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Love Angst Poems | Love Poems About Angst

These Love Angst poems are examples of Love poems about Angst. These are the best examples of Love Angst poems written by international PoetrySoup poets

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Details | Lyric | |

MY BRIGHT DAY

He said he loved 
And said he cared
On my darkest day
Said he'd be there
The clouds moved in
The sky grow black
Never said goodbye
He never came back
Rain turned to tears
And fears to dread
Hope seemed lost
Dreams were dead
Last gasp prayer
The sun rose again
You walked by me
With a friendly grin
Ten years passed
And I'm your wife
We have two kids 
And a wonderful life
Been through storms
You didn't walk away
On darkest nights
You're my bright day

12-13-14


Details | Ballad | |

Bloom Not, Wolfsbane

Bloom not, cruel wolfsbane
In this forward spirit of mine
Let the moon dim and wane
For love has diseased my kind 

The girl was luscious in the wake
Rising at break of dawn
If only she knew I was a mistake
Before we made the bond

I grew fond of her everyday
And night gave me loathe and dread
My heart was weak, I couldn’t send her away
But fed in her desires instead

I kissed her in the forest of green
I had forgotten what I am
I gazed into those eyes, so keen!
A smooth and gentle lamb

 
One day I stopped to think a bit
My stomach wrenched and twirled
Through love I had lost my sense and wit
To a pitiful village girl!

Avoiding her best I could
I hid from beauty’s caresses
But again she found me in the wood
And so grew the obsession

But so grew the moon
And the waning was abstaining
Good night, wonders of the noon
With memories remaining

Alone I wandered in the cold
Knowing it was coming
The sky grew dark, the sun was sold
Behind the madness blooming 

Transforming! Changing!
My mind went all a blur
Rage deforming! Madness deranging!
I couldn’t think of her…  

The time was gone!
The night had come!
I thought I was alone
But then I saw her standing there
Pale and stiff as stone

I woke up that dawn sitting there
On the forest floor
And there lay she all bloodied and bare
The lamb that I adore!

The wounds I found were like a gift
I know they were from my girl
I’m glad she fought her will to live
As I blindly devoured her

An honorable lamb with bloodied hooves
She’ll never leave my vision
Sacrificed for ravenous wolves  
And no cry for jurisdiction 

 Bloom not cruel wolfsbane
In this forward spirit of mine
Let the moon dim and wane
For love has diseased my kind 

-an oldie , hehe
For Pd's Contest : )



Details | Ballad | |

This Song is for my Mother

This song is for my mother
Let her hear me cry
I couldn’t bring myself to write it
‘Til this darkened day arrived
A song about old promises 
Made so long ago
Created and cremated
Ashes of the words I spoke

Long separated by the miles
Distanced from her golden smiles
Memory of a mother
Shared my dreams and really cared

Long separated by the miles
Distanced from her golden smiles
Mama…
I know I wasn’t there……

For you

Would have placed 
A magic carpet 
‘neath your weak and shaky legs

Would have raised
A strong west wind
Let you breathe with ease again

Would have bribed 
God’s venal angels
Come and soothe your endless pain

Would have vanquished
All the demons
And bring peace to you again

Be the child
I never knew
In a land
We won’t grow old

Be the light
I always loved
Warmed my dark 
And lonely soul

Be the girl
Playing games
In a world 
The sun won’t set

Be the laughter
Calms my heart
I never will forget
I won’t forget, won’t forget

This song is for my mother
Let her hear me cry
Couldn’t bring myself to write it
‘Til this darkened day arrived
Song about old promises 
Made so long ago
Created….cremated
Ashes of the words I spoke

I broke my promises, oh mama
Now you’ve gone away 
I’m broken
Drowning in the pain each day

I’m  drowning…drowning...drowning…drowning

This song is for my mother
Let her hear me…….



Details | Free verse | |

Paranoid love

Tell me that this fear is just paranoia in my mind, 
we're not straining, we're not struggling, 
we're not sinking, we're just fine. 
I'm not perfect my dearest, but damn have I tried, 
and I'll try harder but I know I'll have the same results every time. 
Do you want me all the ways that I am? 
With all the struggles and the tears and the clinging to your hand. 
I fear your getting further and Im left on the shore to stand, 
watching you in the distance with a bullet in my hand. 
Tell me all this worry, its just clutter in my mind, 
tell me not to worry that we're doing just fine. 
Cause Im scared to run you off and I feel Im falling deep. 
And Im so frightened of these thoughts that its getting hard to sleep.
All I know is that the heart wants what it desires, 
because of you the match inside has turned into a fire. 
And I feel the broken glass thats sticking from my skin, 
Wondering if you'll remove the pain or push it back in. 
My hearts frantic wondering if you feel the same, 
pleading and begging for more than just a saying, 
but to feel and to see that im not alone, 
with being in this love thats overwhelming. 
Once I told you that we didnt have a spark, 
but you were lighting up and I was sitting in the dark. 
And this fire, this blaze its wrapped in desire. 
Im terrified to lose you, I think I might die or, 
maybe disappear from all the pieces falling out, 
im going crazy but when i open my mouth, nothing comes out, 
and I cant explain to you why I just need to hold you close, 
why every time you leave Im scared to let you go, 
why these tears are building up behind my eyes, 
all I know is that the heart wants what it desires 
and it desires to be your wife. 
So tell me in my panic, that your words are true, 
tell my my dearest what I mean to you, 
tell me that this paranoia is all within my mind 
we're not struggling, we're not sinking tell me we're just fine


Details | Free verse | |

These ribbons I tie as you leave

Blue – 
for your arm wrapped around
my clavicle. I thought
I would loose my breath.

Red – 
for the cusp of our hip bones
struggling to pull the drunken color
from our orange cheeks.
and our sweat, our sweat, our sweat
evaporating 
in the drenched summer air.
Our pants futile afterthoughts
Left crumpled on the floor
It is here I asked for your respect
And you filled me with it.


Orange – 
for the musk smell of our blanket den. I would watch the way dawn light
speckled your shoulders, pale, white-blue
Iridium. 
I would trace the ink
of your skin, fingertip hovering a half inch
from your bone. 

Green – 
for how my name would hesitate
on your breath in brief puffs 
like dandelion seeds blown from 
My wistful lips when I was 
eleven 
waiting for them to bring back my wish.

Black – 
for my sleeveless dress, as we strolled from 
your father’s funeral.  

It was the only time I watched you cry.

There were little holes in the cement sidewalk.
They filled with rain, oil
And your tears.
I watched your face change through 
their watery colored reflections.


Pink – 
for the way your skin repels from my 
Touch, quivers as though my finger- 
print were a red hot poker.
You haven’t allowed me to touch you
In a year.

Purple – 
for the color of her font, as she responds to you. It is an eager
Color. She responds with all the passion of an Eskimo kiss. 

You left her waitng..always.

I have been special to you,
she replies to your
overtures.

Her letters 
Who blush
like a maid
Who’s felt the hot moist
whisper of something naughty
tickle against her ear lobe.

White – 
for the way your eyes punch accusations
sharper then your razor tongue.

They spit 
blue crackled lightening,
like an angry alley cat.

My words cannot reach you here.
You will leave.

We will divide our booty

Words that once held my name like a piece
Of carefully folded origami
now hiss cold 
devoid like the plaster of our empty room.

Grey- 
for the morning 
now knocking on my window.

I am livid in my withdrawal, tossing and turning
I can find no comfort
in
the tangle of these vacant sheets. 




Details | Free verse | |

Dagger of Love

I may not always write about you,
About the way your energy,
Caresses my spine,
And sends jolts of electrity,
Racing through my body,
Exploding each cell like fireworks.
I may not write about,
The way my dreams at night,
Fill with you and I dancing,
Heat bashing our skin,
Filling us with an unquencable need,
Touch beconing a new meaning.

I may not write about,
The way your eyes stare into mine,
Past the years I have seen,
And into the soul that I am,
Spirit colliding with spirt,
Melting together like Iron to form a sword. 

I may not write about,
A love that we experience,
Through star strewed skies,
And blood soaked ground,
That causes even the fearful sight,
Of bombs exploding to look beautiful. 
I may not write about you and I,
How I fill up your soul and your mind,
With thoughts and words and images,
That melt and form new words,
Your lovely muse who so beguiles you,
With a double bladed sword. 

But Darling, don't let your heart,
Get away from itself,
Don't let your heart take the fall.
The wound I cause shall soon heal,
And you will read words,
Of another man, dancing with me,
Of another man, touching my soul,
His finger tips brushing the sides,
Of my breasts, his lips trailing down my neck,
Whispering with the heat of hells fires,
All that could be between, his and mine. 
You will read lines that speak,
Of a sensual romance, 
Pools and puddles of lust between thighs,
And an ancient sweetness,
That rivals Greek Ambrosia. 
It is no fault of your own,
You have fallen and I have shown you,
The sharp dagger of my love. 


Details | Rhyme | |

Sinister Encounter

Poe laid flowers on her grave
    His lost Lenore
    One he’d love forevermore 
    But doomed to see her nevermore

Storm clouds expelled true daylight
     Yet near her grave on a dead oak tree
     An ebony raven stared and seemed to agree
     “Nevermore,” the bird mocked, flying off with ironic glee

Clouds burst, pelting the cemetery with rain
     Back to his horse and carriage Poe ran
     Was Poe a pawn in this raven’s game plan
     An unhealthy racing of his heart began

Arriving home, Poe sought to forget
     But there was the red-eyed, sinister bird
     Perched on the pallid bust of Pallas, it said just one word
     “Nevermore,” was all Poe heard

Stealthily the bird had entered through an open window
     “Did God summon you to add to my grief?”
     Poe pleaded, “Will I ever find relief?”
     “Nevermore,” cried the demon, to Poe’s disbelief

Poe tried to rid his home of the tormenting invader
     “Fly away; take your word with you!”
     But the evil visitor would not bid adieu
     Its single word was malicious; Poe could not misconstrue

When rainfall ended, the raven flew to the windowsill
     “Be gone!” Poe screamed, his voice filled with hate
     It eyed him once more, leaving Poe in a crazed state
     But loving memories of Lenore it could not desecrate



*Written October 1, 2014


Details | Elegy | |

This Mountain Here

I remember the day I got the call.
My world fell apart.
I had lost it all.

I remember the day you were taken from me.
I knew your beautifull smile I would never again see.

They said it was a mugger and you put up a fight.
I should not have  let you go out that night.

It seems like just yesterday we fed eachother our wedding cake.
When I remember that memory my hands start to shake.

I sit in my cabin on this mountain with the sky so blue.
I won't leave. This's where I spent my honeymoon with you.

My family wants me to go back into that world, so cold.
I'm not leaving this mountain.
It's where I'll grow old.

They say your gone and will never again be.
Well, I hear what your saying. Yes, I know your talking to me.

You sit in the chair and drink my tea. 
My heart swells up when you smile at me.

They say I've gone insane and see things that aren't there.
If I'm on this mountain here why should they care?

I love you more then I did when we first found this place.
I remeber everything about you, your ellagince and grace.

Why am I not in that world full of anger and fear?
I want to be with you on this mountain here.


Details | Limerick | |

Princess Needs A New Car

Princess just wants a new car.
I have told her that hers will go far.
'Oh, it's really not cool
driving this crap to school.'
'Do I need that emotional scar? '

'The kids will all laugh at the rust.
When we race, I'll be left in the dust! 
I will save up some cash
then we'll make a mad dash
to the car dealer surely you trust'.

'He will make us a wonderful deal
and I'm sure you will know how I feel.
I will love you so much, 
My siblings... I won't touch.
Just get me behind a new wheel'! 

Now she'll be cruisin in style.
She'll be happy for only awhile.
There will always be better
and we'll try hard to get her
a car that will make princess smile.


Details | Narrative | |

The Rose

Once bloomed a rose so young and fair
With dark brown eyes and long black hair

Beside her be a tall dark tree
Whose branches stretch to smother thee

Too close beside the shadowy bark
That soon begins to leave its mark

She cries for help, but none shall hear
Her thorns too sharp, who’d dare go near?

To save this rose, who’d risk their life?
With naught to gain but pain and strife

Alone, afraid, she lays to rest
Her heart beats low inside her chest

And with the hour growing near
She sheds her final grieving tear

And so the rose soon falls asunder
Her final day, eternal slumber

She lies beside the old dark tree
The only one who mourns for thee


Details | Rhyme | |

Remnants

Sad Heart, now thou art wither’d from the Sun,
What man, or god, will near thee run?
Wrought in twist like branches in Tempests' gasp,
What Comfort, or Gauze, shall be near to grasp?
True ones begotten are the ones now Rotten
And the ones now Rotten will never be forgotten
They are merely sad remains of assiduous Tears
That have been meddl’d with and tatter’d Raw throughout the years

And thou, cruel Mind, that sat’st still thru toiling trail of Night;
Must dream your broken Dreams; thou’rt a sanely flight!
Can thou extinguish passions of Fire, Disease, or Rain?
—tho thy distinguish’d influence trains to abstain
Thy Remnants brought to debris in thy Empty street,
Devour’d by Vultures, their bestow’d beaks entreat
Merely are they cleaning an inexhaustible Mess
Alas! Leaving thy rudiments of Identity to redress....



Details | Free verse | |

Roofs and Benches

she sits on roofs, 
he on benches
fingers touch sky,
feet on ground

she savors fruits 
straight from trees
he works hard
to get fruits of labor

leading separate lives
but bound by fate's thread
since birth

...feelings from childhood
could be the purest

dormant yet breathing...

the dreamer,
the worker,
and fate

she still touches skies,
he sits on benches still

both alone
as time moves on...







***just felt like posting something, 
an old poem of mine written November of 2010


Details | Free verse | |

Dear Diary (Dying)

Maybe this can't be saved.

One more short year and I'll never see her again. I'll always be wondering about 
her but it's better left that way. Never been able to face the truth. Even now.

We were all each other needed, some childish indestructable duo of sorts. All 
gone.

Sometimes it's my fault. I've been a cliche since prom night when she came over 
and apologised and suddenly she was perfection. After that I hardly spoke 
around her in case I stuttered or worse, couldn't make her laugh. Was I in love? If 
I was I still am. This intolerable inferiority complex, this petrified fear of not being 
good enough feels all too familiar.

Don't think there was one moment when it all happened, but now I find myself 
smiling arduously in black armour; all that she made me once again 
undermined. I called her my mermaid; sunny skin, the beach in her hair and eyes 
shining with all the colours and tempers of the ocean.

Now she's hacked away every detail of her. Barely recognisable, even to the one 
who used to know her best.

There's a girl I still know, dancing through my memories, but already clinging to 
herself, desperate to remain. She knows she can't stay forever.

We're not the people we were; this can never work.

Today I'm hiding behind a calm and carefree front; she can never know, nor 
understand why. I'm blocking her out.
Out of sight, out of mind
No explanation. We were dying anyway.
But if she asks why I can't see her anymore
How can I even look her in the face?
If that's selfish then at last it's my turn.

I miss her even when we're locked in embrace. Affection is genuine. All else is 
lost. She can't save us, can't put in the effort. I've tried but I'm weak. Another 
excuse to take cover under.

I can't change her back. Why am I trying? I should just make the most of my 
precious friend now.

A little more of her slips away every day.


Details | Free verse | |

FOR RACHAEL

Oh sky look down on this earth of gray,
Something dreadful on the horizon looms.
There is no black and no white today,
Laws exist but justice is doomed.

Morality is labeled religion,
And must be separated from state,
Whose own religion is political correctness
And determining God's fate.

Oh heaven rain down on us,
Ae are tasting your tears.
Yes we've become that bad,
Confirming your fears,

That what has been done ,
Is being done again,
Those lessons taught,
Coming to naught.

Judges and laws make it legal,
To be rid of your innocent babes,
Under a symbol of the eagle, 
God's loving justice betrayed.

Racheal you cry the tears,
That now only heaven supplies,
Because ours have dried,
In the dust of our alibies.

Excuses and lies are linked,
As you and I know well,
The truth is all but extinct.
Truth is foreign to hell.

Oh heaven, look down on this world of gray.   
Something dreadful is watching and looms.
Is there nothing left but to watch and pray,
While Rachael wails by the dumpster tombs?


Details | Ballad | |

Lost Love

If only you could see the tears
In the world you left behind
You fill my days, my nights, my dreams
You’re all that’s on my mind
Your laugh I’ll never hear again
Your smile I’ll never see
Memories now are all I have
Since loneliness found me
Time was never on your side
Your short life had to end
Now I'm left in pain without
My love and my best friend
The sadness, the emptiness
The pain I have to face
Will never leave my life
For you’re a loss I can’t replace
Even though the rain will fall
And the sun will still shine on
My life will just exist
Because my whole world now is gone
You are an Angel high above now
Watching over me
But someday I know once again
Together we will be
For when my time on earth is done
You’ll come and take my hand
And guide us to eternal love
Together in God's land..


By Raina Hutchins


Details | Couplet | |

To All Of You

There are times we are left to cope
With situations that drain our hope

Leaving us full of despair
At how some people just don't care

About the evil that they do
To good people like all of you

We are left to somehow face
That in mankind there is disgrace

And those of us left alive
Must find away to survive

As you pick up the pieces of your life
Without your mother, father, husband or wife

And some of you God forbid
Without the love of your kids

We must band together with a brotherhood
Show that in this world there is some good

Because we are together in this deal
We try to help each other heal

We seek in each other good advice
And offer each other sacrifice

We hold each other in prayer and song
As we continue to re-build the wrong

Because what else in the world can we do
Except let the light of good shine through

The evil darkness and despair
Of a catastrophic lack of care

We want you to know you are not alone
Think of America as a giant cone

And all of us are funneling through
Our prayers and hopes to all of you


Posted for Nathan's 9-11 contest


Details | Free verse | |

Sometimes Heartbroken

Sometimes Heartbroken

I know I still love you
After all that you’ve done
You tell me different lies
Than you told everyone

I try to deny
The pain that’s built up inside
Though, even when I smile
My heart starts to divide

Sometimes heartbroken
Now that I finally realize
The words that you’ve spoken
Were really all lies

Sometimes Heartbroken
I’m dying inside
And I can’t seem to get over you
No matter how hard I tried

Now every time I see you
I feel emptiness in my heart
But then I remember
How you deceived me from the start

Even then I had a feeling
That this may never last
But I can’t help thinking
About throwing away that past

Sometimes heartbroken
Now that I finally realize
The words that you’ve spoken
Were really all lies

Sometimes Heartbroken
I’m dying inside
And I can’t seem to get over you
No matter how hard I tried

So tell me why
You had to lie to me
You may have tricked everyone around you
But you were the one who just couldn’t see

Sometimes heartbroken
Now that I finally realize
The words that you’ve spoken
Were really all lies

Sometimes Heartbroken
I’m dying inside
And I can’t seem to get over you
No matter how hard I tried

Sometimes Heartbroken
As I look back on this
I find that I’m no longer broken
As these words pass my lips

Sometimes Heartbroken


Details | Ballad | |

WITHOUT YOU

Without you
I'm a shell of a man
A lonely drifter
Who has no plan
Without you
Just bone and skin
Expressionless face
Replaced my grin
Without you

Without you
Nobody's home
The fire's gone out
Heart turned to stone
Without you
No up and down
What's right or wrong
I'm falling down
Without you

So I'm longing tonight
Wishing you were here
Down on my knees
Shaking.. full of fear
I'm calling out to God
Praying you might hear
Girl, I'd give anything
If you'd only come near

Without you
I'm a castle in the sand
The tide is coming in
I'm too weak to stand
Without you
I've lost my love song
Just meaningless days
All hope is gone
Without you

So I'm longing tonight
Wishing you were here
Down on my knees
Shaking.. full of fear
I'm calling out to God
Praying you might hear
Girl, I'd give anything
If you'd only come near

And just one chance is all I need
Unzipped heart, my soul's plead

Oh, I'm longing tonight
Wishing you were here
Down on my knees
Shaking.. full of fear
I'm calling out to God
Praying you might hear
Girl, I'd give anything
If you'd only come near

12-14-14


Details | Couplet | |

Created By Choices

Something evil this way comes
Sure as the rising of the Son

A single heart left to bleed
A lost soul with a dying need

When love proves it doesn’t care
In creeps darkness and despair

Angry voices from deep with-in
Scream I’m a fool once again

I now make my soul like a cave
It’s the darkness that I now crave

Around my heart I shall build a moat
With blood sacrifices unto the goat

Deep in darkness as a soul can be
Father of darkness come feed on me

She destroyed the love in my soul
I do pray that hate fills up the hole

Troubled souls with hallow voices
In this life we all make choices

My choices have left me degraded
I now hate the person I created

Into darkness away from the Son
Something evil this way comes


Yea, I posted this for Deborah's contest.
Believe it or not this is who i used to
be. Poetry is a truly amazing tool when
it comes to change, it transformed this
into the man I am. All I can say about
that, "Praise be the Power of God".


Details | Rhyme | |

JUST FORGIVE ME

Just forgive me, you'll see what I do
I'm sorry, going to make it up to you
Girl, I was so wrong to play a brat
Never deserve to be treated like that

I was a wild lion that had been caged
I lashed out, and now you're enraged
I'm out of the cage, I won't be a jerk
A second chance we can make it work

Like little children not ready for a war
Our innocence robbed, we need a door
If we walk through it, can be set free
There's a path beyond for you and me

Oh, I'm the sun and you are the river
Our hearts fearless and yet we quiver
When it's high noon.. We feel far away
But soon we'll touch at the melt of day

In the moonlight, I know that we will see
The thought of us is more than fantasy
Our love is real, it's not just in your head
I'm so lovesick girl, and you're my meds

Date: 9-16-14


Details | Free verse | |

The Day That Died Forever

When I am Colder,Older and then alone...
I will collect the sky on my own...
When the art has faded and the days then fade-
when everyone has gone away...

I may finally see what never was saw
.....ahhhhhhhhhhhhh............... the quiet sky

The unlit room which bares my end...shows the flashes of my pains my joys and sins.
This life has been a strange one since the curtains were drawn
These paper and plastic figures have clouded the dawn

I was once younger,foolish,and obsessed with truth
Now I am bitter,sour,dour faced with my heart under shoe

The children were all searching or lost in a crowd
All weeds in a garden...growing vile and foul

Though beauty was sold it never came true
Obsessions and vanity have traveled safe through

Materials and poison and everything lost
have been burned in the fires or lost in the frost

I stand face to mirror tearing my being apart
Winding thoughts of love,pain,god,and art

As the sun sets and the darkness grows
I too shall follow this pattern in tow

Death has a friendly hand and a pretty face
She has given me comfort as I leave this place

The wars have occurred,humanity's lost
Souls have been burnt in the fire or lost in the frost

Day was Life,Night is Death

And the latter has given counsel on my final steps


Details | Lyric | |

How Do You Make a Sick Heart Well?

Broken last night, 
 I woke up 
 Precious problem, 
 picking up 
 every part. 
I want to fix it.  
This  
I've tried to mend  
by shooting it into my vein, 
getting in and going, 
by another lover, 
carving the love into my skin, 
by sleeping away 
the black out.
Useless things are poison to the temple.
It’s either one cigarette after another, 
or lots of chocolate, 
the sad tale goes on and on. 
But the fragile heart is broken. 

What do I do?
They tell me to, 
Rely on Thee  
It's hard for me 
I can't see, 
Although I know  
and have been very close  before. 
I was expelled from Hell, thank God. 
Entered into the sunlight. 

While the whole world  
Is in agony. 
I'm feeling happy, 
my heart feels healed,
but this is a deception.... 
it is still broken. 
Just like a peculiar disease, 
there's no cure.

Fill it, 
and deal with all its cuts and bruises...
but then all you have are scars. .
My medicine for the bleeding within...
Is to await love to call me, 
and say that everything is ok. Not to despise my needs...

Inside, there is a little girl screaming. 
And some times...there's an old lady whispering 
that she is utterly tired, and can't bare it anymore. 

Do you shut the door on your heart? 
I can't seem to do it. 
It's too powerful and pure, 
this instrument that passionately pounds within me. 
All its pain... 
I have no control. 

Creatures 
Do you have a broken heart? 
Do you have a heart at all?  




Details | Lyric | |

A Dead Word

A dying word echoes your life
The past will come; the future will die
Faith will fall, just as you need
If light would rise, you’d make it disease

In this word everything fades
What you like; what you distaste
The dark becomes your flavour of truth
And in this world, hope is removed

A lonely word so sure to bring
A haunting pain that makes monsters sing
Where nothing comes because nothing is
The purest hate will spread from your bliss

And since the day you held that dead word
So close to heart, it’s all you have shared
You circle through the life that is death
Through rape and spells you steal what’s left

And since the day you held on too close
You kill yourself in each living host
And now you see the world is so clear
You twisted love when love was your fear


Details | Ballad | |

DANCE AMONG THE FLOWERS

Dance among the flowers
Let's have a party and a tea
Dreaming of the future, and
How I think that things should be
Life should be an adventure
A Prince should take me to the Ball
The wind always fills my sails
When I'm with him, gonna have it all

I dream out loud to make it clear
This little girl has no fear

Growing up is not easy
So much is not what it seems
No time to smell the roses
Or to think of childhood dreams
Life just becomes survival
My Prince was really a pauper too
My ship never left the harbor 
Happy days are all too few

My dreams long gone, nothing near
Grown up girl.. So many tears

Hide behind the surface
So you think that I am strong
Inside I'm falling to pieces
How could everything go wrong
Life can make you bitter
A shell of what you could be
Drowning out in the ocean
So far out that none can see

Prayed for a miracle, a new song
That a true Prince would come along

Met you the next morning
Your humor made me smile
The way you looked at me
I hoped you'd stay for awhile
You came a little closer
Then you gently took my hand
Words can't describe it all
Lost dreams were being fanned

You were my miracle, you were my song
All of those childhood dreams, They were inside all along

Dance among the flowers
Let's have a party and a tea
Dreaming of the future, and
How I think that things should be
Life should be an adventure
A Prince should take me to the Ball
The wind always fills my sails
When I'm with him, gonna have it all

I dream out loud to make it clear
This little girl has no fear

You were my miracle, you were my song
All of those childhood dreams,
They were inside all along


*This is the story of a little girl growing up with amazing dreams, only to be devastated by the harsh realities of life.  Then by chance, in her adult life,  she meets someone that restores her belief in dreams she thought were long gone.
12-16-14


Details | Free verse | |

Come Back To Me

The Ink Bottle sits, alone,
It’s only Companions,
The Feathered Pen,
The Paper Pad.

The Desk, once alive,
The Words,
No longer,
Written.

Love, abandon,
But wanting not,
The Freedom,
It has.

A Wooden Chair, dusty,
Reclines not,
For the Comfort,
Once given.

Time, a mystery gone,
With passing,
Never to be recovered,
Longing.

Days of gloom, waiting,
Shine not, The Light,
The Heart,
Once brightened.

Come back, to Me,
My words, of Joy,
Of Laughter,
Wisdom, once known.


Details | Free verse | |

Musical Torment - The Infamous Masterpieces

Torturing me with touches
I feel the sting of hardened and lasting lust
Touches not of mortal fingers,
But Halloween-haloed strings composed by musicians of mystery
Pressing upon my back--yes! A searing, yet melodi-errotic strike
All upon me, yet far from me...

Leave me not in the judgement of my own scrambling feelings
Rest not away as I hold my hands out in the dark
Deathly dances are visions heaven-bound for the duo--
Yet for the solo- a blank, useless measure...

The pulsing silence of amateur-stitched love rattles me
Making rhythms giggle in my mind
Intervals of idiocy tormenting all reason
Truly an agonizing, but for others--minor--prison
Is the smile that helped design those strings
Those strings that pluck upon my spine
Controlling me in a dark place stuck between tunes and time

Why are your hands so cold when you play those piano keys?
Why are your lungs so eroded with the pride that taints the songs you sing?
Why have the rhythms gone awry, and why does your apathetic dissonance thrive?

And tell me… through it all…
As you compose the rise and fall…
Why is all this destruction you created so vibrantly alive?


Details | Rhyme | |

If Only It Was Me

If only it was me who could win this race.
I stand so very proud with honor.
Along with you in my rightful place.

But I am but this man that you see.
Everything  but  him.
If only it was me.

A beggar ive become pride no longer does exist.
Counting seconds till my rejection.
With no escape  still the foolish heart does resist.

For we are but children when it comes to soul.
Love leaves us blind.
Failure turns the heart as dark and bitter as a piece 
of coal.

Head apon pillow waitting for what will be.
Tears from a helpless heart pour.
 The mind becomes a prison as i curse if it
were me.

For if it were me I would make it all
right.
Castaway doubt.
Erase every empty night.

My arms are open empty they do remain.
Reflecting apon every word.
As slowly I go insane.

But i do not wish for the sadness 
of being free.
Your love  is endless passion that cast such warmth.
A fool cries to the wind if only it were me.


Details | Rhyme | |

The Memory

In the garden she said goodbye.
A kiss filled with remorse.
Moonlit memories she asked to forget us 
as I promised to try.

Time and addictions.
A change in appearance.
Old vices and new  afflictions.

I found comfort with many
and refuge with none.
Life can be a tragic play.
As empty as the night as beautiful
as the setting sun.

Sometimes a vision becomes unclear.
Forgotten lovers guilty eyes.
Did we part under false terms or
simply fear.

A candle's light.
Glows softley and cuts
through the night.

Sanity is only a common state of mind.
To forget is not possible.
For it only takes a single song to remind.

I saw the pain in your eyes.
The sorrow did illuminate the darkness.
Moments   go unseen as this statue of a man cries.

I cannot give you my word that it will
be my best.
In that place so far away.
I belive I will never be able to fulfill your 
request,

I understand that which could never be.
Trapped in a prison  of a memory.


Details | Rhyme | |

Every Time We Fall

Every time we fall we lose a bit of  are selfs.
Untill hollow becomes the heart.
bare as a vacant stores shelves.

The dreamer finds solice in every new face.
That new love's illusion.
Cold is the afterglow when we reflect apon that 
once passionet embrace.

Can the bitter heart find a reason to try?
Skipping stones alone across dark water.
We keep setting are selves  up without 
a single question as to why.

A room smoke filled yet every thing shows 
clear.
Sometimes  we play the cards.
And hold the best one aside in fear.

As vast as the ocean  from its shores 
the  the innocent crawl.
Trying to capture only a glimmer of that true passion.
Every time we fall.


Details | Blank verse | |

Living Hell

His back is turned to her.
Head bowed, shoulders slumped-
Ears muted to her stinging words-
Heart numbed from excess abuse.
Though once addicted to it, to her.

Her flaying arms and forced tears.
Bitterness flowing from her petite frame.
Ripping through the air-
The target of her hatred
Once fueled her passions and desires.

Promises of forever made forever ago.
Held near and dear in thoughts and actions.
Tarnished and crumbled, fell through the cracks.
Vicious, selfish decisions
Scorching all sense of heaven on earth.

Two having been made into one.
A union blessed on high
Now has caused heaven's angels to cry.
Hell not for lost souls or the damned
Exsistence without love, truest living hell.


Details | Rhyme | |

A Golden Steed Gallops

A Golden Steed Gallops


A golden steed gallops in my dreams as of late
 echoing sounds of my so darkly imagined fate
 chastising my wicked deeds of an ill-spent youth
 increasing the chasm between bold lies and truth

Flowing trails of gleaming pain fly deep with that race
 as precious , sweet memories burn up without a trace
 flying away , names and faces of girls I so easily left
broken up like fine crystals falling from a high shelf

An invisible rider brings racing steed to an abrupt halt
 as it screams out, yes , you, it's all your damn fault!
 why did you not live a sweeter, kinder and gentler life
 blame is on you for lost true love , loss of your first wife!

Golden steed stands at a graveyard filled with no headstones 
 lying about are several sun-bleached and broken white bones
 dark wind races in whispering in a very raspy low moan
 you are so dead , now you lay cold, dark and so, so alone!

Robert Lindley  06-13-2014

Based upon a poem I wrote in the early 80's. 
That poem was  written about a dream I had 
three times in three consecutive years, each 
time was on my first (ex) wife's birthday, we had 
been divorced for 7 years..


Details | Free verse | |

Struggle

Primal, basal, beyond my awareness
How could I have been so careless
I let the line between real and fantasy
Become clouded through my jealousy
The fire rose, consumed, burned away
And left the ashes in its wake
I still search for just one burning ember
To reawaken feelings of forever
But destruction is all around
I fall to my knees, hit the ground

Can you hear me scream?

Blatant, cold, and calculating
Every part of this wrapped up in hating
The one who did this thing to me
Imprisoned when I was set free
The water rises, to wash away
All the promises we once made
If still one ember ever burned
It burns no more, lesson learned
Still destruction is all around
And I can’t lift myself from off the ground

Can you see me cry?

Detached, impartial, contemplating
Why am I here, why am I waiting
Just what am I waiting for
A broken window, an open door
A key to tell me who I am
So I can learn to live again
Without the fear, without regret
To bring back balance and pay the debt
To clear debris from hallowed ground
Unchained, but broken, I am bound

Can you feel my battle?


Details | Free verse | |

IF EVER BECKONED BY THE BROKEN GLASS

If ever beckoned by the broken glass
I offer instantly these scarred hands
And bleed
	Embracing sharpest, cruel edges,
	most exquisite lines
And bleed
	upon piercing, jagged, penetrating points
	brilliant with dancing sunlight
And bleed
	poured out into a universe benign, hard surfaces
	warm in crimson puddles of all I was 
And stand
And bleed
And know then –
Broken glass does not love back.


Details | Quatrain | |

nailed down

i took the nails, and the cat too.
the hammer, the sink and the bed.
i burned them all.  except the cat.
cos she loved me much more than the one i wed.


Details | Dramatic Verse (Verse Drama) | |

I kissed another girl

(This is a fictional poem)

When I kissed another girl, word got back to you.
You slapped my face and told me that we're through.
Most kisses taste pretty sweet but that kiss was tart.
Now I'm all alone nursing a broken heart.
Kissing that girl was foolish and it was a mistake.
But I'll make it up to you no matter how long it takes.
I can't go on if our love is at an end.
If you'll take me back, I'll never look at another woman again.
You're the only woman who I want to be with.
So I'm on my knees begging you to forgive.


Details | Narrative | |

The Phone

The phone rings empty into the night.
Filling a void that brings strange comfort
to thoose around.

Rage eats away untill it bores a hole
straight through are hearts.
Whiskey cauterizes the wound.

Alone with fools we gather.
The bitter ones taking to there barstools.
the weak look to punish thoose happy
bastards.
Who dare to feel anything in the place of  
emptyness.

She left so many years befor.
At least her mortal soul did.
I rememeber when it was when I still
dared to dream.

Long befor reallity was a friend.
Lovers lie.
Motions keep us living.

She spoke but the words were empty as her heart.
So as strangers we parted just as we met.
With a bitter taste I never did reply.

The phone rang it's last time.
I herd it echo farewell down the hall.

I had to go so I never unlocked the door.
i just left my emotions hanging  like some
forgotten coat pushed back in
the closet.

Its been almost a year since that phone filled
the emptyness of my soul.
If only I had answered.


Details | Rhyme | |

Love From Afar

Strange creature and my best friend.
The distance between us is great.
So why do we pretend.

You cross the street as I head to the bar
I'll drink to you my dear.
For if I cant hold you close.
I'll just love you from afar.

Like crumbs tossed to a pigeon from a delicate 
hand.
I'll wait like a fool.
For my heart is forever yours to command.

You say I cause pain when you remember the past.
Bitter tears erase the passion.
That sometimes isnt ment to last.

Sometimes it's easier to forget then remember 
who we are.
if it bothers you to keep me close.
Then I'll love you from afar.

Standing underneath your window in the pouring 
rain.
Times alone often i do reflect.
Love has a way of making the normal seem insane.

So very close never knowing who we truley are.
Taken from my heart.
left only to love  from afar.


Details | Rhyme | |

Suffering

One day I will look up to the sky and say
“God, I wish him well…”
But until that day, I’m buried here
Inside my living hell

Eventually, I’ll move past the pain
With a story left to tell
But right now, I am suffering
Once, I knew him very well

There will be no goodbye this time
It just simply has to end
There is no making up for lying
You should not betray a friend

The hardest thing I’ve ever had to do
Was through choked tears say
“I don’t love you….”
I didn’t have to be this way

Someday I know I will forgive
For forgiveness sets us free
And on that day I’ll truly live
Without regrets of broken dreams

But for now, I’ll remain silent
In quiet, dark despair
With the echoing reminders
Of a voice that didn’t care


Details | I do not know? | |

The Affair

your eyes go
tap
tap
tap on my eyes
your finger spangles to the same tune
curling back down to the others
freeing your lip
teasing my pitter-patter

I stand naked
being ruled by whispers
standing naked
life having jumped from dream
to insomnia
life having jumped from side glances and smiles
to stopping light from leaking out doors

tap
the 3 AM window 
tap
all to pitter-patter goes my heart
tap
a Cheshire Cat grinning
tap
a smoking gun


Details | Rhyme | |

ADRIFT

Alone for for now driffting apon the sea.
You stayed at the shore.
Cause you never found comfort  in someone like me.

The sunset is empty when your alone.
Worthless is the kingdom.
When no one is willing to share the 
throne.

I was your clown when in shadows I always 
found a way to make your spirts lift.
Ive lost all since of direction.
Since you set me adrift.


Was it only a moment something I cold not see.
the heart bleeds still.
From this prison called a memory.

The storm doesnt effect me out here.
Its not death.
But isolation I fear.

The wind is my only friend the ocean my home.
Searching for that which I cannot have.
On this endless quest I roam.

Drawing a heart inside your hand as
 through the sand you sift.
From the comfort of the shore I wonder
do you  recall.
Are love you set adrift. 


Details | Lyric | |

Edge of Love

Bring on what awakens
It falls under what I’ll lose
And so it goes on sleeping
Under a queen I will refuse

Face what she calls perfect
It got there through her pain
And so it circles back to nothing
Where every face becomes the same

Calmness and reflection
It gets me high on life
But then I find where this is leading
When I become her darling knight

I’ll screw her just to prove it
I’ll throw away my mind
And when I find she’s non-existent
I’ll spread her poison through a rhyme

So lovely in completion
So pointless to deny
If self-hate did not believe me
I’d give it all another try


Details | Rhyme | |

Evergreen

So stay the gold.
foolish thoughts wasted 
apon the old.

Your never alone except day and night.
did we forget the cause.
Or just grow tired of the fight.

Evergreen moments dont exist in books.
Or pictures trapped apon the page.
The wisdom of life is nothing without the rage.
 
Into a maze we go blind.
Far past  the moment.
Nothing is left to remind.


Motions are not feelings. 
Along with contracts and lies.
So many loser's  with there double dealings.

Taken from the city lights
I lost all that was obscene.
My pasion was turned into my evergreen.

Time you change all but me.
Casting many storms.
That turn  so very deep  within the sea.

Erased are thoose moments
apon the slate  is clean.
I wonder do you ever reflect my sweet evergreen.


Details | Rhyme | |

No Answer

 I try not to do it, but still I pick up the phone
 Then I dial the number I've known far too long
 And though it hurts to do it, I wait to hear the voice
 That never really answers, and I forget I had the choice
 Of course he knows who's calling, but he already forgot to care
 About everything he ever said, and everything we shared
 So I fell too hard this time, but really didn't I know
 When I said it was over, he'd so easily let me go


Details | Free verse | |

SUMMON NEW DAYS

One hundred percent empty mentality 
Endorsed by fake friends 
For a fun fuck, they begin to suck me dry 
Desensitized with fraud in their eyes 

No wrench. No hammer. Not even a knife. 
No mental weapons to end my own life. 
Try to be one, the same once again, 
But my own psyche only leads to dead ends. 
Knowing old ways bring back these bad days. 
A mind forever lost – emptiness stays. 

So fuck the real life I'll never get back, 
And fuck the fake friends that fall through the cracks. 
Experience life lost and the love that it cost. 
Never again given any trust 
Hung on a cross 
Without  her to stay 
Time now to wake & face this bad day. 

~END~
Written By Joel R. Thornton 2005


Details | Iambic Pentameter | |

AFTER YOU

I saw a light from across the field
On a night the sky shed tears of rain.
I had hoped the dark would help to shield
My heart from sorrow it need not feign.
To the burden of truth I must yield
And with truth the burden I might explain.

The light shone on, then it was put out –
It’s glow prematurely extinguished.
Gloom filled the void and then cast about,
It engaged me and I was anguished.
Morning found my spirit easy to flout,
And all that morning I so languished.


Details | Lyric | |

While You Sleep

While you sleep I tell you all of the things I keep inside throughout day.
Now that you can hear but not listen I find them much easier to say.
My hopes, my dreams, my fears, and everything in between
Your subconscious hears so keen, or so it seems.
My tongue is soft; I speak so sweetly 
Knowing your reaction will never greet me.

Tonight will be different in what I want you to know.
It has everything to do with what I can’t help but show.
I hold no claim to any religion but you’ve given me a place for my faith.
Somewhere it will never stale or lose its lavish taste.
You’ve shown me something I can see, touch, and feel, 
And so before it I choose to kneel.

I know I don’t say it but I miss you every day.
Sitting, thinking of the perfect words to be my choice,
Yet when you call I can’t find any of the right words to say.
I’m just happy to finally hear your voice.
Even just a moment is enough to sooth my heavy heart;
Fearing the ends of conversations knowing we’ll have to part.

I’ll never be too far from you, always within arm’s reach,
And in your days of darkness I’ll be the light that you will seek.
I’ll never let you leave too far from me, I’ll stay close behind you in this world;
Secretly protecting what is mine, you will always be my girl.
I only want the best for you so the best of me I will employ.
Faithfully yours, I will always be your boy.

I close my eyes and kiss your soft sweet lips
And see the very best of you in loving bliss.
I see past the physical which makes you attractive
And focus on the things I can’t see in which I’m attracted.
Your thoughts I’d love to hear them all.
Of the things you speak disinterest never makes its call.

My day will come, I know someday I’ll be the only one.
And you I will pursue viciously,
Because I’ve given you the greatest gift I can give, to love unconditionally.
Yes our day will come, I know someday we’ll be as one.
And you I will pursue viciously,
Because I’ve given you the greatest gift I can give… to love unconditionally.


Details | Marsiya | |

I'm my Daddy Made Over

Dedicated to my Dad Jerry W. Niday 3/20/1952 - 6/18/2013


I am who I am because of him
He’s the reason for my son’s name
He gave me my courage & my strength
To stand tall even when standing wasn’t easy
Stand for the ones who can’t
To think and fend for myself
I’m my Daddy made over

Taught me to fight back 
To never back down
How to pick myself back up
When I’ve been knocked down
Fight for what I believe
I’m my Daddy made over

He gave me my stubbornness 
Gave me my pride
Gave me my temper
Taught me not to take crap
To speak my mind no matter who
Work for what I want
I’m my Daddy made over

How to keep my emotions in check
How to handle large amounts of pain
When in trouble he always had my back
He knew how my mind worked better than anyone
I got it from him
I’m my Daddy made over

Even though he’s gone
I’ll stand and continue on 
I may stumble I may fall 
May even get hurt along the way
But I’ll pick myself back up
I’ll dust myself off and stand tall
I’m honored and proud to say
I’m my Daddy made over


Sabrina Niday Hansel



Details | Iambic Pentameter | |

My Own Little Mystery

I think it was your eyes, they are to me,

So beautiful, serene, a perfect dream.
 

Wound up, flustered, lost, amazed and alive.

More so than anyone could imagine to be.
 

With your skin of copper, that tastes so sweet,

Along you hips, for your sweet ecstasy.
 

Blinded by my own hidden reveries,

What it is that gets me, I still can't see.
 

I know you've been hurt, I hear your plea,

Open your heart and give me the key.
 

I don't know what they say or do or see,

But I promise, they don't get you like me.
 

See, sometimes your body makes me wonder,

About how perfect you feel against me...


Details | Ballade | |

Being you

Being you

Accept yourself
That’s all that I can say
Let your inner voice tell you
The way to live your day
Do not be hard upon yourself
That never did no good
Just be happy, never worry
It’s foolish that one should.

Love yourself
Cause you’re a ‘one off’ too
No one else can play your part
Nobody can be you
It’s a lovely world we live in
Let it seep into your soul
Then when you feel at one with life
Twill get you feeling whole.

Most people call me crazy
But I love being me
I do not care what others think
I only like to be
To be this way, it is my right
A gift sent down by fate
I’m so I’m happy being me
Each day to me is great.

14 August 2013 @ 1410hrs.



Details | Elegy | |

I Need Your Help Daddy

I’m tired
I’m Physically and Emotionally tired
I don’t want to be the strong one anymore
I can’t this time
I don’t know what to do Daddy
I need your help down here

I can’t get back in control of my emotions 
I’m having a hard time dealing with your absence
I’m having a hard time standing by myself
I need your help Daddy

I’m broken and lost without you Daddy
I need your will to want to carry on
I need your strength to over come this
I need your strength to stay standing
Your courage to fight back again
I need your help 

Please Daddy I’m at a loss
How am I suppose to do this
I need your guidance 
I need you to guide me back
To whom I was before
I need your help Daddy
I need your help







Details | Lyric | |

CANDLE 1st in Spanish then scroll down for english trans

VELA (CANDLE)First Spanish version, scroll down for English)
Yo ser‚ para ti.
Toda la vida que me queda la vivir‚ para ti
y cuando el tiempo haya terminado,
morir‚ por ti.
Dir‚ tu nombre
en cada vela que encienda, respirar‚ tu nombre.
Te susurrar‚,
cada oraci¢n que diga ser  siempre parte de ti.

Por toda la eternidad,
y as¡ ha sido y ser  siempre, 
y cuando deje este mundo,
aquello vendr  conmigo
en la luz de una vela.
Todo el mundo sigue girando, haciendo el d¡a y la noche,
y de la oscuridad a la luz,
ser s siempre parte de cada oraci¢n que yo diga.

Yo ser‚ para ti.
Como una fresca quebrada de la monta¤a que se desborda por ti
como una c lida brisa de verano
entre los  rboles para ti.
En el brillo de una vela,
todo lo que he sido o llegue a ser 
por toda la eternidad,
tu ser s parte de todo lo que yo haga siempre.
Yo ser‚ para ti.  

					
					Traducci¢n: Emilio J. Saavedra M.     CANDLE	
I will be for you.
All my life that is left, I will live for you,
and when time has run out,
I will die for you.
I will speak your name
in each candle that I light, I will breath your name.
I will whisper you,
every prayer I ever say will be part of you.

For eternity,
and forever it has been, and will always be,
and when I leave this world,
it will go with me.
In a candle light
all the world keeps on turning, making day and night,
and from dark to light,
you'll be part of every prayer that ever comes from me.

I will be for you.
Like a cool mountain spring that overflows for you
like a warm summer breeze 
through the trees for you.
In a candle glow,
everything I've ever been or will ever be
for eternity,
you'll be part of everything I ever do.
I will be for you.
© Ron Wilson aka Vee Bdosa the doylestown poet


Details | Free verse | |

It Can't Be Real

A truth in rage of insult furrows my mind
For it is only an offense given to me by myself
In the mouths of others far innocent than I
I feel the tears trickle down my cheeks
For I have surfaced into an ugly mistake
I am always inadequate in this brain
I try to shine like the advice of grace given
But confidence rarely rears its head my way
There’s a sort of shade blocking its way
A shade that darkens everyday

That very shade led me to believe my feelings are wrong
That I will never belong so long as they are not controlled
I must be careful—for the lines of love and lust run cold
I hate myself truly this night
And no one but myself will give me the right
The very right to degrade my every being
Because you are not seeing what I am seeing

There is no point
My lines run cold
Can I be so bold as to say
I still love with a pang of indistinguishable doubt 
All feelings enter in
As my truth blurs and checks out

Your words pierce me so deep
I cannot describe the pain I feel
God it hurts so bad
It can’t be real

Much like the love I have come to embrace
The very love that links to your face
Tears don’t give it justice

It can’t be real
Much like the love I will never face


Details | Double Dactyl | |

Beyond Your End

 BEYOND YOUR END
Look deep into yourself my friend,
if then, you need to look to me, 
and deep enough to see the end,
beyond your end is where I'll be.

Into the love someday you'll see,
becoming all the things you'll know,
before your very eyes, I'll be
already where you want to go.

I'll be your long and blinding light,
of which all life is awed,
the thread that reaches through the night
in search of what is God.

And in a while, if love is right,
and hope is not just more pretend,
though you have sought what e'er you might,
'tis me you'll find, beyond your end.

And I will love your death away,
removing from your mind
what'er your death might seem to be,
with love impossible to find.
Û  © RON WILSON aka vee bdosa


Details | Free verse | |

Shower of Tears

It begins with prayer
as I kneel
in my morning shower,
first thanking God
for all the blessings
He has given to me,
then I start
listing those
dear to me.

I think of you,
how much I love you,
and your needs,
I ask for strength and healing,
ask for forgiveness
if I have done anything
to hurt you
and tell God
how I need you.

It’s then that
the tears start to flow
as I let Him know
how very important
you are to me,
why I feel helpless many times
and am unable to help you.

As I try to speak,
my tears are coming down
like the water
in the shower,
soon I can’t even
see or speak.

All I am now
is a crying man,
wanting God to help me,
to help you, to heal you,
to show me how
to be your strong Knight,
instead of someone
just full of tears.

Even if He allows us to stay together
sometime in the future,
I know at times
I will be nothing
but a crying man.

Crying tears of Joy
when you are here,
crying tears of Woe
when you are not.

As you have been here recently
I am doing both right now
and love you too much
to ever stop completely.

My Lady Susan,
this Knight is forever yours
and will never leave your side…
may God continue
to have mercy on us both.

2010


Details | Narrative | |

Bottled Up

Summer of '99

How ironic. There I was, waking to a magnificent kaleidoscopic sky 
and I had no one to share it with. I thought you'd be there but I knew 
that it was too good to have lasted. It was too perfect--
you were too perfect, all the way down to your cheesy pick up
line... "Steamy Summer Love" indeed...

But what is steam anyway? I guess the love that we shared
that summer literally evaporated. All at the heat of the moment.
How cliched. But it sure burned me, now I realize how true it is 
that steam is way much hotter than boiling water. 
Was it all a dream? I tend to think so, but then 
I finger the bracelet around my wrist, 
and realize it was true after all.
 Breath on breath. Skin to skin. Heartbeat to heartbeat.
Soul to soul? I thought so.

I've come back here, to this same spot where we were a year ago,
just for me to let go.
 Literally bottling up everything... 
this write goes in this bottle, as well as some sand here 
and your joke of a bracelet.
I'm tossing this out to sea, because that's where it belongs--
those memories to be swallowed up. 
Passion purged 
by angry waves...

Was it a fantasy? Maybe, but then I hold him close to me
and realize it wasn't. I named him Nicholas, you know.
See, I remembered your name.


---------****-------------------------****-------------------------------

Summer of 2008

I've come back to this place to mull over something rotten
 I did a decade ago. And remember-- that gorgeous face, 
those mesmerizing eyes and smile... that amazing spirit. 
And hit myself on why I was such a fool. 

Then I see this bottle, and in it is some sort of letter, 
and what is this? A bracelet? An all too familiar one--
holding it in my palm, I get a chill not brought on by the sea breeze.
Reading the note, I burn up, ashen.
I then weep till my eyes and soul feel like dying.

I have a son.
and her name has escaped my memory. 



** July 18 2010r06262012


Details | Ballad | |

Never Told You

Tired of talking 
‘bout weather
Other trivial things

Tired of talking 
‘bout food
The price of tangerines

You may outlive
This aging man
Before I go
Please understand

Never told you how 
I love you 
When I held you
In the dark

Never told you how
I love you
I was never
Very smart

I never told you how
I love you
When I kissed your 
Baby face

Never told you how
I love you 
And I pray it’s 
Not too late

I would  tell you, 
“That’s what men do…manly men don’t say,  ‘I love you’”
That was my alibi
But what men do should be corrected
What men do can’t be accepted 
If it makes your woman cry

Tired of talking 
‘bout scandals
Rumors of the day

Tired of talking 
‘bout old mistakes
Who deserves the blame?

The Winter of our lives
Is drawing near
Let’s change it to Spring
From year to year

Now I’m telling you 
I love you
Though the words are coming late

I’m telling you
I love you
And it feels so good to say

I’ll love you in the morning         
Love you through the night
I will love you through the tears
And all the tragedies of life

I’ll stay with you forever
Love you every day
Love you,  love you, love you
It feels so good to say

Love you, love you, love you, baby

Feels so good to say…..

Love



Details | Ballad | |

Poem of heartbreak

Here I am, laying on my bed
Silently crying while I read
About the things I left unsaid
And all my tears being shed

Did you know, you broke my heart
When you left, when we were apart
But the things that you told me
Right before you said you'd flea

All I have left is the memory
Of your last words, said in glory
"I think we need a break"
And so now I'm left awake

Here I am, laying on my bed
My depression being fed
By my own record player
Only adding sadness, layer after layer

Your last words, are those on repeat
That's what I wish to delete
The image of you running off
Just thinking you were tough

The thought that's destroying my mind
Nor confirmed or denied
"Did I do something wrong"
My friends told me I was strong

I have managed to smile everyday
Even though I see the world in grey
I miss you badly
Pretending to be happy, sadly

I can't see you clearly in photos
My emptiness grows
If you were here,I could've touched you
But then again, was our love ever true

So is it wrong for me to want a kiss
On the lips that I dearly miss
Not just from anyone
Just the one who left and run


Details | Rhyme | |

The Battle Within

A constant battle rages between my heart and mind.
The stress of my decision the devil himself must have assigned.
"Your health and sanity are in jeopardy" screams my brain.
"Don't dare let him go" shrieks my heart in agonizing pain.  

My heart says:
"He's the one for you, you never felt this way before
You ache when away from him, he's the one that you adore.
Be patient with him for in time he will change his ways
Just remember the good times and how he sets your senses ablaze."

My brain says:
"In the years that you have known him, you haven't seen a change.
He's still insecure and jealous, doesn't that seem a little strange.
He believes what he wants to believe and thinks you are a liar.
You let your self become a target and he does not hesitate to fire." 

My heart says: 
"He's been through a lot, just show him the strength of your love.
One day he realize you stood by him when push came to shove.
What if he is my soul-mate.......is that not worth the fight?
Just follow me, 'your heart' and everything will be all right."

My brain says:
"There should be no shoving, insane questioning and childish games.
He would never hurt you and make you cry if he loves you like he claims.
No matter how much you reassure him, he can't seem to get past his issues
He acts like your judge and jury, you'll be forever crying in wad of tissues. 
 
My heart says:
"But don't you see, I'll be crying anyway, I will be broken and beyond repair.
I promised him that I would never let him go, to give up on love seems so unfair.
People search all their lives for that one special person, I truly believe he's mine!
If we can get beyond this madness I know we can once again be on cloud nine."

My brain says:
"Then buck up, stop your tears and for my sanity don't take any more crap.
You're too damn soft hearted, stop letting yourself fall into a turbulent emotional trap.
Life is too short to be unhappy even for a day, I know on this point we both agree.
Just continue to give your all and try your best......... what will be, will be!


"Sometimes it lasts in love but sometimes it hurts instead." ~Adele~


Details | Dramatic monologue | |

SILENT PLEA

Words badly spoken
Shout - by - shout - by - shout
Let anger be spoken
Let all people around see and hear
Was that all you can do?!!!!

My heart pounding fast
Beating strong and hard
As if any moment I will burst
Sweats unstoppable running low

My fingers starts to shake
Each breath a shallow deep ones
Each glance a hidden plea
Each step carried with the heaviest gold

I want to speak but I can not
I am stunned
I am stripped
I am foot glued
I am hurting
Deep and open

I want to utter something
But I can not
Afraid to say something wrong
Scare to be put on fault
I am tired explaining
so tired...
so exhausted in a way even...

I run. 
run
keep on running
and there as I stop
Tears flow....

by
olive_eloi
03/13/2014


Details | Free verse | |

Battling Addiction

Sitting on the easel of life
a portrait of a man
so much in love with that
to tempt the mood,
a need to caress his wanton spirit
when becoming a spent part of life’s toxic waste,
his need to step off the world
to escape its inhabitants
from choking him to death.
Yet somehow somewhere deep within
his sunken soul a desire,
to carve out a memorial in poetry
with words now strange to him,
but words they were of love
words of flowers, sunshine and simple things like that.
Yet his battle against his poison
was arduous and on the wane,
when suddenly amongst a throng of internet poets
an angel appeared,
one to care, when magically she began
to chase away the need,
when painting a different picture of the world
one he once knew when that he was of a child,
one he needed to be able to reach out to,
When across virtual reality many words of love, tenderness
sincerity, words of understanding and purpose.
Yet with an abruptness she gave him a choice
“Lie down my friend” She said “Defeated and die”
Or rise everyday with the perpetual sunrise and live,
give something of yourself, anything to help those
going down the same road, your road to despair,
you can build on that, with your love your understanding
and with it your body your mind your soul will be cleansed!


Details | Rhyme | |

Love Blind Duo-rhyme

I used to clearly see your face
But now you’re gone; as if erased,
Misplaced, or hid, or left behind,
Or lost somewhere inside my mind
I want you back; my heart is twined -
A Celtic knot I can’t unwind 
That aches your loss; I feel consigned
To memory’s unfair design
How can I love you, yet be blind?
You’re still a blank, still undefined
I keep on searching, frantic paced
I need to fill this empty space…


7/11/12


Details | Free verse | |

Bright Mistress

Soft hair blows across her face.
A sheen on excited skin emanates.
Bottomless eyes reflect attraction.

Immeasureable beauty pulls his attentions.
No equal can be found in any race.
Rowdy laughter never showed such grace.

No attempt to veil love's
drunkenness passes between them.
Childlike innocence is reborn.

Bonds of affection grow with each word.
Distance does not diminish emotional ties.
Smiles cannot be beaten from the faces of lovers.

And yet loneliness creeps behind her.
Parting lets in the pain and emptiness.
She must caress herself to sleep.

He does not lie beside her in the morning.
The memories of his kind voice ring
throughout her scattered thoughts.

When will this illicit love be sanctified?
Recognized by official decree?
Will God grant union to wayward love?







Details | Free verse | |

Emotional Turbulence

The voices grow louder, Intensifying with emotion, anger lining every aggressive word. My insides squeeze tighter as the vitriol poisons my mind, How does such hostility exist? As the sound of hatred deepens, The feelings strengthen their grip, like a vice, So tight, I can no longer breathe All the negative emotions I have ever felt, fill me, Threatening to overflow. So long have they been banished… Enough. No more! My mouth opens, An earsplitting scream of pain and suffering shatters the silence, Sobs of sorrow and grief wrack my body, Murderous shrieks of anger and hate, Wretched cries of self-pity and self-loathing, Poison the air. Now, free of these emotions. But the monster still exists Within the dark depths of my mind.


