home, in your mind evermore
Without any warning, without any sound
until you were gone, and the years fell around

Dreams that you had, were drawn in the sand
into the traces of dust of a far away land

_________________________________________________
Inspired by Isaiah Zerbst's Contest: "Pick a Title"
10/31/14


Details | Free verse | |

Soul mates solace

When my final shadows cling on desperately
Where I fight formidable battles
to merely hold the light
I send you loving vibrations
and soul sustenance
Deep from the cathedral
of one heart to another
where today no choirs sing
nor symphonies play
Yet it is here where we meet
in spiritual solace
here to surrender 
and exchange inestimable treasures
recollecting memories 
like unopened letters
Galaxies are stretched
over chronicles of shared history
Nebula birthing stars
will be exposed
in forth-coming conversations
bringing short-lived fulfillment to you
Hungry to feast
now will be the time
to approve your blood art vision
and with my own haunting surrender
as dappled shades ink stain your chest
I will reside with you and share, mesmerised 
pens - by branding
as this will be your written reams to me
your artist's pallet or brushed canvas
no need for words
and yet creating
mysterious magical moments
Bitter-sweet the music
that dances taut guitar strings
but now blood approved
please go kick your heel up
return to your laughter
and ride on the breeze
for not all are lost
change not
for I am with you always
to love, listen and comfort as one
with you in me and I in you
as masterpiece


Details | Epic | |

Love secre, No more

I love you today,
An yesterday.
I loved you the days,
Before those ones... .. .
Yet kept a secret
  No one knows
Silents DON'T last 
        forever.. .
 A child's laughter
Ain't easy to hide you
        Know
ONE DAY IT'S,
GONNA SHOW....
    ......


Details | Marsiya | |

I'm my Daddy Made Over

Dedicated to my Dad Jerry W. Niday 3/20/1952 - 6/18/2013


I am who I am because of him
He’s the reason for my son’s name
He gave me my courage & my strength
To stand tall even when standing wasn’t easy
Stand for the ones who can’t
To think and fend for myself
I’m my Daddy made over

Taught me to fight back 
To never back down
How to pick myself back up
When I’ve been knocked down
Fight for what I believe
I’m my Daddy made over

He gave me my stubbornness 
Gave me my pride
Gave me my temper
Taught me not to take crap
To speak my mind no matter who
Work for what I want
I’m my Daddy made over

How to keep my emotions in check
How to handle large amounts of pain
When in trouble he always had my back
He knew how my mind worked better than anyone
I got it from him
I’m my Daddy made over

Even though he’s gone
I’ll stand and continue on 
I may stumble I may fall 
May even get hurt along the way
But I’ll pick myself back up
I’ll dust myself off and stand tall
I’m honored and proud to say
I’m my Daddy made over


Sabrina Niday Hansel



Details | Elegy | |

I Need Your Help Daddy

I’m tired
I’m Physically and Emotionally tired
I don’t want to be the strong one anymore
I can’t this time
I don’t know what to do Daddy
I need your help down here

I can’t get back in control of my emotions 
I’m having a hard time dealing with your absence
I’m having a hard time standing by myself
I need your help Daddy

I’m broken and lost without you Daddy
I need your will to want to carry on
I need your strength to over come this
I need your strength to stay standing
Your courage to fight back again
I need your help 

Please Daddy I’m at a loss
How am I suppose to do this
I need your guidance 
I need you to guide me back
To whom I was before
I need your help Daddy
I need your help







Details | Free verse | |

Dementia

He was always so happy
strong and bold.
He'd give you the shirt off of his back.
Tough.
Independent.
He had a rough life
growing up through the depression,
but like he always does,
he got through it.
He has two boys, of whom he is so proud.
Moved from Regina, to Victoria.
He had the best life anyone his age could have wanted.
But ever since his wife died, 
he has not been the same.
Sad
Lonely
Empty.
But like he has always done,
he got through it.
Mind slipping, 
just a little forgetful.
That's how it always starts out...
But like always, he powered through it, 
until now...
He is not the same person that I used to know.
He been sentenced to the prison in his own mind.
Possessed by the thoughts of his dogs ashes.
He likes to play the blame game,
but we know he doesn't remember that it was him.
He wakes up in the night
shaking with pain, 
tears streaming down his face.
There is nothing we can do,
Oh well...
Two more tylenol.
Hold on to hope
for as long as you can,
It's only a matter of time now.
He gets vocal, a very loud tone.
He'll block you in your room
and make false accusations
But we know that it's the pain induced monster in him.
Tick tock, tick tock...
You can't handle the stress anymore
you have to leave.
Just hope for the best, 
maybe it will get better.
Surprise, it doesn't.
Your denial is foolish, everyone knows 
what happens next.
Sedation
Medication
Anger
Hurt
All results of
dementia


Details | Free verse | |

Moments In Time

The sweetest sounds of burning trees
A gentle stroking in the breeze
The calm has lasted past the storm
Cloudy visions, Satan’s roar
Too many sights have passed my way
A time found only in the haze
The softest screams are running bare
My aching bones creak as I stare

You walk a distance towards me
The fall’s eternal, can’t you see?
I’m a memory in your heart
I whisper to you in the dark

The battle’s started at the end
No one is coming to repent
The sinners grab their wine from prey
No judgment calling here to stay
The sport is reckless to be told
The one is laughing at his souls
It falters nowhere to be sure
The power grows forevermore
Like a spirit in the wind
I have no say in where you’ve been 
But cross the line to come to me
And pay the price for ecstasy

You walk a distance towards me
The fall’s eternal, can’t you see?
I’m a memory in your heart
I whisper to you in the dark. 


Details | Villanelle | |

When I Ruled the World

I remember when I held the world in these hands
Nothing out of reach as I self proclaimed my power
That time long forgotten the hourglass lost it’s sand

Yes I lived in a world of deadlines and demands
  A master of time, always early at least half an hour
I remember when I held the world in these hands

Always alert sensing my victory before my stand
Any obstacle or objection I would quickly devour
That time long forgotten the hourglass lost it’s sand

Is there anything left of that person, maybe a strand
It’s not from any fear, but indifference that I cower
I remember when I held the world in these hands

For this tragic change I could have never planned
Everything that tasted so sweet is now bitter and sour
That time long forgotten the hourglass lost it’s sand

Almost six years later, I still cannot understand
In the late hours of night, I’m left to now scour
I remember when I held the world in these hands
That time long forgotten the hourglass lost it’s sand



Penned by Wayland Bunch II 12/14/2013 for With These Hands contest
I used image #6 for this poem


Details | Narrative | |

The Empty Tissue Box

My heart was in such pain
I felt like I was going to go insane
I just don't know what to do 
And my eyes full of tears that distort my view

I fell to my knees and felt the urge
My muscle tighten and pin needles struck me like a surge
My body was warm and with feelings so confused
My mind felt sadness had fused

I could not conquer my fears
I just sat down and fell into tears
When some close to you passes on
It felt like a warmth has gone

So I raised my hand towards a box that was empty with no tissue
I first was embarrass and had a little bit of issue
All my friends hugged me and said sorry for your loss
So now I cry in my bed and toss


April 14, 2013


Details | Free verse | |

Rebirth

Ignite,
The missing light,
Forget,
What's behind.
Just believe,
That love comes again...

'Cause,
The skies,
Are like a hard glide,
In a shining rainbow's light...

All dreams and fantasies,
Can be reality,
'Cause fantasy,
Is based on reality...
But all histories aren't the same...

'Cause,
Sometimes, we dive,
In our lives...

So,
Don't judge,
For what you see,
Judge,
For what it is...,
'Cause time passes,
But, memories remain...

And,
Listen,
To your heart,
'Cause,
The body, does,
The mind, thinks,
And, the heart, feels...,
While, the soul, lives...

So,
Always remember,
To remember the past,
To live the present,
And to wait and pursue the future...

Listen to your heart,
Before you are telling goodbye,
'Cause destiny,
Might lead to demise...,
But, remember that destiny can be changed...

Life is unpredictable,
But space and time,
Could be controlled...
And even if some die,
We may survive...

Remember,
That life,
Might have an endless beginning...

All that remains,
Is to be reborn...


Details | Free verse | |

I would like to fly away - - -

To soar, take wing, take flight, glide ~ Be detached, apart from this life's reality Where past sorrows shroud my remembering To seal the heavy door to the past And to flutter on the edge of dreams To tremble, hover, grasping, peaceful and happy In imagination, floating and drifting Like a breathtaking butterfly with gossamer wings But then, but then ~ The cold fingers of the past come creeping Monsters, ogres, beasts of the long ago Memories screaming, shrieking, shattering my soul The beautiful lost in the carnage Oh the tears, the weeping, the eternal floating sadness The heavy door to the past is bolted, secure Impenetrable with many padlocks and thick chains Where anguish and bliss entwine in an endless battle And happiness died long, long ago But from time to time, whispering A single memory finds a way From under that weighty door locked, chained And I crush the sweetness to my broken heart, weeping . . . April 28, 2013 Free Verse


Details | Ballad | |

Silent House

The house stands mute, broken by years...
Windows stare through jagged glass.
Empty as the eyes of death.
Silent void...echoing joy..patient tears,
reach out in memory each time I pass
the gaping door which has no breath.
 
A rusted lamp-post leans toward Earth...
listening for approaching sound,
to light the darkness once more.
Quiet hush...resounding mirth,
touch my step upon the ground,
and beckon me in, to the shattered house.
 
Crushed boards once held dancing feet...
laughter clings to crumbled stones,
and tears strain the silent rooms.
Scattered remnants of life replete,
lie still as whitened desert bones,
and words spoken...here entombed.
 
I gaze upon torn and tattered walls...
Time pauses, and whispers soft to me
of life blossomed rich in moments gone.
Of a woman whose memory recalls
the beauty of love...and eternity...
mirrored in a rose upon the lawn.
 
House so sad, your youth abounds,
neath fallen grace, and buried sounds.
I hear your song in distant night,
and stand before your silent sight.
 


Details | Lyric | |

All on Me

All on Me

My childhood is sketchy too many
Holes 
Yet as those holes fill in
I do not like what I see
So many secrets 
So much pain
My innocence was lost
No wonder I never acted like a child
Still I feel like it was 

All on Me

Be strong, be brave 
Be silent 
Never tell a soul
No one will understand
This love we share
And so it went 

All on Me

Even now as I remember 
Each awful moment 
I wonder what I could have done
To avoid it all together
I wonder what would have happened 
If I had spoke up
However all the what ifs in the world
Will never change the fact that it is 

All on Me

Sometimes I feel like the 
Pain is going to last forever
I am so scared that the glimpse of happiness I once had 
Is all I will ever see
Yet I won’t give up and
I won’t give in
Because if I do then he will win
Then it will be

All on Me 

Instead of 

All on Him

By: Jeanna York
10-21-2013




Details | I do not know? | |

Essence of Betrayal

Betrayal, like the coldest wind that
turns to ice in your veins 
That cannot be liquefied by 
apologetic words or obvious guilt 
It only seems to melt when we accept
that people will always do what they want 
But shards always remain and the 
shock still lingers in the memory 
Because you never saw it coming 
But now you watch for it and 
although the ice has melted, the
coldness reminds you to expect it...


Details | Narrative | |

He Loved You

He loved you too, you know
Loved you like his very own
In away you were
You came into his life as my friend
Through the years you grew to be my brother in arms 
Along the way you became the son he never had

He loved you as a friend
He loved you even more as a son
A son he never had
When things began to spiral out of control
You stayed when so many others ran away
You helped when I couldn’t

You meant a great deal to him
You never looked at him differently 
Nor did you treat him differently
You stood by his side
When he fell, you stood by his side and mine
You were willing to help me fight his battle for him 
You were there from the beginning 
You were there until the bitter end
Always remember my friend, my brother
He loved you more than you’ll ever know


____________________________________________________________
Dedicated to close Family friend Rodney Howard. He loved my Daddy just as much as I did/do.


Details | Epic | |

We Lost More Than a Dad

We lost more than just a Dad that day
We lost half of how we came to be
We lost we four girls first love
We lost our Best Friend

We lost more than just a Dad that day
Our Mom lost her Soul Mate, Her other half 
Our children lost their Papaw
We lost our family’s foundation 
We lost the glue that held us together

We lost more than just a Dad that day
We lost the Strongest man we ever knew 
We lost the man we looked up too
We lost we four girls Teacher of many things

We lost more than just a Dad that day
We four girls lost our Hero
We lost some of our Light
We lost part of our Heart
We lost part of our Soul

We lost more than just a Dad that day
We lost some of our Courage
We lost some of our Strength
We lost some of our will to fight back
We lost some of our will to carry on
We four girls lost more than a Dad
We lost more than just a Dad that day


Details | Lyric | |

I Hate You Cancer

Dedicated to my Dad who lost his short battle w/ Colon Cancer on June 18,2013

I hate you Cancer
Your vile evil and cruel
You don't care who you hurt
I'll never forget that day
I'll always hate you for it

Your heartless Cancer
You took someone important from me
Someone important from others too
Took people who didn't belong to you
I hate you for it

You disgust me Cancer
You had no right to take him from me
He mattered more than my very own life
I hate you for taking my Daddy
I hate you for taking others too

I hate you with a passion Cancer
You took part of my heart with him
You took part of my soul that day too
I hate you for it
I hate you I hate you I hate you

I hate you with every fiber of my being 
Go back to Hell where you belong
I hate you, others hate you
Your not welcome or wanted here Cancer

I hate you more than his doctor's
I hate you more than God
I hope I get to witness that day
Witness the day you fall
And you will fall Cancer

You're gonna lose the battle one day Cancer
I'm gonna laugh and dance around your grave
You'll finally get what you deserve 
And you'll never be able to take another soul


Sabrina Niday Hansel


______________________________________________________________________
Placed 8th in Poet Destroyer A's  2013 "PINKTOBER" Contest

Please Support a Cure for Colon Cancer & every other type!









Details | Qasida | |

I Miss You

When the moonlight in its fullest,
Is spreading over the night,
Your memory at this point,
Pains my heart dearly,
I miss you…
The stories of spring,
Of these past beautiful views,
Return back to me,
And fills my eyes with tears,
I miss you…
At least tell me this much,
That this moonlight comes to you,
And wakes up dreams in you,
And teases you too,
I miss you…
When the moonlight in its fullest,
Is spreading over the night,
Your memory at this point,
Pains my heart dearly,
I miss you…
The stories of spring,
Of these past beautiful views,
Return back to me,
And fills my eyes with tears,
I miss you…
When the moments of those days, 
Come by and touch you,
The memories of past days,
Take my sleep away,
I miss you…
When the moonlight in its fullest,
Is spreading over the night,
Your memory at this point,
Pains my heart dearly,
I miss you…
When my memory,
Brings tears to your eyes every moment,
When every breath of parting,
Becomes difficult to breathe,
Then forget everything around you,
And return to me,
Break every relation
And come decorate my dreams,
Don’t leave me after that,
When the moonlight in its fullest,
Is spreading over the night,
Your memory at this point,
Pains my heart dearly,
I miss you…
The stories of spring,
Of these past beautiful views,
Return back to me,
And fill my eyes with tears,
I miss you…
My heart aches for you…


Details | Munaajaat | |

Tell Me

I'm lost hurt and angry
Why did you take his life
I want, No I need to know
Tell me, Tell me why
I deserve to know

Haven't you done enough to him
What'd he ever do to you
He suffered his whole life
Suffered more than anyone deserved
Tell me, Tell me why you did it
I have a right to know

Why'd you let him born to them
Born to worthless parents
Parents who didn't care
They threw him away like garbage
Pawned him off on someone else
Tell me, Tell me why
Explain how you could do that

You gave him Polio
You let others treat him like disease
You took away the full use of his legs
You warped his hand and foot
Tell me, Explain to me why
I deserve to know

You let others think he was crazy
You let it go on for over year
You didn't stop it, Why
Tell me, Give me your reason
Answer me, Help me to understand

You go and make matters worse
You gave him Cancer
You didn't give him a chance to fight back
You just jerked him away from us
Tell me, Tell me how
How you could be so cruel

How can others not question you
When others do it, It's murder
But when it's by your hand
It's your will, Their fate
Tell me, What makes you so different
Your no better than the demons knocking at the door

You heard me beg and plead
You know I'm not afraid to die
I was willing to carry it all for him
I was willing to take my Daddy's place
You didn't even let me say Goodbye
Tell me, Tell me why I couldn't take his place
Answer me, you owe me that much



Sabrina Niday Hansel
~Niday40873~

(motif) Spiritual


Details | Lyric | |

Don't Cry

Please don't cry over my casket 
For I am not there 
Please don't cry at my grave 
My soul has been set free 
I know it's hard not to cry 
I've been down that road one to many times 

I have no more pain 
I have no more sickness 
And I would not change a thing 
As I walk threw the gates of Heaven 
Mom Dad our brothers and sisters 
Will welcome me with open arms 
Here I am free of that pain 

Don't blame yourself 
It was my time to go home 
This is where I'm supposed to be 
Don't dwell on things which you can not change 
I will always be in your heart 

I will always be watching over you 
When that day comes for you to come home
I will be there to welcome you 
With open arms
And walk you threw the gates of Heaven 
You will be greeted by our family & friends
Who came home before you 
Until that day I will be watching over you


Details | Dramatic Verse (Verse Drama) | |

Shunned

Breaking down in the heart and mind.
With all regrets that are truly not kind.
Shocked at people are, so painful to see.
Abused with hated and ecstasy.
Violated and directed with torments
Lost of words or comments.
Hatred gushing out of life long experience.
Reminding yourself to become absence.
Coward and scared to even breathe.
Like the feeling of knives unsheathe.
Sharp but not enough to cut.
Enough to scare like a door that immediately shut.
The hand raised to help you is a lie.
It is a hand that slaps you so you can die.
Rough around the edges.
Crawling in your dreams in ledges.
Powered to stay alive.
You feel people want you to take a dive.
Just stop, and fall down.
Hoping to break your mental crown.
Hiding a feeling that never feels real.
Like shaking hands with demons for a deal.
Blocked out, out of your own story.
Thinking that people are stealing your glory.
Ashamed with fear.
With eyes that are full of tear.
Lost in such hidden romance.
Luck has it seems to be a dance.
Moving around in your head.
With scary thoughts and dread.
Feels like you never leave.
So you feel so many that grieve.
In your mind that is lost.
Full of drama that holds you down in cost.
Keeping in the shadow.
You watch people so shallow.
Gut instinct says that life with them is a muse.
When your just standing your accuse.
Society is just so lame.
Like all the people that are in it your to blame.
Soloing life is a brief.
Walking away is some what a relief.
I dreamed of many things.
With beautiful sorrows of wings.
Wavered in a direction that leads no where.
Escaping everything by a hair.
Pointing into the sky.
And asking yourself why.
The cage is so big.
Just enough to put on a huge rig.
Moving back and fourth.
It feels that your life does not have a worth.
Caned by laws of laughter to deceive.
Shackled up to be bent to your will to receive.
When you hope to hope.
A person can just show you the rope.
They have such friendly hands.
Like the deserts of sands.
Dangerous it is to just keep walking in it.
Lost cannot find your way even a little bit.
Just seem like your heart feels dry.
Then you give up and give a sigh.
That moment that you do is just all a dream.
You are really in a ward you will scream.
Thrust upon you because you could not protect.
So what cost you is this effect.
Warping in to your mind to leave this place.
You feel full of disgrace.
With nothing to drink.
Causing your true self to think.
Grief is such a pain with sorrow to gain.
Looking out in your own rain.




Details | Free verse | |

Grandma

There's not much to say.
I knew her, know some things,
but certainly not all.

I know how little she put up with fools,
how her cooking surpassed so many others',
how simultaneously sweet and hard she could be.
I know about her smoking,
about her jewelry, her faith,
all these I'll hold close to me.

Every single spark, every star,
shines with such a glow, such a marvelous radiance,
that we can't gaze too closely at it,
lest we cause ourselves pain.
And yet, despite ourselves, again and again,
we do;
because it's not within us to resist
the sheer beauty of it all,
of stories and of life.

A bouquet of tulips for you.
We all miss you already, Grandma.
I miss you.
I know Heaven's got you, taking no guff as always,
making sure we're all doing alright.
I love you.
Andrew James (McGillicutty) Sprouse


Details | Elegy | |

A TEAR FOR DADDY

written 22nd Oct 2013



Even after sixteen years
 still I cry your daughters tears
Every year on this day, will always be sad
 known only as the date, God took my dad

    1st June 1954- 22nd Oct 1997
    
         Allan Thomas Holmes


Details | Iambic Pentameter | |

The Rememberer

She sits and glances out the window gray
The glass just mocks and fogs her weary eyes.
The dancing candle fails to light her way
As darkness causes heavy, weary sighs.

But memory just shades her vision more.
A cloak of lies, like ice, then stuns her heart.
Her weak and weary feet won't leave the floor,
The window tears her wilting soul apart.

The sun once lit her flowing, golden hair,
And moon once filled her eyes with silver light,
But past has killed the gold that once was there
And now, her eyes are darker than the night.

The days, we say, have worn away her life.
But she doth know that t'was her foolish strife.


Details | Rhyme | |

Eyes of Seminary

Eyes of Seminary – Zamreen Zarook

Every day in our lives has different fragrance,
God give us various things in abundance,
Day by day knowledge is gained in accordance,
Things depend according to the attendance.

Two years of studies,
Helped us to come out with various abilities,
Extremely joyful moments with buddies,
But life said every aspect has its boundaries.

