Princess just wants a new car.
I have told her that hers will go far.
'Oh, it's really not cool
driving this crap to school.'
'Do I need that emotional scar? '
'The kids will all laugh at the rust.
When we race, I'll be left in the dust!
I will save up some cash
then we'll make a mad dash
to the car dealer surely you trust'.
'He will make us a wonderful deal
and I'm sure you will know how I feel.
I will love you so much,
My siblings... I won't touch.
Just get me behind a new wheel'!
Now she'll be cruisin in style.
She'll be happy for only awhile.
There will always be better
and we'll try hard to get her
a car that will make princess smile.
My hero is Henry David Thoreau
Rather than pay taxes, to jail he’d go
With Uncle Sam’s hand out
Thoreau turned up his snout
Refused the poll tax, voting he’d forego
An elderly woman across the street
High property taxes she could not meet
Her house went to foreclosure
Homeless, died of exposure
While the politicians live on High Street
Jonah dwelt in the belly of a whale
No taxes on such a home did prevail
But as soon as he got out
Jonah faced taxes no doubt
Moby Dick's "inner condo" is for sale
Entry for the Taxing Times contest
What will their eternity win?
Greed, as a vice makes some men grin.
Money is their God.
Poor folks bear guffawed.
Then games bring a different kingpin!
© June 1, 2011
Dane Ann Smith-Johnsen
At the risk of being called “rabble-rouser,”
I think poor old Barky Von Schnauzer,
should practice his aim,
his master to maim,
in the back end of his very best trousers!
My hero I would call dear old Barky,
if he could just muster the stealth of a sharky,
and covertly steer,
right straight for the rear,
of that great big old bag of malarkey!
I think I should send Barky a big four leaf clover,
so his bad luck would finally be over,
he could retire his fame,
move away, change his name,
to Bowser maybe Lassie or Rover!
Obviously I have been driven completely insane by that stupid t.v. commercial!
Happy St. Paddy's Day!
Oh, I am so angered, outraged and appalled
I think that I’m going bald
My dad had great hair
So I never really cared
But, to the hair club for men I am called
From my butt, they could extract some hair
Because I think I have so much to spare
But I cannot tell
Do you think it would smell?
Oh well I think, I’ll just leave it there
(Haiku)- * Motive, infidelity messing with the Queen Bee's Honey*
Queen Bee sits on throne,
Bumble and drone bees as one
Sample flowers dew
(Limerick) - *Admission of guilt leads to compensation*
Indeed this is how the story unfolds,
Pete said, "It's a poor rat with only one hole"...
Love had taught a sad lesson;
Divorce court was now in session,
Judge rules favor, Pete's pockets full of holes...
(Couplet) - *Take vows seriously payback often belongs to Spouse - Queen Bee*
Love said, "Pete too late you've opened your peepers"....
"Man, you should know it was cheaper to please her"!
Submitted for P.D.'s Divorce Club Contest (Haiku-Limerick-Couplet)
First he slinks off the field with a miss,
so forlorn, then the chance to do this.
Will we boo him to shame?
Will we drink to his name?
The ball is down. The kick is up! The kick is...
Let Him Go (Limerick)
Our mom told us how she chose her beau,
With an “eeny, meeny, miny, moe!”
Of course it didn’t last,
With a choice so half-assed!
But at least it taught the fool to grow!
Child Support (Haiku)
Had placed us in the middle
Of their divorce wars
He left her to fend for us alone, blasé with his remiss,
She chose to break this conjugal bond without marital bliss.
For (Destroyer ((Poet’s ~DIVORCE CLUB~ Contest
She's "concerned" that my mess is immense
"I work late." Is my latest defense
Yes, my yard is a wreck
But IF you must peck
Your big NOSE might get stuck in my fence
So you KNOCKED my troublesome trooper?
Tell ya what you prim party-pooper
I will warn you once more
Poke your head through MY door?
I'll slam it right square on your snooper
They assure you when they take your case
they will put your world right back in place.
So you shoulder the cost,
then they tell you: "We lost."
with such touching dismay on their face.