Details | Rhyme | |

In Twenty Four Hours

In twenty four hours life can drastically change.....

One moment blissfully happy walking on cloud nine
Thinking life is beautiful and wonderful, oh so divine
Then something happens that fills you with despair
Feels like you have been sent to hell without a prayer

Maybe doctors tells you have some incurable disease
Up to the heavens you look, reciting desperate pleas
Or you have cancer and you must battle for your life
It is like being stabbed in the gut with an invisible knife

You find out the one you adore, no longer loves you
The life your shared together is suddenly bid adieu 
Or you lose a loved one, death causes so much pain
Barely holding self together, trying not to go insane

In twenty four hours life can drastically change.....

One moment living a life filled with sorrow and strife
Questioning your fate and the purpose of your life
Then somethings happens that fills you full of hope
A glimmer of an incline instead of a downward slope 

Your disease is treatable, quality of life still intact
You decide to fight with all you got, stop being attacked
Your cancer has gone into remission, life is yours once more 
You promise to live each moment fully, like you never did before

A person enters your life and shows you what love truly is about
This special love will last forever, this you know without a doubt
A newborn enters your life whom you cherish and adore
The unconditional love of a child, no one could ask for more.

In twenty four hours life can drastically change.....

It's how you chose to deal with life curves is what really matters
Try to be positive and not let negative thoughts rip you into shatters
Find the courage and the strength to face each day anew
Everyone has hurdles that their trying to live through

Their is always someone that is far worse off than you
Let family and friends help hold you together like glue
Remember you matter to those that hold you dear
Have faith and hope, don't let yourself succumb in fear

Don't dwell on yesterdays sorrows, for you can't change the past
Tomorrow is beyond our control and comes without being asked
Live for today and deal with each battle as they come
For your life is the last thing you should abstain from!


Details | Haiku | |

Silence

Silence can deceive                                        
One's quiet to understand
Another to destroy


Details | Imagism | |

Guilty Reflection

Looking dead at me in this smeared mirror...
a lost man
tormented
face red
brittle
and teared

stacking excuses 
the longer I stare
this stress abuses 
my conscience with a glare

a guilty reflection warns
my mind is the prison I fear
as I long to escape 
from the  hell I dwell in
right here

who have I become? 
what have I done right?
crossroads appear suddenly 
as fog fills the mirror tonight

darkness owning the room,
prefers I suffer slow
so I proceed with speed 
because it’s the only way I know

tasteless stories
flood my life’s hard bound chapters 
while this smeared mirror reflects tears
dripping from a face 
which was once filled with laughter. 


Details | Free verse | |

Lost Humanity

Time comes and goes
People pass by and fly
We have only memories left
But we remember the sad ones
And easily forget the happy ones
We live in regrets
Saying... what if?
We live in fear
Saying... what will?
We have lost our humanity
We live in the past
Forgetting the present
As if there is only the past tense
We live in memories
Forgetting the future
As if there is no future
We love to brag about our ancestors
But what have we done now?
We all are losing ourselves
War... Drugs...
We think we are fighting for a cause
But that cause is only our greed
We think we are building the future
But we are destroying the future
We are losing our humanity 
And there is little left of it...
It is time to stop the war
And move along with peace
Nations send armies to others
Saying:"We've come to civilize you"
According to the dictionary 
Civilize is defined as conqueror
Send not armies! Send food and medical supplies!
Why do you come in the name of peace?!
If you only bring with you destruction!
What is happening to Afghanistan?
Why do you send guns instead of pills!?!
Or is the Vito more important than lives?
I am not from Europe, I am not from America
and I am NOT from the Middle East...
I do not know such things...
I am from Earth, regard of my nation
Nations are only names, we are all one
We are connected; we live on the same planet!
Why does one want to kill his brother?
IS IT FUN? WHY DOESN'T EVERYONE TRY IT?
I do not want to lose my humanity
Knowing that little is left in this world
This world can yet be fixed...
And it starts with two words: Love and equality
And it starts with one road: kill the Vito
Cause if it was a man, I would've killed it for the best
You think Hitler is gone?! Well now there is a stronger one
Look at Jerusalem! Hitler wouldn't dare do such things!
Why do we keep looking at the past?!
Forgetting what now is happening!
If the same ones who were massacred by Hitler
Are the same ones doing worse to Arabs?!
Why do we spend billions on weapons?
Instead of spending them on science?
Or at least save other nations from starvation
Why are we better than the Africans?
We have the same God! Or is it because of their color?
I just wish to ask one question to every human being...
WHAT WILL YOU SAY WHEN YOU STAND BEFORE GOD?

--------------------------

A tribute to all nations and hope all be safe :)


Details | Free verse | |

LOVE, OR A FECKLESS FACSIMILE OF IT

My love for you, is like a tender blossom
awakening to the kiss of the sun.
My love is a moth venturing into the dark of the night
My love for you, is like a virgin bride
awaiting the tentative call of her groom.
My love is a sticky web spun swiftly by a black widow
My love for you, is like a little brook
trickling along its merry way.
My love, a cotton-mouth twirling seductively in the mating jig

Your love for me is drowning in the fumes of pure desire
A single folly only i will ever dare to remember
Mine is like the burning flame atop Mount Olympia
Dying, like the glowing embers of sinful Gomorrah

My love for you is rekindled by the supple lips
borne hither on the breath of your Zephyr
My love has sailed like a lost vessel in unchartered waters
My passion like a phoenix will rise from the ashes
your disdain the anchor on its glory
It is a fallen tree, the crimson core of my fading essence.


Didi... xoxo


Details | Sonnet | |

Stepping from the darkness of alone

I must carry this torch down to the cave
To shed light upon the walls of my heart
For, if not, I will take it to my grave
And on that path may make an early start

I cannot think of love, when love is what
Consumes my every thought in every hour
I gambled all I have and took my shot
Chanced my wretched life to fate’s cruel power

But love is what I deeply need to give
My life is not my own unless it’s shared
This aching heart with which I have to live
Must find his mate if he’s to be repaired

But first I must let go the one I crave
And leave this burning torch within the cave ~


Details | Heroic Couplets | |

Stronger Than She Thinks.....

She is a loving mother, 
 her pain is like no other.
Kids taken all at once away.
 A price too steep to have to pay.

Holds her head up high, 
 when all she wants to do is die.
She thinks her pain is masked, 
 but as you see, its no easy task.

She's strong and still fights, 
 even when they say she has no rights.
She dreams of seeing her kids, 
 trying hard to keep the pain hid.

She goes to court and really fights, 
 only to come home alone and cry at night.
Still, she continues this uphill battle.
 Her confidence, they constantly rattle.

Goes to work and tries to smile, 
 as her heart is breaking all the while.
Wish I was a much better sister, 
 who called and let her know I missed her.

I had my own tumultuous issues, 
 it was she who really needed the tissues.
I just had a crappy, low life man.
 By her side her family should stand.

Instead they all give her grief.
 Do they not see her pain will never be brief?
No, they all say they are sorry, but they're full of lies.
 Didn't they know it was her LIFE in demise?

A better sister, I'll try to be.
 Her back she never turned to me.
I hope she knows she's loved and cared for.
 Her smile I'd like to see more.

I know that's no easy task.
 But that I will still ask.
As they push her to the brink,
 She's stronger than she ever thinks.




A combined effort for Kristy.....


Details | Rhyme | |

blood transfusion



Details | Free verse | |

I Once Loved the Sun

In those younger years
I made a friend of the sun
And allowed her to bathe me
In brown creamy skin

In those younger years
I ran across a beach
And played with the sun
Let her sprinkle freckles
Upon my healthy golden cheeks

In those younger years
I had my way 
With the sun
Took her in so many 
Different positions
Under the burn of her sultry touch

In those younger years
I  traveled to exotic climes
Just to enter my sunshine heaven
And soak up her glow

But the cave I now inhabit
Shuts out all the warming rays
The cave in which I hide
Repels all her sunny ways

The cave I made from earth and  
Resignation
Never lets her kiss within
The cave I excavated
Collapses upon my daily sins

In those younger years

I once loved the sun


Details | I do not know? | |

My Heart Bleeds Tears

My Heart Bleeds Tears 
By Jim Campbell


My heart bleeds tears
For the voices 
I can no longer hear
For the hands I can
No longer hold
My eyes cry
Like a river
That tears through
The land
Never ending
Never ceding
Washing away my heart
I watch as your essence  
flows away
The memories 
The joys
In my mind still stay
Yet the thoughts
Of never seeing you
Come washing in
As do the fears
That are always here
And then 
My heart bleeds tears….. 


Details | Verse | |

Dad

Dad

Is it too late to say “I love you, Dad”
As you lay there on your bed?
Are words enough to express myself
Or the thoughts within my head?

Is it too late to say “I love you, Dad?”
Though I’m sure you really know
Despite my actions, words and deeds
Which sometimes made you wonder so

Is it too late to say “I love you, Dad?”
As I look you in the eye
A smile spreads ‘cross your tortured face
It’s enough to make me cry

Is it too late to say “I love you, Dad”
From my anguished, anxious soul?
Though next to yours, the pain’s so small
And your strength should be my goal

Is it too late to say “I love you, Dad”
After all these years?
If you could you’d say it’s not
Just to assuage my fears

Is it too late to say “I love you, Dad”
As I stand here next to you, so..
So much time has passed us by
Now I just want you to know.


Details | Couplet | |

Familiar Taste of Betrayal

I’ve tasted betrayal before just like I have tasted lies
but each time it’s so bitter, the taste always a surprise.

I cannot expel this sickness you left to rot in my soul
the brittleness of your lies that made you lose control.

So I am left no resolution and more unanswered questions,
you told me it would be an hour when I’d only had seconds.

You came in as an infection and you’re leaving a disease
once proud I stood and yet you brought me to my knees

your taking me down and you’re dragging me low.
Why take my hand if you only plan to just let go?


Details | Free verse | |

First Thing You Should Know 2

First thing you should know, is this isn’t a poem, it’s not a story, it’s not a song.  These 
are just the mad ramblings of a genius with a headache. 
Watching the smoke curl between his fingertips, he wonders.  Is it his body that’s on 
fire or his soul?  Physically he feels fine yet he sees the flames, inside the pain is 
excruciating yet, not a scratch to be seen.  Isn’t that a thought though, not a scratch to 
be seen on his soul.  Why is it that the scratches and cuts that do the most damage are 
the ones you can never see?  How can that much pain not leave a visible mark?  How 
much pain can the soul take before it turns into the story of humpty dumpty, never to 
be put back together again?  Isn’t it funny how you can forget your dying, when you 
have died inside?
First thing you should know, is this isn’t a poem, it’s not a story, it’s not a song.  These 
are just the mad ramblings of a genius with a headache.


Details | Lyric | |

NOT ENOUGH

Just another day
they often start the same
But without any warning
life can quickly go insane

Standing in front of a mirror
lights begin to blink
My son shouts "The house is on fire"
our lives are on the brink

In those next few moments
our house filled with dense smoke
Blinding the eyes from accumulated stuff 
life's true values fully awoke

Doesn't matter if you have little or a lot 
things eventually burn, rust, or rot
If your living to accumulate stuff
the more you have.. 
the more it's not enough

Standing on the street
firemen racing from everywhere
Looking intently at our house
you realize your home isn't there

Home is not brink and mortar
it's not the warehouse of stuff
Home is who you hold on to
when life seems oh so tough

Standing there together
the only possession in my hands
Is the one thing that really matters
My precious family's hands

Doesn't matter if you have little or a lot 
things eventually burn, rust, or rot
If your living to accumulate stuff
the more you have.. 
the more it's not enough

*The words of this poem came to me holding 
my family's hands and watching our house burn

Contest: Linda's #6 
Date: 6-5-14


Details | Free verse | |

The Beauty In Futility

Futility
my heart breathes its last breath
Embraces its own death
Ready to be reborn 
and made anew

Can’t live a lie
Refuse to “do”
and I’ll DIE....
Focus now on why I’ll live 
And never touch the sky. 

I have to forget you
I have to reject you 
But I will never love anyone 
like I loved you.....

I heard you whisper 
and you never knew it
I wiped the tears from your eyes 
But you couldn’t feel it

You’re lost and you’ll never find you
And neither will I 
And I’m so sorry--
but I’m NOT. 

I'll attempt to reset
Try to forget
But you know, I never will. 

Be my dirty little secret 
My very worst-kept secret 
Sweet, smooth, beautiful poison 
My infernal and endless attraction 
towards complete and utter self-destruction 

I fell in love with the devil
And it will take one heck of an angel
To save me from the likes of you....

My addiction 
my confusion
my nightmare
my dream never to come true

Oh, I’ll never forget the times
we never shared
I’ll never forget 
how you were never there

Always me, the stars, and tears
And I ask you,
what kind of life is THAT?

I have to face the facts 
I don’t know what happens now
but it happens without you. 

The stains will always be there
the scars will never fade
But the memory of you----
it HAS to. 

I could carry the torch forever
But it would only consume me
I can’t cry another tear for you
Or I’ll dry up completely

It doesn’t affect you
and you never deserved me

You’ll go on with your life, too
All, all alone
Because you’ll only ever be in love
with you. 


Details | Narrative | |

A Note To None

If I rewrote the story and somehow are paths
did not cross.
In temptations fire.
We would only know the cold of others.

Freezing in the silent agony unable 
to speak.
The statue remains its meaning erased.

As into others we will seek.
The emotions we no longer share.
Alone I am now inthe isolation of many blank
stares.

The jokes are but a wall built to conceal.
All that I am.
That I could never reveal.

Use the substances to keep you numb.
And let the voices take you to another place.

Beyond the madness there lies 
beauthy in pain.
And always truth.
Destruction breeds art.

I light up in a room of vacant stares
and empty lives.
To blind in addiction to know the other does exist.

In this den like some scene from a opium parlor from the west. 
Ashes hit the floor along with my pride.

This battle im losing with devilish glee.
All but nothing is left.
so in the shadows I confide. 

Sometimes wisdom can come from great acts of stupidty 
sometimes pain brings us closer to the truth 
nothing stays buried   it just lays in wait.


Details | Rhyme | |

The Other Side

In vile defeat I confided to helplessness
I cringed knowing I know so little
As inadequate as I am I felt responsible 
I felt responsible to know everything

In this mentality I suffered long nights
Over thinking myself and overlooking life
Until I gave up the pain for a little while
And took a deep, dark look to the other side


Details | Ballad | |

Silently I Cry For You

I wander through this land 
Of broken promises and dreams
Clouded by the death of you
Wondering what life means

My colourless existence 
In a world of black and grey
Reflects the person I’ve become
And who I am today

Without you in my life 
I seem to have no life at all
No one here to guide me
Or to catch me when I fall

I almost hear you breathing
I almost feel you near
I almost feel your touch
Sometimes it’s almost like you’re here

This jigsaw puzzle of my life
Has pieces I can't find
For half of me went with you
Leaving half of me behind

I feel so cold and lonely
So battered and so bruised
I feel so insecure right now
Tortured and confused

My life is like an open book
Written but unread
Thoughts I never told you
Words I never said

The voice of hidden truth, I know
Will never now be spoken
Though time may heal my scars
I know my hearts forever broken

Silently I cry for you
Silently I pray
For silence is the loudest spoken word
I never say

I can’t escape the darkness 
I’ve come to know so well
While you are free in heaven
I still reside in hell

And here I will remain 
Until the day my life is through
Until the day God takes my hand
And leads me back to you..



By Raina Hutchins


Details | Acrostic | |

Five Letters

These are the five letters you left me with:

So you are leaving, walking away,
Old wounds grate against silence.
Realizing a moment too late, what’re you doing,
Reading through all those beautiful lies,
You never meant what you said.

And, I read them, over and over again
but five small letters never seemed so big. 


Details | Ballad | |

Memories

Thinking back on you and I
It doesn’t seem that long
It’s hard for me believing how
The years have come and gone
Everything about you still
So fresh inside my mind
Precious memories locked away
But never left behind
I shared with you my daytimes
But my nights I spent alone
It tore my heart to know your nights
Were not spent on your own
I knew the risks involved
Because you wore a wedding ring
But I never knew the pain for me
That wedding band would bring
For years my heart was frozen
From a love that it once knew
But I knew my heart had melted
When I fell in love with you
With you and I together
So many things were shared
But most importantly
I never said how much I cared
I tried to hide this love from you
Afraid to let you see
Not knowing of the child we’d made
Growing inside of me
I knew I’d never be with you
I never could have stayed, because
We took away this tiny life
That you and I had made
There’s nothing else you could have done
On you I lay no blame
But now my life feels empty
Full of sadness, loss and shame
I would give my all to spend
Another night with you
For you to hold me in your arms
And say you love me too
But if this never happens
Then I want to tell you still
I loved you then, I love you now
I know I always will...


By Raina Hutchins


Details | Free verse | |

Neon And Romance.

Sodden dripped of midnight words
A slurred plight 
Perhaps of tonight
Broken in the sobering dawn
In this smoky staleness
We meet in false courage
Eluding the touch 
The tenderness we cry for
Fearing heavy
Those frangible lovers
Remaining hidden
Behind bloodshot eyes
Masking the obvious veracity
Of a single hope 
A love repressed in the stupor
Of alcoholic comfort
Ever silently aching
In deadpanned hearts…


Details | Free verse | |

Solution

As my hands reach out before me
It touches nothing but air
Where have you gone my love?
My heart, it sings for you
But you are not there to hear it
Where have you gone my love?
Have I descended upon the barren moon,
Where desert sands seem my outlook?
Have I wandered a lonely path,
Where night greets me with solitude?
Come back, grab my hand,
Listen to my heart and then
Listen to your heart
For it will be then
That neither of us will be …alone


Details | Alliteration | |

Liquor Lips

If I were the bottle 
You would press your lips to my neck nightly.
If I were the liquid
 You would consume me multiple.
But I am just a woman
Who needs your attention always. 
If only you could
Liquor lips.


Details | Free verse | |

Phantasmagoric Moments

For one moment I thought
Moons stars and kingdoms,
Humbly yielded to the spell of your tongue;
For I would never miss such an honour
When my heart still dies in front.

From the gravest yard in my groans,
In those rainy eyes of autumn,
You stole into the fragrance of my desert red bloom;
Despite the venom in my features,
You killed the old beast in my gloom.

For one moment I thought
Flowers, bees, and dew drops
Had never been bleeding forever;
The honey have they made
Fell us in love like a feather.

For one moment I thought
We stumbl’d upon each other.


Details | Rhyme | |

Needle in the Hay

I thought you were my needle in the hay
The soulmate I’d been searching for, for endless days
The love of a lifetime, here on poetrysoup
Right under my nose, and I never knew 
Till I found you one night, when I couldn’t sleep
Your words like sweet bees, pollinating me 

We chatted and joked and had so much fun 
I realized at once that you were “the one” 
The one to complete me, the one I had sought
Until I saw your new picture, and saw you were NOT
The “Chris” that I thought - but a girl!
A GIRL! A gir-l couldn’t complete my world! 

You weren’t a needle in the hay 
You were just you, with your gir-l face 
Your tiger picture, a fantasy mistake -
A dead flower I shake out of my vase 
The dreams I held fast
Red petals, now in the trash


3/12/12
Inspired by Chris Aechtner


Details | Lyric | |

Normal To Me

This isn't just a poem This isn't just another emotion This is me, these are my thoughts The Imagery is my sight, And The Allegories are my Life I'm lonely, There is just me But there's so many people around but no one can hear my loudest screams Don't Shout nor Scream This is all just Normal To Me I'm torn, I'm Cut Part of my heart stabbed, and then taken from me The Search for my innocence, Is like a moa hunt Don't Shout nor Scream This is all just Normal To Me Laughing and Jokes all directed towards me Just to Hurt me Cover all of the Halls "Fag, Emo, Queer" Words I too often know Don't Shout nor Scream This is all just Normal To Me Curling her hair putting on her makeup "You're worthless and nothing to Me" Says the so-called all-loving-one As she screams: "Why am I not Pretty" Don't Shout nor Scream This is all just Normal To Me This is not just a poem not just some words my pen cries with each words But this is Just a Glimpse Don't Shout nor Scream This is all just Normal To Me


Details | I do not know? | |

The Beast Within

Where does my conscious go, when demons raise their fiery eyes, 
They steal my very soul, killing all which is sanctified,
Engulfed by instant fears, no longer hearing loved ones cries, 
The beast within appears, telling me I am justified,

I have already lost, no reprieve from my mortal sin, 
All reason now is blocked, as I become the beast within,
No pity can I feel, as I make my grandiose stand, 
Yes the horror is real, as I destroy all that I can,

Where do my feelings go, when demons raise their snarling lips, 
Bringing an all new low, into my life now torn to bits,
Certain of being right, I flail and thrash as if in fits, 
I threaten and I strike, with great fury the demon spits,

Yet I still stand and shout, my ugly hate and derision, 
Accusing lies said out loud, revolting words - degradation,
Just look at what I’ve done, I scream my blatant confession, 
Ready to blame anyone, for my evil molestation,

Where does my true love go, when demons raise their gruesome head, 
Destroying all I know, without slightest hesitation,
There is no where to hide, hideous deeds - infinite dread, 
Shame crushes senseless pride, nothing left but devastation,

Recoiling in horror, reality enters the room, 
Now begins the torture, judgment of my now mortal soul,
The evil that is me, my conscious has become my tomb, 
I look and all I see, marks my spirit and takes its toll,

Where does salvation go, when demons raise their awful screech, 
Making damnation grow, as dark shadows envelope me,
How can I persevere, and escape from this demon’s reach, 
For he is always near, and may kill eventually,

Cold and chilling insight, I now realize what is at stake, 
And the one path which might, protect the ones I truly love,
But how can I just leave, this world I worked so hard to make, 
And cause even more grief, for family and God above. 

Where does my resolve go, when demons raise their deadly claws,
Tearing at all I know, stealing my conscious care and pride,
I can’t run anymore, all is destroyed everything lost,
Now beaten tired and sore, I’ve lost my path into the light,

Who can I reach out to, when all I love recoil in fear, 
Eyes beseech black and blue, where once was love - now only hate,
Yes I know - I’m the cause, the reason for each falling tear,
And while demons give pause, I must face my terrible fate.


Details | Lyric | |

Goodbye

My life is torn between two worlds
Of now and used to be
But all I ever wanted 
Was the world of you and me
Memories of the only love 
That I have ever known
It’s hard to hold them in my heart
But hard to let them go
At times I wonder who I am
Where did I go wrong 
Why am I so lonely 
In a life I don’t belong
I know my heart will never heal
While feeling so much pain
I’ll never find the sunshine 
While I’m following the rain
Too late now for miracles
They wouldn’t change a thing
For someone else’s finger
Now wears your wedding ring
But though our song has ended
You still want us to dance
And though I’m still in love with you
My heart can't take the chance
Forever I will miss you
And forever I will cry, but
To find myself again
I know I have to say goodbye..

By Raina Hutchins


Details | Ballad | |

I Cry

I lay awake all through the night
While others lay asleep
As I think of you and I 
The tears roll down my cheek

I cry because I love you
I cry because I care
But most of all the reason why I cry
Is you're not there

My heart is torn and bleeding
A wound I cannot heal
And in my eyes you see you the hurt
And pain I can’t conceal

I wonder if you think of me
When you are all alone
I wonder if you miss the nights of passion 
We have known

I wonder if the smile you wear
Is just a fake disguise
I wonder if it's me you're seeing
When you close your eyes

You never will be mine again 
But still I won't regret
And pray you will remember
What I never will forget...


By Raina Hutchins


Details | Lyric | |

I WENT FOR A WALK TODAY

I went for a walk today
Hoping I wouldn't see you
Because I don't know what to say

I looked at every face in the crowd
Hoping it wasn't you
But that's not really true

Every laugh melted my heart
Echos of a past now broken apart
Seems everyone reminded me of you
A glimpse here and there of what we'd do

I remember how..
Your songs made me high
Being with you was always blue sky
I was crazy to ever say goodbye
Like a fool I chased a pretty lie

Now baby, time stands still
My songs have lost their thrill
I dance but it no longer rhymes
My mind is a captive of better times

I looked at every face in the crowd
Hoping it was you
Somehow I wish you knew

I wouldn't know what to say
Hoping I'd see you anyway
I went for a walk today

Contest: Linda's #8
Date: 6-15-14


Details | Rhyme | |

WATCHING A SUMMER STORM IN DOYLESTOWN

    WATCHING A SUMMER STORM IN DOYLESTOWN
I was laid to rest, 
my death keeps getting better.
If you find me here, you know, I'm yours to keep.
I could try to say 
I love you in this letter,
or pretending you are here, sing you to sleep.

If the world was mine,
I find it quite amusing,
I would give it all away, to see your eyes,
I would save your life,
and everything you're losing,
all because you never see who's telling lies.

I am just as dead
as is your heart each morning.
If the wind has blown, you know I will be there.
I will touch your life,
without much of a warning,
never look for me, just know I'm everywhere.

I'm a summer storm,
my hope is crashing thunder.
I'm a lightning bolt, my love is five alarm.
if I rain all night,
it's just a spell I'm under,
you should know I'm dead, and won't do any harm.

I'm a little boy.
An old man getting younger.
All I have is how I know how things should be.
We still want the world
to live in death and hunger,
yet I love your eyes, when your eyes look at me.


Details | Quatrain | |

Average Age 19

Once again, the powers that must
In rise again in what we trust
An overseas conflict, another war
Just what in the hell are we fighting for

Families are asking, Korea has just passed
Generations again reft, how long will it last
A country in need, to rebuild again
Flags at half mast, in wind and rain strain

Once again into war, sent by the Washington Post
To send back reports to hit home the most
Military observers were the first to be sent in
Another chapter of man entering existing sin

I'm witnessing our ariel power, Lam Son 719
US planners determine their incursion, saying all will be fine
Along the Mekong River, we'll carpet bomb their supply trail
Tons of munitions and napalm, this spread surely cannot fail

Many sorties are being flown, for the wounded and the dead
Whilst Nixon and his cronies, aren't thinking with their heads
The news of losses has reached me, nineteen have been killed
Eleven missing, fifty nine wounded, more American blood spilled

Seven fixed wing aircraft, more sons in action loss
Whilst back at home more protests, fading the dyeing's gloss
To to this job that I do, I was never prepared for this
To witness such bloody scenes, and ignore that life is bliss

How can I write about a soldier, whose name I'll never know
Killed at nineteen years old, his family he'll never see grow
Or even explain to his parents, when carried from the AH-1
His body bullet riddled and limp, when lifted it bloodily run

I never went back to the theatre, called the Vietnam War
Having witnessed the wanton killing, what were we fighting for
This colonial conflict that started, us on the side of France
So many came back as strangers, many to live in trance





James Fraser's entry into the contest " WORLD OF WAR: VIETNAM "



Details | Imagism | |

SLEEPING WITH THE DEVIL'S WIFE

   SLEEPING WITH THE DEVIL'S WIFE
Some night you'll wake before morning
Sweatin to the oldies she will sing.
She'll make you think you're in Heaven...
Long enough to tell you ANYTHING...

And you'll believe her.

Some night you'll wake up hearing voices
Sweatin to the oldies of here life.
She'll never say you're in Heaven.
Or tell you you've been sleeping with the Devil's Wife.

She'll never tell you, you've been sleeping with the Devil's wife.

But you will KNOW.
You will know.

That's when you'll need her.
That's when you'll love her the most.
That's when you will die.
Sleeping with the Devil's wife.

That's when you will die.
   
© ron wilson aka vee bdosa ---hear the song and First take Video on Youtube, search for vee bdosa then select SLEEPING WITH THE DEVILS WIFE. One of my personal favorites, more poetry than song.


Details | Couplet | |

CROSSROADS

‘’ ‘ ‘ ‘’’ ‘’’’’ Like a lady-in-waiting in rags of night questions divide wrong from right, ripping faded threads without seams as daybreak continues its beams, its beams Again, yearning to taste the thrill of dawn clay feet slowly loitering, dawdling on for crystalline wishes that did not come to pass dazed eyes are now compelled to plead, to ask Was such existence just a dance of mixed fantasy? a fool’s waltz of pungent deceit and treachery a wrenching flood of wasted years cloaked in love masks and bloodshot tears And she hides behind aged trees and edgily slips While salt of pain pressed on Calvary’s lips, an echo strains she may be cherished still that only the cross of doubt haunts her will More shadows loom upon hills rancid green is this a tale of truth or lie, her twilight unseen? she breathes to touch stretched hours of time oh, will she leave or stay; tossing a dime, a dime © ‘ ‘’’’’ ‘ ‘ Contest: Debbie Guzzi’s Tell Me a Story By: nette onclaud
/


Details | Ballad | |

Boy and Girl

I feel my mind go wondering back
And let the years unfold
To when I first met you
When we were only twelve years old

So innocent and young we were
Just holding hands together
When we shared our first kiss
I thought you’d stay with me forever

But then as we grew up
I left behind my school girl days
It broke my heart to turn our backs
And go our separate ways

And as the years passed by
I tried to put you from my mind
For I had family ties now
Leaving memories far behind

But you and I had something
That forever would be there
A love that grew from innocence
That no one else could share

And though I tried forgetting
In my heart you did remain
For deep inside I knew one day 
Our paths would cross again

We couldn’t hide our feelings
Though we both knew it was wrong
For we were man and woman now
The boy and girl had gone

But deep inside we’d always known
That 'we' could never be
While you were tied to someone else
I had my family

So once again you walk away
But never will you know
The sadness and the pain inside
The tears I'll never show

The heartache that will stay with me
Until the day I die
For you will always be the love I lost
Who said goodbye...


By Raina Hutchins 
(written for my friend)


Details | Rhyme | |

Chaff vs Wheat - Relief

a saraband

Your tirade comes, it doth commence,
a hundred miles away I sense
your raging, whiny voice so tense.
In restful tones, my evening sigh
doth thank these stars, you’re in L.A.
I shirk my duties ever nigh
and thoughts engage where'er they may.

As I recline, dark quickly falls
and in my dreams, I snub your calls.
Yet when I wake, receding walls
resound your dire return to home.
I sense both hearts long to be free.
Go claim L.A., just let me roam
these miles that winnow thee from me.



Details | Free verse | |

Lost in Ink Stains

My words are lost in ink stains 
Verses smudged in prints of you 
Illegible scribbles soon fill in lines 
Once paved with love anew  
Now only paperless pain ensues 

An unnatural sequence of thoughts
Scribed in distressed hues of blue
Will re-actively release your grip 
But the pain it can’t undo 
Now only agony grew

My heart hands weep writes of tomorrow  
My paper and pen are tempered in sorrow
My emotions bellow wallows 

Of a mournful mind  
I pray
This too 
Shall pass
In time…



 


Details | Romanticism | |

Delicate Flower

Delicate flower
So lovely, and so sweet
Ravaged by wind
And rain and summer heat

Joyful to view
With the sweetest scent
Why nature could bring
harm to you
Makes me wonder where God went

I cry inside
I'll never understand
How such delicate beauty
Could come to such evil harm
All I see is beauty
And innocent loving charm.


Details | Rubaiyat | |

I Must Go

---inspired by a story character of mine
------------------------------------------------------------------
Losing reality, losing my mind I try to stay with you but I'm falling behind This fate's going nowhere I'm left hurting inside Tomorrow's not coming What are you becoming Nothing is out there Pain and suffering forthcoming Nowhere to hide, I'm on my own Feeling so empty and alone Your hatred shines bright Your heart, a deadened stone This pain you inflict upon me Hurts greater than I'll ever let you see But still I love you so Though I know you can-will never love me I just hope you know That even though the love I want from you will never be so I'll always love you But now, before it hurts anymore, I must go...


Details | Rhyme | |

Shameful Morning

not sure how she got here 
only know she needs to leave

underneath the stranger 
my arm numb; asleep, 
mouth a desert.
a hundred dead cigarettes dance my tongue dry 

princess of night 
exposed by light. 
get me out of this;
another dreaded morning mess. 

bed broken
along with my will. 
I swore never again; 
the lie is half the thrill.

~JSLambert


Details | Lyric | |

For All Eternity

As daylight dawns my eyes close
On another sleepless night
So cold and all alone without
Your arms to hold me tight
I look out through the glass
And watch the sunrise in the sky
And still I find no answers
As again I’m asking why
My nights they seem so endless
Then I face another day
So full of pain and loneliness
Since God took you away
People say that time will heal
That I’ll get over you
That one day I will laugh again
That I’ll find someone new
I only wish they’d understand
Why that will never be
I’ll never love another
For you were my destiny
And though I've tried to carry on
My fears I cannot hide
I just can’t face this world alone
Without you by my side
The tablet bottles empty now
And on our I lay
I put my hands together
Then I close my eyes and pray
Please God will you send back down
My Angel from above
Then he will gently take my hand
And lead me back to love
He’ll guide the way to Heaven
Where together we will be
Two Angel's who are blessed with love
For all eternity...



By Raina Hutchins


Details | Free verse | |

Alive

And we are left here Like maggots—dirty, parentless…devastated Always feeding on the gruel…the cruel Fattening our lives in the moneyless bilk Shocking like a bee sting, yet soft as silk We are the forgotten I am watching the others grow rotten But I am cleansed and raw with glee Because…though blinded with slime…I SEE… I rise to the sound of the agonizing screams Of rapes, murders, of violent fists…weeping minds My definition of true finds… I smile when any possible hope arrives Fate laughs, knowing I constantly scream inside I am amused of it all…I can’t stop laughing As bitter tears began to fall I HATE ALL OF YOU… I WANT TO KILL YOU ALL… But I love that I can take anything From the nothing we have all been labeled The sick, the low…the mentally unstable Watch me roll up in a ball A naughty tease to death’s lull I love your silence… I love your intense fall And we are more alive than any of you We are crazed by your belligerence Aching to be emotionless SHARE YOUR INDIFFERENCE SHARE IT… Give us something to be left with So the others can die As Fate veers its head looking in the mirror Listen to her laughter—do you hear her? She watches and waits To find her maggots have grown wings… Screw your selfish indifference...we fall to fly We are more alive than any of you Though quickly we die


Details | Dramatic monologue | |

Unsettled

My eyes grow heavy,
Yet I can't sleep,
My soul feels weighted,
But I can't weep

I dream on
Without the hope I need
I need to talk
Yet my tongue's not freed

I clutch my pillow,
I cling to the thought
Of how we met,
And why we fought

It all seems so silly now,
And I wonder why
We could let this stand
And let love die

Pure "saving face"
Holds me back,
Especially since
Your verbal attack

Being a person,
No easy thing,
You've left your nest
And the protection of
Your mother's wing

Should i call?
Or hold out?
Be the weak one?
Or stand and shout?

Oh, Lord, please guide me
Let me know
The way to be...

I roll over in bed again,
And turn on the light,
But light doesn't help.
I have no sight...

Indecision means inaction
I start to groan,
To lose your love,
A fear greatly grown

Turn off the light,
Again to bed
In many ways,
Wishing I was dead.


Details | Fibonacci | |

Betrayal Of The Soul

.
A
Young
Mother
Rocks baby
Singing  happy song
Love in its purity bonding
Daddy slips into the arms of another woman


Details | Dramatic monologue | |

Discordant

My guitar strings in the moonlight should be something beautiful,

but the cold liquid white just makes everything harsher.

–not soft like snow, but deceptively fine –

Light is discordant 

like my clumsy fingers that keep 

mutilating the restless heavens with their attempts at mourning.


Why won’t they move right,

Don’t they realize how much depends on perfection?


I’m right here; I mutter to the stars and pray they spread it out over you

Like the night they hold up while atlas dreams.

But I’m not there. I’m not even anywhere –

I can’t put a finger on me.

I’m not real. I whisper over the translucent shell of my existence 

and drench myself in intangible alabaster…

and I’m not real because I need your voice

to tell me I’m not invisible,

to stop me from falling up like a red balloon.

I don’t want to be the scar in the sky anymore.


I’m looking at patterns of patterns of the beyond

and no matter how many constellations I calculate in my head

the lines here, here, and here, easy as you please

I shiver because I know it makes no sense.

Not like we did.


I’m walking on edges of that metallic element of pale

and grasping red-rimmed fistfuls of atmosphere

but they’re never close enough, the stars–

and that’s why they’re there. That’s what I’ll tell my children. 

They’re just the paint-brush splattered whim of 

some malevolent deity –

Maybe we all are. I write it down, “paint-splatter of flesh” 

tracing finger-prints through indignant sprigs of lawn.

But I might as well be writing on the bathroom mirror 

because the words still won’t come out right.


And now everything’s backwards –

and you can’t fall up

and you can’t explain god

and you can’t fix light, even if it looks broken

and you can’t reflect sound, even if you angle it just so.


I can’t live like this.


Details | Haiku | |

Friendzoned

they won't hurt you now
even though you hurt me bad
signed your best friend


Details | Free verse | |

Hate-filled Love

I hate your touch and your smile.
Wicked little creature.

I hate your blue eyes and brown hair.
Sinful hate filled liar.

I hate your voice and your scent.
Rotten two-timer.

I hate you everything you do for what you did.
But we loved and touched, smiled, talked and connected physically.

You lied about our moments spend, 
you can't look me in the eyes.

You lead me on and stole my youth, 
but don't have the nerve to speak to me now.

I hate your beauty and your thievery;
but loved the way you made me fill.

I hate that you now do the same to another girl;
your lies blind her.

I hate the diseases you carry; 
love the infection you gave.

I love you and can't let go,
hate because I’m smarter than this.

I hate this poem because I think of you with every word...
Your eyes, your smile, your hair, your skin, and your kiss.

Most of all...

I love you for the time we had.
I hate you because you don't want me now. 


Now what???


Details | Free verse | |

I Have To Forgive You

-to my mom... inspired by Nathan Fehr-

I have to forgive you
For what you have done
For what you didn’t do
For leaving me in gloom
Leaving us all wondering
If you would ever return
I have to forgive you
Because you can smile away everything
Because we need you
And love you
Sometimes I know 
That you would have stayed
If it weren’t for God’s intervention
You would have stayed with him
If you hadn’t been thrown out
And abandoned
We were your last resort
I understand
I do
But that doesn’t mean I am not hurt
I forgive you
For the worst and for the best
We are blessed
To have you back
Though we will never truly understand
What made you leave us all behind
I guess you really loved him
The loveless … I understand
You wanted to make someone happy
You wanted to fill that empty void
But by doing so
Others had to suffer
But you didn’t want us to suffer
You were just tired of it
Tired of doing everything
We were your last resort
We were abandoned
And you returned
With open arms
And tears of bitter sweetness
I have come to forgive you
Because if I don’t
There you will go again
Freed skyline pigeon
And I love you
So much
Please don't leave us
Let your wings rest 


Details | Concrete | |

Tears are out of place


Pushed aside...

Like day abandons night...

Like night abandons day...

I reach inside restore...

Inner strength...
Inner pride...
...repair pain...

Cast out painful words...
Slice deep, Slash chore...

Truth revealed...
...blood is thicker than water...

Shadows surface...Soul in tears...

...Into the night this heart falls...

...Injustice falls within...

...Where is my strength...
...I clamber toward your trace step...

...My courage turns to you now...

...Deep within another lesson learned...

...Tears are out of place...

...Somewhere my sun is shining...

...Into this silence I hide...

...retreat all feelings displaced...

...My heart abandoned...

...This hurt...self repent...

With unknown limit...

Mighty wisdom grace...

...Tears are out of place...
...Tears are out of place...
...Tears are out of place...


Details | Free verse | |

Broken Trombones

Dark and lonely
A cave in my soul
Dripping with emotion
A tidal flood
Encrypted in my heart
An arrow through a lark
Broken trombones
And old sousaphones
Honk into the night
I'm a rain dog that bites
I am a rattle snake 
That wants to fight
There’s no love here
There never has been
You ask me for my hand
It’s a shaker and a tam
No thank you ma’am
I'll take my chances 
On snake eyes
And remove the scales
That tie
So don’t come looking
For sunlight
It’s damp and dreary here
For a heart that is closed
This is no place for you dear


Details | Free verse | |

Never Again

Silently, she lies there listening to sirens off in the distance, 
On the bed where they just recently enjoyed each other’s passion.
The neighborhood dogs, barking at the noise in the night, are taken inside by their owners.
Tears streak down her cheeks knowing that never again would she make love to him.

Never again would they kiss and make up;
Never again would they laugh together until it hurt;
Never again would she stare intently into his deep, dark eyes;
Never again would she cuddle with him in the dark of the night;

Never again would he strike her in anger;
Never again would he leave bruises all over her body;
Never again would he overpower her with his brute strength;
Never again would she lie about how she got another black eye.

She loved him too much to find fault with his behavior;
Surely, somehow, she must have deserved the full force of his wrath.
She hated him too much to continue to endure the pitiful look in his eyes
As if asking, why do you allow me to treat you like a whore?

Flashing lights of blue and red reflected off the corners of the bedroom wall.
Neighbors, dressed in bathrobes, pointed the police officers to the window of her room.
The gun which pierced the silence of the night with six rapid, successive blasts
Slipped from her fingers, landing on the floor next to the lifeless body of her man.


Details | Free verse | |

Enough

I will die
here at the doorsteps
of your heart wondering
why you let
me come so
close and yet you kept
me so
distant

A wall of
ice and glass
prevents me from
any
further move

Gasping for my
last
breathe I am
left
to guess what it takes for
you
to give up plans and
schemes and
surrender
to love

When you will 
finally
open that door my
corpse
will greet you
frozen and you will not
be
able to ever
resuscitate me.


Details | Epitaph | |

Whispers Of An Angry Wind

With blaring voice,

You've stolen her life away.

I think,

My heart shall ne'er mend.

Caused you the trees to snap,

And sway.

Now the softness of your voice,

Scarcely causes the grass

to bend.


Details | Blank verse | |

The Searching (1995)

I’ve been dying inside for so many years
I’ve bee searching for a cure
I try so hard to understand what my body is telling me
I can feel my heart aching, the void I feel is so strong
I’ve been searching for ways to fill what was never given as a boy
I had love once and for a time my heart and soul were content
But I put my happiness at jeopardy long ago
And since that time I just haven’t been the same
I’ve accomplished so many things in such a short time
But I’m being engulfed by rage anger
The beast within my soul will not leave me alone
My heart, mind and soul are not sound
I can feel that I am at war with myself
I’ve been exercising my body and mind 
But my soul is lost in the abyss
This hollow feeling of loneliness
So many emotion are building up inside
My quest for happiness seems to be an endless journey.
I’m breathing so heavy lately and 
the pain within my chest grows stronger
the building of my foundation is weighing me down
the child inside is hiding but I can hear him crying
my smile has disappeared and my eyes have become so sad.
I have no strong religious belief.
I’ve been seeking exodus in so many alternate ways.
They say you must love yourself first
In order to gain peace with your own inner beast
I must face all of my fears, it is only then that this dead and 
empty feeling will heal the child inside. 


Details | Verse | |

Your Television Set Don't Love You, Darlin'

You’re wasting your weekends on electronic lovers,
They float by like ghosts on the screen,
You’re kissing Clark Gable and you waltz Fred Astaire
In re-runs you’ve already seen.

You’re changing the stations—you change your emotions—
From channel to channel in vain. 
The six o’clock news man is laughing at you,
And the talk show believes you’re insane.

Your television set don’t love you, darlin’
So how come you watch it from bed?
Your television set don’t love you, darlin’,
So why don’t you love me instead?

Down at the tavern my Budweiser loves me,
There’s a TV set over the bar,
And the girl on the screen, she reminds me of you,
So I get up and go to my car.

I drive through the night and the windshield wipers
Remove all the rain from the glass—
It’s like a wide screen, and our show’s off the air…
Our soap opera just didn’t last…


Details | Lyric | |

TAPESTRY

.........TAPESTRY
Out of time that's long forgotten, 
in a light that's yet unknown,
you could see me in the morning, 
I would be there, but alone,
weaving tapestries from fibers 
of someone who'd never guess,
she is part of dreams and vision,
and somebody's happiness.
    But she would know someone was there.
     I'd touch her now if I would dare.
      And she would know I'm always there.

There's a story and it's Celtic, 
"We must love all things, to see
how a raindrop loves the flower, 
but the flower loves a bee."
In the tapestry I'm weaving, 
I have told this story well,
and the dream she is a part of, 
is the other tale I tell.
    She knows someone has touched her mind.
     I'm always there for her to find.
      And she is always on my mind.

It's a love beyond a question, 
but a love that's out of place,
out of time and out of reason, 
but unable to erase.
In the tapestry I'm weaving ,
there's no differences to see,
she is rising from the ocean 
to a love God's meant to be.
...And she has known a love that's good.
.....Though it is never understood.
........But she'll remember love is good.
© ron wilson


Details | Rhyme | |

a new breath from despair - phoenix rising

"i can see the truth, in pain's honest form
a death rejoiced, a life unknown."


when at times, my despair grows high
i keep with me, an honest nights cry
when darkness closes, and the night is long
i remember the sun, and keep my faith strong

a new day has come, with its own peace of mind
and then i can believe, love isn't that hard to find
i look around and see, the rays of a brand new day
shining brightly all around me, a hope for me to say:


"i can see the peace, in truth's honest form
a life rejoiced, a love reborn."


Details | ABC | |

A Yearn for a Smile 9-21-11

	A yearn… simply something that you want or long for. As a yearn to finish, a yearn to achieve, a yearn for a like, a yearn for a smile is something that you drastically want, a desire. Something that you spend long hours, nights even day dreaming hours thinking about how you can earn that smile. What can you do…. or what can you say … things such as a conversation sparks, likes even dislikes, mostly anything that will crack a smile. These are things that truly show signs of something far greater than fame, sex, money, power. What is it? Something more than I have yet to find. So as I search for the answer I over shoot the entrance with rapid thinking of what she wants, her likes, her dislikes. But truly it will only be earned by who you are, what you want to be, yourself, your feelings your desires, your yearn. So when you yearn for that smile or that special something it can only be earned by being you, no one else. Take a look at yourself in the mirror and try to see past the makeup or tan or piercing and just look at yourself… then take that image and imprint it to yourself forever because to find happiness and your yearn  can only be earned one way. Trying to watch her and she how she reacts to certain things just to make myself seem better when I finally open my mouth to her will only make you distant from that special someone.  With me I personally see myself as buff pierced orange person, while trying to continue to follow the people who I look up to the most. So as you struggle and go through life’s trials and tribulations always look at your yearn or what it once it what was. Think about how you felt when you failed or succeeded and try to make yourself a better person from it. Not by adding more glamour or appeal to yourself but by being closer to yourself. What you really are. Because only then can you truly say you earned your yearn of a smile or that special someone, even if there not with you, apart of them will be and that’s the part they left. The part that made you better. More complete. 			So never forget your yearn of her..


Details | Free verse | |

White Cold Moon

Outside, the moon is alone in the sky
and floats bright white in the ocean
of the great black-blue on high.

It illuminates slightly my surroundings,
giving everything the soft pallid hue
that makes everything something familiar,
though some things I have never seen.

All things being equal,
under the bright white moon,
I see the waves of grass
in neighboring lawns that I’ve never trod,
and I see the soft waves of the moon
dancing off the rooftops of houses
that I’ve never been welcomed in,
that contain neighbors that I’ve never met.

It’s cold out…
if the sun gives off heat in the day,
does the moon radiate chills at night?

The moon sheds its cold, emotionally bankrupt light
on everything I see.
Is this how I should be?
If this is how all emotional attachment ends up,
should I even bother?

Or better yet, should I wait for the moon,
that reopens my wounds just by shining on me?
Every time it comes into sight,
I can’t help but think of all the times
it left me dark and cold.

Should I wait for it to change,
or should I move on?
I can’t see why I should waste my time,
when there are other things that
can radiate a brighter and warmer light than this.

If I see it shining its light on others;
what light does it have for me?


Details | Bio | |

Monday sans him

Sometimes ... there is no reason
     for morning tears.

Distracted me
     tangled in the debris
     of a raging sea.
So very small
the moment
     meant
nothing at all.

And what of that day ....
dismade bed
dirty sock left on the kitchen floor
       I was going to scrub a week ago
left me crying and
cursing
       falling to pieces
where is my other shoe
       my toes are cold
speed bump on shaky knees
spills my morning tea.

Sometimes there is no reason ....


Details | Free verse | |

A Winter Walk

I needed some time, some space to think
And it was either take a walk or drink
And since I knew drinking would solve nothing
I put on my shoes and I started walking

The wind blew the chilly air
Through my unkempt locks of hair,
But I hardly felt the biting cold,
Walking with memories warm in my soul

The street was dark, cold and silent
It was funny the places where my mind went
While I slowly walked across the blacktop road
No destination in mind where I would go

It's funny the things you will remember
I recall a day in mid-December
And how suddenly, nothing seemed the same
After that man at the door called my name

I followed him into a secluded office
Where he would tell me his diagnosis
And suddenly I felt my beating heart
But the rest of the world had just stopped

I felt a hand in mine get tighter
I don't think the room could have been quieter
I shook my head in total disbelief
Too numb to feel anything, even grief

The question asked, "What does this mean?"
But the answer didn't mean anything
My head too fuzzy, my thoughts too jumbled
I turned to my love to speak, but mumbled

I don't remember what else he said
Because of the swirling thoughts in my head
It took three days before I could even think
Which led me to tonight: walk or drink

So I walked and I thought and I truly remembered
Dreams of the past, love treasured forever
Friendship and laughter, sorrow and pain
As though I was reliving my life over again

Little things that I'd sorely taken for granted
Things that didn't happen the way that I planned it
Promises made and ones that were broken
Love that was shared, love still unspoken

The frosty air filled me with a sense of renewal
Inside my soul was fighting a duel
The angel, the devil, both battling demons
Inside of myself I fought to redeem them

I don't know who won the ethereal battle
And I'm not sure right now it even matters
Where once I believed everything for a reason
I'm finding that harder and harder to believe in


Details | Narrative | |

A Slight Return

Darkness is my life that apears in
light.
Has it come to just another fix.
The smile does conceal my losing fight.

The music the screams within.
The lies eat away at the man I can no 
longer stand.

Hollow is thy heart.
Crimson stains all that is never held in
hand.

It started a game now it's a curse.
In darkness I speak to you
all I could never say.
The man once known to you.
Has all but faded away.

And as I slip into adictions abyss.
Candle lit memories were taken
with the breeze. 
That killed that romantic glow.

As the stranger who exists in the form
once you did love.
Twist's into a form you cannot understand.

I ask out of love for you to forget.
The monster that haunts this form.

In memories true love we will forever know.
The emptyness of of this life.
And the once splendid candle lights glow. 
In truth we die. 
As we live. 
So must we cry. 

Not every every question has a answer my friends. 
Gonzo.


Details | Free verse | |

Back to Sender

You speak of love, and I say nay
Betrayal is more like it
I trusted you, but you took advantage
plundering it to oblivion

Your tokens of love are laughable,
all merely fool’s gold
they satiated me before
now they disgust me                                                                      
          

We speak of different kinds of love
Yours is physical, mine is emotional
and I refuse to give in anymore
so throw away your bargaining chips

This love is not for sale.




**May 25, 2010 written for John’s The Gauntlet contest :)


Details | Dramatic monologue | |

Drowning

stop pretending you care, you never loved me
but your eyes filled with bliss my every day
i know i'm not her, i'm not trying to be
all my hopes of acceptance will fade away

polite words of love do me harm
stop saying things you dont believe
i could cover my corpse with your arm
but its worthless since you shall deceive


i dont want to admit who you are
the purpose itself is in vain
depressed angels could start war
seeing my dieing reflectons of pain

please tell my weak heart you cant
you are not, you shall never be tru
for,my love,deep dreams i shall haunt
everytime black leaves are drowning in dew


Details | Haiku | |

Among the Seashells

Forlorn, forgotten;
do tears still exist
at the bottom of the sea?


Details | Free verse | |

Afterlife

There is a her shaped hole in this world
A black void
If you look hard enough you can still see the sparkles of the departed
Black diamonds of the afterlife
The entrance left open 
In case he needs to follow 

It's not in the leaving she said
It's in the living once I'm dead

The cold cold bed Sat in our room
The silence in the telephone
This is what the worst will be
The carrying on without me

It isn't in the leaving she sighs
It's in the knowing I didn't survive

She asked him once to be brave
Carry on forget her name
Give some meaning to his life
Leave behind the cold dead wife

How can you love me she asked
When all I want is to depart
How am I faithfully yours she cried
He just looked at her and sighed

It isn't in the leaving she cried
It's in the living once I've died
Where I'm going has no name
The darkness consumes me again and again

I'll wait for you she said
She promised as in life and death

I warned you along the way she said
I tried to make you see
I never belonged to your world 
I was never truly me
I belong to the nether world
I was put here by mistake
I'm waiting for it to draw me back
To take again my place

This is what she's seeing there
He's too used up to even care
Watching his restless nights and days
Keeping the haunting mind at bay
The last vision in his head is his wife hanging above the bed


Details | Rhyme | |

Clear Thinking On A Cloudy Day

Memories like you dont always shine true.
Nor do old places hold that magic.
In a life so short.
That seems so traggic.

Im thinking of forever  while slowley fading  away.
Oh such clear thinking  on a cloudy day.

A summer ago is when we met.
So far now it seems.
Yet the still my heart holds no regret.

The poetry you inspired apon this very page.
Is ment to complment a love without age.

Early morning memories that you've lent.
Is simpley a dream of time well spent.

A dark sky hides the sunlights ray.
Such is the clear thinking on such 
a cloudy day.

Im not blind yet for years   
hope has went unseen.
Sometimes age can taint a sweet dream.

Turning bitter the once colorful
fruit.
Killing wonder straight at the root.

A love like our's has kept with change.
And grown in definance.
Like a silly game.
We formed this this passion swept Alliance.

First with love you must blindly fall.
Then you must try to run when you
can bareley crawl.

To outlast the storms is to stand against the wind.
To ignor friends and to put trust in 
a stranger and depend.

Many thoughts run through my head.
In the early morning as she lay against me
in bed.

A heart has many rivers a soul is a endless sea.
As we apart we are caged.
While togather we are free.

From this loves eternal bliss  my heart should never 
stray.
As i sit clear is my thinking on such a  cloudy day.


Details | Lyric | |

Last Sunday

Rainy Sunday morning lying in bed
Stroking your hair, watching you sleep
My heart beating every beat for you
The way it used to


The train rumbles by waking you
Your sleepy eyes look up at me
I wrap my arms around you
The way I used to


Sitting having tea, enjoying the company
Talking about life and the rain
I can’t take my eyes off you
The way I used to


You lean against me, cuddling up tight
I hold you closely against me
Kindly, gently, comforting you
The way I used to


You lead me by the hand to your bedroom
We undress, kissing passionately, desperately
We hold on tightly and make love
The way we used to


Details | Rhyme | |

Never Forgive Me

                     I am alone
                     I am bored
                     I had enough
                     I want more

Why can't I live without you
Why can't I forget loving you
I run through the night streets
I pick fights just to get beat
You think I won't forgive you
If it was only that simple to do
For what you can't seem to see
Is I can't... never forgive me

I have no friends
I have no family
I party without pity
Being in a glazed faze
Hell is all I raise

                     I am alone
                     I am bored
                     I had enough
                     I want more

Promises spoken only to deceive
Promises broken I foolishly believed
Nothing last forever nothing stays the same
True love ends when only one remains
People change People leave
People hate People bleed
People hurt People pain
Never never change

                      I am alone
                      I am bored
                      I had enough
                      I want more

I miss you terribly
I miss you miserably
I miss you more and more

                       Turn off the light
                       Turn on the night
                       Let me dwell in
                       My self pity skin

You think I won't forgive you
If it was only that simple to do
For what you can't seem to see
Is I can't...never forgive me



Details | Rhyme | |

Self Love

They say you cannot love someone if you do not love yourself
But loving yourself has nothing to do with feeling for someone else
I know because I spent many years severely hating myself
But I often felt deep love for friends I considered to be top shelf
They inspired love in my heart, which for myself was not ever true
I always wondered why when they would earnestly say "I love you"
In my mind I did not deserve love but with them that was not true
To love myself was something for me that always was taboo
You cannot force love on someone, this has always been true
But what do you do when the person you can't love seems to always be you

A poem about my past. I no longer feel this way.


Details | Rhyme | |

Forever and a Day

I woke up this morning 
thinking of you 
reached for your warmth 
as I always would do. 
Your side of the bed 
was empty with fold
pillows in place 
untouched and cold. 
I did not smell coffee 
the news was not on 
things seem so different 
since you are gone. 
Your sweet smelling scent 
is fading away 
so I cling to your memory 
in every possible way. 
Motivating myself 
is a struggle to do 
hard to see sunshine 
when feeling so blue. 
They say it gets better 
as time goes by 
to look for the good 
at least give it a try. 
Something happened 
at work today 
I started to call you 
right away. 
Sadly remembering 
I hung up the phone 
you were not there 
God took you home. 
My heart is hurting 
my soul cries with pain
I've got nothing to lose 
got nothing to gain. 
Time is one asset 
I have plenty to spare 
holding on tight 
going nowhere. 
I'm looking for good 
as I have been told 
reaching for warmth
yet, shiver with cold. 
Darling, I miss you 
in every way 
and still loving you 
"Forever and a Day." 

 

 


Details | Ballade | |

Pretty Paper Doll

You scowl in anger as I turn to go,
   Your gemstone eyes so full of jealous heat;
You do not understand, and cannot know
   The thoughts that turn my head and guide my feet.
The image which you have is incomplete,
   And so by definition soon will fall.
Your views are suffocating -- obsolete --
   I will not be your pretty paper doll.

I will not bend my head or stoop down low
   To make myself a mindless slab of meat,
Or let my soul be shaken to and fro
   To lose itself and crouch beneath your seat.
Would you deny my voice to hear the bleat
   Of brainless chatter, just to watch me crawl
To bed and spread my legs beneath your sheet?
   I will not be your pretty paper doll.

An ever-changing wind will come and blow
   Through Winter, Spring, and Summer, in the street;
And restless waters will forever flow,
   Their colors cool, their textures smooth and sweet;
Yet you would change the pulsing, throbbing beat
   Of Life and Love, to answer ev'ry call.
Mistakes made in the past, you would repeat --
   I will not be your pretty paper doll.

Your mental boxes, always stacked and neat,
   Have packed my essence up against a wall.
Take care, my love -- this gypsy heart is fleet;
   I will not be your pretty paper doll.