Teachers become very friendly,
They approach us very kindly,
They speak on us exaggeratedly,
Because they know, if not we might behave badly.

Big shots in the school boundary,
These are years of foundry,
It helped us to find and go for laundry,
Marvelous days, fully packed with sundry.


Various angles the kith and kins are civilized,
It’s because our knowledge is enhanced,
Guys and girls turned well experienced,
That’s why we call it levels of advanced.


Details | Free verse | |

The Autumn Affect

There's something unspecific about the autumn nights
A certain shade of color that uplifts my inner child's eyes
Beside a cashmere moon Venus and Jupiter shine bright
Complimented by a sea of blinking infinite twilight
The scent of burning oak lingers in the air from home made fires
Reminiscent of a time when this man was just a child
Careless and so free to dream and any dream to live
Like feathers floating across a field carried by the wind
As a gentle breeze blows through the leaves shivering delightful gloom
Unlike flowers of springtime the disheveled autumn vibrance bloom
Leaves crackle beneath my feet along the skeleton tree path
Where I try to find my peace or a song to make me laugh
The air is so much crisper and also soothing when I breathe it in
Underneath a starry sky and brighter constellations of Heaven
Amidst the trail I pass a lovely couple holding hands
While their children run aside frolicking in a playful dance
An old man and his wife admire the view from a wooden bench 
With smiles on their face as if nostalgia is still their closest friend
Its these specific autumn affects that bring me sorrows and joy
Reminding me of all theses things Ive wanted as a man since I was a little boy 
Its times like these that I wish I wasn't always so alone
Because I would light an fire with my family and call it home


Details | Free verse | |

If Old Men Fought

An old man looking out his door,
gaze fixed on a distant shore,
reminiscing to a time, not of happiness,
or, the prospect of a bright future,
to when he was sick to his very core,
to when as a youth, he went to war

A time before infallibility had meaning,
patriotism and bravado the craze,
the future was still unknown,
vigor for life at its all time high,
a time for romance, partying, buying,
no thought of pain, deformity, dying

Too young to understand or question,
ship to foreign shore, medals abound,
will impress the girls next time in town,
sacrifice not temporary,
forever more,
a legacy etched into a wall, few will remember,
flesh shredded, burned, torn,
families mourn

A time, when he willingly went to war,
will happen no more,
all lost in youth, now unrelenting,
no blind obedience,
minimal risk,
long life, his number one ambition

As he turns back from the door,
he thinks of the youth,
here now, soon no more,
lessons never learned,
the call to war,
to common the roar,
complacency the mood,
another generation removed

The old man agonizes
over what was originally not known,
war is preventable,
life too precious to waste,
the solution simple,
his vision, maybe too late

Send old men to the front to fight,
arthritis, heart disease, poor eyesight,
let the youth enjoy their life,
his near over, its only right

Send old men, to the front, to fight
ask them to give up their life,
patriotism and bravado, still alive,
will and desire would not last the night,
old men do not rush to death in their twilight,
failure inevitable, the old man smiles,
knows he's right

Wars not possible,
if old men, are sent to fight


Details | I do not know? | |

My Rap In Loving Memory Of My Loved Ones

DAY BY DAY GROWING UP WAY 
TOO FAST 
 WISH I COULD GO BACK TO THE 
PAST ,
 THATS A DREAM I KNOW WONT 
LAST,
 I REMEMBER ALWAYS BEING TOLD 
,
 BY 3 PPL WITH HEARTS OF GOLD,
 TO STAND UP FOR MYSELF 
 AND FAMILY N DO AS IM TOLD...
 WE ALL LIVED IN ONE BIG ASS
 HOUSE ON PATTERSON AVE,
 THATS WERE ALL MY BOY CUZNS
 I GREW UP WITH TURNED ME INTO 
SAVV
 THEY TAUGHT MY ASS HOW TO 
FIGHT 
 N MY MOM AND MA TELLIN ME TO 
DO 
 WATS RIGHT,..
 MA N PAPA TOOK CARE OF US 
ALL,,,
 THEY WAS THERE ALL WE 
 HAD TO DO.. 
 WAS MAKE ONE PHONECALL..
 BUT THESE LAST FEW YEARS 
Things STARTED 
 TO CHANGE,,THOSE WE LOVE 
BEGIN TO PASS 
 AWAY,,UNCLE WILLIAM ,JC, JESSE, 
MY MA N MOM,,
 N THEN GOD EVEN TOOK MY PAPA,,
 MY LIFE SEEMS TO BE FALLING 
apart MORE N MORE EACH
 DAY THE ONES CLOSEST TO ME 
,MADE WHO I AM TODAY HAD 
 ALREADY GONE N PASSED 
AWAY,,LOST FOR WORDS 
EMPTINESS
 N PAIN ,JUST ME N MY BBYS N 
WAT FAMS LEFT..


Details | Acrostic | |

Your Eyes

 (Dedicated to Folake)

Your eyes, woman
are like twilight rainbow
amorously bearing aloft passions of mine
toward androcytic ecstacy.
They tell of endless lights.

Night skies clarion the warmth of you
keep me balled-up till
i am tilted to your adorned essence.

May I call up words to adore you,
agglomerate them into a panoply of worshippers
unsandalled before you
like Moses at the burning bush.
 
And now you seem to fall asleep
but you tell me it's the heavy night
bidding toward a sunny dawn
wherein our love is lighted.

Slowly I let you fall asleep
impatient with the long night
waiting to gaze once more
into the eyes of my lovely love.

Then a lip is placed on yours
and you rouse up wide-eyed
smiling at my romantic move.
We enjoyed the night, cruising on.


Details | Narrative | |

My Hidden Fear

People are my weakness and hidden fear
I just feel that some words they say set me in tear
For example I gave a person a smile one day and they gave me a glare
I did not know that smiling in the world today cause people to stare
These types of stare gave me chills down my spine a feeling that made me blind
Why? why is my weakness the people who are very unkind
Hiding is all I can do when people give me a unkind view
I get to a point that my fear seems to wonder and stew
People are who they are and what should I even do
I don't understand that they are evil and some times nice too
My hidden fear are people just because they are always around
That is no argument and my feeling are perfectly sound
The hate builds up in my mind, but does not bother, how my heart feel
I learned to undergo a change that my feelings become like steel
Hard as it should be in situations needed I forget how to use it
So it becomes my weapon and it is to some people heartless just a bit
My hidden fear is what I see in people today
They harm others and they think it is okay
That is why I fear my feelings for others at times because it is so confusing
My hidden fear is some what bad and some what a blessing


Details | Bio | |

Solitude: To Yoda, An Ode

Green bark a prism creates,
Feel the pull of earth, you must.

Rotates, a slime of endless hates,
Can hold me not, this world’s crust.

Friendship’s ties, isolation Deflates,
Succumbs, my spaceship, to bitter rust.

Mist, my soul forever permeates,
Lift-off, booms the rocket’s thrust.

My spirit when light returns, elates,
Swamps swell, swallowed hope’s swirling dust.

Trapped, I am, until student from fate
Arrives to learn; Cloud City or bust.


Details | Dramatic monologue | |

SUNSET AT NOON

The day becomes night;
As a comrade transcend 
To true world beyound.
Oh! Finally, a jolly good fellow drops the baton;
A justice of peace with unstained character,
A sacrificial giver who neglected his needs.
Death, you never cease to amase
As you drive home valiant colleagues.
Death! Hope you know?
Here a while we must be parted
Because
For a while the tired body
Erupt in sleep.
Soul and body reunited.
Thence; death, nothing shall divide 
Father, mother, child and brethren.
Nevertheless, the dead, you were great while alive
And great in death.
The pens, sleep till we meet and part no more.


      WRITTEN BY EDORE PAUL OYAKHILOME
	0092348081195600, 0092348131176767
	DEDICATED TO  JOURNALISTS . 


Details | Free verse | |

Thinking Of You

I remember happiness,
No more,
No less,
Only true love.

I imagined,
You beside me...

I remember your eyes,
I remember your lips,
I feel your love,
I know your life...


Details | Free verse | |

On A Lonely Bench

Sitting on a lonely bench,

Memories got me blenched,

Your heart I tried to clench,

Though, the rains got me drenched,

From hearts I needed to entrench...

 

Your words not retrenched,

From things I wanted to bent,

While you often tended to bend,

Without letting me mend...

 

You, I tried to fend,

You borrowed and erased te times I used to lend,

Manipulated and used by you,

Pretending to be a friend...

 

From hallows I scended

From errors you descended,

My life wished to be attended.

Even though, you got me expended,

My hands were still extended,

Even though, you got me offended...

 

The times I misspended,

You still condescended me,

Though, the changes were about to be impended,

I was still amended,

And I was still intended...

 

But, I was not comprehended,

Even though, you were condemned and untamed,

While I was aimed to be blamed,

Still, more thing you wanted to borrow and gain...

 

Although, this is the end,

The ways, I will paint,

For the pains to get unbended,

As I contemplate nature and life,

With memories that swayed and portended,

As my soul slowly transcended,

While sitting on a lonely bench...


Details | I do not know? | |

The Women



The Women



(for the countless women, names unknown, who bore the brunt of Apartheid, and who fought the racist system at great cost to themselves and their families, and for my mother, Zubeida Moolla)



Pregnant, your husband on the run,
your daughter, a child, a few years old,

they hauled you in, these brutish men,
into the bowels of Apartheid's racist hell.



They wanted information, you gave them nothing,
these savage men, who skin happened to be lighter,

and white was right in South Africa back then,

but, you did not cower, you stood resolute,

you, my mother, faced them down, their power,
their 'racial superiority', their taunts, their threats.



You, my mother, would not, could not break,

You stood firm, you stood tall.

You, like the countless mothers did not break, did not fall.



You told me many things, of the pains, the struggles,

the scraping for scraps, the desolation of separation
from your beloved Tasneem and your beloved Azad,

my elder sister and brother, whom I could not grow
up with, your beloved children separated by time, by place,

by monstrous Apartheid, by brutish men,
whose skin just happened to be lighter.



You told me many things, as I grew older,
of the years in exile, of the winters that grew ever colder.

You were a fighter, for a just cause,
like countless other South African women,

you sacrificed much, you suffered the pangs,
of memories that cut into your bone, your marrow,

you resisted a system, an ideology, brutal and callous and narrow.



Yes, you lived to see freedom arrive, yet you suffered still,
a family torn apart, and struggling to rebuild a life,

all the while, nursing a void, that nothing could ever fill.



I salute you, mother, as I salute the nameless mothers,

the countless sisters, daughters, women of this land,
who fought, sacrificing it all for taking a moral stand.



I salute you, my mother, and though you have passed,
your body interred in your beloved South African soil,

you shall remain, within me, an ever-present reminder,

of the cost of freedom, the struggles, the hunger, the toil.


I salute you!



(for the brave women of South Africa, of all colours,
who fought against racial discrimination and Apartheid)






Details | Epitaph | |

That's Chuck, He's my Friend

What's that in your hand?. Let me see.. He said.
It's a picture; that`s Chuck; he is my friend... I said.
You pick your friends kinda young, don't you?... He said.
No, that was a long time ago. We were in college... I said.
I'd like to hear more about your pal Chuck... He said.

Okay... I met Chuck in New Paltz in `74... I said.
Oh, that's the pot smoking college, isn't it... He said.
Don't generalize, everyone's not the same... I said.
You're right. So tell me some more about Chuck... He said.
Okay, so you want the short version, or long one ... I said.
Whatever you like, I have plenty of time ... He said.

Well, this guy Chuck approaches me; he looks perplexed... I said.
So what was his issue. Why that look on his face... He said.
Chuck tells me "No one will stay with me in the room."... I said.
How odd is that? That doesn't make sense... He said.
You and I swing one way, Chuck swings the other. ... I said.
Now I see what the problem was; What did you do?... He said.
What do you think ? That doesn't bother me.... I said.

Hey, you want to hear a funny story? It's a side splitter... I said.
I've got time. I could use a good laugh right about now... He said.
Chuck had a 53 Schwinn bicycle, all chrome, red and white... I said.
You've got to be kidding me. I haven't seen one in years.... He said.
I'd hop on back. We`d go to town and chug down a few together... I said.
That's not funny. Where's the punchline? So what happened?... He said.
Well, one day Chuck failed a test and got super pissed off.... I said.
That's not funny either. You've got to do better than that.... He said.
He yanked on the handlebar so hard, he busted it clean in half... I said.
Wow ! Did they have "Funniest Home Videos" back then?... He said.

That's not all. We had so much fun together. There's more... I said.
Don't keep me in suspense. Lay it on me..... He said
There was this girl; unique with a special attribute.... I said.
What was so special? Three breasts instead of two?... He said.
No joke, her name was Madam Clittora! Enough said... I said.
I can't believe that. You gonna leave me hanging?... He said.

Anyway, shortly after that, I graduated. Chuck was younger.... I said.
So what happened to Chuck? Good friends keep in touch... He said.
We saw him two years later. We visited With his family, was nice... I said.
Ever see them again? You shouldn't desert a friend.... He said. 
You're right. But things don't always pan out... I said.
So what does that mean? You both seemed quite close.... He said.

I was married at the time with a lot of responsibilities... I said.
So that's no excuse. You should've kept in touch... He said.
After that, I didn't. Time changes things. Wasn't intentional.... I said.
So is there more to this story? There's got to be more... He said.
Oh, there is. Time moves on. 35 years later... I said.

It's 2010 and out of the blue, I think of my old pal Chuck... I said.
So you didn't forget him after all, but almost... He said.
It's a gamble, Chuck Drzal was in the phonebook; I called... I said.
Good for you. You took a chance, renewed a friendship... He said.
You're right. Just like old times. `74 again. What a feeling... I said.
So what happened next. Tell me quick, can't wait... He said.

We talked off and on, old times and new things; it was good... I said.
So it sounds like things are really working out for you guys... He said.
We saw Chuck, in the summertime; looked good for 52... I said.
Hey that's great news; Is there more to the story?... He said.

A little more... His friend died the day after we saw him... I said.
Oh, bummer. Sorry to hear that. How`s Chuck now?... He said.
Called him in November. His diamond ring was stolen... I said.
Wow ! That's a real downer. Did they catch the bastard?... He said
No !... I said.

There's got to be more than that. Call him since then?... He said..
Yeah... but... I called twice... he never answered the phone... I said.
Well, I hope you find out how he is doing?... He said.
I did. Saw his obit a few days ago. He died November 17th... I said.
 
 He looked at me. A tear rolled down his cheek... He said nothing..
I looked at him. Couldn't speak, all choked up.... I said nothing.
He looked at me. Gave me a hug, turned and walked away.
I yelled to the universe... "That's Chuck, he's my friend!"


Details | Dramatic Verse (Verse Drama) | |

The Rain and Wind

The wind blew events all over the place.
Intense emotions and it gave chase.
Lightning lighting to show us the sky.
People try to sleep and not cry.
Wisping by the wind keeps us awake.
The time trying to sleep the storms take.
Chills in everyone gives all shiver.
The clouds surrounded by moonlight is silver.
Heavenly prayers that the rain will stop.
The flood stopped a car the person in it was a cop.
People have seen such devastation.
The road that people made was week in creation.
Rivers near by was over flowing.
Trees that were there was not showing.
By the hour it claimed many.
My father woke up and did not see any.
Floating by was a boat.
Keeping people above water and a float.
My father kept a canoe.  
That some day we would use it, that he knew.
Time to paddle up and down the street.
The rain water kept getting on our seat.
It was so dark after the moon was behind the cloud.
Still the noise of thunder still covered the ears loud.
The smell of moist water never seem to go away.
My brothers seem to still sleep anyway.
My head was bobbing up and down.
I was so tired that I could not hear a sound.
The wind blew back and fourth.
It seems that my mom and dad paddle their worth.
Till all the people we saw with grace.
Help us out with embrace.
The time was so late at night.
Everyone was so sleepy and losing sight.
The fight with the weather was so hectic.
The feelings of energy was electric.
Losing to such natural disaster is hard to understand.
When people working hard to block the river with bags of sand.
With hard workers like my mom and dad.
They make things happen that is not bad.
Rough with weather they experience more than ever.
Leaders they are they are very clever.
From the night light of street lights to the morning glow.
The wind did not stop so.
Bringing in more clouds that ill.
The people who were still tired still had will.
The rush of water and waves blasting push the wall side.
Pushing and the force brought water inside.
The battle of our hour was getting long.
Backup people came to aid us was strong.
Rested they were to keep everyone with hope.
The people stopped the water with the strength of rope.
Heavy rain and loss of homes bring people together.
It is kind of sad that this was the only time to gather.
Chaos comes happiness how true.
This is why we are human that gives us a clue.
It is our nature to keep rain falling.
To know when it is time for our calling.
The winds bring such pain and sorrow.
That is why rain sometimes fallow.








Details | Narrative | |

Physically and Mentally Abuse

I was born in a world of poverty and soiled life of a third world country
The way I lived till I was five years of age was walls of boundary
These walls had towers of guards that had no heart or care
If a child would try to climb the wall they lose their life I swear

Father had drank and threatened my mother with a knife
My father lost his job and wife and that was the hardship of life
He stopped my mother from taking off with me in her arm
Hoping that my father would ignore and left me be with no harm

When my father went off to drink one night and came home with rage
My brothers stood by my crib and took a beating that set up the next stage
My father had woken up to three scared children half starved and in pain
His final words as he walk away from the orphanage gate live life do not go insane

I was still a baby in the orphanage; the caretakers did not really care about the babies
They stole items and materials those wicked men and maternal evil ladies
They starved all the babies because it cost a lot to keep them alive
As a child of that age I could feel the sins and greed that gave out bad vibes

I was ignorant about what I drank and ate, as I see white maggots move in my bottle
As I see them move I thought about how they were playing and some were hostel
They ate each other to keep each other alive in a manner that took me by surprise
In the back round I hear others throwing things with sounds of painful cries

I got very strong at a young age I was able to start pulling myself up over the cage
My feelings were to see my brothers with strong lungs that I cried out of rage
My two brothers came to see me and sneak food into my crib
The caretaker would find the food in my hands as they grabbed it and hit me on my ribs

As painful as it was I kept eating the food with blood in my mouth as it was instinct
I sometimes laid in my crib dazed and confused with smell of death so distinct
With all my might I kept myself strong and climb the small wall
I finally was old enough to get out of the building and I could hear my brothers call

With tears of joy with short legs that ran as fast as my heart
I ran to my brothers arms and held their hands to have a new start
I grew stronger everyday but more things came into my life in a manner of dismay
If my brothers stay by my side I could smile and everyday their would be okay



Details | Narrative | |

Reminiscence

Prologue:
For whoever think story telling is that easy,
Would properly from this hilarious incident,
scene or whatever you might call it, would know is not.

                             *****************

Just some couple of months ago, I was invited
by a friend who knows me too well, back then in 
school as a funny guy and story teller and so he taught this
night, that his grand pa (who is a famous story teller 
of his village) had fall sick, I would be in a better position
to cover up for his father's so called responsibility
to his people. "For he (my friend's father, Williams) is a good story teller.
But what about me who has never faced 
the ample crowd with my 'cripple' tale unless sharing it with friends?" I mumbled.

In the middle of this enigma, my friend, John called me to the hot seat
to tell my tale to the unbearable crowd of adolescence. 

"God why am I here this day... But it shouldn't have been this day" I retorted.
The barbarian noise from the seats infront of me showed that truly I was 
in the middle of something and not lost...

"Uncle tell us a story!... Brother tell us a story!" the crowd shouted.

This day, I needed a free moment but they couldn't let me be.
"Once upon a time" they heard me said and they all resited.
" I am sorry, I am sorry let me restart it all over again".

Now in old man's voice, I told my tale before them:

"Once upon a time,
In our mothers' womb, when she
Ate, we ate. Goodnight!"

They all cannot but burst to laughter while I stood and walked to the room with my 
shame.
                                   
                                *****************

Anything after good night means nothing more till the next day.
Maybe I escaped the night by dissatisfying the emotions of those children,
in that scene, what about my friend? 
"Have I not brought shame to John's family? Did I do the 
right thing that full moon night?". My heart beats!

                               *****************

Epilogue:
Not even do the audience remember or care to ask me: (In kid's voice)
"What if my mother do not eat while in my pregnancy, what will happen to her?" or 
probably care to tell me: (Back to old man's voice) "What lesson they have derived from 
the tale before their departure... Oh! No sorry, my bashful departure from their sight." 

Note: The tale: "Once upon....Goodnight!" is a Haiku form of poetry.  
 














Details | Ballad | |

To Music

Sweet sounds so dear—
Pure timeless tones of gladness—
Your melodies bestir my soul to flight—
Through darkest night
And doleful days of sadness—
I thank you for my hope and banished fear,
Oh precious music, mine to hear.

In sorrow born—
From dust to dust we wander,
Lamenting, all too late, come winter frost,
The springtime lost.—
Our lives we vainly squander.
The mourning bells do toll for us, forlorn.—
Oh may we hark to heaven's horn!

Sweet sounds so dear—
Pure timeless tones of gladness—
Your melodies bestir my soul to flight—
Through darkest night
And doleful days of sadness—
I thank you for my hope and banished fear,
Oh precious music, mine to hear.


