These Women Limerick poems are examples of Limerick poems about Women. These are the best examples of Women Limerick poems written by international PoetrySoup poets
Before the "I do" she must choose
A man that does well in dance shoes
His psyche gives a clue
When employing step two
Ply him to the limit with booze
The poem in the mind
There is only enough space in my mind
For just a poem and there you I find
Can’t think of another thing
My mind singing what you sing
To all else except you I’m rather blind.
I know you are an involved mom of six
And what toll it takes bringing up those chicks
On your spirit and body
Your life was never gaudy
But the essence of such a gracious mix.
Adorable are your traits which are rare
Attributes, six, are your children so fair
They are love, care and beauty
Passion, power and frailty
Here’s the perfect woman beyond compare.
@ 23 feb 13
Entry for PD's contest on 5 mar 13
I become quite vain when around pretty girls.
And a whole flock of them makes my head whirl.
I asked one, "Do you have a disease?"
She said, "I was fine a moment ago, but NOW I wanna hurl!"
NOTE: This was based off a true story (though I exaggerated it slightly, for the sake of having it rhyme and fit with the limerick). I came into work one day and noticed one of my co-workers didn't look so hot. I was concerned and said, "Are you feeling alright today? Did you sleep well?". She just looked at me and said, "I'm quite fine, Timmy. I've actually had a full nine hours sleep... I just didn't take the time to put my make-up on this morning". Needless to say I never quite heard the end of it...
Limerick: Once a Woman-Cleanser in Malawi
for Seodi White
Once (a) Widow-Cleanser* in Malawi
Insisted (on) being paid double fee
The dead man made certain
Left gift (on) this side (of) curtain
Now Cleanser on (the) dole with H.I.V.
• The “Widow-Cleanser” is a Malawian professional
“intermediate husband” of widows imposed on women
who cannot – under the laws of Malawi - own anything
legally, EVEN their bodies. The Woman-Cleanser sleeps
with widows for a fee ($50/-) in order to prevent widows
and future husbands – from being polluted by the dead
This limerick dramatises facts divulged in a CNN interview with
valorous women-rights lawyer: Seodi WHITE on March 17, 2013.
© T. Wignesan – Paris, 2013
The woman who dreamt of a spider
Awoke to find it inside her
With a scream and a yell
she thought, " oh! what the hell"
Eight hands, oh my! what a provider
Oh! but the jealous thing She has eyes flaming green How to quench what hell spurns Where envy and mischief does burn Revenge on her lips she's an Irish queen
Taking sides in discussions holily
About whether Uran used his willy
Means you're trapped in their game -
Either side is the same:
Cock distracts, cash departs, crowd stays silly.
The National Poet Of Slovenia In A Language People Understand interprets important Slovenian affairs for the non-Slovene speaking world.
If You Don’t Want to Sit This One Out
It’s more than a domestic conflict cliché
It’s a fact that a female can’t stand the way
That the tall standing males
Each time simply fails
And the floor and the seat gets the spray
But you can’t blame it all on the male
Science has proved that a trail
Of liquid much more than mere inches
No matter how much someone pinches
Will bounce until it simply sails
So men – here I must be precise
If you don’t want to sit, than be nice
Take a step to the right
Aim it downward just slight
Pay heed to your uncle’s advice
For the angle of impact’s the key
As to just where the entry should be
Hit the side of the bowl
Down that side it will role
And how happy your woman will be
Raghead Nazis are really not all that bad.
They treat womenfolk like worthless crap and that is very sad.
They like to stick dynamite up their own asses
In order to blow up kindergarten classes.
Then again, maybe the dirty stinking rats are indeed all that bad.