Details | Blank verse | |

Blue Moon

     
       I'm lost inside your world...
       Hang on every word...
       A love I can't afford...
       I breaks my heart...
       Sapping my hopes..
       Draining my dreams...
       I live my life in a constant
       daze...
       Confused,bewitched and
       bewildered...
       Hot under the collar...
       My love is far too young...
       It's painfully naive..
       For a man matured in years..
       I worry...
       About the money...
       Living faraway from friends...
       about the years I have not got...
       And yes I love too much..
       Your always on my mind...
       Not to sure if that's healthy...
       You make me feel ten feet tall...
       And then I fall..
       Or hit the wall...
       I am a fool...
       For believing dreams come true..
       They only make you blue...   
           


Details | I do not know? | |

But You Do Lie

Laying here in my bed
Listening to your deep and shallow breath
Such a smooth and calm sound
I roll over and lay a hand on your chest
Too much movement it seems
For you rolled onto your side
As I steal my hand away
I close my eyes and try not to cry
I get out of bed and move to the couch
I lay there in silence, smoke in hand
I try and calm my pounding heart
Finally drifting off to dream land
I wake with a start
A gasp caught in my chest
I feel strong arms gently squeeze
And a warm hand on my breast
I stiffen with fear
Until you softly say my name
The tension slowly ebbing
Until calmness has the reigns
You kiss the back of my neck
In that slow and sensual way
Repeating my name in a whisper
A game you know how to play
You gently roll me over
And take my head in your hands
You kiss my forehead lightly
The beginning of a dance
You gaze at me deeply
And said “I love you so much I can’t stand it”
You begin kissing my eyes and lips
Stealing like a bandit
I take you in my arms
And feel my insides quake
You run your fingers through my hair
Giving it a little shake
You pull away from me slowly
And looked deeply in my eyes
I blush and turn away
I don’t want to see any lies
You lay down behind me
And hold me so very tight
And then you said those words
I dream of every night
“You are all I ever wanted,
You are all I’ll ever need,
I’ll do anything you want me to,
Just spend your life with me”
I don’t know why I did it
But I begin to cry
He pulls me even closer
“I love you, Trust me I don’t lie”
I can feel myself roll over
What happens next, who knows
For I awake with a start
The tears still soaking into my pillow
I finally get my bearing
Everything is as it seems
It turns out you do lie
But only in my dreams


Details | Rhyme | |

AUTUMN BLAZE

Autumn blaze
All the glory of rainbow leaves
Brisk dancing air of joyous breeze
Our captured moments.. enchanted time

Held your hand
Gently pulled you near to me
Felt your breath your heart was free
Browns eyes sparkled to our rhyme

So in love
Autumn fire we felt the heat
Entwined spirits now complete
Evening magic.. But morning came

In the light
The night's wild wonder wasn't clear 
I was too young and so full of fear
I'd promised forever.. then let you go

It's colder now
The years have passed the night is long
I often muse on our sweet autumn song
I said forever.. and I wasn't wrong
Because I never really let you go

I close my eyes
And they meet yours.. We're back again
I'm bolder now, wish we were young again
Because I never really let you go

Date: 7-3-14


Details | Free verse | |

Drowning in a box of condoms

    I'm a virgin. 
 Yet I'm a peer educator 
  I teach people about sex
    and how to put on the condom.
    sometimes the irony does bother me
 There's an endless supply of condoms 
     in my custody daily yet I have no need for them
     You should see the eager faces of the kids  
    grabbing them out of boxes like their gods best made gift
      I can't share in their glory 
      all I can do is watch 
        I hate  watching
         I'm mostly a doer not a witness
         So in this case I just feel out of place
             out of context
              Lost? Not exactly
              Cause i'm not exactly a saint
                  I probably know more than the one's who are active
                   which makes the irony even more ridiculous. 
                        But I guess it's just that need to be in with the crowd 
                            The need to feel like I belong
                               Less and less virgin's hang around these parts
                                   I'm starting to feel like i'm the only one left
                                             like i'm waiting for nothing. 
                                                         The condom box is calling out to me
                                                          The multiple flavors tempt me to taste. 
                                                                     Yet i'm still me. Therefore i'm lame. 
                                                                     Therefore i'm waiting...
                                                                    For what i'm not even sure anymore.
                                                                    I though it was because I was looking for the right guy 
                                                                     Maybe i'm just inept in this area. 
                                                    LoL that's a laugh. My body knows I'd  be a champ.
                                                                  But it also listens to my head. 
                                                                               Maybe that's what's the problem.
                                                                               Who knows? 
                                                                All I know is that i'm drowning in a box of condoms. 


Details | Rhyme | |

holokauston Page 1 of 2

Around that table, picture the scene
Self appointed leaders if you know what I mean
What were the topics on the Agenda that day
The Jewish race is about to pay

Who gave the right for this decision that's made
Who has the right to cleanse and degrade
To decide who lived, to decide who dies
Another chapter, I still wonder why

They came in the day they came in the night
Women and children pulled out of sight
Herded aboard like cattle and sheep
Many a family awoke from their sleep

Dazed and confused as they are taken away
Where will they be at the end of the day
From their warm houses and their warm beds
What must be going through their heads

As they travel through days and through the night
Up ahead, they see lots of lights
They depart the trucks and board the train
Their faces scared under the strain

Asking questions from family and others
Generations, sisters and brothers
Why are we here, where are we going
Windowless carriages with no way of knowing

We come to a stop, soldiers aplenty
Towers and wire, topped with sentries
What can this place be they have taken us to
As we head to large gates as they shuffle us through

Families separated, herded in file
Women and children, not one did smile
Taken to rooms where our heads were shaved
Is this the way humans behaved

Clothes discarded, as we enter the shower
No signs of water no signs of power
Doors slammed as we are all crammed in
History will recall this evil of sins

As we stand in the dark, chanting Jewish faith
Can hear the voices can't see the face
Noises above, do the showers start
The event has begun that tells us Humans apart

Questions and sighs, as walled vents show daylight
Some thing is falling then their slammed tight
A strange aroma starts to fill the air
As all around are screams of despair

Twenty minutes have passed and the quietness is rife
Two thousand people, two thousand lives
Pellets called HCN, or Hydrogen Cyanide
Contribute to this Genocide


http://www.thehighlanderspoems.com/war-2.php


Details | Rhyme | |

Lamentable You

Hell seemed to encompass the land As I watched him holding your hand For a moment I was happy for you And then my shameful heart gave way Earth longed to suck me in its waters Above fellow demons and their hollers We rue the day we ever existed Longing for the touch of human flesh We were trained to eat at your souls To fill your poor deprived holes With filth and emaciated sin Slithering within…bellowing within… And when I look at him I know he’s yours I should have seen it coming of course You never wanted a nothing like me And someone is to blame I see The voices in your head made you cower You once were awed by my power But now the beauty of love has destroyed us I am nothing, and he is yours Take her you bastard of a fool! I don’t need anyone, for I will rule I will rule over her vessel And mark me, she will detest you! Remarkable as she is you will leave her While I in the darkness keep her But for now I’ll lie in wait For the perfect time to ensnare Let go of his hands And allow this heart a chance Let the man lose his compass Only to stumble upon a new woman Oh, lamentable you! I force your love to be true Kiss me, my hate—my love, you fool! He’s never coming back for you! Because you are not special You belong to nobody—nothing! And you shall find That you were always… MINE.


Details | Rhyme | |

I thought I knew better

Three years ago, we started from nothing

Nothing at all, just us and the will to go on

We worked and we worked, we fought for each other

Stood up alone and together, looking out for one another

But early last year we got off track

We got lazy and bored, it was resistance we lacked

As time wandered on our lives became sour

We need each other but only for a few hours

Then life turned upside down and everything was broken

What was real became haunted, we felt close to choking

So here we are now in the same situation

Problem is now that we don’t have us, different sensation

Now what do we do, which way do we turn, where do we go

I miss what we had; I regret every move now even more so


Details | Free verse | |

Hawk's Eyes

in the bright light of day you appeared...
a gilded angel with falcon wings,
you rose up out of the desert sands 
and your gentle beauty struck me dumb - 
sending a tremor through my soul...

marvelling, pretending an air of studied uncaring 
i watched you through a veil of wind-blown hair 
and tried to ignore the yearning sighs of the 
blood in my veins, 
and the keening of a heart that was broken - 
that, seeing you, healed briefly - 
only to fracture again every time you turned away

you were fatal...
i knew this in my marrow, even as i stared, 
riveted, at your cherub's innocence, 
suffocating, slowly - sweetly - 
in the decadent gold-striated hazel of your 
hawk's eyes
you were a killing blow out of the blue, 
and once again i was lost...

"angel" i wanted to cry, "angel, ask my name..."
but, naive as Adam, you lost yourself in the bustle 
and sand-blasted clamor of your clawed companions...
bereft i hovered, a lonely kestrel riding the chill wind 
of your ignorance...
a single tear slid down my cheek; 
oh i would have impaled myself on a thousand spears, 
if it would only make you run to my side 
and scoop me into your bronze embrace

but time slid by and planets shifted - 
the day's end drew near...
desert dunes dissolved into the hazy purple of night,
and i was forced to say goodbye; 
to pretend love at first sight was just a giddy adolescent joke, 
and that your image wasn't tattooed on my heart 
in blood and fire...
only then, as my soul swelled with the bitter bile of 
disappointment, did you turn and behold 
the torment of your beauty written on my face...

boyish, innocent, your eyes clashed with mine - 
and melted my core to lava - 
and gave my battered heart wings; 
clipped wings perhaps, but wings nonetheless...
you smiled, a saccharine-coated admission of acknowledgement, 
even as your eyes stabbed cruelly, violated my bruised soul, 
and the sun set at your back - 
gilding you in demonic flame...
and in a blazing flash, that was it, the die was cast, 
reeling, bleeding, i broke our searing gaze;
'angel you may be, my oblivious love,'
i thought as i walked away 
'but devil you are for wounding me this way - 
and never even knowing my name'


Details | Sonnet | |

The feeble heart

You wish to reach the deepest parts of me
To lure the abandoned child from her eternal sleep
To protect my shrouded frailty and soothe the storm within
But through no fault of my own, I could never truly let you in
You will underestimate my devotion, and burden my heart
Shatter my delicate trust, and at your hands, I'll surely fall apart
It would be wise for me to forget
Your eyes, your arms, your lips upon my neck
The heart knows no rationale, unlike the mind
But it holds the answers that logic unceasingly struggles to find
It's in my nature, it has always been my way
To seek comfort in solitary darkness, I find no refuge in the light of day
In my earliest years I discovered that no matter which love I chose
Far too many thorns mar a single rose


Details | Blank verse | |

Love Song

Here’s what I’m thinking now 
at the end of the world: 

There are no atheists in foxholes— 
no theists in politics. 
If knowledge is power, 
and power corrupts, 
then why did I bother reading you, Cicero? 

Does it matter that I didn't’t love you? 
Would it have mattered if I did? 

There’s a poetry reading tonight 
whence I’I'll chide other poets 
who don’t sit alone. 
I won’t bring up death 
but I might have to breathe, 
even into a mike 
and mouth lines to get a snap or a boo 
maybe even a wince or two. 

Just maybe I’I'll talk about love 
and how following your heart is like following a dog— 
it only leads to vittles and (female dogs). 
But how many times have I used that line 
since the story I wrote about you, 
a witty and sexy and fictional you? 
Most likely I’I'll read something tonight about you. 

I won’t recite it from memory 
because I don’t think about you that much anymore, 
not even when I search for my socks in your drawer 
or when I put on the scratchy sweaters you give me, 
horizontally striped to bring out my eyes? 

I don’t remember your eyes 
except they are blue. 
And I don’t remember you, 
not even when I smell cucumber and apple, 
not even when I sleep on my side of the bed 
or when you walk through the door 
happy to see me; 
even then I don’t remember you. 
Does it matter that I don’t love you? 
Would it have mattered if I did? 

How about a few one-liners 
for the end of days?— 

Depression is self-awareness, 
which you’d know if you were; 
I need Ritalin to listen to you, 
Lithium to hug you, 
Viagra to feel you, 
and Valium to sleep. 

All you need 
is me standing there, waiting at home 
with turns of phrase and word plays 
telling you about why I hate Ayn Rand 
but want to buy as much as I can 
and how I love celebrity gossip 
and detest poetry slams 
and find rhyming trite 
except when I am. 

Hypocrites can still be right, 
which you do understand 
because you nod at my nonsense 
about fighting the man. 

But now, at the end of all things— 
I’m speechless and witless and pointlessly well-read, 
and you’re just sitting there, smiling 
asking me to pass the bread.


Details | Rhyme | |

THESE LIPS ARE TO COLD TO KISS

Time, is combined, in my mind.
Tragedy trickles to nowhere,
And now this pain I bare.
Seeing you for your worth,
Hearing you are only earth.
Killing, and filling, this feeling.
Lame, losers look like you.
Now this heart you threw,
Up on, and left the mess.
So this is progress?
Torture, under, this blur.
Blindsided by big, bountiful, beams,
That left me in shattered dreams.
Never thought I could catch this,
Because these lips are to cold to kiss.


Details | I do not know? | |

Stupid Girl

My mind said its ok 
I let you in and of course you went away
Of course 
A girl so stupid
Again
Listening to the words
That were promised in vain
But I wanted to believe
But I knew you would leave
So why am I so surprised
Even when I close my eyes
You’re still gone
Feeling so stupid again
Why oh why did I let you in
Maybe I needed something
That he couldn’t give
Maybe I needed something
Or a different life to live
But here I am still in limbo
And hating myself 
And trying to let you go
Trying to let my mind 
Go back and rewind
To where I was before 
Alone and lonely 
Safe and sound
Just walking around
And knowing my 
Soul may never be found


Details | I do not know? | |

Alone I Stand

In frozen ivory towers and burning dungeons
The inescapable truth is that in the darkness
Even your shadow leaves you
Stare at the abyss and the void fills you
Your mind trapped as you hide your black-hole heart
Shadows lurking out of sight
Manifestations surround you
the journey of the hopeless soul
Is it a lesson that must be endured
To make the heart steady
So that when you reach the end
You truly appreciate how bad it could have been
And what you’re capable of
So that you know that you all need
Is your beating heart and nothing else
Just you
Believing in a dream..
Something that
The darkness
Can’t touch.


Details | Rhyme | |

13 things about you, I hate

 
 
 13 things about you I hate
 
I hate how you stare
I hate that you care,
I hate how you smile…
Looking at me all the while.
 
I hate that you’re bad 
I hate how you’re sweet
I hate how you look at me…
Every time we meet,
Ooh! I hate the way you stand!
And the way you demand!
 
I hate when you’re sorry
Even more when you worry,
I hate the way you get me when no one else can
I hate how I hate and how I can’t understand.
 
I hate that you think I hate stuff about you
But don’t actually hate you…
I hate even more…
How that’s completely true.

I hate how the things you do make me feel
I hate how they’re not in my head
I hate that they’re real.

I hate so much how I feel about everything you do
I hate that I…
Might actually…
Love you. 









Details | Lyric | |

Borderline's Wreckage

I'm Agonizing every Word that my mind Creates You've done this all to me release your wrath to Me You wonder How much a Human Heart can take I've reached the limit You've invaded me on every level none of this is Mine anymore I can't bleed enough for You We're through This, This Torture Homicidal With You Suicidal Without You Feel Free to abuse If it's you I won't lose The Winds push away The Vines pull forth I'm at a lose on what to do So very lost and Confused Don't say we're through Homicidal With You Suicidal Without You I Hate you ...Don't leave me I push you so far away But need you so close I'm on the edge you're all I really need I'll do anything Just don't Abandoned me leaving has it's toll Homicidal With You Suicidal Without You


Details | Ode | |

The Unknown Poet n' the Lover with an Immortal Heart (Part 5 Final)

This new born day I celebrate your souls release from guilt n’ captivity since that day you 
felt a carnal touch of sin within as your hands played poetically upon the curves of your dead 
lover’s silken skin…
I know now  you made your way to the top of the rocks to plant a tree to guard this sacred 
place where I fell from thee n’ you repeated the poetic chant of love’s abandoning to follow 
me into our karmic destiny…

On that fateful day your soul bled away at the top of this crest by a solitary juvenile tree, 
your body of words fell to the rocks at the base of this cliff, embroidered into the blood of 
me…
The one who would hold a feather to her face on this crest by the sea n’ remember finally 
the days gone by of you n’ me, our deaths from love’s abandoning when you my love were 
lost to this world n’ me for ten centuries…

I now await destiny as we will love forever more with immortal hearts…


Details | Lyric | |

All I'll Have Left

Lately I’ve been thinking about our love affair
And I’ve come to the conclusion we’re not getting anywhere
And, Darling, though I love you with all of my heart
I think the end is here and it’s time for us to part

Why is it so hard to say good-bye
Even though I know it has to be
It’s simply because I’m losing everything
And all that I’ll have left is me

When we first got together I was looking for a friend
But it turned into a love that I thought would never end
And now the time has come to go our separate ways
We danced to the piper’s music, but now it’s time to pay

Why is it so hard to say good-bye
Even though I know it has to be
It’s simply because I’ve given up my soul
And all that I’ll have left is me

I guess I always knew that it would have to be this way
But I was never looking forward to this day
Now as you turn to leave tears fall from my eyes
And all I want to do is crawl away and die

Why is it so hard to say good-bye
Even though I know it has to be
It’s simply because you’re taking all I am
And all that I’ll have left is me


Details | Lyric | |

To the Sea

To The Sea 

Sea, 
I look to you 
For answers 
To the questions that swirl like your currents in my mind 
Are you as unfathomable as my heart? 
Do your swells exceed the passions rising within me? 
Does your churning and pounding match the rhythm of my pulse? 
Is your water as cold as the loneliness here? 
Does the salt you contain taste the same as my tears? 
Does your thunderous crashing on rocks at the shore 
Equal the tempest that rages in my soul? 
Do you harbor secrets in your depths as I do? 
Are you roiling below the surface with anticipation? 
Do you long for a visitor to break the horizon... 
As I long for my Love? 
Does the wail that rises from your hollow reefs 
Blend with the plaintive cry from my lips? 
Can the overture played on your delicate shells 
Drown out the sound of my siren song? 
Sea, I have loved you, Sea, I have known you... 
We feel the same, we sound the same 
We give the same, we take the same 
We are one 
And the same 
You and I, 
Your mournful soulmate 




© Copyright Donna Golden July 10, 1999


Details | Free verse | |

Get Out of My Face!

Get Out of My Face!

What brought all of that on?
Award?  This is not a movie!
Who cares about a stupid award?
And how dare you judge me like that?
You must have lost your brains –
Yes, I see them now!
Right in front of your face
Floating around in the bubble
On your head!  
And you say you love me.
Yeah, right!
And since when did this spaceship
Become yours?  Get a grip.
You want me off of this rust trap?
Right after you, baby!
Oh, who made you judge and jury?
You do not even know what love is.
You are a suck-up.
But you just lost your brownie points.
Do you call screaming at a cohort?
“Love of humanity”
I see it again!
Grey matter scrambled like eggs.  Yum!
I remember when –
You used to eat men alive and brag.
Have you really changed all that much?
You still gloat with words?
Even now, you think you have won.
My dear raging “Power hog”,
Turn the light bulb on…think!
We are in deep space.
What do you think 
Will happen to your prize, 
If I do get off?
I can see it now.
You, Spaceman of the Year,
Worming your way out of the spot light
When T.S. asks you,
“What happened? 
That cute Elaine Justice disappeared?”
Um, well, a…she left the ship.
Really now?
And why was that?
Imagine stumbling your egocentric-self
Right out of your award.
Genuinely, who really cares?
Not I! Said the woman
That still had her brains.
It is time for you to get off.
Love of humanity, or me for that matter,
Is something you know nothing
About…Now, get out of my face!

© Dane Ann Smith-Johnsen
May 20, 2010
Poetic form:  Free Verse


Details | Rhyme | |

honest reflections of a manogre

A small patch of flowers, a mountain top glade
slapped into twirls of magenta by cold rain~
voiceless but pleading for the purity of truth
to be taken by {a} tender into the beating of dawn

In sundream they'll play,black butterly and fawnheart
tempering time untill dusk makes the crows bark,
cackling where was the {us} when living turned to blood
drowned the frolick of every prayer for tomorrow-

was it a chain of slanted decisions,that minced the light
bad luck (as when a dime slides from the ritze to the grate...
maybe we met long ago, when we crawled from the sea
took different directions by the will of a rogue breeze

maybe we had parallel lives? 
made from the bones of wild planets of fire

what happens when magenta meets black and blue
[this is a good time to dust of the pallet-start mixing the hues],
what colors do a rabid cyclone leave behind
the texture of twisted stars, 
to be swallowed by the devil of devine? 

young butterfly remembers the innocense of light,
when moonglow made love to the black lips of night.
'till a pack of knives slashed at its wings
(ta hell with the good fight).
..now it no longer searches for mountain top flowers,
or dreams in pools of magenta- 
it lies in the mud juggling broken eggs
upon a pile of old dung-
how in the hell can such a thing... love 
again.
but their is a softness buried deep 
in this blaze of a runaway train
hop on board 
if you will but never again lose your legs
or follow the reflection of manogre...

to be cont.   


Details | I do not know? | |

Pretty Girls

This is for all you pretty girls,
with necks choked with ashen pearls,
and pricy shoes on your feet,
and pinned up golden tresses,
and virginal white dresses,
ready to make love complete.

Now when the wedding bells chime,
it will be an ideal time,
to think of the one you tossed.
The one who bled true passion
and whose love he would fashion.
The good one, whose heart was crossed.

And it is for your own sake,
when you taste that angel cake,
to think of the one not chosen.
There's a gem on your finger,
but you know something lingers,
and thoughts of me are frozen


Details | Lyric | |

Why Must It Be

Can I let you go? Will you be okay? Where you're headed now...to a better place Listen to my words of forgiveness relieving this pain I'd give anything to have you back again To hold you once more in my arms, one more day of happiness you now dwell within my heart Your innocent smile is forever a distant memory, and the times that we share are precious treasures that I spend reliving The Shadow of Death Took you in just one breath Why must it be? I cry behind this closed door, searching desperately for an answer, yet all I feel is an emptiness inside... despair haunts me forevermore Why did you have to go? Why did you have to leave? Why does this have to hurt? Cancer robbed thy life from thee... Why must it be? Fly away Angel Child of Mine Trod thy broken paths, roam away, fly and be free... Why must it be?


Details | Free verse | |

A Red Thousand

His portrait on the knave-
defining royalty, a smile aglow
Ravenous heart,
stone cold.

Bestowing a brush to the paper lips
Leadeth my knees to collapse, a kneel
Feet chained to his heart, eyes in eclipse
A combusting irritation to the feel

Rouge chaps his glass cheek-
Crows whirring in his eyes extend
A smile grim, tapestry lips,
kissed a red thousand.

Thy lips hath burnt mine-
defriends my patience,
beheads my mind.


Details | Couplet | |

Insanity

You say you want me to be free,
but really you just don't want me. 

Now i'm drowning in my pain,
standing in the pouring rain. 

How this fell apart is such a shame.
You made this in to some game. 

You were just in it because you had some thing to gain.
Your lies are driving me insane.


Details | Free verse | |

I Can't

I wanted to forget you and forgive…
But the days
Never passed fast enough!
Scourging days 
Of pain and misery
That only made me feel
So sorry for this 
Sorrowful self of mine…
I can’t… 
I guess I never really moved on.
I know we still talk,
But it’s never quite the same!
Going back now
Seems like certain death!
… Perhaps that is the best option:
Going back each night,
In my thoughts,
So I could die some more
With every tear I shed.
I can’t….
But I admit it now:
There is no love for my kind!


© 2009 Stefania Carmen Misaila


Details | Free verse | |

Make Me Hate Your Face

I focus on things
that make me hate your face.
Maybe then the pain will fade.

I know deep inside
I care about your life,
but right now I just want to forget.

You don't understand,
never will,
how you've pierced my heart.

I wish I could say
it will just go away,
but the blade cut too deep.

I feel the blood,
it trickles down my chest,
and it draws me to my knees.

I fall to the floor,
pray it will all finish now,
maybe this pain will finally be undone.


Details | Free verse | |

Nightmare

I'm working through the night
so I won't fall asleep
for every time I do,
into my dreams you seep
the one that broke my heart
the one that saw me feel
the only one I love
the one that was too real.
I'll concentrate on life
without it's summer days,
the winter in my heart,
beats sunburn on my face.
The cold wont reach my skin,
the sunny smile prevails,
it hides from all the world
my blackend, charred remains.
You'll never see me hurt,
I'm much too proud for pain,
I'd rather die inside,
Then let you know you've maimed.


Details | Rhyme | |

holokauston Page 2 of 2

After the quiet we all have to go
Dragged and carted by the Sonderkommando
To be dumped in pits covered by lime
A race to dispose by it's Human slime

Auschwitz, Buchenwald & Dachau slaughtered
Many a son, many a daughter
Experiments on children women and men
Some aged 90, many under 10

In 45, their end was near, how many alive would reappear
As Russians, British and US troops
Chased the Hun to their German roots
Each camp reached showed it's sordid past
Where millions of me, were massively gassed

In Auschwitz, to this present day
Birds don't fly, no animals play
The reminder is all for there to see
Those terrible days what happened to me

It's 1948, our Nation is born
From histories past, populations torn
To all who survived I wish you well
And our new born world, called Israel 


http://www.thehighlanderspoems.com/war-2.php


Details | Sonnet | |

OUR MIDNIGHT PLACE

 OUR MIDNIGHT PLACE
As certain as the rains do fall in spring,
will be my love, for you to have and hold,
and know you now--my rain of love will bring
to you, all joy of which all love is told.

No one could ever count the drops that fall,
and so is put together, love for you,
numbers cannot be given them at all,
though put together, one is what will do.

And every single drop adds beauty there
to something we can call a rainy day,
to fill with love, made up, from everywhere,
the drops of life that make love what we say.

Our midnight place, your front porch, dreaming of
each drop of rain that's filled with so much love.
© ron wilson aka vee bdosa


Details | Rhyme | |

Love None The Less

She captured my heart for a blessed moment in time.
Everything seems new.
Now even words seem hollow as the lines to this rhyme.

Hands togather I held a chance at something so very true.
Strong are the arms.
That held on to all but you.

Such a strong  appearence  so many feeling I conceal
Please dont look  into my eyes.
Cause my broken heart will reveal.

As the pain is a unending  stress.
What is this agony
So many names is love none the less.

She takes my day.
every second  she haunts my thoughts.
Keeping my heart from so very far away.

To understand anothers heart  we can only guess.
call me a joke if you must.
But a lost soul craves love none the less.


Details | Rhyme | |

Non-Toxic Love

Non-Toxic Love

Pecking order glances
Destroys friendship chances
Dissolves love, annuls romances.

Surviving smart as a fox…
Smooths that road of hard knocks…
So step out of the box.

Live above mental kicks.
Care, without verbal pricks,
Strengthen homes made of sticks.

Avoid hot gossiping lips
Prevent ill judger's grips.
Watch the evil one do flips.

Find peace with the white dove.
Be sheltered by God above.
Receive His gift… non-toxic love.


© Dane Ann Smith-Johnsen
January 22, 2010

Poetic form: Rhyme


Details | I do not know? | |

Breaking Point

Come on and break me down
finding the spot not yet found
as you tear my knees to the ground 
wearing arrogance as if its your crown
as if its life
as if a right, that's yet been unspoken
can heal this heart too often broken
twisting like a knife
breaking through my souls skin
leaving me alone and twisted
erasing my rules never before listed 
all caught up in this sin
of which I can't escape 
of which I can't win


Details | Rhyme | |

All You'll Never Get Back

Walks down by the harbor.
That cafe where are table still waits.
Times spent alone  with you were golden.
So much more than just forgettable dates.

She knew what I could not understand.
Time is a gift.
A kiss of a raindrop is never ment to be kept in hand.

The steps of that  old church still look out onto 
the street.
Snow and time wash away the impressions.
Leaving only traces to every stranger I never truly meet.

Did it just disappear causing us to somehow lose track.
Does it seem pathetic.
To yern for all you'll never get back.

Couples see through me as easily as a ghost.
Maybe I should ramble.
But my soul will forever be attached to the coast.

Forgotten confessions are empty as to the city streets I tell.
How the young become old and bitter.
As reality shines through to show Im no longer under your spell.

For the night seems to gather the broken in a misfit pack.
Streetlights cast shadows that loom and hide.
As into a stranger I confide.
Dull has become the wit once sharp as a tack.
As I wonder do you ever reflect apon all you'll never get back.


Details | Rhyme | |

I disappear

I loose my self
in myself
and fear
often times
I disappear
not always so
as youth
as man
young the heart
i still could stand
outside gates
in every core
but weak
I hide now
close the door
peer out through
the looming night
see the man
who sits outside
empty of
his other part
hiding in
the lonely heart
I loose my self
and then I fear
you've lost a part
of me
in tears
one drop containing
each a piece
of what you thought
your love would be
I fail
I will, be lost sometimes
gone in fancies
of my crime
penance for
and from the slave
I am now, lost
in other days
I fear
too often
worry much
ten million thoughts
I can not clutch
like a fighter
seeing three
head shot punch
witch one is me
I loose myself
myself I fear
will loose you
when I disappear






 


Details | Free verse | |

Elevators: 5 Horsemen

Part 1

Onion

the delicacy of friendship

I found you in the flowers
Standing tall we become one
Looking down from gangly towers
Squash, you burn, you pillage, son.

Follow me you say in tongues
Thy shallow mind reveal me tell
Whisper lies clean load the guns
I feel the burn I rot in hell

Friend folly menacing the liar
I loathe this coffin how it leaks
Dear foe you raped me set on fire
The onion peal itself and weeps

Part 2

Traitor

dear monkey boy

Older eyes eat themselves,
glance and kill the other
Unified in the dance,
they steer the musty rudder.

Pained and sweeter deeper wells,
poised buckets drunk with water.
Singled out the one that dried,
handed weights to pull him under.

Wiser times capture the mind,
death justifies dishonor.
Knife slice neat through the devil's back,
who stares blank and milks the udder.

Part 3

Tempest

patron saint

Inside this box
Goodbye tempestuous fall
My puppet of steel coiled thread
Smashed buttons and twisted dread,
Alarm these doors, and
Escape this delusive bunker bed

Stamp the spiders
Thief, vulture of the deflection
The mocking patron of the sinners
Erase this affliction
Relating inward at the reflection

Rise you fool

Part 4

Phoenix

i love you

close the grip
cinched hematic grip
drenched, clawing
seeking the sheave
becoming the counterweight

i absorb, now
extracting the heat
rise like a phoenix
away to be gone to be free
fix me! i have fixed me

i am alive and i love you

Part 5

Aye, Damager

Abolish her state of disrepair
Scattered, spattered drippy thoughts
All around this box of soused leaves
Soak, ferment in the faith of our love

I can't fix this, you know
I loathe this misunderstanding
Of what I am speaking, projecting
To me, Aye Damager, to you

This devil in me
turned and twisted
A wrecked elevator in rejection
Years locked painfully aware

...


Details | Rhyme | |

wasn't meant to be

through my heart,
you drag your claws,
you seemed so perfect,
even your flaws,

is it just me?
i can not tell,
is this heaven?
is it hell?

do i alone,
feel this way?
left to cry
day by day

could you feel
my pulse end
you left because
i wouldn't bend

eyes so cold 
heart so still
i give up
do what you will

as if my love
could keep you here,
you go and do
what i fear

could it be me
reading wrong
what i feel
oh so strong

from you
head to toe
telling me
to let you go?

hello soup loving people. i wrote this poem with my freind jezabella. enjoy


Details | Free verse | |

Core of glass

Whispered words curl greedily around my soul,
slipping slyly from your poisoned lips,
enveloping my being in your deception.
Delicately promising a love of pure decadence,
yet each word is laced with intricate malice,
barbed wire hatred masquerading  as rose petals.
Caught in webs of your lies,
silently pleading for insanity's solitude,
as I languish in your core of glass.


Details | Narrative | |

Stolen Soul

Your sad and your ugly
Worth not even a life
No good as a mother
Make a terrible wife

I love you my friend
You are my world
Can we make love?
As my skin crawled

So we got into bed
And I closed my eyes
A few minutes of torture
A few silent cries

He turned on his side 
When we were done
He shut the lights
Thanks, that was fun

A few moments later
He was asleep
I took a shower
Felt dirty and cheap

Every so often
There was no fight
I enjoyed the neglect
Just one easy night

On our tenth anniversary 
He said lets go away
We'll celebrate us
And we'll find our way

With naive dreams
I agreed with all smiles
To go on this trip
Just us for miles!

We laughed on the way
A few hours a lifetime
It was quite lovely
Until it reached nighttime

When we arrived
I put on my dress
Your to skinny he said
You look like a mess

So I opened my bag
And I had no doubt
A couple of these
Are just my way out

My hands felt the tingle
My head was now clear
I said I'll change
Will you be happy my dear?

Didn't remember that night
Then the sun would appear
And just as suspected
What would I hear

Get a hold of yourself
Your full of sorrow
You make me sick
I might love you tomorrow

With another day left 
I knew it would be rough
I'll just take one more
Then throw away the stuff

We drank that night
Then I think we got high
I loved him so much
For him I would die

We made love and the slept
Then when we awoke
From the first word I said 
Was enough to provoke

His veins were alive
His blood was on fire
So angry at nothing
Was it this I'd desire

Guess I don't have to tell you
It never has changed
He did this enough
Where my mind was derranged

Then one day it happened
I rose from the dead
I felt something different
When I got out of  bed

It suddenly hit me
I remembered my name
Now this was scary
Overwhelmed with shame

Ten years of today
Put my soul on display
To pick and to poke at
For this boy to play

A lot of wear on my body
But not quite yet broke
Put my pieces together
For I am no joke

My daughters a beauty
My son almost a man
I'll do it for them
I know that I can!

You cannot do it
You can't provide
If it wasn't for me
You would have died

Thats what he said
When we walked out the door
For the first time ever
I was honestly sure

Hope my story ends happy
Now that I'm in control
The rest is all mine
Forget the ten years he stole


Details | Free verse | |

"no wait...I can explain"

A girl
Leads an eager man to a cab beyond the door of drunken rants and soaked 
sorrows.
His lucky day it seems....his lucky day.
A kiss she lends with no resistance distracts them from the headlights that 
follow in the distance.
They arrive....

A man
Once oblivious to her ways watches as they stumble.
He knows now the answer of his questions....He had hoped them different.
Vengeance rules him.
He follows....

A couple.
Fumble with keys amid  passion and desire.
The door opens and she leads to a bed secretly shared with another.
His lucky day!
"what was that sound?" 

A cigarette
Burns slowly in the corner.
A man, a weapon, a hateful heart.
She reasons.
He tries to explain.
He fires.....



Details | Rhyme | |

Killing Me Softly

You come home late agian another time.
Smelling like cheap perfume and cheap red wine.
You caress my cheek with touches so soft.
Touching my shirt, slowly taking it off.

It isn't the first time you have done this.
Always coming home, face full of bliss.
I know what your doing, your touches are toxic.
But I love you so much, I feel helpless to stop it.

To be second rate, and feeling your fake passion.
Your killing me softly, your my hearts assassin.
This is all you want whenever you come home.
You get what you want, then leave me alone.

I just want you to love me like I do you.
But I'm in denial, as it wont come true.
You finally stop, but your too drunk to see.
All my tears that refuse to leave me.

You turn the other way, and go to bed.
No words uddered, nothing was said.
Apparently my soal, to you, isn't so caustly.
Because even you know your killing me softly. 


Details | Free verse | |

Dream Me In Black And White

Color me pretty
The way that you see me but not
The way I see myself

Wash me pure
The way you look at me
With eyes of unconditional love
You overlook my indiscretions
Judgment you never pass
Acceptance is all you offer
You make me a better me

Dream me in black and white
Like old time photographs
Faded
Torn edges
Jagged with time
To preserve the image that you hold of me

Paint me in red
The sweet blood that I left behind
Etching my name in the grain of eternity
So as to never be forgotten

Burn me into ashes
Let me dance on the winds of tomorrow
To feel the freedom
The release from my personal hell
As I soar across the sky of time


Details | Rhyme | |

Value

Others write of pleasure
whilst I write in pain
Some value life as a treasure
Those are the ones who are all too vain

Be happy for what you have
Yes, I am
but right at the moment
I find it hard to give a damn

I stay silent each day
and each night
Praying for my dreams to stay
but they disappear without a sight

Believe me I wish I could see
the positive side of things
but I can only see what made me
I see what true love brings

Not love for sensuality
Just protection
Maybe a little acknowledgement
or perhaps affection

Some write in pleasure
because they don't know pain
They value life, a treasure
Why are they so vain?


Details | Rhyme | |

Addiction's Folly

A grenade was placed inside my head to suspend me from my hobby.
The smoke did rise and choke my friends as I exited from the lobby.
A wicked shadow my path did cast that long lost working day,
it’s a shame I had to go insane and lead my peers astray.
Men did come to restrain my progress as I ripped apart their flesh,
what kind of force can stop a man who’s mind is made of mesh?
Within my mind I seek an answer to help reduce the strains,
it’s a shame, however, how I had to feast upon their brains.
I know not were to take my sorrow in such a lonely case,
perhaps I’ll have to find my mind and delay it’s quickened pace.
I am lost inside this endless world of multiple fixations,
but why the hell am I the one trapped in Cocaine’s stations.
There is no answer from above or anyone down below,
I can’t believe I cannot have just one last flake of snow.
My throat has dried to words my ears must cradle and then eat,
I cannot stand or even move, were the hell are both my feet?
Here I am to pay for all my addiction has destroyed,
it feels as if my skin does crawl as anger is deployed. 
I have slept with time and pondered long, finding a direction,
My heart is scared and bruised about, but only from reflection.
I cannot fix this broken basket I once called my mind,
I’ll never reach normality again; I’ll always be behind.
How could such a decent life be killed away by spite,
I stop and ask myself again but all I see is white.
The walls suck me in as I shiver from withdrawal,
my bones start to crack and itch as rejection starts to sprawl.
I have learned my lesson deep and wide to never use again,
but now I have to face the fact that I once did begin.


Details | Free verse | |

The Jester

The Jester puts on her smile,
Plastered to her make-up smeared face.
Bright lights blind her empty eyes.
She can see no one in the crowd.

Inside her mind,
She screams for release.
Twisting the head off her doll,
Blood runs down her cheeks.

Her hands gripped tightly around the neck of the doll,
She pulls as hard as she can.
No one’s around for miles;
They left her to die.

Smiles and laughs surround her,
Taunting her every move.
They tease and mock her,
Pointing out flaws.

How her hair sticks out;
How her tooth has a chip in it.
Her eyes go dark as she wishes them death.
Under her breath she curses.
They will never lead happy lives.
They will know what it’s like being a puppet.

Just a toy in a closet,
Thrown around like nothing.
She wants to rip them all apart,
Limb by limb till there’s nothing left.

In her mind she makes up stories.
Stories where she’s no longer the jester,
No longer do they laugh at her.

With bloodshot eyes,
She cranes her neck to the sky.
Her screams echo through the stadium,
Reverberating off the walls, 
Bouncing back to her ears,
Killing everything in its path.

She falls to the ground in a puff of dirt.
When it clears,
The Jester is nowhere to be found.


Details | Sonnet | |

FIRST KISS OF OUR LOVE

 FIRST KISS OF OUR LOVE
I've just some things I thought your heart should hear,
since they've been weighing heav'ly on my mind,
so list' and I shall whisper to thine ear
with all compassion my poor heart can find.

You've touched me deeply with the way you smile;
such lips could sooth the beast of anyone;
and spreading love with looks must be your style
for every time our eyes meet, love comes on.

Now I'm about to kiss the lips of you
for this first time, I pray the memory
shall linger on through years life takes us through,
together, as I'm certain this will be.

This first kiss of our love will never end
and changes whom you guessed was just your friend.
© RON WILSON AKA VEE BDOSA


Details | Dramatic Verse (Verse Drama) | |

Broken

Broken
So Broken
Like Shards of glass
I'm shattered
A million pieces scattered
 across the floor of my heart
Beating,
    Pulsing,
         Throbbing,
               for your love.
But I am not worthy
 for anyone's heart,
  much less yours.
For so long you were my heart
And now you are gone.
 I am dying
from the inside out
Like a knife carving its way out of my chest.
Blood trickles,
 as I leave this place.
Sweet release


Details | Rhyme | |

dreams of love

wings so light,
broken now,
hearts will bend,
love will bow,
til it breaks,
along with  me,
you are lost,
as love can be,
so we cry,
for the past,
and the joy,
that wouldn't last,
love is a lie,
thats what i say,
prove me wrong,
find a way,
if you can,
make me see,
what my own,
heart can be,
because i feel,
hollow and cold,
let the heat,
of flame take hold,
and bring out,
warmth in me,
heat that might,
set me free,
chilling stare,
calls me out,
i must fight,
back my doubt,
it's okay,
to let it go,
when the pain,
is all you know,
let me fall,
in waters deep,
mind is numb,
and i'm asleep,
now i dream,
of colors bright,
i will wish,
for love tonight.

spelling issues and butterflies. @};~


Details | Dramatic Verse (Verse Drama) | |

Sitting On the Dock With Rene

I left my home, it  wasn't  so gorgeous,
but I knew I could no longer stay
I had nothing to live for,
seemed like only sadness would come my way,
headed for any deep water bay,
sitten' on the edge of sadness,...
wasted by time.....time...

on the bay of grief and sadness
I sat and wondered aloud....
how can I feel so lonely....
even in the midst of a crowd?

sittin' on the dock of sadness bay
wearing my ......crow....crown.....

I was royal fodder for sorrow,
looked like just sh_t would be comin' to me
I wanted so much to hold him,
but somehow   fate would not let that be.....

so I'm sitten' on the fringe of cryin'....
every day.....ay, ay, ay, ay...

I'd whistle if I could...
and if it'd bring him to me
for just one more day...
but my throat is simply too.
clogged with tears
what can I say?

I sit on the riverbanks
of mighty river styx
the river I've longed to cross
so I could hold him once more...
but sadness has stranded me
here, on this lonely shore...

for Rene, my sister in sorrow,
among the millions of us in
the dark seas of grief....


Details | Free verse | |

Rental

I wish I had the video
of all your mental pictures
so I could see what that night 
looked like, where he
touched you and why
you let him in…
I want to watch the whole
damn thing, shades drawn,
sitting on the couch
with only a box of Kleenex – 
I heard the ending
is a real tear-jerker. 

Knowing me, I’d watch it
over and over 
and pause
at the 
exact 
moment
you said yes, 
trying to read 
the eyes that now
tell 
me
nothing.


Details | Rhyme | |

Friend Within Hear Me

I smell sweet country spring waves of many scents.
I tell of beauty of rolling hills, creating a valley.
I touch the love of my life, luckier than many gents.
I have spoken of my sorrows; I have nothing to tally.
My desires and dreams have faded with this maturity.
However, others have taken shape to which I follow.
I need to hear that I have learned from the majority.
I need to hear that at least my mind is not hollow.
I need to hear that somehow I have made a difference.
I need to hear that love I have given; there is a reason.
For past thoughts and wishes, I ask for reverence.
Since my seed has stopped, I have no new season,
I smell crispness of cool autumn air at the end.
I tell of loneliness of country roads to nowhere.
I feel loss of many loves with no future to send.
I have spoken words in ink, all my heart can bare.
However, my mind, I hear, many may say I am selfish.
However, most of you have continuation to relinquish.
My friend within I beg you to stop searching for a wish.
Then possibly more things in life, you may accomplish.


Details | Free verse | |

guaranteed money back...

Stuck.  Glued.  Skewed.
devoted to devotion
dedicated to dancing
on a string

threw away the safety net
to take the chance on
just
once
more

give me a reason
to be here


Details | Free verse | |

Taken Me Down - For You

When all the delicate words are gone,
and all the subtle innuendoes have been written,
and my polite stance is overcome by passion;
patience ended by passion,
all that's left for me to say,
is "I want you".
"I love you"
"I want to kiss you".
"I want to make love with you, now".
I just cannot continue
my lattice work of words.
Unrequitted love has finally taken me down,
end of story.


Details | Rhyme | |

Edmond's Alternate Ending

Edmond’s Alternate Ending I am about to move Though I’ve yet to move on… …now that I’ve moved on Or was it moved back I found all the lack In my alleged desires A mind of loss conspires For redemption, or revenge My vengeance consumed me Began to eat me whole Til I realized I was the one chewing And the graves that I was digging Were nothing more than holes So I stopped biting And recovered the Earth Won’t belittle myself by fighting Or lower my self worth Stooping to do battle with the trolls I’ll just let them dig their own holes


Details | Senryu | |

Missed

Distill emotion
to one cliché “I love you”
call it poetry

Wrap all your feelings
in colorful box, ribbons,
call it greatest gift

Inflated ego
sworn superiority
call it all I need

I hear no trace of
regret in the voice speaking
of indiscretions

I see no sign of
truth in the dark eyes that claim
to love me only

I feel not the touch
of kindness from hands that give
only when they need

Hit-and-run kisses
when all I need is for you
to linger a while

Beware the high ground
only time until the fall
inevitable

Singular captures
only the essence of one
and that one is you

I lost myself there
sometimes I think you love me
for bending to you

So say it’s untrue
though every verb indicates
quite the contrary

I can not believe
manipulated words when
you’re hiding your eyes

Redeem, for this heart
that fell blissful into you
is reaching out still


Details | Bio | |

Explanation Long Overdue

I know it matters little, 
At this time, I am sure,
But I've always felt,
I owed you,
A reason why,
We did not endure...

As I approach,
The final destination,
I've unfinished chores,
I must amend,
And I guess
It's up to each
Of us to tend...

It may sound insane,
In fact, I think it is...
I was feeling too much in love,
Something had to give...
All I'm sure of,
Is this, I do swear...
It was never a question...
Of if I did care...
All I'm sure of, that is,
Whoever followed me,
The luck was his...

I felt I was losing control,
Felt jealous and insecure,
Withdrew into a defensive caccoon,
But there's even more...

I knew I blew my chance
With the most beautiful girl 
I ever had,
One who shared my love,
And to this day I'm sad...

I did what I'm good at,
I ran away and hid,
My life was forever changed,
The dumbest thing I ever did...

I know it sounds insane,
And I'm sure that this is true,
But one thing I can swear,
I never ever,
Stopped loving you.


Details | Couplet | |

Marriage Bed

I am fearful and full of dread,
As I lay here on our marriage bed,

We have had yet another fight, 
And as yet it is our end of night.

He says he wants to show me he only cares,
But it is not love I feel as I lay there.

I say "No I am to sore and in pain."
He moves forward anyways as my tears fall down like rain.

I beg and plead and say "Please no more"
But that is not what for me he has in store.

I give up as my claims fall on deaf ears,
I just lay there in my  pool of tears.

I know he knows what he is doing,
That this is not my choosing.

What once was an expression and an act of our love making,
Has now become something that he thinks is his right in just taking.

The days that I used to crave and hunger for his touch,
Have now turned to an act I must endure as such.

Even though he knows this is wrong and our fight has really has no end,
He believes that in this and this alone our love will transcend.

As he is holding me there on that bed,
Another world is where I go in my head.

He is my husband and I am his wife,
I can't believe this has become our life!

I lay there numb of spirit and mind,
Waiting and waiting for the end of time.

I think of all the ways that I can make him pay,
But in the end as usual I stay!!!

This is not the life I bargained for,
There in this life has to be more.

Why with this one man is it hard for me to walk away?
With any other man I would not stay!

Now the time has come that I can take no more,
Though the time has not come to settle the score.

He begs and pleads for me to stay,
He can't bare for our love to go away!

I still love him and I know that is sick,
But we cannot help who our hearts pick!

I can however leave him alone,
I  won't write nor will I phone.

His days of cruel treatment and torture so vile,
Are long over, there will be no trial!

I have become judge, jury and executioner in this relationship!
You can bet there will no second trips!

Time to move on and to heal,
I cannot and will not give him an appeal.

A new life is what I am forever bound,
A new love is what I found.

He does not get all of me,
For now he is fine to let me be.

Will I ever be able to love again with all my heart?
Who knows, but now is the time to start.


Details | Rhyme | |

How Could You?

You don't understand, I needed you
I needed you to be there for me,
The way you always said you would be
But when I asked for help, you refused
I needed you

You don't understand, I wanted you
I wanted to share our dreams
And if you had only waited
We could have had so many things
I wanted you

You don't understand, I loved you
More than I can explain now
In a way I felt for no other
I reached, but just didn't know how
I loved you

You tell me to let go of the past
But the past is still my present
You've moved on to other things
How can you simply forget it?

How could you
Forget all the laughter, friendship true
And all the love I did give
And throw me away, broken, torn
I am alive, but I barely live

How could you?

You just don't understand...


Details | Sonnet | |

Aphrodite Night

    APHRODITE NIGHT
Remembering that night of our last touch,
when nothing was between us we should know,
in love with loving you, and just how much
I wonder where in time do such nights go?

Forbidden like a box that's sealed up tight,
or like the flame that Zeus refused to share
with mortals such as we, and on this night,
Pandora's box was opened everywhere,

you were, that night, my first and only love
and always shall remain that part of me,
created from the earth and waters of
a night that Aphrodite made to be.

       And I am more than blessed for loving you
          forever and all time, as I shall do.
                   © RON WILSON aka vee bdosa


Details | Free verse | |

Once upon a time in a dream

once upon a time in a dream 
where angels sang
and men with wings and horns fought
battles
and mountains followed you in anger 
I saw your face
and in a maze of solitude fright invades 
the soul 
and voices speak but never heard
I find myself among the stars
and vivid is your face                       
that lingers on 
and in this time of flight suspended in
perpetual animation sensations of 
ecstasy flirts with me
panic captures me I sink in the clutches
of a darkened sky
where this mirage is a reflection of my life 
as this oppression consumes me 
I arrive at a place where time is no more
and tranquility it’s essence 
I touch you and you are real 
and at the acme of this excitement 
I wake 
as the revelation of my manhood
escape the confines of a frightful rapture 
and your face lingers on 
escape the confines of a frightful rapture 
and your face lingers on 



Earl S. Jackson 
Mar 1988,


Copyright © 2006 Earl S. Jackson, all rights reserved.




Details | Bio | |

A Note To the Young Girl On The Other Side Of This World

Hello, Farrah....
It's 7Am here, and cold
Just awoke, with,
Oh, Here We Go Again!
Fever, Pain, Confusion,
And Lots of Other Groovy Things
To Keep My Mind Busy...
Many more people know of you
than a few days ago....
Did you ever hear of Rod Mckuen?
Professional poet/ musician/songwritter-
One of the reasons I love poetry...
Not only will you understand him, you should
enjoy him.....Sorry about your work load....
My French is rusty.....I'm pretty good in geometry though;
received 100% on NYS Regents Exam when young-
an unheard of thing, scores in college of 97-99% for the term's work,
and it seemed easy as pi    (joke- pie, etc....oh, why am I explaining it,
sorry, I forgot who I was talking to.......)  Hope you have a happy day.....write an 
indepth poetic bio??   I'd love it, so would many others....
you are known in literary circles here now, I'd venture to guess....
surprising, the power of words, n'est pas?  Je ne sas pa, rien du tout....pardon 
my spelling and french......it's unused since early 1960's (ancient history)  What 
city are you in?  Ever travel???  A favorite destination???  Any questions about
the enigmatic nature of "Americans?"  We're really well meaning, just sometimes
seems we might misinterpret, or misunderstand things obvious to others (and 
vica versa....) Do you get to see movies???  Need books to read??  I got a library 
of 10,000 books, at least, being handicapped gives me too much time on my 
hands, and my health leaves me precious little of a future to expect.   I have lots 
of funny stories.   I hope you are okay....I never met anyone so brilliant in 57 years 
of living.   Youf friend in poetry, tom."


Details | Epic | |

For Charlie, With Love

To thee I sing O’ muse of verse,
Of our world that the Gods do curse.
For what Gods are these who cruelly play,
Their wicked games, for which humans pay.
Not content with a world of joy & love
They spite us all from Olympus above.
To try us all & break our backs,
As this is drama their world lacks.
For even Achilles was to die,
Yet his name lives on as time goes by.
So let me sing to you of a Great man,
Who’s name too lives on, after his sands have ran.
Charlie his name a heart so pure,
Full of love & passion, & courage sure.
Strode in he did to save poor souls,
One loving lady & her three foals.
‘Tis true his anger at times did boil,
But his effort was not mere toil.
‘Coz though the fires sometimes burned,
He & the foals soon were learned,
That in peace & harmony, joyous times were had,
A man found proud to call Dad.
With he at their side those foals matured,
& They to his nature became inured.
His fair traits & wit passed down,
Championer of rights, humour of renown.
But alas the Gods were not appeased,
Their unending anger had not eased,
So Zeus sent down his violent bolt
& struck Charlie down, what was his fault?
Who knows but they I shall not dwell,
‘Tis but part of the story that I do tell.
For when he passed on & spirit released,
His body slowed & heart was ceased,
He left himself without a sound
& found himself to Olympus bound.
 As he soared high like the dove
To the mount of the Gods high above,
He smiled to us all & sent a kiss
To all the people that he’ll miss.
& miss him back so we will,
That emptiness which we know can’t fill.
But hush your mourning & your sadness,
As he wished it show your gladness
That Charlie came & he all did touch,
Be thankful that we have that much.
So as I close this verse I do sing,
Aphrodite’s love & the fire Hephaestus does bring.
I say to thee be angry not at the Gods,
At Hera’s scheming & Zeus’s vile rods.
For they too bow to the fates,
Who plan our loves & plot our hates.
I thank thee all for your time,
For listening to my Ode to Charlie; my idle rhyme.
How I wish though, the outcome I could reverse,
I sing to thee, O’ muse of verse.


Details | I do not know? | |

Lost Love

As I sit here I wonder why, Why, My Lost Love Why couldn't it have worked Why My Love We each knew our Love for each other But knew what the consequences would have been So we went our separate ways Knowing full well, We'd never Be totally Satisfied Again Until We could be together Why Lost Love, Why Is there some meaning to this Madness I sit and Cry for You, My Love Knowing why I stayed in this situation, Does nothing to ease my pain I Miss You, My Lost Love You have forever been in my thoughts Love If there Is A God In Heaven, Surely, He'll Give Us Another Try My Love I try so hard to be strong, To show no signs of distress Yet, he knows something is wrong, Senses a change in me He's trying so hard, To make right the unjustly wrongs Lost Love Yet my thoughts and fantasies remain Around our times in each others embrace I only wish I could have told you again in person But I'm sure You already know There'll Never Be Another My Love, My Lost Love Is there supposed to be a grieving period I don't know, I only know I hurt, A deep Soul Hurting Like a part of me has died Love, Lost Love


Details | Free verse | |

You Don't Know Me

I smile so no one can see my scars.
You think i'm happy.
But you don't know me.

You don't know the girl
who cries herself to sleep.
Who marred her skin
from all the stress.
Who hates herself 
for all she's done.
Who chokes back screams
when she sees you smile.

You think I handle all this well.
But you don't know 
the torture I put myself through.
I punish myself for all your lies,
but still can't hate you.

You think you can see
but you don't know me.


( 2004 )


Details | Free verse | |

October 13th

Wake up a little earlier; another troubled night
But the remnants of pre-birthday make-up still do their job remarkably
Smile for the camera; these pictures are keepers, so realistically modelled for
Thank yous for unthoughtful offerings; why hurt feelings after all?
A dozen friends all come along; it's not their scene but they want to please me
Can't look over there, have to be the last to go through the door
They're trying so hard, all their love gathering on my windowsill
Some cards handmade with heartfelt affection, gifts so vague and cliched, more 
roses than I could care for
And your dusty eyes still staring through them all from behind the frame
Complete the scene as my headstone

Couldn't have slept at all
Excitedly imagining what you were planning
Warm in your jacket you gave me to sleep in
Wouldn't lift or lower my foolish head
Jitters looking forward to you
Flash could've gone off but we wouldn't notice
Shroud me with your words, promises you could not keep
All the guests combined; a less than you companion
I wonder why we couldn't make it through?
And I'd never had to say goodbye 'til the day that I met you
All that I'd got for we pushed them all out
And I didn't miss them.
Didn't miss them.

Why are you still asking after me?
How do you still reach into my eyes
Before I turn away?
What happened to let us get like this and tell me
When can it end?
How is it I want it to stay?
Though there's a soft spot for you in my heart and you're
Slowly seeping out

Frozen as this face remains
Breaking when I'm forced to recall
I'm 18 and you're not here
But she passed on your message for me
Happy Birthday.
And in those obligated words it all crashes back
I'll keep all our secrets and ignore all the rest
The world we made and left to decay
Keeps me smiling for every wasted day.


Details | Free verse | |

Consume Me

A smile so achingly perfection 
Only hiding evil buried deep inside 
Emptiness and destruction is all you leave behind 
Your love consumes me, burns me from within 
Leaving only darkness, where there once was light. 

Now I’m just a shell, no not even that 
More a memory of the me that disappeared 
As you caressed me with your deadly touch 
Your love it consumed me, burned me from within 
Hidden scars eternal, a reminder of your deceptive evil 

How is it you still consume me when there’s nothing left to take 
Only a hollow void where there once was life 
Yet you’re an obsession I just can’t let go 
Even as I turn to leave, we know it’s not the end 
Only a matter of time, until I’m back again. 


Details | Rhyme | |

How Many Mornings

     will I awaken
               tears?
     struggling, uncomfortably
                          adjusting to fears:

               change - stagnation breeding boredom
               acceptance - realization that it's over
                Self - knowledge that I must face
                truth - she's found another lover....

        discheveled droopy drawers
               howling down on all fours,

         drinking
  under table,
         walking
  though unable,      I

vanish
                                  in the wind.

Symbols of the ways
  that I have wrongly sinned,

Against my inner portrait
  Image with no mirror,

A painted picture of the soul:
  UNDESIRABLY SUPERIOR

         to the one you primp
                      and pose for,
         for vanity's sake:
                                      take yr daily dose
                                      of annihilistic rape!

Yr outer - woven
                 cloven hoofs
                                     are worn and swollen

Better take yr beauty sleep
  before Time has it stolen...

So wash yr guilty 
   wants with lie,
and scrub yr yellowish heel,

rinse yr drydrunk unconscious

and tip-toe at the wheel,

weave in
             out the traffic
and push the pedals hard,

to erase the dividing lines from memory

without a spoken word...


Details | Free verse | |

Blue-Eyed Angel

Through the lies that shatter, the tears that gleam,
Your eyes show the stories, the shadows unclean,
You were mine to have, you were mine to dream,
You were my spotless lies, my everything.