– Harley White

[Song Lyrics for 'An die Musik' – Franz Schubert (1797–1828) ]


Details | Lyric | |

First Hello, Last Good Bye

When I first meet you it was hard to say hello
Over the years we had great memories
These memories will be in my heart forever

The day I heard you died it brought tears to my eyes
I did not get a chance to say good bye to you
Now you are gone but not forgotten

You are now in a better place
A place where you can live in peace
I want to see you again someday

This day for me is very sad
I know deep in my heart I have to let you go
It is hard for me to say goodbye


Details | Lyric | |

It's Not Over

Don’t say it’s all over (cause it’s not)
“Sorry” won’t cover it…so don’t go on your knees and pray for my forgiveness 
Oh baby…don’t listen to the commotion…I’m done taking cover (it’s all for naught)
I’m plummeting in slow motion…into the remorseful pit…I’m plummeting in my nightmare’s abyss

I want to carry you through the night… 
I’m swimming in the ocean of my tears… 
My sodden wings lost its ability of flight…
You've been swimming in your distress for years… 

Shut up! Don’t say it...
Don’t even think of it (don’t even ponder it)
Hey! Don’t say it’s all over…though we’re breaking bit by bit 
‘Cause there’s more treasure to discover 

I want to remind you to fight the good fight…
My misery pools are brewing inside of my head…
I’m backing away from the light & exploring the night… 
You’re giving in to sleep and I’m wide awake on my bed 

Shut up! Don’t say it...
Don’t even think of it (don’t even ponder it)
Hey! Don’t say it’s all over…though we’re breaking bit by bit 
‘Cause there’s more treasure to discover 

Please don’t tell me…oh, don’t tell me…darling!
You’re giving up today… (I beg you to stay, despite your inner pain) 
I’m scared I might erupt – it could be quite startling!
Someday, things will change for the better… (Don’t turn the wrong lane)
I’m waiting for that day to arrive – perhaps it will wash away our dismay…

I promise you a tranquil reality 
I want to stray with you tonight 
I still have hope that He’ll set us free
I was wondering if you could stay the night
Maybe the Lord could grant us 
Pure, incredible delight 

Shut up! Don’t say it...
Don’t even think of it (don’t even ponder it)
Hey! Don’t say it’s all over…though we've plunged into our own pit 
‘Cause there’s more treasure to gather…


Details | Rhyme | |

Your Special Day

(Dedicated to Danielle Bryant)

It's your special day
And I have so much to say.
Oh that time will let me,
There are thousands of things to make you see:

The happy times,
Lengthening with the clock's chimes;
The beautiful talks we exchanged,
Never believing there could be a change;

The midnight conversations,
Smiles on our faces our only compensation;
Our dreams and hopes,
The only reason we could cope.

Those moments we spent together
Are memories I'll cherish forever;
Memories I can look at and smile,
Knowing they are reasons to aim high.

Oh if I could do more than just words
And not pull memory chords!
It's your special day
And my own very special way
Of wishing a happy birthday
To a friend who just walked away.


Details | Abecedarian | |

Gone

Gone
After your last breath I was defeated,
Body, soul and spirit taken down.
Caressing memories became my new world,
Drowning in the past was solid ground.
Everything you did from start to finish,
Following me in my dreams so clear.
Great to know the time we had together
Harboured solace in my heart, sweet dear.
Innocence; the name of our beginning,
Joined as one we never were apart.
Kempt; seemed to be our life together,
Laughter always flowing from the heart.
Moments I shall keep in memories arc.

Nails like daggers pierced the world we started,
Offering us comfort, could no man.
Pain struck from the thought of being parted,
Quietly my darling took a stand.
Right down to the last he did not waver,
Standing tall and giving his vast love.
Tremendous was his courage as he traveled
Under wings of Angels brought above.
Veiled in sadness moving gently forward
Waiting for the sun to drown the rain.
Xanthic was the color of his golden hair
Yearning now to see it once again.
Zaps me at the thought of it my friend.

Written 08.29.2014
Brenda Meier-Hans 
1st


Details | Narrative | |

Dedication to Everyone

I feel that I have found a home in this cyberspace
with full of hearts and ideas in a special place
I wonder of all the people in the world to make me smile
with antics that help me grow in every mile
I do want to say to all of the people with respect
because of all of you my mind is not in a wreck
I would lie if I did not get ideas from all of you
without you my poems would not come true
I bless everyone with care 
with kindness and without dis-pare
I hold my hands high and put them together
with this I bless you with good weather
I do read some of the poems that people put out
sometimes I feel with out a doubt
I feel the pain in the poems that some has revealed
with hopes that they can read with their mind not sealed
I smile a bunch with every word
it is like a music in my head making a cord
I do want you all to know that you have made my day
to be a better day in every different array
I cherish my time with all the people in my heart
the words flow in my mind is just but a start
I'm happy with everyone in PoetrySoup.com 
with hardship that came this cyberspace makes me calm
I cannot choose five cause if I do I don't think it's right
just to tell you that is just my own insight
I thank all for helping me grow with all the poems that are shown
with faith and humor, with views of kindness this site has grown

If I had to say or dedicate my poems to who 
would be the first five who reads my poems with a point of view


Details | Free verse | |

For Suzanne, Green and Golden

“The October night comes down; returning as before
Except for a slight sensation of being ill at ease
I mount the stairs and turn the handle of the door
And feel as if I had mounted on my hands and knees.”
----- “Portrait of a Lady;” T. S. Eliot

A golden afternoon,
Late October, and my thoughts
Are all of you, Suzanne…
Vestiges of your being
Appear on visages of 
A hundred different people;
But none are you, not one 
As green,  as golden.

Hard it is to know no miracle
Will mend, no giddy hope assuage,
The scourge that slowly puts an end
To our valiant green and golden girl.
Memory takes us to days of indolence,
Of innocence, of children lying on a levee,
Deep in lush, green, summer clover --
In sunlight almost as golden
As your hair -- beside a flowing river
Bearing away our golden hours
And the painless green  of youth.
 
Now, in your green room, reclined
In shadow, our golden girl reposes.
Your courage lights the coming night
That does not dim the gold and green
You always shared, and still you share.



Details | Verse | |

Inevitable Bear

Oh lonely Inevitable Bear,
Padding claws, death in white
Sorrow in recurring nightmare
Instinct’s test; fight or flight?

Camouflage against the fence,
A challenge; my subconscious fear
Ominous slowly moving silence,
“Let me in, there’s a bear out here!”


Details | Verse | |

Spirituals and Drums

My ancestors walking in the night
using oil lights and moonlight for guides
while being instructed to Wade in the Water
to camouflage their scents like disguise

The Sweet Chariot awaited 
so they could ride away
Harriet was a soldier
and it wasn't an option to be caught during the day
That's the same mentality Nat Turner had when he sang
Steal Away

They would follow the drinking gourd
so all were in accord to go north
The Gospel Train was coming
and at the end of the journey
was a fine reward
Freedom was coming
and it was a long time coming and
they walked until they heard freedom bells ringing
and I still hear their tired footsteps running

Thinking of My Darling Nelly Gray
Stolen from my arms a random September day
and eliminated our chances to run away together
No family ties, no love, no strength says the oppressor

Then I hear the drums beat in the darkness
giving me the hope of finally being free
Maybe I'll follow them this time on faith
on bended knee
There must be a place for me among the light
of this darkness
Among oppression, thieves, evil-doers
no thought on their conscience

Thank goodness for the safe houses that
supported our traveled distances
and for the conductors who bore witnesses
and may God have mercy on the souls who
were against this
and on those who chose to forget this sh@!

I still hear crying in quilts of safety 
because I know that the burden was heavy
to be at the mercy of nature and patrol men
catching run-away slaves for money
Some did it bare feet with freedom ahead of this
loved induced journey and they made it
So all that bull about how your life is hard
just stuff it in an envelope and save it



Details | Verse | |

Philosophical Poetry Week: Transient Tuesday

I am a misprint,
Ink blot on love,
I remain a maybe
Longing for fact,
No speck of lint,
A hand in glove.
Thunder; a baby
Will only react

When you etch
Parallel clouds,
Whistling on cue
To a dead town.
Dream a sketch
Of silent crowds
Becoming you,
This boiling crown

Chews thought
Into flagellation.
Holes in the walls
To spy through,
Seeking a sort
Of bricked-up sun.
A heaven of halls,
All leaving you.


Details | Lyric | |

How Alone Am I

How Alone Am I
How Sad Am I 
You never Know
I never Show

You Smile WIth A Shine
I Smile with Wine
Your Enthralling Eyes
Defines My Style

Missing you is my life
Yes I live, but I strife
Finding you beneath the stars
Misng You my life chars.


Details | Free verse | |

Bleeded Out

More things can happen or could have happened,
From a cold metal,
Sharpened in fine fettle,
Making skin nettled,
Damaging the mettles,
To keep minds unsettled,
Provoking to ask, if this is or if this was real or mental?

Blade on arms,
Skin might be harmed;
Skin was gashed,
Blade grinding and gnashed,
Red colors coming in a flash...

Blade on gut,
Feeling a sudden jut,
Provoked as a rut,
But, this was a guff...

Blade on neck,
Thinking about a sudden sweep,
Discord trying to overcome conviction and peace,
Even though, the blade failed again,
Failing to provoke the red gushes and streams...

Blade on heart,
Might be the last battle so far,
Trying to not give in, being so hard,
Though in the past, there could have been to many cuts,
And more deadly slashes,
Creating red splashes and plashes,
As I slowly might have fought, winning or losing,
Against the sleeping and life flashing feeling,
As I bleeded out..


Details | Quatrain | |

First

Haunted by your memory,
You're in my thoughts and dreams,
They say you never forget your first,
There's truth to that it seems


Details | Imagism | |

Withered Sentiments

The petals rains on me,
Smothering the blemishes on my skin.
An idyllic red bleeds to a crimson shade,
And my heart feels it once more,
Withered by my sentiments.


In the midst of reds and yellows,
Hands held out in a field of shadows.
Swirling in the echoes of a laughter,
Running away,
Chasing for the scent of a rose.


They said a prayer would stop the pricking,
Should I choose to hold on to a rose.
To embrace a memory made of thorns,
To linger on the pathway of forlorn,
And enjoy the moment of my fall.


But, a piano starts to resound in the heart,
And a tone of darkness blends in with the lies.
Its taunting melody sings of him,
While his memory turned its back on me,
The withering rose starts to cry alone.


What’s left of me is lost in you,
But I can’t find you.


Details | Romanticism | |

To Be Apart

Her smile always greets me
As I close my eyes each night
The love in her voice is comforting
With passion, she's burning so bright

A sparkle in her eyes
And a fire in her heart
Let's spend together our lives
Couldn't stand To Be Apart

To Be Apart would destroy me 
Reduce me to the tears
Without her right beside me
All throughout the years

I don't know what I'd do
If I ever had to restart
And oh how much I'd lose
If we were To Be Apart

The most beautiful girl I'd ever seen
With every desirable too
She was everything to me
When we're apart, oh what will I do?


Details | Haiku | |

Memory Lane

are you feeling down?
strolling down memory lane
may bring happiness


Details | Free verse | |

Last Sonnet



Hither I stand, at crossroads,
And then I gaze, at the yonder end-
The vague horizon from where I began;
And all that I may ever deem
Is that- my days
Have been a waken dream.

Hither I stand, at the edge of my dream;
Then I wonder, at the depth of my trance-
An adventurous journey through the wondrous woods;
An idyllic stroll through the vicissitudinous meadow;
And from the final station as I depart,
All that I can ever say, is that
Perpetuation has been a rouge
Of fleeting phases of my life.


Suyash Saxena 
St. Stephen’s College.


Details | Personification | |

Drawn in Harmony

The phrase "Music to my ears" has been injected toward the 
wrong part of my body, and most unpleasantly personified. 
There is a record player that I let skip and scratch on purpose, hearing 
colorful sound of life back when truth kept us both inside the lines. 
I thought order was helping me draw closer to you, while you began on the next 
page without me. The needle digs it's way into my ape-shaped forearm. 
I'm directed by the guitar string shaped veins 
that only play notes in the keys of D# E# A# F# and the sharp sounds pierce 
my perception to the point I can hardly hear your voice anymore. 

At times, listening to the same old sad song on repeat makes me think
that I am just an old soul getting repeatedly tossed around in God's 
big barrel of human paradox. "Lord what was I made for? Surely it wasn't 
to repeat the mistakes of my forefathers, because I'm certain I am the 
only one you molded with forearms so large, that the record got lost 
and forgot how to spin in circles. Music is all about art, and art all about 
perception. Perception has nothing to do with your eyesight, and 
you use your ears to envision the painting on a blank canvas before picking 
anything else up but sound waves. I drive myself crazy sometimes when 
I think that my inspiration is speeding away from me in the 
opposite lane, but I didn't even ask for directions. Mostly because I'm a man, 
a stubborn one at that, and I always think I know where I'm going. 
But this time, I swear I had gotten the map right. So I transformed my open 
hands into tight fists to make music burst out of my arms, and the needle went 
faster and faster until it broke off, and the high pitched vibration 
disintegrated the steel into my own blood. I blame myself for letting this 
be the first time to let myself draw some air into my body. A surgery of 
scalpels cutting into my physical, and an orchestral symphony of sutures, 
threading my life back together again. My blue blood turns crimson as it kisses the air. 
Why do we associate the color red with life and vibrancy, when it clearly shows that we are letting our own blood run down our arms? Why do so many women where red lipstick; the kind that sticks to your collar, screaming to your wife that you clearly sinned? 
Why do we see sin so clearly; transparent enough for others to correct us before we really we even grasp the desire to fix ourselves? AND WHY IN THE WORLD IS THIS MUSIC PLAYING SO LOUDLY NOW; when my needle broke off into my body a long time ago, and I can hardly hear you anymore.
Good thing my life's song still isn't completely written yet. Let's add a more positive climax to this. One drawn in harmony.


Details | Free verse | |

Photo Album

I keep an old photo album 
on my bottom shelf. 
I get it out every once in a while, 
just to sift the time away 

I keep a lot of pictures 
There inside that book. Some are old and a little 
Yellow now, but still somehow clear. 
Funny hair and clothes. Gigs and weddings, 
funerals and newspaper clips, 
just like time standing still 

Tonight I looked through it again, 
just knowing what I might find. 
Somehow I think my heart 
knew what it was looking for. 
by the time I got halfway through 

As I neared the end 
of this blue memory lane…I saw it again… 
the picture of you and me on our first night together. 
I remember your blue eyes, your beautiful smile…. 
I remembered you….in my heart 

You are, were, and always will be the love of my life, 
The memories came flooding back, 
too fast for words, and too strong to hold. 
I remember God smiling down on us 
As we shared our first night. 

Dear God-how I loved you 
(and still love you) so much 
But now it can’t be…when 
time and pain have driven us apart. 
How did it get this way? 

For minutes that seemed like years, 
I cried my tears on your picture 
And kissed your cheek on that page 
I was trying so hard to keep the pain away. 
But it came unrelenting… 

And I’m afraid there are 
many more tears to cry 
who knows when they’ll come 
My heart is forever yours, captured 
in a snapshot on page 24 

As I lay me down to sleep 
I pray the Lord keeps you safe 
May you feel loved tonight 
even though 
I’m very far away 

I’ll always keep your picture 
And your kiss inside my heart 
I just can’t bear to 
throw away the memory 
Of the love that we’ve lost 

Your picture is still inside 
That album on my shelf 
Sealed by tears, and prayers 
Memories too painful to hold on to, 
and too precious to let go


Details | ABC | |

Grey Bird

On that cloudy weekend in June 
I hear a soft and graceful tune 
from the grey bird on the tree 
branch 
Singing sweet lullabies felt 
blessed in the moment 
My body tingles of joy at sight 
Gazing out through 
my open door,
Letting thoughts fly free
Releasing love out into the horizon 
Heart filled with emotion came 
over me 
Grey bird stood playing its tune 
for awhile and on the wings of 
letting go
Then as the rain fell from the 
sky the grey bird flew away 
gracefully 
I blew a kiss to the clouds and 
utterd these simple words of I 
Love You father ( who's now in 
heaven ) and yet I hope to hear 
that grey bird sing again once 
more for me 
Farewell, love your son

Poem contest for Debbie -referential


Details | Dramatic monologue | |

Crystal Magnificent Morning

Crystal Magnificent Morning

You should see LA 
In the crystal magnificent morning of continuing time. 
It is a magic that has to be seen to be believed, 
And yet, 
So few have truly seen the show. 
The LA sunrise is the unknown movie, 
When the eastern sun slowly rises, 
And with hot rays searing the air like electric swords in battle,
Baking the Big Enchilada, 
Baking those tall high rises 
Like big meatloaves in a garden oven. 
That’s what I see from here in the mornings, 
Here in my Kasbah.
I see all you lost people out there, 
Lost as lambs in the dark pastures, 
I know who you are.
Don’t think I don’t know. 
I know what it’s like to be insanely bored. 
I know what it’s like to be depressed, 
To be sad. 
I know what it’s like to want to die. 
I sit up here all day waiting for my girl to show up, 
And I imagine 
And I think 
And I dream; 
Dream of climbing mountains above the clouds, 
Of getting through Joyce’s Ulysses all the way to the end, 
Of taking Norma Jeane into my arms 
And staring into her sad lost eyes 
And kissing her with excruciating urgency. 
These are, indeed, the dreams of a sad lost man.
Green Onions. That’s the song!
Green Onions was playing on the radio that morning. 
Booker T. was her last lover… 
And not I…
As she reached for the phone.
“Help me, Jack. They’ve killed me!
They have taken my clothes, and my soul.”
Indeed, I know what it’s like to want to die.
“What good is all this?
What good is all this money and fame?
A person works and strives and struggles all their life, 
And what do you get in the end,
When all is said and done?
A funeral.
A 1962 funeral with all the trimmings!
It’s not worth it, Piggy, darling.
It’s just not worth it.
Please hold me in your arms.
I am afraid of the dark.
I am afraid of being alone in the darkness of my grave.
Please Piggy! Don’t let them bury me!
Now kiss me hard.
Now make love to me.
I don’t want to be afraid anymore.”
You should see LA
In the crystal magnificent morning of continuing time.
It is indeed a magic that has to be seen to be believed.
Goodnight Norma Jeane.
Good night America.
It is time for another screaming sunset.


Details | Verse | |

Little One

She took you away
Not one year on this earth
You never learnt to speak
Smiled from birth

A dark stormy night
From then you were no more
In hate you were taken
Our hearts sore

Gone now little one?
And you left us so young
It was not you I know
No life clung

Where are you my boy?
Not yet twelve months old
I know it won't be hell
Pain enfolds

Your life gone 
Before it had begun
Never will we forget
Little one

© 20/05/2013
In memory of my little brother whose life was taken by another's hand.
 
Contest Entry:Melancholy Memory


Details | Enclosed Rhyme | |

The coat that was destroyed

remember to those whom think
Fur from the skin of a animal is a sin

to a degree this is true 
in a previous poem .I also have written "tigers living free "
So I let you know I to am guilty ..
go back in time , I ask you.

Think about women before the day 
The day women wore Fur and it was ok .

my mother died early 
to early for me , I was only the young age of 20.

Through the years I remembered her scent 
she left me with memories, in my heart was kept

I wish not to offend 
so I will try and tread light 

When my Mother died
The next day , her personals were taken  
with many it was almost a fight .

I was left with a plate 
until one day received a call 

From the man she was to marry 
before she passed that Fall 

He told me how sad it was for him to see 
his beautiful Brides room was torn up side down
looking for items of value to be found 

He said there was one thing the Vultures forgot 
Her mink coat she loved so much and she wanted me to have 


He flew from  Julian to Monterey , all in one day 
last year I came into my room to pull the coat out 

Mom's coat would comfort and warm my children at night 
someone entered my room to destroy this coat we loved , out of judgment, it was cut . probably a small fortune it will cost , all because of some ones hate , I lost.

I ask we be kind in thinking next time a fur coat
maybe it is the only thing left one has to remember  
maybe it is there to warm the broken soul that longs for 
Motherly Love ~


Details | Verse | |

I STILL REMEMBER

I still remember, when I and you,
Went up on the trees
Climbed up on the mountains
Flunked the garden flowers
And were happy to tease girls
There were impossibles
But we made them possible
You tried to teach me English
But I was stubborn
I never concentrated

I still remember when I and you,
Were ones who felt proud of each other
We never thought for others
But made ourselves smile
We loved our seasons
We got joy and fun
We would play in the sun
On a lovely day of sun
We had lost our lovely pairs
On the bench of the beach

I still remember when I and you,
Went far and wide
We shouted and cried
We ate chips and fries
We wished to go up skies
To catch the twinkling stars
We went faraway places
To do well our graces
There were girls who put together sand
And they made some houses
We were the ones who razed the all

I still remember when I and you,
Sprinted here and there
We went coves to search some stones
And we collected them in order to play
We were always known as dumpy
We came home when it was dusky
There was so much fun
When we were in school life
We were the ones who shouted in classes
We were the ones who faced mistakes
We were the ones who bore exams

I still remember when I and you were the true best friends,
I am wondering where you are now
On a shining night, and sparkling stars
I looked for you, but you are lost
Somewhere in the sky, near some stars
You can’t be seen, but in my heart…


Details | Rhyme | |

Too much times past

Inspiration is just so hard to come by
But I though i 'd found something
That would last
But I guess to much
Times past 
and I never really
Knew my dad
But t ain't something 
Cry over
Cause in just a few years 
............. ( it 'll all be over )
I'm tired of your  lies
I guess to best we severed all ties
But this ain't bout you 
It's bout me 
Even though you
Ruined everything
The damages are to big to repair
So I guess its better to 
Act like you don't care
But 2 can play those games 
It's not like I ever needed you here 


Details | Lyric | |

Mask

I got too much emotion, too much pain.
I try to stay strong to keep myself sane.
I put on a mask with a fake smile and lie,
I'm wearing a "stay strong" disguise.
Pent up aggression, pent up sorrow,
How do i make it and see tomorrow?
I have so many secrets and burdens,
they're under the surface and hidden.
I dont know what to do anymore,
I dont know what to believe.
i cant live this battle this war,
this self hatred.... these lies I've made for me.
Pent up aggression, pent up sorrow,
How do i make it and see tomorrow?
I have so many secrets and burdens,
they're under the surface and hidden.
My whole world just spins round and round.
I put it behind me, but it comes back and bites me.
I'm fallin down,yet my past just haunts me.
Memories are burned in my head,
I dont want to remember this,... again.
I got too much emotion, too much pain.
I try to stay strong to keep myself sane.
I put on a mask with a fake smile and lie,
I'm wearing a "stay strong" disguise.
I dont know what to do anymore,
I dont know what to believe.
i cant live this battle this war,
this self hatred.... these lies I've made for me.