Time wasn’t money, just as love wasn’t trust,
Time was short and love was lust.
Urges were many, to comply was a must,
Goodbye, blue eyed angel, grind this thin wall to dust.

Love was given and unreturned,
Shadows cleared, lies were slurred,
Truth was fought and visions blurred,
Not love, not lust, not the single heart cured.

Not but a memory, not but a name,
Held fast to a girl with her head bowed in shame,
So long gone but a voice can tame,
Goodbye blue-eyed angel, only I was to blame.


Details | Free verse | |

Heartache of a 15 Year Old

I am space. And I am time. I can see wind and I can be kind.
I can breathe you, yet you can't breathe me.
I am the oceans, but you're not the seas.
I am the rain. You are my pain.
I am the Sun. You were my fun.
I was the storm. I am outrage. So angry. So deep. Lock me in a cage.
I am the zoo. Being observed from all views.
My life was a shambles and it was your cue. A cue to enter. A cue to arrive
A cue to witness and to revive.
I am religion and I am here. Not one place. Not neither place but here and there.
Am I the air? Am I the voice?
I wanted you forever but you had your own choice.
To leave, to depart, to exit or restart
You left, you thief and you still have my heart...



Details | Rhyme | |

Somebody To Love

I have no roof to shelter under
When the sky begins to rain
For an umbrella through the thunder
I will always hope in vain.


Details | Free verse | |

The Arms of a Stranger

The odor of warmth and affection,
The feeling of love and protection,
An isolated heaven of love;
I lay in his arms like an angel,
Like a white dove,

At the moment,
I am living an endless time
Of eternal happiness,
Life seems to be everlasting…
Life now, is a colored painting 
Of smiles and joy,

Words slithered between his lips,
Like tiny insects sliding on the petals
Of a bright-colored flower,
I contemplated his beauty as 
I heard his tender voice whisper,
“Thy beauty is like the azure sky.”

Perfection is what I am seeing,
His words kept on repeating
In my head;
In his arms I lived another life…
A nirvana created by his glaring eyes,

“Thy beauty is a mosaic picture on the walls of heaven,”
His words swayed like the dancing waves…
I lay there inertly,
With a river of feelings penetrating 
My soul like an addictive kiss of his,
I smiled…   

--------------------------------
My feelings suddenly shifted,
I felt tiny droplets of water condense
On my cheeks,
Were they tears?

My anguish was immense…
Sadness and grief formed
A body of confusion that mystified 
The fantasizing feelings I had felt,

Here I was,
In your arms;
My ally, the person I shared my life with…
You held me tightly trying to ease
The pain I was feeling,
The pain created by you…

The tears in my eyes created a reflection of
My sufferings,
The sufferings that tend to draw a continuous
Picture of your betraying eyes…
I cried and cried as I felt your arms
Hold me tighter,
I felt no comfort at all…

I closed my eyes trying to place myself
In “his” arms again,
The arms of the stranger 
That allayed my soul like tender music,
Like a harmony created by the soft,
Emerald leaves that danced with the wind…

I smiled again…






 
  


















Details | Lanterne | |

TURMOIL

My
heart breaks
within me-
deep inside I
weep-
peace
is so
elusive
my mind cannot
sleep-
is
love so
unreal,
is it out of
reach-
who
will be
true to me
and their promise
keep-
if
I say
a prayer,
will faith take a
leap-
do
you have
an answer,
to life...fathoms'
deep.


Details | Dramatic Verse (Verse Drama) | |

I believe in love a little less each day

Life can get pretty hard when relationships go astray.
I believe in love a little less each day.
Marriages used to last fifty years, now they last fifty weeks.
Couples keep breaking up even though true love is what everybody seeks.

I've gotten a lot of rejections because I don't have much money.
Everything gets dark when I begin to think it's sunny.
I have pain and anger because life goes this way.
I believe in love a little less each day.


Details | Enclosed Rhyme | |

Life Is Not A Song

It would be good to find a rhythm
But life is not a song.


Days passing with a sigh
Sketching bloodshot eyes for the 
Thousandth time
Both ears welcome in all your
Fears and my arms
Unwrap from myself and absorb the world

This is how I've saved your lives
And for all of the thanks, it can't justify me
Nobody there to pull me back when I try
To break through to the other side
Yet if all the dark was drowned out by the light
Who's to say there'd be anything left of me?

If I cry and collapse, is it me in command?
Or maybe the illness devouring me
Laughing caught in embrace with an intimate face
Could just be the meds overpowering me

Despite all my love and sympathy
I'm the one who my world revolves round
But the guilt even when I convert it to care
Melts in my mouth so I can't make a sound

So perhaps this is me, settled down into rhyme
Given up on my turn for a saviour
Trapped in distress in this mess for all time
Punishment for my selfish behaviour.


Details | I do not know? | |

Back Then

New Years eve gave warmth even in the winds chill.
Young lovers with open arms.
And a wreckless passion so very eager to fulfill.

So blessed to live tonight no need to draw a line.
Kisses tasting sweatier flavored by whisky champagne and wine.

Counting down the seconds down till the next year.
A moment of pure bliss.
I love you seem's to be all your heart needs to hear.

We live.
We learn.
We love we yern.

For that which cannot be held in hand.
You can ask my dear but you can never  command.

Don't question for we have moments in time that shall never change.
that is  perfection beyond the the life that appears so very strange.

Back then can never  be now.
I'd move past her memorie.
If only someone could  tell me how.


Details | I do not know? | |

He does not love me anymore

he does not love me anymore, oh
heart you give me away
the expression of a broken heart
is permenantly fixed
across this face
my eyes
tell stories of the brokenhearted
for thousands of years
I mourn what could of been

he does not love me anymore,
it is such a shame
for my heart gives love away too freely
like a common whore


he does not love me anymore
oh heart, you must decist.
for the deep trench of pain and confusion seems to
fall for an eternity.
Its boundaries unknown to man
I do not wish to explore this pain
for 
I may never return
again

he does not love me anymore
the person I once was is no more.
He does not love me anymore, 
heart, you will make it through.
the shards of it
will
be picked away
gently by time's gentle embrace
for every moment there is it's place

he does not love me anymore.
and that is ok.


Details | Romanticism | |

Gun In the Closet

Gun in the closet,
One in the drawer,
One under the pillow,
Does he need any more?

Scotch on the bar,
Jealousy on the mind
Can take you too far...
Your fate can be signed...

A loud bang,
A jolt,
A puff of smoke,
Gone is Beauty
In one sad stroke...

The Devil helped
Pull the trigger,
Why?
Cause he loves
To make Good People die...

There is no way
I could live with this...
I'll hunt him down
If the law is remiss...

I won't need,
a gun or a knife
For me to take
this bastard's life

He's made us pay
The ultimate price
For you, your life,
To him, just a wife...

To me he killed
Both Love and Hope
And when I find him
Should he grope
For his gun
He will find
My hand has shoved
His nose 
Into his mind...

I'll break it first
for extra pain,
My vengeance will
Never be sated
For my prayer of hope
Is now in vain.




Details | I do not know? | |

hand in hand

For you and I to overcome all this,
A neverending uncontolable miserable abiss.
Endless,darkened,no light yet to be seen
We will be victorious in our endeavours,
and get all we dream.

Deserve, we do and suffer as well
Not to be outwitted,
our friendship won't fail
Forever we will be priceless
as our friendship is endless

And in short time all the anguish
will never be the same
Together through life we will remain


Details | Free verse | |

The Window

I’ve been staring out the window all night long
But I don’t know what it is I expect to see
Maybe I will see myself walking, happy,
Down the street, where I can cross to the other side
But the street is empty
And there’s nothing but the falling leaves
So I look back inside now
Where I try to forget
That the world outside is not so cold
And the emptiness inside me
Is the only feeling that I know
And I cry…

I’ve been living with the pain of a love gone wrong
When inside I know that love seems so damned right
So tell me that you just don’t love me, it’s better
Than saying that you love me
But we can’t put it back together
The shards that are so broken
You should know, I’d give anything
To have the chance to make you see
That I’m not the one who hurt you
Look at me, don’t you see who I am?
But the silence here is deafening
I know I must forget you
But don’t know why…

So I sit here by my window looking out
Watching life just pass me by while I sit alone
I look for something to move me, distraction
But all I see are falling leaves 
As they land and scatter
I know the breeze that blows
Because I feel it in my soul
And it’s cold and so unyielding
Blowing across the street 
So I cannot cross to the other side
Still, I keep looking
And I cry…


Details | I do not know? | |

Loverly Liar

Baby Girl
Is what they call me
I am sweet
I am a child at heart
My nickname means nothing
On the inside
I am in the dark
Yes I am this girl
But baby girl means
Sweet
Innocent
I am a
Lovely liar
I am not
BABYGIRL


Details | Romanticism | |

Discreet

One day I must be discreet
If perchance we should meet
I'd be humbled at your feet
And oh how very sweet...
I don't know if or when
All I know is a strong yen
To touch your face once more
Before I die,
Or die in my effort to try.


Details | Dramatic monologue | |

Ashes

Haunting memories break
the surface, struggling for
air to breathe and space to
occupy. Quiet dread fills
my heart, enslaved by
liquid lungs.

Panic at these bones that
I had buried. Stay down
in the peaceful dirt. But
some things will never lie still.
Truth breaks free, coloring
the gray.

I guess it's no more
than I deserve. The girl that
was once stuffed in closets, crammed
under beds. As this ancient relic
comes forth to stake a claim
on my life.

I remember being drunk
on sunshine, intoxicated by
lilacs, with the underlying hint
of rotten apples. So, go to sleep,
little angel. Fly away into the sun.
Leave me in peace with what I have done.

Turn away, little memory.
Remember however you choose but
I am far too good now to wallow
in deceit, filth and tar. I have
now a comfortable bed to lie in
and solitude.

I own all of my tragedies,
my flaws, my mistakes. I've
wrapped them all in bows and
packed them away with dust
for food. I am not that person
you knew.

You were aware that I
was no innocent. A gentle
waif that waited patiently
for you to be known. I
adore you for your understanding
and pretending.


Details | Narrative | |

My Design

You’re touching me, but I’m unaffected 
You worry of what I’ve become 
Disconnected, I welcome in the cold 
It feels so good to just go numb 

All I feel is static 
Know that my response 
It’s automatic 

I travel down this lonely road 
The one that I designed 
Another sacred place of mine 
The one that I call home 

It’s the place where peace finds me 
Away from the noise, the shuffle and all the droning 
The only place I don’t feel alone 
Here in the company of my own 

The darkness that I seek 
Not of evil, but that of tranquility 
Where I let my problems drift away 
Gets me through to the next day 

Even as you lie here with me 
Why can’t you understand 
It’s the silence I find comforting 

Not the chaste brush of a hand 
Or the passion you choose to unleash 
Something deeper is my soul’s demand 
That of the physical is just an illusion 

All I feel is static 
Know that my response 
It’s automatic 

Somewhere between happiness and sadness 
Sitting out in the pouring rain 
Say what you have to say 
Can’t accept who I am 
This is where we go our separate ways 



Details | Rhyme | |

I Blame Cupid

Cupids arrows
Must be dipped in poison,
Because I thought hearts were meant to beat,
Not to be broken

In the beginning i was in love
And thought it was all meant to be, 
Just me and him, in harmony.

I was going to walk away, 
But I decided to give him one last try
Then he hit me, with his solomn goodbye.

Cupid, you aren't always right.
The choices you make
Can backfire and turn love into hate.

Its not anything new to me, 
My life has always been filled
With suffering and pain.
But this time its not my fault, 
Cupid's the one to blame.


Details | Rhyme | |

Telling A Story

Girl you treat me bad and dont give it a second thought.
Run around on me with every other man.
look so fine with new clothes for you I bought.

You just say there friends larry Frank  Corey.
You say  it's all in my head.
But I know your telling me a story.

He's got money  he's gotta fancy car.
But when thoose looks fade darlin.
Thoose boy's wont even remember who you are.

I guess im a fool some call me your clown.
Cause every other night I'm sharing you with every man in this 
town.

I crumble at the tales of others backseat glory.
You just  say it's lies .
But your just telling a story.

Down at the bar where I drown my pain
Others laugh behind my back.
Say that old boy has gone insane.

The fool to weak to see the forrest for the trees.
A broken heart tired from always wondering .
A voice  gone hoarse from always begging please.

You played to long with a man named Rick.
But forgot about his wife lorrie.
She shot ya both.
And put the final chapter to your  tellin of a jaded story.


Details | Rhyme | |

At Night Alone

  So here I sit, at night, alone
  Bored and just too many cigarettes to burn
  So I smoke and I wait, seemingly for a call
  And really just ache, cause it's not coming at all
  You're too many miles away from home
  I feel the distance at night, alone
  I hate you for the restless nights
  And I hate me because I know it's not right
  To sit in front of the computer screen
  Searching for the words I just want to scream
  Not even knowing the pain that I feel
  How to describe what feels so unreal
  I miss, just miss, everything that is you
  Laughing for hours at things that you do
  And how could it be that this is the end
  What was to be a lifetime of new things to begin
  But here I sit, at night alone
  And the numbness inside is all that I know


Details | Rhyme | |

Forbidden

Untouchable, yet close enough to touch.
It's wrong, I know but I want you so much.
You are the compliment to who I am supposed to be.
You are the one who can set my tortured soul free.
To help me to thrive and to inspire me.
It brings tears to my eyes to think of the impossibility.
There are too many obstacles in our way, 
Too many people to hurt, too big a price to pay.
So with a friendship I must be satisfied,
And bury these feelings deep down inside.
It's just that from you it will be too hard to hide,
When I spend so much of the day at your side.
I think that I am going out of my mind.


Details | Free verse | |

you, man

there are veins on the sides of your face
they reach for your eyes
aimed to kill

there are veins on your hands
all together they jump

and again they together jump

if the sun dont burn or if it do, build
first:  rip apart that old thing
make them all the parts remember the beginning of their time

make them grow together to forget
make them grow
you,
man covered in veins

you, man with the steady hands
that wiped up my sticky spilled mess 
(vodka, the unfair things you wont let me say, the songs i make from them, and throw up)
wiped them up good

and other parts of the day,
you don't fall

i wonder if you ever give in just sometimes
just a small glimmer of a bit
to pretend that you are covered, veins and all
in tiny green leaves

i am forever indulging in the vision


Details | I do not know? | |

Love

Love can be a beautiful thing
It can ensnare your senses
Confuse you as to which way is up
It can make you do stupid things,
Dangerous things
If you get far enough into it can control you
Make you do things you wouldn’t normally do
Love is the best feeling in the world until…
It all comes crashing down
Then it’s a nightmare
One you just can’t seem to wake up from
You’re plagued by thoughts of what if…
It can be heartbreaking
To know you’re not the one they want
You beat yourself up
You feel like you’ve been slapped in the face
You wonder what you did wrong
You know you still want them
And you know that that’s wrong
But it hurts knowing they don’t want you
They tear your heart out and devour it for dinner
But that’s after they’ve step on it a few times
With their spiked riddled boots
And left it there bleeding
For all to see
A tortured mass of flesh and blood
You feel so out in the open
So small, so fragile and useless
Like the next breeze could blow you away
Yes, love is definitely a beautiful thing…
Until it goes wrong.


Details | I do not know? | |

What You Did

Ice in my eyes
Ice in my veins
Ice in my heart 
Ice in my gaze.
I sat there in my dreary haze
WAtching little "replays"
Of what you did in those days.
You shut me out.
Locked me in.
To try to save me from the din.
But what you didn't realize,
Pain in my eyes
The tears on my face
That you were the one
putting me in that place.
you left me there for days,
seeming as I did something wrong.
I was broken, beaten and weak.
But you broke me,
I picked up the pieces and put me back together...
 Stronger than ever.


Details | Free verse | |

Because . . . I Can

Either side of the bed is mine
at my whim
and
Fancy

Coffee cups left in the sink
until there are
no
more
Clean

vacuum in the middle of the
floor
for a Week

remote - Mine
precisely.where.I.left.it.

Stink
of steamed broccoli and cauliflower
Welcome.

planting gardenias by the moon
music LOUD and interminable

unstructured.
Untethered.

Because.
I finally.
Can.


Details | Rhyme | |

jules

Troubled heart and best friend.
Your love is ridding a rail.
Your hair within the wind.

Take the fragments from every one night stand.
The bottle is always half empty.
When passedfrom a guilty hand.

Am I your confessor Your lover   your clown
or friend.
In empty arms you take refuge.
with many smiling fools none of which
you can depend.

Sorry I played the game  withuot even
reading the rules.
Sorry I bleed from the heart.
Only to speak from the pen jules.

Run and hide try to erase your 
thoughts from all.
In a labyrinth we do exist.
From that pool of nothing we crawl.

Should I fade like some villian down some dark 
street.
Forgetting the encounter.
Only to recall a moment in another tragedy
we did meet.

Even the most firey passion cools.
cast away my wishes 
and engave my words.
Forever my Jules.


Details | Couplet | |

Disappointment

Disappointment was never as lovely as she
Hope caught in my heart fighting delicately
She's always the dream that never fades upon waking
The cause and the comfort for all of my shaking

I like to glance over then turn carelessly
Just to see if it makes her come over to me
Her smile is infectious and wipes away fear
If it fades then I show her that I'm always near

Sometimes we are split by self-built barricades
So I break through our silence of awkward blockades
And no matter how often old times we recall
We'll forever laugh and the false walls will fall

They all think I'm crazy my truth to repress
Do anything for her and never confess
Yet silently love I continue to show her
It's enough just to feel that I'm getting to know her

But despite my devotion and adoration
There still remains space for one complication
The spark in my eyes grows colder and dim
When I am reminded she's happy with him

Surely love wants the best for the person it's for?
Not selfishly trying their joy to ignore
But however hard jealousy my heart will dent
If my darling is happy, then I am content.


Details | Bio | |

Sometimes

Sometimes when I see
A happy family
It quickly gets to me
The sadness that must be
In this lonely life of just me

For whatever sins I may have done,
I never meant to hurt anyone
And whatever luster I had in life,
Burned away with a cheating wife.

I realize part was my fault
I did not provide something I ought,
But the pain was slow to fade,
In the misery that she made

Now hope has come again to me
In a beauty all can see
Shining from the inside out
Makes me want to shout

And, I know that I am blessed.
And in happiness I am dressed.


Details | Free verse | |

Take Me Away

Take me away from here,
From the noise and the pain.
Somewhere nowhere near;
Away from the stress and the strain.

Take me away from here,
From the shouts and the tears.
Somewhere nowhere near;
I've been hiding for years.

Take me away from here,
From the lonely days and nights.
Somewhere nowhere near;
Let's turn off the lights.

Take me away from here,
From these acts that can't be forgiven.
Somewhere nowhere near;
Some place much like Heaven.


Details | Rhyme | |

Fake Love

 He says he loves me only when he's had too much to drink
 But he kisses in such a way that my mind forgets to think
 I forget all the pretty faces he's ever know before
 Even the one yesterday he hid behind closed doors
 He doesn't have to know I'm in on his little game
 Cause when I'm in his arms, I know nothing about shame
 He says that it hurts if my body is not near
 But then could it be so easy for him to not give his 
 love to share
 Maybe I can have more, but I only want his lips on my skin
 If I could have it all, I'd only ask for him


Details | Free verse | |

Pears and Lilies

Across the cold concrete steps
Are strewn pears and lilies

A very long time ago
A grave tragedy occurred here

No one saw anything
No one said a word

Dark spirits now protect the site
Somber, powerful memories still remain

At the corner of forever
Out on the edge of time

Where something means everything
But means nothing at all

Stands a figure transfixed, keenly aware
that beyond the void and

Across the cold concrete steps
Are strewn pears and lilies


Details | I do not know? | |

Scream and Shout

I wish this battle would end today
I’m so tired and really must say
That if you continue
To stress me out
I’m afraid there’s more I can do
Than simply just shout
You say I drive you crazy
And you don’t know why
That I must scream, yell and cry
Well just once
You should hear me out
Then maybe I wouldn’t
Feel the need to shout out
But you must understand
There is a reason to you whys
Why you make ME crazy
And why I easily cry
And I’m not saying
I’m right and you’re wrong
I’m simply saying
It’s getting hard to go on
With this life I made with you
Our home, our marriage
And our children too
I love you all without doubt
But I can’t stand
How you make me shout
And I do not like the way you are
When you say that’s it 
And that it is YOU who are tired
For I have put in
One hundred and ten percent
And you may say you love me
But I can’t see that yet
I thought I did when we first met
But that one I haven’t
Figured out just yet
But I know this without a doubt
That the that you make me shout
Just isn’t right
And is driving me insane
As well as it is you
I can see your views
But the problem here
Is easy to see
It is a little bit you
And a little bit me
And together with family
Disaster makes three
That is my view
At this present time
Concluded from the vibes
That I get from you
And if you don’t get
What I’ve been trying to say
Then I hope and I pray
You figure it out one day
For I’m tired of explaining
Myself to you
When all that you do
Is form your own views
I’m sick of the way
I scream and I shout
When you twist things around
And put words in my mouth!!

8/14/2005 3:47 AM


Details | Quatrain | |

Tangled up

I'm breaking inside like shattered glass
The shards cut sharp and deep
Noone sees within these walls
Or know the secrets that I keep

I become so lost and helpless
Like a little child crying
My hands are weak and fragile
And my will to fight is dying

I donot understand myself
Or this monster that I see
Reflecting from this mirror
Broken eyes look back at me

Once so proud of who I was
Now ashamed to know at all
I'm fighting off the agony
And I've never felt this small

Help me, someone, can you hear?
I'm bleeding where I cannot find
Tell me that it's all a dream
That I'm not losing half my mind


The fire of pain that burns me
Leaves scars inside my heart
It rips in two, my belly
And pulls my soul apart

I'm stripped of all my dignity
As I lay there in my tears
A pool of hurt becomes a river
And I realize my fears

You changed, and life has changed
Will I ever feel I'm free?
I looked into your eyes that loved
And I no longer could see me


Details | Free verse | |

Plenty of Tomorrows (No More Sorrows)

       Tomorrow is another day, a fresh start.
You manipulated your way and stole my heart!
       I try to focus on self, but I'm seriously failing.
You took my emotional wealth, and now my mind is sailing.
       Drifting along, needing an answer as to "why?"
You would rewrite my song, look me in the eye and lie!

       Tomorrow is another day, a new beginning.
I kneel and pray for all this sinning.
       You dragged me down to the lowest point in my life.
Take off that crown you're no longer my wife.
       I will carry on and refuse to look back.
I'd rather be alone, I'm serious as a heart attack!
       Hearts don't break they just tend to bend.
I took all I could take now I'm gone with the wind!!!!

03/10


Details | Free verse | |

Reflections of her Puzzle

Perched on a smooth river rock
    studying her reflection in the flow
A timeline of changing faces
   slowly drifts by...
Carefree happy child
   running, playing among trees.
Rebellious miserable teen
   banging her head against authority.
Disillusioned, deeply depressed
   escaping with her spirit broken.
New mother ecstatic in California
   memorizing his growing up slide show.
Lonely, desolate woman with wrong partners
   until near death does she part.
Empty-nesters' angst ridden face
   hidden, lost in darkness.
Unstoppable learner/teacher
   finding her pieces in lifes' school.
Evolving computer addict, isolator
   searching on-line for love.
Mostly content, peaceful now
   her heart found God and "true blue."
Freedom lover flying, watching from above
   Her lifes' puzzle face more balanced
   yet incomplete.


Details | I do not know? | |

Was It Worth It?

What happens now?
Was everything worth it?
The angry words that have been said
That comes from you being mislead
Was it worth all the sacrifices, like giving up your dreams?
And all you were trying to do was make the other succeed
Was it worth all the bumps and bruises that you would hide or lie about?
And the whole time you are filling with doubt
Was it worth your children seeing you crying
Tell them everything is fine, but all you're doing is lying
All these things seem to happen overnight,
Never seeming to have the ending light.
There are no easy answers and no hope, you feel cursed
You hope he sees the damage and  he goes back to putting your feelings first
You hope you can have the trust and honest back
along with the laughter and tenderness he is starting to lack
You hope the best friend you had in one another would return
And there are no traps or hidden agendas new to learn
You hope to talk about the dreams you both wanted at one time
Now you hate to even think about tommorow
Hope was the one thing that was never borrowed
But hope is the thing that has left and betrayed you
You feel broken, beat down, nothing but black and blue
All this and you wonder why, Was it worth it?


Details | Bio | |

Sorry, Seems Eternity Ended Last Week

I was but a boy
You seemed almost a toy,
So young, and in love,
We fit just like a glove

You said, "All I can offer you,
Is a love that time can not destroy"
Oh boy!, Oh boy!!
It filled me full of joy.

Nineteen was I
Sixteen you were,
Living in our house,
My Mom, you loved her...

My father, you helped him
 build a stoop,
These are moments, 
We can never recoup...

But eternity was short lived,
You went to work,
Left me for another man,
I felt like the biggest jerk

No, it's not all your fault,
I realize that,
I did not provide something,
In grief I sat,
Your treacherous friend,
Her eyes on me,
Stirred the pot,
For whatever reason,
For me she was hot

But I would not cross that line,
Her boyfriend,
Was a friend of mine

Well it's all water under the bridge
Over troubled waters,
A song I cherish,
Our eternal love,
Was destined to perish.


Details | Rhyme | |

Handle This

A girl would flee and hide from fear
As I from you did disappear.
No explanation but I think you know
And so resolved to let me go,

The faded thrill of flaunted kisses
Sparking through my reminisces
In twelve months time has let hope fall
Will I even see you at all?

And on my return so little was new,
These thoughts are overrun with you
All was soon as it had rested,
With you my core is still infested.
This sometime draining dark unpleasance
Now occupies me with its presence,
So is the norm for hearts in hell
To suffer knowing all will be well.

Matured, these conflicts must be faced;
No more of the best days can I waste,
Your smiling eyes I must enjoy
Before they will my mind destroy,
Grown arms wrapped tightly round your neck
Before they will my friendships wreck,
We're changing but not blooming yet
Your foolish plans still make me fret,

And so to I once more you flee
'Til all my mind is gone from me
And all the patience as you outpour
For a lifetime would a woman endure.


Details | Rhyme | |

The Return

Promises made on the day he did depart.
After a  long wait in hell.
When his feet touched  familar soil they'd  make a new start.

But time is a empty partner indeed.
Nights turned to endless hours.
And in a moment of weekness  she did concede.

With time and regret so we do learn.
He saw no one waitting.
On the day of his return.

So many happy smilling faces none he did know.
Just strangers in another life.
He just a extra in the background of this  traggic show.

He knew the adress but couldnt reconize  the place.
many storms had passed.
But haunted was the look apon her face.

Tears  and regret over what she had and for
what she did yern.
Victems of time  tears but not of joy.
Shed apon  this sudden return.

Deep within the eyes  thoose old feelings 
almost did shine through.
A confession in pain.When she waved farewell
it was already threw.

A leason of  emptyness two former 
lovers did learn.
Passion like any flame dies.
Leaving only smoke and darkness
to greet you apon your return.


Details | Cowboy | |

Modern Cowboy

I love that cowboy, lean and tall...
I see him lumber to the stall,
To cool his horse from ridin hard,
He tips his hat...says, "Howdy pard!"

I love that cowboy in his jeans,
With well-worn chaps and leather's sheen.
Those boots and spurs that fit so well...
The way he chats and sits a spell. 

I love that cowboy's manly ways...
Perhaps a rumble in the hay?
He's talkin rough around the guys,
But makes this lady swoon and sigh!

I love that cowboy on a ride,
I see him ropin...tannin hides...
But what's this ringing that I hear?
His trusty cell phone...loud and clear!





 
 


Details | I do not know? | |

Hello/Goodbye

When You See Me I Say Hello
When I Leave You Say Goodbye.
How Then Did I Not Know My Hello
Would Be My Last Goodbye.
When The Phone Rings I Hope To
Hear Your Voice And Its Soft Tone.
But When It Rings I Hear Someone
And Its Not You How Could This Be.
Your Sweet Hello's Come To Me Like
You Never Left My Tears Start To Flow
When I Hang Up The Phone.
Hello/Goodbye I Often Cry For Your
No Longer Here What To Do Where 
To Turn.
My Tears Start Falling And My Heart
Burns Because Your No Longer
Here To Guide Me.
Hello/Goodbye I Just Don't Want To 
Cry But I'm Hurting Still My Life Will
Never Be The Same.
How To Deal? How To Cope?
I Just Think Of You And The Tears
Just Start To Flow.
Hello/Goodbye God Why Oh Why 
Did She Have To Die.    





Details | Lyric | |

Let Me Go

You make me feel
So beautiful
When you're mine
You make me feel
So wonderful
When you're not lying
But I cant 
Stand to see your arm around her waist
And I cant
Stand to hear you calling out her name

Im begining to see
That you only want them
When you no longer have to chase me
And you only want me
When I belong to someone else

You tend to call me
When I dont want
Anything to do with you
You tend to call me
Late at night
When Im with someone new
But I cant
Stand the nights when you dont call me at all
And I cant 
Stand to hear that you were at her house all night long

Im begining to see
That you only want them 
When you no longer have to chase me
And you only want me 
When I belong to someone else

Why do you
Do this to me
Why cant you see
What this is doing to me
After I find out your lie
I lie in my bed and cry
And I wake up in the new morning
Only to geel the new break in my heart forming

Im begining to see 
That you only want them
When you no longer have to chase me
And you only want me
When I belong to someone else

Let me go
or hold on to me
Let me go
or just dont leave
Let me go


Details | Free verse | |

The Gingerbread Man

We lay side by side in the summer grass,
I reached for the gingerbread man kit
And lifted out a slightly crumbled biscuit,

Taking the tube, I iced a shaky smile onto its face,
Added big, hopeful chocolate drop eyes
And wrote 'I love you' down its front,

Then I handed it to her and said,
"This is me, take care of her,"
And she grinned and bit off its head.


Details | Rhyme | |

The Night

 The night is still very clear, and so hard 
 to erase from my mind
 Though it must've been a million years, another 
 place and time
 The kiss was filled with a hunger no one else
 has shown
 It was the most extreme love that I've ever
 known
 The night instilled a fire that will not seem
 to die
 And no one can replace all I felt inside
 The good-bye was the hardest one I've had  to  
 meet
 And I still feel the pain on the wound that was
 cut too deep


Details | Lyric | |

You Broke Me

You broke it
You broke it
You tore it right apart
You made me
Finally believe
That we'd never be apart

I cant stand
How you can just
Look at me th way you do
I cant stand
How you can just
Make me feel the way you do
Then turn away
Let me feel that I am to blame

You broke it
You broke it
You tore it right apart
You made me
Finally believe
That we'd never be apart

I cant stand 
How weak I feel
When you waltz right in
I cant stand 
How weak I feel
When you play me like a field
Then you say "Goodbye"
No matter how many times, I still wonder "Why"

You broke it 
You broke it
You tore it right apart
You made me 
Finally believe
That we'd never be apart

One of these days 
I'll wisen up
I wont forget about you
You wont forget about me
But I'll never forget
The pain that Loving you
Is causing me

You broke me
You broke me
You tore me right apart
You made me 
Finally believe 
That you'd never break my heart


Details | Couplet | |

Acid Reign

  Acid tears of salt and grief
all bottled up to send
across the ocean to a thief
who ran away again.
  archaic eyes in charcoal gray
painted on the wall
a mural of the way you stray
especially in the fall
In the fall
of love and hope 
you strangle me again
like the dead tree with a rope
fresh knotted by a friend.


Details | I do not know? | |

But I Still Love Him

I hear your screaming, 
So I begin to shake
And hyperventilate.
I ask myself why I made such a mistake.
You get closer and closer,
With a baseball bat at hand. 
‘Baby, I’m sorry for what I did, 
But why you hurt me like this, I don’t understand.’
No sincerity did I get from my plea,
Instead you physically,
And verbally,
Abused me.
A smack in the face begins the ceremony
It hurt, I couldn’t help groaning.
Because sound escaped my lips,
Another encounter with the bat, on my hips.
The monster flees, leaving this poor girl in pain
Not realizing that there’s something wrong in what he did, 
And that he’s mentally insane.
I lie on the ground 
With broken bones,
And bruises covering every inch of my skin
And yet I don’t know why,
But I still love him. 


Details | Quatrain | |

For You...My Friend

I get the silent phone calls.
I know she's on the line.
Why don't you be a man for once
and choose her home or mine?

You say I must be crazy
because I do accuse...
You must have forgotten
how much I have to lose.

I've given you the better part
of my unhappy life.
Why can't you just be satisfied
with me being your wife?

Have I made you be unfaithful?
Do I not fulfill your needs?
Or is it just your selfishness
that makes you do such dirty deeds?

I'll get the strength to leave you,
and believe me...when I do,
You'll Pay for all the pain you've caused
when she does the same to you!


Details | Ballad | |

The Wanderer Part two

I grabbed her hand
Hope and love sweling
Mixing into an enticing brew
Whose flavor
brought forth
all the wild creatures
from the desert araound me.
They applauded m success
and ran back for their's

But I had the luck
of the blessed
I held her hand tight
Told her who I was
She nodded
Her light engulfed me

Suddenly my fright swelled inside
What if she left too?
The dark roadis too hard
for me now.

She grabbed my hand
Told me she loved me
In twelve seconds
she smelt my fear
tasted my love
Tired of my existence
and departed

I was rooted to the spot
Her flesh's warmth
had yet to leave my palm
when she passed into the sunset

Shock numbed my feet
Shock numbed my tongue

It was dark
Darker than it had been
Too dark to breath
Too dark to walk

I fell by the roadside
To the vultures
Even crawling was too hard
I poked out my eyes
So no more beauty could touch my soul
I cut off my feet
So I could not walk
It took all of two seconds
for the vultures to come
My end is here
But death is preferable to pain
I welcome the big grey birds."


Details | I do not know? | |

When I close my eyes


When I close my eyes 
I see us together 
Wrapped in a warm loving embrace
You are kissing me
You are caressing me
Our hearts beating as one
Time seems to be standing still
You are loving me again
No other fills your heart
You whisper in my ear
“Baby I am sorry for everything
You are the only one that I want and love”
My heart skips a beat 
As tears roll down my face
God has sent you back to me
I open my eyes
And you are gone and no longer there
No longer mine
For you love and are with another
Tears run down my face 
As reality sets in again
My heart and mind shredded and shattered once again
Pain and heartbreak consumes me
I reach out for the only thing that remains of you
Your pillion, you scent lingers there
I hold it tight to my chest
It is all that I have left of you along with the memories
I wish the vision I see when I close my eyes was real
I pray to God for him to send you back to me
To make you mine for the rest of time






Details | I do not know? | |

Frail

My frail words
Fall apart
When uttered from my
Decayed lips.
Sounds and sentences
Escape with each melancholy
Breath.
Synthetic silence.
Panoramic audio.
Theories of chaos
Float upon clouds of catastrophe.
My reflection trapped in the mirror.
Eternity encapsulated.
Visions of beauty become clearer.


Details | Bio | |

My Problem

Yeah, I know,
It's "My Problem"...
No sweat to you...
Even though I might beg,
For help or advise what to do...

I'm cut off from the internet...
My last human link...
With my good poet friends,
Guess I'll just mix a drink...

Kind'a sad,
I gotta' admit....
When those I've helped,
Suddenly seem fit...
To ignore my calls...
Who gives a s_it...

You'd tell me to just join Yahoo,
But I don't know how,
With no internet connection...
I'm "having a cow!!!"
I sure tried reaching you,
You didn't pick up,
Suddenly I have no phone service..
Now what do I do??
And all the meds I need...
Suddenly my card is not honored...
I can only guess New York State...
Has decided my life to terminate...
Sure makes for a great day...
But I've got more to say...

I gave you a good lump of money,
Not too far in the past...
Said use what you need...
I think it should last...
Never thought I'd have this problem...
Another warning I failed to heed...

I still believe, I still trust you,
Maybe aliens have invaded,
And you know not what to do...
But for heaven's sake...
Don't know how much more
Bad news I can take...
Seems a cesspool of misfortune...
Is swimming around in my air...
How much, my God,
Am I supposed to bear?

I was once a man...
Of substantial means...
But find them now...
The Twilight Zone, it sure seems

And with my health failing...
Falling apart in big bits...
I feel hard pressed...
To hold on to my wits...
Even my remote did desert me,
I cried as I search...
He left me one channel
He left me in a lurch...
 
And when it seems...
No one gives a sh_tz,
I start to find,
Some scary angry head fits...

My pen has worked long...
And hard, be assured...
Fought off mental demons...
Hence, I have endured...

But betrayal, or indifference,
Bites one so hard...
There's no way in the world...
You won't wind up soul-scarred...

All I can say,
Some should be...
feathered and tarred..
For those they have marred...
Hope this never happens to you...
But if that should come to pass..
Just call me, I'll be there
My love will always last...

But, now, if you get a chance,
Please tell me what to do...
You know how to survive...
You know I idolize you..."



t


Details | I do not know? | |

Us Avoiding We

The smiles are replaced by teardrops that you and I both cry,

our love is growing colder as we prepare to say good-bye.

It’s really not the love loss that is pushing us away,

it’s the boredom and frustration growing stronger everyday.

Both of us have found a way to go off and just be free,

Why is it that you can’t see it’s Us Avoiding We?

The love’s no longer magic, the gold has turned to ash,

we no longer share the same dreams, decisions made are rash.

I really think I love you, yet lately I don’t know,

our relationship is crumbling and we choose to stand alone.

We used to laugh together, now we cry apart,

our lives were filled with sunshine and the beating of two hearts.

Yet now we live together and how distant we’ve become,

we no longer see the glory in the majestic setting sun..

I’d love to see the fun return, the smiles and the laughs,

the times when we were never an aching heart in half.

The pain we feel seems stronger than the love we used to share,

the doubts and all the worries seem more than we can bear.

Time is passing quickly and someday you too will see,

we shared the best before the days of Us Avoiding We...



Details | I do not know? | |

The place you put me in

As I sit here in the middle of our bed
I stair at my med bottles
Tears streaming down my face
My heart laying at my feet
Shattered and broken into a zillion pieces
My thoughts so confusing
My emotions ragging out of control 
And so overwhelming
My vision so unclear
Hurt and pain engulf my body
This hell I am in here and now 
Is all because of you
Everything you taught me now destroyed 
Trust broken
Heart shattered 
World destroyed
This hell is becoming almost to much for me to bare
I am trying to be fair to everyone
I am trying to be strong
But without you I don’t know if I can survive 
You say I did nothing wrong 
How can the be
When your love for me is gone
I don’t know what to do or say
For you to change your heart and mind and stay
No matter what I do or say 
I am the one who hurts and looses
This pain keeps hurting more and more each day
My love for you will always remain
There are only two ways I see to end this awful hurt and pain
One for you to come back to me and love me again
Two to end this hurt, pain and suffering for good
To take all my meds and walk away to die on my own
The first unfair to you
The last unfair to our children
I pray that the good Lord watches over me
And shows me another path
For I am afraid that I will end this pain for me 
Only to cause a lifetime of hurt and pain for our children


Details | Rhyme | |

Never Taken Away

They've taken my knives,
they've taken my pills,
so I look at you
and my pain refills;
they can take the razors
they can take the beer
but as long as you live
I'll have monster and pain adhere.
Let them take what they want
but they can't keep me alive
because, while you hold her
all the damage I do to myself, thrives.
They can take away the glass,
the mirrors from the walls,
but while you are in my memory
I will walk haunted halls.
Let them take what they will,
for no one here can see,
as long as he lives
I'll have something to hurt me.


Details | Free verse | |

Un

Don’t you dare
   think
of
   leaving me with
the mess of you
to
unknow the heart of
you
to
unlearn the soul of
you
to
untie the strings of
us
to
attempt to defy
the laws of
nature


Details | I do not know? | |

Dark Boredom

Speaking once for some levity
Speak it twice for revenge
Speaking three times so you look at me
You’ll hear me never again

I paint you a picture
Of everything you are
If you’re honest you will love me
Too bad I’m just another scar

Speaking of how to retrieve me
I sing my little songs
But when boredom depletes me
I’ll ask you what is wrong

If I speak of how to screw you
You’re just another toy
If I tell you that I love you
You’re just another desperate ploy

Riddles become my serenity
Psychopathic malcontent
If I can’t have you it will please me
The search for death is heaven sent


Details | Lyric | |

You Don't Notice

You don't notice how I feel
You just think everything is real
But my pain can't heal 
When you are just standing still

I am always hurt but you don't know
It is not like i want to show
If i told you, you will blow
So my emotions, you will never know

You don't notice how I cried
How i am so broken deep inside
You notice how I lied
But you don't notice why

You blamed me for everthing I do
You suffocated me for all I'd done for you
If this is what you are going to put me through
Then, I will just separate from you

There is a reason why I don't talk everyday
You are the one who made me this way
So today, i shall pray
That hoping your love won't be delay

You are not concerned of me
You just think you are always right
But when I know you are wrong
All you did was start a fight

You don't notice how i feel
You don't notice how I cried
You are immatured of what is real
And you just left me broken inside.


Details | Free verse | |

Share My Wine

Share my wine
One last time
Lay next to me
Let me feel your sweet breath
On my neck once more,
I have never forgotten you,
And everything you swore
Locked in crystal eternity
Inside my love
You lay next to me
each night I live
In memories you yet give


Details | Rhyme | |

Grim Fairytale

Of stunted dreams
and lying schemes
on sand the castle stood
       	~~~
through windows slit in deep stone walls
no light be found within
the moldy, moody corridors
resound with deafening din

she dreams of love forsaken
and feeds them to the birds
who keep her from insanity
silent whispers without words

she spends her time with puzzles
in the dungeon dank and dark
digging for missing pieces
of her torn and scattered heart

one day the gates will open
the lock will rust and fall
she’ll step into the sun
and not look back at all


Details | Rhyme | |

Disarray

Come slip
beneath
   my skin
where time has
   lost
   its mind
where
angles slew askew
   toward chaos
close behind
where
   up
   sees
   hope
that
   down
betrays
   left
standing
unaware
that
   right
goes toward
the
   light
and
   dark
collects despair


Details | Free verse | |

Madison Avenue

She adores my laugh
and fears my history
But finds herself in the pieces
of a mirror that hangs above an empty bed
Empty of heart
Empty of desire
Empty of that void that hides what a soulmate can only see
without vision
without touch
without light
without her
Explain the taste that lingers upon my ears
and drips me wet upon a dry heart
with hope
with passion
with trust
with adoration
She adores my laugh
She adores my words
She adores my pain
She adores me
a me that needs her
a me that does love her
a me that is learning to like me
because of her
because of her heart
because of her desire
because of her laugh
I slip into a pallet of paint 
that contains her
that envies no rainbow
that never washes clean or away
that is of a rare brilliance
She heals my damaged soul
and fades my hidden scars 
beneath the glass gates
beneath the nervous smiles
beneath the unwilling goodbye
beneath the pain 
My Madison does exist


Details | Lyric | |

Teach Me How To Love

I was born beautiful
But…deformed by men
Lead me the way… 
To humanity


Details | Lyric | |

105

105
105
I just hit 105
Am I alive?
Am I alive?
Driving in rage at 105
Run away
Run away
Leave behind this day
105
105
I can’t escape going 105
A lonely heart
still falls apart
No matter how fast you go


Details | Free verse | |

Madison on my mind......

The dry sand blends with her flesh
   as I sink into that coffee cream fresh valley
      that peeks beyond the safe beats of a bellybutton
         tapping against the winds of me

Rain runs against the porcelain bottom
     as she releases hidden sounds from her aching soul
         that resist me through distance but shall fail
            to the desire of our entwined chance in time


Details | Dramatic monologue | |

Take It

By the pale of dawn
I took back my love
And by the dark of night
I told two lies
Never again will I wish
For a lover's bloodstained kiss
Nor remember him with weeping eyes

You stole me from a peaceable sleeping
And brought me to the enchanted place
Then turned me loose upon the wind
And showed to me a stranger's face

Take from me all youth and grace
Beauty, wit and strength to care
Take from me my dreaming eyes
Rosy mouth and twilight hair
Take from me this heart forlorn
Newly formed and newly torn
And throw it to the raging sea
Else you will not depart from me


Details | Rhyme | |

I Remember

wobbly age ridden legs
struggle down the stairs
another glass of wine.....
so what, who cares?

friend, lover, or deceptive one,
how do I know the reality?
my patch-quilt teddy bear,
my only link to sanity...
still at your beck and call,
I give you all my poems
hope you love them all

but alone at night,
when the truth sinks in,
I am a man alone,
without my beloved kin

I've tried to be a good man
it seems I rarely succeed,
seems all that I admire
are the things I really need

my Rosie, my Rosie...
are you still truely mine?
or some lucky someone else,
if that's the case, just fine

one November 1970 kiss
sealed my unhappy fate
for the rest of my earthly time,
I have little choice but to wait...


Details | I do not know? | |

hallucination

i love you
the instant you spoke those words
my senses shook
as the sight of a cool spring in the desert sand
i wanted to drink until my belly imploded  with satisfaction
those words held much power over my life
but were plucked away
corrupting my once blue oasis
into a septic pit of suffocating pain
you extend your hand to save me
and i do not reach for it
i dare not reach for it


Details | Free verse | |

THE ONE

Staying out late at night she is a taker of substance
with a golden tongue she speaks untruths
all with out reluctance.

Like a captured pray I dangle from her web
I am slowly being devoured
very soon I will be dead.

Where is my defender from this torment
my soul cries for mercy
yet the sorrow remains consistent

So little I would not have done
my love was true as I lay now the prisoner 
of her----- "the one".


Details | Lyric | |

Untitled

It’s no gain to waste all this pain.

A disgrace to not always hide this face.

My mind is lame, and it’s a shame,

to feel so numb and not be dumb.

I hate to say life’s not always been this way.

It’s an outrage that I ever lived outside this cage.

Apathy works best for me.

Cold-hearted to myself, the cheaply departed.

Sadness makes me the happiest. 

My loneliness makes me feel so blessed.

This bitter resentment fills me with contentment.

My biggest folly ever was delaying this melancholy.

However this ailment is reaching my fulfillment,

Leaving me empty, sad, happy and whole.

My bitterness is such bliss.

A feeling that I would surely miss.

I often lament evading this torment.

This suffering is the greatest thing ever.

I frequently regret never being upset.

Now I daily look forward to the sorrow that’s promised by tomorrow,

and I pray it comes each and everyday.

Without its displeasure I cannot carry on,

for it is my greatest treasure.


Details | Lyric | |

Pictures

I burned the pictures
Every one of you and me
The love notes and teddy bears
Yes, I burned everything

I destroyed all the evidence
And all you left behind
But as I sleep, I'm haunted
By the pictures in my mind

Every 'I love you'
Every time we laughed
All the whispered words
It all comes rushing back

Drowning in the memories
Left unhealed by time
And resurrected nightly
By these pictures in my mind

My pillow, the only witness
Of tears that fall like rain
And silent sobs that echo
With guilt, fear and shame

Denial keeps me going
And refuses to see the signs
Believing all is well
With these pictures in my mind

The days pass so quickly
With never a thought of you 
But day slips into dusk
And with the darkness, there is always you

With every day's new dawning
I wake hoping to find
That with the next moon's rising
I'll be rid of these pictures in my mind

I hope, I wish, I pray
Somewhere, someplace, sometime
To finally find the flame
That burns these pictures in my mind


Details | Free verse | |

Remember Me

Remember me, on a sunny day
When springtime breezes soften,
Your already soft skin,
And softer heart,
One that's touched deep upon mine,
Remember the burning organ solo I played,
That stunned your ears and heart...
That pile of endless daily letters I sent you....
That look in my eyes that said what words can't.
That music I wrote for you,

Performed for you,
The meals I cooked for you,
The ears that heard your words,
The love shared,
Unselfish love
Shared sadness,
Twisted, heated bodies,
Ecstasy of the Gods,
Awaking together,

And our last farewell,
Remember me.

I will remember you.


Details | Couplet | |

Love, Hate And My Fate

In my quest of life sublime
I face a mountain I must climb

There dwells up inside of me
A growing amount of hostility

My anger is growing day by day
Regardless of the prayers I pray

Like two grinding tectonic plates
One is love and the other is hate

As the plates slowly grind away
Price of hate my love must pay

Like a beautiful exotic dance
Hate is held in dark romance

Like a lone mountain flower
Love shall hold mystic power

The two sides of a single face
Only one can rule this place

Off to hell fallen angels go
Is this the fate of my soul?

Is the meaning of this rhyme?
Bound by the hands of time

For all to hear and all to see
Love and hate each dwell in me

Love and hate each have their goal
I wonder, which shall win my soul




Details | Free verse | |

I'm Sorry-A Poem for my kids-Jani, Billy, Josh, and Kristin

I'm sorry to all of my children
How I wish I could go back to change
The wrong things I've put you all through
And to make time rearrange
Those times to good moments for all of you
I'm sorry for what my life, fears and screw ups have put all four of you through
I simply rolled with what those fears handed me
Yes I so should've done more
And not just let it be
I was so scared and didn't really know what to do
When you're standing inside a house with the rook on fire
Well you, in that moment, are to blind to see
What's happening all around
Now I see it all to clearly and the fire is burning everything down to the ground
I'm sorry I wasn't there for you like I should've been
There's no excuse for it
Those wounds you now bear may not ever mend
And I live with that everyday
But that doesn't mean the love that I feel
For each one of you isn't real
It most certainly is
I'm not asking any of you to forgive me or accept my apology
But know that this all comes from my heart
Pain and rage will tear ones soul apart
And none of these words will make the past different, go away or any better
We do still have a chance, however, to overcome it and get through the stormy 
weather together
Being better people in the end
So while this don't make my mistakes you bear go away
I still need to say
You can hate me more and more everyday
If that's what is helping you to get by and cope
But no matter how much hate you have for me, I still love all four of you 
unconditionally
Perhaps one day you can each find it in your hearts to forgive me
Not for me, but for yourselves cause it's truly the only way you'll ever fully be able to 
move on........Love Mom


Details | Epic | |

We Lost More Than a Dad

We lost more than just a Dad that day
We lost half of how we came to be
We lost we four girls first love
We lost our Best Friend

We lost more than just a Dad that day
Our Mom lost her Soul Mate, Her other half 
Our children lost their Papaw
We lost our family’s foundation 
We lost the glue that held us together

We lost more than just a Dad that day
We lost the Strongest man we ever knew 
We lost the man we looked up too
We lost we four girls Teacher of many things

We lost more than just a Dad that day
We four girls lost our Hero
We lost some of our Light
We lost part of our Heart
We lost part of our Soul

We lost more than just a Dad that day
We lost some of our Courage
We lost some of our Strength
We lost some of our will to fight back
We lost some of our will to carry on
We four girls lost more than a Dad
We lost more than just a Dad that day


Details | Lyric | |

I Hate You Cancer

Dedicated to my Dad who lost his short battle w/ Colon Cancer on June 18,2013

I hate you Cancer
Your vile evil and cruel
You don't care who you hurt
I'll never forget that day
I'll always hate you for it

Your heartless Cancer
You took someone important from me
Someone important from others too
Took people who didn't belong to you
I hate you for it

You disgust me Cancer
You had no right to take him from me
He mattered more than my very own life
I hate you for taking my Daddy
I hate you for taking others too

I hate you with a passion Cancer
You took part of my heart with him
You took part of my soul that day too
I hate you for it
I hate you I hate you I hate you

I hate you with every fiber of my being 
Go back to Hell where you belong
I hate you, others hate you
Your not welcome or wanted here Cancer

I hate you more than his doctor's
I hate you more than God
I hope I get to witness that day
Witness the day you fall
And you will fall Cancer

You're gonna lose the battle one day Cancer
I'm gonna laugh and dance around your grave
You'll finally get what you deserve 
And you'll never be able to take another soul


Sabrina Niday Hansel


______________________________________________________________________
Placed 8th in Poet Destroyer A's  2013 "PINKTOBER" Contest

Please Support a Cure for Colon Cancer & every other type!









Details | I do not know? | |

Want

I want you want what?


Details | Couplet | |

The Pirates Love

Out on the shore he looked away, drawn by the oceans crashing waves; out on the shore her
heart it broke, as she watched him stop to smoke.

They knew that ties of love would sever, that he would go away forever; ne’er to return to
this shore, ne’er to see her, his love, anymore.

And so the sloop the pirate boarded, where all his treasure he had hoarded; away he sailed
to far new lands, to take from others with his hands.

Though he seemed so heartless and cruel, even he had loved a girl; and on a shore so far
away, they hanged the pirate there today.

She heard the news, her heart it wept, and so she plunged into the depth; her body found
broken and maimed, death the choice she had claimed.


Details | Munaajaat | |

Tell Me

I'm lost hurt and angry
Why did you take his life
I want, No I need to know
Tell me, Tell me why
I deserve to know

Haven't you done enough to him
What'd he ever do to you
He suffered his whole life
Suffered more than anyone deserved
Tell me, Tell me why you did it
I have a right to know

Why'd you let him born to them
Born to worthless parents
Parents who didn't care
They threw him away like garbage
Pawned him off on someone else
Tell me, Tell me why
Explain how you could do that

You gave him Polio
You let others treat him like disease
You took away the full use of his legs
You warped his hand and foot
Tell me, Explain to me why
I deserve to know

You let others think he was crazy
You let it go on for over year
You didn't stop it, Why
Tell me, Give me your reason
Answer me, Help me to understand

You go and make matters worse
You gave him Cancer
You didn't give him a chance to fight back
You just jerked him away from us
Tell me, Tell me how
How you could be so cruel

How can others not question you
When others do it, It's murder
But when it's by your hand
It's your will, Their fate
Tell me, What makes you so different
Your no better than the demons knocking at the door

You heard me beg and plead
You know I'm not afraid to die
I was willing to carry it all for him
I was willing to take my Daddy's place
You didn't even let me say Goodbye
Tell me, Tell me why I couldn't take his place
Answer me, you owe me that much



Sabrina Niday Hansel
~Niday40873~

(motif) Spiritual


Details | Lyric | |

Don't Cry

Please don't cry over my casket 
For I am not there 
Please don't cry at my grave 
My soul has been set free 
I know it's hard not to cry 
I've been down that road one to many times 

I have no more pain 
I have no more sickness 
And I would not change a thing 
As I walk threw the gates of Heaven 
Mom Dad our brothers and sisters 
Will welcome me with open arms 
Here I am free of that pain 

Don't blame yourself 
It was my time to go home 
This is where I'm supposed to be 
Don't dwell on things which you can not change 
I will always be in your heart 

I will always be watching over you 
When that day comes for you to come home
I will be there to welcome you 
With open arms
And walk you threw the gates of Heaven 
You will be greeted by our family & friends
Who came home before you 
Until that day I will be watching over you


Details | Couplet | |

A Prayer for my Wife

                           A Prayer for my Wife


Now I’ll tell you all the details if I can keep from sheddin’ a tear
Last night when it got late and really quiet around here 

I got down on my knees, crossed my heart and began to pray
And in the darkness between me and God, here’s what I had to say

I love her so much Lord and I just don’t know what I’d do
I’m afraid that she won’t make it, that’s why I’m coming to you

Here with my heart open, at your mercy down on my knees
I’m begging’ you with every heartbeat, Oh Lord hear my pleas

I don’t know what your plans are or what you have in store
And I know I don’t deserve her and that she deserves much more

And don’t misunderstand Lord, I don’t assume any obligation
For your bounty in our life has exceeded all our expectations

But please allow her to live and me to be a part of that life
And I swear I’ll make this beautiful woman proud to be my wife

And if it’s not in your plans Lord then I pray that you take me instead
Cause’ I can’t live without my love, I’d be better off dead

And no excuses for my past Lord, but I’ll do better than I’ve done
I ask you only this, my lord, in the name of your Son.

I wiped my tears as I said my amen’s and prepared myself to stand
Stepped up next to your bed and began to caress your pretty hand

I stared off into space as all the memories came flooding in
Reliving each and every moment, over and over again

And as the first rays of sunshine, streamed in past the curtain
I felt an overwhelming peace calm my mind and ease the hurtin’

I felt compelled to kiss you so I pressed my lips to your face
And it seemed the room was filled in the beauty of God’s living grace

And you slowly opened your eyes and smiled for me to see
And I knew the Lord my God had given my sweet wife back to me


Details | Lyric | |

The Sex Confessions

The Bed
Your Mouth
My Touch
Our Lips

It’s a fever
In the night
Forbidden

Forbidden

Desecrated and damned together
Desecrated and damned forever
One naked flesh, we’ll die together
One naked flesh, making love forever

The Flame
Your Cries
My Salt
Our Wounds

It’s a fever
In the night 
Forbidden

Forbidden

Desecrated and damned together
Desecrated and damned forever
One naked flesh, we’ll die together
One naked flesh, making love forever


The Earth
Your Rain
My Seed
Our Life

It’s a fever
In the night 
Forbidden

Forbidden. 

Desecrated and damned together
Desecrated and damned forever
One naked flesh, we’ll die together
One naked flesh, making love forever

Hell
Regrets
Confessions
Of Love

Your  Love
My Love
Our Love
Love

It’s a fever
In the night 
Forbidden

Forbidden. 

Desecrated and damned together
Desecrated and damned forever
One naked flesh, we’ll die together
One naked flesh, making love forever



Details | Lyric | |

More Than Words...

Once again as my pen fails the page
In a humble but sincere effort
To honor my loving sage

As I ponder and attempt to deduce
In a low, soft chuckle, “more than words”
My rhetorical excuse

By function; words exact, color and define
And with Webster’s sword levied I chase
Definition of you into the sublime

Concept, newly born of insight and ash
Presents no attempt at justice
So its fate is sealed to trash

And alas, as a thousand times tense
I seek to corral feelings
By pen within paper fence

For moment’s sake, suppose these words I cannot cage
I humbly offer in place of love song
The feelings that surround this page


Details | Free verse | |

Three Verbs

a well dressed mess,
I am but a man
with a sinister past
seeking redemption.

b*tching,
venting,
& ranting.
are three verbs I tend
to utilize while writing.
because writing is my outlet,
my craved for aperture,
even my superlative release
in the pursuit of an escape
from a reality which once
was capable of compelling 
my lips to crease into a smile,
but now only fills my chest 
with the tension of a thousand
cold-sweat soaked nightmares.
These three vulgar verbs
keep my mind lucid
through my abdication
of actuality for the
necessary occupation 
of thought required 
to keep these demons 
composed of crushed pills
and empty bottles at bay.