Details | I do not know? | |

celsius

Fallen snow will remind of me/ it is snowing ... 
Slowly as in the dream/ 
Boy word-beads/ with signs on his spine/ 
He kisses fine/ 
Your eyelids /

And it snows ... It snows /so slow/
It does/ and you're thinking of me/ 
'Coz it's warm/ it's better to stay in warmth/ 
Waiting for summer dim/ 
It is snowing/ slowly like in the dream/ 
Flakes/ go round/ playing the music theme/ 
You've been looking for rescue/ 
You searched in wine/ 
But it's in me/ 
all the rescues are mine/ 
It is snowing/ the snow is fluffy and white/ 
If you see darkness/ I'm deaf and blind/ 
there's the cast of time/ on the arm/ 
But I discern the light/ 
Dreams/ upon your eyelids tips/ 
Prepare you for winter drowse/ 
And it snows/ 

Fallen snow/ will remind of spring /
it will crumble and crackle in vain/ 
It will snow / fluffy /white/ and slow/ 
And you'll become whole/


Details | Blank verse | |

Replacing Sadness

REPLACING SADNESS

Sadness plays on the melodies of life
like broken strings on a violin. 
We feel the discord and it shakes our being,
a trembling reaction to scratchy notes. 

Try to remember the in between sounds 
when sweet melodies lightened your heart 
pleasant memories taken from a time gone by
and sealed within a deeper consciousness
to be be used and reused like a worn out pair
of comfortable slippers.

CAK 5-20-2013


Details | Acrostic | |

Rest InPeace Regan

Rest in peace my charming friend; lo your body is now asleep but you spirit remains with us always. With our constant lively action, everything seems much more still without you here, but we shall remember and cherish you as you were-fun loving and full of life. You lit up the world around you just a little bit more with your perky attitude and bright smile.
Evening twinkles a little bit brighter with a newly gained star. A special one-of-a-kind treasure with your light of burning passion smiling down upon us as you await our arrival
Softly we hum to your memory; as we blissfully play back in our minds all the times we had with you.
Time was cruel, taking you at early twenty-one years, but we took what we could-what we were given and made the best of everything we had. Cherishing every moment and enjoying you and your hilarious antics

Invaluable you were to everyone who met you and knew you. You were an amazing person and wonderful friend who always stood by everyone’s side and helped those who needed it. Knowing how full of life you always were, it’s hard to believe that you are now parted from this life. I still see you with that glorious smile upon your face filling your eyes with a deviously mischievous twinkle…
Never did I imagine I’d be having to say my final farewell so soon; the way you were burns in my mind as I whisper my love and goodbyes to you one last time...

P
E
A
C
E

Rest in sweet peace my dear friend; never will you ever be forgotten- Forever engrained in our minds your legacy will continue one for years to come…
Early morning reality strikes its cold, hard chord as sudden sadness as despair finally sinks in… you have been removed from this broken world where we mourn your loss; the pain hitting each person deeper than the one previous
Goodbye my adventurous dream, the spark of memories hold together the shattering pieces of my cracked heart that sorrow threatens to crush in the grips of its mighty claws tightly surrounding my aching, bleeding heart…
Angels rejoice as they gather you in hugs and welcome your coming, leading you to your place beside our lord, residing with him as you patiently await the rest of us to join you
Nostalgically I smile and watch as you fade into my dreams; I will never forget you my friend, remember me as we wait to see each other once more…

----
R.I.P
Regan Steel; friend, brother, and more...
October 28, 1991- July 15, 2013


Details | Free verse | |

Flat Canvas

Flat canvas;

Bubbling brown ridges strike 
The confining dimensions in a hostile yawn: 
Upwards, Outwards.

Walk the world no longer, an ending beckons, 
A precipice builds moments where swallows wager wings 
On new seed: New breeds.
Falling buys the assurance of seconds
From a sinking well. 
Oh well.

Remember us when the globe begins to slip,
Bang drums for our pity:
Our crescendos mean less than meaningless.
And then, when spheres crack, continue 
On the whorl of a thumb, 
Stretching hope to nothing.
Run.


Details | I do not know? | |

My Love

my love...

my love blossoms amidst the thunder

across the oceans and the beyond the seas

my love reaches out and touches

the moments of bliss as the loneliness flees

my love is simple
with profound feelings of yearning desire

my love rages within
the furnace of this aching heart's unquenchable fire

my love basks in the warmth of the knowledge

that in the spring it takes root and it will flower

my love breathes in the light fragrance

of her hair after her warm and delicate shower

my love remembers drowning in her eyes

of those ethereal moments frozen forever more

my love recalls the fleeting ticking of the clock

each minute apart stabbing at my very core

my love she knows I need her so

for she needs me just as much

my love she sprinkles light flourishes of her sensual touch

as my love for her continues to ceaselessly grow

my love reaches down into the crevasses of my of being

my love for her is held onto deep inside

for in the coming of the cold ache of seperation

my love settles between the folds of her heart, for 'tis there that my love for will reside

my love like an eternal dream caresses me in wakefulness and in sleep

and that is the feeling that I shall cherish

a feeling of love that has settled in me 

a feeling so pure and a feeling so very deep...


Details | Free verse | |

Skin Deep

Achilles' heel 
You’re another day older
The world’s much colder
She…

It’s not your fault
They were taken 
Don’t blame yourself 
for God’s mistake
Is…

Her beauty reflects your own
Her life reflects your future
Chasing rabbits will get you there faster
Loss of faith will bring you there faster
Watching…

The ball drops
It’s clever to see
What happens to us
And here we are
Waiting…

Yes, 
Take the evil out of this
You’re stronger
She’s stronger and always,
Loving…


Details | I do not know? | |

REST IN PEACE MUM ANN BROWN 18 AUG 2011

MUM ...

WHERE DO I START? I DON'T THINK THERE IS WORDS , TO EXPLAIN HOW I AM 


FEELING ABOUT THE LOSS OF YOU... BUT I WILL USE ALL THE STRENGTH YOU HAVE 


GIVEN TO ME , SO I CAN GET THESE FINAL WORDS OUT THE GUILT , SADNESS AND 

REGRET  FROM NOT SEEING YOU LIKE I WANTED TO  SO ****ING MUCH ,

 THEN THE PAIN OF NOT HAVING  A CHANCE TO SAY "GOODBYE" TO THE MOST 

BEAUTIFUL MOTHER COULD WANT, AND YES MUM I'M TALKING ABOUT YOUTO HOLD 

YOUR HAND, TO SEE YOU SMILE , TO HEAR YOUR VOICE, WOULD MAKE MY LIFE MORE 

WORTHWHILE. YOU TAUGHT ME HOW TO LIVE, BUT YOU NEVER TAUGHT ME HOW TO 

LIVE WITHOUT YOU I MISS YOU SO SO MUCH MUM, BUT THE LOVE IN MY HEART FOR YOU , WILL MAKE SURE 

YOUR LIFE , LOVE , WARMTH AND TOUCH , WILL LIVE ON FOREVER , 

IN ME I KNOW THAT YOU CHANGED ME , JUST FROM YOUR 

PRESENCE...THATS'S HOW STRONG YOU WERE MUM I KNOW YOU HAVEN'T LEFT ME , 

FOR THE LOVE IN MY HEART REMAINS , YOU WILL NEVER HAVE TO SUFFER AND YOUR 

BODY WILL FEEL NO PAIN...... GOD TOOK YOUR HAND , AND MADE US PART , HE CLOSED 

YOUR EYES , AND BROKE MY HEART ....FOR ALL THE TIMES WE HAVE BEEN TOGETHER,

I WILL NEVER FORGET YOUR FACE.

THERE IS NO MOTHER ANYWHERE LIKE YOU,

NO ONE COULD TAKE YOUR PLACE.

IF ONLY I HAD KNOWN YOU WERE LEAVING,

I GUESS I EXPECTED YOU TO FOREVER LAST,

ALL OF THE DREAMS OF US IN THE FUTURE,

ARE NOW BUT MEMORIES OF THE PAST.

GOD TAPPED YOU ON THE SHOULDER,

HE WAS THE ONLY ONE WHO KNEW,

THAT YOU WERE GOING WITH HIM,

TO THE SKY SO BEAUTIFUL BLUE.

ALTHOUGH I MAY NEVER SEE YOU MUM,

ARJAY WILL BE BY YOUR SIDE,

HE'S GONNA HOLD YOUR HAND,

AND LEAD THE WAY,

FOR HE WILL BE YOUR GUIDE.....

I LOVE YOU MY MOTHER.....
DON'T TELL ME THAT YOU UNDERSTAND, 
DON'T TELL ME THAT YOU KNOW,
DON'T TELL ME THAT I WILL SURVIVE,
HOW I WILL SURELY GROW.
DON'T TELL ME THIS IS JUST A TEST,
THAT I AM TRULY BLESSED,
THAT I AM CHOSEN FOR THIS TASK,
APART FROM ALL THE REST.
DON'T COME AT ME WITH  ANSWERS THAT CAN ONLY COME FROM ME,
DON'T TELL ME HOW MY GRIEF WILL PASS,
THAT I WILL SOON BE FREE.
DON'T STAND IN PIOUS JUDGMENT OF THE BONDS I MUST UNTIE,
DON'T TELL ME HOW TO SUFFER,
DON'T TELL ME HOW TO CRY.
MY LIFE IS FILLED WITH SELFISHNESS,
MY PAIN IS ALL I SEE,
BUT I  NEED YOU,
I NEED YOU YOUR LOVE UNCONDITONALLY.
ACCEPCT ME IN MY UPS AND DOWNS,
I NEED SOMEONE TO SHARE,
JUST TO HOLD MY HAND AND LET ME CRY,
AND SAY, MY FRIEND I REALLY DO CARE
Mom you mean the world to me
It’s hard to live without you ,You were always by my side
Through thick and thin you helped me


Details | Verse | |

I blame me

I blame me for all my mistakes
I blame me for all the rejection and heartache
I blame me for all the times I stayed silent 
and should have started and earthquake
with my words
I should have spoken up when I had the chance
now all those thoughts are wasted
unspoken, unheard

I blame me when my husband touches me 
and I feel the hands of a predators pounce
And I blame me when the pressure it on
because all I had to do was shout out and renounce His name
Lord, help me to get rid of the shame

I blame me for my loneliness
I blame me for my feelings of lust
I blame me when I look at myself and see absolute disgust
I blame me when I shut down - unsure of who to trust
At times not even sure if I really know how to love

I blame me when my kids are crying out sick
because when I brought them here
I knew that this world was unfit
Yet overpowered by my love for them 
I became more and more protective
So I blame myself in advance for their sadness
when they finally see that the world is not objective

I blame me for those nights I can't rest
Wondering if my consciousness has finally realized
that I have done my best
to stay positive and have good intentions
So I blame myself when I give in to temptations and my human inhibitions
and begin to feel ashamed of myself
I begin to feel like I don't have enough strength to love myself
because
good things don't happen for me
So I blame me for my thinking and feelings of worthlessness

It's a big world and my lonely soul has no more confidence
I have nothing
I have given up 
and so I blame me for my incompetence and my soul's rut


Details | Rhyme | |

Flawless Wish

Written by D. W. Breidenthal 


You take my breath away

I wanna stay in this entrancing paradise
I want all of the negativity to fade away 
The darkness isn’t my property…I despise
Living a life that’s filled with misperception and disaster 

I would love to live in the ocean’s ecstasy 
That would be spectacular if we can abide in the sparkly sea

This eccentric dilemma makes your angelic features too unclear 
It chills me to the bone…
My heart pounds with hope and fear… when will peace draw near
This flawless wish remains unknown

The night’s approaching…seek shelter and light
Painstaking regrets – I can’t back away from gravity’s pull 
Hand me the rope and don’t bestow your burdens upon my soul 
Sift away the misfortune and allow me to put up with the fight
Help me fulfill my flawless wish
And I’ll strip away your anguish

You’re a burning candle
I raise my head up from the mud
I step forward with courage that I couldn’t handle 
On my own, but you stripped away the agony 
Watch us grow and sprout as one flower bud!

You took my heart to a wonderful place
I wanna desert this decaying body of mine and seek you in splendid light
You forgave me for my wrongs…you thrilled me with praise 
I wanna embrace the dawn’s incredible, appealing light...
Sweeping away the deploring night  

It soothes my sensitive heart…dismissing my vexing misery  

I have the urge to repaint the breathtaking memories I’ve spent with you
Will it scratch away the sorrow?
I have to search for shelter and burn away our calamity – slaying us with rue
 
Will my flawless wish store hope for tomorrow? 


Details | Free verse | |

To a love ill never let go of, sorry

you whispered sweet doubts into my ears
but i was so blind to acknowledge the fears
ill never regret how i felt for you 
but you seem so far gone, i don't know what to do

i only did what i thought was right
but i guess i lost all fear and extinguished the light

Bay, i wish i never left 
but its to late to take it back

Bay, i wish i had some sort of sign
to know your OK

i have this horrible habit of making a mess of things
you might think it funny
but i jump when the phone rings

i hope you dont blame me for what happened 
but then again it must have been my fault
im sorry

i guess all those times i apologized were in advance
for the heartbreak that i probably brought down upon you
bay, im sorry, im sorry, im sorry if you ever read this
you'll finally understand the way i still feel about you 

nobody ever said it was easy 
but nobody ever said i would fall this hard

i miss you 

im sorry
im sorry 
im sorry 
im sorry
im sorry

please bay, im sorry 
please bay 



Details | Rhyme | |

In A Hotel Room

Why did they go? They always go,
Whether they saw me I simply don’t know,
They’re here for a night and then go away,
And leave me behind, all alone I must stay,
And wait for the loved ones to whom I belong,
But I’ve been waiting now for ever so long,
I’m starting to think that they’ll never return,
But I remember those faces so full of concern,
On the day that I fell into the old hotel pool,
I never did master swimming at school,
But somehow I pulled myself out from the deep,
And came back to this room where my parents did sleep,
My Mother’s blue eyes had turned red with her tears,
Just as any mother’s whose child disappears,
I don’t understand why they just didn’t see,
That I was standing there just where I should be,
Then they were gone, leaving me here in this room,
Sometimes full of life, sometimes cold as the tomb,
Why did they go? They always go.


Details | Ballade | |

Broken String

It’s the same pattern all over, the same way.
The same story all night again and again.
Her song went on and looped but never strays, 
nothing ever changed and she kept singing in vain.  
Strummed the notes, through her fears and pain,
smiles and tears, a languished memory they’d bring. 
Sorrows were hidden, happiness she’d feign
and the incomplete melody played with no more but a broken string. 

He stabbed her heart once again, after that day 
life was taken away and so was her sane. 
Begged for mercy one last time, she stopped and prayed.
Filled one single glass with a whole bottle of champagne
the familiar moans through days she’d maintain.
Attempts she took trying to mend the wedding ring
but all that were left were pieces she disdained
and the incomplete melody played with no more but a broken string.

Other songs joined in along but faded away. 
Alone again the cries had once been restrained. 
Solid tears, trapped in her eyes will soon decay. 
It’s this same song to him she’d once entertain, 
and this damaged guitar she threw but detained.
As the blood trickled down her lips but her heart that sting. 
She endured the pain, in hope that something will break the chain
and the incomplete melody played with no more but a broken string.

Strumming the notes, through her fears and pain
smiles and tears, a languishing memory they brings 
Sorrows are hidden, happiness she feigns
and the incomplete melody plays with no more but a broken string. 


Details | I do not know? | |

Good Morning, Apocalypse Now : A Tribute to a Vietnam Veteran

Untitled 5
(My Uncle: Good Morning, Apocalypse Now)

My uncle doesn't speak much
about Vietnam or the stuff
he witnessed when he 
was just a boy. See,
he likes to drive the back roads fast 
and honk at random cars that pass.
His friendly gestures always lead to how
he grew up compared to kids now. 

Jumping and racing trains on the tracks
became dodging bullets and carrying his buddy on his back.
The marshes and dirt valleys here
became the forests and trenches of the military frontier. 

Last year, my sister donned his jacket
a fatigued fatigue that hung in his closet. 
In color and memory darkened,
kept out of sight for fear it would harken
the PTSD he's stuggled to avoid. 

He saw his brothers, young like him
to Vietnam succumb
while on American soil
and he promised he would never speak,
for fear his stomach would coil, 
when remembering rice - a dish he no longer enjoys.
And there's no orange on his clothes to remind him of the agent that destroyed.

When he speaks a calm 
"Good morning", I wonder if he's thinking of Vietnam
or if he knows
that I admire his strength and 
bravery and how 
he continually fights against 
the "Apocalypse Now".


Details | Prose Poetry | |

I Hope You Know I'll Always Love You

I am what you call a hopeless 
romantic,
But im also a lost lovers cause, my 
heart belongs to another
Yet in my head a love triangle starts 
to form, the girl I love doesn’t love 
me
She holds the heart to another and 
mine caged to the floor,
She isn’t afraid to fight for what she 
wants, not even when it comes to 
leaving another man torn
Trust me she’s happy, as that boy 
holds her heart ever so close
Seeing what I shouldn’t I smile as I 
wear my blind fold,
Blind to everything around, lifeless 
staring into air
My train of thought running so fast, 
the second I stop you’ll hear a crash
Derailing my hope, for ever finding a 
love so pure & rare
Wishing I could hold the hand of the 
lover who stole my flame,
Wish I could change the last days in 
which we parted ways,
Realizing now that we can never be 
the same
Finally saying it out loud as tears run 
down my face
You stole my happiness, as I walked 
away that day
But it’s because as of what you said 
I guessed I changed,
Now every relationship has just be 
the same,
No one can seem to bring back that 
flame,
Because a love likes ours comes 
once in a lifetime
Well at least it does to me,
But I mean you’re happy with who 
your with 
I mean I only wrote this as I heard 
exchanging “I love you” flow from 
each of your lips.


Details | Free verse | |

on a field trip freshman year

on a field trip freshman year
the boy
in special classes walked 
up the muddy trail.
he
walked on the side,
balancing on the dry stones
aligning the path.
he followed some
acquaintances.
an old coat and
sweatpants with worn elastic
warmed his bones in the gray
mists. bus pass in his pocket
and a few coins, he thought
about lunch - not the rocks he
would have to climb.
his shaven head chilled with drips
from the pines above, the path 
narrowed and inclined 
between two boulders. 
he struggled up the path,
getting dirt on his 
snow white shoes.


Details | Senryu | |

The Kids of Divorce

Mom and Dad divorce; the kids are damaged for life; but some are relieved.


Details | Rhyme | |

Wine painted lips

Wine painted lips
Lips the sun had kissed
Left a black mark 
Later became a scar.
It didn’t spoil her beauty
I did what I did this was my duty.
She was my dream
She became my wife, my moonbeam.
We broke many hearts
Not to be apart.
I showed her the way
Just for her to stay.
We drove million miles
Together we smiled.
She is there and I am here
This I didn’t plan
We ended up in tears.


Details | Free verse | |

Scars of an Inner Child

You are not the man, you want to be
You said you were my Father, till, I discovered different
Enduring, daily beatings
Bashing the living day lights, out of a woman and a child
Repetitive, bad ass attitude, nasty streak
Mean and aggressive!
Fists, knives and guns, your weapons of chose
Out of control, abusive, devious
Relentless, over – bearing!
Breaking me, piece by piece
Confusing a child, with unhealthy love
Hand fed your bullshit, brain washed
Using me as your human, punching bag
This innocent child’s blood, staining your callas hands
My child’s curiosity, asking you one day
“Why do you hurt me and Mum?”
Your retort: “I am not your blood!”
I didn't understand, back then
Now, as an adult, I clearly understand!
Believe me, when I say
There was never a day that went past
That you didn't remind me of that!
My freedom, restrained
My sanity, tested
Caged, like a wild bird in captivity
Behind bars, looking out
 Here, I am today, free from your grip
Nursing, this inner child’s, bleeding love


Details | Free verse | |

Bullets rain tears

Young and innocent they went to school
 Expecting to learn and play
 Never in anyones wildest of dreams
 Did we expect that day
 For a rain of tears to shell them
 From one lost deep to sin
 But heavenly hosts came down for them
 Releasing them from him
 The devil he did have his day
 But God in end dost win
 For noubt will be lost but these young lives
 Will not be gone in vain
 The laws of the land will change in ways
 For it must not happen again
 
Those who reign must stand on this
 Take stance and make a difference
 No one should be able to take a life
 With intent nor mindless innocence
 For even when with madmans mind
 You cannot be left to mingle
 How can you be able to walk in shop
 Purchase guns and not be liable
 Actions speak far louder than words
 And if we let just one slip through
 Without accounting for their sin
 It might well be me or you
 
For on anyone these bullets
 Might be named to fall upon
 So make a difference – make a change
 Add your name – petition
 The whole wide world mourns in shame
 An Amnesty is long past needed
 Write your letters – use your vote
 Act now while it is fresh
 And pray for the souls of all those lost
 That each by the Lord be blessed
 Also for those who’ve lived through this
 That they might find a way
 To find the strength and courage
 To step out further each day


Details | Free verse | |

Das Ein Mannlein


Das Ein Männlein

The silent echo reflects through the lodge,
Ein Männlein Steht im Wlade ganz Still und Stum…
Repeating itself in the young boys head.
He is not yet a man, but stands proud enough to be,
Coming back here to relieve himself of his past.
Crying out as he reaches the splintering and tilted door.
The memories of the cold, the blistering cold overpower him.
He spends time collecting himself as the moon moves across the sky.