I feel the genius today.
I love every word, letter,
and line that I'm writing.
but tomorrow I'll hate this.
I'll think this sh*t is worthless
as I consider deleting it all.
Yet I can't part with it.
like my utter inability to
forget & let go of this fading
amatory connection whose
love once gave me hope as
well as sex that left scars,
both cerebral and somatic.
I loved her so f***ing much
and if I'm being honest, 
I must admit I still do.

as a parting favor
I simply ask you not
to confound these
words I write with
apathy and despair;
 they may sting off
the tip of my tongue
but they come from
a place that's sincere
and filled with more
than mere goodwill.
I simply have a crestfallen
& despondent perspective.

This, too, will
pass with time.
or so they say.


Details | Verse | |

Mind and Sound

Only light can penetrate the 
darkness
that resides in the default state 
of mind
I descend from beta to delta 
through
binaural beats; instantly caught 
between frequencies beyond 
time 

I absorb amplitudes of acoustic 
energy
and I learn to just be earth 
Since I am the earth 
and because I am of
the one that is the source of its 
existence, 
I've owned the power of 
omnificence 

I realize now that I AM because
HE is since I am from that, a 
descendant 
Created in the image of a 
thought
and a feeling from the 
Universal Mind
I tune in to this vibration from 
rhythmic
pulse that manipulates 
subconscious minds

Immersed  between 4 and 7 
hertz;
brainwaves halt to a conscious 
sleep
All  chakras are aligned shining 
crown energy 
and now my consciousness 
begins to reap! 
and light begins to penetrate 
the harmonious beams
that were already there
constant and always there 

is now flooded with sound 
patterns
that force brainwaves to submit 
to power
of omnipresent sound that 
always was 
and always will be connected to 
the Source from which I came
so I extend exponentially 
beyond;
physical time and space

I long to embrace the intensity 
of gamma rays
I give way to the coded sounds 
that resonate from the inner 
core
and continue to connect 
through the binaural beats that 
-  
remind me of before

Always familiar but ignored
until found by gaining 
knowledge of self
I listen with the intent to excel 
while reaping an abundance of 
benefits and rewards
Listen!! 
It's already yours

Just reach out and grab it 
as long as intention and ego is 
checked
the universe will correspond 
accordingly
it will deliver a life to you divine 
and orderly
Just listen to the sounds that 
were there from before
They will guide to to the 
vibration from the core
and it will guide you to connect 
directly with the source 




Details | I do not know? | |

Fortunate Is An Antonym For You And I

I miss you,
You threw me away,
Away without a second thought,
A thought about how I'll hurt,
Hurt like the five other girls you played with,
Without a goodbye you left,
You left with cruel words upon your lips,
Your lips I've always wanted to kiss,
To kiss so tenderly and heartbreakingly,
And heartbreaking is all I feel,
I feel your eyes upon me as I pass,
I pass like we had no past,
Our past was one big lie,
A lie you gratefully tell,
Tell to anyone who will listen,
Listen with open ears,
With open ears I hear,
Hear all the tall tales,
Tales about you and I,
I being the less fortunate,
Fortunate is an antonym for you and I. 


Details | Elegy | |

The Lament For an Angel

All in one faded-black day (but let None forget) In my arms, her body lay (my life was the price to pay) A tragedy, through the lack of humanly shame (do they know pain) My darkly colleen has to suffer no more (Robert nor do you) Let me die (please hear my haunted cries) If I can not see Sophie tonight (live on with my grey) I'm just a mess of despairing words And broken nerves Another mourning, afflicted sight (through decay, love can remain) Solace, sympathy are just more lies She is all I need Until you decide she is just another sadist's toy My Angel, why did you have to fly so far away My Angel, just let one feather stay My Angel has flown away My Angel, why did you have to fly so far away My Angel, just let one feather stay My Angel has flown away (My body is amortal, die I may, Together, our hearts will forever stay)


Details | Ballad | |

For the love of Princess Rose

For the love of Princess Rose.

Way back in the darkest times
There lived a wondrous Knight
He had blue eyes, and a handsome face
And his mind was very bright
He lived for goodness, his ideals
Were the highest in the land
And everybody loved this knight
They thought him mighty grand.

He shrunk from no one in the land
He’d fought ten dragons too
As he vied for the love of Princess Rose
Oh, he loved her so true
Yet she was loved by another knight
And so they had to fight
That was the way in those dark days
It was considered right

A tournament it was arranged
And the two men faced each other
Both swore that until the end
They would never love another
The fight was on, as Rose, she watched
The man she loved so much
Fight a man she could not bear
Who her heart did not touch.

Now Don, he was the Knight of choice
He fought like a blessed demon
He was not an evil man
Yet he was filled with Venom
And when the fight was over with
Her knight of choice did win
As love did conquer everything
And the princess married him.

13 August 2013 1147hrs.


Details | Free verse | |

Last Words

All i want from you is me...


Details | Rhyme | |

The Right Thing to Do

Written 7 March 2014
-------------------------------------

Bruce and Jennie, both were 10,
Had been playmates all their lives.
One day, Bruce proclaimed,
“Jennie… most good men have wives.”

He professed his love for her.
Jennie said she loved him too.
They decided that getting married
Was ‘the right thing’  to do.

So, Bruce went to speak to her father,
Who was doing yard work at the time.
“May I speak to you, Mr. Johnson?”
“Sure, Bruce. What’s on your mind?”

“Sir, I love your Jennie;
And Jennie, she loves me;
But we need your permission
To be married… to be “We.”

Impressed by Bruce’s courage,
He knew this confrontation must be tough.
He smiled and asked, “Bruce, are you sure
You love my daughter enough?”

Bruce’s face became stern, he said,
“Mr. Johnson, let me tell you…
I love Jennie so much…and she loves me.
We’re both sure it’s the right thing to do.”

He was moved by Bruce’s ardor,
But permission was not his to give.
So, quick as flash, he responded,
“But Bruce…where will you live?” 

“Sir, I measured her room;
Then I measured mine.
Hers is 40 percent bigger.
We’ll live there.  We’ll be fine.

If we have extra stuff,
We’ll keep that in my room.
We’ll keep our places neat and tidy.
You won’t even need a broom.

And both our parents can save money 
On babysitters too.
Even if you do things on the same night,
You’ll only need one sitter, not two.”

Mr. Johnson was impressed with his logic,
But this marriage idea was no longer funny.
He smiled and said, “That’s good thinking, Bruce;
But what are you gonna do for money?

“Why, Mr. Johnson, I get twelve-fifty a week allowance;
And let me remind you, Jennie also gets ten.
Throw in our birthdays and Christmas cash….
Why, we might even have money to lend.”

Desperate now, he thought, 
“Next, I guess they’ll want a car.”
Then he asked, “But Bruce, what if you have kids?”
"Aawww," blushed Bruce... “We’ve been lucky so far.”
 


Details | Ballad | |

London

She called herself London
On that day 
She fell from the sky
Child of apple blossoms
Dancing wildly
Into your mind

The snake that hung from her neck
Bites your hand
Expels you from Eden
Tears into the cool flesh
Of your madness
Posing as reason

London
Kisses you like a sweet lover
As though she really cares
Lets you 
Taste the passionate orchard
In her body’s secret lair

London
Wrestles with all your demons
Nothing quite compares
To the pain 
The indecent pleasure
In the waters that you share

Her name was London
Call her London

She called herself London
On that night
She prayed to the moon
Apollo’s lyre
Played darkly
In a portent 
Of your own doom

The hell she hides 
In her soul
Toxic drug you’ll never escape
You crave the milk of her touch
Her strange and dangerous ways

London
Kisses you like a sweet lover
As though she really cares
Lets you 
Taste the passionate orchard
In her body’s secret lair

London
Wrestles with all your demons
Nothing quite compares
To the pain 
The indecent pleasure
In the waters that you share  

Her name was London
Call her London

My baby, London
Call her London
My moon-girl, London 
Call her London

I love her, London
Call her London
Forever, London 

I call her London……


Details | Light Poetry | |

Love and War

I hear the voices
Choirs sing in the skies
I try again like you did before
Depressed I know there is no more

I listen to past voices
Songs sing in my head
For sure a proof I am not dead
Depressed, I am on the floor

Once we danced with the moon above
I held your soul in the night air
Kisses in the dark made us hunger
Yet here I am alone, starving

Shadows of love, a wisp of desire
Music drifts into the night
From the local pub
Where I was and where I shall I die

On my horse, I ride far far away
Guided by the stars, I escape from you
Styrie shall live to an old age close to you
I shall die a distant memory

My Waterloo


Details | Narrative | |

[IN]SANITY

I've counted the bars of my prison walls. 3 sides of 10 bars; 30. One solid wall,
cold, wet, molded concrete.
I've lost count of how long I have been here,
I hardly remember when I got here, but, it’s been winter
for a long time.
I've forgotten what it is to move in grass and amongst other bodies.
I am chained in here,
thick steel cuffs chain me to the wall.
I've counted the faces, whose names I can't remember,
and then lost count of them
as they flash and flicker, fast forwarded in my mind.
I've been motionless for a long time,
I’m not sure I even remember what movement is.
I’m not sure I can even remember to move.
I’ve forgotten who I am, my name, how old I am
how tall I am, my features, likes and dislikes;
there are no mirrors.
I’ve been nameless for a long time, and there is no one else
here in this vast blank expanse but me and these bars,
and one wall.
I’ve realized I don’t even know what I am
and that panics me, but I know not what this feeling is?
What Is feeling?
I’ve thrown myself at the bars, clawing at the nothing
that lies behind them.
What Is nothing?
I’ve discovered there is a name that echoes and echoes In the vastness,
how do I know that name?
Is it mine, yours, theirs, his, ours?
I’ve remembered, the memories crush into me,
a weight I had not known for unknown amounts of time.
No go away! Again, please...
I’ve tried to forget,
but the white walls are somewhere out there, waiting.
and I? Why, I do not even exist.
[IN]SANITY


Details | Rhyme | |

Thoughts That Grow Louder

With a whispered thought comes a dream
To be above the shame and guilt
Of losing pride in what would seem,
To most, the whole of what we built.

With a quiet thought comes the fear,
And shadows close the doors of reason.
I see racing frames of pictures clear, 
Rendering unbearable deeds of treason.

With that clear thought, I stand corrected-
So much love has come and gone,
But I, alone, must stay connected 
To what I know and where I belong.


Details | Acrostic | |

Reflections: Midlife Crisis

P     aranoia permeates, etching itself into your fractured face,
A     cacophony of constant pressure; life remains a stressful race,
N     othing to hope for, no positives like promotion in the workplace,
I      nability to love, relationships lift anchor and set sail without chase,
C     hildren crushing dreams under mortgages; age grows with disgrace
!!


Details | Free verse | |

A seed of love planted in the soil of my heart

I sailed unaware into 
the ocean currents 
of her life:
and 

smitten, I 
desired to ride 

them with her;
somewhere 
along 
the ocean ways, a 

seed of love 

planted in the soil of
my heart had taken root 
and grew--only to perish 
like 

a young hope 

that's fleeting:
though I loved her, 
she 

still wounded
me 

like a careless 
knife. 

In spite of 
this and myself, 
I looked 

for encouragement
in her stare; 
and 

at the outlines 
of her graceful 
form 

I did wonder: 
she was 

indeed 

a Helen of Troy, a prize, 
on whose loveliness 
I 

so richly gorged! 

But never was 
a lonely man 
more wretched 
than 

I was, 

as she could 
not return my
affections  

with equal measure of feeling.  

I would be more
glad had she been 
unwedded to another,
and   

could easily be within 
my desirous 
and
jealous 

orbit! 

In time, I 
never 

saw 
her again;

and love, or the 
appearance of it--like 
an aborted 

fetus

flushed down the 
toilet--died 

with her parting 
as well!



Details | I do not know? | |

I'm Sorry For Being So Cold

My words may feel so cold,
Yet this feeling of falling and 
Then trying to be so loving
Eventually misleads me to 
Feeling like she or myself 
Is gradually shoving my feelings 
Through an invisible door.

It's all so not worth 
Letting this sorrow corner me in,
My mind is wondering if I'm truly fine with
Having no one special in my own current life.

My reasons for trying to 
Move onwards from there
Were nothing but idealized dreams
Turning into unpleasant realities. 

Who knew that a few days 
After those euphoric moments
I would be realizing that 
The strings of my heart were pulled
By desires so unnecessary for healing 
My own inner strife.

My words may have been so cold,
But it's only because this sorrow I go through
Will always continue beyond tomorrow.

You don't deserve being 
My eternal object of depression,
Yet you are also even taking it 
All too simply to be the object
Of my true love and affection.

My feelings from loving you 
Were absolutely true,
But I now see I was so wrong 
In believing in my own naïve thoughts.
So fleeting was the beautiful 
Rendering of my soul,
Except that no one knew then 
That it was only a game of pretend.

Wanting my first kiss returned, 
Yet again I guess first can mean the worst,
So I guess I'll find someone 
Who will become my second best.
After telling you I can't love you anymore, 
I now feel as if I can finally rest.

My words were only so cold,
Because something in the depths of my heart
Was calling out to be heard.

In the end though I have released myself
From the bittersweet feelings I gained from 
My voice and feelings that once were forsaken.
I'm sorry for being so cold.


Details | Iambic Pentameter | |

WET DREAMS

        WET DREAMS
I know not why your love's evading me
nor what to do, so that your heart can see,
my passion grows no matter what I do
and makes my heart to keep on loving you
though all it's brought is pure insanity;

in dreams I've wept, but kept on loving you
and tears, they flow, no matter what I do,
I tried to take my burning love in hand
but it's a thing my heart can't understand,
and sleep won't tell what love is coming to;

if I could dream the dream both night and day
I'd spend my life just sleeping where I lay
and waking from the dream in burning sweat,
I lie content, and feel my hand is wet
from love you've given me, in your own way.
© ron wilson aka vee bdosa


Details | Rhyme | |

The Happy Dress

It’s a mother-in-law’s right, her prerogative 
To ‘drop in’ on her son almost any time,
But a mother-in-law should always be prepared
For almost anything she may find.

So, Mother Cready dropped in unannounced;
But as she approached her son’s front door,
Suddenly it opened.  “Ta Da!  Do you like my happy dress?”
His young wife stood there in her ‘all in all’…nothing more.

“Oh, my word!” Mother Cready exclaimed with surprise.
“Why are you naked?  Are you insane?”
Just as surprised, the young wife pulled her inside.
“Please, Mother Cready…if you’ll just let me explain.

You see, when Mac has had a rough day,
When he’s been under a lot of stress,
Sometimes I meet him at the door
With a smile and a kiss in my happy dress.

It always relaxes him and makes him happy,
Then he makes me very happy too.
It works for Mac and me, Mother Cready;
Maybe it would work for you.”

“We’re too old for such.” scoffed Mother Cready.
“Perhaps if we were young like the two of you.”
But, on her way home, she decided
She was definitely going to try it too.

So, she bathed and put on some nice perfume,
Fixed her make-up and her hair.
She was thinking some very sexy thoughts,
But she had to hurry…no time to spare.

She heard her husband’s car in the driveway;
And as he approached their front door,
She threw it open.  “Ta Da! Do you like my happy dress?"
She stood there in her ‘all in all’…nothing more.

She saw a little grimace cross his face,
But that was not the worst.
Then he said, “I appreciate your happy dress, my dear;
But maybe you should have ironed it first.”

ALTERNATE LAST VERSE

“Well…your ‘happy dress’ could use some ironing;
But my birthday suit could use some starch.”
He kissed her. “Bet you and I can work it out.”;
And off to bed they marched.


Details | Limerick | |

The Good the Bad and the Ugly Divorce

Let Him Go (Limerick)

Our mom told us how she chose her beau,
With an “eeny, meeny, miny, moe!”
Of course it didn’t last,
With a choice so half-assed!
But at least it taught the fool to grow!


Child Support (Haiku)

Parental disputes
Had placed us in the middle
Of their divorce wars


Divorce (Couplet)

He left her to fend for us alone, blasé with his remiss,
She chose to break this conjugal bond without marital bliss.


For (Destroyer ((Poet’s ~DIVORCE CLUB~ Contest


Details | Light Poetry | |

The Kiss that Never Was

I was kissed
Long ago
I wept long before
I never let go

You have become my dream
You've broken into my heart
So now I weep yet again
You wont, mercy be, let me go

I held your hand in a dream
I caressed the blood of your heart
To give you life
I weep once more

My lungs are filled with water
I am drowning in desire
I weep at this very moment
My passion shall murder me

Pastel tears, painted tomorrow
Monet warned me of Parisian blues
All that I can grasp in the palm of my hand
Why am I denied the touch of love?

In the haze of such thoughts
I beg of you
Let it rain day and night
So that I may drown in your arms


Details | Free verse | |

Love, Death, and Rebirth

The signs started in December
When she started waking up in tears each night
She was a normal girl with dark brown hair and darker brown eyes
She had plenty of friends and a loving family with just one thing missing
Her father. 

Days passed by and turned into weeks but only felt like a few seconds
Her life just whizzed by faster and faster until it was just a whirr in front of her eyes
Darkness filtered into her heart and mind until she didn't know if she could go on
But she had to. She couldn't let her mother and her sister drown in this same pain
She wouldn't let them.

She pushed all the darkness into the depths of her own heart
In hopes to save the hearts of the two people she had left
Because what else was there to live for now?
The rest of her world had crashed and her mother and sister was all that was left 
She wouldn't let them drown in pain too. 

She watched as they started to heal in her loving arms
Their hearts started to lighten up once more
But hers was just as dark as it was before 
And growing darker day by day 
But she wouldn't let that stop her. 

Suddenly a year had passed... and then two 
It only seemed like seconds to her but everyone else started moving on
Her mother and sister no longer needed her nurturing care
But she needed someone to hold on to
Anyone...

With nothing left for her to take control of, the dark pushed past her boundries 
It found a way into her soul
Until all she could see was dark and no light 
But her mother and sister were healed now
They didn't understand

The tears came back and engulfed her soul
Bit by bit until she wasn't sure why she was still alive
The grief took over like knives 
Piercing her skin over and over and over
It hurt so much.

She started to wonder what it'd look like to be dead
She could see him again if she was
Wouldn't it be so much easier than having to endure this pain?
Wouldn't it be so much easier than having to live knowing she'd never see him again?
It would.

So she started to hate herself
All that negative energy was starting to take toll
Everyone around her was breathing while she suffocated more and more by the second
She wished she'd just choke already instead of living in constant pain
If no one would put her out of her misery, she'd have to do it herself

She couldn't see any light anymore
So she grabbed the pill bottle off the shelf and just hoped it wouldn't take long to die
Deep down she still had a spark of light, but she just couldn't find it 
And now it was too late in her mind to change, to turn back and try to look deeper
She was done living.

That's when people started to notice that everything wasn't as peaceful as it seemed
They started to see how deeply depressed she had become
They wanted to help her see the light again before it was too late 
So they sent her away to see doctors and to take pills to make everything better
It was a start.

She didn't see a change at first but suddenly she could think clearly
Maybe what they were doing was actually going to help her see the light again
Yes, she still wanted to die, but maybe that wasn't the only option anymore
They cared,  and behind all their own problems they were trying to understand
They really were trying

Six months longer she would be treated and cared for
Until suddenly she was sent home from her treatment and care with a smile on her face
She had a new perspective
Someone had helped her ignite that spark in her heart until it was a glowing ember
She had been reborn

Sometimes you have to be able to experience the worst of it
To come back shining brighter than before
And if she had died that cold day in October, she wouldn't of ever seen the best of it
Or known that it would get better
and it did!

And she now sits at her laptop, with a smile on her face and warmth in her heart
It's never been an easy road and it won't ever be
But at least she knows she's lived through the worst
And it can only get better from here

So whenever she feels lonely or gets back into that dark spot again
She can look back on what she's learned and can read this poem
And remember that she survived the darkest depths of depression
And she will continue to survive it as long as she lives
Because she is stronger now than she ever was before ?


Details | Elegy | |

Where are you

You flourished and blurred
like a spark on wind

Gracefully and quickly like a frightened hind
in pursuit of light

You harvested through bushy meadows
taken by blight

In struggle with plight
had you lost your might

And gave out
although never you gave up.

Where are you?
For you must be still there.

For I still can feel you
somewhere in the air.


Details | Narrative | |

REMEMBER ME

When you don't know how many tomorrows you'll have, 
You tend to focus in the immediacy of today;
A homeless child just trying to survive.
Rummaging through dump rubbish every day.

Another afternoon in this hellish forsaken place, 
Ankle deep in garbage scavenging a dinner plan;
Feeling particularly weak and sick on my stomach, 
When a large group pulled up in two white vans.

The slide doors of these vans opened fast, 
And well dressed people jumped out in a hurry;
Honestly, I was glad that I wasn't too close, 
They were strangely awkward, I was worried.

The group spoke a different language, 
I think they were from The United States;
Most of them were snapping pictures, 
Which is something I do not appreciate.

They were drinking cold bottles of water, 
What I'd give just to have a taste;
I'd be happy with a half empty hot bottle, 
In this sewage minefield of trash and waste.

One of the strangers seemed different, 
There was something about his eyes;
He seemed to look right into my soul, 
As I stood there swatting away flies.

It's hard to describe what I was feeling, 
Although little time had actually passed;
There on that filthy hill I felt a bonding, 
I remember wanting this moment to last.

On his face I saw sadness and passion, 
He could tell I was a boy totally broken;
Existing day to day on this stench heap,
We were talking but no words were spoken.

Then someone in the group said something, 
And the group quickly boarded up to go;
Except for the one locked in on me, 
From the vans they shouted "Come on, Joe!"

He ran to the van.. and grabbed something, 
Then with sensed urgency he rushed over to me;
The kind stranger delivered two ice cold waters, 
His contagious smile was large and friendly.

As he turned to go I tapped him on his shoulder, 
He swung around I was shocked to see tears;
I felt a simple pure love from this angel,
Who from out of nowhere suddenly appears.

Walking back to the van he turned and waved, 
I took a long drink to salute.. no longer thirsty;
The rest of my life this moment sealed in time, 
For him as well, I think Joe will always remember me!

For Brian's "Small Gifts" Contest
*He gave more than a Drink.. He gave Dignity! 

Narrative Poem 
From the city dump in Puarta Plata, Dominican Republic


Details | Villanelle | |

mother WHO i HATE

Mother, mother can't you see?
How much are you putting the needle,
Deep inside of  my heart?
I know the pain won't go away!
I know you are blind to see the truth!

Pain pain pain,
When will you go away?
Anger, hate & discouragement
Always comes my way!
What am I supposed to do?
I feel alone deep inside,
I feel the empty pressure against my chest,
In a prison of hate,
I am sick of the people who I love,
Betraying me & ruining the trust,
God above who sees your actions,
I hope He will never forgives you,
For you who keep on sin.

One day you will see 
Throw my eyes & my pain,
One day you will stop on pretend,
Realize your mistakes,
It will be too late,
I will be gone far away,
I will never come back again!


Details | Iambic Pentameter | |

BLOW YOU KISSES

 I'LL BLOW YOU KISSES
I'll blow you kisses like you've never known.
Perhaps they'll find your lips, when you're alone.
I'll say a prayer a dozen times a day,
and think your name, in everything I say.

I'll look for you in every girl I see.
When God smiles on your life, He smiles on me.
I'll listen for each sound of love from you,
between each thing in life I ever do.

I'll blow you kisses like no one has felt.
If I'd get one from you, I know I'd melt.
I'll say a prayer each time I visualize
the never ending light that is your eyes.

I'll hurt a thousand ways, if you're in pain.
Perhaps I'll die alone in Summer Rain.
But never shall I say, I don't love you,
No matter how much death I'm going through.


Details | Rhyme | |

Absence

Absence makes the heart grow fonder
Missing you for longer and longer

Deathly afraid my heart may burst
You may love me best...I love you worst


Details | Rhyme | |

The Social Norm

Drink the drink, and take the pills, lay on the medication.
But your soul's forever lost to them without persistent dedication.
There's things we've learned, and things we will, to decide us right from wrong.
But your ears are only open, now, to a techno-logic song.
Social norms have bound you tight, then cut you awf'ly deep.
And still your soul beneath the surface begs of you, relief.
You waded in their welcome waters, thought it nice and cool
But now I'm sure you've figured out you're lost in sorrows pool
So take it from who knows you best
Someone who has passed this test:

Before you drift out in the sea And the shore's no longer in your view, I promise that I'll bring you back And if I can't, I'll follow you. Before your legs and arms grow weak And you've passed your final tier, I promise that I'll hold your hand; I promise you I'll still be here. Before your lungs are filled with water And our souls are parted once again, I promise you that you're forgiven; I promise you I'm still your friend. Before you close your sunken eyes Inviting night to kill the day Know your bright was never slight And soon you'll see your way.


Details | Free verse | |

The Righteousness Of Love

Love is a wonder shared by one another it's the only reason I'm not six feet under Love in which I believe in a will to sustain I give back to life, now in dormant states of pain The power of Love may not alone be enough locked inside my dreams escape only from above higher than any human being has ever gone before I must have evolved rise above hate, great once more My Father taught me wisdom I am imprisoned no longer now an beast not of burden I am no lion, I am stronger on my shoulder sits twin dragons long awaiting the day evil forces come forth to take what Love is left, away A Hero of Love light are what the world needs angels, not demons exist where ever you believe follow your heart's direction and you shall achieve objects of affection rid of materialistic greed My bright energy has awakened to a fire never consuming the source as the flames just grow higher that is the desire of a product we call Love Fear, the counterpart what I was once made of I am slowly learning how to win when my peace is harder to sharpen so I have given my pen leave the sword has its uses I must say I believe to vanquish the evil in the minds too diseased to serve any purpose except their own selfish ones tomorrow a new day in the clarity of the sun where we two are now one and one done now does bring about a great change lit by the righteousness of Love.


Details | Free verse | |

Untitled IV

Yea...I am upset
Ticked off to say the least....
TIME!!! 
A real great friend you are!
ARrrgggHHHH!!!
I am just....cho...
sad.
TIME...TiMe.........(sigh)time....
what's your reason this time?


Details | Rhyme | |

Black and White

You’ve maddened me to the core 
You singed me with your ferocious fire
We’re opposites… we’ll never integrate  
We can’t blend with each other…
Your love and I’m hate 
We’re contrary to each other…

So don’t even think about 
Getting us back together 
Because without a doubt, 
We don’t click with each other…

So let us go our own way…

Everything’s black and white
You love to torture me with your deceptive devices 
We’re playing this chess match – let’s fight!
Tonight, you’re going to pay the prices
You’re going to be deleted from my mind…

I’m not the one that should pay the price
You act as if you’re an angel from heaven
But, you’re a fiend…a devil from hell...who needs your advice?
Could someone unchain me from this prison?

So let us prepare for that day…

Fear and bewilderment build inside of our minds
Taking over us…we’re wasting valuable time
Terror and wrath injects into our veins…time starts to unwind 
I’m regaining my glory…this moment feels so sublime  

You think you’re innocent?
I can sense your guilt…bleeding through you
Do you live to feed me anguish? 
Don’t deny it…you crafty demon…no wonder I feel blue

Let’s get ready for battle…
I’ll watch you decay…
IT’S PAY BACK TIME . . .
Taste my fury and my agony 

Everything’s black and white
You love to torture me with your deceptive devices 
We’re playing this chess match – let’s fight!
Tonight, you’re going to pay the prices
You’re going to be defeated…

I scream before nightfall
I close my eyes to kiss my demise
I want to disappear 
Scratch away my desolation
Wipe away my tears…
Spewing out of my eyes…like a waterfall
Tonight, there will be dismay
There will be suffering 
After sundown…
Failure and glory will expose like stars in the midnight sky
Who will earn the crown? 
No one knows in silent wars – who can reveal the light in goodbye
  
Why are we black and white?
Are you too afraid to know the reason why? 

Everything’s black and white
You love to torture me with your deceptive devices 
We’re playing this chess match – let’s fight!
Tonight, you’re going to pay the prices
You’re going to suffer alone…


Details | Sijo | |

Love Bomb

I will soon drop a bomb into your lovers hideaway
You will feel my passion exploding within your very soul
His defenses will never separate you from my love


First attempt at a Sijo.


Details | Ballad | |

You're Just A Stranger

Why do you despise me
why can't you let me be,
how come you always pestering me.
How come you can not see
I am beginning to turn my love away from thee
Just as you are turning your hate on me.

I proceed biting my words back 
and just nodding my head
you think i am the one to blame
but you'll end up losing me instead.
I try to talk to you, but you
cut me out and shut your ears
where will this get us
in fifteen or so years.
 
You bring down the pressure
while i try to do as you say
Only until i lose, you win
will you stop yelling and walk away.

Here i sit, expressing my stress on paper
only hoping tomorrow will bring
something better
and that i won't lose my life forever.
Please forgive me 
for this paper may be wet with tears
I know this is a stage in life,
I pray will pass in a few years. 

As i write my anger fades
but when i think about you it returns
I hope we both learn from this
For I may lack empathy
but you are always so very stern.
It seems everything I do
has gotten on your nerves
And I know you don't hold it inside
For your anger does surly splurge.

Tonight you have taken my phone
and cut me off from my friends I truly need
your words hit me hard,
and to you I can not plead.
Someday I may realize
what you did was probably right
I will try to understand,
I will try with all my might.
But until that day
or until through my eyes you see,
You are still a stranger
You're just a stranger to me.

Nov. 21. 2011


Details | Rhyme | |

The Pencil Sharpener

I, the sleeper and dreamer
Wish for your end
Is it wrong, blasphemer?
Should I break, should you bend?

I sharpen your demise on a pencil sharpener
Peeling you away….reaching your core of lead
Should I break or should you bend?
Or can’t I just wish for my end?

There’s knives protruding from your eyes
The eyes I know are dead
The blasphemer you are will reveal where your body lies
Beneath your core of lead

I found you among the disposables
Wishing for my end
I blasphemed you and you just gave back
My pencils burning with lead

I screamed as you pierced through me
I felt it in my soul!
But I’m to blame for this masterpiece
I sharpened you with gold!

The shavings fall upon the ground
And still this dream moves on
Pierced, I fall without a sound
Until the break of dawn

I, the sleeper and dreamer 
Am still pierced to this day
So I hand the pencil sharpener to you
And pray you’ll be with me 


Details | Narrative | |

The Final Confessions II

These were my confessions
(A message to God)
The light begins to fade
(It’s time to go)
Back into the shadows
(That hard black fog)
Where darkness has its way
(God rest your soul)

Nothing left to tell you
(It’s all been said)
No more songs to write
(This silent Fall)
Nothing left to offer 
(The well’s been bled)
From a shadow’s waning life
(Who lost it all)

Take my words and hold them
(Don’t be afraid)
Place them near your heart
(And heal your pain)
Shadow words will kiss you
(And heal your pain)
When your world turns dark
(Don’t’ be afraid)

And I kiss you
Kiss you
I kiss you in the dark……..


Details | Free verse | |

More Snippets

I. Bleeding -- a world without comfort -- lost without love -- no destination... silently walk without touching wounds... where is love? II. Frail fingers grope... sodden afternoons... winter fog... through gray eternity -- cold eyes, delicious mouth. Found love will laugh, desire returning. III. Making love, we deceived ourselves. Complicitors, we lied. Compliant pawns, we defied danger, practiced brilliant fabrication -- but truth was stranger. IV. Others know desire: ever changing years -- and lifetimes -- reaching towards the moon. Love, be my way.


Details | Lyric | |

Forever Changed

June 18, 2013 our world was Forever Changed
We where over halfway home
When we got the call from our baby sister

Said we need to get back home
We need to come as fast as we can drive
Mom really needs us
Something’s wrong with Daddy
The whole way we drove 80
Hoping & Praying we’d make it in time

Our Family & Friends were weeping 
By the time we got to his side
We knew our Daddy had been taking
And our hearts they were breaking
We never got to say Goodbye
We each softly kissed that man
We four sisters climbed in his bed 
We laid down beside him 
And cried just like babies
For our world was Forever Changed 
 
 


Details | Dramatic monologue | |

To a Bride Without a Name

Oh Flora, Choral Beauty The Sun Rises With You Out of An Abyss of Chaos, Yet No Piece of Beauty Is Lost I Can't Grant You Nobility, But Our Love's Vitality Will Last Till The Gates of Hades's Halls They Will Push, They Will Pull, And Their Power Will Grow Just To Have A Piece of Our Love's Immortality For It They Cannot Wait Subdued By Desperation's Phantom But I Will Always Be One of Them So, My Dear, Please Understand I'm Just A Chevalier Drenched With My Sins The Hope Will Fade The Rose Will Turn Black The Promise Was Just I Lie, Though I Forbade I Will Just Be Another Empty Heart, Slain By Your Loosening Grip On My Sanity I Will Die, You Will Be Free Believe - It's The Way Things Must Be My Dear, Just Understand


Details | Rhyme | |

This Poem

i write this poem to pass away the time
to make me forget that loving her was a crime
i sit here and type these endless awkward rhymes
to help me cope during the darkest of times
 
i write this poem to help my mind forget
to stop my eyes from crying, from getting wet
stop tears that flows when i am upset
i wish that she and i had never met
 
i write this poem because its all i can do
with a heart so sad, a life that's so blue
i wish that my love for her wasn't true
i wish i could live a life that is different and new
 
i write this poem that does not make any sense
about a feeling that is so hopelessly intense
i write it without even a trace of pretense
this is my last stand, my last line of defense
 
i write this poem to bid her goodbye
to my existence she will always be the reason why
though to my messages she won't reply
i will always love her until the day i die


Details | Kyrielle | |

Raven's End

I know that taking my life is a sin,
But you don’t know how much pain I am in;
Death is better than this hell I’ve been through,
God Grant me mercy for what I must do;

My tortured soul robs me of breath,
All I seek is the release of death;
Requesting redemption in the gun I cling to,
God Grant me mercy for what I must do;

I’m considering briefly the life I must end,
Nothing is left but the chance to transcend;
And this decaying body that I pass through,
God Grant me mercy for what I must do;

Raven they named me, but now they are gone,
I’m all alone since they both passed on;
Soon I will see them, it’s long overdue,
God grant me mercy for what I must do;

I beg for forgiveness as I let myself go,
Tears trickle down as I feel my heart slow;
Hopefully now I’ll get to see you,
So God grant me mercy for what I must do.


Tirzah Conway
~For the contest "Among the Dead"~


Details | Iambic Pentameter | |

THE BETRAYAL

     THE BETRAYAL
 Absconded from the scene, but dying fast,
 to seek a vengeance in a candle flame,
 I whisper names as prayers, a spell is cast,
 and goes about its deed--this is no game.

 The power none believe is really there;
 (or speak of, tongue in cheek, at very best)
 too soon is born and takes me everywhere,
 to ride the devil's beast upon my quest,

 and have no mercy, it will drive you mad,
 as you have done to me within my past,
 and just as soon, you'll lose the mind you've had,
 to whimper in the dark. The spell is cast.

 Breathe slowly now, and know this is your end,
 where once was written, you were safe and sane; 
 that on the day when you betrayed this friend--
 --your life has come to be eternal pain.
          ©  ron wilson (aka Vee Bdosa the Doylestown Poet)


Details | Free verse | |

The Tree of Sexual Knowledge




You were like a serpent

Wise, crafty

Whispering in my ear

The most extrodinary lies...

You were like the APPLE

Sweet and FORBIDDEN...

Once I BIT of your essence

My EYES were OPENED...

A myriad of colors

Assailed my senses

And pleasure

Like I've never known before

Left me quivering after you...

The simultaneous orgasm

Sounded like a fairy tale

Until...your cunning and craftiness

Showed me the way...

And now I know

The difference between GOOD s_x and BAD s_x...

I enjoyed your every touch

How you made my body feel alive!

But, now I have been

CAST AWAY from my GARDEN of pleasure

Cast away from YOUR LOVE and touch

Now, I must TOIL

In my own SWEAT and in the sun

Looking for a SERPENT

With the magic touch you held

Oh, to be BLIND once more!

Now, every man

Doesn't measure up

To your EVIL

Ecstasy of pleasure and SIZE

Now I am in the hot

Desert of the world

WEEPING and GNASHING

My teeth

trying to find

The GRAINS of GOOD s_x

Among the WEEDS

Of lousy lovers


Details | Ballad | |

Rose Hips Lady

Rose hips lady
Your field is ripe
Bury my torn body
In that rain-soaked night

Taste those sweet confessions
On your baby breath
Lift this wounded flag
Into your burning nest

Oh, yes, I will
I will

Rose hips lady
Your field is ripe
Bury my torn body
In that rain-soaked night

Tame the roaring tiger
Never lets you rest
Take my last reward 
From your moonlit breasts

Oh, yes, I will
I will

Daddy’s gone hunting 
He’s gone away
Daddy’s gone hunting
Won’t be back for days

Left you with a lover
Makes a shrine 
Of your skin

Left you with a lover
Takes you down
Roads of sin

Left you all alone 
Alone

And the knots cut deep
Through the musk and flesh
Of hot regret
And the love you need
It’s a shadow
Never lets you rest

You release the Beast
From a well that’s wet
You will confess
That the love you need
It’s a shadow
Never lets you rest

Rose hips lady
Aaaaaah......


Details | Terza Rima | |

Deadfall

dults we stand for time has passed us by 
our childish ways have bloomed into a blight
the roots we set, now gnarled, so pained decry, 

the visages of springtime love's delight.
Upon foul winds you've flown, you've left
a thief without the strength to be forthright.

A fallen limb, a rotting bough bereft,
am I to lay alone, as winter comes,
as you bloom again within a riper cleft?

Is this your wish, and how your pledge succumbs? 
Never had I dreamed I'd be so harshly left 
for a younger bloom with naught but dried crumbs.

By sins of the flesh, we've been undone.
I will not forgive what you've become.


Details | Italian Sonnet | |

Exploded Revere

Each and every heart has lost its way
Xanadu is just fictitious, this you know.
Pain flows with love, as the wind doe s blow.
Love can be pretty or just as ugly any day.
One heart beats so different, in every way.
Dear lonely heart, listen to your spirit glow.
Each passing moment will tell the way to row.
Dream your desires, but live in reality today.

Revelations shall take your heart for a little ride.
Explosions build and fall, love has crescendos.
Veer carefully in passions lost, before you decide.
Eventual truth will guide you; out of these woes.
Respect your soul, don’t let your heart be the only guide
Every love shows, grows, though not without repose.


Details | Ballad | |

Fireworks Hill

Let’s go climb
And move back time
To that mysterious hill
Where a boy first met his girl

Long before 
The cynics arrived
Before the laughter died
And God returned the day to night

Where dazzling fireworks
Rained sparkles
On our lives
Two strange birds
Came together
And opened up their eyes

Let’s go climb 
We’ll move back time

Fireworks Hill, Fireworks Hill
Far from my mind
Never forgotten
Fireworks Hill, Fireworks Hill
We became one there
So very often

And there are vivid colors 
Blasting through the sky
Dancing rainbows 
I really want to taste
There is weeping smoke
Painting all the stars
Burning graveyards 
For the human race

Let’s go climb
And move back time
To that mysterious hill
Where a boy first met his girl

We’ll race to the edge
Fulfill our pledge
It was written in blood
The heat of our love

Oh, jump, baby, jump
We’ll fly away together
Jump, baby, jump
Our bodies joined forever

Let’s go climb
And move back time 
To that mysterious hill
Where a boy first met his girl

Fireworks hill, fireworks hill
I see the sparkles in the air
Fireworks hill, fireworks hill
I smell the dazzle of your hair
Fireworks hill, Fireworks hill
We flew to Heaven over there

Let’s go climb
We’ll move back time
(Forever…with you)


Details | Free verse | |

Mutual Spirits

I climb through dense brambles to hide.
Light flickers to find me,
I don’t feel safe here, and run on.

I’m in a dark house and move back and back through the rooms.
I hear him asking someone if they had seen me.
I curl up tighter into my hidden place under old clothes.

I feel him closer.
I don’t see him.
I run again and find a disconnected darkness.

As I cover myself with leaves,
It all begins to fade, 
The darkness, the details, the uneasiness;

I awake, and sit up clearing the cobwebs of the dream out of my sleep.
I reach out for my husband.
He raises to his elbow and touches me.

His sleepy voice says, “Oh good, you’re here — 
I’ve been chasing after you,
And no one would tell me where you were.”


Details | Sonnet | |

Beautiful Lies

Beautiful Lies

One beautiful lie , an unvoiced sonnet
Words veiled with a crime that steals my hearts last beat
Slow turn of your mood shows me disquiet
With kisses warm and vulgar with deceit.

One pulse stills, our love was not the one love,
Just remains of a lukewarm cup of tea.
You steep and brood, one pineing the lost dove.
My broken wing lame, I fall into the sea.

Beautiful lies, my heart begs for your fires
To hear the words forged my way by anvil
Beautiful lies, hope grows dim and expires
Waiting for judgment by divine gavel

Tremble my lips , tears fall dry from my eyes
Protect me from madness, beautiful lies.


Details | I do not know? | |

Untitled (And dripping with sarcasm)

It’s no gain to waste all this pain.

A disgrace to not always hide this face.

My mind is lame, and it’s a shame,

to feel so numb and not be dumb.

I hate to say life’s not always been this way.

It’s an outrage that I ever lived outside this cage.

Apathy works best for me.

Cold-hearted to myself, the cheaply departed.

Sadness makes me the happiest. 

My loneliness makes me feel so blessed.

This bitter resentment fills me with contentment.

My biggest folly ever was delaying this melancholy.

However this ailment is reaching my fulfillment,

Leaving me empty, sad, happy and whole.

My bitterness is such bliss.

A feeling that I would surely miss.

I often lament evading this torment.

This suffering is the greatest thing ever.

I frequently regret never being upset.

Now I daily look forward to the sorrow that’s promised by tomorrow,

and I pray it comes each and everyday.

Without its displeasure I cannot carry on,

for it is my greatest treasure.


Details | Free verse | |

Love's Renewal

You found me.
It was easy for you.
You cut through two time zones 
And miles of red tape without a road map,
Then fell to my front door.
I became an imprint on your brain
From my birth.
You were where you were
And I was where I am now.
You felt me from the beginning
And watched me grow,
Knowing what I looked like
Before you saw my face,
Recognizing my voice 
Before you heard me speak.
Alike in every conceivable way
And opposite in every opposite way,
And all of it right.
I knew.  I knew you were coming.
You knew it too.
You called out my name.  Remember?
All those necessary years gone forever.
You told me who I was,
But there is no going back---
"Don't ever go back," someone said.

Now, you are full of regrets.
Don't be.
I am not.
Very few meet their equal and opposite half.
We did.
You will never find me again.
I will never find you,
But we can both celebrate love.




Details | Haiku | |

Haikus About God: V

Omniscient guy
Yet he lets bad things happen
How can he exist?


Details | Tetractys | |

scattered shards

you left me all alone without a chance to pick up the scattered shards of my heart


Details | Concrete | |

Trip Twist

In the void, sipping the zoid,
with mental properties of tripping on the spiral.
Falling down the tail of lions, awkwardly spinning.
With upside down tunnel vision leaking through.

Solidifying all matter that matters,
melting into the walls of your brain.
It tickles all the raindrops dripping in your eyes,
satisfying your desire of a synchronized pattern.

Bleeding purple from the rainbow,
and turning into swirls of diamonds.
Slipping exuberantly beside you; driving you wild.
Where the shadows stop the spirited scream.

Devour yourself into the omniscient grip. 
Icy cold finger tips scratch the surface of your divinity,
bringing you closer to the God who whispered in your unborn ear,
situated in your flesh from birth to death.

It embeds itself in the pupil of your eye,
dancing with your spirit and licking your soul.
Black shapes of madness wrapped in chaos and euphoria.
Twinkling and blinking dust of a cloud. 

Haze filled skies and blood filled smoke raining from the clouds.
Envisions of clowns and demons laughing at our demise.
Chilling sensations of sickening mannerisms,
mechanisms and mechanics sought out to destroy the tiny creatures.

These creatures running crazy into acceptance of demise.
Deprived of life, scared of death but giving into it's taste.
Taste buds quiver as the taste grows sweeter.
Death, oh death, tell everyone who you really are...

Too long have you been hidden in the shadows you cast, 
too long have we rendered your pain.
The world grows sicker as the hairs in my head grey. 
I'll never surrender as demons always circle.

Today, begins a new day of our fight.
And I have a good feeling about this day. 
Onward, we have united our minds and gathered ourselves within. 
Always ready for we accept our fear. 

We accept our hate and everything in between.
Accept it all for what it really is. 
No amount of doubts will over throw us. 
Onward, to peace.


Details | Lyric | |

Lullaby love

All I hear 
All I see
Is not meant for me
All I want
All I know
Is I cannot let you go

Driving forward
Moving back
Only one thing that I lack
Hope is clinging 
Holding tight
I wish you were here tonight
Dry my eyes
Hide the pain
Overwhelming to contain

For all I hear 
All I see
Is not meant for me
All I want
All I know
Is I cannot let you go


Memories set
Heart is bound
Now all must be drowned
Keep your distance
When so near
No emotions can appear
Burning love
Hidden flame
Love is such an evil game

All I hear 
All I see
Is so perfect for me
All I want
All I know
Is how it’s meant to go


Details | Free verse | |

THIS WHOLE SEX THING


FORGIVE ME THAT I HAVEN'T BEEN THROUGH THIS WHOLE SEX THING,
DON'T KNOW OF THESE ORGIES OR  THE BACUS PARTIES,
DON'T KNOW OF SOME OTHER WOMAN'S CURVES,
OF SOME OTHER SCENT, EITHER STRONG OR WEAK,
DON'T KNOW OF THE WETNESS OF SOME OTHER VAGINA,
NOT ABOUT TWO MEN IN ME,
MORE THAN A SINGLE PENIS TOUCHING MY FEELINGS.
NO, UNFORTUNATELY I DIDN'T HAVE THESE PLEASURES
FROM THE HOOKERS,
WHIPS, ECSTASY,THREESOMES, SWING.
SORRY, I DON'T KNOW THESE BEDS,
WASN'T LUCKY ENOUGHT TO HAVE THAT KIND OF COURAGE.
NEVER GOT BEAT UP WITH A BELT,
NEVER HUNG ON THE CEILING,
NEVER STUFFED ME WITH DRUGS,
NEVER SAW UNREALISTIC IMAGES
NOR SAID ABUSIVE WORDS
WHILE THEY CALLED ME WHORE
OR WHILE THEY SPANKED ME
IN SEARCH OF A MASOQUIST PLEASURE.
POOR ME, NEVER BROKE THE TABOOS
CUMMING IN SOMEONE I BARELY KNOW,
NEVER TASTED DOZENS OF DIFFERENT NUDES,
RAGGED TIMES TEN INSIDE OUT
FOR BEING DRENCHED IN DIFFERENT SPERMS,
HAVING COUPLES BETWEEN MY LEGS
THAT I DON'T EVEN KNOW THE NAMES,
WHERE THEY LIVE, WHAT THEY WEAR OR WHAT THEY EAT.
NEVER PIERCED ME WITH PINS
THEY HAVE NEVER MADE ME A TOY.
NEVER TASTED AN ORGASM
WITH  PUBLIC WATCHING,
NEVER ENDED WITH APPLAUSE,
NEVER TRIPPED ON EXHAUSTED MEN
LYING ON MY LIVING ROOM RUG,
DRUNK FROM ALCOHOL
BURNING FROM ALL THEIR HOLES...

I HAVE JUST WHISPERED " I LOVE YOU" ,
ABSORBED ONE MANS JOY,
DROVE MY NAILS IN JUST ONE BODY,
RIPPED  A FEW SHIRTS,
ANSWERED TO JUST AN UNIQUE TOUCH.
I HAVE ONLY MEMORIZED HIS SIGNALS,
HIS SCARS
AND I HAVE ONLY KNOWN HIS CARNIVALS,
HIS FAULTS,
HIS MOANS AND HIS MANY GROANS.
WHAT A SHAME THAT I HAVE BEEN A GEISHA
FOR ONLY ONE MANS DESIRE
AND ONE IRRESISTIBLE "LET ME...".
BACK, SIDE, FRONT
ABOVE, BELOW, IN BETWEEN
I HAVE BEEN WHAT HE WANTED ME TO BE;
DAME, PROSTITUTE, ANIMAL, HUMAN
LADY, CRETIN, FATAL AND SWEET
BUT ALWAYS HIS,
NAKED ONLY IN FRONT OF HIM...

BUT NOW, WHAT WILL WE DO?
I STILL CAN LEARN ABOUT SEX
BUT WHO COULD TEACH HIM  LOVE?

PATRICIA EVANS


Details | Ballad | |

Antigone

I am the face of misery
My life, a dissonance of autumn and spring,
The years are written in the same
Lugubrious, nostalgic grey
How can it be the author to blame?
I cannot scream this all away…
Burn nor Bleed this all away…
To Death I am Ordained

Lacuna ever growing
With Velvet sheets of life flowing
Aeons apart of my "royalty"
Under the mask the cannot see...
Can you dispel this tragedy:
Antigone - Epiphany failing

If it must be…
Then just kill me,
(Antigone) sing me out of reality;
I wear this dissonant crown of shame
(Antigone) Of a kingdom's disdain
I hate to be this way... normalcy's bane
(Antigone) Here comes the edict, to blame
The sordid child of Thebes,
This is me,
Antigone

No words of hope
No words of hate
Do I have Lenore to send to me:
The sordid child of Thebes
Caught In the longest nightmare
life - the slowest way to die

I know this is my life 
But I'm not under control
under the mask the will see
Just Another Human

If it must be…
Then just kill me,
(Antigone) sing me out of reality;
I wear this dissonant crown of shame
(Antigone) Of a kingdom's disdain
I hate to be this way... normalcy's bane
(Antigone) Here comes the edict, to blame
The sordid child of Thebes,
This is me,
Antigone

If it must be…
Then just kill me,
(Antigone) sing me out of reality;
I wear this dissonant crown of shame
(Antigone) Of a kingdom's disdain
I hate to be this way... normalcy's bane
(Antigone) Here comes the edict, to blame
The sordid child of Thebes,
This is me,
Antigone

Can you dispel my life; this tragedy?
Can you control the storm in my mind?
I'm asking you: can you rid me
Of The Curse of Antigone?


Details | Free verse | |

My Mortal Wound

Traitor thoughts return 
  again and again 
  to the blackened pool 
  that has become breeding ground 
  for my memories of you. 

Like fingertips to a deep gash 
  testing for tenderness, 
  waiting for healing, 
  impatiently scratching at scabs and scars.  

Loosing angry blood 
  from freshly clawed skin;
  pricking nettles of pain 
  into my defeated heart. 

Ripe with infection; never to heal 
  you have become 
  ...my mortal wound.


Details | Rhyme | |

Hostage in the Bedroom

There’s a gun upon my bed
Not the kind made of metal
A vivid tattoo color
Above my lover’s
Secret devil

And that gun is like a demon
Aimed toward her pleasure zone
Urging hunters to take a shot
And take the trophy 
Home

I see blood upon the doorstep
I smell murder in her fold
I  fear ghosts will haunt her body
In the bullets I have sown

I hear hungry infants crying
The ones she gave away
And the bastards she is hiding
Are my regrets from yesterday

I feel the gun blazing
As she sucks my breath away
I’m a hostage to her body
In the mayhem
She  purveys

In the middle of the night 
I’ll make my escape
Run, run, run 
Run away

I’ve got to run

In the middle of the night
When her back is turned
Run, run, run
Run away

I’ve got to run

There’s a gun upon my bed
It belongs to my baby
Burned deep inside her
On a night she went 
Crazy

And every time I think
I’ll flee 
Her dangerous painted gun
She draws it against me
And I feel myself succumb

I see blood upon the doorstep
I smell murder in her fold
I  fear  ghosts will haunt her body
In the bullets I have sown

I hear hungry infants crying
The ones she gave away
And the bastards she is hiding
Are my regrets from yesterday

Save me from her gun
She’ll never let me go
Save me from drowning
In her young and wanton soul

I’ve got to run
But there’s a gun

My baby won’t let me go.






Details | Rhyme | |

Walking away from someone you Love

Walking away from someone you love Trotting the path of friend if I had to do it all over I’m certain I’d do it again Walking away from someone you love not something I wanted to do but something I knew I must my hearts still in love but it’s my mind I had to trust Walking away from someone you love the memories…laughter… and tears letting these things go is what I most feared oh, how I pray my heart will heal Walking away from someone you love looking forward to a future unsure of what will be there I opened the door of uncertainty stepped onto roads unclear my destination’s still unknown only hope to land in love and care Lay


Details | Rhyme | |

REAR RUB

There comes a time when we all begin 
  to challenge the authority above.
Whilst we may know that we committed a sin
  they still discipline us because of their love.

I remember just such a time
  when Mom was the challengee and I was the challenger.
It was freezing and to be outside was a crime
   yet, when she wasn't looking, I secreted myself out the door.

Of course the S_ _ _  hit the fan
  as she saw me bundled up out there.
Window raised she called out, "DAN!"
  enough to give me a scare.

In those days the timeout was nonexistent
  and the corporal would be felt.
But the length and means of its extent
  I would only know as she wielded that belt.

Like a windmill turning in great arcs afield
  my little frame seemed to go.
Trying to get away from that swatting wield
  was all I wanted to know!

"YES, MOTHER!  YES, MOTHER!  YES, MOTHER!"
  was all that I could say.
Hoping against hope that she wouldn't tell father
  when he came home at the end of his day.

This is one of the darkest memories
  that I've had since I was about four.
Sometimes I think about those strokes that stung like bees
  because I had sneaked out that door.

Yet, it was a mother's love for me
  that prompted her disciple so severe.
As I have grown older the why I could see...
  and sometimes still rub my rear!


Details | Sonnet | |

On A Summer's Aftermoon

       ON A SUMMERS AFTERNOON
Come sit a spell--we'll take a little time--
from out of life, forgetting what we know;
and talk upon some things I guess that I'm
much closer to--than things life's had to show.

Do you know love? It's funny how it goes
to almost anyone, who needs it not,
but be there need--and love--it never shows
like finer things of life, to those who've got!

Now does that seem to be a fitting thing
to talk about, as passing time away?
Or would you choose what weather has to bring
as here we sit--with nothing more to say?

I guess your life's been blessed--and filled with love
or you'd know what my heart is speaking of.
© ron wilson aka vee bdosa the doylestown poet


Details | Free verse | |

Look At Yourself

You love this man you claim, But still you flirt with others
On your hand you tattooed his name, Said I love you and
Caused so much pain

Getting drunk to feel alive,Solely but slowly your dying inside
Talk is cheap you say, Actions are what's real
The cards are on the table and it's time for you to deal

I tried to help you , All I could
And understanding, I thought you would
My trusting you would be, A great mistake indeed

Weak I know you're not, But selfish is what you are
I'm not trying to be rude, Or hurt you in any way
I just want you to get a clue and to live another day

You choose to live, Or you choose to die
It's not up to me, Not anymore
I gave you the options but the choices are yours
I'm looking at you, And all I can see
Is a frightened little girl, As fragile as can be

You ruined your life, When you began to drink
You hurt your children, Why didn't you think?
With alcohol and drugs , There's no way out
You'll always scream and shout about
You against the world, That is how you see
And all your loyal friends became enemies

You can't tell the day, You can't tell the time
All you can tell is what color of wine-
It is that you're drinking
You've lost all touch with reality...


Details | Ballad | |

WHY

Why did God create a life
That wasn’t meant to be
Why did He give eyes
If they were never meant to see
Why did He put breath in you
Then take that breath away
Why give you to me
If you were never meant to stay
Why show someone happiness
And how it feels to smile
And fill their hearts with hope
If it can only last a while
Why did God create the sun
When all it does is rain
How am I supposed to laugh
When all I feel is pain
Why let people dream
Knowing their dreams will not come true
Why should I find someone else
When all I want is you
Why say there’s a Heaven
When it doesn’t help to pray
Why is there tomorrow
When I long for yesterday
What’s the point in searching
Knowing you’re not there to find
Why give someone life
If death is following behind
So why God when He took my love
Did He not take me too
For life is not worth living
If it means I don’t have you...


By Raina Hutchins, from the UK


Details | Ballad | |

Please Give Him Back To Me

I just don’t want to be alone
I don’t want to be free
I cannot be without you
But all that’s left is me
I lie here in the darkness
I scream, I shout, I cry
But no one seems to hear me
As I pray, I pray to die
There is no daylight in my world
No sun, no moon, no glow
No smiles or laughter; only tears
Just tears, sad tears that flow
I put my hands together 
I pray to God above
To take me from this lonely place 
And to the man I love
But in the deafening silence
I know I face defeat
I know I'm still alone, because
My broken heart still beats
He took you from my loving arms
And walked you through His door
You belong to Him now
You belong to me no more
I know I live on borrowed time
I know it won’t be long
Before I'm in your arms again
The place where I belong
And I will keep on praying
Until he hears my plea
To take me through the gates of Heaven 
And give you back to me...


Details | Rhyme | |

I Know Of Someone Holding Unforgiveness


I Know of Someone Holding Unforgiveness! I know of someone holding unforgiveness! This has led to a life of much bitterness! Toward his brother, he’s held on to a grudge. From his viewpoint, he won’t even “budge.” No matter what God’s word has clearly spoken… He’s walked with a heart that’s been broken! His son prayed that God would speak to him! That he would forgive, so God could heal him! Forgiveness is a powerful thing to do! If you want God’s mercy to flow through you! We’re not called to “hold back,” the love God’s given! Through Christ shed blood… We’re all forgiven! May the love of Christ come and touch us! It’s no secret how much God really loves us! Please come Lord Jesus! And touch our soul! May we express your love, wherever we go! May God’s gentle love, be what always binds us! HIS words; “love one another,” do remind us! By Jim Pemberton


Details | Dramatic monologue | |

Confused

Confused

If there were thing's I couldn't understand,you was one of them.
Going back and forth with one another,like the wind and does in the howls 
of winter.You'd follow me to escape your own reality,only not knowing your shattering mine.You tell me to be me there was a time when I was me and you couldn't stand it like it was looking into the eye's of a demon.How should I respond? Running away only brings more then I can offer.
Now I'm drifting and everything left me,I'll suffer the venom of past and the reoccurring pains.
From the tell's of literature to the mounts of the great wars have I been able to tell just from their looks what they thought that very moment but as I look into your eye's does it not only confuse me it refuses to tell me the truth,why am I looking into my own eyes?
Let me touch your face.Let me look into your eye's.Let me see the truth which is clouded and locked away.Let me see your feelings fall from your eye's.
Burned. Chain. Shackled. Scared. Tortured. Entangled with lies.and yet harbors no hate toward anyone then yourself.How much do you loathe yourself? To the point your a sacrificial  offering of your own whim's?
As I search for the truth,I see the many heartbreaks and the lies been told to help but nothing prevails. Yet you look at me looking for the same thing.
We're both confused? We're both in agony? We're the same? 
This isn't right.This is a lie.I don't wish to see anymore.
I won't lose to this,nor bow down and be your toy.Yet when I'm close to you,it never cold.
Hold my hand as I fight with myself. Never mind hold me closer until neither of us is cold.Don't lie to me with those pleading eye's,that are like dark's as coal and beautiful as an onyx.
Let's be ourselves.Let's shut ourselves away from this world.Let's search for our own truth.But if there only fear in your mouth,then there's lies.I shall grab your heart and I will hold it like it was the last gem on earth.So scream,hate,and be gently.
I'm confused.Your confused.I will listen,if you will talk.
Have you ever heard these words before? I never have but I will say them to you,you who has the same pleading eye's as me.When we're so much alike yet so different to the point it confusing.