He had been here with his family-
Says the toppled dining room table.
He also wasn’t the only child in the lodge-
Says the curled up paper dolls in the fireplace.
There was music- Ein Männlein Steht im Wlade ganz Still und Stumm…
Echoes the toppled ivory-keyed piano in the corner.
There was a war, as the Russian Graffiti on the wall complains.
The crashed bomber-plane with the seat full of bones assures that fact.

He came back to the rotting lodge in the forest
Back to the overgrown pile of shambles to find something
As he digs he picks objects out of the rubble, a boar’s head, jewelry, dog-tags,
And finally the thing he seemed to have been searching for.
A baby’s bathtub, with a scrolled handle, stares at him through the dust.
What happened to the other child?
She still has all of her baby teeth in her sweet little baby head.
She’s been sitting in that bathtub ever since that horrible night.
When she was boiled to death by hungry war criminals. 


Details | Free verse | |

A Blue Boy's Death Wish

A fragile mind breaks 
Wake upon the rock laden shores
A muffled heart begs to echo
Whispers lost among a velvet chamber

Dusk comes premature time and again
Dropping the curtain on an optimistic sunrise
If you never witness dawn
There is no tomorrow

Always the dreamer aches
Never awake to make real what he desires
The restless corpse walks blind
Dead ends seem fitting for one of the kind

Lost in the labyrinth of strangling vines
Love is the motive and the weapon
Taking root in throats dry from weeping
Sprouts of amnesia in place of smiles
A garden called heartbreak holds onlookers captive
The comfort takes hold, sets in the bones weary of searching
A plea for rest lands on deaf ears

The hollow boy tires of himself
The last request he will ever make
"End me"
Lost and tired
He wishes to be weak no more


Details | Free verse | |

The Rat Race

As a child, I had much to do
Crushed it, when I tried to grew
Participant of the Rat Race, I am
Suddenly everything was scattered away

Now when I try to think of you
And calculate what went wrong
Where was my mind that day?
Why everything went so wrong?

After endless struggle, when I dream
Those equations , cry and scream
My demand curve went wrong way
And that was the end of everything 

The sweet little Tom & Jerry
still playing with no worries
Then my mind cries and says
those days are so far away

Every-time when I think of it
I think as I'm a liar and cheat
After this endless bargaining 
Life ends here.... Screaming


Details | I do not know? | |

You and I



You and I.


You.

Your heart blazed,
with a warmth of spirit,

soothing,

alluring,

soaked in truth.



Your smile burned,
branding me permanently,

gentle,

tender,

enveloping my being.



Your love was complete,
from the depths of your soul,

unsaid,

yet fierce,

bathed in silent knowing.



Your dreams were poetic,
fluttering in the afternoon breeze,
infused with the distilled essence of rhyme.


I.

I squandered your generosity of spirit.

I vainly discarded your priceless poems.


Now I stand,

alone,

empty,

desolate,

wasting away,

rotting inside, day by day.




Details | Rhyme | |

Nuthin' Else To Do

It was a Tuesday night and dull boredom had set in
‘ thought I heard my ol’ car say: “Take us for a spin!
Go pickup Bobby Mac and maybe Cindy too,
‘Cause it’s Tuesday night … and there’s nothin’ else to do”.

Bobby Mac rode “shotgun” with Cindy in between
While I gripped that steerin’ wheel, and drove through Abilene
We stopped ’n got some soft drinks an’ an order of French fries
Then off we sped again - crusin’ ‘neath those Texas skies

Cindy’s eyes were sparklin’ when Bobby told a joke
Once I had to stop the car, ( ‘cause I had spilt my Coke!)
Then Bobby Mac, he asked me: “Just what can this car do …
Can it reach a hundred … or maybe go on through?”

I turned around and cruised on down to Ol’ Comanche Road.
I was rev’in’ up my engine, while the duel exhausts bellowed 
I popped the clutch - tires protested with their clouds of smoke
Horsepower erupted through every bore and stroke

The needle on the dashboard gauge was approaching one-oh-oh
And then I felt that right front tire when it decided to “let go”
It happened in a heartbeat, but slow motions’ what I see
For now I’ll relive that awful night for all eternity.

And Cindy has no sparkle left within her big brown eyes
And Bobby Mac’s no jokes to tell ‘neath those Texas skies
While I sit here on this cloud with Bob and Cindy Lou
… Now and forever more … they’ll be Nothin’ Else to Do. 

Don’t speed.


Details | Shape | |

Memory

knock me to the ground show me your way
of good love my memory of it is cold,sour,bitter
and not right
 tears are very unpleasant
hands are so numb face is scary to look
at bring that sweet memory of real good
soft lovelyness
back into my world I lost some
memory of that teaste mouth 
watery 


fun times but 
I-black out and I only can 
remember the
bad times



Details | Dramatic Verse (Verse Drama) | |

Emotional Hole

I did not find myself to be so important
So I ask my friends do I seem distant?
When I ask the question I had received an answer, Yes
So I think that made it clear that I had been not the best
I am a friend of a friend that talks so many things
That friend talks to much it is insane and insanity it brings
I do care, about my friends they are all good people
They tend to stand on their high steeple 
Today I find myself not so aware
Disbanding my fear of regret and care
Walking many different paths I see that I have found holes
It is the path that people choose to use to fuel their rage with coals
Coals are partially burnt wood or fossils a piece of fuel
It is the source of burden and fire a rage of emotions that stands cruel
It can be warm and caring, but it also can be baring
I just start to feel so low, below the ground I keep on staring
I reach for my friends so many times I feel so ignorant at times
Just once I feel I should not rely on them when feeling I can not find 
I dig my hole deeper and I can not climb out
For some reason I am just full of doubt
I care about so many things and what I have is confusion
One person should be all I should think about to get out of that illusion
My battle in my heart and mind is not at all so pleasant
I feel so alone in an island that is shaped like a crescent
My emotions is like coinciding with a diameter of the semicircle
Not a full emotion that is complete like a circle
My feelings is circular full of incomplete thoughts, so much deeper
I feel it will wake up my evil half a evil soul that is a sleeper
What question should I ask myself? to believe that I am not so alone
As I feel like a person who is deteriorating to the bone
I ask my friends the same question once again
I figure I should do it, to know what kind of feelings I should end
So many thoughts that come out of my feeling
I feel like my friends take, an emotional trauma of stealing
They ask me questions and I answer theirs
But when I need mine answered I feel burning inside like a flare
Are they even friends when they do not take me serious in anyway
Just put me in my hole cause I feel nothing in their will be getting in my way
It's just so simple to answer someones problem
I answer friends with beauty of a rose, but when they answer mine I get the stem
I know the stem is very important in life, with out it how can a rose be a rose
With a hole to put the root and stem in how can it grow
The words we speak I guess is like all natural things we reap and sow


Details | I do not know? | |

A Simple Wish

a simple wish...

no fancy words
no more clever rhymes
no more slickly crafted verse

just a simple wish
to cherish the moments
in-between the hue and cry of this life

no more the dull-edged jab
no more the anger and the strife

a simple wish
beyond the wasted hours and the days and the blurry fears

a simple wish
of a simpler life

after all the bitterness of the passing years

and so

to retire from the hustle
to flee from the hollow wasted breaths that have been breathed

to bid the emptiness farewell

while

ushering in the new tomorrow

bathed in the soft glow of hope

and kissing adieu to all the hurt and all the doleful sorrow...


Details | Cowboy | |

NIGHTMARES & WHISKEY

In a room stark & white 
A nightmare he will ride tonight 
Twisted sheets in a rider's grip 
as he settles in for that fateful trip 
silently he screams & shouts 
This time there'll be no turn out 
The final clash of beast & man 
In the mind's arena plays out again 
Once was a time he was among the best 
Until that Brahma stepped on his chest 
Now he's locked in a ride he can't quit 
as his wife & his family at his bedside sit 
How he longs to be up & out of this bed 
Away from the demons in his head 
But you can't drown a nightmare in morphine 
And every night he rigs up again 

In a room stark & white 
She'll replay the ride tonight 
"Just one more ride & I'm done 
I've got to help raise our son" 
He'd said as he climbed in the chute 
and straddled that Brahma brute 
With a nod & a prayer, he marked out 
His last would be his best, no doubt 
Then, with a sudden twist & a flash of horn 
The cowboy from his seat was torn 
She watched him fall & struggle to rise 
Numb to the crowd's horrified cries 
Now she sits here each night without rest 
Cradling their baby boy close to her chest 
How she longs to have him hold her near 
Later, she reaches for the bottle to chase the fear 
But you can't drown a nightmare in whiskey 
And every night she rigs up again 

Under the arena's bright lights 
He'll dance with a nightmare tonight 
Wearing a greasepaint smile to hide the pain 
He plays out that fateful ride again 
One step out of rhythm & rhyme 
He'd lost the race against Brahma & time 
Word's haunt him still of a Cowboy's last request 
After that Brahma had stomped on his chest "Tell Katie I love her & I'm sorry for this" 
"If I'd listened to her, I'd not be in this mess" 
"You & the boys take care of her & my son" 
"I hear the chopper landing, guess this ride is done" 
How he wishes he could run that race once more 
The memory pushes him hard, it won't be ignored 
But you can't mask a nightmare with greasepaint 
And every night he rigs up again 

A wild Bullrider, loved one or clown 
no matter the poison the memory won't drown 
Nightmares, whiskey, greasepaint or morphine 
Can't kill the demons that ride through your dreams


Details | Lyric | |

A man called Bob

A man called Bob

I met a man some years ago
A man with so much soul
He was a Maori warrior
And he seemed so very whole
We used to play Guitar together
And we’d talk of mystic things
Whenever I think of my friend Bob
Such sadness does this bring.

Bob he was a ‘one off’ man
He stood there all alone
Most folk they just worshipped him
For never was he known
To hurt someone in anyway
With mouth or foolish act
He was a total ‘gentle man’
With courage, style and tact.

Old Bob, he taught me how to live
Though I’m not there quite yet
He died of cancer of the brain
And I will not forget
How I watched his essence leave his shell
On that day so long ago
Now in, my deepest vastest depths
A part of him does glow.

27 July 2013@0440hrs.



Details | Rhyme | |

The Weeping

And so begins the weeping,
The weeping that comes in waves;
Waves that crash in evening tide
To begin the sorrows fade.
And yet in sorrow I sit,
Melancholy under night;
Night whose air reminds me still
That remembrance is the light.
And who shall be the teller,
The meter for this old song?
Sung in whispers meant for none,
Save for those who may belong.
On air and breeze cries carry,
Yet alone they reach the sea.
And I endure their telling 
As the waves crash over me.

C.L.Baker©2013


Details | I do not know? | |

I Stand, Alone



I stand, alone.

Scratching for my truths,
peeling away the veneer,

I stand, alone, before this
impregnable cliff so sheer.

Cocooned in my solitary shell,
wrenching a smile from a tear,

I stand, alone, a little odd,
and definitely quite queer.

I stand, alone.


Details | ABC | |

Sometimes I Like To Pretend Things Never Came To A End

Sometimes I like to pretend, things never came to a end. But over time, our love became a crime. I didn't know what we had, would ever end so bad. But then I knew things weren't right, when we started to fight. Now I walk down memory lane all the time, the pain is worst then committing a crime. We only caused eachother pain, but we were eachothers maine. I thought things would be alright, but I cried alot that night. I don't want things to change, without you my life is strange. You said you wanted me so much it started to hurt that you couldn't wait, now im just another person you hate. When you said you didn't care, I knew the person I loved was no longer there. You aren't the same, the new you is lame. We both fell, now it's hell. You use to always be here for me, like family. But now your nowhere in sight, things aren't right. Empty is all that I can feel, I still can't believe this is real. I didn't mean to let you get away, I didn't know what to say. Am i with the right guy, or am i telling myself a lie. I was afraid to loose what we had, but to you that choice was bad.


Details | I do not know? | |

REST IN PEACE MUM ANN BROWN 18 AUG 2011

MUM ...

WHERE DO I START? I DON'T THINK THERE IS WORDS , TO EXPLAIN HOW I AM 


FEELING ABOUT THE LOSS OF YOU... BUT I WILL USE ALL THE STRENGTH YOU HAVE 


GIVEN TO ME , SO I CAN GET THESE FINAL WORDS OUT THE GUILT , SADNESS AND 

REGRET  FROM NOT SEEING YOU LIKE I WANTED TO  SO ****ING MUCH ,

 THEN THE PAIN OF NOT HAVING  A CHANCE TO SAY "GOODBYE" TO THE MOST 

BEAUTIFUL MOTHER COULD WANT, AND YES MUM I'M TALKING ABOUT YOUTO HOLD 

YOUR HAND, TO SEE YOU SMILE , TO HEAR YOUR VOICE, WOULD MAKE MY LIFE MORE 

WORTHWHILE. YOU TAUGHT ME HOW TO LIVE, BUT YOU NEVER TAUGHT ME HOW TO 

LIVE WITHOUT YOU I MISS YOU SO SO MUCH MUM, BUT THE LOVE IN MY HEART FOR YOU , WILL MAKE SURE 

YOUR LIFE , LOVE , WARMTH AND TOUCH , WILL LIVE ON FOREVER , 

IN ME I KNOW THAT YOU CHANGED ME , JUST FROM YOUR 

PRESENCE...THATS'S HOW STRONG YOU WERE MUM I KNOW YOU HAVEN'T LEFT ME , 

FOR THE LOVE IN MY HEART REMAINS , YOU WILL NEVER HAVE TO SUFFER AND YOUR 

BODY WILL FEEL NO PAIN...... GOD TOOK YOUR HAND , AND MADE US PART , HE CLOSED 

YOUR EYES , AND BROKE MY HEART ....FOR ALL THE TIMES WE HAVE BEEN TOGETHER,

I WILL NEVER FORGET YOUR FACE.

THERE IS NO MOTHER ANYWHERE LIKE YOU,

NO ONE COULD TAKE YOUR PLACE.

IF ONLY I HAD KNOWN YOU WERE LEAVING,

I GUESS I EXPECTED YOU TO FOREVER LAST,

ALL OF THE DREAMS OF US IN THE FUTURE,

ARE NOW BUT MEMORIES OF THE PAST.

GOD TAPPED YOU ON THE SHOULDER,

HE WAS THE ONLY ONE WHO KNEW,

THAT YOU WERE GOING WITH HIM,

TO THE SKY SO BEAUTIFUL BLUE.

ALTHOUGH I MAY NEVER SEE YOU MUM,

ARJAY WILL BE BY YOUR SIDE,

HE'S GONNA HOLD YOUR HAND,

AND LEAD THE WAY,

FOR HE WILL BE YOUR GUIDE.....

I LOVE YOU MY MOTHER.....
DON'T TELL ME THAT YOU UNDERSTAND, 
DON'T TELL ME THAT YOU KNOW,
DON'T TELL ME THAT I WILL SURVIVE,
HOW I WILL SURELY GROW.
DON'T TELL ME THIS IS JUST A TEST,
THAT I AM TRULY BLESSED,
THAT I AM CHOSEN FOR THIS TASK,
APART FROM ALL THE REST.
DON'T COME AT ME WITH  ANSWERS THAT CAN ONLY COME FROM ME,
DON'T TELL ME HOW MY GRIEF WILL PASS,
THAT I WILL SOON BE FREE.
DON'T STAND IN PIOUS JUDGMENT OF THE BONDS I MUST UNTIE,
DON'T TELL ME HOW TO SUFFER,
DON'T TELL ME HOW TO CRY.
MY LIFE IS FILLED WITH SELFISHNESS,
MY PAIN IS ALL I SEE,
BUT I  NEED YOU,
I NEED YOU YOUR LOVE UNCONDITONALLY.
ACCEPCT ME IN MY UPS AND DOWNS,
I NEED SOMEONE TO SHARE,
JUST TO HOLD MY HAND AND LET ME CRY,
AND SAY, MY FRIEND I REALLY DO CARE
Mom you mean the world to me
It’s hard to live without you ,You were always by my side
Through thick and thin you helped me


Details | Ballade | |

Coronation blues

Coronation Blues

Now I was just a little boy
In nineteen fifty two
{I think that was the year it was
It’s close, I’m telling you}
King George had died a while ago
And the good Princess was set
To wear the blessed crown of England
This day, I’ll not forget.

It was a damp, cold dismal day
In that grey old London town
I recall that there was drizzle too
And Lord, it really got me down.
I’m sitting there on my dads shoulders
I’m just on nine years old
And I didn’t care about no British Queen
For I felt much too cold.

So when I think of royalty
It don’t give me no glee.
It takes me back to London town
And all that misery.
Waiting for this foolishness
{Well, it bored me close to tears}
And still, that pomp, and old tradition
To me be not too dear.

23 July 2004


Details | Free verse | |

a tear

a tear i shed is more than enough. ennough to say, no shout "IM SAD" 
enough to scream "IM MORE THAN MAD" 
and i hate to cry. especialy in public. 
it draws attention and that's not me. so when i cry i pray that nobody sees.
 i'll fold my hands over my eyes curled up in a ball and to noones supprise,
 ill be surrounded by the pond ive made , 
covered with smeared mascre, smeared down my wet cheeks,
 with a box of tissues by my side 
and a memory in my mind, 
ill cry to say one last time 
for this is the beginning of my fight.


Details | I do not know? | |

ONE DAY ON HOLLYWOOD BEACH

     ONE DAY ON HOLLYWOOD BEACH
My destination's inner space.
Erasing things not meant to chase.
I'm holding dreams of you, but then,
when I must die, I'll live again.

You were the bait. Your daddy laughed.
Six hundred smiles and I was trapped.
Your photographs got tired of me,
but I still love each one I see.

There was a day I couldn't swim.
I drowned a while, my hope was slim.
At football games as I recall
I drowned one day in early Fall.

My tears are hidden in the sea,
mistakes I made were constantly.
Not being more than how I seem,
The day I died it killed a dream.

I've loved you on the beach down here,
It's Hollywood, in Floridear.
From Canada come all the lame
To live part of my sunshine game.

As seagulls dipped, I saw a girl
her name I cannot breath nor slur,
an rv killed her in her head,
she looks out windows like she's dead.

Now I must cry for her again,
And then I'll cry for you, my friend.
if life has anything to lose,
I'll lose it twice, so what's the use?
© ron Wilson aka Vee Bdosa the Doylestown Poet


Details | Free verse | |

The Black Abyss

Sinking in deeper,
No way to escape,
The dark and scary Reaper,
Fore told in the Book of Life.

Is this my end?
Will I ever see the light of day again?
No. My wounds, I must mend.
I must find my strength.

Stand my ground,
Face my fears.
Only then will my voice be found
I must survive.

Break the suffocating chains,
Run from the darkness.
Power will fill my veins.
I will Fight!

Fight the painful names,
The horrid memories,
The demented games 
And escape My Black Abyss.


Details | Lyric | |

The Saddest Song I've Ever Heard

The Saddest Song
(I’ve Ever Heard)

No guitar no drums
No melody to be heard
Just the beat of my heart 
Thud thud thud
Harder & harder
As the fear gets stronger
What is a girl to do when the one she loves the most?
Is also the one she fears the most
Saying no won’t help
He will do it anyway
With his manhood 
With a knife or sometimes even a candle
The pain is more than I can bear 
Yet I have to stay strong 
He won’t stand for tears
So inside I cry
As I listen to the sound of 

The Saddest Song
(I’ve Ever Heard)

I wanted so bad to tell 
I wanted to make it all stop
Yet I was afraid of losing the one person 
Who loved me the most
I didn’t want anyone to take him away
So I suffered in silence
I did my best to hide the pain
And the music played on for 

The Saddest Song 
(I’ve Ever Heard)

With a mother who didn’t seem to care
All I had was my dad 
Yet he was the one who couldn’t control his 
Desires 
He was the one hurting me more & more
When it wasn’t him 
It was his friends who paid to have a piece of the action
So I just retreated inside myself
So I didn’t have to feel the pain
Tried to block it out
Pretend I was someone else 
Watching from a distance 
Yet the pain still didn’t go away
And the tears never stopped falling
Inside of me
I felt so all alone 
Listening to the sound of 

The Saddest Song
(I’ve Ever Heard)

He passed away 
I pushed the pain away
Locked it in a box in a space deep inside 
Forgot it all until recently
Then the music started to play
And the memories came rushing back
The holes in my childhood are filling in
And for each new memory 
A tear forms in my eyes 
And no matter how hard I try
I can’t keep them from falling
Down my face 
As I realize 

The Saddest Song
(I’ve Ever Heard)

Is the story of my life 
& 
It I hadn’t remembered 
It may have never been heard


Details | I do not know? | |

Distant African Nights

Those Distant African Nights...