Details | Free verse | |

Give Me Back My Shirt

You stole my shirt again
The one with stains
Beneath my armpits

You lied and said 
The shirt somehow fell 
Into your suitcase

A dark black shadow 
That hurled itself off a cliff
And landed inside your
Sad blonde soul

And when you sleep alone at night
In the naked stretch of your wine-soaked skin

Do you smell my harsh manly aroma
In the pillow of your theft?

Do you wet yourself in the taste of 
The baby felons we might make?

Do you imagine yourself wearing 
My body
Upon the sharp thrusts of my 
Contempt
And
Love?

For a liar, a thief, a fetishist for 
Fabric
That revives memories 
Of lust long faded

You stole my shirt again
The one  that has faint traces
Of your drool, in the way you 
Drip yourself upon me 
In the hot slumber of your 
Babbling incoherent dreams

Give me back my shirt
It was a present from my sister
Who rarely bought me anything
Except for a blue cotton candy 
Vivid blue
Like your icy sullen eyes 
In the childhood 
Of my lonely
Indelible 
Lament


Details | Couplet | |

Unknown

Who am I?
Am I defined by what is near in sight?
Am I defined by what I have done,
Or am I defined by what I could become?

Perhaps I'm of no use.
To him, or her, or I, nor you.
Or perhaps I'm too misunderstood to be defined,
And it is something like understanding that comes in time.

And if to the world I'm never shown,
Yet in my own light I've grown and grown,
And so I can know no happiness but my own--
The reason for my smile, to you, will forever be unknown.

I do not pray for the world to know my name.
For it and verse; the letters are the same.
And if a man should find his sorrow in what he reads,
I pray his pain my words to keep. 

Should his eyes rain on my page,
Better tears than storms of rage.
And if a man should find his sorrow in what he reads.
I pray his pain my words to keep.

And if to the world you're never shown,
Yet in your own light you've grown and grown,
And so you know no happiness but your own.
Let the reason for your smile, to you, only be known.


Details | Romanticism | |

When I Look Into Her Eyes

Every time I'm feeling down, or feeling so blue
As if there's nothing I can do
My spirits always seem to rise
When I Look Into Her Eyes

I'm new at this, this game of love, but got no shame
Get excited when she calls my name
We're trying on love for the very first time
When I Look Into Her Eyes

Their beauty takes me to the depths of forever
Where we are so happy, and together
Oh how I'd love to just hold her tight, and never let go
Into Her Eyes, oh how they glow

Comforting and loving with passion to spare
Those two heavens with my world, I ache to share
I'm trying on a first love, a first love for size
When I Look Into Her Eyes

The fires of my love they're igniting 
And to our future her eyes are exciting
There's rose gardens and sunny skies
When I Look Into Her Eyes

Their love, with desire is burning
She's got my world upside down, and turning
Oh how the world stops, yet the time somehow flies
When I Look Into Her Eyes

But when I think about what will happen
I realize Into Her Eyes, how deep I am trapped in
Soon I will have to kiss her softly with the goodbyes
How long will I live without their beauty, how will I survive?


Details | Quatrain | |

A Mother's Son......For Dustin Cunningham

A smile that warms her heart.
 With bright, shining Angel eyes.
Soon his whole world would fall apart.
 When he sadly watched as his Mother dies.

No one to listen or believe what he saw.
 For years the truth lie in wait.
Each passing day, the pain made him raw.
 And for his step-dad rose a new level of hate.

A troubled youth is what he'd come to be.
 Violence, drugs and alcohol to deal with the pain.
When the truth came out it didn't set him free.
 Watching for Santa as his Mother was slain.

After years, Justice was served for his Mother's death.
 But her kids would have no justice at all.
They would never hold her again so they remained bereft.
 She'll never be there for them to hug, kiss or call.

She loved her kids, especially her eldest son.
 She was taken too soon by a drunk, selfish bully.
He didn't care who he hurt or what he did to anyone.
 Its not something her children could understand fully.

Her son now sits in his own personal Hell.
 Taken away from society to pay for his unrelated crimes.
So now he stays in that six by six prison cell.
 Hoping that he'll heal in a matter of time.

I'm here for him and I remain his friend.
 I wait for that shine to return to his now haunted eyes.
For that smile to brighten from his sad, dull grin.
 I'm someone who can love him and quiet his cries.


Details | I do not know? | |

Too late

The night would steal his love away 
across the bridge of the moon. 
He knew that it might try one day, 
But it has come that bit too soon. 

It cut itself a creature, 
From its own satanic cloth, 
And a rider plucked from Hades 
Did bestride this behemoth. 

Oh hear the sound 
Of pounded ground 
Beneath its fissured hooves! 

See the craven ravens 
Seeking highest high-up havens! 
And the dizzy weak-kneed witches 
Hiding timidly in ditches. 

The bats, the rats, 
The mice, the owls, 
The creatures that slink through the night; 
The foxes and stoats 
And blubbering toads, 
My, how he puts them to flight! 

Evil will fear greater evil, 
more than it fears good; 
And even the daemons and dusky elves 
Risk refuge under the Church’s rood. 

Oh hear the churning of crumbling earth, 
The turning helpless ravaged turf, 
The creaking croaking breaking trees, 
The rivers sprinting to the sea, 
The children crying, 
The weakened dying, 
And the distant hiss of burning hope. 

My prince, my prince, wake up, wake up! 
The gate is opened, the drawbridge down! 
Where is your armour, where your sword? 
The lady will give you just reward! 

The night has stolen his love away 
across the bridge of the moon. 
He knew that it might try one day, 
But it came that bit too soon. 

 


Details | Lyric | |

Tropical Getaway

Carpooling in the Monday traffic jam,             
Wondering what we are and who I am.
Since we’ve already raised a family,              
Is there anything left just for you and me?
Seems each day is just like the one before.           
Exactly what have we both been working for?
So many years lost from nine to five...              
Making ends meet, but barely feeling alive.

I wanna find us some tropical getaway--        
Somewhere lost where the locals play;
With fishing boats and mango trees,                 
And spicy scents carried on the breeze.
I wanna find us some island Shangri-La—      
A quiet spot with no hoopla...
Some place where it’s easy to hide,                   
That can’t be found in a tourist guide. 

I wanna find us some tropical paradise             
Where nights are warm and folks are nice,
And green birds sing exotic melodies                
While monkeys play high in coconut trees 
We could lounge in that tropical paradise,         
As bonfires spark like fireflies;
Watch lovers dance while steel drums play        
Calypso tunes from dusk till day. 

I wanna hold you close on an empty beach,
With a full moon just out of reach.
We could sneak behind a big sand dune
And celebrate another honeymoon.
Let’s forget about all the noisy mobs,               
Grown-up kids, and annoying jobs,
And swing in a hammock made for two—         
And snuggle close,  just me and you. 

(Chorus) 
Bamboo torches and starry skies       
Will be mirrored in your big brown eyes.
We’ll dance away each endless night,              
Lost in love, with no dawn in sight. 


Details | Ballad | |

Little Black Horse

little black horse, I've seen you around
little black horse, destined to terrorize the town
little black horse, you've seemed to have caught a mare
little black horse, with your long shiny hair

little black horse, why drag that mare around
death so coupled to you that she's destined to drown
fate cruel to her, to make her love
her soul tarnished and beaten, no longer white, and as pure as a dove

little black horse, do you not care at all?
crest fallen and withering, she still heeds your call
little black horse, she will die at your hand
yet her presence to you, just a mere grain of sand 


Details | Narrative | |

my 3rd favourite drive

My 3rd favourite drive was to see her
Only for it to be the longest drive home
To be once again in her arms and embrace her too
I knew what was coming 
I never wanted to let her go
Stability is so fragile 
Stability breaks with a word
Her mind state is a dark world
All alone she decided I'm not to follow
I could see she wanted to cry
Inside we both had many times

To be not good for a person
Is impossible when even in this outcome
Her presence makes me smile naturally
The talk of the future
The talk of ifs and maybes
Doesn't matter to me
I know what I have now
I know how to be happy again
Can you not see?
My life is with you
No matter what I choose
No matter what it is you do
My dream is to be make you happy too

Sitting in my car returning the way I came 
Over an hour to drive home
Easily felt like it was over two
The cd player in my car was purposely loud
Covering the sound from my phone
To my right an accident had occurred
Firemen and ambulances calming the situation
Shards of metal and glass strewn on the road
To my shock I felt nothing for the devastation
My only aim was to get back home

My 3rd favourite drive was to see her
Only for it to be the longest drive home


Details | Epigram | |

Absence Makes the Heart ---

Your absence hurts me,
Like a persistent toothache
Or a pair of too-tight shoes.....
But, worse, your hard face,
When finally we meet,
Leaves me panicked, gasping --
A doomed and thrashing swimmer
Drowning in your indifference.


Details | Free verse | |

Only in You

Through the lonely woods, I may head,

Upon the autumn leaves, I may tread,

At the secluded horizon, I may stare,

And only you, I may see,

In those symphonies of silence,

In those melodies of calmness,

In those euphonies of quietness.

 

By the silent lake, I may lay,

Till the twilight fades, I may stay,

Then in reclusive silence, I may walk,

And only to you, I may talk,

Through those toungueless emotions,

Through those wordless attachments,

Through those voiceless sentiments.

 

In the lone meadow, I may wander,

Along the untrodden paths, I may waver,

In companionless seclusion, I may hide,

And only in you, I may find,

The depths of oneness,

The bonds of togetherness,

The cozy feel of coalescence.

 

In the wilderness of emotions, I may die,

At the merciless daggering, I may sigh,

Through a million wounds, I may bleed,

And only in you, I may seek,

The balm of love,

The warmth of affection,

The heal of inseparability.


Details | Ballad | |

Voice in the Night

How do I thank
The voice in the night?
Call of hope
After the world turned dark

How do I thank
The voice in the night?
Healing words
Made from
Angel heart

Oh, her chocolate whisper
Warm convincing breeze
Oh, her breathy laughter
In the shadow of my need 

Don’t you hear the voice?
Save  you from despair
Don’t you hear the voice?
Sent by ghosts who care

Don’t you hear the voice?
Rises like a prayer
Come to rescue you
From your earthly snare

How do I thank
The voice in the night?
Call of hope 
Kissed my tears away

How do I thank
The voice in the night?
Now I dance
To a magic serenade

Don’t you hear the voice?
Memories of home
Don’t you hear the voice?
Pretty as a poem

Don’t you hear the voice?
Vivifies your soul
Bathes you in a pool 
Love you’ve never known

How do I thank
The voice in the night?
Call of hope
After the world turned dark

Voice inside the darkness
Gets into my head
Lady caller,
Take me, take me
To your bed

Voice inside the darkness
Gets into my head
Lady caller
Raise me, raise me
From the dead

Voice inside the darkness
Gets into my head


Details | Couplet | |

Why do I Love You, You Hate Everything You've Become

There’s are ghosts in your head that just won’t die
While there’s a liar in your eyes on whom I can’t rely
And there’s a method to your madness, but no one knows
That something’s not right until its ugly face shows
Because the ghosts just keep screaming, too loud for you to hear
That when you thought I was gone, I’d always stayed right here
And though the liar tried to trick me, saying words you’d naught believe
So that I took on all your monsters when all I needed was a reprieve
But soon you tasted my blood to find that you liked the taste
Longing, wanting more, so you laid me waste
Though I begged and I pleaded for you my dear
You only heard and saw ghosts never really there.
And when you saw your blood, it proved the last straw
That horrible scream that unhinged your jaw,
I knew never again could I come to call you mine
As foolish a faith as that of a Divine.
For you, there was only the ghosts inside your head
Haunting your eyes and the liar with all his words yet said.


Details | Senryu | |

a three second pause

a three second pause
I wish I hadn’t noticed
before “I love you”



Details | Pantoum | |

Only Link A Telephone Line

The wait_only link a telephone line
Minutes trickle through the minute glass
Everyone gets a call and that is fine
Our daughter answered phone as her own task

Minutes trickle through the minute glass
Finally the phone call from Doctor Burke
Our daughter answered phone as her own task
His job was done; he did excellent work

Finally the phone call from Doctor Burke
Surgery finished, it went well_ hip in
His job was done; he did excellent work
Wait again while in recovery_wear thin

Surgery finished, it went well_ hip in
He's in recovery will be there short while
Wait again while in recovery_wear thin
My anxiety went past quarter mile

He's in recovery will be there short while
Everyone gets a call and that is fine
My anxiety went past quarter mile
The wait_only link a telephone line


Details | Quatrain | |

YESTERDAY'S JOYS

I thought about you today
If I saw you what I'd say
How'd things be right now
If I had never walked away

Would you take me back
If I came walking in the door
If I asked can we be friends
Would you long for so much more

If I confessed I was wrong
Would you let me off the hook
If I said I only sing our song
Would you give me another look

See, I was the fool, not you
No good as one, I needed two
Without a Lyric, the music's blue
Happy times have been so few

Has time now stolen my rhyme
I beat.. but where's the drum
I was ice cold chilled out cool
Had the cake now I'd take a crumb

I thought about you today
If I saw you what I'd say
How'd things be right now
If I had never walked away

Contest: Isaiah's "Pick A Title"
Date: 10-8-14


Details | Rhyme | |

Regret

Regret

Regrets I have so many
But one that drags me down
Every time I think about it
My face takes on a frown.

It was the day I left my wife
Though why I do not know
All I know with certainty
Is that I hurt that lady so

I never will forgive myself
The remorse is hard to bear
And everywhere I try to go
The furies, they are there.

I know until my dying day
I never will forget
The day I left my wife behind
It fills me with regret.

8 August 2013 @ 1720hrs.




Details | Free verse | |

Duck Side Story

You have your North side ducks, 
And you have your south side ducks.
Neither the twain shall meet.
For each one had his nose in the air. 
They simply would not do the greet.

So as it happens they would dance with flair in the middle of the pond.
Always trying to out do the other side…Yes, let’s call it ‘Stomp The Pond’
Wings in motion lifting them up, to stomp the waters with their feet
Acrobatics and splashing around… Man it looked so neat.

So Stella, one of the South Side Ducks fell in love with her North side Pete.
But she couldn’t cross the middle of the pond, with so much action in the way.
Fussing, blustering, and carryings on were the name of the day.

But you know, there’s always one strange duck, and that’s the one who built a bridge.
Now all the others could come across or watch the stomp from the middle of the id.
My moral, I say to you young ones… is as appealing as stomping can be…
The world works better when brought together… 
By the builders of a bridge.


Details | Carpe Diem | |

Questioning Life

Forget! Regret not, for it all has intention...
To attempt comprehension leads to double block wall.
In searching your question, much more loss is gotten, 
Confusion, dismay a deeper dug hole.
Infinitely seeking you strive for some meaning, 
the truth is quite simple you are not sole at all! 
Infusion connection the union eternal, 
Is easy to grasp when knowledge of whole,
is truly encountered from deep within query
The meaning the truth the love of it all...
Once trouble & strife and struggle are missing,
The clear light of being shows beauty once more.
Accept what is given agree to the treaty.
Fight not with your fears, and answer your call.
Find substance in living, step over delusions. 
Regardless of meaning, life’s radiance will soar.
So use this awareness these words and this practice,
Come forth tall and sturdy, head high and recall..
When sad and when empty in need of intention,
No doubts I plead! No need to explore!
Emotions you hold are sensed by your siblings,   
Your waves of sensation your truth and your soul... 
Are parts of us all, we are all together we are all but one!
In oneness we’re whole! 


Details | Free verse | |

Never Enough

I always love more,
and it kills me in the end.
I always give more than I receive
and,
even though I cherish each smile like it alone
was responsible for moving the world,
it was never enough 
and I was never enough,
but we both knew the teams weren't quite even
and each was playing by a different set of rules.
So I gave you all I had and
took out a loan to give you more-
leaving my heart hungry so I could make sure
there was always enough to fill yours-
and you gave me what you had 
and I cherished each glance like it kept the oceans churning.
I pawned my soul and shed my skin-
leaving my bones cold and aching-
so yours would never feel hollow.
And I gave you everything I had
and loved you with all my strength
until my heart gave out-
and yet I still managed a few more beats
for good measure-
And you gave me what you could but
it wasn't enough
and still I cherished each ounce of your love
like it was the last breath ghosting across my lips
in one final offering to you-
"I love you."


Details | Rhyme | |

Constanza

I don’t need the flowers, vases
Sure they’re pretty on the table 
But they’re proof we live a fable 

Trips to warm, exotic places
Could bring the love that we let go 
Back to us; we can take it slow

All I want are your embraces
Let’s try a few, to remember
Where we were, just last September

I know you’ve been other places -
I’m asking you to give them up
A year’s gone by, a year too much

With them around, I am faceless
Please try to see me, here, instead
Rekindle this love; leave their beds




I don’t need the flowers, vases
Trips to warm, exotic places
All I want are your embraces
I know you’ve been other places -
With them around, I am faceless

8/31/12


Details | Lyric | |

Miles

I write
my late night revelations
paint an image so clear-
so precise-
as if fine-tuned with a microscope.
I see the truth.
I now realize that what I need-
I want-
is YOU.
I don't know how I am going to make you see,
make you feel...
I need to make you know.
A simple touch is all I need
to delve into your mind and infect you.
But how to reach you?
You are hidden far away
within your own mind,
in maze of your own design.
Between us locked doors and endless traps,
mountains,
valleys,
rivers, lakes, oceans,
miles and miles of 
impassible terrain that keeps me apart,
keeps me from you!
We are two universes set to collide-
not to be destroyed,
but merge into one.
Set to collide, but keep missing our mark.
This is unbeknownst to you.
I keep the secrets within me.
How much longer can I wait-
how much longer until my silence
consumes me?
Until you break me?
I am deserted, alone,
left in desolation.
You are the answer to the questions,
the key to my freedom.
But you cannot reach me.
And you do not know what you are.
How much longer til my time runs out?


Details | Free verse | |

The Devil Walks

The devil walks 
gets tired
and sits,
and while the devil sits
the devil picks up a tired fruit
rotting, and with jagged nails he peals
slowly, the tender fruit bruising
and he tastes it, smacking his dried lips
and the devil eats
decayed fruit and sour wine	                 nothing lush and sating
then the devil rests
and resumes his walk,
and later the devil sits again
rubs his feat
and goes to bed
and in the morning
he breaks his fast on curses and lies           nothing so filling as figs and nuts
and begin the devil’s walk again,

his walk
on the road our thoughts paved
where all that grows is bad and unwell
to the cross our words built
where flames dance and all is unwell
and he is condemned
upon christening
upon the hearing of his name
and the wobbling of his first steps
to walk a road less traveled,
to be the leader
of our very own crusade
armed with words
against himself
to see him burn,

our crusade of one
and many
on roads first paved upon his birth
to bring the devil down.

The devil walks
The devil eats
and pelted by our stones
He does but sleep
For what we sow
The devil reaps

and there is justice in punishment
there is reward in reckoning
there is bitterness in my mouth
as I say these words
and pity
              the devil
his due.


Details | Rhyme | |

I Thought It Was You

I thought I heard you calling my name,
but it was only the wind or perhaps the rain.
I look over at your picture in the frame.
The steady pitter-patter is driving me insane.

I thought I heard you laughing as I walked by the bedroom door.
Your perfume that lingers in the hallway is hard to ignore.
I would have sworn I heard footsteps creak across the floor;
Maybe it was the waves from the ocean crashing along the rocky shore.

I thought I heard you singing, but could not find you anywhere.
It must be the sound of some nearby wind chimes whistling in the Autumn air.
My heart gets to racing and it's quite a scare,
When I find long strands of your long black hair!

I thought I saw the sparkle in your amazing eyes.
But it was only the stars that brighten the cloudless night.
I find myself watching the sunrise,
and I still imagine you holding me tight

I thought I felt you kiss me with your soft lips.
I thought I ran my hand along the curve of your hips.
But it was only the silk covered pillow cases on our bed.
I awake to realize your memory still burns in my head!!


Details | Haiku | |

Haikus About God: III

Beauty of nature
Why condense it down to God?
Isn’t life enough?


Details | Acrostic | |

Daniel

Drunkenly we fall once more
And wake up weaker than before,
Not dense enough to question this,
I simply savour every kiss,
Evidently, in my bed
Lies nothing more than just a friend.


Details | Rhyme | |

Murderous Thoughts of a Woman Scorned

Cheated on her three times, said it was her reluctance to marry Each time she took him back, finally on her finger his ring she’d carry But even as she wore it, her fickle lover cheated again She threw the chintzy ring at him -- cheap zirconium Knowing he had a gun in his car, stealthily she had to act Purchased a container filled with gas, a lighter in her pocket packed Drove to his neighborhood, parked down the street in a wooded lot Saw them making love through the window, her stomach tied in a knot Suddenly it occurred to her that her own life would be jeopardized Knowing she would be denied heaven, her fear was energized She threw the oil can away, made haste to a nearby church Praying aloud, she asked for guidance as on the pew she perched Contrite as always, seeking sympathy, next day he appeared at her door But instead of a man she saw a beast, in flames his soul would rest evermore Justice has a way of coming about; her murderous thoughts had vanished But from her life this pathetic loser would forever be banished
*Entry for Susan’s “Getting Away with Murder/Murderous Thoughts” By Carolyn Devonshire, October 4, 2011


Details | Free verse | |

Hidden Treasure

Hidden Treasure
Hidden, locked away
A last resort
A compromise
When your well has gone dry
You search endlessly for me
Certain that my presence 
Always awaits your lonely soul
Underneath your dreamscape 
Here I remain
Your reality
I will be your mirror
When delusions are before you
For you I bear this cross
Because my heart beats for you

Just a memory to you so often
Your buried treasure lies here
Waiting to be discovered


 

©  2008 Courtney Dyer


Details | Alliteration | |

Wasteland of Shame

Bound by blame, broken by blight,
Scarred by a stolen satire,
nuzzling necrophiliacs within the night.

Tangled in torment, tied untamed,
blemished by the blasphemy,
of never speaking your name.

Shackled in sin, shredded sovereignty,
dealing death’s doses,
murdering you and me.

Cuffed with candor, calling our crimes,
to an impetuous enslavement,
tortured through time.

Set me free, to flee this fool’s game,
where we're always left wandering,
in this wasteland of shame.


Details | Free verse | |

My 3AM Wake Up Call

You’re a 3AM
Wake up call
With another sob story
About the latest boy 
Who pumped you
Then dumped you
And left you 
In a sweaty lonely pile
Upon another 
Empty bed

And you cry 
Baby girl tears 
All over my phone
And you wonder why handsome
Boys
With shining white  teeth
With full heads of curly black hair
With six-pack stomachs
And  tight muscular
Rear ends 
Can not be more like 
Mature 
Older 
Men

“Just like you,” 
Baby girl says
“Just like you.”

And you cry 
Baby girl tears 
All over my phone
And you wonder why reckless
Boys
Who party all night
Who down countless vodka shots
Who shout “muthafukka,” “dude,” "beotch,"
And other raucous
Victory chants
Can not be more like
Mature 
Older 
Men

“Just like you,” 
Baby girl says
“Just like you.”

You want me to empathize
You want me to criticize
The nasty boys 
Who took you for another 
Cruel and pointless ride

You want me to father you 
In a way he never did

But I’m sorry
Baby girl
I’m sorry

I can’t

Because I admire and envy those 
Boys
In the prime of their life
Not yet defeated
Not yet haunted
Not yet beaten 
By the disappointments that
Await

They are a national treasure
A precious resource

From the exuberant crude shouts of
Irrational wild boys
Come the builders of shelter
The providers of sustenance
The conquerors of enemies
The explorers of frontiers

From the exuberant crude shouts of
Irrational boys
Come the daring adventurers
The first one into the burning house
The last one out of the burning house
The one still standing when everybody else
Fled

From the insatiable loins of such
Irrational wild boys
Come the fierce wild girls
Who dance insanely upon tables
Who run naked through the streets
Who make love without limits
In open fields
Upon damp grass
All through the night

From the insatiable loins  of such
Irrational wild boys
Come the fierce wild girls
Who cat-fight for their lover
Who kill for their children
Who wail passionately for their dead

From such boys
Baby girl
From such boys

You were born into the world

My crazy baby girl
You were born into the world
Like father, like daughter

And if I could be that young wild boy 
Again
The one that you hate
And love
In such a maniacal way

It would be an honor to be with you

An honor to hold you
An honor to love you

Until my dying day.


Details | Ghazal | |

Forlorn

 
To suffer from the heart’s demise, forlorn.
the truth sheds light on layers of lies, forlorn.  

I listen each day for the sparrow’s song,
yet winter brings the raven’s cries, forlorn.

Lord nigh, I seek hope only you can bring.
Distant smiles disclose my own disguise, forlorn. 

My angel descends unto the early hours. 
Upon her silken gowns, I close my eyes, forlorn.

When oh when will I trust to love again? 
To think I became all I despise, forlorn.
 


Details | Ballade | |

Sad girl rising


Sad girl rising

Let me tell you about this girl I know
My cousin, this girl be
Her life has been so very sad
But how wonderful is she
She was a wild child, till she married
And had her first born child
When she found out that his brain was damaged
It really drove her wild.

She took the Doctor through the courts
Then fought for ten long years
To get the money she deserved
And she cried so many tears
She gained a million pound at last
To help her with the lad
And yet the damage it was done
And it really drove her mad.

Her and her hubby cared for he
And gave their lives to him
It was a twenty four, seven job
But at times it got real grim
She would do just anything
To make his life more sweet
But when she got that Parkinson’s
She was close on to defeat

But no, she struggled with the odds
And though it’s ten years on
Never does this girl give up
When all her hope seems gone
She smiles, and carries on with courage
Like I’ve never seen before
She’s something kind of wonderful
She’s a hero, that’s for sure.

30 July 2o13 @ 1043hrs.


Details | Ballade | |

She worries so much

She worry’s so much

She worries in case he’ll leave her
In her crazy kind of mind
Old memories they haunt her
And now they’ve made her blind
She does not see reality
She’s living in a dream
She’s built herself a nightmare
It’s just the way it seems.

She doesn’t see him laughing
And singing all the time
And how he is so loveable
And writes her lovely rhymes
How he cares so much when she is down
She never see those things
She sees the horror in her mind
That her thoughts so often bring.

When will she ever see him?
The way he really is
He’s wrote five thousand poems for her
All filled with loves sweet bliss
But is it not too late for her
When she lives back in the past
The damage done by foolish acts
It be so very vast

23 July 2013 @ 1250hrs






Details | Acrostic | |

Memories

Memories are all I have,
Intense and suffocating.
Churned out emotions needing salves
Healed, yet unrelenting

Abject surrender to your wiles
Embittered by time
Looming reminiscence of your smiles
Sealed in my mind

Anguishing on a future lost
Grieving over what once was, 
Agonizing at what it has cost
Remembering mem'ries of a distant past


Details | Light Poetry | |

Wine and Dine

Wining and dining,
Dancing and prancing
Hoping I'll score,
My money I'm chancing...

Desperate for love,
A body warm
All my sensualities
Begin to swarm

Peck on the cheek,
My $100 prize
I stood there still,
With glazed eyes

Inside she rushed,
With ne're a word,
I stood still on the stoop,
Like a highschool nerd

Was it my hair?
My breath?
My looks?
Does she see
My hands as hooks?

Home I went,
Head hung low,
Well, at least,
Now I know...

No vanity
Do I see...
Worthy of...
Overcoming me.


Details | Triolet | |

Stab, Choke, Torture, Shoot to Kill

The rage that screams against the sky A battle ground of angry hate Death's anger looms; threat reaches high The rage that screams against the sky A voice it struggles to deny The venom 'fore it spews too late The rage that screams against the sky A battle ground of angry hate. What made bit** think she could deceive A fam'ly grown so sick of hurt I'm one she thought that would believe What made bit** think she could deceive? Fed up with lies, we're so naive Her many victims her desserts What made bit** think she could deceive A fam'ly grown so sick of hurt. I want to choke her scrawny neck And make cruel vengeance mine to give To make her bleed, knife's wounds inflict I want to choke her scrawny neck And twist until I'm held in check But not 'fore I know she'll ne'er live I want to choke her scrawny neck And make cruel vengeance mine to give. I lay my head on Satan's bed The price was worth my deadly fate She's cold and lives with devil's dead I lay my head on Satan's bed No tear I shed, no more to dread It's over now, there's no more wait I lay my head on Satan's bed The price was worth my deadly fate.
Destroyer ~ Poet’s contest Name any poem with a strong title" (your poem title has to catch my eye) your most favorite outstanding title...


Details | Lyric | |

It's Not Over

Don’t say it’s all over (cause it’s not)
“Sorry” won’t cover it…so don’t go on your knees and pray for my forgiveness 
Oh baby…don’t listen to the commotion…I’m done taking cover (it’s all for naught)
I’m plummeting in slow motion…into the remorseful pit…I’m plummeting in my nightmare’s abyss

I want to carry you through the night… 
I’m swimming in the ocean of my tears… 
My sodden wings lost its ability of flight…
You've been swimming in your distress for years… 

Shut up! Don’t say it...
Don’t even think of it (don’t even ponder it)
Hey! Don’t say it’s all over…though we’re breaking bit by bit 
‘Cause there’s more treasure to discover 

I want to remind you to fight the good fight…
My misery pools are brewing inside of my head…
I’m backing away from the light & exploring the night… 
You’re giving in to sleep and I’m wide awake on my bed 

Shut up! Don’t say it...
Don’t even think of it (don’t even ponder it)
Hey! Don’t say it’s all over…though we’re breaking bit by bit 
‘Cause there’s more treasure to discover 

Please don’t tell me…oh, don’t tell me…darling!
You’re giving up today… (I beg you to stay, despite your inner pain) 
I’m scared I might erupt – it could be quite startling!
Someday, things will change for the better… (Don’t turn the wrong lane)
I’m waiting for that day to arrive – perhaps it will wash away our dismay…

I promise you a tranquil reality 
I want to stray with you tonight 
I still have hope that He’ll set us free
I was wondering if you could stay the night
Maybe the Lord could grant us 
Pure, incredible delight 

Shut up! Don’t say it...
Don’t even think of it (don’t even ponder it)
Hey! Don’t say it’s all over…though we've plunged into our own pit 
‘Cause there’s more treasure to gather…


Details | Dodoitsu | |

LUNGS WRAPPED IN BLACK


~ emptiness chokes lungs of night coughing from rib caged fever, a tight-rope walker lies still... amidst full moon’s howl pain, wrapped in black holocaust as her bridal dress withers, staining a torn, cancelled love… pre-nuptial songs crack ~ _________ Rick Parise's CONTEST: One Of Your Favz - 1 - 8 LINES!!! OLD POEM


Details | Haiku | |

Haikus About God: IV

God made all people
But some better than others?
Stop being silly.


Details | I do not know? | |

The Motherless Child

Whispers in your ear you fear

The child with no mother is near

As she promotes her soul within

To see you lifeless cunning grin

The warped faze and constant glaze

Undress your body with ever rage

As she smells fear from near your maze

Your mind at ease is restless peace

The clock strikes 12 tic toc heart stopped

She warms you up as her baby soft touch

Enters your cloned state of mind

From the cloned state of time

When things where in rhyme

Of a perfect loves chime

Ticking away the clock strikes 1

The motherless daughter shows you her fun

And see where it leads as she shows you who won

And see her heart bleed as her mother did once

The clock strikes 2 she reloads the gun

Points it at you as she smiles you hear the drum

Her heart beats loud keeping tune in her womb

As the trigger from her lonely motherless gun

Come to halt as the clock strikes back towards 1

She sees youuagain as you where back in time

Back in time when her mom was around showing prime

Back in time when she smiled at others with a crime

Back in time as she feels her heart stop in rhyme

Tick tock the gun pulled her shock

Back to time it did her

As the motherless deter

Bring your pain

Bring your shame

For we all are motherless sons

For we are all cowards of none

The same said for her

As the motherless daughter

Could fear nothing more

Than her shadow on the wall


Details | Free verse | |

The Never Ending Battle

Contractual agreements with publisher caused DELETION

JS Lambert



Details | Acrostic | |

The Invisible Man

The end of us breaks open both old and new cracks in my heart.
How come I couldn't see where my blind love would lead us,
Ending it again, you have, before our love could fully grow.

In the many, many years since I first fell in love with you,
Never did I think we'd find our love and then lose it.
Vanishing appears the only option left to me now,
Incredible loneliness once again my friend.
Surely God didn't intend our splitting?
Inside my heart you are big as ever.
But, I am a silly old romantic,
Long ago laden with love,
Ever waiting only for you.

Madness to love you?
About to find out.
Now I fade away.

Invisible...

Am I,
Me.

Going
Off
Now,
End.

10/06/12

Gone: breathless, cold, deceased, dead, departed, done, fallen, lifeless, lost, obsolete, vanished.

Invisible: concealed, discreet, hidden, inconspicuous, unnoticeable, unseen.


Details | Rhyme | |

Crossin the Picket Line in Heaven

There they stand
Swords in hand
The one has crossed their line
They wait so still
Lusting the kill
The one fears his own combine
Halos on the ground
Tossed with a frown
The one can feel the climb
His nation bleeds slow
His angels a glow
With death on their mind
He failed his armada
They stand like no other
Waiting for the one to come down
He slips on his robe
They feel shock in the globe
As he floats down the steps of his cloud
Cannibals roar with hate
They cant wait to debate
As the one prepares to cross the line
He delivered his words
With a shock in his verbs
And spelled out to his crew now sublime
He promises them
To follow through his amend
And fix all that broke from his hands
As he did prepare
A sword entered his bare
And sliced him open as they stand
"Know now you will die
From the hands of your spys
As we did all the work for you
Regret so do we
For too late so we be
And the damage was done from your move"
As the one passes on
The light turns to dark
His eyes shut as he sees himself true
For he greets himself kind
For he crossed the picked line
Of the Angels that he raised as his own
Now he lays dead
As they fight for the head
Of the one that gave them life from his clone
Be prepared to die slow
Befriend no one to make sure
That your head wont roll down life's bone


Details | Limerick | |

Way Back Yonder

I was madly in love once upon a time way back yonder;
When a goose wasn’t a pinched ass, but a bird called the gander.
I was sent off to war and she went only God knows where.
Historians agree that it was all worth it in the end, but they weren’t there.
The old saying is entirely true, absence does make the heart grow fonder.


Details | Haiku | |

Haikus About God: VI

The body: sacred
We’re all made in God’s image
Hence... circumcision?


Details | Sonnet | |

The Errant Knight

Seeing through the wav’ring flame of light
your porc’lain skin your brazen eyes so fair,
the songs which stir the depth of frosty night
do not waylay the course of love’s despair.

For love of King, not I, thine heart’s declared.
Oh, I am damned by wanton deed bespoke
on Furies wings my cursed heart’s ensnared   
and in the fire we shall rise on smoke.

My love I’ll not rescind, nor Him provoke.
Beside your sleeping form our bed a pyre, 
the curtain's caught in candle flame once stoked, 
we’ll go to Holy Hell within the fire,

a martyred Queen, an errant Knight so blind
for Kings and common men are seldom kind.


Details | Sonnet | |

Happy Anniversary!

The anniversary of your treason
Disturbs the air—again! Like every year
Floating, whispering, the one real reason
You left me; the name never leaves my ear.
“Him!” a name I can’t even speak, wouldn’t dare.
For it would cause chaos and confusion  
Too daunting, distances too far to bear, 
Can’t even comprehend that illusion.
You left me here to sit—sick! And the thought
Of you and him in that beautiful embrace…
It’s a damn shame what you did! I OUGHTA!!!!!
Just, calm down—please! Dear Lord, please give me grace.
	The love you gave—your perfect portrayal,
	The love you took—your perfect betrayal.

Submitted for Olusegun Adelana's "Betrayal" contest


Details | Free verse | |

The Teen

How do you say you love them?
They declare they don’t need you.
Then they ask if their clothes are clean.
You fix their lunch, and then they tell you to go away.
You give them lunch money so others won’t see you’ve fixed their lunches.
You give them the car, yet they won’t call to say they’ve arrived safely.
You tell them to pay attention when driving, but learn with the first real scare.
They say they can drive, then will wreck the car in the first year of solo driving.
They hug their girlfriends, but don’t want you around.
They need you in troubles, but can’t stand you in peace.
They go beyond the limits, then sneer at your demands.
They need help but won’t listen to your advice.
They need help but will try to do it all alone.
They want to be on their own, but depend on you.
They go off alone, but will keep coming back for yet a while.
They love you but will never say so.
They hate the situation they’re in, but aren’t ready to leave.
They think they’re ready for everything, but they’re not.
They think they’re ready to be alone, but the world won’t let them be.
I love my teen and will worry when he finally leaves.
His relief will be tinged with fear.
He will always be welcome back home, but may not come.
I will miss him and he will miss me, though he will never admit it.
He thinks I don’t understand how things are today, because I’m old.
Technology changes, but the emotions of growing up are always the same.
Needing to go forward, but feeling trapped remains the same with each generation.
Being held back by time, conventions, laws, and rules never changes.
I understand, they’re just too young to realize that I do.
I do understand, because I’m already standing in the world he wants to enter.
You will know they care after they’ve left home and call home to hear your voice.
Someday they may even come home, kiss you, and say thanks.

Contest: Coming of Age  2nd place


Details | Ballad | |

Zero

I was born pale and invisible
In a world
Sees everything 
Everything, everything….but me

Invisible to your touch
And doubt you’ll like me very much
Am I alive?
Was I ever me?

I’m a non-existent cipher
A pointless empty zero
Never added up to anything
A non-existent cipher
Pointless empty zero
Tell me….what does it all mean?

And now I think I want you
Ethereal body
Oblivious mask
And now I think I love you
Intelligent lips
Painted in black

But no need to look my way
Or give me the time of day

Can’t be with you 
In this world
Invisible man 
Never gets the girl

Oh, no...

I’ll find where you are
And watch from afar
You will be felt by me

I’ll find where you are
And watch from afar
You will be loved by me

Your 
Zero 
Tonight
Your 
Zero 
For life
Your zero
The day I die

Your zero….your zero

Zero


Details | Couplet | |

Tragedy

I needed you to see, yet you closed your eyes,
there could have been a we, if only you had realised.
I merely wanted your care, but instead received your denial,
with your heart no longer there, I was left feeling senile.
I gave you my time, and a person to cherish,
but you drew the line, for my sentiments to perish.
I wanted an us, but you wanted a you,
so despite the fuss, there was nothing left to do.

I walked away, believing things could have been altered,
with no time to stay, I left knowing my spirit had simply faltered.

For more poetry goodness visit  www.checkmyflow.co.uk 


Details | Rhyme | |

Flailin'

Flailin’,  flailin’, flailin’;
There goes my ball sailin’
Into a trap, the water or the woods.

Flailin’, flailin’, flailin’;
You can hear me wailin’,
“Why won’t that damn ball go where it should?

Drives go right.  Putts go wrong.
I shank my wedges or ‘skull’em’ long.
My golf game’s just no damn good.

I’m swingin’ too hard & lookin’ up;
As if I’ll actually see it go in the cup….
As if it ever really would.

My alignment’s too far left or right.
My ball can find the only tree or trap in sight,
Even if the shot starts out lookin’ good.

These days, I carry some special tools:
A handheld weed eater with extra spools
And a pruning saw, in case I’m in the woods.  

I’ve even tried to ‘buy’ a better game.
No matter.  My scores were just as lame.
Those new clubs didn’t do what they should.

Bogies & doubles...even triples... are common scores.
I very rarely get pars any more.
Believe me, I’d change it if I could.

My buddies said it must be me,
A teaching pro I should go see.
They said he’d fix my game…..if anybody could.

The pro said, “Hit some balls while I watch you.
Just set up and hit’em like you normally do.
We’ll see if I can do your game any good.”

After the first bucket of balls I hit,
He calmly said, “Take two weeks off…then quit.
Take my advice.  You really should.”

Now, what really has me vexed,
I’m wondering what I’ll try next.
That pro’s advice was no damn good.

So, I struggle along with my flailin’ game;
But, strangely enough, have fun just the same,
Finding hope in rare shots that are actually good.


Details | Dramatic Verse (Verse Drama) | |

A Little Less Explicit than the Original

there’s a casing on the floor for every lie you ever spun
make a case in pointing out they’re all coming undone
shameless is as shameless does, was there a point to prove?
well, i’ve got just what i needed now, so tell me, who used who?
two nights of lovin', lips bitten and sucking
ample reason to leave and proof it ain’t worth nothin’ to you

cause your mouth’s full of tricks; the proverbial ditch
and confirmed suspicions; the shovel with which
i’ll bury your name, and make no use of it,
filthiest word i ever knew

so justify for peace of mind, there’s nothing more for you
to find between the lines i write, you had everything to lose
i’ll lay it out and wear it thin.
red riding hood or wolfish grin?
just save your breath, kid. hold it in
and choke on your own excuse.


Details | Free verse | |

I Will Not Understand

The ocean sparkles
in the morning light.
We sip hot coffee;
you cough, turn your head.
Eyes say more than words.
Ties connecting us
dissipate in sunshine.
Waves which wash ashore,
this white-flecked water,
underscore your silence.
Last night, in humid darkness,
velvet-feeling black, we joined --
made pacts that daylight violates.
I will not understand your shame.
You will not see my heart-hurt face,
nor will you long remember
my already half-forgotten name.


Details | Free verse | |

The Devil's Daughter

I met the devil’s daughter on an elevator,
she was wearing a college tee shirt and faded jeans.
Who would have ever thought that someone so beautiful
was born and raised in the deepest part of the pit of hell.
It was great fun for a little while but after all my money was gone,
she also disappeared. I guess she is out somewhere trolling
for another stupid damn fool idiot just like me. I pity the fellow.


Details | Heroic Couplets | |

Need Me

You move with effortless grace.
 As I steal a glance of your chiseled face.
A sheepish smile makes my heart stop beating.
 To not get hurt again, should I be retreating?

I am "damaged goods" and I can't take that away.
 Afraid that forever that's the way I'll stay.
My smile hides all the hurt I have been through.
 Tell me, what will be so different about you?

Can you help erase all that has been said and done?
 Need me, so that I won't turn around to run.
I have lost myself too many times to count.
 Will your affections be enough for my fear to surmount?

You caress my cheek and steal my breath.
 Please Goddess take me away from this living death.
Help to favorably bear upon my tattered and bleeding soul.
 Use the elements to once again make me whole.

I beseech you to bless me with a favor from your heart.
 Have pity on me as I silently fall apart.
I am unsure of how much more heartache I can take.
 Listen closely and you can hear my heart slowly break.

I wait for him to hold my face and gently kiss me.
 My chest tightens and I can hardly breathe.
I wait with bated breath for his lips to finally meet mine.
 Our hearts and bodies long to intertwine.

I feel his gaze on me as I shamelessly daydream. 
 Heat rushing to my cheeks as the tears fall in a stream.
How could I get caught with my heart out on my sleeve?
 I'm not sure his love is a goal I'm able to achieve.

I taciturnly say a prayer to help me find some peace.
 In hopes that my fears will acquire a way to cease.
Need me, love me, find me, see me in a different light.
 My heart recognizes you and I no longer want to try to fight.


Details | Haiku | |

This will be my FINAL poem on the Soup

no more Soup for me all of YOU have pissed me off April Fools Suckers
JSLambert ~ This is the fabulous "Prankster Haiku" Haiku from the Heart Contest ~This is not your average Haiku. But I am not yir' average Joseph, for my "Prankster Haiku" form is highly Ex-plosiPH! Ya' DiGG?


Details | Rhyme | |

A Hole in the Universe

There’s a hole in the Universe
And I can see it from 
My 
Hearse

Driving to the graveyard 
For one final look

While the mourners 
Take photos
Filling an entire 
Facebook

There’s a hole in the Universe
And I can see it from
My 
Noose

Wrapped round my head
For one final jerk

Because I sent you 
Away
And it really
Hurts

But I won’t say a thing
Not a single peep
From a  man 
Made of stone
And the blood of a
Beast

Sing me one last melody
In that way you did
In a La La so sweet
La La La
La La La
My sweet

Sing me one last dirge
For the body 
You once held
In a La La so sweet
La La La
La La La
My sweet

You see

There’s a hole in the Universe
And I  can see it from
My
Place

Where the sky meets
The fire

Roasting hopes upon  
A pyre

And leaves me 

Wanting

One last
Touch

One last
Kiss 

One last
La La

So sweet

A taste of  perfect heaven

The complete Universe

I once found 

In

Your 

Baby Face.


Details | I do not know? | |

Love Is-

Love, I thought was meant to be
A word that makes you smile
Love, I thought was meant to be 
A feeling so worthwhile
Love, I thought was meant to make you laugh
Not make you cry
Love, I thought was meant to say hello 
Not say goodbye
Love is meant to leave you 
Feeling happy every day 
Love is meant to guide you 
So you never lose your way 
Love should be the dream 
From which you never want to wake
Love should be the person 
Whom you never will forsake
Love should be the one you lean upon
And your best friend
Love should be the reason for beginning
Not the end
Love’s a word I used to say
But now it’s in the past
Love to me is just a feeling 
Never meant to last
Love to me is just a word
Reminding what I had
Love is just a word that leaves me 
Lost, alone and sad
Love to me is make believe
A dream that can’t be real
Love just leaves a bleeding heart
A wound you cannot heal
One-day love is everything 
You ever dreamed would be
Then suddenly it leaves you
Saying “I” instead of “We” 



By Raina Hutchins


Details | Lyric | |

Unfinished

It's all the seasons,
All the seasons in my world;
Storming all around.

All these thoughts may fill my mind,
But my time is memories.

It might drive me crazy,
Fulfilling all those needs.
And all the seeds of "maybe"
Won't be planted with my greed. 

And you'll thank me one day.
Three birds, they told me so:
"Learn from the thorns in your side,
Roses always bloom too slow". 

And the room yells "Maybe"!
Surely I'd love to go.
But riding on the winds of maybe,
Surely I'll never know....


Details | Narrative | |

I Accepted the Potato Salad Because You Were Serving It

Yes, the time had allowed another opportunity to be near you,
Though well heaven knows whenever you are near my fear crunches my breath,
Leaving me starving for you, and wanting nothing more than to flee…

I stood in line, mainly because my family was there…
God knows I was not hungry at all…
Which is odd—I’m usually always hungry when I come to food gatherings
But there I was, my stomach swirling, and I looked out of the window,
And I saw you with the others, serving the food

My first thought was, great, here’s an opportunity,
And then the fear came—oh boy, what are you serving?
Are you serving something I like? 
Something I hate? 
So I closed my eyes and opened them again…
And I looked at what you were serving…
It was either macaroni salad, or potato salad; wasn’t quite sure at the time
I was more intrigued by how you presented yourself,
So friendly…so easy-going….so very natural and engaging

Damnit! The line is moving fast! 

I cringed at the thought of approaching you,
Even when I was following all the others;
And I knew you couldn’t be left insinuating-
Oh, that girl’s kinda weird and creepy…
I guess you’d only think that if I went to the table for the third time or something- 
But still, I was shaking with stupid thoughts

There was a problem though…
I do like macaroni salad… well, a little bit--I've never loved it
And I’m rather sick of potato salad frankly…
So if I refused the food, would you think it’s just another way to avoid contact?
Or will I give eye contact and smile at you, and say “no thank you”?
As I got closer, it was apparent it was potato salad…
And I begin to think
Well! Potato salad…it’s not that bad…let’s play it safe, shall we? Let’s get a little bit.

And before I knew it, I was where all the food was
You were talking speedily, happily with the others
About just everything it seemed… my ears heard blurs at this point
A lady offered me salad – I accepted the bowl and slowly put dressing on and looked up
And you smiled at me and said,
“Best potato salad in the world, right here.”
And I can’t remember if I smiled, 
But I most certainly lifted that stupid plate…
The lady next to you said, 
“and there’s another kind right beside it!”
I said quickly, “I think I’ll pass…” 
What she didn’t know was that I was trying to get the hell away before I vomited on everything and everyone...

I wasn’t hungry at all…
But one thing was certain…

I accepted the potato salad because you were serving it! 
And I ate it too… 
It wasn’t bad…in fact I could say pretty easily,
It was the best potato salad in the world

Right here….

You were… were….. right there.


Details | Rhyme | |

Torment

Making mountians out of molehills is driving me insane
Then you worsen it further by calling me some names
You tell me no one really loves and cares about me at all
I think you get a kick out of seeing me crumble and bawl. 

You seem to always believe the worst of me
Things made up in your head.... that only you see
I paid dearly for the mistakes I once made
I want to close the book and let them fade.

You forever remind me and make me pay
Most times you don't believe a word I say
Always accusing me of wanting to stray
The edges of my heart are starting to fray.

Controlling me emotionally is a game you like to play
Your right, I'm wrong, why does it have to be this way?
I would never hurt you, demean you or ever make you cry.
Please bestow the same courtesy or I might have to say goodbye.

You tell me I'm wonderful, beautiful and smart!
But something flips in your brain then you're tearing me apart
I believe you hate yourself for falling in love with me
And you want me to end it and finally set you free.

You should never belittle and hurt the one you love
Love is precious and fleeting as a dove
Our time on earth goes much too fast
I don't want to spend another moment living in the past!

Should I end this love affair? Or give us one more chance?
Are the wounds so festered maybe the only option is to lance?
I know I may never love another as completely as I did you!
But how much heartache and strife can I keep going through?


Details | Narrative | |

San Luca

He walks, rosary in hand, up the steps. 
His tread is broken, fragile, and the joggers 
Might hear his breath, each sharp inhalation, 
Each hissing exhalation, were it not for their 
Own breathless haste, their pounding feet, 
Strutting out their health in upward bounds. 

He takes a rest; age has bowed him. 
He wipes his brow. Sweat runs. Through 
The portico wall he watches the landscape 
Sizzle in the heat. Yet his feet are cold, so cold. 
No warmth can touch his extremities. The 
Deafening din of the cicadas sends him on. 

“Maria, beloved, only one, let me reach you, 
Give my feet strength, give my heart strength.” 
(666 arches up to San Luca, and how many steps? 
The devil is in the detail.) “Thank you, Maria, you 
Came to me in my dream, angel-light into this 
Dismal exile they call a Home.” 

Back there they will be wondering where he is. 
Nurses frantic, ringing round, searching. 
For months he sat slumped in his chair, they saw 
Him as already dead to the world, bled white of memory, 
Hands twitching to death’s tune, his soul dribbling down 
His neck, wan eyes watering into dissolution. 

But his pallour was contempt of all around – 
Dead to that, yes; turning inwards, away from 
The reek of disinfection toward memory fragrant 
With images of youth, his fingers dancing, his body 
Welling up with tears as he remembered her smile, 
An incandescence, illumination, true beauty. 

Onwards, upwards, she will be waiting like the last time, 
Her bridal tresses spilling from the sun, her gaze towards 
Him, a bouquet growing from her hands, from her waist the 
Cathedral train carrying all their dreams, and behind her 
San Luca, the organ music swelling the oleander-sweetened 
Air; she will be there, waiting for the last time. 

He climbs the final barrage of steps, and turns the corner. 
That is where the police await him, and Sister Grace, 
Who claps her hands in what could be indignation or relief, 
And he falls to his knees, his lips murmuring her name. 
“But your Maria is dead, Giorgio, long dead!” (Sister Grace shakes 
Her head), and she takes his hand and leads him away. 

She had found the faded photograph of the wedding by his 
chair, the rest had been intuition. Back in the home 
He appears confused, restless, in his bed he complains of 
Knocking – “don’t you hear it?” – and when the morning 
Comes he really is dead to the world, across his wizened 
Face an expression of grief too hard to bear.


Details | Verse | |

Inevitable Bear

Oh lonely Inevitable Bear,
Padding claws, death in white
Sorrow in recurring nightmare
Instinct’s test; fight or flight?

Camouflage against the fence,
A challenge; my subconscious fear
Ominous slowly moving silence,
“Let me in, there’s a bear out here!”


Details | Narrative | |

First Love

You say, you say
But what do you do?
It’s always wanting more with you

How many hours wasted waiting?
Desperately needing...anticipating
Drawn out desperate un-returned calls
Echoes of reason, only faint footfalls

Still I wait and long for you
Because I love…..I’m hopelessly true
I picture you elsewhere, not alone
Blatantly ignoring the ringing phone

You’ll be here tomorrow, dripping sincerity
While I cry silently, developing clarity
I know this game…all too well
You’ll have another story to tell

And I will listen…take it all in
For I can’t bear to lose you, or let her win
So I pretend, accept, and forgive
If only to gain one more day to live

Because I love, I give you my heart
Even though you have been careless from the start
Intentional victim, I pity myself
While you court her with practiced stealth

My first love…you will always be
Impossibly perfect, if only to me
So I forgive you and delay the inevitable
My devotion to you is truly incredible

Now, looking back…I see you at last
For all that you lacked and all that you asked
How carelessly you held my heart in your hands
But I’ve taken it back, less a few strands

Thank you for the lessons; for teaching me
That love does not come easily
For all of your injuries and slights have been measured
And in the end, despite the pain…within my own heart, 
I’ve found abundant treasure


Details | I do not know? | |

Missing Puzzle Peace

We play we fight 
But it never fills right
What is this thing that's in my heart
I don't know what to call it 
Hate? Love? Dread?
Or is this only in my head!
I cant figure it out
You are my world
You are my enamie
You are my deception
What is this spell you have cast on me
I don't know what i am asposed to see
Are you asposed to be here
Or am i to let myself go
Free of the questions 
Of all the things i keep asking over and over
Why, why, why? what am i to do now
Why cant i just find that missing
Puzzle peace so i shalt know
How my life should be compleat....


Details | Couplet | |

Indigenous I Am, from the Stolen Generations

This is a journey, a trip call it what you will It follows the footsteps of my ancestors, and allows my thoughts too spill Firstly let me take you back, to tell you so little of my past Indigenous I am, from the "Stolen Generations" I did not last This is why I must make this journey, to allow me to find the real me To retrace the few steps I made, to rediscover what my young eyes seen How ironic that the person I'll ride with, is the son of the then official Whose deliberation to round up us children, the scene, locale It's now the morn of our travel, where I look I find hard to see The peripheral of the distant horizon, is all that really captures me The town where I grew up so young, barely to the age of five Perth, now bustles like a termites nest, zig zagging in busily strive Into the bush we go, to a place where us youngsters so enjoyed Moore River Native Settlement, which soon became children void As I walk my arid lands, patterned in the heat of this day I recall with every step, where us Indigenous children played We could survive on the smallest of fruit, water we could easily find Even the son of the then official, said that we are a superior kind He marvelled when I spotted tracks, traces of where animals crossed Remembering back to when I was five years old, our lands always talked We opened up as we led our horses, introduced all those centuries ago They opened up my lands, rivers we walked, now the white man flows This is a journey I had to make, it's called, it's in my will No more "Stolen Generations" no more will my culture spill


Details | Free verse | |

Empty

And when I learned that you died
How can I describe
The empty
Empty
Empty

You were my boxer in the night
Sparred with you 
About every aspect of
Life

My secret tonic
Made everything
Feel alright
Got me through it all
All the frustrations
Disappointments of 
Life

And when I learned that you died
How can I describe
The empty
Empty
Empty

We called each other friend
Even when
Our bodies came together
That single
Lunatic
Moment

That single 
Lunatic
Time

And it felt so 
Full
You made me feel
Full
How can I describe 
The full
Full
Full

My life was full
When you laughed
It felt so full even
When you 
Cried

The times I was mean

And my body left
Your body
After 
That single
Lunatic 
Time

And so we pretended 
We were just
Friends
In the end
We pretended
Then

And now you’re 
Gone

And I can barely speak
Or write 
I can barely write
A 
Single
Meaningful
Poetic
Word

And there’s a quiet room
In my mind
Where your laughter
Once
Played
My innocent child
Woman
Gone 
Away

How can I describe
The Empty
Empty 
Empty

How can I describe
The empty
Empty
Empty

How can I describe
The
Way
I
Feel?


Details | Ballade | |

lost

You know the best part of going trough hard times with someone you love is supposed to bring you closer together.  In the long run it seems to do nothing but tear your insides apart to the point that you have nothing left to feel.  The whole thing about loving someone is supposed to be the act that you look out for their well being.  Their are things that you want to share with that other person but you call yourself looking out for their feelings Especially if you know they have tremendous stress of their own.  But when it all comes down to it, even though you were trying to think of them and protect them, you still wind up being the bad guy.  It is hard to see someone you love go through so much pain. When they are the love of ur life you want to protect them.  You don't try to lie to them. You tell the bits and pieces of things because you know that they hae their own issues and stress.  When you're used to going through everything alone and having nobody to depend on EVER.  It is hard to let go of everything, Especially when you know the love of your life is going thru such  a difficult time.  If someone loses there trust in u it is hard to get back.  I you truly love someone, love should conquer all. Maybe thats just another DISNEY fAIRY TALE our parents should have never read us!!!


Details | Carpe Diem | |

Pricked

Your  love pricks me like a rose each thorn grows but no one knows Your so full of 
it as it shows so carry on now go on, go. I'm fed up with the phony and  i'm 
through with the tears, you couldn't pay me all your money to make up for those 
years. Someone help me I feel faint how could I think he was such a saint and 
worst of all I let me fall into a spiral down below. A magic called love carried 
by the dove of someone I use to know.


Details | Ghazal | |

Ghazal

I  met a man with scars in New Orleans
He worked a hustler bar in New Orleans

He went to The Double Play bar by bus
He did not own a car in New Orleans

He offered his body to hungry men
In sex, he would go far in New Orleans

He protected me from men on the street
Yet he had battle scars in New Orleans

War had taken a toll on his psyche
His actions were bizarre in New Orleans

I controlled his behavior but sometimes 
I loved him from afar in New Orleans

If someone insulted me in the club
With that man he would spar in New Orleans

He watched over me and looked after me
My heart was left ajar in New Orleans

I grew to care for his six foot four frame
Hard to say au revoir in New Orleans

He always called me Mr. Ethington
Caring far above par in New Orleans.