1.


The shadows swayed in your candlelit room,

a cool breeze teasing your bare back,


streaks of lightning forked in the Johannesburg night,

as my hands stroked your hair,

kissing your soft mouth,

holding you,

ever so tight.



2.


You whispered that you loved me,

and I kept silent,


the rain fell, 
shadows danced,
thunder rolled,

the breeze teased your naked back,

you whispered that you loved me,
as my lips found yours,

the rain washed over our tender nights,


lightning and candlelight,

etching poems on your burnished skin,


yet,

a fear gnawed at me,

deep within.



3.


We parted ways,
and you could never forgive me, you said,


now, after numberless thunderstorms,

the rain that falls,


echo the countless tears that I have shed.



4.


You are long gone,

far away,

happy, I pray,


yet the memories persist,

those precious moments shall never, 
ever,

like the Jo'burg rains,
trickle away,

and I wish you well,
for loving me as you did,

for it was I who was not worthy,


then,


and it is I who is not worthy,


now...



5.


You were always true,


it was I who always,

always,

refused to,


to give myself,


completely to you.






Details | I do not know? | |

Without You



Without you,

worn down, weary,
staggering into tomorrow,
dissolving my todays, grim, dreary,

I crawl, slipping out of my skin,
flinging laughter, joy, contentment,
into the gaping abyss of life's dustbin.

Without you


Details | Lyric | |

Song of the Raped Virgin

Yet…
Life shows you pain before the smiles
Even though youth has cried for innocence:
Outside the soul one bleeds and hides,
Inside the flesh one dies of nonsense.
When turning pages you see humble hopes:
The book of your life is already ended,
The sea you paint is without boats,
The land you plant is thoroughly cursed.
O, that you wish,
Steps away from you are!
The garden you live in is a grave where to be burned;
And dark shades in your eyes made the night of no star-
To fade out is a grace for those scars you have earned!
And perish all alone…
Like the fresh air in the cold,
Like an old tree the day of thirst,
Or a martyr when to burst…
That shame of your birth must be the same when to hold-
Those lies you tell:
As you are not only the first…


Details | Free verse | |

Memories Made

The coldest white had fell
Surrounding all the feet of those behind
The day turned into hours
Just in the mind
Did the gift appear in night?
Or were dreams reality?
Did it come from karma’s hands?
It drifts from sanity

The trek towards that happy place
You’ve been there many times
Something was different now
It held a horrible surprise
The box wasn’t full of life and sound
The ashes of memories made were here
Taking longer to twist the knife
Left remains of a child now in tears

Standing still you couldn’t breath
Excuses flying in your mind
Trying to figure out the scene
Hoping there’s time
You look up to see
Expectant eyes for the last time
You wish you could keep
But it’s the saddest of a smile 


Details | I do not know? | |

A Chipped Heart

A Chipped Heart...


Dreaming, my heart brittle as glass,
my solitary facade a pitiful farce,

shards tearing out of my skin,
seeking release, from cages within,

I am lost, in the dream,
bellowing out a silent scream,

torn from reality, drowning in the now,
yet I refuse,
I refuse to succumb,

I refuse to bow.



My chipped heart, may be wounded,
wreathed in pain,

still,

I believe, love, truth, belonging,

will take my hand,

again...


Details | Verse | |

Melancholy Memory

Her charming beauty
Upon my naked soul.
Threaded deep- sighted through
Her, no fault.

Our friendship- a bond
Our heart couldn’t resist.
Her soul, my soul, soon one
But not long.

Love we nurtured for
Three harvests, perished too
Soon- A signal that I
Am mortal.

The night of her death
Called me insane lover,
Who reared uncertainty,
Tears can’t wake.

Her caring, no more,
But her spirit lives on.
The words and love we shared
Stays amok.

Melancholy form of poetry (5/6/6/3 per line of five stanza) is adopted in this poem. The trailblazer of the form is Constance La France.

17/5/2013

For: Constance La France's "Melancholy Contest" 


Details | I do not know? | |

To deal with the pain

To deal with the pain
I?ve retrained my mind 
Every time I have a memory of you
Every time I have a dream about you at night

I will visualize a red button that says delete
Just like when you press play and record at the same time
I will erase your memory from my mind
From every kiss to every hug to every I love you

I will take a demagnetizer and erase any patterns of emotion,
Compassion or desire that transpired
Like a tape that holds our song
It will be erased and forgotten

Your image will be burnt and carried away 
Like the ashes into the wind
You will be a stranger on the street
That I do not recognize

No connection, no emotion, no hello, no goodbye
No gesture, no smile
You name will have no meaning
And your eyes will have no sparkle

Everything that I have known about you 
Will simply have died
Like a grave without a name or date
There will be nothing left to remind me that I once loved you


Details | ABC | |

I Can't Believe It's Really Over This Time

I really hate this feeling, sometimes I wish I could stop breathing. I don't wanna try, just leave me here to die. You were the thing that made my life living for, but your no longer mine anymore. I feel so much pain, sometimes I believe I'm going insane. I'm missing what we had, although it was bad. I'm always walking down memory lane, why can't you see my pain? I know people change, &&' things get strange. I guess I gotta face it, she's my new replacment. I can't believe it's really over this time, I feel as if i have commited a crime. I live in a world of sorrow, so I don't ever worry about tomorrow. I didn't even have time to cry, because i had already said bye. I feel like I'm digging a deeper whole, so I'm hoping Jesus will take control. I'm sorry for my dumb mistake, but baby now I'm wide awake.


Details | ABC | |

Feeling Down

I'm feeling down, &&' I'm already on the ground. I cant get any lower, my patience is getting slower. I've already hit the floor, &&' I'm becoming sore. I'm not sure where I went wrong, but now I dont belong. I'm like the unknown, all alone. This feeling is unbarable, the pain is unbelievable. I'm ready to walk out the door, I can't take no more. This is why I don't trust, I always get pushed in the dust. Now I got to cover my eyes, &&' ignore all your lies. I've been left in the rain, I've felt the pain. I knew things were wrong, but I stayed along. Now I'm here all alone, waiting for the sound of my phone. I wouldn't wish for my worst enemy to feel this way, that's what I have to say. I didn't really have a choice, now I'm missing the sound of your voice. I made mistakes that wont fade, not even with a blade. My heart isn't bullet proof, &&' that's the truth.


Details | I do not know? | |

boungiorno

hello! hey! boungiorno! what is the date?/
this world of dimensions created duality/
no letters/ no words/ are enough to express/
someone like you/ in reality/

i filled all your emptines/ MY still quiet bay/
as Jhon opened world in his Yoko/
you searched perfect princes/ looked for "right him"/
now at only one overman looking/

i swear/ i will hold you/ as much as i can/
would become all the axes/ and outer space/
voice is speared by the screaming wind/
falling down/ flakes to your place/

going crazy just seeing your knees/
don't regret anything/ my Benito/
unbelievable/ perfect/ unbearable/
you whisper/ "la comedia e finita"//


Details | Lyric | |

Jus A Dream

If my dad can see me now 
He would have a smile on his face
He would say look at my son
Growing up into the man you see today
He would take you through my life story
From frame to frame
And how I was poor and homeless
To making more than minimum wage
He would pick up my babies
Kiss and hug his granddaughters
Whisper to my wife and say
Im glad he made a decision that was smarter
Eat dinner and afterwards
Watch my girls’ eye blinks get longer
Help me put them in bed stand next to me and say
Today we’re both proud fathers
Sometimes I sit back and think
What it would be like if he was here standing next to me
We would get a beer of the frigerator
He would tell me im his best recipe
The wind blows hard and fast
And I noticed no longer was he next to me
The pain hit me like a kick
Then I realized it was just a dream


Details | I do not know? | |

The Last Time Censored and Incomplete

For the third time he’s got her, he’s trying to get it in;
She’s saying no, but whatever… he just won’t listen.
“Stop, Get the f--- off me! Don’t touch me… NO!”
She’s fighting, she’s glaring, but he isn't letting go.
People walking by, glimpse, looks away;
Pleading with her eyes, still no one stays…
From that moment she realized nobody cares,
Because when she needed someone, no one was there.

He’s groping her everywhere; her petite frame is crushed-
Between his body and a wall... the opposite of plush;
She’s in uniform; and inspection is in an hour,
Whining as he abuses her, draining all of her power…
There’s an opening, she strikes… she tries to run;
He grabs her by her hair, throws her around, he isn't done.
Feeling every jab in her back gritting against the wall,
And every time he draws back with his hand curled into a ball…

She now fears that anytime she strikes, he’ll strike back,
And it seems that manners are something that he unfortunately lacks.
So she stops hitting, she just pushes and blocks,
But he’s so d--- big! Like a boulder, a rock…
Hold in your tears; don’t let him see you cry,
Playing over through her mind like a lullaby.
 
She keeps on her face disgust and anger as he violates her everywhere;
Hoping for a hero, in the parking lot, past the cars…she just stares. 
It’s over, he walks her to class and she’s in a daze;
Feeling so exposed, angry, and ashamed...
...
..
.


Details | Free verse | |

Reflections of Love

I need to heal and fast,
I can feel the time running out, all too soon.
But can't push myself out of the agony,
The threads of pain pull me back like a puppet.
 
I seem wrong to be grieving now, odd one!
Everybody else is no longer black,
Me, haven’t seen the sunlight for long;
The mansion, its corridors, the rooms  now my world.
 
The wound in my heart is still too fresh,
It forbids me from a sunset on the beach,
It forbids me from running or skipping,
It forbids me from laughter and joy...
 
In denial: they say but it's not all true, I accept
I know he is dead, He is no more
But do I dump him in my past and move on?
The thought makes me hate myself!
 
He would want you to smile again, live further..
Strangers tell me his likes and wants, the know-it-alls.
I look straight ahead and avoid their prying eyes
It’s a losing battle, I know but let me lose in grace...
 
Visitors keep pouring in, with flowers and tears.
He was a man loved by many, the crowd proves it,
Everybody seems shocked and pale but not as lost as me
I glide along the windows, reliving the shadow of memories...
 
The moments were many, uncountable even,
It crushes my soul to think, they are all I have,
I see his fingerprints on the window panes,
I search for mine too, just beside him they lay...
 
The garden is being watered, but by a strange hand
The plants understand the master is now below them, 
He will never enjoy their colors or drive away moths
His ashes and scent scattered around the mango tree..
 
I smile at the garden then burst out laughing,
Before I know, warm tears run down my nose
But there still lingers a smile, wet with glistening tears
I am happy he lived, he lived full and more...


Details | Rhyme | |

Confession

I have a depressing confession for my peers
There is someone I have trouble forgetting
Even though it has been years
I still think of him often, imagining his touch
Although I have never felt it 
I've always wondered so much
What would it have been like to feel him 
To know his lips upon mine
For him to actually love me
For me to be on his mind
He was a good old friend but I wanted so much more
He has been gone a very long time
But that doesn't mean he's not adored
I can't stop thinking of him and the life we could have had
I don't mean to sound ungrateful
For the time we had I am glad
I just wanted to be with him, still do that's the confession
We have not spoken in ten years
But he has left the biggest impression
In my life and on me, for him I cannot forget
His face, his voice, the secrets he told
To be with him, I am all set
I am terrified he is gone now forever
And I will never get my chance
To tell him the truth of my feelings
And see if his love he grants
So I go on day to day
Thinking and dreaming of him
And I might until I'm gray
My chances of seeing him slim


Details | I do not know? | |

Within Me


Within Me

Flowing through the rivulets of my everyday thoughts,
memories of you surface, gasping for air, breathing in,
permeating, absorbed by the pores of my ageing skin.

Famished, greedily gulping mouthfuls of fractured life,
awash in distant yesteryear, when your feathery kisses,
banished the vacuum, dispelling my anguish and strife.

You are eternally carved, and embroidered into my soul,
I wash ashore, smashing against the boulders of the now,
seeking solace, begging for absolution with my empty bowl.

The book of fate is sealed shut, the tea-leaves have been read,
nothing remains within me, the burden of smiling has been shed.

Now I am stranded, between dreams and the empty years ahead,
searching for forgiveness, in the miles I have yet to wearily tread.



Details | Dramatic Verse (Verse Drama) | |

Finally

 There was a wonderful change in my life today,
A sense of  something good comming my way.
     It's been a long time comming and  it's feeling right ,
I know this because I was able to sleep last nihgt.
     Loving you has always been so easy  for me ,
Holding on to you was  very different you see.
     Finally the clouds and stormy skies have cleared,
We can see it clearly now that it is so near.
     For years we have struggled  with this love we shared,
Only recently have the two of us become so aware.
     Of what we truly feel for each other these days,
Leaving no doubts it was meant to be this way.
     I love her more now then I ever have before ,
To think I was about to walk out that door.
     She loves me I can feel her much closer now ,
The happiness I feel makes me scream aloud.
     Telling everyone I have a wonderful thing,
The love of my Queen who has made me her King.
     We will live our lives making all the memories ,
This love I have for you and  you have for me.
TAC  


Details | Rhyme | |

Her Handsome Man

She sits alone crying,
playing with the ring upon her hand;
The services are over
in memory of her handsome man.

Words to say to comfort her
I am at a lost to find;
As she contemplates her future
who knows what it is on her mind.

It was only five short years ago
that I walked her down the aisle;
A more beautiful face I’ve never seen,
glowing with that smile.

He stood there proud and nervous
looking gallant in his tux;
By marrying our daughter,
he would be joining us.

Together they both joined as one,
a pairing we approved;
Even though our only daughter,
away from us would move.

Wishes for a long and healthy life together
were given on that day;
Too bad that they weren’t heard on high,
for his health would start to fade.

She nursed him through that final year
as we watched her from the side;
We shared her grief and sorrow
when too young he upped and died.

She now sits alone crying,
playing with the ring upon her hand;
The services are over
in memory of her handsome man.


Details | I do not know? | |

Parallel Lines

I am lost, and broken,

trapped alone,
in a foggy crevasse,

wedged between sanity | madness | anguish.


I lose, and break,

memories taunting,
my waking thoughts,

stripping me bare | naked | exposed.


I survive, barely breathing,

slipping deeper,
into nothingness,

feeling little | shattered | numb.

I am incomplete, without you,

broken and fatigued,

gnawed by emptiness | desolation | pain.


I persist, each breath futile,

crushed, yet alive,
comforted knowing only,

that you breathe | you live | and you love.




Details | I do not know? | |

Port of Call

Port of Call


Barefoot on a talcum beach,

alone, not lonely,

with the breath of the ocean a caressing balm,
soothing pained memories away,
to the swaying of a solitary palm.


Barefoot on a talcum beach,

alone, not lonely,

feeling the brushing away of all past turmoil,
on a quest for solace, ever so hard to find,
yet comforted by the crashing of the waves,
as the tide cleanses all pain,
and leaves despair far, far behind.


Barefoot on a talcum beach,

alone, not lonely,

drenched in a sea-breeze of mist,
that hushes the ache of bygone moons,
tasting the salty tang on my lips,
as the burnished sun,
over the distant horizon,
swoons,

and dips.


Barefoot on a talcum beach,

alone, not lonely,

searching, ever searching,
for a slice of solitude,
as memory bids a final adieu,
reaching under the sea so vast,
and seeking comfort in the depths,
while embracing,
the tomorrows to come,
wishing that they be true.


Barefoot on a talcum beach,

alone, not lonely,

seeing my truths drown,
as they slip beneath the turquoise waters,

feeling my heart ablaze,
with a passion that rarely falters.


Barefoot on a talcum beach,

alone, not lonely,

yet knowing that I am home at long last,
wishing the waves would wash away,
the defences that once stood,
like an impregnable wall.


Barefoot on a talcum beach,

alone, not lonely,

I have found, at long last,

my final port of call.


Details | Blank verse | |

Self

I look at her and weep.
She didn't know the pain ahead
and I do, but can say nothing.
Her happiness is fragile and fleeting,
her hope resting in it completely.
Oh, how she will break soon.
her sun extinguished and dead.
And so I wonder at the one
who looks at me right now.
She knows my future and
knows if my new hope will die,
just like the one I look at.
Will I break again one day?


Details | I do not know? | |

Abuse

Trapped. No where to hide.You scream at me through the door.Though your words still 
sting me.
I sit on the ground alone.Blood drips down like tears. tears run down like rain.The room's 
spinning.  My heart bursts out of my clothes.We got into a fight.  Why is unclear.
I tried to leave.  You hit me. I fell.I started to cry.  You kicked me.A sharp pain burst out of 
my chest.  I could not breath. I have little energy,I kicked you.  You fell. I ran to our 
bedroom.
I am trapped.  No where to hide.I'm weak. I stumble to your Night stand.I see a gun.You 
break down the door.  I grab the gun.You start to choke me, squeezing my throat like you 
were trying to get some sort of juice out of me.
I pull the trigger.
BANG!Trapped.  No where to hide.Your grip feels looser.   Your face in pain.
You fall down. i fall into darkness.Free.  No need to hide.


Details | Free verse | |

Faith Healer

The odor is intolerable
Like a foul beast clinging to the end 
I can barely subdue its subterfuge 
But here I am, 
I’m standing here of sound and mind
Waiting for the time that answers my own questions

Can it race with the fires of Orc?
Doubtful, but it can jog steadily can’t it?
The weather is awful, filled with sounds
Penetrating a document not written
It pains me to fight through the night
Not because it’s dark, but because I am just a shadow.

Lester drives but
Motional lasts forever
Still driving
Still crying
And slowly dying as time waves on
Like oceans that can’t be seen.

Nobody cares and everyone listens
Ironic, like a bible that holds lies and deception
Can its will be pierced?
Can freedom stay free?
Is it worth it to stay hooked when everyone around
Seeks liberty?


Details | I do not know? | |

Remember

Do you remember how I spent every day pushing you away?
Do you remember how you used to open up to me forever and a day?
Do you remember how when we talked on the phone you wouldn’t say my name?
It was ‘Hey Beautiful?’ ‘Hey babyyyy?’ ‘Hey love?’ ‘I thought it was lame…

But do you remember how you made me talk to you almost every single day?
And do you remember how you constantly tried to make everything ok?
Or do you remember how you wouldn’t allow me to run you away?
So do you remember all of those nights where I would cry but never say?

I remember how you told me that I reminded you of your battered ex
I remember how you first told me that you loved me… not through text.
I remember how you woke up in the middle of the night and told me about your dream... nightmare?
You thought that I was asleep but no,  I was listening…I remember how you were unaware.

Can you remember how I was always terribly afraid to tell you things?
Can you remember how I cried? Laughed? Or the way I sing?
Can you remember how I you always accused me of playing you silly? 
Can you remember how I let you talk to my favorite little cuties?

I bet you don't remember how I waited for you so…
I bet you don't remember when I told you I loved you though…
I bet you don't remember when you said this wasn't gonna hurt
I bet you don’t remember that this is why I was constantly on alert…

I know you wouldn’t remember how I cried every night for two and a half weeks
I know you wouldn’t remember how I wrote you unsent letters…. Not with ink.
I know you wouldn’t remember how I pretended you never made me happy…
And I know you can’t remember how much it hurt… when you didn’t fight for me….

I expected it though so it’s okay… I promise… it’s alright.
I was steadily seeking out the day that you would be snatched up out of my life.
I don't really care so you can go and play with your little girlfriends... just go.
You didn't fight for me so don't come back now... stay out there in the cold.

Don't come back to me trying to say I forgot about you...
Because you're the one who left me so don't act like this is all new.
You think those unanswered texts and ignored calls are my fault?
Don't PUT IT ON ME when you're the one who should have fought.

But who chose not to...?
Edmond that was you.
You said you wanted to be my rock...
Boy please... You was all about that talk.

Telling me this... telling me that.
I'm so stupid I believed you'd react...
The way that you said you would...
and...
You didn't.


Details | Verse | |

Cry because they are born

Yeah. Another soul gone, taken out of the world
Mothers cry for your boys and girls
Not because they're taken away,, 
But because they're born in a world like today,,
R.I.P G.James,, R.I.P


Details | Ballad | |

STILL PAOLO

Watching outside the glass window
Water filling-up our garden 's meadow
When the rain and wind begun to splash
I closed my eyes reminiscing our past.

Let's start reviewing before the seven calendars
Turn the pages back of the classic memoir
When you reach the first part, let's sit and start
Never leave, never skip let the pages show it's part.

Two characters in their sweet beginning
Their story in climax foretells heartbreaking
Ending - the witness of my lonely love story
The untold feelings remain in one's memory.

I'll let the storyteller reveals the secrets
For I don't have the courage to unseal what i feel
Hear the storyteller in this poem
Hear the heartbeat before I'll move on.


Details | Rhyme | |

Send Me No Questions That Force Me To Lie

Send Me No Questions That Force Me To Lie

Long ago our cherished love flew far, far away
 why I truly and simply can not ever say
Could it have been my crushing , too caring Love
 stifling the wings of my precious turtle dove?

Perhaps time just ate our passion on stale bread!
 others cleverly stole our lonely loves instead
Or moonlight withheld it's glorious bright beams
 fate destroyed it ALL in ever darkened schemes

Our Spirits simply and desperately fell apart
 our apples fell smashingly out of Love's precious cart!
Stories told falsely on both our very busy nights
 lies born to set us to fiercely scold, argue and fight

Send me NO questions that force me to lie!
 love so lost we couldn't restart even if we try
cannons fired with too many lonely empty shells
 sweet paradise turned into dark , evil little hells

Send me no questions that force me to lie
 love ran screaming from us and I know not Why!

Robert L. 06-05-2014

Inspired by a previous write I did recently(Send Me No Insults When I Die) and based 
upon my real life and tragic loss of my 'first true love',
a loss that almost killed me! The divorce from my first wife.
Love thus killed dies a very hard , agonizing and terrible death...
Thirty eight years later and it still leaves a deep cut!


Details | Verse | |

Let me break

Make me forget about this,
How beautifully I was falling,
Convince me it was my mistake,
There was always no one to rely on,
And no one to fight for.

Look into my eyes again,
Speak your lies, and
Die in it.

Make me forget your face,
Your standing there with no move,
Make me forget about you,
The poor illusion,
The wall that doesn't speak,
The life without breath.
Let me break.

Don't ask me to explain.
In darkness I do stand again but
This is my zone, my home.
This is my strength.

Let me break.
Let me forget about you.


Details | Verse | |

Lost in a Memory


" Lost in a Memory"
Written by: Rodney Riggins

Can't forget I hate to concentrate
got to remember before it's to late.
Mind in a brainstorm hear sirens and 
loud alarms to paranoid to stay calm
my memory is lost and gone.

Lost in a brainstorm lost in a memory
brains all gone lost in a cemetery. The 
world has raped me making me hate me
my mind has escaped me still it's a memory.
Violence I crave for death makes me crave
more love sex I'm a man whore a dog on
all fours

My mind is shot to hell my memory fails
as well my energy go to hell my thinking
now is dead. Trapped in a lost brain which
drives me insane the pain i with stain from
thinking now it's drained

Kill me quick kill me fast mind is dead not
gonna last pull the plug I'm leaving fast if
not I'll kill you then I'll laugh.

My memory has failed me I'm my own
enemy death is my only friend life 
wasn't meant for me. Memory is gone
forever pain will be eternity for those
who read this poem hope they can learn
from me.


Details | Free verse | |

Deadly Valentine

These red flames of the burning sun, 
remind me of my everlasting hell.

My skin melts and falls rotten, 
like spoiled fruits that grow old.

Tormented daily by thoughts of you, 
like fire its burning inside my soul.

You move slowly in my head, 
making my dead brain itch.

I feel pain in every limb, 
pins and needles poke me.

I am unable even to smile; 
my muscles have stopped obeying me.

If this pain goes on, I will go numb, 
because my senses are slowly dying.

My blood boils with my impossible desires, 
of seeing your beautiful face again.

I have lost my ability to dream, 
through all my sleepless nights.

I cry for you night and day, 
my tear drops have turned to blood.

Everything around me has died out, 
plants have turned black, and music has turned into silence.

All colors have faded away, 
just like the leaves of autumn.

And like my skin has become rigid, 
my soul has become weak and hollow.

My heart wrapped by razor wire, 
I know soon enough it will stop.

Hammers beating through my chest, 
even my lungs have abandoned me.

What is life if not with you; 
an empty shell lost in the sea.

I wish if you were here with me, 
without you my heart stops to beat.

And all my memory has been erased, 
except of the day that you left.

And there’s not enough roses I can collect, 
to sweeten the smell of your grave.

My sweet love, oh my sweet remorse, 
we were supposed to go together.

But I am condemned to live, 
with the memory of your death.

And every February 14th, 
your image like knives stabs my heart.

Misery has already taken my life, 
so what is the point of my existence.

Today is when I take my life, 
as a memory of our deadly valentine.


Details | I do not know? | |

A Hollow Shell

a hollow shell
of tangled synapses
sparked into gradual madness
which drowns out the truths of the day
as the mind reeks of the rotten sad moments
that swirl in the rancid soup of forgotten dreams
dreams that once traced a gentle path of innocence
dreams that reached for pure love’s tender touch
dreams now paralysed but once vivaciously alive
what became of those fresh dreams and hopes
as they lie mustily on dusty bookshelves
torn into shreds by time’s fine scimitar
devoid of the touch of raw passion
when all that remains of love is
a hollow shell


Details | I do not know? | |

Not On Your Own

Not once in my life have I ever been so low,
   So confused and lost not knowing which way to go.
Trying to pick up the pieces of a wreckage I left behind,
   I often wonder if I have completely lost my mind.
Everything I try no matter how simple it may be,
   Miserably failing seems all that there is for me.
Hoping and praying that soon things will come my way,
   How I have longed for this to happen , soon someday.
Stay postive and be confident that's all I ever hear,
   These struggles I go through has been this way for years.
I feel like a piece of old railroad track tossed to the side,
    Only to spend all my time watching my life pass me by.
Please I would ask could you lend a friend a hand,
    So confused , tired and I just don't  understand.
I'm the missing pieces to a puzzle the pocket with no change,
    Can't figure anything out and things just aren't the same.
Help me to my feet and show the right direction to me,
    If you do this I know I'll get it right this time you'll see.
It doesn't take much to make a man fall down ,
    Much more to get him up when there's nobody around.
There is somerhing I've learn trying to do it all alone,
    Without any help my friend you can't do it on your own.
TAC 


Details | I do not know? | |

Do You Remember

Do you remember?
The nights that were ours
And the morning sun
On our faces.

Do you remember?
When you held me close,
The words you whispered
So no one else could hear.

Somehow I can't
Seem to forget, doesn't 
Matter how hard I try,
The ghost of memories still haunts.

You used to love me,
Would look straight in my eyes
And tell me so but now
You won't even speak.

Everything reminds
Me of you and the time we once
Shared long ago yet not
Long at all.

I remember the way
Your smile lit up when you saw
Me walk towards you, the
Happiness I thought you felt too.

When we were intertwined
And no one else mattered,
It was just us and we felt like
We could lie there forever.

Do you remember?
The way it felt on our first
Date, the light kisses we
Shared in the bright sunlight.

Do you remember?
Because I do, all the time,
But I guess that's life, no matter
How we may wish it were different...


Details | Free verse | |

True Reality

Why is it
I am always wrong?
Something
I have always done?
Why is it
I am 
Never good enough
In your eyes
In challenging times?

How many times
Do I have to say
“I love You?”
What will it take
To convince
That mind 
And 
Heart 
Of yours?

What can I say
That will ease 
This jealousy
And 
Resentment
You feel towards me
When drinking 
Too much booze
Killing what brain cells
Are left
In that stubborn 
Head of yours!

How long 
Will it take
For you 
To believe in me?
For I know
I am a fool 
Staying here, with you!
Feeling desperate
Lost and lonely
Dreams squashed
Emotionally drained
When ‘we’ need to pull together
In union ship
To make 
This bond strong
Between us!

'Uniting as One’'

'Love Conquering All'

“Well!”
“So, I am told!”

I love you more
Than this
Arguing and fighting!
But 
You refuse to understand
The love I have for you

My head 
Tells me to stay with you
But
My heart knows
I cannot!
For
I have asked you 
To be kind to me
I have asked
You to open up 

Your anger and rage
Continues growing
Out of control
Taking over
Like
Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde 
Burning bridges
Being ruthless
Always
Out for the kill!

I need to break away!
I need to clear my head!
I need to experience
Love and longevity
True togetherness
With 
The one’s I love!
My heart needs to experience
‘Healthy Love’
My heart deserves the best!
You now
Belong in my past
I am no longer the person
You once knew me, to be

Your insecurities
Your inner demons 
Far bigger
Than any of the love
You choose to acknowledge 
Or 
Feel from me!

You can believe this 
To be true
If nothing else!

“Love thy self”

Share
Without personal gain
Being 
Your Primary Motive!
Know Love 
Be Love, in Action!

Be honest
Have empathy now
As
I cut these cords
Of emotional bondage
That 
Bind us together 
True Love 
No longer 
Our foundation!

I stand on my own
Knowing
I have learnt the lessons
You have come to teach
I now know
What love isn't!
“I thank you”
For showing me this!

My illusions of love
Blinding me
Colouring my experiences
Revealing
Only what 
'I Wanted Us To Be'
Not
‘True Reality’


Details | Haiku | |

past memories


                                         past memories sad
                                     sit on me like a big toad
                                    croak all through the night













              past memories: haiku: copyright©Rajat Kanti Chakrabarty 2014


Details | Free verse | |

Less Than A Day

The touch of your whispers has blown through the air
And the wave of summer disappears in the sand
There’s nothing to stop these memories are gone
Let the playbook now rest for the feelings they’ve stopped
Slowly it turns the small hands on your wrist
The knots in your belly have clenched like a fist
You picture the east and close her eyes
For the dawn’s a coming in all of our lives
The night’s now bleeding forever it tilts
Circling the orbit no rest from the filth
Rivers are flowing and spirits are dim
And the skies from the ocean will always stand still
The pain from the east has moved to the west
These days are numbered just like the rest
Blind in the rivers the hand clears it away
The whole world has changed in less than a day


Details | ABC | |

SCRAMBLED HEARTS 2

WHAT WILL I SAY?
THAT WOULD BE HEARD.....
WHY DO THEY THINK I LIED?
WHEN MY HEART HURTS
ALL YET IN SCRAMBLED NATURE
I BUT STILL SPEAK
OH TEARS ALARMING FILL MY EYES
MY WHOLE BODY BRUISED WITH FEARS!
OF CEASELESS BITES AHEAD
OH HAVE MERCY
ON MY FAST BEATING HEART
PANTING FROM THNE FRIGHTS
THAT INFLICTED ON IT
ALL LAID TO REST IN PIECES
MY LONELY AND SCRAMBLED HEART.


Details | Couplet | |

Goodbye to an Austin Angel

She was headed off to college at 18 years old,
News of the crash leaked out, and the mood turned cold.
She was the best person you could ever know,
When she danced with her team she put on a show.
Recently in Ohio, I found this rock,
With its angelic shape I found this cross-walk.
In the crosswalk I found my old best friend,
If only my heart could find a way to mend.
As a young country singer once sang, 
“18 years have come and gone,”
It’s hard at this point, it’s hard to move on,
I guess it’s time to move down the line,
I need a reassuring sign to ease my mind. 
Goodbye my friend, may heaven treat you well,
In the past, I will no longer dwell.
Hello my guardian angel, you are my eyes,
For you are with God, and He is wise.
Goodbye Tracie Lynn, you made people smile,
I’ll be there for you after a while. 


Details | Free verse | |

Rained Filled Clouds

Rain filled clouds are what follow me now ,
No sunshine for me these days and smiles are not aloud.
My sight is blurry now and can't listen to what you say,
It was you who has caused this and why I am feeling this way.
Hold on tightly now It has been the ride of my life ,
But somehow it slipped away like a thief in the night .
How did I not see it so plainly writen on the wall,
Never in a million years did I expect to lose it all.
But here I am standing with my back  turned away,
For I can not face the sadness you brought me this day.
Why has this happened to me and just what will I do,
Shell of a man in a life that was suppose to be spent with you.
It's over now and it's all becuase of you 
I just cant see  theres anything you can do .
 Blinded by the love  for you never a  reason to doubt,
So quickly I learned howI will be going without.
 The warmth of a love you brought to me ,
 Now I will live without what was meant to be .
You were always a a part of the world I've grown to know,
Now that your gone the sadnees in my face will forever show.
These cloudy days bring me nothing but pain,
My life forever will be only me standing in the rain.
TAC


Details | Free verse | |

Stand Still

You always said you would be my crying shoulder, but you can't be this tme. It's you that has caused these tears. It isn't your fault. I can't be what you need, but I tried so very hard. I know I can't change your mind now. I have been here though three before, so why should one more be much different. I know you love poetry, and I love you so this is dedicated to you. Maybe one day you will realize that the truth has been in front of you the whole time. You will finally mend the heart of the one who mended your's so many times before. Just to ease your mind, don't worry about me I will be "fine." There isn't anything that can change how things are or how I feel so I guess now we are at a stand still.


Details | Verse | |

Is There Still Good in You

You beat me down,
Told me not to cry,
Not to show weakness.
You showed me no sign,
Of ever loving me,
Showing no sympathy.
You hit me down again,
and just my luck,
You didn't give a crap,
But I still believed there was good in you.

I let you hit me, 
Thinking it was alright.
You told me not to cry,
And to hold it all inside,
But I let a tear fall,
And then you saw,
Now I fell with it.
But I still believed there was good in you.

Days grew longer,
As life got shorter.
I may have only been eight,
But I still had a great ache.
I didn't understand what was happening,
Why did I keep ending up in the clinic,
With scars on my wrists?
Because you hadn't loved me enough.
You crushed my spirits,
And put a hole in my heart.
There is no good in you.
I don't know what my father saw in you.

Now I'm stuck with a twisted mind,
And can't make sense of any kind.
I cannot find,
Who I really am,
Because you never gave a damn.
So now you see,
How I have come to be.
Just a lost puppy,
This is me.


Details | Rhyme | |

Moving On

I've been knocked to the ground, I'm as low as can be
The thoughts that run through my mind are why oh why, and woe is me
It seems I've been here before, and I can see clearer
The reasons are the same and the heartache comes nearer
Though I'm broken and hurt and as sad as can be
The only way to feel better is to create a new me
So this time I must build a thicker wall,
And pick up the pieces of my broken heart
The past is the past, and I can't let it follow
Though I still feel the pain, I can't go on in sorrow
I wish I had been enough, that I was worth more effort,
But now I know, I can't chase air forever
I wish I could say I don't care anymore,
But the truth is my darling, that's why it hurts more.
But it's obvious from all of the struggles we've had
As hard as I try, this will just end up sad. 
I wish you the best, really I do
And there will always be a place in my heart reserved for you
I will smile and laugh and rise above,
And then one day I hope, I can again find love.
So Lord give me strength as I go through this trial,
I am ready to accept things and be no longer in denial.
Thank you my dear, for times I can't forget
And for that time in my life, you really were the best.
People will love you, then hurt you and leave,
But the test is how we endure and grieve.
My path is uncertain, and it scares me to death,
But I will move forward and try to live with each breath.
Remember me please, when you think of the past,
And I will try to remember, that some good things, just aren't meant to last


Details | Verse | |

Pay for

God will never forget what you've done,
God will always remember your faults.
He'll forgive you someday,
No doubts in that, but
For the pain that you caused
You will be paying through life,
Every day, every night, every second,
Every beat of the time
You will pay for the grief that
You brought to my life.


Details | Free verse | |

Once Here Now Dead

Once here
Now dead & gone
“What am I known for, this time round?”
I exist only as a memory now
A memory that fades, over time
“Who will remember me, when I am gone?”

No one knew me
Yet people will say they knew me, so well!
A laugh, how often people think “they are experts”
Yet, really
Know nothing at all!

“How well did you know the inside of me?”
For, if I was to ask...
“What is my favourite colour?”
Or, “what’s my favourite song?”
I listen for answers...none come

“What’s my favourite food to eat?”
Complete silence...
I could hear a pin drop
Round...about...now!
“Do these questions fall upon deaf ears?”
For I ask...

“Who truly knew me?”
“What am I known for?”
“Who will remember me?”
When I am dead & gone


Details | Rhyme | |

My Father of Shadows and Lines

My father’s a memory of shadows and lines
In black and white photos his smiling face shines
A man in a war
With a family of four
And just another victim of his times

The year was 1951
He left behind three girls – one son
A pilot and plane
Nothing left but his name
And I’m left with no memories to come

As I sit and write these lines
I think of him and my heart pines
I was just four
When he was no more
My father’s just a memory of shadows and lines.

Mdailey	6/16/11
Contest:  Shadows and Lines


Details | Rhyme | |

The Towers of NYC The Day They Fell

Two standing structures standing up so high touching  tha clear blue sky.
Huge white walls on either side, 
Hundreds of windows reflecting the sky.
 Thousands of workers sit at their desks; unaware  of the fear that is growing near.
its 8:45 people still come to arive; but soon they'll be fighting to survive.
The north tower is struck by a plane and  the 1st tower is turned into a flame.
 
Smoke and ash flow throughout the buliding as people below are screaming.
Videos recording, photos been taken.
News choppers are flying while inside the tower people are dying.
Police try to control the streets as every ones heart beats.
 
People believe its just a plane crash but at 9:03 that rumour is smashed.
The second tower is hit as ash covers people in the street like a pit. 
firefighters suit up to enter the blaze but the smoke is so thick there put in a daze.
Panic and chaos is all around; as bodies jump from windows to fall a long way down .
 
fire is burning all around inside as news crews flim the outside .
People are burning and choking and know that time is getting short .
They ring their families to tell them they'll be fine; but in their hearts they know there out of time .
  
The towers come down with a tundering sound as a great symbol of the U.S is now nothing more than a mess.
Bodies are burnt and burried; sadness is in everyones face as New York City is left a dusty angry place . 
Great towers they used to be; but now these towers of NYC  are just ones memory.


Details | Rhyme | |

Betrayal - Contest

I felt betrayed by God
He took you home to rest.
Forgot he had left me behind
Life now, is an ongoing test

He forgot to take the memories
left them for me to ponder,
those times when happiness 
took me to heaven and yonder.

Now all I have are sad days,
when life is more than I can bear.
When I ask myself why do u stay
why not leave this life to be near?

Then I see the faces around me
That love me,  just as I am
An empty shell devoid of love,
I can’t hurt them.

So I smile and stay here
Write a poem now and then
Trying to put my sorrow behind me
Looking for happiness again.





Details | Rhyme | |

Hidden

A play on words is said,
Lying in your bed,
Always feeling dead, 
Stand and shake your head,
Don't look at what bled.

The words you meant to keep,
Never let them hear you speak,
All a constant bleak,
Show you are not meek, 
Look in to the world and shriek.

Don't let your feelings show,
Keeping silent hidden low, 
Hide from all you owe,
Spill all that was in tow,
Tell them "No!"

Hide who you are,
Held back from afar,
Life like tar,
Wield your scar,
Break free from your mar.


Details | Quatrain | |

Dreams And A Splintered Heart

Memories play in my mind
faded black and blue
remembering mistakes
that I cannot undo
picking up the splinters
of this damaged heart
tired of trying to mend
what always falls apart
sinking broken dreams
of my yesterday
I can't hold on to things
that want to fly away
I'm trying to let go
of what's come to an end
hoping that maybe someday
these wounds will truly mend

By Morgan Mise
Written December 6, 2012)


Details | Light Poetry | |

WHY GOD SELECT YOU

Arthur Ashe-

A Wimbledon legend he,

Took him AIDS as mourning eyes like a Sea,

"Why God selected you for AIDS"? wrote one Ashe,

"When millions playing tennis,became champion I,see,

Then I didn't asked God why me",

Replied Ashe!


Details | Free verse | |

Waiting on That Call

If only I could kiss u as many times as I shed a tear last night.
I wish i were older. I wish people would  realize we are just two lonely kids trying to find a way in this world. I hope when the time comes for us to meet again we don't regret a thing. We will work out perfect we won't have to make anyone happy but ourselves. But for now, goodbye. I hope your life is as fun and amazing as you have made my life these past few months. I hope your successful, and I hope you find someone who loves you as much as I do. I hope you are happy in everything you do. Anyone who is yours is really lucky. Just know that when you need me to keep our promise, to find and fall back in love with each other, I'm where I always said I would be, waiting on that call, and on that day my life will be complete.


Details | Rhyme | |

A Memory Sat In The Corner And Wept

A memory sat in the corner of my mind
And silently wept
For the moment it feared has arrived, 
The dreaded moment when
It finally aged, pointless and hollow, 
A fabric of mind worn-out and yellowed; 
And in so doing exhausting the thrill, 
Those old anticipations and pleasures lived
When revisiting.

Tomorrow the final, lonely walk shall dawn, 
Inevitable, towards oblivion, 
Towards where the memory shall expire
As silently as it now cries; 
Where all its traces will disappear
Even in brief waking-hour dreams.


Details | Rhyme | |

Time Heals All Wounds

Today I couldn’t think of anything but you,
Cause your memory lingers in my mind.
It’s painful and makes me blue;
A way out I try to find,
Cause it’s killing me that I cant be with you.

Tonight I won’t be able to sleep,
Cause your voice will keep me awake.
My life your memory will reap;
All that has happened causes heartache,
Cause my feelings for you were truly deep.

Tomorrow my life will go on,
Cause I don't want to live in the past.
A reality now forgone;
This pain will somehow be surpassed,
And my feelings, someday, withdrawn.