Details | I do not know? | |

I Close My Eyes

I close my eyes...

Your hands run over my hips,
Followed closely by your lips,
As you sit afore me on the bed;
Sending frissons from my toes to head.


I close my eyes...

I feel your eyes upon me:
What is it that you see?
Some-one with whom to have fun?
Something to discard when you’re done?


I close my eyes...

Time has passed
I still feel your touch
Or is it just in my mind
Because I want it so much.


I close my eyes...

You’re not here.
You won’t be here again.
Tears stream down my face
In a river of pain.


Details | Sapphic stanza | |

concrete

Certain, certain be when a heart is breaking,
banish doubt and conquer the simple truth: that
love does not defer to the circumstantial
                          (nor to my logic)


Details | Terzanelle | |

Love's Last Call - triplet

Whenever he reeks of alcohol
I know he’s been on an angry crawl
To flush away heartache’s waterfall


8/14/11

Received 3rd place in "Triplet" contest


Details | Carpe Diem | |

I

If its money I got its money ill keep. If its money I have its money ill weep. If its love that I give its love ill receive. For I am but no one who just see's beneath. Some say your only as strong as you feel, but how could we change..in a place that's so unreal. People are hearing but..not really hearing. Why is the world so blind. I keep on screaming and screaming and screaming for things to be revolutionized. I am just a small song in a world full of cries, laughter, tears and french-fries.


Details | Tanka | |

Angel of Love

Life’s blood out of stone
the old veins penetrated
yet fears losing you,
a renewal a license
for happiness oh so late!

© Harry J Horsman 2013     


Details | Free verse | |

Tourette

I am a monster
A tormented work of God’s hand
I will roll over you
Like a storm
Because that I am

My energy will attract you like a swarm of bees in spring
Into your lover’s bed
Where I will remove tranquility
From you mind
Before you reject me

I am a Tesla 
Coiled
My fingers set to spark
They will suck the life out of your longing
You will desire to burn again in my hell

But you will remove me
And keep me at bay
For I am too strong in field
To leave close to your heart
Yet I will possess you

Not because I own you
Only will I own your desire
To wrap around my tongue again
And from inside your womb
You will grow a hand longing to pull me into your core

Yet I will unwillingly shake your bed 
While you try to sleep
Because I cannot stop
Even when I rest
A storm I am

Cursed am I
With a double vortex of pain
That rips at my muscles
And makes them twitch
When I want them to relax

There is lightening inside of me
That longs to be kissed into a deeper slumber
Just once, so that I can rest in bliss at your side
Will you do that for me, just once?
Or throw me away before the first dawn, as is my fate

My tormented soul
Wants the electrocutioner’s pulse
To leave me alone
And let my limbs recline
For just one night

But instead I must sleep awake
So I do not unleash
Another crushing wave
Against your brain
As my twitching arms attack you despite my love

For while a storm may intrigue you to watch
You will not ride long in the funnel of this tornado
I will become your toy
And discarded after a few shocks of my constant sparking
Have burned your precious fingertips into charcoal

My place will become as your sworn servant
When you require another grinding
And remember the reason your millstones have worn thin
Desiring another load
To render into stardust

And while I just wish to rest my weary head
Upon your swollen breasts of honey
While you sleep against me in pleasure’s afterglow
The storm that never sleeps will jar you awake
And your pointed finger will show me out the dog’s door

Creep that I am
Requires his mask to be kissed away, but it will not yield
No one can endure
A lasting embrace
Because I will bump your arms away in the night

You should be warned
As upon notice be you now informed
My tic ticking heart
Will demand its daily toll
Sending me to sleep alone


Details | Rhyme | |

Divorce by Email

My fingers dance with such energy across the keyboard.
The romance deep within me is sharp as a sword;
Cutting into your heart with only one single intent,
to rip you apart and cause you so much torment!

I want you to feel pain with each sentence and paragraph.
An emotional bloodstain, and me with the last laugh.
You reap what you sow, and this time you're the fool.
You thought I didn't know, but I smelled your cesspool!

So carefully read these words, no more credit cards and mink coats.
Pay attention to the verbs, no more diamonds to go around your throat!
The papers have been filed, no more lavish lifestyle for you.
I'm still wearing a smile despite the sh#t you put me through!

So by the time you get this, your bags will be packed and out the door.
I hate that your pretty lips I use to kiss, were lips of a whore!
I hope this email finds you in an emotional hell with such force;
That it makes it hard to exhale, because I want a divorce!!!


*Note: I wrote this for my ex wife, who happens to be my youngest daughter Lilly's
mom...


Details | Ballade | |

I CAN'T LIVE LIKE THIS ANYMORE

I speak but you don't want to hear it
My burdens you're not interested to bear
Your here but I'm alone at this moment
I'm at the brink my cup's full of despair 

So I hide in the hopes of my lyric
But your upset someone else might care
Bothered by every sweet comment
You're worried that I might go somewhere

I can't live like this anymore
Inside, I'm longing for something more
Outside I smile, but my heart's at war
God knows I'm shaken to my core
Girl, I just can't live like this anymore

I see out the window a storm is coming
Dark clouds roll in here comes the rain
Hitting the window in rhythmic numbing 
I'm lost in this whirlwind of silent pain

I can't live like this anymore
Inside, I'm longing for something more
Outside I smile, but my heart's at war
God knows I'm shaken to my core
Girl, I just can't live like this anymore

So I'm fighting though the blindness
There's one on my mind she's in sight
I hear her voice against my window
I might let her in if it feels right...

'Cause I can't live like this anymore
Inside, I'm longing for something more
Outside I smile, but my heart's at war
God knows I'm shaken to my core
Girl, I just can't live like this anymore



Details | Rhyme | |

How is it possible to love yet not be

There's no comfort like that which I have with him On this I've come to depend He knows me better than all Always been there; catches me before I fall He places no one before me In his eyes love is all I see No matter the time of day A simple call and he's on his way I do the same for him With him I always win So why is it that we love Yet we cannot be This is the unanswered question That continues to haunt me Our connection is stronger than steel Our bond is everlasting, Our love is real Lay


Details | Couplet | |

Empty Castles

I eat "ice cream castles" from the air
Now there are no clouds anywhere
Within blue skies the world is clear
I stretch my hand to bring him near

Climbing upward on a "ferris wheel"
From luscious lips a kiss to steal
We know love, from "both sides now"
A pleasured moment a broken vow

Sad and smokey, tortured eyes
Within metal cocoon, we try to rise
As the wheel turns, we both shall fall
We want everything, but can't have it all

The ride is over, the game is done
I can't share our story with anyone
The castle crumbled, clouds back in the air
I dream my dreams, I can still smell his hair

Lonely is the path, some lovers choose
I sit with red wine and sing my blues
As smoke dances, on thickened air
I love a lover that isn't there


For Freddie's contest, I wrote this from a female perspective.











Details | Rhyme | |

Love

Love breeds hate, we are her children,
lost and scared, blasé and meek.
We curse the ones who left us lonely
and blame the ones who made us weak.

Love will shove you to the ground,
on all your fours to crawl through dust.
You'll lift your head towards the sunrise
to catch some light but only just.

Love breeds fear, now watch me shiver:
too scared to open up the door,
in case in comes another stranger
to add more damage to the sore.

Love will leave you lying breathless,
your body scattered on the bed.
A hopeless pilgrim gone off radar,
still longing for the words she said.

Love will show you the error
of your pathetic little ways.
With every hand the stake gets higher
and in the end - the loser pays.

Love will never give you pity,
too many fallen, fools galore.
A lesson learnt, I should know better
but here I am, begging for more...


Details | Lyric | |

Have I told you lately that I love you

Have I told you

Have I told you lately that I love you?
Have I told you just how much I care?
Have I ever told you?
when I am with you darling
The power of bliss and joy is everywhere

Have I told you how my heart is yearning?
To feel you here within my sweet embrace
Have I ever told you?
That whenever I am with you
I melt within your beauty and your grace

I look at you and feel such joy within me
You smile at me and everything feels grand
Have ever I told you 
When you are with me Darling
A feeling comes that I don’t understand

I know that there will never be another
Could fill my heart with love the way you do
My darling let me tell you
You’re all I ever live for
I love you with a love so pure and true.

Have I told you that each night when I am sleeping?
Your image haunts my dreams and gives me bliss
You make me feel so happy
Every moment I am with you
You mesmerize me, dear, I tell you this


Details | Haiku | |

Alone

Darkness in my room.....
the pain of your absence
suddenly vivid.


Details | Lyric | |

ETERNAL SUMMER

Eyes so dark
I feel your pain
Nightmares unending
Driving you insane
Feeling so blue
You think you could die
But now in my arms
Look in my eyes
The flowers and streams
That's me and you
Feel eternal summer
Forever love is true
The peace you see
Now you will feel
These are your times
This happiness is real

Date: 11-8-14


Details | Rhyme royal | |

A getaway Life

It's hard to remember memories of grief, getting away for a little while is a relief. Life is like an art, and everyday you get the chance to start. May not be on others side, But my love for them can never divide. endless tears & promises broken, thoughtless words have been spoken. So I must leave for a while, So I can go back with a huge smile. Let me heal the scars, & fill each of my waking hours. This might be just a getaway life, just to escape suffering & strife. Let me search & find my way, to find words I can truthfully say. It may be selfish, but there's just so many reasons, to heal every emotions. Because this time, I want Happiness, & maybe reach for success. I know I have a guardian & a guide, who is always on my side. In a million ways, He's in disguise, to encourage & give me reasons to Inspire. Some are unimportant as it seems, But slowly, God brings reality to dreams. & like a pilgrim, I'll wander, to this journey that can make me even stronger. I've learned so much that money cannot measure, All of my priceless treasures. This is the unplanned surprise, to make me realize. That I just got to beLIeVE, give room to forgive. because what cannot be found, can just be around. Oh & let me find my romance, Not just by fate, nor by chance. So don't count the days that I'm away, feel it closely, in your heart is where I'll always stay.


Details | Sonnet | |

Sea of Unrest

A weight bound tight inside of her prison, Does no man acquire the strength that's due? She sinks down deep as high tide has risen, As her figure's swallowed by darkest blue Resignating, do her lungs open so, Oh, how she opens the gate to her death; Crushed by the pressure, she rocks to and fro', Not even with closure of one last breath The waves crash above and smother below, It was the blackest of waters she'd known; Suddenly, pressure was letting her go, And the most loveliest light was then shown A pair of hands came for me, cold and wet; Eyes upon me, and but a lovers set.


Details | Quintain (English) | |

An Orchid for my Rose

AN ORCHID FOR MY ROSE?

Your eyes lead me to the Rose
that within your heart your soul,
yet it is the orchid chose
that leads me here, a mind stole
in dreams of the perfect goal.

Now lost am I to you Rose
a loser in mortal shame,
inept another I chose
took a chance on just a name
because life said ‘one of fame.’

Alas this lesson I learn
it’s not how one sees the frame
the truth within this I yearn,
for i am the one to blame
for dousing our true love’s flame!

© Harry J Horsman 2012

For Francine Roberts English Quintain contest
4th Nov 2012


Details | Epyllion | |

From Dusk Till Dawn

Distant You Were In Tortured Dreams

*Even My Imagination Won’t Let Us Entwine*

Your Eyes Spoke Miles of Unavoidable Truths

*Honesty That Should Only Exist in Reality*

Every Night I Loved, Every Day I Lost

*When Will This Ache End?*

You Took Away My Rest and Left Me Exhausted

By Your Commitment to Haunt Me


*At Last Illusions Evolve to My Hearts Contentment*

From the Touch of Hands

Now Those Nights Could Never Cause Resentment




Details | Rhyme | |

America Is Being DESTROYED From Within

 

As sin and perversion often become integrated… So many lives and families are being “disintegrated.” Many are being driven by sin’s temptation force… It’s no wonder much of this country is way “off course.” The morality and values that once made a great nation. Are evaporating…. Leading to a “spiritual separation.” Love, honor, and respect of God… Is often a “thing of the past.” Anything of God seems to be disappearing FAST! God is our only hope! And him alone! Only he can bring healing to our broken homes! He’s the answer to this wounded nation, that bleeds! It’s only God that can meet all of our needs! He’s our provider… The great: “I am!” Won’t you reach out to him? And give him your hand? Why not give him a chance? And allow him in? A brand new life for you… Is waiting to begin! May we allow God’s holiness and love to reach down into our hearts… Asking; “Lord please forgive our sins!” Is a good place to start! By Jim Pemberton


Details | Haiku | |

What People Were and What People Are

People were
Many things.
Strange or not

People were
Different and
Odd and fun.

People were
Monsters but…
That’s not all

People were
And still are
Strange and odd.

People are
People. For
life is life. 

Yet not.
Not is lies.
Truth seeps from

Every mouth
Lies, lies, lies
Move, move, move

But somehow
Lies prevail.
Lies are life.

Lies are death.
Lies are homes.
Lies are pain.

Lies are truth.
Yet somehow.
Truth prevails.

Truth is life.
Truth is death.
Truth is home.

Truth is pain.
Truth is lie.
Truth is that.

Lies will die.
Lies will cease.
Nevermore.

Truth will live.
Truth will be.
Forever.


Details | Free verse | |

Offended

Offended 
is ignorance
a lack of understanding
silence 
is not for everyone

humans speak
and do things 
different than you
or your faction
true 
or untrue
or stretch truth

what's the worry?
stressing 
over someone else's beliefs 
takes you away 
from your own routine

offended 
is a waste of energy
needed for nothing
causing dangerous sparks
within one's mind
one's heart
one's soul
becomes contaminated
with preoccupations

vengeance breeds furious
often unexpected actions
of ill-will occur 
or changes for the worse 
creep 
in the shadows of good
growing
taking over
"spiritual kudzoo"
none could tame

extinguish your dealings
with petty rage
of another imperfect being's mouth
cancer vanishes easier
with early detection
MOVE ON!
or at least learn
from your polar opposite 


Details | Rhyme | |

Love Is Louder

Love they say is louder than hate.
But I think that it’s a shame,
That only holds true when you have a pretty face.
Maybe I’m a disgrace,
For saying such a thing,
But think about your life and how true that *****rings.
And I cannot deny what this mirror is reflecting,
What’s standing in my way is only one thing.
It was beauty killed the beast,
In famine it will bring feast.
And sideways glances, second chances, you’ll get those at least.
But what about me?
What about us?
It’s power like money,
It drives greed,
it drives lust.
So what about you?
What can we do?
All I can hear,
The sounds that make the world disappear.
Love is louder than hate, but I can’t hear it from here.


Details | Verse | |

Last Chance Saloon

NOTE: I don't find the time, neither do I have much inclination, to write a great deal these 
days. However, the occasional new piece gets composed, and this is one. I would like to take 
this opportunity to thank everyone - Ruben, Raul, Andrew, Elaine, Patricia, Carol, Adeleke, 
Krista, Trudi, Kristin, Bill, Shishir, Sami, James, Trudi and many, many others - who have 
been so kind, supportive and appreciative both now and in the past. You are stars. I am in 
your debt.

I know it's not the happiest piece, but it's what I have at the moment.

T.

Last Chance Saloon:

The deadbeat shuffle from Boardwalk to Boot Hill
Implores the synapse circuit of a short walk to the kill,
With one foot out of line one soon is gone
In Winter rains that fell all Summer long;
Never once did Zeus advise to pack a bag,
Only suck it up and tread the old main drag.

When first she shed her morals and her dress,
The channel burn adored her more than less,
Post-coital walks, romancing in the sun
Beat a path to living in the shadow of the gun;
As expectation always lets one down,
Rends the heart in two by softly skipping town.

From the stained-glass of an alcoholic haze
Wherein kaleidoscopic migraines snap and blaze,
The rusty barrelled gun scrapes at the head,
All the chambers full of coals and glowing red;
She resurfaces like some immortal doll,
And each bullet tastes of paracetamol.

So to raise the weary glass to mouth again,
To curse and toast her godforsaken name,
To down the medicine and down some more
And ride the bona-fide revolving bat-swing door;
Swear by saints alive to never leave this room,
No more chances left to chance in this last chance saloon.


Details | Rhyme | |

Circle of Life - A Pet Story

It seems like just the other day
Our pup, Shadrack, did pass away;
And altho’ they never seemed like friends,
My old cat, Jorg, knew Shad had met
   his untimely end.

He mourned his loss every day
And looked for Shadrack everywhere.
He’d mew and moan as if to say,
“We were friends.  I do care.”

Then one night, an eerie howl
Awoke me from my sleep.
He’d found Shad’s toys and left no doubt
That his feelings did run deep.

So our tedious search began
To find another likely pup;
But while my poor wife still grieved,
Could another measure up?


We went to Second Chance and Free to Live.
She just could not make up her mind.
She loved them all; but, if she picked just one,
The rest would have to stay behind.

Then, quite by chance, there was a “pound pup”
Who’d been picked up from the streets.
He was a mutt, a “schnauza-pug”;
But he was awfully sweet.

He jumped up and kissed her frantically.
He seemed aware of his “iffy” situation.
He made the best of his opportunity.
Tears of joy told her elation.

“This is the one”, she smiled through tears,
As she held him oh, so tight.
“I’m sure that Jorg will like him too.
Everything will be alright”.

And so it was, until one day
When old Jorg did pass away…

There was no hesitation on this sad occasion;
Come Saturday morning, we went straight 
   to the pound,
Open minded and hoping to be “saviors”,
Surely a nice cat was to be found.

“Sadly”, the lady said,” three kitties have only today.
There’s Andre and Panda and another one too”.
My wife smiled and said, “Jorg was your boy.  You pick.
They’re both beautiful cats.  It’s up to you”.

As I pondered this commitment
Another cat, a young one, caught my eye.
Like Jorg, he was a common gray tabby.
Fond memories were stirred.  I almost cried.

On closer look, his name was Boris;
And, strangely, he was number three.
There was a small sign on his crate,
“I don’t like other cats and other cats don’t like me”.

But there was character in his eyes and he was cute.
He was rolling and purring and stretching.
He seemed to look deep into my heart
And did his best to be quite fetching.

But because he was just a common gray tabby,
And because of the little sign,
His chances were slim, his future quite dim
And one day is precious little time.

For a moment I was lost in his eyes
And I heard his desperate plea, 
“I’m a swell cat and litter box trained.
Take me.  Please, take me”.

“Well”, my wife urged, “is it Andre or Panda”?
“One of us will take the other kitty.”, two older ladies chimed.
“You can each have one ladies”, I said with a smile.
I want Boris and he wants to be mine”.

In just hours he was romping and rolling with Pepper,
Who had happily welcomed his new friend.
Boris was a perfect fit, an affirmation;
The Circle of Life never ends.

Much more Joy than Sadness in this Circle,
And there should never be regrets.
Honor their memories and all the love they share,
Never break the Circle, never be without a Pet.


Details | Rhyme | |

Forbidden Angel

Forbidden Angel

Peacefully you slept
    my handsome angel
whose heart I kept
    safe and secure
I protected it...

    with intentions pure
love everlasting 
    no pain would you endure
you were my angel
    I was your cure...

to my surprise
    you were an angel in disguise
you touched my heart
    but heard no cries
my face was dry...

    filled with pride
my mind wept
      while to my face you lied...     

Why handsome angel
    why lie to me
on your wings I was home
    in your arms I was free
now I fly alone
    this didn't have to be...

My handsome angel
    I've let go of your wings
I have set your heart free
    now fly on and be happy
you are now and forever 
    a forbidden angel to me...

Lay


Details | Blank verse | |

Losing Sight

Why was I given these eyes that hide 
Behind this clumsy heart-
Hands and knees forever searching 
For an honest soul?
It feels as though we're wringing water
From a dusty rag.
It feels as though we're submerged in longing 
Ever drowning in our thirst.

Why was I given these eyes that grope
For another’s warmth,
When love is fired through a gun,
Or taken from a calloused hand;
Sight has cursed my heart to see
The naked spent to dust.

Blindness,
Kiss me with your tasteless lips and I will see no more.
I will not see their tears through mine,
I will not see their laughter;
I will not see their careless words,
Looking dumbly after.
I will not see their hateful glares that only’ve seen hateful eyes.
I will not see their broken ears that never hear my broken cries;
They’ll all be black to me.

Jacob Reinhardt							09/11/2013


Details | Lyric | |

Summertime Re-Lyric

Summertime…and the livin’ is easy,                                                
Flowers growin’ and the sun’s sittin’ high.                                    
Your Daddy’s rich and your Momma’s so good lookin’;               
So hush, pretty baby…you got no reason to cry. 

One of these days, you’re gonna rise up smilin’.
Take a look around and think you’ve got it all.
You’ve got your Momma’s looks, all your Daddy’s money,
And all the boys in town are at your beck and call.

Summertime…and the livin’ is so easy,
Laughin’, singin’, havin’ so much fun.
No time to stop and think about your future
And what life will bring when your Summer’s  done.

‘Cause Summertime, it don’t last forever.
Breezes cool and the leaves begin to fall;
And in your quiet moments, you sit and wonder
How you've come so far, but have no love at all.

Yes, Summertime…and the livin’ was so easy; 
Ain’t it sad how fast the good times fly; 
And now your Momma’s looks and all your Daddy’s money
Another sweet, warm Summer’s day they cannot buy. 


Details | Dramatic monologue | |

NOTHING WITHOUT YOU

drop by drop it's dripping away
time elapses like a rolling tide
fast, strong and sudden
it will shove you on left or right
above or down under
only the tide knows where
above all 
only God knows where
where is right or wrong
which one is better or worse
and He knows sure which is the best for us
faith... 
enduring selfless faith
surrendering to Him 
all fears, anxieties and tears
all that there is..
to His words that I cling..
in the wee hours that am alone
only to Him I utter the words
sometimes I can't anymore even
say the words
just the tears rolling on my cheeks
that will tell
how am I feeling inside
my insides are bursting
my thoughts are breaking
all i have are pleas
pleas that I hope soon it will be heard
soon it will be answered
I do not want to question
I do not want to even doubt
I do not even want to blame
I do not even want to curse
All I do is to hold on
Hang on.. hang on..
so tired, so tired..
long enduring nights where no one I can talk but Him
yet each day I wake up
still.. still I stand up..
resume like nothing really bothers me
I smile the brightest smile they say
but my eyes can not hide 
so many longings inside
I am trying to understand
but it seems understanding isn't enough
patience... much patience...
and really strength...
strength to hang on
strength to carry on
strength to keep fighting
but through it all
this prevails
I still love you my God
and will still be here
Thanking you 
for what you have done
and to what You will still do 
For I am forever Yours
And all of these comes from You
I am nothing without You.

(C) Olive ELoisa
1:33am
May 23, 2014


Details | Free verse | |

Healing Begins

I find myself sprawled on the floor
Frantically trying to gather the pieces
My heart has been shattered
Jagged, sharp, crimson colored shards
I lay wounded, unaware of my surrounding
The surface is hard and cold, a slab of granite
A crowd of onlookers, strangers stop to stare
They gasp in disbelief at the spectacle
I have a front row seat, standing room only
The sunlight has pierced my soul, I lay exposed
Heartbroken, abandoned, dignity is out the window
I'm holding a bloody big chunk of my heart
I tell myself, breathe in, breath out
I close my eyes, so that I may see with clarity
With eyes closed, the view is breathtaking
Healed, healthy, vibrant and alive
Still with my eyes closed, wide open,  I see the crowd
They begin to applaud, then quickly disperse
I become the lone witness as my heart heals itself
As the darkness explodes into sunlight, triumph
Delete sadness. Insert hope. 
I hear someone in the crowd singing my song

~Rick Berry


Details | Rhyme | |

Voice In A Restless Night

Go to sleep, My love,
Rest your weary head,
You have a long day tomorrow,
Nothing should you dread.

Go to sleep, My love,
Give it all to Me,
Your burdened heart, your tears that fall,
Surrender and be free.

The night is dark and quiet,
It's silence you now fear,
Be at peace, the day is done,
And I am ever near.

Go to sleep, My love.


Details | I do not know? | |

I Need You

I need you
To clutch me tight and
Wipe my tears away.
Telling me 
‘I know it looks bad but it’ll get better’.
 
I need hope
To come along and
Recuse me from 
The ceaseless
Pit I recurrently fall into.
 
I need someone
To be there when
I have my blade.
To say
‘Don’t damage your beauty’.

But you aren’t there.

You don’t listen;
Not to me.
I’m never there for you,
You completely
Shut me out.
 
As if I don’t care.
Like I’m not good enough.
Too pathetic; too worthless.
Not worth
The trouble.
 
So no one takes 
My blade from me.
And the angry lines slash
My arm
In every direction.
 
So there is a hopeless void
Inside of me, 
That grows bigger
Every day.
As you push me further away from you.
 
And I cry, 
Every night I cry myself
To sleep. Focusing on beaten
Broken hearts.
Because without you there is no reason to go on.


Details | Dramatic Verse (Verse Drama) | |

A Homeless Man Named Sam- Part 3

He’d had a hard life, with lots of worries and many medical bills to pay
 It all started he said, when his wife became ill, on that sad, spring day in May
 He tried to keep it all together for her, so she wouldn’t have to worry 
She was so sick and frail, then her mind slowly became very blurry
 She hung on for her life, but over time her memory slowly began to fade away
 “It was such a long hard time”, he said, “Then an Angel took her home on a warm July day”
 
My heart was breaking as I pensively sat, listening to him quietly talk
 With tears in our eyes, we sat together, then I asked if we could go for a walk
 “People always pass me by,” he said, “As if I’m not even standing there”
 “You’re the only one,” said he, “Who’s taken the time to even show you care”
 “I don’t want their sorrow or pity”, he said, “Just some friendly care and love”!
 “I lost my wife and my life, when an Angel took her from above”
 “Never a tear in their eyes, or a friendly smile, never offering to lend a hand”
 “What if I was an angel?” he said, “Sent from God and no one lent me their hand”?
 
After we left that cafe on that hot day in September 
I found a tiny emblem of an angel in my jacket pocket Something he must have left for me in order to remember 

Let this be a real good lesson to all of us, as a test of our brotherly love
 You never know if that homeless beggar is an angel sent from above
 I always think this to myself whenever I see a person in need
 “Are they an angel unaware looking to me for a helpful deed”?
 
Stop and listen to the call you hear, the one your heart’s been given
 Help those you see, take up their cross help them while you’re still living
 Whenever passing by someone you see in need, try to let go of your greed
 Stop and heed your heart, give them a hand and do them a helpful deed.
 
 It’s been three weeks now, since I’ve seen Sam standing on that street
 I've been so worried I stopped and asked many others that I meet
 “Has anyone seen that man named Sam, who stands alone on this corner”?
 When no one seemed to know, I asked my friend, that small café owner
 
He told me that he’d seen Sam just the other day
 “It seemed odd”, he said, “But he never even looked my way”
 A couple days later, I happened to read a short story in our local news
 It told of a homeless man named Sam, where they’d found only his clothes and shoes


Details | Rhyme | |

Shield Me

Shield me from this stain I bear,
remove this filth and smut I wear.
Cover my eyes from the evil truth,
discard these lies and hide the proof.

Guard my heart, these beats of pain,
from this spattered torn, loveless stain.
Protect this tired, worn out soul,
the one who beats out of control.

Defend my honor, grace and trust,
uncoil these spoils, away we must.
Preserve the mutiny, oust the pure,
coral the innocent with your evil lure.

Safeguard the takers, fakers and rest,
loosen the chains around this chest.
Release my dignity, vanity and control,
please shield my heart and cover me whole.


Details | Iambic Pentameter | |

Death Of A Believer

        DEATH OF A BELIEVER
The death of soul steals slowly through the years
the fog of mind that's never known to be;
brought on by laughter, love, and hate and tears
the fate of all that few can ever see.

It brings the withering of life, and all its leaves,
once green and shining in the morning sun,
now setting on it all, in evening grieves
for lack of interest in what life has done.

Compassion leaves the mind, once fired and prime
and old and tired now beats the heart we knew
life now mundaned by passing of all time,
there's nothing left the heart would like to do.

     Old man, you're numbered to your final breath
      and no one cares for all your sweat and tears,
    your rest is not until it's done in death,
      but keep the faith in what you've done for years.
            © ron wilson


Details | Concrete | |

It was always one-side


I never knew if you ever thought of me
So I kept my feeling to myself so for my own selfish
Reason I could keep you closer toward me.
But without warning you fell for another and easily
My heart was broken,yet and still I carried on with that
Fake smile.Never saying I love you,never telling you my
Growing feeling,before I knew it you left me alone in this
World,yes in this world which was so cold and heartless.
My skin grew cold when I never got to say what was always
On my twisting mind. When I smile I really cried,When I laughed
I really was frowning,When I would look at you looking in you eyes
And knew this was a feeling of disappointment since it been one-sided
Since the first time we meet but now you've gone and left me in a world
Which is so cold only you made it warm enough to go on.
If I only could have told you the truth would you had not been running away?
My heart aches my bones break my head numb,to think I feel in love
with a guy who knew only how to make me cry.Just exactly what I am I?
This was our farewell even if it was all one-sided just telling you now 

I honestly always will love you


This is for the man I loved who feel's for another....and he passed away 09/29/12 saturday....May you rest in peace Saul and come back to me soon


Details | Lyric | |

While You Are Still Mine

I’m living in a world of dreams
A world of fantasy
For all the love you gave
I know, was never meant for me

We lived such different lives
We live a thousand miles apart
But I can’t stop the love I feel
For you…deep in my heart

Everyday I wake and wish
I didn’t feel like this
Everyday I wake and wish
It wasn’t you I miss

Every night I go to sleep
And dream of you and I 
But when I face reality
I know I live a lie

I know I can’t hold onto you
I have to let you go
And knowing this, is hurting 
More than you will ever know

But while you are still mine
I will try to smile, not cry
And treasure every moment
Till it’s time to say goodbye..


Details | Limerick | |

Full Circle

Just out of college, we would yearn for a touch
Sleeping together cuddled on the couch
Those were the days!
Of pre-wedding bouquets
Now I am told to go sleep alone on the couch


Details | Couplet | |

In plain view

Like a rusty old car, in plain view.
Me, unseen by you.


12/22/11
Received 1st place in "YOUR VERSE AGAIN any theme/any form max of 12 lines" contest


Details | Rhyme | |

Two's Magic Nose

Such a nose had Ol’ Blue.
Best in south Missouri... everybody knew.
Could smell a pheasant across the plain.
Could point a covey in a hurricane.
That’s the way the legend goes.
Ol’ Blue had a “magic nose.”
 
As Blue got older, his master’s mind would drift away
To a place where he and young Blue used to play. 
In the mornings, sitting over his coffee cup
He found it sad there were no pups.
He thought it would be such a shame
If the only memory was Ol’ Blue’s name.
 
So, Jim was compelled and full of pride;
He made a search, far and wide,
To find Ol’ Blue a suitable mate.
No doubt, his offspring would be great.
It seemed likely, he supposed,
At least one pup would have his “magic nose.”
 
She was a Champion Miss from New Orleans,
A beautiful “red” named Cajun Queen.
But Blue suddenly passed away, before the pups were born.
Jim was broken hearted.  He and “Queenie” mourned.
Then came the litter, but there was only one.
Jim struggled for hope; after all, he was Ol’ Blue’s son.
 
Dappled and lanky, a handsome little cuss,
He looked just like Blue.  Jim made such a fuss.
Naming this pup would require no ado.
It was obvious.  Officially, he would be “Blue Two.”
Oh yes, these were mighty large tracks to fill.
“Can he?”, folks asked.  Jim would say, “Heck yes he will!”

So his nickname became “Two” and he seemed to be smart.
Soon it was time for his training to start.
The basics went well, but Jim’s outlook grew very dim
When, instead of pointing, Two would wag and jump and bark at him.
Oh, Two seemed to be trying; but try as he might,
He just could not seem to ever get it right.

“Blue’s son or not, he’s got to go!”
Jim found Two a “pet home” far away, in Tupelo.
On his way back, he stopped in Texarkana.
Been too long a time since he’d seen his sister Hannah.
Six days and six pounds later, he was back on his way.
Work at the farm was callin’ and he’d be drivin’ all day.
 
He thought about Ol’ Blue and wondered if and when
He’d ever have a birddog as good as Blue again.
Oh, he knew another “magic nose” was just a far off dream;
After all, it wasn’t something any man could scheme.
A “magic nose” was a gift from God, only given to a few;
And he was proud and very lucky just to have known Ol’ Blue.
 
As he turned into his drive, he broke into a smile.
“Why… I can’t believe it!  It…It must be 300 miles!”
Two was on the porch, thin and dirty; but he struck a handsome pose.
Jim ran and hugged Two hard.  “How’d you get back?  Lord only knows!”
Suddenly Jim realized; and struck with awe, he slowly rose.
A tear trickled to his smile.  “Why Two… you have a “magic nose!”
 
Two and Jim are best of friends, together everywhere.
From milkin’ cows to bedtime, Two is always there.
Jim doesn’t hunt much anymore, now Two’s a rescue dog.
Just last month, he saved a little girl lost in Cooley’s Bog.
Jim struts and tells proud, heroic stories;
While Two wags and jumps and barks, and shares his glory.
 
Jim boasts, “Like father, like son!”, then speaks fondly of Blue;
But all know the largest tracks to fill are those of Two.
His deeds are known far and wide,
And fill Jim’s heart with love and pride.
For with every rescue, the legend grows;
About a dog named Two, and his “magic nose.”


Details | Blank verse | |

Being a gay daughter

Father, I know I bring you shame,
But I just can’t stop myself from speaking her name.
I can’t stop myself from calling her at night,
Checking in, making sure she’s all right.
I know you hate when we hold hands,
How do you expect me to conform to your demands?
Would it be different if it was a boy?
Would you smile and act coy?
Invite him inside,
Instead of making us hide?
I know you don’t like her because she’s a girl,
I know the thought of us together makes you hurl,
But if you would take a moment,
If you let her step into the light,
She might come off as urgent,
But I assure you, when I’m with her, everything feels right. 
Please, father, give her a chance
Just a bit of your time, 
She will save you the last dance, 
She could show you how a diamond shines. 


Details | Light Poetry | |

I'm Walking Away

My Eyes
Seem Cold
You Hurt
Them So
My Hand
You Shook
My First
You Took
My Heart
Discarded
You Vowed
Then Parted
My Soul
Does Hurt
You Smirk
Then Curse 
My Stand
You Shook
My Grasp
You Felt
On Tight
I Held
You Pulled
I Fought
My Neck 
You Caught
My Cross
Did Fall
Within That 
Moment 
   I
Dropped 
The 
Ball
   My Eyes
See Clear
For Pity
You Can't
Put In Them
I'll Shed No
Tears For
Pain I've 
Carried 
Within Them
For There's
Been
Too Much 
Hurt, For
Me To Stay
And My Only
Choice Is
  To 
Walk
Away


Details | Free verse | |

not wearing glasses

I walk through thin veils
of colored light and carefully
tread upon gleaming shards 
of precious glass -
broken and neatly scattered 
upon arctic bathroom tiles.

Each sliver reflects
a single piece of your 
perfect anatomy.
An arm, a leg, an eyeball -
a swollen horizontal speck
perceiving a soloist’s surrender 
outside a witch’s mirror.

I cried your name 
in between
loathsome waves of solitude 
this past weekend -
weightless letters floating 
above my bleeding passion
like starved vultures 
gleaning over carrion.

Did you know the affection 
I’ve smothered you with
these past thirty years 
is beginning to smell 
like dirty nylon socks?
I use them now to 
dampen my bloated eyes.

You're fitly ignorant 
of my extended limbs 
and repressed sorrows.
They covet apparel
not filamented with
fleece and falsities.
Your rehearsed kisses 
are dressed in dull razors -
rendering my lips 
gauged and coarsely 
cracked.

I took a shotgun 
to the nightlight last evening
and prayed as I reached for you 
through strands of tattered muslin.
I was hoping to grasp
a parcel of your fading glint
and humbly touch 
your jagged aura -

I foolishly cut my hands.











Details | Footle | |

First Love,Free Of

*I've read so many amazing poems since my return to Poetry Soup. I've been inspired to try more structured poetry, and explore different types. Here's my first try at a footle.*


Adore
Need more

--Part not
--Heart caught

Time spent
Love lent

--Touch soul
--Feel whole

Wonder lust
No trust.

--Don't go
--Tears flow

You leave
I plead.

--Love lost
--The cost

Awoke
Heart Broke

--I Cry
--Goodbye

First love
Free of.


Details | Lyric | |

To See Her Smile Again

It tears my heart to see my child
So lost, alone and sad
Shattered by her loss
And all the hopes and dreams they had
Knowing she pretends she’s strong
But deep inside she fears
Knowing when she’s all alone
She cries her silent tears
When I hear her laugh
I know it just a fake disguise
When I see her smile
I still see sadness in her eyes
She has no arms to hold her now 
No words of love to hear
No comfort from the love she lost
The man she held so dear
He made her life worth living
Two halves that made a whole
The only man she’ll ever love  
With all her heart and soul
There’s nothing that I wouldn't do  
To take away her pain
To see the girl she used to be
To see her smile again
If I could give him back to her
I’d take his place tomorrow
To see the light shine in her eyes
Instead of pain and sorrow
I know he watches over her
In hope one day he’ll see
The hurt, the pain, the tears she cries
Are just a memory...

For Bree 
xxxx


Details | Prose Poetry | |

Grandad's Missing

There's a void, now
Where once a steadfast heart beat time
The soul in perfect harmony with life's uncertain pulse
With those who clambered eagerly in solace or in joy
To scale that mighty pinnacle
The Rock, within the bosom of the family

There's a void, now
But marvel at the structure, the firmness of the ground beneath
The strata richly layered with wisdom of generations past
A fault free seam constructing firm foundations
Binding those within the bosom of the family

There's a void, now
A hollow cavern 
echoing the anger and the pain
Trust time; it has no fear of finite elements
The source of unremitting pain
Within the bosom of the family

There's a void, now
So fill the emptiness and catalogue the memories
Harvesting the richness of their meaning
The fullness of the seed sown long ago
To bloom forever within the bosom of the family


Details | Free verse | |

How Far Will You Fly

How far will you fly?
Cross continent? Moonward?
Across the room?
When will you depart?
Through which gate?
Let me fly with you.
You won't even notice me,
On the wing,
Clinging for life (and love).
Why do you flee me,
choosing a destination
from which it will be
impossible
to book a return?


Details | Rhyme | |

Not Sofa King Cool


          A
College Dorm sleeps
Four per room
Keg party 
Loud
Too much Boom

           A
Drunk freshman sleeps
Where he falls
Coeds toss him on 
The sofa 
Instead of snooze in
the halls

            A 
Sorority girl 
Named him  
“Sofa King Tool”
Now he feels like a Fool
Not Sofa King Cool


Details | Light Poetry | |

Tomorrow

We don’t know what tomorrow brings
So we just can’t speculate
And it will make no sense
For us to just sit down and wait

The love we found today
We both know it’s real and true
All love with face some obstacles’
But love will always make it through

Some people will try to hold back
What they are feeling in their heart
When they know this love is a fairy tale
Romance Right from the very start

We are worrying about the future
Bout the unknown is like a blank page
But god can close the curtains anytime
Down on any one’s stage

I know a man who loves woman
He falls for her heart and soul
And his parents says it’s crazy
He’s too young and she’s too old

So they stop them from getting marry
Causing years of pain and sorrow
While driving he got in accident today
And they will bury him tomorrow

And the wound in her heart won’t stop bleeding
And every breathe she wish was the last she take
A little boy calls his dad, saying look, look ,dad
And they found her body floating in the lake

His parents was worried bout the future
Although they know it was unknown
But still they plant the seeds of pain
Now look what it has grown

Why didn’t they let them be together?
For today all that remains is sorrow
For trying to change the course of true love
They have taken away their tomorrow

For today they would have been married
And build a happy home of love
But now they are two lost souls
Forever roaming the world above

Some times one year of happiness
Is worth 100 years of being alone
For as long as two hearts are true
Forever the flowers of love will bloom

And as long as there are stars in the sky
And the waves must come to the shore
People of all different ages
Will be falling in love forever more

But what if tomorrow never comes
And you let today go
Then the real magic of true love
You will never get to know


Details | Free verse | |

Heartbreak

He wants to say "I love you,"
But keeps it to "Goodnight."
Because love would mean some falling,
and she's afraid of heights.

T.K


Details | Lyric | |

ONLY MINE

Don't be confused, I'll tell ya what I see
The girl in your mirror, she's the girl for me
Your drowning in doubt, gonna help ya out
Not pushing ya down, just turning ya around
So you can clearly see, who I want to be
Your man.. Oh girl, I want ya alive and free
I love to see you on fire, my only desire
Forbidden says who, girl don't be so blue
Only thing we're destroying here is fear
So jump in baby, the water is so fine
Drown in my arms, be only mine, only mine

Be only mine..
Only mine!

Date: 9-11-14


Details | Free verse | |

The Runner

If ever a frailty should be rued,
then my emotional resistance of
those who hold my affection dearest
to them, is the sin that equates my soul
with the essence of a Hitler, and condemns
my name to the highest degree of infamy,
While my heart longs to be understood, my
fear of abandonment dictates my legs to gain
distance as each loving gesture is offered in
repetition, Persistently they reach, only to be
disregarded, and embody me within my shame,

Friends and family alike, endure the coldness
of my introverted haven, staring into my eyes
in hopes of disconfirming the projected emptiness
that flows from actions, words, or lack of both,
As they hurt from me, I scream for them in silence,
A deafening continuous stream of soundlessness,
that elevates my withheld pain from ache to harrowing,
Yet they can only assume the contents of this confession,
For my words go directly from mind to paper, and 
never see the eyes of those who need to know this tenderness,

To express such powerful statements and risk the familiar
sting of neglect or abandonment once more, is a fear that
surpasses every shameful tear, haunting my thoughts as
a reminder that lives on insomnia, thus I remain devoted 
to a faithful vow of solidarity that keeps me sane and sheltered,
Moving at a constant pace, racing against my own fright, holding
every term or phrase of endearment within, and running from a
past that will not be relived by my decree, Alas, with mortal lungs,
 mechanical legs, and a heart that lies somewhere between the two, 
I run,
for and from, 
the feeling I desire most....


Details | Lyric | |

Your Betrayal

I wish that I' had ESP, I would have known right from the start
The things that I found out too late, that finally pulled us apart
What I found out too late, that I should have heard from you
There was another in your life and she had been there from the start
All the times that we'd been out since that night that we had met
I did not have a clue that there was someone else in your life
Finally, I found out for myself, that put a knife right in my heart
I found this woman's name was Anne and in fact, she was your wife

I felt that I could trust you then, I was so sure that I was right
You made me feel good about myself and made everything seem bright
You always knew what to say, the words you used were very nice
You had a way of doing things that always turned out right
We had rides out to the country, and went out to the County Fair
I felt that you had fallen for me,and that you really cared
Until the day came along when you caused me so much pain
A day that I never want to be repeated in my life again

If I could get back at you for all the pain that you have caused
I would be so happy that I could again start to enjoy my life
The way that I should have lived it, without all this pain and strife 
You could have saved me so much pain, if you had said you had a wife
Now I have found a way to erase the pain that you have caused
Because love found me and showed me how to love again once more
I can't wait now to start again in this new and exciting life.
A man has just proposed to me and asked me"will you be my wife?"

This proves to me there always is a way to turn things all around
That gives you back the will to live again and purpose in your life
When you've almost given up on life and things really get you down
You feel that there is no more fun in life for you that can be found
So everyday now, try to change the thoughts that you had before
Give yourself a chance to let love again come through your door
One day soon,someone you'll see will again bring love to your life
They will take you by the hand and ask you to be their wife.


Details | Rhyme | |

HEART OF STONE

frozen heart of stone
once vibrant, now alone
love's flown..

*Ten Word Poem

Sponsor: Poet Destroyer A K A Linda
Contest Name: A poem you have not entered in a poetry soup contest #3 
Date: 5-14-14


Details | Rhyme | |

Get out of my Heart

I lay, dripping, soaked within a dark sweat,
seeing and hearing your soft voice abet.
I want to run, to leave this merciless realm,
but you pull me closer, without a choice at helm.
Get out of my dreams.

I miss you, but I hate you, every last memory.
You taunt my every being, you’re all that I see.
I see you in the crowds, or when I’m all alone.
You’re here and there, on your heartless throne.
Why couldn’t you stay?
Get out of my life.

I hear your laughter and see your beautiful smile.
Once so beautiful, now helping others with guile.
You’re now decayed, withering into shallow dust.
I loved you so much, and never again will I trust.
Get out of my head.

Tears I weep, when others aren’t around to see –
I remember the days, the months and years I bleed.
I try to forget, and to hate you and your choices.
But all I can hear are these damn forgiving voices.
Maybe I am what you proclaim me to be.
Was I really that monster, that demon you see?
I hate what I love and love what I hate.
I try to erase our past, and to claim it our fate.
But I can’t let go, you’re all that I hear and see.
I wished you could have loved, that loathsome “me”.
Get out of my heart.


Details | Chant Royal | |

Black

I am homeward bound
Lusty thoughts, for the love I miss
It’s a surprise, I am coming ‘round
I’m expected two days beyond this
Being away, day after day, left a hole
Being away, hollowed my soul
I rush towards your embrace
Already I envision smile, upon your face
Desire I now attack
My heart, with I, on highway race
Your gleam of eye twinkles, inside this nights black



Years of unity, love’s solid, sound
Closer, skittish, nervousness
The home stretch, I’ve now found
I accelerate, craving caress
Home in sight, on I roll
With thoughts of my angel, asleep sole
With her in bed, only emptiness occupies my space
I will fill that void and hold her grace
Never again will our love lack
My minds quarrel and love erase
I arrive home, it’s silent, black



I climb the stairs, feet create no sound
As you sleep, your lips, I will kiss
A greater beauty walks not, on these grounds
Creak open the master door, sudden distress
A stranger lies, my loves heart, stole
Pain takes my mind, to the gallows pole
Stunned by the disgrace
Instant horror, rage, I cannot replace
A mans breath crawls my baby’s back
My love and my girl I debase
My world fades to black



My breath vanishes, my pain makes no sound
I beg for a why? This has come of my happiness
Pain in my chest, built a mound
I will avenge this
My eyes, my mind, my heart, are now coal
Two lives for taking become my goal
Three counting me, these lives come waste
No control, rage in haste
This grief will not retract
This sinister situation, I will level at face
All good, has gone black


My emotions, stresses, compound
Creation of plan, slick aggressiveness
I muffle my screams, my conscience drowned
Satan shows face, he wouldn’t miss this
I, no longer in control
Heed order from the devil
Quickly, I spin about face
My entry steps, I then retrace
A fetch of gasoline before I turn back
Fire shall consume their sleeping space
Delighting evils’ mind of black


She sleeps at peace, under satin sheets, negligée of lace
But peace is ’bout to be replaced
A match stick comes alive, with a crack
Gasoline tossed, upon your lips, in sleep you taste
Match tossed, flames dance and light the black


Details | Rhyme | |

Just Another Ballet

It’s only ever games with you
each time we meet, more matches
and all I have to show for them
are these bandages and scratches.
Indications of the damage done
but only if you’re looking closely,
can you see just how far they spread?
Cuz I keep them hidden mostly.
Is it shame for what I have let you do?
Or fear that I am beginning to like 
everything that you are doing
Each time you make a strike.
At night I batter myself for this show
that I am letting us put on each day
it’s all a dangerous game to partake in,
one misstep to ruin this harrowing ballet.
For I have broken all of these bones before
and still played all throughout the nights.
So now every time you toss me up I recall
how you forced me to my fear of heights,
for so easy is the fall back down 
that even you can be caught unprepared.
So when I am free falling back to the ground
you find that you are likewise impaired 
and I’ll leave with another cut, another bandage
another scar, one more broken bone or bruise
and I’ll ask those questions that have no answer,
repeat the words that are tired from how you abuse.
And I know that all of this is just another game,
but still I partake in our ballet. I take my place,
I re-tie the bandages and hide the scars,
I’ll get over my fear of those heights; embrace
the space between the stars and earth that
welcomes me when I come to visit where
no mortals may tread for long out of fear 
that the descent will be filled with despair.


Details | I do not know? | |

Our Abandoned Theme Park

When we first met here, it didn’t have such a dead feeling like it does now. This place used to have a soul, it used to be alive. Now it stands alone like a nameless grave. Forgotten and empty. Isn’t it funny? A place that once made me so happy, now feels like I’m walking into an angry cellmate’s prison cell, waiting to get shanked in the heart repeatedly. I walk past what used to be our favorite wooden roller coaster which is now rundown and rusty. It’s in shambles; parts of it are not even intact. The broken half of the wooden roller coaster looks as if it’s trying to reach out to the other piece that has fallen apart to become connected and complete again, but the overgrown vines keep them apart. I finally stop walking to look up to admire what has become of this thing that now reminds me of a torture device from a scene from the movie Saw. Just as I thought, looks worse than it did before and each day it begins to look more and more like an old woman who needs help standing up.  As I stand here my mind begins to play tricks on me. My focus is now shifted from the wooden roller coaster to ground level of the vacant theme park.  From a distance I see him and I laughing together, looking at each other as if that was exactly where we wanted to be and nowhere else. Then my mind starts to flicker the scene on and off like a light bulb, kind of teasing me saying “now you see it, now you don’t.” When my mind does this, I know what’s going to happen next. This scene that I’m watching from afar will soon be put into my imaginary basement of haunting memories for me to save for another dreary walk in our now least favorite theme park.


Details | Free verse | |

We Were Drunk Once

Movies played but seldom watched
As we entangled on the couch
Intoxicated by each other, we drank wine to clear our heads
Things were simple in those times

You were red-eyed and freshly mangled
I wanted so badly to make you smile and forget her
For a time I think I succeeded 
We were blissful in our distraction
Playing grown up as we discovered each other

Long nights where sleeping was forsaken
We preferred to lie intertwined 
Talking 
Smiling
Laughing
The sun would rise and you would leave, reveling in how the hours had escaped us
Smiling at the pink tinged sky
Only to repeat the process nightly

Then we traded places
I am the red-eyed one, and another tries to help me forget you
Sometimes he succeeds
Perspective feels like a cruel joke
Could have
Would have
Should have

Someday he will have red eyes too
A cycle perpetuated


Details | Monorhyme | |

Vanity

 
In the beginning Love proved concept is vain Extenuating circumstances of concepts are vain, Truth proved love, the same, not to be vain, Manifesting truth as a body in essence vain, That love and its truth be in essence not vain, Love’s hope was that truth would not remain vain, Returning true essence to Loves peace again, In marriage of twain to void the void of vain, Vanity of vanity, in eternity, it is quite vain, The truth did live even in the void body of vain, Abram found truth even in the void of his vain, Noah proved truth in sight of humanity quite vain, These men proved death’s message void and vain, In twain, death providence proves that void is vain, As Love repented of His truth buried in flesh vain, Precept proved truth in the concept of a void vain, Living of the flesh, no eternity stash, it is in vain, Truth is in simplicity, complex concepts are vain… …Selah!


Details | I do not know? | |

Crying Tree

Crying tree, stand tall and still
limbs reach in consoling embrace 
silver stars of glistening tears
smooth cobalt face above to wander.

Crying tree, hear my thoughts
listen with stoic indifference
feel my soul-enveloping sadness
and depth of acute loneliness.

Crying tree, hold me close
My love is lost to me
souls no longer bound 
moon once given, returned

Crying tree, oh voiceless one
lead me to the path of right
I rest my weary head on thee
feel warmth in tears I shed.

Crying tree, my only friend
feeling solace in your arms 
fleeting breeze begets rustling leaves
swaying forms gentle caress.

Crying tree, take my gratitude
warm hand upon my shoulder rests
brush away streams of tears 
my love to me returns.

Crying tree, everlasting friend
we will share time again
stand before me in witness
this tree to whom I cry. 


Details | I do not know? | |

CHALLENGE

Day and night,
I think about the truth,
Behind those hidden curtains,
Trying hard to understand,
How He thinks and do things,
Why is that that our mind so small,
Its hard for us to think beyond? 
Why did He made everything complicated for us?

I sat down my dad called,
To make me face the reality,
My heart started beating fast,
And tears run down my cheeks,
As if there was hail,
I didn't know what to say,
He told me he might not last long,
How am I going to see him?
He is on the other-side of the world?
I am worried about him,
I wish I could die with the people who I love,
I am scared to loose them
And the hard part is I dont know my dad,
I miss him!

I feel like time is close by,
And I didn't live my life as if I wish to,
I can't because things are not the same,
When I see an apple on the tree,
It feels like blood dropping beside my eyes,
I feel strange in this world,
I don't think or see the things I used to,
I stand amongst people who are changed,
In a bad way and yet the worst hasn't begun!

I can't even write my poems the same,
I can't make it rhyme anymore,
I feel like I am all alone in this,
I feel like this is a big challenge,
And I am lost in middle of no where,
I feel like nobody understands,
When the words come out my mouth,
All they hear is bluh! bluh! bluh!
I am disparate to find someone who I can talk to,
Yet I am scared to trust anybody,
I been hurt so many times,

I dont even know how to end this poem if you called it,
I have so much anger that is in me,
That no matter what I say there is still more,
That will never end,
One thing I know is I hate to be here,
And live in a place full of strangers, selfish liars, and untrusted people!


Details | Quatrain | |

A heartfelt ride

My heart is on the ride, bouncing
Upon a masterpiece of art
Painted by His hand, taunting
Stroking brush across the canvas.

In the pursuit of a vision
He attempts to bring it to life
With His expert hand in motion
At time forceful, other times light.

He takes my heart upon a flight
Above a magnificent land
The measure of His love to light
The walls of its chambers, His plan.

Yet to ride the land He designs
Takes it through valleys and steep hills
Upon a thorny path hard to climb
But along with the song of two whippoorwills.

If not for the grace of seeing
The beauty of His will while it flew
It would have given up its beating
With the pain found in coming true.

By CarolineCécile
Copyright © 05.14.11


Details | Free verse | |

send him down, let justice be done

"send him down" LET JUSTICE BE DONE.
 
"send him down "spoke the head of talking wool.
the victims crowd cheering at a volume suitable to fit the crime.
the judge looks lost with his last boom of the gavel.
another day,another life lost to life.
but life don't mean ten years or more.
he's done two on remand,and will be free in five more.
life don't mean love no more.
the rich fly the sky's as the poor share the floor.
 
 
"we'll appeal and repeal"said the barristers stare.
matched timidly back by the broken man's glare.
the crime he'd comited was to want to survive.
he fought his attackers and paid with two lives.
should he have laid still there and died?
and had he died there and laid.
would justice have come and made his child less afraid?
would confusion have gone up in smoke with the blame?
 
"we love you and miss you"read the letter of volumes.
the solicitors are writing through a red taped army.
here are some kisses from us all for you to consume.
your name will be upheld and no longer tarnished.
we love you old fool like the wind loves the rain.
like the birds and the sun, we'll rise together again.
untill that day dawns let hope be your sun.
send him back up,LET JUSTICE BE DONE.
 
 


Details | Haiku | |

Fallen Angels

Even together
Fallen Angels you and me
feel so lonely now


Details | Questionku | |

Is Love A Choice,Or A Mercy

Is Love A Choice,Or A Mercy?

Love unbosomed
Sweet joys seamless
Does 'Reality'frown?

Torments over,
We are our answers
Do we not have a choice?


Details | Elegy | |

listless

Soft rain
Leaves shake
Worry fades
but sleep escapes
thoughts prowl
Dream awake
her face only
my mind quakes
close my eyes
Toss and sigh
What night
reveals
the  sun will hide


Details | Ballad | |

It Hurts To Say Goodbye

Every time I leave you, 
It hurts more than I can say
When we say goodbye
Every time I fly away

Every time I leave you
The man I so adore 
The pain I feel goes deeper
And I cry a little more

Every day I wonder if
You ever will be free
Every day I wonder
Will you ever be with me

Every night I cry
Because of leaving you behind
Every tear that falls
The fear of doubt invades my mind

The tears I cry keep coming
Till I’m drowning in the flood
Every day my heart bleeds
But you just don’t see the blood

You're the closest thing to heaven
I will ever be
Please don’t make this love we have
Into a memory

While I'm here remember me
In every song you sing
While you’re there remember me
With all the love I bring

And I will pray next time I fly
To you across the sky
I won’t leave there without you
I won’t have to say goodbye..


Details | I do not know? | |

The Broken Puzzle Piece

Your strength was my weakness

Your heart was like my home

Your love was mine to keep

But now I'm so alone

I thought this was for the best

Atleast that's what you said

My heart just seems so broken

Its almost like I'm dead

I've gotten so lost and confused

I feel kind of twisted and abused

It's like my feelings are a letter left unread

You would'nt take the time

You said you didn't care

But throughout it all I was still there

I guess it's time to let go

I guess it's something we will never know

The words left unsaid will be kept with us until we're dead

Heres my last goodbye

I cannot stick around while you watch my heart die.


Details | I do not know? | |

You Let Me Down

I waited every day

Hoping to see your face,

But I never saw it again.



You were supposed to

Be there for me, you were

Supposed to love me.



Momma, what did I

Do wrong? Why didn't

You love me anymore?



You left me with strangers,

Walked away from me

When I needed you to stay.



You let me down

In the worst possible way,

It hurt so much.



Even now my beating heart

Still breaks when I think

Back on those days.



Those days when I waited

To see your face just one

More time but never did.



Those days when I wished

You were her, hugging me,

Telling me she loved me.



But it's over now and I'm

Doing okay, I swear that

I will never be just like you.



You who chose her drugs

And alcohol over the one

Thing you should've chosen.



But it's too late for regrets,

And it's funny, after all this

Time, I can't seem to hate you...


Details | I do not know? | |

From Then To Now

Hand in hand we walked 
together into Reception
Nothing could stop us and 
together we were three
James and I LARP-ed Doctor 
Who for fun
We talked and laughed for 
hours
Because no stress was in our 
way
Anna and I smiled and laughed
And jumped on our bouncy 
castle
With nothing dividing us.

Side by side we walked 
together into Year 6
Some stranger stopped them to 
talk and broken we were alone
James and I talked about 
Doctor Who for fun
And we talked and kissed for 
hours
But misunderstanding broke us 
up
Anna and I still smiled and 
laughed
And joked about our bouncy 
castle
But secondary school was going 
to divide us.

With no one there I walked 
alone into Year 7
And a stranger became my 
friend and together we were 
two
Violet and I both loved Doctor 
Who
And James found Dominic
So James and I talked for mere 
minutes
And school started pulling us 
apart
Anna and I still laughed and 
smiled
Still promising to be friends 
Never letting it divide us

Suffocating and drowning I 
walked into Year 9
Hating how I was and feeling 
alone
Katie and Chloe were so pretty
And Violet so funny and all 
were better than me
James and I hardly talked or 
saw each other
But we still made the most of 
our friendship
As we were like family, stress 
couldn’t break us apart
Anna and I laughed but I did 
not smile genuinely
Because the bouncy castle was 
long gone
And our schools were beginning 
to divide us

Dead yet breathing I stand 
right now
And I hate who am I and every 
single detail
Fights broke us up and pulled 
us apart
So I can feel Katie, Violet and 
Chloe
Falling further out my reach
James moved house to a place 
unknown
And blamed me for never 
talking to him
But really it was because of my 
ex who was a girl
It was for something beyond 
my control
Anna and I were still friends; 
only by a thread
As she did not know about me
And how school broke me apart

So this is me now; I’m all alone
No longer the smiling young girl 
of reception
The only person talking to me 
is me
And the voice in side my head
You see; they all left me and 
always will
So now the only call I answer
Is that of my blades
And the darkness
That is constantly
Pulling me
Down


Details | Prose Poetry | |

Mort De La Mort, The Death Of Death

There is something intoxicating about the absolute stillness of night
I am most at home, at ease, the tell-tale heart of a vampire
Indeed, I have never been anything but, born into this life a demon
Spawned into this life by hate and resentment

I have fed upon everyone I have ever known, everyone I can ever remember
All that was human in those around me, seldom have I not destroyed

I have been merciless, I have been death

 

Tonight, the hunter becomes the hunted and who would have known it
Magnificent a creature, a natural born killer, meeting her bloody demise

What was a heart of stone has now started beating to the sound of human dreams

I can only thirst for one thing, with satisfaction impossible elsewhere

Him, my reaper donned in perfect flesh
A powerful being that has broken me so entirely, I have been forced into mortality
I am a mere shadow of the monster I used to be

 

The tragedy that is seeing life with the hearts eyes, I offer myself to him completely.

I will not move, I will not run and I will not hide

Tear me to pieces like I have torn all I have ever encountered, I yearn for it

Every cell in my body begs for our final dance, the Waltz to my own demise
Now, to look upon you would be worth a thousand deaths, and I invite them all
Find me, take me, end me.
I will rest in the memory of your flawless face for eternity, as hell welcomes me with
open arms.


Details | I do not know? | |

Life Without Him

A woman cannot control her heart,
Who she loves can tear her apart,
without a clue of what he does,
when he's a rebel without a cause.

I've roped myself a hurricane, 
His heart the only thing I've tamed,
And off to prison once again,
My crying heart goes off with him.

The pain I feel as he goes away,
Will bide with me throughout my days,
My nights in lonely solitude,
As I pray to the Lord I'll make it through.


Details | Rhyme | |

No-one Ever Stays For Long

Fragile joy suddenly smashed,
Shock predictable attack,
Little fragments raining down,
Cutting at me deeper now,
All of you are just the same,
How much more can one heart take?
Straining underneath the lies,
One more way to make me cry,
Disappointment yet again,
Just give up and let you play,
Let me down and tear me up,
Use me 'til you've had enough,
Pass me round, then forget me,
Just the same. You'll regret me.

No-one ever stays for long.
No-one ever stays for long.


Details | Senryu | |

A blow to the heart

She crys out in pain
No one there to comfort her
She suffers alone


By: Misty Leccese
© June 17, 2009


Details | Rhyme | |

Fears I can't Quell

I lied when I said it was easy,
There are so many things that I fear;
Just thinking of them makes me queasy,
I’m waiting for them to appear;

Could it be we’re temporary,
Is our love enough to last;
Will he think I’m ordinary,
When so much time has passed;

The day that he betrays me,
The day he says goodbye;
All of the things that could be,
Make me want to cry;

How do I quell my many fears,
I don’t know what to do;
Cause I only have so many tears,
That I can spend on you.


Details | Sapphic stanza | |

tied

Falling in the beauty of graceful silence,
wanting but the echo of lover's glory,
mourning for the death of the passing hours
                  under this darkness...


Details | Imagism | |

TO THE HEART

Heart...
I feel you beating thready and weak..
I feel you murmuring me to stop..
I feel you throbbing softly aghast..

Heart...
Why did we trust and give in so fast?
We should have guessed things doesn't last..
We should have been careful for things casts..

Heart...
Will you get some more little rest..
So long, I do not like you again be on test..
I do not like you more on mess...

Heart...
Follow me, I'm above you..
I know which one is better for you..
I learned from past and present blues..
Indeed, I'm knowledgeable enough for the cues..

Heart..
I speak kindly to you..
Kindly mind me once..
This the mind pleading and speaking...

By: olive_eloi
sept. 16, 2013
4:48pm


Details | Free verse | |

My Endless Longing -A Mother's Love

                                                                **~**

My heart is fierce in its longing for you
 With thoughts that mimic flitting butterflies
Like stars chasing the moon in the black velvet night
And every time I close my eyes…
It is you whose face I see
I ache from deep within my soul
Wanting to feel my fingertips trace the soft texture of your skin
Run my fingers through your soft, chocolate hair
Longing to see your smile - beaming radiant like diamonds in the sky


Lying in my bed at night the fingers of darknes touch my skin
The moon quietly tiptoes through my window
As silent witness to my bleeding heart
Closing my eyes…
Brings your image closer to my mind
For you... are a violet glistening with dew to my longing heart
An angel - in a spider's land
Where they deceitfully weave their web of lies
Unwillingly... turning your heart against me...
The mother who loves you so                                      

I drift away into a restless sleep dreaming of you- my girl  
As the early morning sun creeps through my window
I awake... with a heart that breaks all over again
I am a prisoner held captive by my love for you
My precious, little porcelain girl

My love for you will never end
I pray for strength to see us through
For someday we will win this battle
And the love we share...
Will lovingly come shining through

                                                             **~~**

 


Details | Ballad | |

Starcrossed Tragedy

A Silent Night's Hunt for a Tigress so blunt, Left the Fiend dancing with my Thisbe's Cloack But where was She? Her Drenching blood is all I can see The Night of Sanguine, The Night of Rapture, Tonight was meant to be All Behold This Tragedy ran by Dark Energy, My Lost Lover's Plea A seed of what is to come, In this starcrossed Tragedy, For I can not live without you, My Pyramus, All I need, My reason to Breathe One sight of me bleeding away from reality, started this tragedy and with me It shall Grow The Pain wasn't enough for me, To Live on with me Love without consequence, The Damned Saint, The Angelic Demon The Darkness of the Sea, Carries away with me, In this Starcrossed Tragedy A Star traveling across the moonless Night Sky, In the mid-summer of Verona, Fell from her glorious light, I have lost my guide, My need for Life Every balcony I'll climb for you, Just to Caress you once more But now it is too Late, My Juilet Let the Poison Fill me My Body dyed In silence, Dipped in Paralysis, Forging the Will of God, Feigning the Clutches of Death, My Romeo I prithee to you, See past The Illusion, Caught in the Webs of Love's delusion A Dagger reached my heart once To see you martyr for our love A Dagger reached my heart twice The Pain wasn't enough for me, To Live on with me Love without consequence, The Damned Saint, The Angelic Demon The Darkness of the Sea, Carries away with me, In this Starcrossed Tragedy Once the Morning Retired from her weeping The sun shined into her eyes, then his Lifeless, their dream will live on Every Petal will be Avenged The Pain wasn't enough for me, To Live on with me Love without consequence, The Damned Saint, The Angelic Demon The Darkness of the Sea, Carries away with me, In this Starcrossed Tragedy


Details | Free verse | |

You're In My Laundry Room ;)

You quote a man not known but known to everyone when speaking to me
You still are my favorite one to dream about

I choose my words carefully when talking to you
Constructed forums for self doubt surround my delusional landscape
So do consider this an ode to you and your false perfection

I climb all the ladders in reverse when trying to reach you
O'er freezing waters and under painful thoughts
Around you is agnostic heaven

You are a graceful angel and i am your charmless flipper baby tourette baring sappy tap
danced party joke :/

smile...i like it


Details | Free verse | |

My Heart on a String.

My heart is waiting for the day, 
when you choose her over me. 

It knows it's going to fall,
                          
                                     crash,

                                               break, 

                                                          and 

                                                                 shatter. 


Even on this soft carpet floor. 


Details | Rhyme | |

If We Never Meet Again

If we never meet again,
If I never get to see those eyes,
Full of a land of laughs and lies,
Then darling, I'd just like to say,
Thank you for melting my troubles away,
Even though you turned your back on me,
Leaving me cold and shivery.

You were a fascinating creature;
My one redeeming feature,
You gave me little satisfaction,
But that was part of the attraction,
And if it takes forever
I will learn to leave you behind,
Out of sight and out of mind,
It's going to take a long long time
To replace my partner in crime,
Who else would dare to risk it all
To intervene and break my fall?
Just like I did for you before,
But you won't let me anymore.

So before we go our separate ways,
Let me take one last look at your face,
For whatever happens once we part,
The world can't wash you from my heart.


Details | Ballad | |

I Miss You

I know how lost and lonely
Your  world was for a while
Your eyes so sad and empty
Your face without a smile

Your world so out of focus
Set you walking the wrong street
And always I’d be there
To wipe the tears of each defeat

But never did I give up hope
I always knew we’d win
I knew with me beside you
Once again your soul would sing

For you were still the son I loved
Who’d brought me so much joy
You were still a part of me
You were still my boy

And with your strength and dignity
You washed away the pain
Rebuilding all your hopes and dreams
You learned to smile again

And with that smile upon your face
And new found peace of mind
With fun and laughter in your heart
You left this world behind

I feel an endless ache inside
I feel so incomplete
For losing you it means
I've lost the biggest part of me

Forever I will miss the laughs
Our talks, your smiling face
Forever I will miss the son
I never can replace

It’s hard to let you go
Because we never said goodbye
Now you’re an Angel in God’s Heaven
High above the sky

But sometimes when I'm all alone
And feel all hope is gone
I seem to hear you whisper
"Mum just smile, and carry on"


By Raina Hutchins




Details | Free verse | |

Love Thing

She will not say she was Predator.
She knows she was
(She has that throbbing memory to
remind her)
But it's in her intuition,
Her breath (her life)
To be Victim.
Let her play the part.

"It was like a game of chess
Against myself and I;
I won
And thus I lost-

We met by fate
Intertwined by what we loved
The ice gradually cracked and broke
And I wanted his flesh on mine,
His breath on mine
But he wanted me wholeheartedly.
ME!

But I was too torn
I am torn to pieces.

Yet I consented knowing...
Knowing...
I will break everything
So long as I'm broken
And without action,
Without thought,
He was made broken
And now he breaks everything.
A pestilent sick that penetrates.
How was I supposed to know he would grow ill?"

Now nod.
Smile until your jaw cracks,
Else she'll bicker
Til you do.
Don't show signs that you tracked her lie
But show pity...
She doesn't deserve pity
But smile with pity
Pity that the b**** lied to you.

That she deserves.


Details | Lyric | |

Down In Memphis

This poem came about by a discussion at work describing a memphis burger and a classic one. I told someone they flowed together and they didn't believe me so I wrote this:

I went down to memphis
There was this, classic chick
With them hips, and red lipstick
A kiss so delicious that
I promised to this miss I would not dissapear
But I was dishonest, I thought I made it clear
That this situation between the two of us
Was not serious But she was delrious
Became so furious that
That month she had two periods
It only takes one to end my sentence
25 to life, Im not doin the time on that sentence
Doesn't matter if she gets me presents
Don't care if she gets madder that I am not present, 
yet she gets sadder cause she still feels my presence
It wont be pleasant, if she doesnt let me leave peacefully
So I packed my things in the middle of the night
Took off asap so she couldn't pick a fight
Flew right back to my little house on the right
Split so fast like Kim Kardash was my wife
Realized that I just dodged a couple of knifes
It seems whack, But I just had to run and hide
This commital thing isnt for me
I am brittle, I crack too easily
Got to be careful cause I need Room to wiggle cant be
Strangled or tied down, I know It'll come back around
Hurt triple the times when karma
Shoots me down from the sky
So for right now, sayonara, beddy bye
Nice to know ya, good night


Details | Lyric | |

One More Day

Daylight slips away
Another lonely night descends
The darkness that surrounds me
My one and only friend
At times I wonder who I am
Why I'm so alone
A world without the man I love
A world to me unknown
I thought I could survive the pain
I thought I could be strong
My fragile heart so broken
My fragile strength all gone
All my hopes are lost
My dreams are washed into the sea
There is no point to life 
Without the world of you and me
I put my hands together
Then on my knees I pray
"Please God give him back to me
Just for one more day
I need to hold him once again
Before I let him go
To say I love him one more time
I need for him to know"
I’d rather go through any pain  
Than what death puts you through
I’d rather sleep forever more 
Than wake up missing you..


Details | Rhyme | |

Relocation Blues

Moved everything here to be with you, What more did you want me to do, Let my job go so I could be in your world, Then my settled life became unfurled, These eyes watch you turn my world to an end, These arms long to hold you again, But hurtin’s on me yeah, so what can I say, You’re a rich girl and you’ve gone too far cuz you know it don’t matter anyway. Oh I’ve seen fire and I’ve seen rain, I’ve seen sunny days that I thought would never end, I’ve seen lonely times when I could not find a friend, But I always thought that i’d see you again. Should I stay or should I go... American woman get away from me, American woman mama let me be, Don’t come hanging around my door, Don’t want to see your face no more, Coloured lights can hypnotize Sparkle someone else’s eyes So country road take me home, to the place where I belong, Back to my homeland, all alone, singing my own song. Written September 28, 2011 Includes the following songs; These Eyes Rich Girl Fire and Rain Should I Stay or Should I Go American Woman Country road
Written for Contest"Sing a Song for Me" Won 2nd Place


Details | Didactic | |

Church Picnic

          CHURCH PICNIC
There was no time, now was forever,
he said I love you, she believed him,
at seventeen they had to love and run.
Under cottonwoods the world was theirs
while the river kept on crying by,
and she never guessed it might be more than fun.

Her daddy was a Baptist preacher
he'd keep his little girl, if he could reach her,
but seventeen and picnics--life moves on;
and a girl shows her virginity
to the alderman who needs to see,
and the serpant in the garden waves it's tongue.

Her lavender was still a blessing,
She whispered words of her confessing,
he laid her down to to save  her in his eyes,
under the cottonwoods, the need to cry
came too late for her to wonder why,
while her Daddy preacher man got ready to baptize.


Details | Rhyme | |

Reminiscing

Staring blankly through the frosted window pane,
reminiscing about the past all jumbled in your brain.
Memories shaded by the utter sadness in your heart.
A lover who left though you thought he would never part.
A springtime love affair straight from a movie screen,
romance everlasting in your heart or so it seemed.
Forever the dreamer, even now you truly believe
that your lover will return to you before New Year’s Eve.


Details | Dramatic monologue | |

What Is The Reason

What is the point
When dark is dark
And light is day

What is the reason
To sit down to write
With little to say

When you were here
Thoughts had all hope
With little to pay

All that was good
Had left me and should
A middle tone gray

But black is black
And now I can see
I'm headed that way


Details | Rhyme | |

NP--NOISE OF PAIN


NP- NOISE OF PAIN


curse and scream from your lungs slap me with words like I am a rag throw the venom while kids hear the pangs kicking my heart sucked in torn paper bag this is the noise of agony stabbed I’m no longer a victim under your spell that sweet voice I had once loved drives me to walk out from your sharp shell (c) Susan Burch's Contest: Offensive Odors/ Noise Polllution


Details | Ballad | |

Corpse Bride

The braeþ of lyf -- I've Learned to fear
Though, ta'en it was, so long sinsyne
I've wroot my song of skreighs
He tore the lyf out of me
In sooth did she speke this to me - Cassandra was she to me
Wistful - I am no bride to be
Wistful - is this soliloquy of skreighs

I cede to thee, deathly colleen 
Though remains - façades of humanity 
Angel kind - wicce of my welkin dreams
Casted by the lote of she
Ta'en the hollow Herefro way - ne'er!
Caught with twain
W'ie or swain

Angel dearest so fair - love does not share
Seemed a crux, when eath is lone
I rose for thee - cede all of thy love to me
Or was this not meant to be
Eros's deceit 
So wistful - corpse bride I remain to be


Details | Rhyme | |

What You Cannot Say


With every I love you i see the pain reflected in your eyes.
So you cast aside your heart while your real passion
dies.

I love what I should not have and in my
arms I feel your regret.
As it kills me to say darlin.
Sometimes in are happiness we have to cast aside
others and forget.

I see it as clearly as the fading day.
So I sacrifice my heart.
For I know what you cannot say.

You cant care when you could love.
Take no caution.
In this life just take wing as gentle as the dove.

If only it were me so do i wish without a lie.
Your happines has begun.
were this love does die.

I will not have you know the cold
that comes with me.
I give you the strongest act of love.
Happiness for you I wish alone in my misery.

Your tearfull eyes show your true beauthy
For with me happiness will never stay.
Wash thoose regrets for darlin I understand 
what you cannot say.


Details | I do not know? | |

The Petty Posh-WahZee - Liberation and Ostentation



The Petty Posh-Wahzee - Liberation & Ostentation


The Not-So Distant Past:

The fallen fighters for freedom, are unable to turn in their graves,
their battered, fragmented bones, mixed with a handful of torn rags,
are all that remain, a mute reminder of their selfless valiant sacrifice.

They endured brutal Apartheid harassment, detentions without trial,
torture in the cells, and mental anguish when loved ones disappeared,
they left their homeland, to continue the struggle against racial bigotry,
while countless others fought the scourge of white-minority rule at home.

Nelson Mandela and many, many others, spent their lives imprisoned,
on islands of stone, and on islands of the cruellest torture, yet they stood,
never bowing, never scraping, they stood, firm for ideals for which they were prepared to die,

and many, many comrades did die, at the hands of the callous oppressor,
and many, many comrades perished in distant lands, torn from their homes,
while the struggle continued, for decades, soaked in blood, in tears, in pain.


The Present:

19 years have passed, since freedom was secured at the highest of prices,
delivering unto us, this present, a gift of emancipation from servitude,

a freedom to walk this land, head held high, no longer second-class citizens,
in the land of our ancestors, whose voices we hear and need to heed today.

I do not care much for fashion, Lewis-Fit-On and Sleeves unSt.-Moron,
yet the ostentation that I witness baffles even my unsophisticated palate,

our ancestors' plaintive whispers are being dismissed, left unheeded, as
we browse the aisles for more and more, always for more and yet more.

Asphyxiated by the excess of the Petty Posh-Wahzee, we find ourselves,
perched precariously on the edge, of a dissolution of all that is humane,

babies go hungry, wives are battered, our elders left in hospitals for hours,
I cringe as I scribble these words, perhaps too sanctimonious and preachy,

yet I know, deep in the marrow of my brittle bones, I know, I know, I know,
this tree of freedom planted by the nameless daughters and sons of Africa,

needs to be shielded, nurtured, protected from our very own baser impulses,
so that the precious tree of freedom, may bear the fruit that may feed us all,

for if not, then we are doomed, to tip over, and into the yawning abyss, we shall fall.








Details | Verse | |

No Remorse

He destroyed her
               without hesitation
                     no recrimination
                              no tears and no hearts breaking
                                        no remorse.


©Danielle White


Details | Lyric | |

I've been crying

I’ve been crying

I’ve been crying
I’ve been crying all night long
Feels like I’m drowning
You left me here, you’ve done me wrong
So I just sit hear crying 
My heart it plays a sad old song.

Oh Lord, it cuts me
I think my heart has broke in two
My soul is weeping
Because my darling I love you
And now you’re gone. You’re gone forever
And me, I don’t know what to do

Yes I’m crying for you baby
Oh yes my love I need you so
That’s why I’m asking come back darling
I’m slowly dying, don’t you know

Oh, how it hurts me
Gives me heartache, don’t you see
Now you’ve gone away forever
Just you and him, it crushes me
I know that you don’t love me
I’m just a passing memory

Yes I’m crying for you baby
Oh yes, I really love you so
I cannot live my life without you
It’s going to wipe me out I know

Folk they say that someday
I’ll forget you, they don’t know
How much my heart is aching
How I’ve lost that living glow
I don’t want to keep on living
Because I really love you so.


Details | Epic | |

Long Time Coming First Kiss

                     Him
I have walked among the stars. 
As humble hope has risen in my heart.
Will she let me kiss her?
Will I pass the sacred test?
Should I bring her flowers,
To soften up her heart?

What if she denies me?
Can I endure the pain?
Should I try to closely hold her?
Or start with a kiss, gently lain.
Should I stare into her eyes?
Will she become mesmerized?

Will she let me hold her, in my aching arms?
Will she let me closely worship her smiling charms?
Should I spy a smudge to wipe from upon her cheek?
Then quickly lean in, to capture what I so desperately need?
Should I sneak my arm around? Or is that too cliché?
We can hardly look each other in the eye… too shy, too shy, too shy.

                        Her
First kisses are the hardest that is plain to see.
For we were both twenty-five and had not ever been kissed.
So I just grabbed my nerdy love, and beat him to the kiss.
I could wait no longer… or it might have been Christmas!
Four months later we were married, yes, that is true.
And I did the proposing… so again… what is new? 

Thank Goodness the love was true.


Details | Rhyme | |

Man, Dogs Best Friend

Man and dog, reputed best friends, rise above death’s fears.
With lives on the line, heroes save, minds and hearts in action.
Stories mount across counties where rescuers save many tears.
Not for any gain or fame, but for responsible satisfaction.
 
A perky little poodle, pretty, adorned in green and gray,
Trapped inside a smoke filled house could not get away.
Firemen forced their way inside in time to save the day.
She squirmed in the arms of safety, well enough to play.
(http://www.suffolknewsherald.com/2011/01/28/firefighters-rescue-dog/)

A black and white dog fell through the ice; he was not skating.
The thinly frozen water, his trap, oh, day in Rhode Island.
Rescuers came to save that dog; there was no hesitating.
They quickly warmed the shaking beast and gave a life-saving hand. 
(http://cranston.patch.com/articles/dog-rescued-by-fire-department)

A German shepherd gone astray in the Los Angeles River
Stood on a shallow watery ledge, amid rushing waters.
His savior dangled above the scene, without any shivers.
A struggle for life, one bite to the thumb…success never falters.
(http://latimesblogs.latimes.com/lanow/2010/01/los-angeles-firefighter-recounts-daring-dog-
rescue.html)

A candle flame, dog owner out, disaster begins to rage.
Five dogs in Colorado Springs saved while the fire burned.
One Chihuahua crossed the Vail to the great doggie sage.
But with love and a fireman’s CPR, her life was soon returned.
(http://www.examiner.com/dog-rescue-in-national/firefighters-rescue-five-dogs-save-chihuahua-
with-cpr)

Across the species border, thrives a caring respect for life.
Both man and canine have been willing to sacrifice breath itself.
Facing danger, against raging flames, bravery beyond strife,
A "dobbie" protects her puppies loving her babies more than herself.

The rescuer knew she passed through her fears and did so aptly.
He had risked his life for her and her pups, awareness shone well.
Both man and dog covered in ash with faces gray and sooty,
No bite, but kisses of thankfulness, she gave, so the world could tell.

© January 29, 2011


Details | Blank verse | |

What did I ever do except love you?

In stealth, you dealt the first stinging blow
A dual edged blade, it cut through my spine
Words of hate flowed effortlessly from you
What did I ever do except love you?

Like poison, your hateful tirade spread
A horrid venom, it seeped through my veins
Brought me to doubt all I know to be true
What did I ever do except love you?

In silence, my heart lay in pieces
An empty void, lost in unfulfilled dreams
Devoid of answers still one question begged
What did I ever do except love you?


Details | Ballad | |

Another Yesterday Gone

Blankets of mist surround the air
Birds start singing their song
A new dawn arises, a new day begins
Another yesterday gone

Remembering your sweet loving voice
Your body close to mine
Your tender words and kisses
I wish could be frozen in time

Although I feel you with me
In life I'm all alone
Lost and stumbling 
Down the only road I've ever known 

Nights I lay here thinking
In my sleepless solitude
Grasping, clinging to a past
That doesn't let me choose

My shattered heart still bleeding
The pain too much to bear
I know I can't be mended
I'm broken beyond repair

Please don't leave me here
For I'm so lost without your love
I'm ready to go with you now
Through the gates of Heaven above...
 


Details | Romanticism | |

Reflections in the Firelight

The wood is piled
my emotions riled
Sweet expectations
settle in my soul

Sweat dappled brows
my emotions drowse
sudden conclusions
fill in the hole

of my heart.

The fire started in the pit
warming ourselves 
in it's globe
and there we sit
like two lost elves
waiting to disrobe

Take your time,
Love
The perfect man
does exist.

rlm '09


Details | Free verse | |

There's Not Much More to Say

Now night hangs heavy
over me.

And meanwhile,
I am alone.
Lost in the past.

Why do I stare at you, in my mind,
with your dark eyes living velvet
in which I lose myself?
My fate's contained in yours.

Let us be extremely frank
and speak the truth about ourselves --
share our anxieties together --
discuss between us what sort
we can't be any longer,what sort
we now desire to be.

Fallen out of love with self-conceit
we shall not regret the loss.


Details | Rhyme | |

Manequin Memories [Mannequin Series 2]

Frozen is her heart,
plastic is her skin,
blind are her eyes,
forever mannequin.

I once lived a fairytale
of castles and blue skies
everything was perfect.
Yet, perfection's destiny is to die.
I only wish to dream
and never have to wake
to never again feel;
become plastic or fake.
I didn't want to breathe
forgot love and forever
for they were only words,
that murdered me put together.
Death was my prayer
and I wonder if God heard
that heartbroken plea
of such a sad little girl.
I'd gladly be a puppet
and live as another said
follow that string's pull
neither be alive nor dead
I would love to be plastic
to never have to feel,
love or sorrow,
man's Achilles heel.
So it was everyday
some piece of me went plastic,
to others I seemed alive
somehow something realistic.
I became what I’d wanted,
plastic became my skin
frozen was my life;
I am a Mannequin.


Details | Ballad | |

You Had Me From Hello

You live a million miles away
So far across the sea
Still I search the reason why
Fate brought you here to me

I never dreamed I’d feel this way
From just one night with you
And always I’ll be wondering
If you still feel it too

If I could turn the hands of time
Or change the rivers flow
You wouldn’t drift away from me
I wouldn’t let you go

I live a lie of happiness
So no one sees my pain
Because I fear forever more
I won’t see you again

Time will pass and tears will fall
But still I won’t forget
For you’re the one night in my life
I never will regret

Memories and dreams
Are all that’s left to hold on to 
But while I hold the dream 
Someone else is holding you

You were my “Once in a Lifetime”
The moment of truth in my lies
Never will I find again
What I found when I looked in your eyes

My dreams are what keep me going
And I can’t wait to turn out the light
In sleep is when I am with you
And I don’t want to miss you tonight

I'm now just a memory in your past
You'll think of once in a while
But somehow, I know each time you do
My memory will make you smile

I'll always be your Juliet
And you, my Romeo
Always I'll be waiting
Because you had me from hello...


By Raina Hutchins


Details | Rhyme | |

The One You Never Know

        

After the smoke clears from this room.
Will question why.
As you push me into  the depths.
As I lifted you from your self appointed gloom.

So take his hand cause happiness has another 
name.
You can close your eye's.
but it's never the same.

Can we ever forget that which we did
not understand.
you hide the pain.
But secrets dig into your soul 
like barbwire in hand.

She ran with what wasnt supposed to be.
Sweet suduction it was in such devlish fun.
To bad it was so very clear to all but me.

Under covers bodies without thought collide
locked in the passion of night.
Taking flustrations out in plessure.
You appear as a vision get your fix then vanish from sight.

Cheating the heart fractrued given to two.
You question  with lies.
As I yern to hold the woman I belive is you.

And so I exist in a mystery only you can
solve.
im the dirty secret across the tracks.
The dirt underfoot  in which my heart does revolve.

If only the feeling could last.
I question while off to another.
Would you stay it was you fading with the past.

Worn from it's trappings you crawl.
Wash away the truth.
Confession of pillow talk that
 seep into the wall.

So is the story of the confussed woamn who 
fractured her heart over two.
And the man who only did thirst for the 
one he thought he knew


Details | Lyric | |

I'm Nothing Without You

You were the reason for my smile
But it's been vacant for a while
You are the reason why I’m here
I’m nothing without you

You are the reason for my song
The tears I’m crying all night long
Where did you and I go wrong
I’m nothing without you

No one here to see my cry
When you tell me one more lie
No one here to watch me die
I’m nothing without you

Now I’m lonely, sad and free
Fading in your memory
Your arms are where I need to be
I’m nothing without you

No more sunshine; only rain
No more laughter; only pain
Forever lonely I’ll remain
I’m nothing without you

I know my broken heart won't mend
I know I’ve lost my love, my friend
I know my life has reached its end
I’m nothing without you


By Raina Hutchins




Details | Triolet | |

Greener Pastures

Feeling the rumble down the line,
greener pastures calling me there.
Daydreams of love and golden times,
feeling the rumble down the line,
conjures visions of love divine.
Grooming the need to go somewhere,
feeling the rumble down the line,
greener pastures calling me there.

Feeling the rumble down the line,
calling me home from far away.
Taking to heart the trembling sign,
feeling the rumble down the line,
my heart transcends all space and time.
It speaks the joys of yesterday,
feeling the rumble down the line,
calling me home from far away. 

© Aug 2010 Charles Henderson
For Nette's "Afterglow" contest


Details | Prose Poetry | |

Bleed

I see my life on the edge of a sword
And yet, I walk willingly.
With each step I take,
It cuts deeper into my flesh.
The blood pours out of my soul,
And I scream.
Yet I feel some relief,
As I walk to my destiny,
Not wavering,
Not tripping,
Not stopping.
Closer to Me,
This is all I ever hope to be.

Does my heart not bleed enough?
Does my soul not suffer enough,
That you have to cause me pain?
More grief,
More sorrow….
So much pain,
So much, so much.
Tired, weary
Trudging through.
Is this the light,
Where I see you?
Is it just an illusion?
Why are you playing games with me?
Am I not of you?
Deep in your soul, does it not hurt you to hurt me?

The sword cuts into my flesh,
Deeper and deeper,
As I walk forward to you.
Yet walking back looks harder.
This double serrated edge.
My feet are cut,
My soles are bare.
My soul is bare.

I have nothing left,
You deserted me there.
You opened up my heart,
And you planted seeds of hope and of sorrow
And you let them grow.
Now the wretched thorns of the beautiful blooms,
Prevent me from ever reaching,
The sweet nectar that I desire.

Why, why, why?
What made you lie?
What made you think it was okay…
To hurt me?
To lie to me?
To betray me?
When all I wanted was someone who loves me.
What did you gain,
From all my tears and pain?
From all my grief and sorrow?
If only things were different tomorrow.


Details | McWhirtle | |

This Valentine's Day

What happened to you?
You used to be so sweet.
The one and only guy,
My eyes would ever meet.

You were my man,
Once upon a time.
Giving me flowers,
And sweet valentines.

Now all I know,
Is you deserted me.
Won’t look me in the eyes,
And talk right on key.

You’ve become so cruel,
And I loved you so.
So this Valentines Day,
I’ll try to let you go.

From deep in my heart,
and deep in my brain.
All the memories we shared,
Will forever remain.

That I cant forget
My love is too strong
So this Valentines Day
I’ll try to move on.


Details | Dramatic monologue | |

Churchbell

Bones of rotting timbre mimic 
morgues of truth
Pleading memories of oaths to rigor 
mortised youth
Snide sacrosanct hides under 
shrouds of pride
placing careful snares under 
gleaming stares
These selective few
they ingratiate you...
Even the doubtful  few
These ephemeral ghosts clapping at 
unspoken jokes
Wheezing from their throats to 
laugh as they choke.



Details | Free verse | |

The Final letter

Dear Lover...

I struggle to gulp
the scorn you poured.
My mouth parched,
desperate for a sip of your love.
A taste of your lips.

Your engagement- an abomination.
Our relationship still floods
the plains of my memory.
Surges storming in my inner soul.
Questions bamboozle my mind.

So, your affection was a mere hoax.
I, the halloween freak?
Your tender touch, in fact a thump?
Our turgid, rose in bloom.
A flaccid, comatose weed?

I cherish our unending summertime. 
I crowned, knighted& sainted
your passion.
And you scorn me?
My Love, make no attempt to flee.
I will find you, her and your fragrant bliss.
A reeking carcass I will leave.

The pathetic yearning for the 
warmth of your suave flame,
Is dead.
And the need to draw blood,
Resides.

 ...with love, 
    
Your Real Bride.


For Dictionary fun...#1...Delilah`s words contest.


Details | Epitaph | |

Lee's Verse

Whenever a tunnel of darkness descends

Remember... there's always a light at the end

Face all your fears, and follow your dreams

For nothing is ever as bad as it seems

Things may go wrong, but don't be afraid

Lessons are learned from mistakes that are made

Life is not painless, but never despair

Just reach deep inside...and your strength will be there..



For Lee, my son-in-law, who was so very special to me.

Life will never be the same again... 
I will miss you for always xxxx


Details | Free verse | |

Unbearable Beauty In Lavender And Pink

Her name is Sadie and she is a cashier
at the drug store around the corner
from my current place of employment.
She always has a smile on her beautiful face
and a kind word for each customer she meets.
Sadie always dresses in a combination
of lavender and pink from head to toe.
I make it a point to visit the drug store
during my lunch break every single day.
I am slowly working up my nerve
to ask lovely Sadie out on a date.
I have yet to reach that level of confidence.
How can a mere mortal man such as I
expect a earthbound angel such as Sadie,
an unbearable beauty in lavender and pink,
to actually say yes to a proposed date with me?


Details | Ballad | |

Lying In The Darkness

Lying in the darkness
Nothing here to see
The shadow of my lonely self
Just staring back at me

Lying in the silence
Deafening to my ear
The beating of my lonely heart
The only sound I hear

Lying here remembering
The world of you and I 
A love beyond forever
We knew would never die

My tears are never ending
My vision always blurred 
No one listens to my prayers
My words still go unheard 

You showed me what it was to love 
You showed me how to feel
My love for you was endless
My life with you was real

I know I'm needed in this world 
Even though you’re gone
I know I must survive this pain
I know I must be strong

But always I’ll remember that
Again one day I’ll see
The only man I’ll ever love
The only man for me...


Details | Rhyme | |

'Betrayed Yet Again'

He was tall, 
dark & handsome!
I was ready 
to pay him a ransom!

I fell for 
his rookie charm,
All I wanted 
was to hold his arm!

So I approached him 
with fear in my mind,
To my surprise, 
he was super kind!

But I failed in my attempts 
to recognize him then!
Why do I meet guys like him 
over & over again???!!!

Sex was the only 
thing that he wanted!
The lack of love in his words 
made me feel unwanted!

I promise I won’t fall 
for a guy again!
Before doing so, 
I will surely rack my brain!

Dedicated With Love To: You Know Who

Note: This poem has been written from a girl's perspective.



Details | Iambic Pentameter | |

ONE NIGHT OF LEGEIA

    ONE NIGHT OF LIGEIA
Half from anxiety, half terror born,
I see her rising breasts, from pages torn
Out from a dream played out so long ago,
I knew I'd not forget, or ever know,
a lock of hair fell to where lace is worn.

The beauty of her eyelids vagrant line
becoming much a part of Poe's, and mine,
as candle light from distant chandelier
reflected from her eagerness to tear,
and made each teardrop fall in sparkled shine.

The night progressing through what's meant to be,
discov'ry of a soul mate's constant plea,
as hair of raven black fell to my face,
and fancied every nerve, throughout our chase,
while love's sweet ending, touched the two of we.

"I love you!'s" Feigning death, add to the spell,
she weaved throughout the night, we loved too well!
And when the end began, our Fifth Alarm
gave cadence to our pace out of the norm,
and brought the ending only Poe could tell.

Sweet love! Sweet dream! We died into the flame
from lack of heart to play out love's sweet game,
and hope to keep the ending constantly,
Orgasm of the soul, for Poe and me,
as close as love may come to stay the same.
        © ron wilson (aka Vee Bdosa the Doylestown Poet)


Details | Dramatic monologue | |

No Parachutes,safety nets,souls,or hope

Love is whispered and not forgotten
If this be so
I deaf to soft lipped invitations seek no thought of hope
I of no past collection hold thought
To forget is gruesome and beautiful

My eyes, swift allies in my war of world tell no lies

Silent in the 4 walled chalkboard blue
Shakespearean mad men twist their tongues with words of bland hue

I believe the concept of Ugliness is more profound than that of beauty
Dreams of my bladed face fill up behind my eyes...scratching my mind

Nothing goes SURPRISE! anymore
To love and lose is not the exciting protagonist to never having lost love

the optimists run in circles
pretenders of despair hunt themselves

Every street is Desolation row and my window is covered with blood

Nothing comforts anything
No advice

....just surprises


Details | Rhyme | |

Motherhood - Part I

Unprepared I am
For this gift and its trappings
Unceasing intolerable sobbing and gasping
With what shall I arm my fragile domain?
I am forced to endure all of your pain

Yet there you remain; desperate needy thing
How heavily you weigh upon heartstrings
Colossal guilt at my frustrations…
Silently enraged by well-meaning congratulations

Engulfing, drowning, diminishing my abilities
Overwhelmed entirely by this responsibility
Love refuses to come automatically
Remembrances of sleep dying dramatically

Yet there you lie…desperately needing me
Blissfully unaware of my insecurities
Deprivation, depression, and pain cloud my heart
While I watch all the others make it look like fine art

Effortlessly mothering, bright eyes and broad smiles
So sorry for you, that you have missed that by miles
Incapable of such patience, second-guessing my decision
Wishing for earlier precognitive vision

Yet there you are, sleeping quietly now
Entrusted to me, even though I have no idea how
To possibly show you what all of this means
To ever live up to all of you dreams

We’re bound together, you and me
For better or worse, for all eternity
So here is my promise, maybe all I can give:
I will never abandon you for as long as I live

Yet there you lie…aware of me even in deepest sleep
Turning towards me just to listen to my heartbeat deep
Within this fragile undeserving frame
Now I will begin to love you, as I whisper your name


Details | Ode | |

Mandela's grave

Remember ninety-five
When we felt free
We felt alive
We hugged and kissed
Rejoiced in freedom
Rejoiced and sung
Songs of freedom

Mandela walked 
As skeptics talked
But he walked on high
And touched the sky

He loved and he gave
The spirit of the brave
He forgave and reconciled
A sad and battered child

He gave us hope
He gave us life
He freed us from our thoughts of strife

He crossed the divide
Of crossword puzzle blocks
And gave us the clues
-	We threw down our rocks

But here we are now
Tectonic plates crash on our brow
Where is the hope gone?
Where is the future that we had won? 
As we slipped from meritocracy
To simple mediocrity
We look around
And all we found
Was our hopes dashed
Dashed to the ground

Our children suffer, forlorned 
Whilst louts with shovels shovel the gold
Of our future that was pawned 
For the few our future was sold

And as the fat asses
Roam around in masses
Eating the hay that was made when the sun still shone
Eating the food that the cattle had won

But brayingly they still prance around
Relishing in their new wealth found
As the baby dies hungry and cold
And the baby is buried in hallowed ground

Remember back in ninety-five
When we all felt thrilled –
Alive!
Remember the victory songs
Of how we would right the wrongs
But now we wrong the right
As for gold and wealth we fuss and fight

And in his cold and lonely grave
Mandela turns
And weeps
As his long road 
Stops
At his grave


Details | Rhyme | |

Dark Side Of Love

He used to be so fun and happy
Now he seems so sad and angry
He never seems to smile anymore
I’ve never seen him this way before
I just want my old friend back
The one who could always make me laugh

It only got worse as time went on
It was then I knew my old friend was gone
He started to get far and distant
I tried, but I couldn’t make sense of it
I started to wonder what went wrong
Was it something that could be undone?

I can see the evil gleam in his eyes
It’s all part of his journey to the dark side
Looking back I can’t help but feel it’s all my fault
Even thought it was his own choice to join the cult
I know there’s no one to blame
And in the end he couldn’t be tamed


Details | Ballade | |

Prolific, I guess that' me

Prolific, I guess that’s me

I read a poem by ilene Baur
Prolific, she called it
I saw myself right in those words
And it made me smile a bit
Then I asked myself this question
Why do I write so much?
Each time a subject comes along
My busy mind to touch….

Then I just grab a pencil
And a poem is written down
I guess it’s my addiction
I just hope that folk don’t frown
And say ‘Oh no! Not him again
Each time they see my stuff
I guess if I was in their shoes
I’d say “hey that’s enough!!!”

So bear with me good people
And If I cause you grief
By writing all these empty words
Then you may gain relief
By passing everything I write
Not reading it at all
And yet I hope this is not so
When you comment, it’s real cool.

8 August 2013 @ 0940hrs.


Details | Rhyme | |

Lies

How can I possible trust you,
When you lie to me everyday;
I try to do my best, but still,
I can’t believe a word that you say;

Is it really that hard to tell the truth,
To be honest with me about it all;
Instead you proceed to lie and cheat,
And tell me you love me through it all;

You do all you can to deceive me,
And try to cover up your tracks;
Do you really think I’m that stupid?
To not see you going behind my back;

I try and I try to forgive you,
For the things you’ve done in the past;
But you do them again just to hurt me,
And expect my love to last;

I can’t put myself through hell again,
No matter what I feel for you;
I think the time has finally come,
For me to say we’re through…


Details | Carpe Diem | |

Baptized In Equality

Contractual agreements with publisher caused DELETION


Details | Light Poetry | |

It's Not Harmless(Footle)

Your Flirt
Really Hurt


Details | Couplet | |

Valentine Romance

Valentines day is always something special to me, I explained. 
So I planned a romantic evening and got ready for my campaign.
The children were at a sleepover with their favorite friends they adore.
So I met my hubby as he came in, accidentally tripping and making him hit the door.
Thank God his head is hard as he hit that, the nearby TV, but very little more.
I made Cherries Jubilee as a snack while he sat there with an ice pack to his head. 
But before I knew it, I’d knocked it over and almost burned down the house instead.
When he finally put the fire extinguisher away…
I got up and got some of the kids’ apple tarts I had made. 
He bit in deep and burned his mouth, declaring he wasn’t hungry and the pain would fade.
Next he decided to go upstairs, but I had put rose petals down everywhere in spades.
And yes you probably guessed it… he slipped and ended up needing a little aide.
At this he decided to take an aspirin and lay down upon the couch. OH  HHWell…
But I knew the rest needed to happen above, to totally create this romantic spell…
I had to get him to the candles and bubble bath, where my romantic dreams still dwelled. 
So I got out some scarves and danced toward him, tying up his hands before he fell.
He never knew what hit him as he was lassoed and gently bounced up the stairs.
I guess I wouldn’t have had to tie his feet… a few words would have done as well.
But you know me when I get going, my mind tends to lose a few brain cells…
He was flustered, exhausted and bruised when he got there, but he’s made of the right stuff.
Though as I took off the scarves, he flopped on the bed pulling the covers over his head kind of rough.
He said he loved me, but living with me could be kind of tough.
He said it was better to leave it to him, for the romantic endeavors and such.
He said he had reservations and play tickets in his shirt pocket for later on that night.
But what he needed now was some aspirin and a few moments of quiet respite. 
So with a sigh he started snoring, and my romantic dreams were momentarily crushed.
I dearly love the man you know. But, do you think maybe I tried too much?


Details | Didactic | |

Second Thoughts

Why we always look away
From what our eyes desire to see?

Then we think
‘I should have…’

We look back
And we can’t see

It walked away -
We let it be

Why it always walks away
When we want to give a try?

We look back every day
And we pray for one last stand

Then we think back in regret
‘Why i hadn’t…’
Each time we cry

One day we will forget-
The day when we die


Details | Rhyme | |

Kataomoi (Unrequited Love)

She will not love me,
A silent judge,
Politely ignored,
I shall not begrudge.

For all that she is,
My passion remains,
Her art, her music,
Like blood in my veins.

Her language so fluid,
Her culture, main or sub,
But pride keeps me distant,
From her potential snub.

For all that I am,
Fat American pig, 
So blunt and so brash,
Snap my heart like a twig.

Remind myself of prejudice,
For weak heart and mind,
I avoid her presence,
So modest and refined.

With katana in hand,
She’ll rip through my gut,
But the distance between us,
Hurts more than any cut.

For we are East and West,
No acceptance will be won,
Still, my love will never die,
For the land of rising sun.


Details | Bio | |

Bio of a Heartbroken Fool

Kristy
Crazy, Erratic, Obsessive, Insecure
Sister of Jessie
Lover of no
Who feels the pain
Who fears the sea
Who would like to see the sunshine
Resident of heartbreak
Morris


Details | I do not know? | |

Too Late to Say

I can smell the pies a baking
Upon the warmest summer day
Even with windows wide open
It’s a scent not gone away

She was there before the changing
Making food just like before
But once the afternoon had come
It was the bottle, wanted more

Now there were many of us still under
Yeah, under the roof she called her own
But, to this child who knew no better
This was my mom and too my home

Despite the angry, angry bottle
That turned her feelings dark and gray
I knew my mother forever loved me 
Though I wished my mom away

How sad I am today
That the bottle
Made me wish my mom away

Many years were cast upon us
I had grown into a family man
A hard working, white collar worker
Trying to do the very best I can

With my wife standing beside me
I have strength to look back and see
My misinterpreted emotions
And all my mother meant to me

She was here to see my children
She tried to make up for all she did
But all she had ever wanted, really
Was to be happy and to live

For she had so many children
I was the youngest of her ten
Yeah, I was my mother’s baby
But I never knew what it really meant

Until now that I’m a father
And sometimes things, they get so tough
It’s so easy to dive into a bottle
But, it’s love that makes one stop

She did that for my children
But, I never really saw her change
And never had the chance to tell her
All my feelings, cause it got too late

My mother left this world not long ago
She met my dad on Heaven’s floor
My only sadness is I never told her
That I couldn’t have loved her more

That I was thankful for all her loving
All the gifts she had given me
For her teachings of life in general
And my family’s history

I was grateful for her changing
But not the woman that she was
She was perfect in that way


Details | Monorhyme | |

Stolen Tears

her stolen tears fall in peace
veiled from a world that will not cease
her knitted brows now show their crease
as she weeps into her comforting fleece
nothing can slow their rapid increase
as they finally find their release…


~Inspired by the wonderful Monorhyme by Nette Onclaud "Black Tears"~

Nette,
You are an amazing poet and you are missed here every day.
I hope that these words find you well and that you will be back 
to inspire more of us here at the Soup!


Details | Hybronnet | |

Faded Life

Stuck in a situation, Not knowing what to do? Blocked from all directions, Tired of being sick, throwing and feeling weak, The people I thought I can trust walked away, I am tired of selfish people, I am tired of being alone and fighting this without any support, When this should be your responsibility too! All you want to do party and play, I am tired of facing problems one after another, I need peace, relax and have nothing to worry, Yet you bring hell to me! All you care about is you and your career, While I give my life and risk everything for us & baby, I give up my family, my car and now I am broke and homeless, And all you care about is you and your dreams, It bothers me how you think & blind to see, My dreams and goals for my life is in the trash can, You keep asking for respect yet you cant even understand your women, Without a cause there is no effect, I just wish you would understand that! This is not about who wins or looses! This is about us fixing problems togather as ONE!


Details | Free verse | |

Forever Rider

Bleached bones of a fallen beast, Casting a shadow that points To the east, A cowboy rides out With a noose round his neck, Travelling north on a Perilous trek. The noose is a reminder That his life is not his, Not that he needs it To tell him the truth, He's atoning for sins Committed by him And the noose is just there For some proof. His horse pointing northwards, His spurs jab its flanks, It jumps on a journey It knows not to where, He has been advised If he gets where he must That he must handle all things With great care. Long weeks follow days, He ne'er stops for food, He feels neither hunger, Nor thirst or fatigue, His Horse is the same, Feeling neither hunger or pain, Though they travel on league After league. He stops on the brow Of a mountainous peak, To gain the bearings He felt he had lost. His eyes sweep the plains He travels in vain, Without ever revealing The cost. His life had been shortened For the most part by death, He had suffered For what he had done, His actions alone Had been the sole cause Of the loss of his wife And his son. And so for his torment He had been given a task, That he knew he must Always repeat, There was no respite And no task to be done And his journey would be Never complete. And so he rides on O'er the endless red plain, Destined as ever to Be all alone, And maybe one day His skull will be seen By another as abandoned Bleached bone....


Details | Free verse | |

Perfectly you

You say you aren't perfect,
but look again and behold yourself; perfectly you.
Your tears be heavy-laden with guilt;
also remember, they glisten with remorse.
The sea water of the eye cleanses wounds old
and leads life to the good vulnerability
that teaches humility and belief.

Singing; your voice awakens the dawn
and dancing you set the moon.
Entrancing, you smile
and for a moment I glimpse forever.
Joy's child is your way
and grace is in your name.

Awake in the watches of the night
He watches your panic weeping;
wanting your day to soar 
and set twilight leaping.
Stars twinkle in sympathy,
and meteors lead sight to the other.
Come away with me my love and wink at suns.


Details | Free verse | |

Could You Hear Me?

Ignorant questions you asked
While requesting in return intelligent answers

A pillow of tears I cried 
But only for awhile

Yet instead my heart was beating like a hammer beats a nail
And I was slowly decreasing like a paper being filed

Into shelter I would hide
Behind doors I cried
Over the  phone I denied
And  inside I died

As if hanging up in my face weren't enough
You left me no choice, but to fall asleep with your 
Thoughtless and careless words

The constant need to be in control of everything and everyone 
I closed my eyes to hold back those tears
Those tears that were trying so desperately to break through

But steadily they came running down my face
Like I was pouring water down a drain

But did you hear me
That language that I spoke

I was talking out loud to all the distant ears
I begged you to lower your voice
But you were to busy screaming at me to hear

You see I constantly found myself apologizing to you
Not believing that I had a right to my own opinion
And that I had a right to be loved and respected

I cursed at times, You kept me mad
And then most days you left me sad
But could you hear me
Could you take my point of view for once
After all that was said and done

My heart was aching and my soul was breaking
A little attention, Like a baby crying out for its mother
Is all I asked of you

Only to hear you speak your truth of belief
And then hang up in my face with a gasp of relief
As if my voice was killing you

When I defended myself , I never knew what I would face
Never knew how you'd react, But I was acting on faith
So I took that leap of faith, I didn't know what else to do
But thank God I found the courage to stand up to you

You made it seem like we were in some game
And half time conversations is all you could spare

Yet like a mother in the midst of labor
I bared all the pain, You couldn't bare

But I had to speak out 
My silence had to be broken

Words shattered at that moment
Shock encountered ones face
Something that never happened before

I would not pretend, That all was well
But you weren't listening to me, I was talking to myself

When I poured out my heart to you sincerely
You belittled me, cursed me, degraded and ignored me
Picked and devoured me like I was poultry

You took me through so much misery
You see this lonely faucet, Only runs so deep
But I found the strength to break free, finally

I wanted to be friends but I remember too clearly 
Just how it was in the past, When you couldn't hear me



Details | Free verse | |

Entwined...

I am an obsessive, possessive compulsive
Besotted by your flawed brand of perfection,
My love for you is a grasping fist -
Crushing you, slowly suffocating,
Squeezing the breath - and the resistance – 
from your lungs, from your soul…
Constriction breeds subtle friction, 
You flail now and then like a landed fish, 
But you can’t escape me darling…
You can’t get away because you don’t want to,
Your willpower has corroded, has eroded to dust 
I am your heroin, killing you softly as the old song goes,
Caressing your heart into fatal submission…

Oh I don’t deny, sometimes the drug wears off, 
And you have a bad trip -
Sometimes my whip lash fails to strike…
And your dormant defiance rises with bullish temerity…
Sometimes I nearly lose my hold, and the fist weakens, flaccidly… 
Then I have to rein you in and force a harsher bit between your gritted teeth
Ha ha, oh yes, it can be a cat and mouse game, this romance, 
A tenuous balance of shifting powers, 
Like tectonic plates, seething beneath the surface…
The scales tip seductively in your favor, then in mine -
Sometimes your fingers slip round my throat, 
The manacles of my love asphyxiating…
Sometimes I lead you by the ring in your nose, my bovine beauty – 
Sometimes it all becomes too much, like black waters rising, 
Closing over my humble head,
And I start to choke…to drown…
But in the end, my fingers are locked round your heart,
And if I go down – baby, so do you



Details | Free verse | |

Side By Side

Oh it's a beautiful night!
The moon is full
And the stars are glowing
While the trees, with Earth's cool summer breeze
Start slowly blowing...

A campfire's flames are burning so bright
While a young couple holds each other tight
Warming their hearts, as these two lovers embrace
Traveling together, through time and space
Oh how tonight, with their love, they won't hide
Two lovers forever, Side By Side

Under the stars, both of them lay
They've been together, happy, all night and all day
Holding each other, a sweet caress
While green grass stains her pretty white dress
But no words, to each other, do they say
Happy just sitting Side By Side, knowing no other way

Gazing up at the stars
Breathing in the night
Them together with nature
A beautiful sight

All the years they've both struggled
And how they cried 
Has led them here tonight
It matters not now
As they'll lie here forever, Side By Side


Details | Lyric | |

Sin And Poetry

As the night sets in, it's as black as it's ever been.
My soul is in ruin, and my heart is like a back pack carrying a load of sin.

In the closet my skeletons scream, and constantly torment me.
The rage in my blood stream causes me to blaspheme religiously!
I am doomed because I'm so consumed by that very rage;
Engulfs me like burning fire, wraps me like barbed wire that causes a rampage!

The malice in my heart craves the blood from a helpless foe.
I feel I'm being ripped apart like some dark work of Edgar Allen Poe!

So many sins to atone for, and I get on my knees to repent.
Again with my face on the floor, I pray I receive a love that's heaven sent.
The evil is eating me alive from the inside out.
I can't survive when I feel like I'm fighting a 12 round bout!

My greed has come between me and my family.
I just wanted to succeed, but I admit I did it selfishly!

I seduced Lisa knowing she was married to another man, I just didn't care.
As Lisa fell in love, I became her number one fan, and then I ended our love affair!
My conscience wouldn't let me continue on the path of destruction.
I think of the consequence of losing you and laugh because now I'm unable to function.

I now see literally that it is better to lose an eye than your soul.
As I write my sin and poetry, I cry knowing my heart is as black as coal!   


My new form written strictly for Constance's contest "Create your own form maybe" ? is called Stanlets because it consists of couplets and stanzas that rhyme and is a dark subject.
Jimmy Anderson


Details | Triolet | |

dinner in the wind

The wind chimes ring to a summer’s breeze,
        With the fragrant smell of hot chicken baking
                Wafting around, setting hearts at ease—
        As wind chimes ring to a summer’s breeze
—The rain falls gently on the growing trees. 
        The old couple waits with bodies aching;
Hearing wind chimes ringing to a summer’s breeze—
        With the fragrant smell of hot chicken baking


Details | I do not know? | |

For Bree, Paulie, Brooke, George & Sydnie...With Love

I know I don't have millions
To leave you in my will
But what I have for each of you
Is something greater still

I have a few possessions
For each of you to keep
Photographs and memories
I know will make you weep

All my sad sad poems
Written through my tears
All the journals of my life
I wrote throughout the years

My jewellery and diamonds
For Sydnie, Brooke and Bree
And every time you wear them
I know you’ll think of me

Jewellery and diamonds 
For George and Paulie too
To give them to your little girls
With love from me and you

I know you that you will treasure
All of the above
But something far more greater
I leave you... is my love

It brought you all into this world 
And helped you all to grow
With each and every step
I’ve loved you more than you will know

Each of you is different
You all have your own ways
From when you all were babies
And through your childhood days

Naughty things you said and did
The secrets you would hide
But even through your teenage years
I watched you grow with pride

The closeness that you share
Between a sister and a brother
The love I know is there
Has made me proud to be your mother

Now you’re all grown up 
And having children of your own
And you will share with them
The love and laughter you have known

Keep with you your memories
Your thoughts, your special song
No one else can take 
To only you, they do belong

Don't feel lost or lonely
Or afraid of what to do
Just follow your heart..knowing
I'm always there with you

Keep with you the knowledge
That even from above
Nothing in this world
Is greater than a mothers love

Never change for no one
Just be always who you are
And I’ll be right beside you 
Your forever guiding star...


By Raina Hutchins


Details | Free verse | |

Gloom Beauty and Despair...(for Envy)

I seem to fall in love constantly; 
Seem to find it everywhere I go, 
Half buried in the sand, like pieces of fallen moon 
Waiting me to pick it up and devour it – 
To shred myself to ribbons from the inside
The serrated edges slashing my heart, 
And painting my soul with bloody lacerations…
They say love hurts and they would know 
But they are men, with hearts cordoned off, locked up 
They don’t have my soft core of need and despair 
They don’t feel the things I do…
The things I feel for you 
Of course it didn’t come as a surprise – 
I handpicked you for your perfection after all, 
Chose you above a thousand others…
But that doesn’t lessen the pain, 
Or the crushing sense of doom that descended when you left 
And it doesn’t console me now, as I sit alone 
Trapped in my tower of solitude, miles away from you 
Not knowing if you could even comprehend this agony, 
Or the way my heart glimmers when you smile…
For all I know you are totally oblivious, 
Or just thought it was a bit of fun, a casual collision of souls 
But deep down I am hoping you aren’t that shallow, 
You didn’t seem to be, when you sat with tears on your lashes 
Mourning the way life has let you down…
Or when I gave in to my grief and you held me, 
Rubbing my back in soothing circles and murmuring your pity 
You know we are two tortured hearts alike, mirror images 
Your pain matching mine in bleeding lines 
We shouldn’t let this camaraderie go…
I don’t want to watch you fade away or turn your back 
Because I can’t spend another endless stretch of nights like the last one 
Weeping into my pillow as I listen to your favourite song…
I can’t handle that kind of gloom, beauty and despair, 
Not for very long…


Details | Cinqku | |

I Cry

I Cry!
She Is Gone!
I Cry Some More!
She Was My Whole Wide World!
I Cry!


Details | Free verse | |

Activity #3

I love how he acts all tough when he's around me,
But when he texts me, he calls me baby.
I love how she used to kiss me,
But now she's different.
I love how you used to mean everything,
But now you don't mean a thing.
I love how I used to care so much,
But now I don't care at all.
I love how people change,
But how they don't really change at all.


Details | Sedoka | |