Details | Free verse | |

That Day Came

Pointless…a strange existence, lost in the panoramic leisure of humanity's walk
I am consumed, doomed to non-being, with lingering darkness
A pain to wake up to the sound of its heavy breathing over my head
And it's agonizing wheezing in sun-drooping times

Sometimes tears fall down my face, seeping in the shadows
I am unafraid, jeering poor judgements, squeezing the bile into half-living life
Saddened by the impact of the blows,
The soft kisses being sent my way…only dissolving   
It burns upon my skin, it's ephemeral floatation above my body
I never reach you, that happiness…so close…ever spiraling
My focus blurred…my lenses dirtied, damp, drizzling in the salts of wishes

Moments of your voice, bouncing off my face
Your aromatic wisdom slipping into my eager ears and eyes
Past happiness, now remnants of sad, layered present

Waiting for that day…surely not long enough… I would have waited more
And that day came, when I heard your voice again…
I had waited in monomaniac, obsessive daydream
My mind sure of the stars within you
Faith in you…faith in your shine

It wasn't fair, I know, to assume such magic would occur
I shouldn't have let you become the purpose of the pain I have mastered
Yet that day came. . .
Sunshine through the windows, my mind in a thousand murderous places
Your voice, your presence, your heart, not so far from mine

I could not trust my mouth, so I relied on yours
Knowing only silence would remain in the end
Like the entire world demanded your presence in that very moment,
Your words slipped out faster than I could register
They were terrifying in volume, cold as frosted ice
To see you so rock-layered indifferent
Was the worst pain I had felt since pointless made its way on a page...
Though I knew in my heart you cared,
I would never let my mind believe

The daydreams, once so real, were now nonexistent
I was eaten, chewed up, disposed of in a single chomp of Never-Was
I would have much rather waited longer… I would have been stronger
You disappeared through the doorway, before I could say...Thank You

And from there, I fought the stinging tears with my life
Doomed with the darkness that I could not let break me
I had to wait. I had to wait and make certain no one else was brought down with me
Then, when alone…when all beings slept…while you lay in bed slowly drifting,
I would wake up to the sound of its heavy breathing over my head
Long after sunsets diminished to black
And I could say to myself, that day came
I could make myself let it go...let you go...

And I cried, my small, black companion by my side
Soon even precious he would leave me
In tearful breakage of death
All dreams of you passing on with the one whiskered witness,
All faith, dreams...passion...escaping away....
Through my pouring lenses, out my ripped heart... and into the night...


Details | Narrative | |

The Curse of Unlimited Time

“Don’t forget to take your dose.”
My stomach in knots, as I shakily spoke.
“Baby, you know my death is coming close.”
“But mommy, I don’t want you to go.”

Doctors walked past,
Blurs of white stepping in and out fast,
As my mother and I tried to make the night last,
Pulling out memories and revisiting the past.

All of our ‘remember when’s’,
Made me wish I was there again,
Back when I thought there was time to spend,
With my mom, on who I could always depend.

“Why’d this have to happen now?”
My lips trembled as thoughts were spoken aloud.
“How can we change it, baby? Please, tell me how.”
“Cancer can’t take you! It’s not allowed!”

I crawled up beside her,
Beside my hero, my mother,
I heard the slow heart of my source of will-power,
And cursed the sickness that absorbed and devoured.

My mind rushed with things I needed to say,
Secrets that I kept so they’d stay out of the way.
But I was cut short as time ticked away,
And only one memory in my mind began to play.

“Remember when I started to cry,
That one day you never told me goodbye?
I always knew it was a silly reason why,
But you came back anyways and this was your reply.”

“My pretty little princess, I love you!
And I will always know you love me too.
So if I forget to say bye, please don’t be blue,
Because our bond is strong and will always stay true.”

The memory made up for things I couldn’t tell her,
And in this moment it made me feel the slightest bit better.
But yet all these emotions were flooding like water,
As I knew I was going to lose my mommy forever.

“I promise I love you baby, that’s all you need to know,”
And this time it was her voice that shakily spoke.
“I’m not scared of death, I’m just scared of letting you go.”
She winced in pain, death was too close.

“Mommy!” I screamed, scared out of my mind.
She smiled, then it faded as she laid there and died.
It’s indescribable what loss and longing I felt inside,
My mind went numb as I couldn’t bring myself to cry.

I need you,
I want you,
I miss you…

I love you mommy.


Dedicated to all who have lost their moms.
In sickness or old age,
Whatever it may have been,
This is for you.



Details | Rhyme | |

Faceless Visions

Stepping out of the darkness
From a somewhat forgotten place
Steps what looks like a man
With everything but a face 
He steps out of a doorway 
Of an old rickety shack 
In torn up bloodstained overalls 
And a cowboy hat
He came off the porch 
In full stride 
I heard him whisper something in tongues 
And spit smoke when he walk by
A breeze of unpleasantness 
Came soon there after 
Followed by a strong smell of sulfur  
And intense laughter 
Then as the figure 
Got further away 
I saw him stop and turn around
And murmur my name
In voice I hadn't heard 
In a very long time 
It triggered a memory from my childhood 
Buried deep with in my mind
A one that id forgotten
And didn't know i had
As it came to me whose it was
It made me sad
Tears came to my eyes
And started to fall 
But turned to smoke 
When I started to ball
Then the door of that rickety shack
Flung wide open 
And i could see a bright black glow
Of a fire that was heavily smoking
And 2 glowing chains  
At lighting speed 
Grazed my face 
As it flew by me
They went threw the figure
And snatched him back 
Back into the fire
Of that rickety shack

    I don't know if that was the end of 
that dream or not I'll find out tonight. 
And just since your probably wondering who 
or what that figure is or who I think it is 
from the voice I heard I truly believe it is
my father who committed suicide when I was 10


Details | I do not know? | |

A Shinning Star

A shining star a loyal son 
 That smile, that wave you were special to us John 
 We watched you grow as if you were our own 
 And now we face the future all alone 
 You set yourself apart from the family 
Yet you could never escape their tragedy 
We think about what could have been 
 And shake our heads and say what a sin 
 We hoped and prayed they were wrong 
 We are haunted by the memory of that song 
 Forever young you will always be 
And now you’re with John and Bobby 

In Memory of John Kennedy Jr


Details | Rhyme | |

One Year

31,536,000 seconds and we age one year,
Time never to be replaced,
Things we did and did not do,
All the happiness and all the fear.

525,600 minutes and we age one year,
Edging closer to our demise,
Finite things to see and love,
To touch and to hear.

8,760 hours and we age one year,
The choices that we made,
Remaining safe behind our masks,
Or risk shedding a tear.

365 days and we age one year,
Following a narrow path,
Steady and acquiescent did we stay,
Or off the trail did we veer.

52 weeks and we age one year,
Our youth falls far behind,
Activities we much enjoyed,
Now too much to bear.

12 months and we age one year,
The people we have met
The places we have gone
The faces we did wear.

4 seasons and we age one year,
Life now so expeditious,
The future becomes blurred
And the past becomes so dear.

By Warren Wurzburger
June 2011


Details | Free verse | |

ACROSS THE SEAS OF TIME

Pine not for the times of yore

and the voices not forgotten

They’ve sailed unto a distant shore

to a land naught misbegotten

They’ve traveled over the golden seas

to a land with choicest fruit

and left the land of mallow lees

and the melodies of lute

on the vigils cliffs we stand

neath the hot and steamy sun

holding hearts within our hand

to those we miss now gone

 

COPYRIGHT © 2014 PoetryofProvidence
C Michael Miller
via Duboff Law Group LLC


Details | Rhyme | |

Driving Through Yesterday

There's still light down this glistening black road,
a path to travel with the moon shining by my side.
Much like my own way, for some time greatly shadowed -
and yet something shows the way for this quiet ride.

The steadfast celestial guardian ever watches me,
even when its face is hidden by time's flow.
'Twould be the only light by which I could see,
if not for the headlights' soft glow.

Pensiveness seems to be the rule of the drive -
sound is muffled, like it's not allowed entry
on these heavy thoughts through which I strive;
that silver disc, as ever, a silent sentry.

That sound tires make on a road that's just seen rain,
the tiny taps of the drizzle dampening the way.
The red lights in the distance, now moving to a new lane,
the dawn coming far off, yet heralding another day.

The weight of the past in the passenger seat,
showing different faces from my history.
I wonder as I see one in particular on repeat -
when you're alone, do you think of me?

This way comes the inexorable march of that dawn,
and still night's orb watches as I'm vexed by she.
A grey sky overlooks, as one query I yet dwell upon -
when you're alone, do you think of me?

I shake my head as if to dislodge these thoughts,
eager to continue this drive's long quest.
If that's to outrun, or untie, these kind of knots,
I still as of yet cannot truly attest.


Details | Rhyme | |

My earliest memory

my earliest memory is when I was three
for I tried to run away from home you see
my sisters used to call me names and tease
laugh at me if I fell on my knees
they thought it was funny picking on someone small
but I did not see the funny side at all
but these painful childhood memories I choose not to recall
as if they never happeend at all
I forgive  you and I forget
 and my birth I do not regret
so it does not matter what they said or did
 for back then they were just a kid
 God has a purpose for me
His true  Love set me free from thee
so I forgive all the things that you do
and may peace always be with you.


inspired by Danielle Whites' my earliest memory contest.


Details | Free verse | |

Give up Fight

You always seem
To wander into my dreams
But I love you too much
To ever call you my fiend
Biggest mistake I ever made
Put my heart on a stake
Only to watch it drain
Of every bit of life left
I was blinded in my false fame
Regretful, I lay here dying
To be in your arms is what I'm crying
Cold and helpless I have not a soul
Because without you I have not a home
Cannot escape my mistake as I lay awake
Shattered my heart seems
For his annihilated state
How much more can I take?
Never want to sleep again
I know what I have done
All I can see is your sweet eyes
I give up, only to run
So take my heart and bleed it dry
Take my soul, feed it to the night
I cannot go on, I give up fight
For my only fear
Is not being with you
At the end of my life.................


Details | Rhyme | |

The Letter Life Can Be So Unfair

You tug at my heart strings 
Your memory plays with my mind 
So many tears this brings 
Sorrow i thought would heel over time 

But time has come and gone 
My heart still feels the same 
With each passing dawn 
Your memory still remains

I forever wanted to hold you 
To never let you go 
But no one ever knew 
This would never be so

Holding on to your picture
Wished i kept that lock of hair 
So much sorrow i endure 
Oh how life is so unfair


Never did i know 
That hug would be the last 
It was the day you had to go 
Leaving only memories of are past


I sadly often speak of you 
I have the memories i can share
Always ending with who ever knew 
How life can be so unfair

I hear we all have a day 
That are life here must end 
Until than i will pray
For my heart to mend

Until that day comes for me 
Your memory in rhyme i share
Again it will be you and me 
Speaking on how life can be so unfair










Details | I do not know? | |

Why'd You Have To Go?

Why’d you have to go?
This is home,
This is were the heart is,
Where your start is.
And this is where you sat
Everyday
And every night I look
But I can’t stay,
Have to look away,
It’s your memory that haunts me,
You memory that taunts me,
And I have to run away.
I know if I stay
That I’ll just waste away.
I know that I have to go,
I put on a good show
But the fights over,
I can go.
But your memory it haunts me,
Still always taunts me.
And I’m afraid I’ll go down,
And get stuck in that hole in the ground
That leads to hell.
Hope you’re well,
Because rotting in this I won’t be.
In my own house,
Your house,
Hell looks a lot like home.
Why’d you have to go?


Details | Bio | |

Abusers You Need To Hear This

What  you  may not  understand is  when a abuser abuses someone. They destroy the trusting mind of the person that is  being abused. 
No matter  what  age  for what ever illness you  have . You  have no right  to  abuse anyone  young or  old  alike  male  or   female  alike.words  do hurt just  like physical abuse. It remains  in  a person's  mind  for years to follow.Not trusting others  due to the fact  of  being abuse  is  very hard there is always  some  doubt.Successful relationships are hard to have.Watching Tv  reading the paper  may click this  memory  that is wished  to  be erased forever. There is  no miracle  medcine or no medical procedure that can take that  memory away.So before you abuse  take this in mind. 
Keep your  mouth and  hands to yourself.Seek help  that  you  so need. 
Noone asks to be sexually or physically or  mentally  abused. 


Details | Verse | |

First Drop Of Rain

When the first drop of rain falls
you know I will be gone.
When the flowers start to bloom
I will be on my way.
Tell me, darling, years from now 
when the rain comes to fall,
would your memory of me linger,
would you still remember me?

You know I've been so lucky
for having known your love.
I've always loved you dearly,
believe me it is true.
But you see I just have to go
for the wind is calling me.
Let me kiss you one last time,
take this heart of mine.

When the first drop of rain falls
you know I will be gone.
When the flowers start to bloom
I will be on my way.
Tell me, darling, years from now 
when the rain comes to fall,
would your memory of me linger,
would you still remember me?

The days spent in the sunshine
are just but memories now.
The laughter we shared together
is all in the distant past.
Let's be thankful we had each other
for nothing in this world could last.
So let's make love one last time,
spread our wings and fly.


Details | Romanticism | |

Lovingly insane

The memory of one night recently
Still wanders intently through my brain
I hear your voice in darkness and it leaves me
Longing for more and it excitedly drives me insane
You again had taken me places, and I ever so willingly went,
That no man has ever been able to find
All that with just you speaking to me through the phone line
Even with many around you made me feel safe with your voice being so sweet,
sexy and very kind
If all this with just talking over the phone imagine if I again ever get your touch
No control for me would be able to be contained because I need that so much
but this with her is something you have to do, you have to try
Yet you hold your hands to cover my eyes from this your afraid I'll cry
You keep the truth from me because of how I may take it I need to know why
I'm stronger now than you know
Do you cover my eyes from your truth
Because you don't just want to hurt my feelings and you want them spared
Or do you hold you hand there 
Because deep down for me you and in love with me to and it's more right now 
then you realize or let yourself care
You go ahead and try to work it all out between you two
Hope she feels lucky or once again have another chance with you
I sure would if in her shoes
I would show you all what as a man you deserve
I hope you give it a really good chance on making it all work out
Because if you didn't you wouldn't be the man you are and have always been to 
everyone who's ever known you
You wouldn't then be doing just everything  you could possibly do
It's true
So do it don't stop until you're done
If you need someone to talk to
I'll still be here
And still be trying not for you to shed one single tear
And please know that I have always loved you
I believe towards me you feel that way to
Here is where I'll be
If and when you need me
When you remember when you see
The other night so recently
How the memory wanders through your brain
How we can yet still drive each other so lovingly insane


Details | I do not know? | |

Since you went away

Without the trace of our love being left here, no memory from the past can ever 
cover the road that we once traveled,  No day can ever compare to the mist in the 
morning when the fog would surround the window that we one as a couple, 
would look beyond, something that our future would hold.


When the night comes and the stars seem to shine on me, the glare of my face 
should tell you that I miss you, your kiss, your touch, and those arms that would 
hold me at night. When there is no more left of me, no more tears that can be 
cried I will once think of you, and how you wiped my eyes.


There will be no worry’s that I have to dream about, there will be no more joy in 
my life that was mistaken as a happen moment, nor a reminisce to your love. 
Under the dirt of the ground will you find my heart, will you find my soul pouring 
out to you, begging you for forgiveness. My weakness is no longer a distance 
from here.  

Just a moment’s time can you image when I will come back to that place where 
no only us but the spirits of will remind us of what we shared, the pictures that sit 
upon the shelf that we built together; hand in hand, side by side. 

Since the day looked past that road where burned bridges were left behind, I no 
longer linger the sound of being there before. To me I will look at it as a memory 
from the past. A moment of that day. The love we had together. Since you went 
away. 


Details | I do not know? | |

Katrina, The Memory Of Yesterday

Katrina is the memory of yesterday
Once a reality, now a dream of today.
Her destruction of disaster she sent about
Leaving the gulf of catastrophies with-out.
Properties damaged and most lifes are gone
Survivors are making it, as help continues to grow strong.

Although, their lifes have been shattered apart
As they try to pull together their damaged hearts.
For katrina has destroyed their memories of yesterday
Leaving them with a reality dream of today.
Katrina is a memory, a reality dream
A destruction catastrophy, a disaster theme.

A dream foretold of a disaster made known
For katrina is the memory that lives on.
Who knows tomorrow what their lifes will be
Filled with heartakes from this catastrophy.
Once a reality, now a dream of yesterday
Katrina is the memory of today.


Details | Free verse | |

Loneliness, So Beautiful-

We go through life thinking of each other
And I can’t help it when I see you…smile
But now that is just a memory in my mind
From time to time, we dream in our sleep
Images of you, seem to cloud…my mind
And I think that my mind is telling me that I miss being with you
I wish I were in a dream…so that I can be with you
I long to stand by your side once more if I could…

But I go my way, you go your own, for eternity
But keep the memory of our last kiss, just for me…
Even though you may have forgotten about me
I know that you still care for me, even though I’m lonely…

I know memories are meant to be remembered
Though some of them, are best…forgotten
Hopefully, I don’t end up being forgotten completely
You may not love me, like you used to
You may not even like me…at all
But even so, it wont take away my feelings for you
I wish I could go back in time…and correct all my mistakes
I want to take back everything wrong that I have done to you…

But life passes us by, people forget, it’s just how it is
Unfair life really is, especially for me…
These tears that I hold back, are beginning to hurt me
But I know that you still care for me, at least barely…
But I go my way, you go your own, for eternity
But keep the memory of our last kiss, just for me…
Even though you may have forgotten about me
I know that you still care for me, even though I’m lonely…


Details | Free verse | |

So Sudden

So sudden was the thrusts
So quick the pain fades
That my mind didn't fully comprehend
what it is my body was really doing
I spent hours thinking about this
and i've written countless poems
I always wondered what this would be like
I always wondered what poems I would form
about this specific experience
But now as I sit here devirginized
I couldn't help but feel sad 
The little girl in me has finally been set free
and I feel like i'm in a trance 
I regret nothing and I don't regret this
Cause truly the memory of this one day
will bring a smile to my face once we go
down memory lane
It all happened so sudden
I had come to a decision 
after so much thinking and fear
but the moment came 
and bursts of pleasure flowed through out my body
forming images in my head like fire works 
I experienced pain. The nagging wincing type
the kind of pain you feel when the dentists pulls a tooth
So conscience was this fear of mines
I shivered even just thinking about doing the deed
yet when the time came I got lost in the moment
and I lose my virtue right along with it
For future reference i'm a mixture of sad and happy
My first time couldn't have happened any better than this
I'm proud of myself that I really went through with it
After all the stories i'd heard and the fear that had been instilled
                  I worked it like a soilder
                   and truly I don't regret anything
                      
 
 


Details | Free verse | |

Memory Lane

Come with me, let's remember the days
 when life was easy and free,
  let's turn back the pages of time
   and be young once again.

Can you hear the song playing,
 do you hear its haunting strain?
  do you recall the traces of the music
   coming down memory lane?

My life is so empty, I need to escape,
 those happy days are dead and gone,
  they will never come back again,
   so here I just pretend.

Can you hear the song playing,
 do you hear its haunting strain?
  do you recall the traces of the music
   coming down memory lane?

Yes, it floats down memory lane.


Details | Free verse | |

man with a memory

sitting beside her,
he senses a void he knows he'll never fill,
a memory that was lost,
long ago when her life began,
a man with a memory,
one he can't quite see,
one he barely remembers,
but hold so dear,
what could this memory be?
this secret he hides inside, 
how can she just sit there,
empty and forgetting even more,
loosing all the memories,
longing for one last word,
one trace of this memory,
but this man with a memory,
keeps his memory inside,
letting this child beside him,
fade into the worlds eyes,


Details | Lyric | |

Memory Lane

Tonight as I walk down memory lane, I have no hand to hold, I'm all alone
The garden rose is wilted and dead, like my heart since you went away 
Fall has come here today, with dead leaves falling all around
A broken mirror lies on the ground, with no reflection of you today

As I walk this lane of tears, I see the images of broken hearts
I see those days of golden bliss, turn to days of of blue and gray
The lane is full of war and pain, of two broken hearts torn apart
There's spots of black on the lane, from our days of when we'd stray

{Chorus}
Memory lane covered with tears, it's ditches flooded from our eyes
So many glasses from the face, covered in mud on memory lane
The miles are long so full of sorrow, from that night of sad goodbyes
It seems so long it never ends, filled with images of only pain

There is no sun just dark and blue, not even days of I love you
I look to the sky on memory lane, but only see raining tears
So I turn around and walk right back, gotta get off of this memory lane
I pray someday that I will find, the way to rid me of my fears

{Chorus}
Memory lane covered with tears, it's ditches flooded from our eyes
So many glasses from the face, cover in mud on memory lane
The miles are long so full of sorrow, from that night of sad goodbyes
It seems so long it never ends, filled with images of only pain


Details | I do not know? | |

Is It Over

 Is it over
Have we lost what we thought would never die
Promises made are broken and lost forever
My heart will still always love you forever
Why I ask has this happened to me
How can the love we had cease to be
I still hope we can find our way
And our paths will join like they did that day
You are the one chosen for me
I know in time this too you will see
Somewhere deep in your heart
There is the memory of me that will never part
When you find that memory 
I pray it will show you we are meant to be


Details | I do not know? | |

memory of you

even though we may be apart
my memory of you
will always be in my heart
this i know is true

but this is what haunts me the most,
my memory of you,
is the ghost
of the past we once had,
the future that never became

in time the wounds will heal
but the scars will remain
to remind me
of the beautiful angel I have lost


Details | I do not know? | |

I Sold My Soul

I lost a part of me today . . . a part of me that I held so close 
I broke a memory into a million pieces, 
A memory of love, a love I compared to my love for the Lord

So deep, so pure, so innocent 
I sit in pain, body and soul aching . . . dying to cry, but
Holding it in 
As to not feel weak 
I'm broken, a piece of me dead and gone, vanished 
An unfair trade of my soul for sheer pleasure 
I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to kill you 
I didn't mean to cause you misery, I didn't mean to see you
Dying 
And not save you 
I'm sorry, so sorry